The Waiting Game Trailer by Onslaught Media

[rogitocos]

Man you go against Biblical Laws, it is not funny at all...

[johnnydizz]

rob riggle should never have left the daily show

[andrewfink1]

TEd haggerd is in a movieabout saving yourself........lol

also fundamentalist christian movies cant be funny.

[OurBenefactors]

why doesnt he just have sex, god is a pretty big asshole if he cares that much about people not getting laid

[Wasd3r]

I laughed so hard when the fucking Ted Haggard appeared.

[AuntieDiluvian]

Hmm - trailer got panned.

[Volvo745T]

Now that I view my post fundamentalist background as an ever-increasing distant memory, this seems ... well, odd. Odd as in misguided - stay away from sexuality IMO.

[BeeFaice]

Wow. Just, wow. -eyeroll-

[Coriolan]

wow that was shitty

[Water4Jeremiah]

"You can't save yourself?"

HAHAHA, you're kidding right? Stop waiting for a 'deity' that doesn't exist and take some personal responsibility and learn a little discipline.

[Water4Jeremiah]

If only Christians actually learned how to have responsible pre-marital sex instead of repressing themselves by waiting until they got married or not following their homosexual desires - at least then there would be a lot less meth addicts and rapists in the world :7 Too bad it's just a movie and American Evangelicals are the most sexually perverted, pleasure-seeking fucked up people on the planet.

For real, try Buddhism for a change. Srsly learn a little discipline to not desire so damn much.

[ArachCobra]

My girlfriend dosen't want to get married, and I'm supposed to die a virign then?

[QueenAnime99]

@ArachCobra You and your girlfriend need to have a serious discussion about this issue. There could be an important reason why she doesn't want to get married. (For example, you two could be religiously/spiritually incompatible, she could just not value marriage as much as you do, she could be asexual, have a low sex drive, have misgivings about sex, etc.) Good luck.

[PacDork]

Oxymoron:  Christian Entertainment

[dizzygillespi]

I had a LOT of premarital sex as a teenager. It was awesome. Wouldn't trade it. Also, I have lots of premarital sex now. Still pretty awesome.

But yeah, good luck with your movie. Hope you accidentally write a joke for it.

[ohxkristen]

So if I abstain from sex, will I be as much of a loser as that guy and all his friends? Right-o! Guess who just decided NOT to save themselves for marriage. Thanks guys! I see now that I should totally not wait till marriage and I'm really glad your video cleared that up for me!

[AdamAdventure]

LMAO. this made me laugh so much, and not for the reasons it was meant to. 

[mascadanator]

Do I spot a racial and political jab at the current Presidential administration?

[demongorr]

37 people are virgins

[knitwitdeni]

Thank you for teaching us and our children that there is a BETTER choice for prevention of pregnancy. Schools are still handing out condoms as the "best choice" to prevent pregnancy. THAT IS A LIE!! If you are fortunate enough to have a condom function properly, most girls walk away from their sexual experience with a heart and soul that have been PERMANENTLY broken and damaged!! Keep it up, Onslaught Media!!! Speak the TRUTH to our kids!!!

[NotAnotherGeneration]

@knitwitdeni It's one thing to challenge the youth to delay sexual activity until they are older. It's another thing to scare them with propaganda and tell them that a condom is a "provision for sin".

[QueenAnime99]

@knitwitdeni The schools that I went to ALWAYS explained that abstinence was the ONLY way to 100% prevent pregnancy & STIs. I don't know where you get the information that most females walk away from sexual experiences with a "broken" heart/soul. Some women who had sex as teens did not have issues from their experience b/c they had it when it felt right for them. Teaching abstinence is important, but we must also give teens sex ed. Leaving them in the dark is DANGEROUS based on numerous studies.

[LMichaelL65]

As stupid as this looks, the Ted Haggard cameo caused beer to snort beer out of my nose.

[AAmirkhanov]

Uh...wow. I'm not going to say anything bad about this, though I think the film is actually going to show teenagers why abstinence(as opposed to responsible, intelligent decisions about sex), is a really bad idea. Actually I'm just floored to see fundamentalist Christians at least being able to laugh at themselves. Out of curiosity though, where in the bible does it say men are to be virgins? 

[lobnlouie]

I grew up a preacher's kid, and then movie brings back terrifying memories of being scared into not having sex. Guess what, the kids who "waited" were just jerking each other off and doing everything else, then got married to the first other virgin they found. Then because of the decreased sexual activity during teenage/early adulthood a lot of them are porn addicts or end up getting divorced. Plus this trailer is awful, does Beyonce know about this?

[SoftNotchBlack]

this trailer is 2 minutes and 41 seconds too long

[Zebonka]

Quick question : since Rapture took your target audience away, who's going to watch your stupid fucking movie?

[butchkitties]

I went to a Catholic school that had a virginity pledge program. Most the kids in the program were not virgins. They signed up because:

A. It was an easy way to get out of class

B. The appearance of being dedicated virgins led to decreased parental supervision, making it easier for them to sneak around and have sex

C. It was something they could put on college applications

I bet they'd love to be a part of a movie like this.

[thabithskit]

They didn't have money in the budget for name brand ice cream... lol.

[lockwoodisafaggot]

can she at least jack him off....

[76Shredder76]

I first watched this thinking it was just a mock trailer. Sadly later on I found this was an actual trailer for an actual movie. Makes me kind of sad. A sad panda. You changed my emotion and my species in 2 minutes and 41 seconds.

[ozbrad]

Phil Collins must be rolling in his grave.

[BagOfGlass]

It's a beautiful thing to see that all the posts by the original poster have too many negative votes to be shown.

[NotAnotherGeneration]

The "problem" Christianity has failed to confront in any kind of realistic way is the delay of marriage. People in bible times got married in their early teens. Today people get married in their late 20's. It's a totally different standard to expect people to be 13 year-old virgins like in the bible and 30 year-old virgins like today.

[NotAnotherGeneration]

I used to attend conservative churches that teach that abstinence crap and I learned the leaders of those churches will crack jokes about 30 and 40 year-old virgins behind their backs. Now I just send my Christian friends to the website below that debunks the whole dogma against premarital sex in the bible.

tinyurl com/4ymwhcm

[navyk77]

Yes! You attached a gay meth addict pastor to compare what he did to losing ur virginity before marriage. Way to continue to alienate people. Yes!

[james1200]

Why is it that Christian "movies" like this one and Left Behind and really all of them, have a budget of two cents? If God is real, you'd think the Christian film industry would be thriving and Hollywood faltering instead of the other way around. Oh well...I love laughing at these people so I say keep it up!!!

[Dimenchemist]

Sex between two consenting responsible adults is always a good thing. No matter if they are married or not...

[butchkitties]

Treating virginity as a moral matter is harmful to women. Obsession with "purity" is why women are abandoned by their partners or sometimes even executed in the aftermath of rape. Even the Bible says that the worse thing about rape is that it ruins a woman's value, hence Deuteronomy's "you break it, you buy it" policy for raped women.

Wait to have sex because YOU want to wait, not because ancient men used God's will to make sure their money didn't go to someone else's kid.

[roninoutlaw]

Why the fuck would he be fired because his bosses daughter left HIM at the alter?

[butchkitties]

This whole idea of virginity being a virtue in and of itself is a leftover from the days of patrilineal inheritance. Men wanted to make sure their heirs were really their heirs, and in the absence of paternity testing, the only way to do that was to exert rigid control over female sexuality. Telling people it was God's will was just a convenient way of getting people to obey. In reality, virginity was prized for financial reasons.

[MrMythnam]

If you can find the funny part, you are better at this than I am.

[jbturk]

I had to watch it a few times, but I managed to masturbate to this.

[killingclipart]

Christianity is seriously a parasite... just attaches onto ANYTHING & EVERYTHING popular to stay alive, now it's going for Sex Comedies... gag... puke... gag....

[Mattakl]

I so hope this movie is made. Birdemic and The Room need some more company.

[SuperMooseStudios]

I will mail a check for $500 to anyone who can think of a way this trailer could look worse. I am being completely honest. It is a perfect storm of terrible.

[vervecovers]

@SuperMooseStudios I guess this will be the test of how "completely honest" you're being. 1. They could have used no lights. 2. They could have used no tripod. 3. They could have used a Flipcam. 4. They could have used the papyrus font. 5. They could have used a gradient filter the entire time. Please message me directly if you'd like my address so you can get me that check. You can send me $2500 for the 5 ideas if you like, but I'd be happy with just the $500. I'm being completely honest.

[SuperMooseStudios]

@vervecovers All of those things would have made it so bad it became ironically good (like The Room), which would have been an improvement. This isn't "so bad it's good," it's just BAD.

[MentalMaladies]

Ahaha, hahaha, ha- No.

[theandrewpolk]

Needs more record scratch.

[ixiwildflowerixi]

Interesting.

Though I'd much rather see a movie about a hypocritical hate-mongering con-man turned mega-church reverend who, after being forced out of said church for having been caught doing drugs and male prostitutes, gets back on his feet by milking the flock some more by asking for donations to produce cheesy b-movies with dubious messages.

Or how about a documentary discussing the molestation of thousands of children by priests for two decades and its criminal cover up by the church?

[rushdownking]

@ixiwildflowerixi I am not one to defend the born again community, but the molestation scandal happened to Catholicism not evangelicals. Also haggard isn't getting back on his feet, he's just trying to capitalize somewhat on his notoriety given that he needs money to live and support a family. I personally don't like the man. But he has to do what he has to do. Plus I can't believe his congregation never suspected that he was a closet case given that he has one of the worst cases of gayface ever

[aleekza]

I would never sleep with someone who has such poor Wii form. That's such a clear indicator of sexual prowess...

[jckstnly]

this makes me like 16 & pregnant

[Datan0de]

Sex is certainly not the focus of marriage (despite this trailer's implications to the contrary), but to deliberately *not* explore it with a partner and determine if you're compatible until after you've made a lifelong commitment to each other is the worst idea I can think of. You *might* get lucky and find that your mutual ignorance works out, but more likely you're setting yourself up for unfulfilling sex. For life.

Brilliant logic.

[mysteryeskimo]

"The film explores the real reason to wait...because it's God's best choice for us."

Bwahahahaha. Yeah, the ultimate omnipotent creator of the universe exists and one of his main concerns is our sex lives. Sure, dudes. Everything is all about you, isn't it?

[bartov]

I want to see all Judd Apatow and friend movies turned into horrible Christian movies.

[josephlleblanc]

This trailer falls into all the classic Christian movie traps: "message over medium" "everyone is squeaky clean except for this one character" "let's swipe a concept from secular media" & "let's guilt people into funding it because it's Christian and not from Hollywood."

How about some actual conflict? Maybe change it so the guy lies about being a virgin, gets married, the wife finds out, then they have to work through some lies and disappointments.

[nebulaskytrick]

overlooking the fact that this film is morally ridiculous, i'm actually shocked at how bad it looked from a production standpoint. the lighting is atrocious, the actors need make-up badly, the color correction is all over the place, and the gain in the car shot made the image unrecognizable. i've worked very low budget before, with crews fresh out of, or still in school, who understand far more about lighting, composition, sound mixing, shot choice, etc, not even touching writing or directing.

[bartov]

The lead looks like a cross between Rob Riggle and Luke Wilson sans any of the comedic or acting talents.

[PhysalisGundam]

Oh fundamentalist Christians, when will you realize that you're simply incapable of being funny?

[NullPoint84]

press 5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5 to find out how this guy manages to avoid sexual impurity.

[madamewoselle]

I can tell you one thing - I wouldn't want to marry OR bone this idiot.

[TheMightyShell]

If it insults your cult, or superstitions, don't watch the movie. Simple as that.

And stop saying you are a follower of Jesus, or a Christian. There's other religions in the world and there is such a thing as people with different opinions.

[lilyofthefoxvalley]

This is really insulting to Christians and women.

Or...am I being had and this has been lifted from Funny or Die?

[valkyrie470]

As someone who isn't a Christian, isn't a virgin, isn't married, and thinks abstinence until marriage is actually a pretty bad idea...

I thought this trailer was funny. Sure it's low budget, but the actors are clearly having fun with it, and the writing isn't the worst I've ever seen. The "you can't save yourself" moment made me feel a little barfy, but what rom-com doesn't have a few eyeroll-worthy scenes?

[WellConditioned]

Two keys to great movies are good directors and scripts. I'm not too sure about either here, but BAAAAAAAAAAAAD acting certainly doesn't help.

[L33Tspartan]

this is the worst thing ever

[ABTechie]

What is so sacred about virginity? Sex is wonderful. There are good and bad consequences. Learn how to avoid the bad and enjoy one of the life's greatest pleasures. And if you want to go with a Jesus says response to me, I will remind you that Jesus says it is better to choose to live like a eunuch.

[mrthundercrack]

lame. So funny I forgot to laugh

[rhingston85]

Wow. Someone spent money to make this thing? I wouldn't even call it a comedy. I'm also assuming the budget is listed as 'pocket change'.

[CrowsTurnOff]

Haha.

[NobodyKA1]

Seems your target audience has no sense of humor.

[crazispeedemon]

oh, c'mon guys and girls! So serious! The world needs another cheesy Christian B movie! Stop wit da hatin'!!!!

[Zen53GT]

And you guys want two mil for this. Nuh-uh. Don't think so.

[gossamer10]

Just goes to show how people that wait to have sex jump at the first chance they get to get married - just so they can have sex. Stupid.

[ImperiumDeus]

@gossamer10 No, it just goes to show that a filmmaker that isn't good enough to cut it in the mainstream shouldn't be allowed to make a "Christian" film. Terrible acting, bad caricatures, and a message aimed at the least intelligent audience possible is not "Christian."

[ImperiumDeus]

I've got to add...whose iPhone was this shot on?

Every aspect of this is insulting to Christian's with brains, taste, and talent. This is the worst aspects of Fireproof, The Left Behind series, and Facing the Giants combined.

Repugnant would be a massive upgrade over this abomination.

[ImperiumDeus]

This is one of the most horrendous things I've ever been assaulted with.

Repent of making this garbage.

[Dancleland]

This is utterly atrocious, in writing, direction, camera work/lighting, editing, the jokes are not funny, the 'actors' amateur to the point of embarrassment and the fact you've used commercial music that I highly doubt you've licensed goes against the christian values you purport to be promoting. What a ridiculous waste of time and energy, in support of an outdated entirely ridiculous social construct.

I look forward to this being taken down from YouTube.

[brxbrx1]

Is this an actual movie? I'm sad that people invested their time and effort to make this.

[brxbrx1]

I'm thinking that when it comes to men that look like him, "saving yourself" is a euphemism for "can't get laid"

[897667]

this is why religion is so fucked up, humans only existence is to fuck, your resisting life

[poetdesmond]

The only thing I laughed at was the idea of Wii Chess, until I googled and found out it's an actual thing.

[transmothra]

But wait! Butt secks is not really secks in the eyes of the Lowered, amirite fellas?

[rustywheeler]

Barf. Good one, Onslaught Media LLC. lol

[the1tigglet]

didn't work. i still wanna have sex LOL

[TheoIsTheGreatest]

Phil Collins should sue, too.

[TheoIsTheGreatest]

What born-again Christians don't realize is that they're already a joke. They don't need to "try".

[heavypizza]

how much is the licensing for "All the single ladies"?

[TheoIsTheGreatest]

@heavypizza "Licensing"? They clearly stole it. Which I'm pretty sure is against one of those Commandment things.

[fuzzypeach83]

I'm embarrassed to have grown up in a culture where this is an acceptable movie for "winning souls."

[funkycoder1]

This might very well be the best trolling ever. Great to see Haggard regained a sense of irony… (really, this is the way atheists should invest their money. Billboards with ugly fonts and ridiculously obvious messages don't cut it, poking fun does)

[theMaverickJester]

The Forty Year Old Virgin did this much better.

[Tastentier]

Ted Haggard? Seriously? The rabid homophobe who does drugs with gay hookers in his spare time? Can you get any more hypocritical?

[Mistraker]

It's got "All the Single Ladies" AND a Nintendo Wii in it. It MUST be hilarious, and furthermore, appealing to the under 30 generation.

Lord, please save me... from shitty christian media productions.

[heavypizza]

@Mistraker yup !! the under 30 IQ ....

[TerisOneil]

This is exactly what I think the trailer for HANGOVER 3 will look like.

[MsReasonAddict]

Another great MST3K movie in the making.

[Hdtexan]

who would WANT to fuck ANY of these losers????

[MUEagle2002]

How do you fundegelicals expect to be taken seriously when you put out stuff like this? lol!!!! I'm sorry...but this is just too cheesy. I'll stay on the sidelines as an agnostic and just laugh at wathcing you guys wage the culture wars.

[Cha4k]

Cringe humor?

[alienisuntverus]

I love it when religion tries to get people to go against the simplest forms of human nature. It makes it a lot easier to abstain from.

[SockRP]

As someone who enjoys movies, this film offends me. The message that you're trying to get across doesn't work in this day and age, as most kids have sex at 16 and up. Even Christian kids. When it comes to teens and sex, religion doesn't have a big impact.

If your goal is to get people to not have sex before marriage, there are better ways to do it. If your goal is to create a funny movie, that many people will enjoy, then you shouldn't try to shove a moral message down our throat. Don't do this.

[shreyg]

"Abstinence Never Felt SO Good"

In fact, abstinence never felt ANY good.

[transmothra]

What, what's wrong? Christians are HILARIOUS! This is gonna be GREAT! Tommy Wiseau's The Room is so 2007 anyway.

[abluequandary]

@transmothra YOU'RE TEARING ME APART, LISA!!!!

[lehman]

LOL @ ted haggard, the rest, meh..

[MECHAunitAMH1]

This is a joke... right? Please tell me that this movie is a joke.

[Tejayes042383]

Truthfully, while the premise is a little goofy, with some good writing, acting, and an eventual emphasis on finding true love over "just waiting for the sex," this idea could work as a cute romantic comedy. If only this trailer showed ANY of that. Q-list acting, jokes a fifth grader could improve upon, camera work that's cheap in a non-charming way, dubious editing skills... Apparently the message is more important than quality filmmaking.

[dragonfang196]

good god that was the worst waste of time and I would like two minutes of my life back, jesus.

[DangerousTalk]

Wow, this looks like the worst movie EVER!!!!!

[Abena20]

Well, he may not be getting married, but he always has his hand.

[Abena20]

So, the moral of this story is get married so you can get laid.

[rangerscowgirl]

Oh REALLY! What insults me is the preacher who turned gay and did drugs, Ted HAGGARD, while he stood at the pulpit preaching down and sending to hell, those who did exactly the same thing.. HE MAKES ME SICK.. AND FOR THIS REASON, I WILL NEVER WATCH THIS MOVIE... keep your children away from him..

[rangerscowgirl]

Oh REALLY! What insults me is the preacher who turned gay and did drugs, Ted HAGGARD, while he stood at the pulpit preaching down and sending to hell, those who did exactly the same thing.. HE MAKES ME SICK.. AND FOR THIS REASON, I WILL NEVER WATCH THIS MOVIE... keep your children away from him..

[thebaronvoncarson]

You gotta try before you buy. This is why celebacy is wrong!

[theredpillplease]

@thebaronvoncarson It's not celibacy, it's abstinence you fool! Celibacy is for life, abstinence is until you get married.

[sldfable]

I will abstain from this movie!

[conanthepunctual]

There's a lot there to be insulted by. As I have limited space, I'll pick one thing that is easily inferred from the trailer. It appears that his motivation for marriage was sex and his disappointment was not as much the loss of a life mate but the loss of his opportunity for sex. That's shallow and simply not funny. It may not have been your intent (and may be clarified in the film) but it is what comes across.

[onslaughtmediallc]

@conanthepunctual You're right, the main character of the film remains a virgin for all the wrong reasons. So after he's left at the altar, he's trying to decide why he waited. The film explores the real reason to wait...because it's God's best choice for us. We wanted to have a unique story that would attract both Christians and non-Chrstians. I know we won't please everyone but thank you for your feedback.

[ZactheMadMan]

@onslaughtmediallc No, he got married for the wrong reason. He main motivation for getting married was so he could have sex. The reason for that was because he waited. If he hadn't waited, then he would have married for love rather than sex. Good job sending completely the wrong message.

[lautour]

@onslaughtmediallc When God performed the first marriage Adam broke out into poetry he adored her so much. The problem is this protagonist is of very poor character and extremely self-centered. This is a problem for the movie because it seems the filmmakers share his views of women and marriage. The women he dates are the objects of scorn and laughs in the trailer. You're focused on why he remains a virgin, whereas the real problem is why is he getting married and why should anyone marry him?

[BoredInfidel]

@onslaughtmediallc This will not attract non-Christians, because non-Christians think that the Christian obsession with sexual purity is remarkably creepy.

[faceyfaceface]

@onslaughtmediallc

Dude I think you've failed. You've managed to attract no one. The results seem pretty overwhelmingly negative.

[Raptorman117]

@onslaughtmediallc Onslaught, listen: Commendable intentions and "wanting" to reach non-Christians and Christians alike aren't enough. The movie's not out yet (far as I know), and already it's being mocked. You want to make something that WILL touch everyone and stand the test of time? Then learn the crafts of moviemaking and great storytelling. Intention and desire will never be enough. Carrying out a plan with excellence will help.

[conanthepunctual]

As a follower of Jesus who was intentionally a virgin when I married, I find this insulting . . . really insulting.

[onslaughtmediallc]

@conanthepunctual Please elaborate.

[ryan212]

@conanthepunctual I DON'T CARE.

[lockwoodisafaggot]

@conanthepunctual obvious troll is obvious

[3mmcdonal]

This is complete crap.

[AutumnMorningMusic]

Great preview Rich! Can't wait to see it! Best to you!

Chess