Thursday-11/08/11-Thankful Thursday-Rachel-Dealing with Comments from Others

[msvioletsun24]

How did you get to this point of being able to tell yourself "i don't care what they think, i'm gonna do what i'm doing"? I really try to tell myself that but end up feeling depressed (probably because i dont truly believe the rational)

[WeRFreEDomFighters]

@msvioletsun24 I don't think we do believe it, or for a long time. And I guess for me it is about trying to trust that maybe I am a good person. I think by dealing with feeling like you are a good and worthwhile picture, allows us to not be so over focused on how we look. And then as build self confidence, we care less about others. I jope that makes some sense xoxo

[msvioletsun24]

@WeRFreEDomFighters Yes, that makes sense~ Do you find tho, that while it gets easier to ignore comments from some people, it's really difficult when the person is quite important to you? LIke.. it's easier to face my parents but boy does it upset me when my husband makes the tiniest insensitive comment. Obviously I don't believe my husband does this on purpose, but the fact that he loves me makes it twice as upsetting.. does this prove i still am not convinced that i am a good person? hmm....

[siajane118]

@msvioletsun24 I agree, when it is the people we love, it hurts even more and is a trigger for us to feel negative about ourselves. And I guess trying to trust that we are a good person, and trying to distance ourselves, not forever, but until we are stronger, can be helpful. Also seeking out those, and the relationships that do makes us feel good. Friendships can be incredibly powerful in helping is manage some of this. My friends, can be a huge resource for reassurance. .... (part one)

[siajane118]

@siajane118 (part two) Is there any way you can talk to your husband? It doesn't have to be a massive confrontation that cause an argument or conflict, but if you can prepare something, a piece of writing even, that you can share with him. Do you feel that could be possible? <3

[msvioletsun24]

@siajane118 Yea, he's been my greatest support! But he has difficulty understanding... he thinks food should be enjoyed and appreciated PERIOD. You know? So it's a struggle to tell him his comments are so triggering. When he acts insensitively I naturally turn away n become distant. My therapist sees this connected w major trust issues leading to want complete independence from anyone who could hurt me.. But I obviously want to trust people more.. have u struggle w this?

[bluepaperdollies]

looking sunkissed and lovely as ever hon. Its good to hear your voice. Excellent vid hon - I totally agree and relate with the paranoia that often comes from comments, even if the comments arent actually negative. I guess we try to educate others and to raise awareness of the impact things have - as well as talking to others as we do anyway and helping one another to learn to deal with comments, compliments and critcism in healthy ways in accordance with what feels right to each of us xxx

[WeRFreEDomFighters]

@bluepaperdollies yes :) xoxo