Series of Tubes

[internetsante]

The man was obvioulsy ahead of his time, the internet really did become a series of tubes ...youtube, porntube, tube8, nudetube, redtube... and so on.

[TheSeanpoppa]

this is hilarious internet gold

[hybridpanda]

THE TUBES ARE FULL! RIOT!

[jmmassey59]

Smart people become doctors, lawyers, entrepreneurs, artists etc. Untalented, frustrated people go into politics (mostly men with small .... compensating) so we are where we are, and it's getting worse... vote them out of office. There should be still some common sense prevailing in spite of all the media xxx - conservative or liberal, most people share the same concerns - family, education, health insurance, the right to work and earn

[TechnoDevotee]

His voice is having buffering issues

[i3u7n5]

This is one of the greatest things ever.

[ceriusStra]

This guy has most likely NEVER streamed anything but diarrhea of his mouth... and a greedy mindset.

[dumanator1]

I hear they have color Tv in the lower 48?

[dumanator1]

Thank you small aircraft?

[mwells219]

So wait, how can you prove the internet is not a big truck?

[GrammaMe]

But what happens to your personal Internet? OMG, I'm weeping with laughter. However, the person who commented that this is a great example of why Congress should not be allowed to make laws re: the Internet is dead on target.

[ReDUmBrEllA12]

bumbling idiot

[micecereal]

Ironically this guy was killed in a plane crash on the way to a fishing trip...the plane experienced turbulence because it mistakenly flew into the series of tubes which are invisible to the naked eye. It was determined that a man in Portland, OR caused the plane to get "all tangled up" in the breaking bad episodes he was streaming from netflix, causing it to careen into the side of a mountain.

[tuffasgong]

@micecereal Nice try...

[tacoswamper]

YOU CAN'T REGULATE A SERIES OF TUBES!

[ShadowriverUB]

@tacoswamper ISP regulate your tubes, they got bandwidth do they? :p

[mrfatmancory]

this man might not have any idea about what hes talking about, but a while love and tolerate the shit out of this dude. seriously, what would he say about the upcoming peta bill?

[0g0dn0]

I'm going to join a protest in NYC tomorrow, and if anyone asks me why I think senators shouldn't be allowed to setup rules that regulate the internet, I am quoting this guy. These people know nothing about the internet.

Another good example would be the guy who said "drive on down to your local internet," but I can't remember who that guy was, and I can't find the quote anywhere.

[MultiJerbod]

He doesn't say anything withouth five euhhms between it , he doesn't even know what LAN is I think.

[blockhawk23]

Net noob approves.

[MizzElissa]

I don't think he has any idea what he's saying.

[garrethdavis]

These are the kind of people who think sopa would be a great idea.

[TheIcingFire]

Ted Stevens: "All i know is that the internet is...

Page 404 error

Please diagnose or check with your administrator



[azmirreader]

That's what happen when "Ted the plummer" becomes a senator!

[logstrain]

stupid asshole

[ukiemilitia]

Couldn't do anything but laugh at him.

[genericusername5370]

@ukiemilitia I'd laugh. But there's many more like him on Capitol Hill that are going to screw it all up.

[DarqeDestroyer]

I bow before the insight of Ted Stevens. No more profound illustration of the internet has been devised than the Series Of Tubes example.

[o0gman0o]

MY GOD is this guy Porky freaking Pig? Why does he keep studdering so much like that?

[kionmon]

@o0gman0o Because he doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about.

[MrCorporalTunnel]

If 'Pro' is the opposite of 'Con' then Progress is the opposite of Congress.

[Stealthsuit07]

I actually do understand what he is talking about, but it's also apparent that he has no fucking idea what he is talking about. In other words, he makes the right conclusions from a deluded point of view.

Dear Ted, massive amounts of "Internets", or E-mails as they are more commonly called, are not responsible for your poor connection or delayed correspondence. Rather, it's probably the fault of your fellow Republican politicians streaming gay porn.

[TheLastBrainLeft]

@Stealthsuit07 Barney Frank is a Democrat.

[joiless]

It's amazing that nothing has changed, judging from SOPA. They still have no idea what the fuck they are talking about.

[Dangerous689]

You can almost hear the Spaghetti dripping out of his every Orfice.

[slowlybutfasholy]

lol

[rollmasterross]

These are the brain trusts that bring you SOPA.

[modshroom]

what the fuck is he even talking about

[bobbyewing311]

lol what the hell is this guy talking about "IMMUNE TO DISTANCE!" hahaha and "local to local connections ACROSS THE COUNTRY!"

[zeaig]

People like this shouldn't do speeches, He trips over his words constantly. It just makes him look like a fool

[TheSkelwor]

@zeaig And of course stuttering and general speech impairment is a sign of low intelligence. I mean, look at Stephen Hawking.

[Boxmanboxman]

Did anyone else hear a report laugh when he said "It's a series of tubes."

[chrispak1988]

the only thing that made sense out of this incoherent jabbering was "internet".

[Napkin65]

Before the hearing, his staffer briefed him on the technical aspects of the internet by describing the flow of information in the only way the old timer, Ted Stevens, could understand; "It's like those air tubes in office's, you know, like back in the 20's or something."

[Napkin65]

This is the man who believes he and his colleagues are competent to regulate our interwebs

[luckyStrike89ru]

These are the old fucks that are in charge of the country passing the ridiculous bills. They dont know wtf they're even talking about, for fuck's sake JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP.

[chenalos]

The internet was at its best when it was this guys job to regulate it.

[newdogma]

Where's Tosh.0?

[phuckstix69]

holy fuck this guy is a fucking moron.....although technically yes we are connected to other continents by network of cables.....he calls em tubes....but, this guy really has no fucking idea what he is talking about



[desromic]

What happens to your own personal internet? I, just the other day, I got... an internet was sent by my staff at ten o'clock.......

Me:

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa­aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa­aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa­aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa­aa

[Axmand]

Rest in Peace Senator Ted Stevens, this is your greatest Legacy for all the world.

[MrTheevilmage]

Thanks ted I didn't know what the Internet was until you said what you said....thanks....I think :L

[Krothie]

After all that babble he finally gets his point across. Which is correct sadly. For example the call of duty modern warfare 3 servers crash the day or day after the game was released because they couldn't keep up with all the bandwidth.

There is alot other bull sh*t in this rant but his main point is true to a certain extant. That's why internet is evolving from dial up to dsl to cable to fiber.

[nikoknighten]

He's pissed because he still has Dial-Up

[RandomAnonamo]

My staff sent me some INTERNET, and I didn't get it till this morning! It got tangled up!

[russellwarner1]

babbling idiot XD why is he allowed to even speak?

[vasilealexandru]

he's probably pissed cause he has a 56K connection

[wwwertdf]

WE UH BUT BUT UH THE LOCAL TO INTERNE TO ALASKA LOCAL TO GET BUTH THERE UH SERVICE A BUT HUH WHEN WE THAT THERE INTERNET TAKE UH BUT WHAT ANYONE UH BUT THAT MASSIVE PURPOSES BY BUT UH BAH BUT UHAHE BUT UH THE ENOURMOUS ENTITIES WHAT THEY BUT USE FEDEX MAIL FAST VAST INTERNET NOT A BIG TRUCK.... ITS A SERIES OF TUBES!!. ENOURMOUS UH AMOUNTS OF MATERIAL

[dolotsofacid]

Sent at ten o'clock in the morning on Friday, I GOT IT YESTERDAY. Why? BECAUSE IT GOT TANGLED UP WITH ALL THESE THINGS GOING ON ON THE INTERNET COMMERCIALLY.

[blood4glory1]

sounds like hes drunk

[phatboy249]

83 people thought the internet was a big truck.

[albaneenesk8r]

Ashley the internet is not a damn truck. now you get it

[georgehu2007]

can't help but think of the "what you just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things i've ever heard" part from billy madison

[jupiterfive]

My staff sent me an internet

LOOOOL

[Smael64]

how does he get a political position if he is a horrible speaker (no offfense)

[MiralGS]

@Smael64 money.

[zmorell]

@Smael64 He's dead, so I doubt he'll be offended.

[weswii]

his voice is on dial up

[404notfoundpro]

It sounds like Porky Pig.

[mrfatmancory]

at least he tries, he has my gram-pa beat in that matter.

[Cyanide89]

I don't see why this was such a big deal? It was a decent analogy... his speech was just terrible.

[Hawk21480]

Does this guy even know what he's f#%king talking about?! Seriously...

[philjk9372]

series of ch00bs

[zietda2]

Shut up old man!

[pwnurnoobazz]

A series of turbulence experienced in a plane

[JacksonTVNerd]

Delete system32, Senator.

[Blasted9001]

Well if they sent him the whole Internet, it's no wonder it took a while.

[eitrig]

Tubes how do they work?

[thewindseeker9]

the internet isn't a truck?

thanks for the info

[Daggerspine107]

wat

[TripleXBrad]

i just search tubes and this is what i found.... FAK THE POLIC



[lemonrind]

I named my wireless hotspot "Series of Tubes".

[etheangel2220]

@lemonrind

i noticed that! thanks for not putting a password!

[vash47]

Man these were the glory days of /b/, now it's just a worthless piece of shit.

[Daggerspine107]

@vash47 How was it the glory days of /b/?

[Daggerspine107]

@vash47 I mean how is THIS the glory days?

[BritishBlueSigma]

@vash47 /b/'s always been a worthless piece of shit.

[forlornblade382]

wi wi and and but but uh uh

[thestranger4812]

I've never heard such drivel.

[johnwaynegacy94]

I use the internet to start the 3rd World War.

[psihoxxx]

internet can be rationalized... its a series of tubes that can be fileld ;)

no seriulsly it's no biggy to undestand how it works, you just need some computed/hardware oriented knowledge and someone to explain it to you proper :P

[luckyStrike89ru]

Old people seriously need to stop TRYING to rationalize internet, its futile and they make fools of themselves. Internet is an enigma, somethings are just best left alone and STFU.

[PhasmatisApparatus]

Drugs r bad kids.

[JulianusFlavius1]

ugh... I once had a birthday card get stuck in those tubes... came out dripping with porn xD

[ion1984]

U mad bro?

[AdmiralZinji]

The internet his staff sent got caught up and tangled because of netflix.

[4cellar2door0]

Wtf, I have never heard of this mystical ancient Netflix!

[markothevrba]

So if I get a big tube (drainage instead of water pipe) will my internet be faster?

[Crsjcc]

FUCKING WINDOWS 98!!!!!!!!

[mysterykcad]

@Crsjcc Get Bill Gates in here!

[BurialSerge]

everyone he was talking about valve.we all know how long it takes them to get anything done.

[EvilApple818]

@BurialSerge Valves control tubes, you know.

[mysterykcad]

So wait, I can send my packages through the internet instead of having to give them to UPS? I never knew that. Could someone tell me how to make it fit in those tiny tubes?

[killerbumble]

I hate when a pakage I order something off ebay and it gets tangled in those tubes.

[weltec2]

I realize that TS is dead... but this is hilarious. It is amazing to me that there was ever anywhere in the US where there were people ignorant enough to elect this individual to office...

[MrMaryJanes]

@weltec2 They elected Obama and Bush...Why not this jackass?

[ButterflyFallacy]

I was sent internet two days ago. STILL ISN'T HERE.

Must have got tangled in tubes.

[MrVirajSinha]

2:12

[Quex01]

And you give to these people your tax dollars?

[Hkmedic]

I think he trolled everyone.

[calebwright111]

internet was sent to him? why doesn't anyone send internet to me ever?

[Squidpus]

His staff sent him an entire internet. 100 petabytes worth, all RAR'd up and ready to go. THE INNERNETTE

[AtheistCole]

I just got the other day, an internet was sent by my staff, and i just got yesterday, and WHY? It got tangled up in all that other internet.

Wtf was this man on.

[c4ke333ter2]

what did he say?

[irock1839]

WE UHHHHH BUT BUT EH AH INTERNET EH UAEAEAE EH EH

[AZIlluminati08]

its better to have your mouth closed and look like a jackass, than to open it, and remove all doubts. this man runs the N.S.A. ... i think were safe enough.

[AZIlluminati08]

its better to have your mouth closed and look like a jackass, than to open it, and remove all doubts. perfect example. hes just educating the old folk,

[L0LHAH]

It must be over 9,000 tubes

[cProg1x]

How in God's name did someone manage to turn this into a REALLY good song?

[galaxybeing]

Quite ironically, he died in an airplane, which is sometimes described as an aluminum tube. The air transportation system could be described as a series of tubes. So he died in A SERIES OF TUBES.

[10110101100]

It sounds like he's trying to hold a fart in while describing the internet.

[clutchmc22]

all his tubes are belong to us

[lemonsyay1]

I think he's trying to say that he got an email a day after it was sent because people use netflix

[SuperMegaLoser]

people used to vote for this guy? nice.

[PeaceIsNotJustPeace]

this is why its called youtube

[xxvdanvxx]

Just the other day my Internet wasn't working so I dug up the tube in my front yard and found the obese hamster that I ordered last week blocking it and all the other stuff that I asked for were backed up behind it

[interstellarsurfer]

Oh noes! My tube is full!

[SOSTacoJohnson]

gogogadget republicans!



[SteelVelocity]

And also to -- the great Ronald Reagan.

[shitthrowingmonkey1]

These are the kind of people that think if they sent an email to the wrong address they can catch it before it gets to the wall by yanking the cable out. How can people be THIS STUPID.

[hYpNoXiDe]

@shitthrowingmonkey1 Well.... technically they can. However no one could possibly be fast enough to hit send, realise they made a mistake and disconnect.

[shitthrowingmonkey1]

What in the fuck keep people like this away from a computer their stupidity is going to seep over through the series of tubes into everyone else's head.

[msteele321]

It's downright scary that somebody like him was in charge of running a portion of government.

[SuperDrunkMoose]

this is soo wrong everyone knows the internet consists of fax machines that think the thoughts of someone who lived 10,000 years ago

[cubfan531]

I got that bitch an internet.

Bitches love internets.

[OhNoNotMyPenis]

by the lag he has my guess he is using real player

[zinkadesh]

Lol he's buffering himself.

[Arceusdude222]

@zinkadesh he's not just buffering himself, he's TRIPLE-buffering himself on a 56k modem connection! XD

[oppaisoft]

Is he trying to explain lost packets being bottle necked through actual physical tubes? lol Though I think we should be glad the guy who was put in charge of monitoring internet traffic didn't know shit about it.

[mysterykcad]

@oppaisoft Explain that one to me. A guy like that is likely to blame the entire internet for the messed up shit on 4chan.

[BertGrink]

that guy sounds like he's completely clueless, what a jerk

[comrade127]

he's just demonstrating dial-up

[icanmyshoetie]

going on to eh uh eu o i on the internet...

[thugnasty1124]

THROW AWAY YOUR MAGIC JACK! GET RID OF YOUR WALMART CONNECTION!

[N3bu14Gr4y]

"The Internet is not just a big brothel you can get your porn from. It's a series of boobs!"

[testy462]

So... your email took several days to arrive because of netflix?

Drop the 56k dog.  Hell, get some hotmail, its instant!

[Chaos89P]

HE'S GLITCHIN'!

[246buthead]

He's a n00b t00ber!

[georgeforeman89]

he says "internet" 13 times in this 2 and a half minute clip. that comes out to saying it 2.6 times every 30 seconds...i found this very amusing and very redundant lol

[FlowCell]

Did this idiot get a stroke?

[mysterykcad]

"The internet is a series of tubes, and grown men want to put their privates in the other end of those tubes."

GTA made this about 100 times funnier in one sentence.

[GARRETtKILLZz]

he reminds me of al gore.

[laurabeanne]

omg AHAHAHA @firebomby LOL!!

[HeadInjuryGamesPro]

The transcribed captions make him sound like he's a drunk guy.

[ultranet]

In 2008, Stevens was embroiled in a federal corruption trial as he ran for re-election to the Senate. He was found guilty, and eight days later was narrowly defeated at the polls.[4] Six months later his conviction was dismissed on grounds of gross prosecutorial misconduct.[5]

On August 9, 2010, Stevens died in a plane crash[6] while en route to a private lodge.

[ultranet]

@ultranet Obviously this guy was only thinking of internet.... and people as "consumers" . "Those people ask for regulation" . Obviously this guy got payed big for promoting those agendas .  Internet = consumers = Big corporations that ask for regulations . THE INTERNET IS TUBES . Thank you God for crashing his fucking airplane . We got rid of a useless and harmful idiot . TUBES .

[sammosammy]

This is the closet his generation ever got to understanding the internet.

[sneasalmaster]

Internet ≠ Big Truck

∴

Internet = Series of tubes.



[MyOverflow]

@sneasalmaster

∃internet: internet = tubes ∧ internet ≠ big truck ∀tubes ∈ series

[PirlKnighte]

@sneasalmaster true knowlage there

[Raxxer1993]

Ted Stevens is the only person ON EARTH who lags while talking.

[notmarcofilms]

when you first get elected to the sentate you wonder in amazement "how did i get here?!", then after a week you wonder in disbelief "how the hell did all these other guys get here!?"

[sebway23]

SERIES OF TUBEZ o no my tubes are all clogged up with movies!

[RynOSauruS100]

Why is he talking like this (stuttering so badly that you can't understand him)? Is there something wrong with him? (I'm just curious, I'm not trying to insult him)

[KingdomAwaits]

@CapitalES Indeed.

[joope666]

Does this guy have an actual speech impediment or is he just a bad liar?

[ambulancecore]

listening to this man speak is giving me a seizure

[teke252]

rest in peace ted stevens

[Killermike2178]

Must have been related to Lauren Caitlin Upton aka Miss South Carolina Teen USA 2007.

[jeffryder9]

...what did he say? 

[MrJosiahT]

Error 404: Tube not found.

[standinstann]

It's all binary! Okay! you type in a 1, a 4, maybe a 12, a couple if 17's, and you have windows.