I think the most detrimental effect of it all is that it robs young confident girls of their subjective center at some point in early adolescents and only the strongest find a way to take it back...I think that is become true of boys too...in some ways. But we have the numbers and you can see it happen to the daughters...only those lucky enough to have REALLY grounded females and males in their lives seem to get past it in tact...
Guys have definitely been getting it hard over the last handful of years in this department (no pun intended). Just look at the explosion of the penis enlargement market which has capitalized on the fears of 'inadequacy' in countless men, and I don't see it stopping there; once an actual safe and viable way to enlarge the penis is introduced - wow - there's going to be an even stronger flow of $ in that direction.
To put it in a slightly different perspective, just ask yourself this: who wants to settle for being just 'average'?
The concept of 'averageness', of 'mediocrity', usually does not sit very well in other areas (i.e. profession, scholastic endeavors, money making etc.), so why wouldn't that mentality cross over to our physical looks as well?
We live in an age of excess: excess success, excess food, excess money, excess power - it's an infection which, sadly, leaves no cultural stone unturned.
@Adrian101882 What about being unique rather than a clone?
'We live in an age of excess: excess success, excess food, excess money, excess power - it's an infection which, sadly, leaves no cultural stone unturned'
Exactly. Take a look at my latest video, its relevant: watch?v=jEfW1ft4Q-U
Incidentally, sorry it's taken me so long to reply. YT has just informed me of your comments. I'm not sure why it took them 2 months :S
@Adrian101882 Explosion? I assure you, while the advertising of spurious supplements and prosthetics may have increased in recent years, the market for such things has been going strong for at least decades.
its not as simple as being thankful for how we happen to be or celebrating our uniqueness. looking good is an ancient concept whereby those whom culture defined as good looking were the most successful. fat people are often unhealthy and will not live as long, ugly people stand less chance of finding a mate and breeding; sad facts. sight is the primary sense through which we percieve things, making image important. cultural norms change over time, its not fascism its cultural evolution....
"why can't we celebrate the way we happened to be....or that we're unique?" because we percieve the world around us by sight, judgements are made by perceptions of this sense. fat people are unhealthy and will not live as long, ugly or odd looking people have less chance of meeting someone and spreading their genes...sad facts. trying to look good is a perfectly normal instinct born of the subconscious desire to survive, cultural tastes change with time, its not fascism its cultural evolution
No one is going to dispute the basic principles of health and attraction. The issue is the extremes now expected and the emphasis the media place upon it, the fixation on purely physical appeal, rather than other equally imporant issues like abilities to nurture, support or good relating etc. Virtual starvation, unnatural enhancement or self loathing is certainly not healthy. This is not evolution, it's materialism wrapped up as something else.
are you sure people are really pushing this? because it seems to me that people who are too fat or too skinny are looked down upon the same way someone who drinks too much is looked down upon, and the only people who try to conform to some unrealistic "perfect" look (like people who get plastic surgery for example) seem to have massive insecurity issues and people know that in most cases it doesn't even look good
Interesting. I'm sure I could site many instances where the way I look has been an advantage or disadvantage. I'm a pretty slim guy and I'm sure I've been on the receiving end of violence in the past simply because I'm an easy target in people's eyes. That would be a disadvantage naturally. While acquiring the affection of another person in a romantic sense is often, unfortunately, down to their view of your physical appearance. Personally people's appearances don't impress me. Rob x
While theres a certain natural tendency to be attracted to someone who appears healthy and so on, I do think we can get beyond the obsession with appearance which is rammed down our throats.
Wonderful video. Yeah I think most of what I want to say has already been touched upon in other comments. Having vitiligo has been an interesting journey though. I remember clearly what it was like before it was noticeable and every year I can see a marked difference in the way I'm treated by strangers depending on how much of a tan I have. You can be at ease with how you look but even then you need to have strategies to deal with those who are not.
suspicions of what we don't understand and wild assumptions can make life emotionally treacherous for the person being judged, be it someone's weight or an uncommon genetic anomaly. If vitiligo was as common as freckles it wouldn't be an issue. You can't after all do more sit ups to get rid of your freckles.
People carrying extra weight is common however, and maybe because we're endlessly assaulted by images of size zeros and exercise tips it's considered acceptable to judge heavier strangers and ourselves. Our bodies arent fashion, yet we try to sell physical types, physical ideals as if they are. Wait a few years and you may be in vogue or an out dated fad.
It amazes me that so many can't see this. That they get sucked into the myth of being in vogue or that looking a certain way is the only acceptable way to be. Though as you point out, that will change, and then you've had it. It's like the carrot on a stick.
You're in a relatively unusual position, being able to see the differing response to you as your condition develops. In some ways we all have similar through ageing, or potential other issues, but that's much slower and so I guess easier to get your head around. I sometimes wonder if we were all a bit more childlike and didn't feel so uncomfortable about asking questions it might help. Mind you, that could get infuriating as well. Do the reactions have much impact on how you feel about yourself?
It did at first... up until college. I think if anyone is pointed at and ridiculed day by day and if other people are hesitant about touching them it has an effect... but now I'm at ease with me and aware it's just something I have to deal with. Vitiligo has a high suicide rate because of the emotional alienation it causes. I now work with kids where the questions come thick and fast - I couldn't do a job like that if it was still a problem for me. :o)
bravo, I'd say that video was the perfect weight :) The catwalk: jeez, that's pretty skinny minus the pretty in my humble opinion. The fashion industry has become so unsubtle in it's misguided values that it's just kinda displaying it's rotten goods with pride. They may as well have a barf bucket at the end of the runway, maybe incorporate some drug taking and weigh-ins into the routine. Fashion aside, life can seem cruel, finding context to no longer feel a victim is probably good thing :)
if there was a positive representation in the media of all shapes and sizes it would of made a huge difference to me i think i would of enjoyed my body more if there were real women to look up to rather than impossible body types which became my role models when i was young which only gave me an eating disorder and made me misserable
Indeed. While there seems some small attempt in the media to shift this it still encourages obsession with appearance rather than celebration of our unique selves in all their aspects.
I can see you might have thought that. That got me 5 million views on another video. lol. But this time it's different. Several people have sent this out because they wanted it seen. It's got me quite a lot of subscriptions as well.
And revealed it needs to be, but all these issues like overweight, underweight, beauty, what have you, these are all just superficial and unpersonal opinions that echo on and on until they become clichés. No one ever really reaches out to someone right? Everybody loves to talk about these topics along with Kate Moss, how come? But I don't know what I'm getting at and maybe this all sounds like gibberish again.
What you say never sounds like gibberish. You do sound very cynical though. Sometimes a tiny spark can make huge changes. I'd rather continue to try anyway, than say 'whats the point?'.
Well I can be cynical. If you ask me we are living in a dark time and I'm not talking about financial issues or terrorism. But I am not cynical person. I think I'm a minority in believing that we can actually evolve, emancipate. At least the top 40% of the society , that are actually able to think. I have the feeling that most people tend to think that it is as it is and try to take care of their own things not thinking beyond that scope.
I think I can say that the term fascism is in this context a misnomer. (never used that word before :) ) But what is the plan here? Should we prohibit too skinny models? You always make inarguable(non-disagreeable) points, about phenomena that nobody can do a thing about. Let's conclude this again that if you bring up your children properly and conscientiously , they will be able to make the right choice and not become a: pole-dancer, gangster, anorexia-patient, terrorist.
The plan is to raise awareness. Only when its absurdity is realised can it ever change. It's going to keep shifting anyway, only the direction is open to negotiation.
Looking for linear solutions to complex problems is not going to work. Do this and that will happen is unrealistic in this context. We shouldn't prohibit anything. Personal awareness and responsibility are key, not paternalistic thou shalt nots (every bit as bad as shoulds).
That was not at all what I was suggesting! I believe that in fact you should raise your children so they can think for themselves. So they will make the right choice. The problem is that most people are sick, mentally incapable of making choices, clinging onto ideas that are near psychotic and making it into dominating and obsessions. For instance ideas of beauty, power, wealth, etc. Sometimes valid goals but they become perverted.
Therefore the general beauty trend is not the problem. People should not be educated about magazines and the generals consensus on beauty. It can only come from within a person.
All this is true. But it is not wise to take a parental attitude. You and I are 'people' too. All these things are incredibly powerful, influence us all to a greater or lesser degree. You cannot look inside yourself for the answers if your gaze is always drawn to such things. The mirage needs to be revealed.
But the mirage is created by the person. I do not really believe in pear pressure, except for among children. People that fall for pear pressure have the same problem in the first place of not being able to think critically for themselves. They are dysfunctional. If you make them aware of one thing they'll jump to another. This is why in this communication age people are jumping around from here to there to the next fad. One thing that people refuse to look at is themselves.
i am going to get some pissed of remarks to this i know lol,... but we are attracted to thin, more athletic body's because evolution has programed us to choose the best mate, the one who will be more likely to live longer, hunt and stay healthy long enough to take care of there children, slim athletic men or women have less heart desiese, diabeties, cancer, ect,....a slim fit body is better able to survive then an obease one,..... its natural selection,...survival of the fittest,
Not at all. This video isn't about sitting around becoming fat and unhealthy, it's about the impossible 'standards' we're expected to attain and maintain, which are not only unhealthy but quite ugly, with the industry trying to seduce people into spending millions on makeup and surgical intervention they simply don't need. Most people, if they eat reasonably, exercise and listen to their own bodies, are healthy. But the demand of so called perfection is insidious, unattainable and damaging.
im a vegetable. i need to get motivated to make videos. im overwhelmed with ideas. i just been planted watching. This was a great video tho, really makes me think. ive thought of this type of thing before, but never heard anyone talk about it.
lol I think sometimes it's good not to make them, take a break, step back. I'm sure once you start there'll be no stopping you. Glad you enjoyed this one. :)
One has to wonder if body structure is for the most part derived from our genetic makeup then can the same be said for how we perceive the world around us? Is the very discriminating nature of evaluating looks genetic or is it something learned or engrained in people's psyche's? Indoctrination or evolution?
There is an inevitability that we'll evaluate and discriminate up to a point. Obviously (given the opportunity) we're going to choose a partner who is likely to help us produce healthy offspring. The indoctrination is in what we're told is attractive (which is now unhealthy and often no more than a mask, therefore a deception) and the weight of importance of the constancy of that requirement.
Thanks so much for this video...I'm subscribed.....
My body suit has obviously affected me, because of the social conventions surrounding a plastic ideal of beauty, and I am measured up to some kind of materialistic ideal....however, I find that this quote, from an anarchist poster i was given, makes some sense :)
"Beauty must be defined as WHAT WE ARE, or else the concept itself is our enemy"
I am just an average human who believes in God. Look at my videos, they speak by themselves. I don't know many who denounce Icke, Jones, the Pope, Bush and Zionist false Jews at the same time :)
I don't hold the truth, I can't produce it either. I just reverse-engineer some lies, just a few.
My experience of living in my body has not been pleasant. I've suffered from a profoundly negative self-image since I was a little boy and been suicidal since my teens. As I approach 40 it's only getting worse and I wonder how or why I'm still here. I've had only a few friendships and no romantic relationships. I've not had so much as a friendly acquaintance in nearly a decade. My life has been devastated by my early response to the tendency of others to ridicule those they deem imperfect.
I really appreciate your sharing this, and I don't imagine it was easy to do so. If more people were able to break this kind of silence perhaps less people would find themselves in this unfortunate position.
I like the fact you haven't simply blamed others, but can see your own response played a part. I sincerely hope you can find a way to break through this and find people with whom you can relate.
If someone wants to be one way or another, that's fine by me.. If they're happy. But I do not buy the genetics argument for fat. If I took a person genetically dispositioned to be heavy and put them on a tropical island where they had to hunt their own food, that genetics will quickly melt away.
Not entirely, there are three body types. The endomorph is most likely to be rotund and to store a lot of fat. This is the person who will struggle to lose weight and find it easy to put it on. But of course intake plays a significant part.
I wonder how much struggling to loose weight actually happens.. Do they get up off the couch to struggle? Do they break a sweat? Anybody can change their metabolism with exercise and food management. Most people are not educated about which kinds of foods effect us. Sorry, I'm not sold.
I'm not sure that's relevant unless you're close to someone who claims such a struggle and are therefore impacted by it. If we were all to look to ourselves rather than judging others and what they should or should not be maybe body fascism would not be able to be perpetuated quite so much.
I have big friends.. Does that make it relavant? I suggest alternative diets for them but they either don't have the willpower to stray from the comfort foods which tinker with their pleasure centers, or they just don't want to eat food they can't taste (as their taste buds are hopelessly numbed by the constant barrage of salts & fats). If one gets up off their backside and starts working out, and regulate their diets, they will lose weight, no matter what they believe their propensities are.
You make some relevant points. Weight and the whole psychology of eating is complex. Yes, if you eat less you will lose weight, it's not rocket science. But many people with weight issues are in denial, or using food to suppress their emotions, or unable to see how serious the consequences of their eating might be, or in an addictive cycle. You can make food taste good with herbs and spices, taste is something of an excuse as well. But ultimately, you can tell your friends till you''re (more)
@Loreleila One more thing.. It's not strictly "Eat less to lose weight" either.. I eat alot of food. But it's quality food, and I lift weights. The more muscle tissue you have the more calories you burn, even at rest.
@Loreleila One friend of mine was able to dismiss all of my points about diet and the health hazards of his weight until I said one thing. He is putting himself at risk of a stroke. But even that wasn't a catalyst for his change. He started getting chest pains. Turns out it was just acid reflux but he thought it was more serious and even after learning it was reflux he began to change his ways and has been losing weight. Albeit slowly. The only exercise he does is walking.
@Loreleila (Cont.) but you are correct, they will not change until they are fully ready and willing to do so. In MOST cases, it is best to teach by example.
@carm3d: I agree. Most people are fat for the simple reason that they eat too much and are not active. The modern lifestyle is not condusive to good health and many have become too lazy to do anything about it. Like it or not it is still all about calories for the vast population.
You answered your own question. You are stupid and ignorant, a very bad combination of idiotic traits. Remember to tie your shoes before you leave your trailer today, asshole.
How about this. Make an insult and I will rank you on a scale from 1 to 10. 1 being the lowest on the scale and 10 being the highest on the scale and the score reserved for the best insults. Come up with 5 insults that are creative, original and funny and we will see how you rank. Good luck, i'll be rooting for you.
I'm not the one who's trying here, you desperate dolt.
Out of respect for Loreleila's request I'll let you go this time.
Now you can relax, the grave danger is gone, you don't have to battle suicidal thoughts and take more advils or xanaxes today. Take it as a Christmas present to all fugly fatshits...
You scored a 1 again. Your insults are lame and boring. Come on, give me some real original insults that are creative in funny. I'll give you another chance. Go ahead.
I agree with you on many things you said in the video but I think there is something to consider. I know that every human being has a different body structure but to be obesse and say thats the way it is is just wrong because that is not healthy. I know a couple of people in real life who are a litlle overweight and perfectly healthy but when i see those people who have like 200kg and say that they are comfortable i just can't understand. You shoul try to be more healthier and not thiner.
I'm not suggesting we should all indulge ourselves to whatever extreme suits us. In a way that's almost a reaction against being told how to be anyway. But if we were to listen to our own bodies and their needs without getting hung up on what we're told to be I suspect we'd all be much healthier.
People are attracted to attractive people. That's the bottom line. It's not just "sex sells", its "attractive sells". SOOOO many girls I know like and dislike performers of all types based on how attractive the guy is. I'ts ALWAYS been this way...it's how we are wired.
So with that in mind we should concentrate less on teaching children to "look on the inside, not just the outside" and concentrate more on teaching parents how to instill great self esteem and a positive self image in their kids
So I believe its about educating parents. society will always place importance on looks...thats why women like guys in suits and uniforms and thats why we dress up for job interviews and "look our best". But if a child has great self esteem they will hopefully focus on their positive attributes (physical or otherwise) and accept that they arent perfect and accept it. Trying to better oneself is fine if it is for yourself and not for others.
My body suit has worked out ok for me...some girls find me attractive and some don't. I never think about it really...I like lifting weights because it is fun for me and it helped me get a decent body...but it was for me and not others.
I look in the mirror and see a guy staring back at me...its that simple. All guys look the same to me really...but thats cause I'm a guy...women can see a difference but most guys can't.
If you're happy with what you see before you, and how it works, maybe you don't need to think about it so much. Maybe having an attractive healthy body is easy, and that's what makes it attractive.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to look your best, or to be attracted to the attractive. This seems to me more about how such a thing is to be defined, because it certainly isn't what we're all pressed into feeling we should be. You're right, because if we teach our children to have self esteem because of who they are, whatever that is, they will not be so easily brainwashed.
Oh, and I do have weird hair growth: very little body hair, except for the top of my head(the stuff does not seem to stop growing) unlike many of my friends who are showing signs of balding. But no matter how I am perceived by other I am still shy.
Externally my particular "bodysuit" turned out average. I have a naturally muscular frame/body with an extremely high metabolism; which affords me the luxury of not gaining weight based on the junk I eat. The drawback, is that I am almost always hungry. :O/ Though I am on average, kind of short(only 5'7) for a man, but so far I am not physically limited because of my height.
My suit is a bit broken, a lot broken... I know I felt better when I was a bit smaller and so i often think I should lose a few pounds for that reason. I don't feel bad about that but there is another reason I do feel pressure to lose weight, even when doing so is very very hard for me... to look better, to have more choices of clothing, to not have a double chin... when I have those moments I am as you say a slave to this limited notion and it hurts.
It's a hard balance to find I think. To learn to listen to what feels the best way for us to be without either trying to please or spit in the eye of those who decree such limits.
It's all about selling us something, sex sells. We have been sold this idea, if you look a certain way, you will be happy, you will be successful.. and unfortunately it's many times true. At least the success part is. I dream of the day it will change.
You're right, and I hope one day it will change. But it won't unless people start to say no to it. Of course because they want to sell us something, and keep selling us something, nothing is ever quite good enough either. You always have to make sure you can get or be the next best thing.
When I was in my teens I was, at 6' 1", taller than just about every one of my peers (I think today that would be just average!!). I always looked older than I was and with long hair I resembled an IRA prisoner. Not surprisingly then I was stopped and searched quite a bit by the security forces and recieved my fair share of thumpings. Now as I get older I recocgnise that I get my hair colour gene from my father's side (hardly a grey hair) but unfortunately get my hairline from my mother's side!
I've heard similar before. Being a certain colour or wearing a certain type of clothing apparently earns people a lack of trust or to give others the feeling they have the right to do them harm. Assumptions are dangerous things.
I've been pretty lucky in what I inherited from my parents. My goodness it could have been a disaster. lol
Good video, Loreleila. I don't think that the body should be an issue that is either obsessed or celebrated. It simply ought to be acknowleged, then to move on. There already is a celebration of the body as it is, which is the celebration of "life". It is that celebration which even though people may not be pleased with their looks, and even to prefer to look differently. For the most part, it doesn't usually take away the pride of their life, in terms of being alive/dead.
People even obsess over their being alive, which relates to their use of their individual pride, in controlling other people's rights, such as the right-to-die. In the case of obsession, it causes many of those obsessed by their appearance, to be critical of others, especially critical of the disabled. People try too much to be more than they really are in nature, which are living disease-prone beings, guaranteed to die. If that realization were widely accepted, society could become much better.
It's an interesting point you make here, that it extends to people feeling they have the right to define what choices others should be able to make, or what is or is not an acceptable way to be in many respects. It's a complete absurdity really, I'm not sure why such thinking is so prevalent. But then again it's been going for centuries, with church or state controlling peoples choices.
Great video, and one that will be received differently by different people.
Personally, i think this kind of thinking about what ones self looks like can have huge effects on peoples self confidence and then possibly their career choices, partner choices etc.
And the flip side to this whole topic is what's then appealing to an individual as well.
Like art, it is very subjective, and bound to be different depending on the person.
I think "attractive" is generally easier for the individual.
You're right, it is being received differently, and interestingly.
I would agree with your assessment here. It has more of an impact that we imagine, yet in many ways is highly individually based. I wonder how it might be if we were all encouraged to find our own unique way of being in a physical sense, rather than conforming to whatever the media decrees.
That media can be a real pain in the ass, the mass manipulation of our population (myself included) bugs the crap out of me.
I believe that what the media shows to be the current trend in clothing or the way to look is something that is always in flux.
Currently there seems to be an obsession with thinness that defies logic, and I'll bet that as we move forward in time that will slowly be replaced with a much more reasonable and healthy look (heavier).
I know exactly what you're talking about Loreleila. I have a gigantic penis and people are always discriminating against me because of it. I am just a person, like everybody else, why can't we all treat each other like we would want to be treated. So I have a gigantic power penis, SO WHAT. That doesn't mean I don't have feelings.
when i was younger and didn't pay as much attention to what i ate, i was heavier. i got a physically demanding job and slimmed down, and i noticed a big difference with how girls treated me... so now i pay more attention to what i eat and how i look, because i realize it makes an impression - not that it's everything, but it makes a definite difference. i weigh now at 27 what i did in middle school, and i feel much healthier, but it would be nice to not have to worry so much about it.
The way we're received by others does matter. How much is central however. If we end up totally entangled in feeling we will be received as we would wish only when we've managed to perfect our bodies then the sort of sad nonsense so prevalent now is perpetuated. It's all about balance I guess.
Nitpickery. I don't know you (yet?) but I'm sure you get the gist of what I'm saying irrespective of the terminology. The way you appear has an impact on the way you are received and responded to, and also the way you are able to function.
It's so much superficial to view a human beeing only from the outside. There is so much more. Not only the believes, the values, the thoughts, but also the beauty that comes from the inside. This can't be measured with a ideal of beauty.
Generally I'm not that vain, but starting to lose my hair before thirty is annoying. My grandfather was the same so it's a genetic thing. You won't see many balding men OF ANY AGE in adverts and on posters. Other than that I generally have the physical strength, dexterity and stamina to do what I want to do. I don't normally need to bench press 200kg or run a marathon.
Physical appearance must have a bearing of some sort, whether through ageing of some sort or looks in the broadest sense. It's easier for those who look 'good' it seems to me. Looks like you'll have to give up your ambition of modelling now then. :P
The body working well makes a huge difference, as I'm discovering with my slightly broken one (hopefully temporary).
We are the body though. It's not much of a 'suit'. I guess you mean to make a distinction between the superficial and the deeper aspects of a person's being.
What I mean is that while we have differing personalities and a common humanity the body we have and how it looks and functions at any given time has an impact on how we're perceived, how the world responds to us and how we might negotiate our way through it.
The Pope dies and goes to Heaven. Saint Peter says, "Pope, you've done your duty, you can relax now, take a wife, retire. What would you like for a mate?" Pope says, "Well, a Godly women, mature and loving". St. Peter says, "Ok, anything else?'
I've been "blessed" with a "body suit" that is pretty run of the mill, really. Ok, the feet are a bit extraordinary (I have club feet) but my orthopaedic shoes correct that for me and it doesn't affect my walking much. I've never bothered dwelling on how things might have been had they been different, it's just not my way of doing things. I guess that may explain also why I have never, ever, considered any form of body alteration, not even a tattoo. I don't even wear a watch (more).
Having said that, I HAVE of course had plenty of body alteration, albeit for medical reasons. Without it I would not be able to walk today, I would have a permanently blocked nose and ... er ... ok. No. THAT's private. XD.
exactly. When they fixed my blocked nose, the doc took it upon himself, without me asking him to do so, to elevate my septum slightly so my nose was a little less squashed looking. Thankfully it was only a tiny change and you didn't really notice it, and he did justify it by saying it would help keep my air flow free, but yeah, how far could he have taken that before it became a frivolously unnecessary thing?
I don't think there are many of us who don't have some kind of disability or other. Some are just more visible. Learning to negotiate such things can in some ways bring greater depth and therefore beauty.
It is placed on women more than men. Just watch Fox news . All of those blond knockouts. Then there is O'Rilie.
It is sad. Most people are not "beautiful" by such standards. I think it is because people are so visual in their understanding of things. Sad. We do have 4 more scences. The Voice we all hear on the phone that is a recording is made by a fat women. A very nice voice it is too.
..... I am 53yrs old , hell I guess it has worked out just fine only if I knew I was gonna live this long I would have maybe, maybe not taken better care of it... Children at least do not run when they see me yet... :)
Beauty is subjective but the media wants one way fits all that bothers me.
Well that would be a long story for me having to deal gender identity issues gives me another dimensions of alienation and strangership and discomfort to my body that few experience I mean looking in the mirror and not see ''you'' see someone who is a stranger to you. But the same time knowing how it should be more or less knowing who you are and how that is not reflected on your body.
I've noticed as I've got older that who I'm looking at in the mirror doesn't look quite like me anymore. But I do know who I am, or I am who I am, all the time, however I look.
arresting title, nice composition, and a difficult question...
in my opinion, one of the main challenges facing us, as always, is to overcome the compelling force of appearances,
for instance, even if I hold myself to be relatively free from quick judgements I automatically maintain distances from the ""unpleasant"" appearances that I encounter,
the sense of right proportions and harmony of shapes, as you say, in a sense enslave us to adhere to a hierarchic ideology of skin-politics,
Brilliant video :)
InBohemia 11 months ago
@InBohemia Thanks :)
Loreleila 11 months ago
I think the most detrimental effect of it all is that it robs young confident girls of their subjective center at some point in early adolescents and only the strongest find a way to take it back...I think that is become true of boys too...in some ways. But we have the numbers and you can see it happen to the daughters...only those lucky enough to have REALLY grounded females and males in their lives seem to get past it in tact...
CityzenJane 1 year ago
@CityzenJane I'm sure you're right. It seems to be happening increasingly with boys. It's like a disease.
Loreleila 1 year ago
Guys have definitely been getting it hard over the last handful of years in this department (no pun intended). Just look at the explosion of the penis enlargement market which has capitalized on the fears of 'inadequacy' in countless men, and I don't see it stopping there; once an actual safe and viable way to enlarge the penis is introduced - wow - there's going to be an even stronger flow of $ in that direction.
Adrian101882 2 years ago
To put it in a slightly different perspective, just ask yourself this: who wants to settle for being just 'average'?
The concept of 'averageness', of 'mediocrity', usually does not sit very well in other areas (i.e. profession, scholastic endeavors, money making etc.), so why wouldn't that mentality cross over to our physical looks as well?
We live in an age of excess: excess success, excess food, excess money, excess power - it's an infection which, sadly, leaves no cultural stone unturned.
Adrian101882 2 years ago
@Adrian101882 What about being unique rather than a clone?
'We live in an age of excess: excess success, excess food, excess money, excess power - it's an infection which, sadly, leaves no cultural stone unturned'
Exactly. Take a look at my latest video, its relevant: watch?v=jEfW1ft4Q-U
Incidentally, sorry it's taken me so long to reply. YT has just informed me of your comments. I'm not sure why it took them 2 months :S
Loreleila 1 year ago
@Adrian101882 Explosion? I assure you, while the advertising of spurious supplements and prosthetics may have increased in recent years, the market for such things has been going strong for at least decades.
Maxdwolf 1 year ago
its not as simple as being thankful for how we happen to be or celebrating our uniqueness. looking good is an ancient concept whereby those whom culture defined as good looking were the most successful. fat people are often unhealthy and will not live as long, ugly people stand less chance of finding a mate and breeding; sad facts. sight is the primary sense through which we percieve things, making image important. cultural norms change over time, its not fascism its cultural evolution....
sholto7 2 years ago 2
"why can't we celebrate the way we happened to be....or that we're unique?" because we percieve the world around us by sight, judgements are made by perceptions of this sense. fat people are unhealthy and will not live as long, ugly or odd looking people have less chance of meeting someone and spreading their genes...sad facts. trying to look good is a perfectly normal instinct born of the subconscious desire to survive, cultural tastes change with time, its not fascism its cultural evolution
sholto7 2 years ago 2
No one is going to dispute the basic principles of health and attraction. The issue is the extremes now expected and the emphasis the media place upon it, the fixation on purely physical appeal, rather than other equally imporant issues like abilities to nurture, support or good relating etc. Virtual starvation, unnatural enhancement or self loathing is certainly not healthy. This is not evolution, it's materialism wrapped up as something else.
Loreleila 2 years ago
@Loreleila
are you sure people are really pushing this? because it seems to me that people who are too fat or too skinny are looked down upon the same way someone who drinks too much is looked down upon, and the only people who try to conform to some unrealistic "perfect" look (like people who get plastic surgery for example) seem to have massive insecurity issues and people know that in most cases it doesn't even look good
andretheking86 1 year ago
It's insecurity they feed on.
Loreleila 1 year ago
who feeds on the insecurity?
andretheking86 1 year ago
Those who stand to profit from it.
Loreleila 1 year ago
true
andretheking86 1 year ago
You know how I feel from my recent video... thank you for posting this.
I definitely do not treat my body with the respect it deserves.
determineninz 2 years ago
You're welcome. I do hope you find a way to treat it with more respect. :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
Interesting. I'm sure I could site many instances where the way I look has been an advantage or disadvantage. I'm a pretty slim guy and I'm sure I've been on the receiving end of violence in the past simply because I'm an easy target in people's eyes. That would be a disadvantage naturally. While acquiring the affection of another person in a romantic sense is often, unfortunately, down to their view of your physical appearance. Personally people's appearances don't impress me. Rob x
Jadabh3 2 years ago
While theres a certain natural tendency to be attracted to someone who appears healthy and so on, I do think we can get beyond the obsession with appearance which is rammed down our throats.
Thanks for your thoughts. :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
I certainly agree and I'd like to think it's an obsession I don't buy into. Thank you for the video dude. It is a fascinating subject. Rob x
Jadabh3 2 years ago
Damn it my comments are in reverse. lol.
It'll be all the rage in few months just you wait!
:o)
Gary
smartbluecat 2 years ago
Haha. Actualy, from where I'm looking at them they're all the right way round. :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
Wonderful video. Yeah I think most of what I want to say has already been touched upon in other comments. Having vitiligo has been an interesting journey though. I remember clearly what it was like before it was noticeable and every year I can see a marked difference in the way I'm treated by strangers depending on how much of a tan I have. You can be at ease with how you look but even then you need to have strategies to deal with those who are not.
smartbluecat 2 years ago
suspicions of what we don't understand and wild assumptions can make life emotionally treacherous for the person being judged, be it someone's weight or an uncommon genetic anomaly. If vitiligo was as common as freckles it wouldn't be an issue. You can't after all do more sit ups to get rid of your freckles.
smartbluecat 2 years ago
People carrying extra weight is common however, and maybe because we're endlessly assaulted by images of size zeros and exercise tips it's considered acceptable to judge heavier strangers and ourselves. Our bodies arent fashion, yet we try to sell physical types, physical ideals as if they are. Wait a few years and you may be in vogue or an out dated fad.
smartbluecat 2 years ago
It amazes me that so many can't see this. That they get sucked into the myth of being in vogue or that looking a certain way is the only acceptable way to be. Though as you point out, that will change, and then you've had it. It's like the carrot on a stick.
Loreleila 2 years ago
You're in a relatively unusual position, being able to see the differing response to you as your condition develops. In some ways we all have similar through ageing, or potential other issues, but that's much slower and so I guess easier to get your head around. I sometimes wonder if we were all a bit more childlike and didn't feel so uncomfortable about asking questions it might help. Mind you, that could get infuriating as well. Do the reactions have much impact on how you feel about yourself?
Loreleila 2 years ago
And how has peoples reactions changed? Sorry, don't answer if you'd rather not. I can be a bit childlike myself. :P
Loreleila 2 years ago
It did at first... up until college. I think if anyone is pointed at and ridiculed day by day and if other people are hesitant about touching them it has an effect... but now I'm at ease with me and aware it's just something I have to deal with. Vitiligo has a high suicide rate because of the emotional alienation it causes. I now work with kids where the questions come thick and fast - I couldn't do a job like that if it was still a problem for me. :o)
smartbluecat 2 years ago
Thanks for explaining Gary. I'll just be one of your kids. lol
Loreleila 2 years ago
bravo, I'd say that video was the perfect weight :) The catwalk: jeez, that's pretty skinny minus the pretty in my humble opinion. The fashion industry has become so unsubtle in it's misguided values that it's just kinda displaying it's rotten goods with pride. They may as well have a barf bucket at the end of the runway, maybe incorporate some drug taking and weigh-ins into the routine. Fashion aside, life can seem cruel, finding context to no longer feel a victim is probably good thing :)
thetubemeister 2 years ago
Thanks :) And all thoughts agreed with.
Loreleila 2 years ago
My father nicknamed me G-nomm and 50 years on I realised it was in God's name!
I kid you not
Edmundo400 2 years ago
Enigmatic as ever Ed.
Loreleila 2 years ago
if there was a positive representation in the media of all shapes and sizes it would of made a huge difference to me i think i would of enjoyed my body more if there were real women to look up to rather than impossible body types which became my role models when i was young which only gave me an eating disorder and made me misserable
curvygirl1123 2 years ago
Indeed. While there seems some small attempt in the media to shift this it still encourages obsession with appearance rather than celebration of our unique selves in all their aspects.
Loreleila 2 years ago
the lucky big tits thumbnail =equals lots of veiws enough said i think.x
popebenadict16 2 years ago
I can see you might have thought that. That got me 5 million views on another video. lol. But this time it's different. Several people have sent this out because they wanted it seen. It's got me quite a lot of subscriptions as well.
Loreleila 2 years ago
i know that.the fact is the 5 million people didnt watch it for the need to learn about breast cancer,or making sand castles.x
popebenadict16 2 years ago
And revealed it needs to be, but all these issues like overweight, underweight, beauty, what have you, these are all just superficial and unpersonal opinions that echo on and on until they become clichés. No one ever really reaches out to someone right? Everybody loves to talk about these topics along with Kate Moss, how come? But I don't know what I'm getting at and maybe this all sounds like gibberish again.
F00dTube 2 years ago
What you say never sounds like gibberish. You do sound very cynical though. Sometimes a tiny spark can make huge changes. I'd rather continue to try anyway, than say 'whats the point?'.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Well I can be cynical. If you ask me we are living in a dark time and I'm not talking about financial issues or terrorism. But I am not cynical person. I think I'm a minority in believing that we can actually evolve, emancipate. At least the top 40% of the society , that are actually able to think. I have the feeling that most people tend to think that it is as it is and try to take care of their own things not thinking beyond that scope.
F00dTube 2 years ago
More than likely.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Great video. very well said :)
andymooseman 2 years ago
Thanks. :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
I think I can say that the term fascism is in this context a misnomer. (never used that word before :) ) But what is the plan here? Should we prohibit too skinny models? You always make inarguable(non-disagreeable) points, about phenomena that nobody can do a thing about. Let's conclude this again that if you bring up your children properly and conscientiously , they will be able to make the right choice and not become a: pole-dancer, gangster, anorexia-patient, terrorist.
F00dTube 2 years ago
I think fascism is the perfect word.
The plan is to raise awareness. Only when its absurdity is realised can it ever change. It's going to keep shifting anyway, only the direction is open to negotiation.
Looking for linear solutions to complex problems is not going to work. Do this and that will happen is unrealistic in this context. We shouldn't prohibit anything. Personal awareness and responsibility are key, not paternalistic thou shalt nots (every bit as bad as shoulds).
Loreleila 2 years ago
That was not at all what I was suggesting! I believe that in fact you should raise your children so they can think for themselves. So they will make the right choice. The problem is that most people are sick, mentally incapable of making choices, clinging onto ideas that are near psychotic and making it into dominating and obsessions. For instance ideas of beauty, power, wealth, etc. Sometimes valid goals but they become perverted.
F00dTube 2 years ago
Therefore the general beauty trend is not the problem. People should not be educated about magazines and the generals consensus on beauty. It can only come from within a person.
F00dTube 2 years ago
All this is true. But it is not wise to take a parental attitude. You and I are 'people' too. All these things are incredibly powerful, influence us all to a greater or lesser degree. You cannot look inside yourself for the answers if your gaze is always drawn to such things. The mirage needs to be revealed.
Loreleila 2 years ago
But the mirage is created by the person. I do not really believe in pear pressure, except for among children. People that fall for pear pressure have the same problem in the first place of not being able to think critically for themselves. They are dysfunctional. If you make them aware of one thing they'll jump to another. This is why in this communication age people are jumping around from here to there to the next fad. One thing that people refuse to look at is themselves.
F00dTube 2 years ago
i am going to get some pissed of remarks to this i know lol,... but we are attracted to thin, more athletic body's because evolution has programed us to choose the best mate, the one who will be more likely to live longer, hunt and stay healthy long enough to take care of there children, slim athletic men or women have less heart desiese, diabeties, cancer, ect,....a slim fit body is better able to survive then an obease one,..... its natural selection,...survival of the fittest,
TaNgLeD2121 2 years ago
Not at all. This video isn't about sitting around becoming fat and unhealthy, it's about the impossible 'standards' we're expected to attain and maintain, which are not only unhealthy but quite ugly, with the industry trying to seduce people into spending millions on makeup and surgical intervention they simply don't need. Most people, if they eat reasonably, exercise and listen to their own bodies, are healthy. But the demand of so called perfection is insidious, unattainable and damaging.
Loreleila 2 years ago
awesome video. long time no see, how u doing?
TheAist 2 years ago
Thanks! :) Explanation of sorts coming in the next day or so, oddly enough. How are you?
Loreleila 2 years ago
im a vegetable. i need to get motivated to make videos. im overwhelmed with ideas. i just been planted watching. This was a great video tho, really makes me think. ive thought of this type of thing before, but never heard anyone talk about it.
TheAist 2 years ago
lol I think sometimes it's good not to make them, take a break, step back. I'm sure once you start there'll be no stopping you. Glad you enjoyed this one. :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
One has to wonder if body structure is for the most part derived from our genetic makeup then can the same be said for how we perceive the world around us? Is the very discriminating nature of evaluating looks genetic or is it something learned or engrained in people's psyche's? Indoctrination or evolution?
Homie0static 2 years ago
There is an inevitability that we'll evaluate and discriminate up to a point. Obviously (given the opportunity) we're going to choose a partner who is likely to help us produce healthy offspring. The indoctrination is in what we're told is attractive (which is now unhealthy and often no more than a mask, therefore a deception) and the weight of importance of the constancy of that requirement.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Thanks so much for this video...I'm subscribed.....
My body suit has obviously affected me, because of the social conventions surrounding a plastic ideal of beauty, and I am measured up to some kind of materialistic ideal....however, I find that this quote, from an anarchist poster i was given, makes some sense :)
"Beauty must be defined as WHAT WE ARE, or else the concept itself is our enemy"
Good stuff! Peace!
danielacheson 2 years ago
Thanks. :)
Excellent quote.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Super-ficiality is the norm. Nonsense is also the norm. CO2 is too. Why ?
Why does anything that can kill either our body or our soul is now "normal" ?
Why is "magic" now "normal" ?
Why are we numb ?
Why are we dumb ?
Am I a terrorist ? :)
911allo 2 years ago
I'm not sure who you are at this point. It may well become apparent.
Loreleila 2 years ago
:)
I am just an average human who believes in God. Look at my videos, they speak by themselves. I don't know many who denounce Icke, Jones, the Pope, Bush and Zionist false Jews at the same time :)
I don't hold the truth, I can't produce it either. I just reverse-engineer some lies, just a few.
911allo 2 years ago
Ok :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
Just to joke a bit here... which picture represents you the best on this video ? :)
I like your accent, it sounds expensive lolll
Truly I love british humor :)
I can't stand the BBC though :)
this planet is too strange :)
911allo 2 years ago
lol Good question. The last one.
Thanks Haha
This planet, or rather some of its inhabitants, are truly bizarre.
Loreleila 2 years ago
My experience of living in my body has not been pleasant. I've suffered from a profoundly negative self-image since I was a little boy and been suicidal since my teens. As I approach 40 it's only getting worse and I wonder how or why I'm still here. I've had only a few friendships and no romantic relationships. I've not had so much as a friendly acquaintance in nearly a decade. My life has been devastated by my early response to the tendency of others to ridicule those they deem imperfect.
tmtomhx 2 years ago
I really appreciate your sharing this, and I don't imagine it was easy to do so. If more people were able to break this kind of silence perhaps less people would find themselves in this unfortunate position.
I like the fact you haven't simply blamed others, but can see your own response played a part. I sincerely hope you can find a way to break through this and find people with whom you can relate.
Loreleila 2 years ago
If someone wants to be one way or another, that's fine by me.. If they're happy. But I do not buy the genetics argument for fat. If I took a person genetically dispositioned to be heavy and put them on a tropical island where they had to hunt their own food, that genetics will quickly melt away.
carm3d 2 years ago
Not entirely, there are three body types. The endomorph is most likely to be rotund and to store a lot of fat. This is the person who will struggle to lose weight and find it easy to put it on. But of course intake plays a significant part.
Loreleila 2 years ago
I wonder how much struggling to loose weight actually happens.. Do they get up off the couch to struggle? Do they break a sweat? Anybody can change their metabolism with exercise and food management. Most people are not educated about which kinds of foods effect us. Sorry, I'm not sold.
carm3d 2 years ago 2
I'm not sure that's relevant unless you're close to someone who claims such a struggle and are therefore impacted by it. If we were all to look to ourselves rather than judging others and what they should or should not be maybe body fascism would not be able to be perpetuated quite so much.
Loreleila 2 years ago
I have big friends.. Does that make it relavant? I suggest alternative diets for them but they either don't have the willpower to stray from the comfort foods which tinker with their pleasure centers, or they just don't want to eat food they can't taste (as their taste buds are hopelessly numbed by the constant barrage of salts & fats). If one gets up off their backside and starts working out, and regulate their diets, they will lose weight, no matter what they believe their propensities are.
carm3d 2 years ago
Another reason is economic. Crap food is cheap. Healthy food with more protein than carbs is expensive.
carm3d 2 years ago
You make some relevant points. Weight and the whole psychology of eating is complex. Yes, if you eat less you will lose weight, it's not rocket science. But many people with weight issues are in denial, or using food to suppress their emotions, or unable to see how serious the consequences of their eating might be, or in an addictive cycle. You can make food taste good with herbs and spices, taste is something of an excuse as well. But ultimately, you can tell your friends till you''re (more)
Loreleila 2 years ago
blue in the face, if they if they don't want to do it they won't.
Loreleila 2 years ago
@Loreleila One more thing.. It's not strictly "Eat less to lose weight" either.. I eat alot of food. But it's quality food, and I lift weights. The more muscle tissue you have the more calories you burn, even at rest.
carm3d 2 years ago
@Loreleila One friend of mine was able to dismiss all of my points about diet and the health hazards of his weight until I said one thing. He is putting himself at risk of a stroke. But even that wasn't a catalyst for his change. He started getting chest pains. Turns out it was just acid reflux but he thought it was more serious and even after learning it was reflux he began to change his ways and has been losing weight. Albeit slowly. The only exercise he does is walking.
carm3d 2 years ago
@Loreleila (Cont.) but you are correct, they will not change until they are fully ready and willing to do so. In MOST cases, it is best to teach by example.
carm3d 2 years ago
@carm3d: I agree. Most people are fat for the simple reason that they eat too much and are not active. The modern lifestyle is not condusive to good health and many have become too lazy to do anything about it. Like it or not it is still all about calories for the vast population.
auggiedoggy 2 years ago
@auggiedoggy I believe that was my original point. :)
carm3d 2 years ago
we are still evolving and apparently fugly fat people should disappear from the face of the earth
pinochet222 2 years ago
we are still evolving and apparently stupid and ignorant people like yourself should disappear from the face of the earth.
DanMorgan98 2 years ago
don't hate the messenger, fugly fat shit ...
pinochet222 2 years ago
Don't hate the messenger, ignorant stupid asshole.
DanMorgan98 2 years ago
Why would I be stupid or ignorant for stating a fact? I didn't invent nature this way, I'm just observing the reality here!
That's why I'm saying I'm just the messenger, when you gotta go - you gotta go, fatshit, I'm sorry.
pinochet222 2 years ago
You answered your own question. You are stupid and ignorant, a very bad combination of idiotic traits. Remember to tie your shoes before you leave your trailer today, asshole.
DanMorgan98 2 years ago
Ok, try to insult me if it makes you feel better, please ... Your fat, ugly genes won't be around for too long anyway.
pinochet222 2 years ago
How about this. Make an insult and I will rank you on a scale from 1 to 10. 1 being the lowest on the scale and 10 being the highest on the scale and the score reserved for the best insults. Come up with 5 insults that are creative, original and funny and we will see how you rank. Good luck, i'll be rooting for you.
DanMorgan98 2 years ago
Too bad I'm not the one here with the urgent need to pointlessly insult random people over the internet.
LOL what a pathetic, complicated scheme to somehow get back at me!
You clownish piece of shit, just get the fuck out of here cause it's gonna get only worse for you....
pinochet222 2 years ago
@ pinochet222 & DanMorgan98 does this have any relevance to the topic at hand? If it doesn't maybe you'd like to go and bicker elsewhere.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Comment removed
DanMorgan98 2 years ago
I'm not the one who's trying here, you desperate dolt.
Out of respect for Loreleila's request I'll let you go this time.
Now you can relax, the grave danger is gone, you don't have to battle suicidal thoughts and take more advils or xanaxes today. Take it as a Christmas present to all fugly fatshits...
pinochet222 2 years ago
You scored a 1 again. Your insults are lame and boring. Come on, give me some real original insults that are creative in funny. I'll give you another chance. Go ahead.
DanMorgan98 2 years ago
I know, Dan, pretending and denial is the only way to consume reality for weak, pathetic people.
You can stop playing the game now, Dan.
The shitstorm is gone, due to my generosity, your battle-thorn, pwned asshole is still semi-functional.
Take care, and don't cross my way next time, you wuss.
Bye.
pinochet222 2 years ago
Fail. You get a zero this time since you have failed to impress me. Com on, try again idiot.
DanMorgan98 2 years ago
Would you like me to block you?
Loreleila 2 years ago
I agree with you on many things you said in the video but I think there is something to consider. I know that every human being has a different body structure but to be obesse and say thats the way it is is just wrong because that is not healthy. I know a couple of people in real life who are a litlle overweight and perfectly healthy but when i see those people who have like 200kg and say that they are comfortable i just can't understand. You shoul try to be more healthier and not thiner.
nikodormius 2 years ago
I'm not suggesting we should all indulge ourselves to whatever extreme suits us. In a way that's almost a reaction against being told how to be anyway. But if we were to listen to our own bodies and their needs without getting hung up on what we're told to be I suspect we'd all be much healthier.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Some of those pictures were pretty hardcore. I'm gonna have nightmares about starving women.
EpifanesEuergetes 2 years ago
You obviously don't look at womens magazines. Very wise.
Loreleila 2 years ago
People are attracted to attractive people. That's the bottom line. It's not just "sex sells", its "attractive sells". SOOOO many girls I know like and dislike performers of all types based on how attractive the guy is. I'ts ALWAYS been this way...it's how we are wired.
So with that in mind we should concentrate less on teaching children to "look on the inside, not just the outside" and concentrate more on teaching parents how to instill great self esteem and a positive self image in their kids
PhilCommander2 2 years ago
Continued...
So I believe its about educating parents. society will always place importance on looks...thats why women like guys in suits and uniforms and thats why we dress up for job interviews and "look our best". But if a child has great self esteem they will hopefully focus on their positive attributes (physical or otherwise) and accept that they arent perfect and accept it. Trying to better oneself is fine if it is for yourself and not for others.
GREAT video.
PhilCommander2 2 years ago
Continued...
My body suit has worked out ok for me...some girls find me attractive and some don't. I never think about it really...I like lifting weights because it is fun for me and it helped me get a decent body...but it was for me and not others.
I look in the mirror and see a guy staring back at me...its that simple. All guys look the same to me really...but thats cause I'm a guy...women can see a difference but most guys can't.
PhilCommander2 2 years ago
If you're happy with what you see before you, and how it works, maybe you don't need to think about it so much. Maybe having an attractive healthy body is easy, and that's what makes it attractive.
Loreleila 2 years ago
There is nothing wrong with wanting to look your best, or to be attracted to the attractive. This seems to me more about how such a thing is to be defined, because it certainly isn't what we're all pressed into feeling we should be. You're right, because if we teach our children to have self esteem because of who they are, whatever that is, they will not be so easily brainwashed.
Loreleila 2 years ago
(Continued)
Oh, and I do have weird hair growth: very little body hair, except for the top of my head(the stuff does not seem to stop growing) unlike many of my friends who are showing signs of balding. But no matter how I am perceived by other I am still shy.
P.S.
Cool video ★★★★★
Katalyzt
Katalyzt 2 years ago
That's interesting You seem to have a clear view of what is there and how it affects you. :)
Thanks
Loreleila 2 years ago
Externally my particular "bodysuit" turned out average. I have a naturally muscular frame/body with an extremely high metabolism; which affords me the luxury of not gaining weight based on the junk I eat. The drawback, is that I am almost always hungry. :O/ Though I am on average, kind of short(only 5'7) for a man, but so far I am not physically limited because of my height.
Katalzyt
Katalyzt 2 years ago
Thankyou : )
My suit is a bit broken, a lot broken... I know I felt better when I was a bit smaller and so i often think I should lose a few pounds for that reason. I don't feel bad about that but there is another reason I do feel pressure to lose weight, even when doing so is very very hard for me... to look better, to have more choices of clothing, to not have a double chin... when I have those moments I am as you say a slave to this limited notion and it hurts.
theqmogvlogs 2 years ago
:) You're welcome.
It's a hard balance to find I think. To learn to listen to what feels the best way for us to be without either trying to please or spit in the eye of those who decree such limits.
Loreleila 2 years ago
It's all about selling us something, sex sells. We have been sold this idea, if you look a certain way, you will be happy, you will be successful.. and unfortunately it's many times true. At least the success part is. I dream of the day it will change.
Excellent video!
Maiyanna 2 years ago
You're right, and I hope one day it will change. But it won't unless people start to say no to it. Of course because they want to sell us something, and keep selling us something, nothing is ever quite good enough either. You always have to make sure you can get or be the next best thing.
Thanks for subscribing. :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
When I was in my teens I was, at 6' 1", taller than just about every one of my peers (I think today that would be just average!!). I always looked older than I was and with long hair I resembled an IRA prisoner. Not surprisingly then I was stopped and searched quite a bit by the security forces and recieved my fair share of thumpings. Now as I get older I recocgnise that I get my hair colour gene from my father's side (hardly a grey hair) but unfortunately get my hairline from my mother's side!
ballyboneman 2 years ago
I've heard similar before. Being a certain colour or wearing a certain type of clothing apparently earns people a lack of trust or to give others the feeling they have the right to do them harm. Assumptions are dangerous things.
I've been pretty lucky in what I inherited from my parents. My goodness it could have been a disaster. lol
Loreleila 2 years ago
Good video, Loreleila. I don't think that the body should be an issue that is either obsessed or celebrated. It simply ought to be acknowleged, then to move on. There already is a celebration of the body as it is, which is the celebration of "life". It is that celebration which even though people may not be pleased with their looks, and even to prefer to look differently. For the most part, it doesn't usually take away the pride of their life, in terms of being alive/dead.
ArtisynSaffryn 2 years ago
People even obsess over their being alive, which relates to their use of their individual pride, in controlling other people's rights, such as the right-to-die. In the case of obsession, it causes many of those obsessed by their appearance, to be critical of others, especially critical of the disabled. People try too much to be more than they really are in nature, which are living disease-prone beings, guaranteed to die. If that realization were widely accepted, society could become much better.
ArtisynSaffryn 2 years ago
Glad you like it.
It's an interesting point you make here, that it extends to people feeling they have the right to define what choices others should be able to make, or what is or is not an acceptable way to be in many respects. It's a complete absurdity really, I'm not sure why such thinking is so prevalent. But then again it's been going for centuries, with church or state controlling peoples choices.
Loreleila 2 years ago
I'm convinced that body type has a greater influence on one's behavior than the given name...
phekwig 2 years ago
I'm sure you're right.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Great video, and one that will be received differently by different people.
Personally, i think this kind of thinking about what ones self looks like can have huge effects on peoples self confidence and then possibly their career choices, partner choices etc.
And the flip side to this whole topic is what's then appealing to an individual as well.
Like art, it is very subjective, and bound to be different depending on the person.
I think "attractive" is generally easier for the individual.
Projoiner1 2 years ago
You're right, it is being received differently, and interestingly.
I would agree with your assessment here. It has more of an impact that we imagine, yet in many ways is highly individually based. I wonder how it might be if we were all encouraged to find our own unique way of being in a physical sense, rather than conforming to whatever the media decrees.
Loreleila 2 years ago
That media can be a real pain in the ass, the mass manipulation of our population (myself included) bugs the crap out of me.
I believe that what the media shows to be the current trend in clothing or the way to look is something that is always in flux.
Currently there seems to be an obsession with thinness that defies logic, and I'll bet that as we move forward in time that will slowly be replaced with a much more reasonable and healthy look (heavier).
I've never thought boney was attractive.
Projoiner1 2 years ago
I know exactly what you're talking about Loreleila. I have a gigantic penis and people are always discriminating against me because of it. I am just a person, like everybody else, why can't we all treat each other like we would want to be treated. So I have a gigantic power penis, SO WHAT. That doesn't mean I don't have feelings.
stanburdman 2 years ago
Wishful thinking methinks. lol
Loreleila 2 years ago
That actually made my night. She does make alot of good points though I will say that.
TcountDdrunkulaL 2 years ago
when i was younger and didn't pay as much attention to what i ate, i was heavier. i got a physically demanding job and slimmed down, and i noticed a big difference with how girls treated me... so now i pay more attention to what i eat and how i look, because i realize it makes an impression - not that it's everything, but it makes a definite difference. i weigh now at 27 what i did in middle school, and i feel much healthier, but it would be nice to not have to worry so much about it.
narkfly 2 years ago
Hello stranger. :)
The way we're received by others does matter. How much is central however. If we end up totally entangled in feeling we will be received as we would wish only when we've managed to perfect our bodies then the sort of sad nonsense so prevalent now is perpetuated. It's all about balance I guess.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Body suit that I have been gifted?
My body is not a suit, I am the body.
My brain is part of my body, and the brain is the seat and source of consciousness, without my body, I do not exist.
And who "gave" me this suit exactly? whoever it was did they have a whole rack of them? do they let you return it if you keep the receipt?
I ask because I need an exchange, mine is damaged, it has a crack on the backside!
Giradius 2 years ago
Out of which you are speaking? :P
Nitpickery. I don't know you (yet?) but I'm sure you get the gist of what I'm saying irrespective of the terminology. The way you appear has an impact on the way you are received and responded to, and also the way you are able to function.
Loreleila 2 years ago
It's so much superficial to view a human beeing only from the outside. There is so much more. Not only the believes, the values, the thoughts, but also the beauty that comes from the inside. This can't be measured with a ideal of beauty.
AutumnPerception 2 years ago
I agree.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Generally I'm not that vain, but starting to lose my hair before thirty is annoying. My grandfather was the same so it's a genetic thing. You won't see many balding men OF ANY AGE in adverts and on posters. Other than that I generally have the physical strength, dexterity and stamina to do what I want to do. I don't normally need to bench press 200kg or run a marathon.
yeahwotevaman 2 years ago
Physical appearance must have a bearing of some sort, whether through ageing of some sort or looks in the broadest sense. It's easier for those who look 'good' it seems to me. Looks like you'll have to give up your ambition of modelling now then. :P
The body working well makes a huge difference, as I'm discovering with my slightly broken one (hopefully temporary).
Loreleila 2 years ago
We are the body though. It's not much of a 'suit'. I guess you mean to make a distinction between the superficial and the deeper aspects of a person's being.
yeahwotevaman 2 years ago
What I mean is that while we have differing personalities and a common humanity the body we have and how it looks and functions at any given time has an impact on how we're perceived, how the world responds to us and how we might negotiate our way through it.
Loreleila 2 years ago
The Pope dies and goes to Heaven. Saint Peter says, "Pope, you've done your duty, you can relax now, take a wife, retire. What would you like for a mate?" Pope says, "Well, a Godly women, mature and loving". St. Peter says, "Ok, anything else?'
Pope says, "Oh, yes, big tits."
owheydusoapsk 2 years ago
lol!
Loreleila 2 years ago
LOL but then he would only be being true to scripture which instructs husbands to delight in their wife's breasts. Poverbs 5:19
ballyboneman 2 years ago
At 51 years .
I'm still OK.
michaelispan 2 years ago
I'm glad to hear it. :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
humans are funny in some ways. our society places pressure on all of us... some of us a strong enough to resist the message...
peaCe2U...
IChoseTheRedPill 2 years ago
Humans are very peculiar.
Loreleila 2 years ago
I've been "blessed" with a "body suit" that is pretty run of the mill, really. Ok, the feet are a bit extraordinary (I have club feet) but my orthopaedic shoes correct that for me and it doesn't affect my walking much. I've never bothered dwelling on how things might have been had they been different, it's just not my way of doing things. I guess that may explain also why I have never, ever, considered any form of body alteration, not even a tattoo. I don't even wear a watch (more).
rozeboosje 2 years ago
Having said that, I HAVE of course had plenty of body alteration, albeit for medical reasons. Without it I would not be able to walk today, I would have a permanently blocked nose and ... er ... ok. No. THAT's private. XD.
rozeboosje 2 years ago
Seeking intervention to make oneself functional is rather different. Though theres a whole debate about just where you draw the line on that too.
Loreleila 2 years ago
exactly. When they fixed my blocked nose, the doc took it upon himself, without me asking him to do so, to elevate my septum slightly so my nose was a little less squashed looking. Thankfully it was only a tiny change and you didn't really notice it, and he did justify it by saying it would help keep my air flow free, but yeah, how far could he have taken that before it became a frivolously unnecessary thing?
rozeboosje 2 years ago
.... Was your nickname penguin in grade school... :) ... Did you waddle or toddle...
Mrwrinkleintime 2 years ago
Nope. It was "battlefeet" due to the fact that orthopaedic shoes are formidable weapons XD
rozeboosje 2 years ago
I don't think there are many of us who don't have some kind of disability or other. Some are just more visible. Learning to negotiate such things can in some ways bring greater depth and therefore beauty.
Loreleila 2 years ago
It is placed on women more than men. Just watch Fox news . All of those blond knockouts. Then there is O'Rilie.
It is sad. Most people are not "beautiful" by such standards. I think it is because people are so visual in their understanding of things. Sad. We do have 4 more scences. The Voice we all hear on the phone that is a recording is made by a fat women. A very nice voice it is too.
hellavadeal 2 years ago
It is sad. In fixating on these things we can lose so much richness.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Yes indeed.
rozeboosje 2 years ago
lookup "body modification" on youtube or on the net.
Jihunn 2 years ago
I know of it.
Loreleila 2 years ago
..... I am 53yrs old , hell I guess it has worked out just fine only if I knew I was gonna live this long I would have maybe, maybe not taken better care of it... Children at least do not run when they see me yet... :)
Mrwrinkleintime 2 years ago
When we're young we don't realise our actions will have consequences, but then I think that's part of the deal. The joy of living..
Loreleila 2 years ago
bit like that dying girl in that car.x
popebenadict16 2 years ago
Indeed. Unfortunately it was too late for her.
Loreleila 2 years ago
Beauty is subjective but the media wants one way fits all that bothers me.
Well that would be a long story for me having to deal gender identity issues gives me another dimensions of alienation and strangership and discomfort to my body that few experience I mean looking in the mirror and not see ''you'' see someone who is a stranger to you. But the same time knowing how it should be more or less knowing who you are and how that is not reflected on your body.
Eopyk 2 years ago
Part 2 : I wish I could give a deep explanation but I just don't think I can do it in a comment section with 500 gaps.
All love from me Jasmine
Eopyk 2 years ago
Maybe you could make a video response. :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
I've noticed as I've got older that who I'm looking at in the mirror doesn't look quite like me anymore. But I do know who I am, or I am who I am, all the time, however I look.
Loreleila 2 years ago
arresting title, nice composition, and a difficult question...
in my opinion, one of the main challenges facing us, as always, is to overcome the compelling force of appearances,
for instance, even if I hold myself to be relatively free from quick judgements I automatically maintain distances from the ""unpleasant"" appearances that I encounter,
the sense of right proportions and harmony of shapes, as you say, in a sense enslave us to adhere to a hierarchic ideology of skin-politics,
almafarag 2 years ago
Thanks.
Yes, it's easy to claim lack of prejudice but in reality we do tend to find ourselves more drawn to the physically attractive.
Loreleila 2 years ago
i like my suit,six foot four and the constitution of an ox it,s smashing :)
you know what,s intersting every one of us
is result of a lineage of creatures that have successfully reproduced since the
year dot.....not a single failure dver billions of years
lapislazuline 2 years ago
Sounds lovely :P
It is interesting. All, in our own bizarre way, a success story.
Loreleila 2 years ago
and yet i can,t even spell "over" :)
lapislazuline 2 years ago
The fact you're around is clearly a miracle ;P
Loreleila 2 years ago
it is! i,m one of these awful people who just float through life like a piece of seaweed and yet everything seems to
go along tikkity-boo....i think probably fate
is a reality what will be will be however much we struggle and strive
lapislazuline 2 years ago
Very perceptive....
2bsirius 2 years ago
Thanks :)
Loreleila 2 years ago
I couldn't stop thinking about this video...I'm going to feature it on my channel in the hopes that that might mean a few more people will watch it.
It is rare to find a video which provokes thoughtful responses on YouTube...This one does that.
2bsirius 2 years ago