What he did was totally unacceptable, and it should be a tort for which he should be sued, if not a criminal offense. He committed a crime against you worse than a "child molester," and you certainly suffered far, far more than any victim of rape, because you LOST 3 months --- that is 1 / 75 of your total reproductive life. If more guys did that, you are going to wind up childless ---- a PERMANENT, physical disability, and suffer far greater emotional turmoil than any victim of rape.
@mooninquirer Really, if you ever have a child with Down's syndrome, then you SHOULD be allowed to sue him for contributory negligence. He should have told straight up front that he was not attracted to you, and not have mislead you. You could have gone out with other guys, and gotten married in that time. Quite frankly, I think 3 months is too long for a woman of your age to allow a man an engagement period without him marrying you, even if she met him while being a working escort.
@darcievany Pretty sure, eh ? Well, I am ABSOLUTELY sure that the offense he committed was greater than rape, and it is QUALITATIVELY more similar to someone who murders and tortures a child just for the sense of power, and just for the pleasure of watching him die. It is like the power Donald Trump gets from shouting, "You're fired !"
He intended to dump you from day one, and he gets a lot of power and pleasure out of doing so, and is going to do the same thing to other women.
@mooninquirer Although Donald Trump gets a lot of satisfaction, what he does is not QUANTITATIVELY comparable to the harm inflicted upon you, because he has just a reality TV show, and even in real life, a boss has the right to fire employees, especially because they have that understanding from the beginning. This INDIVIDUAL who dumped you had an understanding with you that it WAS a serious, romantic date, and incorporated in that understanding is that he was physically attracted to you.
I don't mean to be Captain Obvious here, but the guy is gay! FD, If you're ever in St. Louis, give me a holler. I'll definitely let you buy me a drink. : )
Three months? No intimacy? Hell no. What took YOU so long to find out what was going on? One marathon date and there should be some intimacy or 3 - 4 regular dates. What man would go out with a pretty woman for three months and not so much as kiss her one the cheek?
Hey may have been a super nice guy and didn't want to dump you in order to avoid hurting your feelings, though.
"How long does it take to feel chemistry or know it exists?" I agree with you. It's like 2 dates tops! If it takes any longer than that, 'he's just not that into you.'
"Do I think it was fair that he strung you along?"
The short answer is no but I have to agree with the guys below: What the heck took YOU so long? If you made yourself very clear and he didn't respond, then 'he's just not that into you.'
This makes absolutely no sense to me @ all. 3 months of "marathon dates" and no action?!? Good grief! And who the heck are these male friends of yours that say they don't think that's a long time? Maybe they do things differently up there in Canadaland, but that crap wouldn't fly in America. And not just to talk about him, but what about YOU? Why did it take 3 months for YOU to make a move?
I mean, I know you've said you prefer aggressive men, so I guess I could understand you waiting a couple of dates for him to make the first move, but after a few dates, if you were still interested, you should have taken the first step yourself, not just keep waiting.
This makes me wish, like I've said before, that I could see you in action, to see for myself exactly what it is that you may be doing wrong. Because I just can't see how you could spend 6-8 hours with someone that you like, especially more than once, without any kind of flirtation going on, which should lead to physical action. Are you sure these were real "dates"? Did this guy all along think that you were just hanging out as platonic friends?
They were definately dates. We called them that anyway. I did everything to show that he would get a positive reaction if he made a move. One of the big problems was that he liked day-dates. Day dates are really hard. By the time the date is done, it's still light out. They were really good dates though...which may have been the problem. He was really great to talk to, and we had a lot in common.
Yes, I could have made a move sooner, but I thought he was taking it slow because he liked me and didn't want to screw up. The idea that he didn't like me didn't even occur to me.
What he did was totally unacceptable, and it should be a tort for which he should be sued, if not a criminal offense. He committed a crime against you worse than a "child molester," and you certainly suffered far, far more than any victim of rape, because you LOST 3 months --- that is 1 / 75 of your total reproductive life. If more guys did that, you are going to wind up childless ---- a PERMANENT, physical disability, and suffer far greater emotional turmoil than any victim of rape.
mooninquirer 6 months ago
@mooninquirer Really, if you ever have a child with Down's syndrome, then you SHOULD be allowed to sue him for contributory negligence. He should have told straight up front that he was not attracted to you, and not have mislead you. You could have gone out with other guys, and gotten married in that time. Quite frankly, I think 3 months is too long for a woman of your age to allow a man an engagement period without him marrying you, even if she met him while being a working escort.
mooninquirer 6 months ago
@mooninquirer I'm pretty sure you shouldn't compare this experience with rape.
darcievany 5 months ago
@darcievany Pretty sure, eh ? Well, I am ABSOLUTELY sure that the offense he committed was greater than rape, and it is QUALITATIVELY more similar to someone who murders and tortures a child just for the sense of power, and just for the pleasure of watching him die. It is like the power Donald Trump gets from shouting, "You're fired !"
He intended to dump you from day one, and he gets a lot of power and pleasure out of doing so, and is going to do the same thing to other women.
mooninquirer 5 months ago
@mooninquirer Although Donald Trump gets a lot of satisfaction, what he does is not QUANTITATIVELY comparable to the harm inflicted upon you, because he has just a reality TV show, and even in real life, a boss has the right to fire employees, especially because they have that understanding from the beginning. This INDIVIDUAL who dumped you had an understanding with you that it WAS a serious, romantic date, and incorporated in that understanding is that he was physically attracted to you.
mooninquirer 5 months ago
He may have met someone else or you may have run across a red flag he has. For example bad in bed or super religious
cavmanier 1 year ago
I don't mean to be Captain Obvious here, but the guy is gay! FD, If you're ever in St. Louis, give me a holler. I'll definitely let you buy me a drink. : )
ptelligence 1 year ago
Three months? No intimacy? Hell no. What took YOU so long to find out what was going on? One marathon date and there should be some intimacy or 3 - 4 regular dates. What man would go out with a pretty woman for three months and not so much as kiss her one the cheek?
Hey may have been a super nice guy and didn't want to dump you in order to avoid hurting your feelings, though.
dabanditisback 1 year ago
Hey Darcie,
To answer your questions:
"How long does it take to feel chemistry or know it exists?" I agree with you. It's like 2 dates tops! If it takes any longer than that, 'he's just not that into you.'
"Do I think it was fair that he strung you along?"
The short answer is no but I have to agree with the guys below: What the heck took YOU so long? If you made yourself very clear and he didn't respond, then 'he's just not that into you.'
I know, we're weird but you're still HOTT!
1funluvr8 1 year ago
Comment removed
jamesweston0 1 year ago
@jamesweston0 I jumped on top of him and took my shirt off. I think that's a clear indication.
darcievany 1 year ago
@jamesweston0 I jumped on top of him and took my shirt off. I thought I made myself pretty clear.
darcievany 1 year ago
@jamesweston0 I jumped on top of him and took my shirt off. I thought I made myself pretty clear.
darcievany 1 year ago
This makes absolutely no sense to me @ all. 3 months of "marathon dates" and no action?!? Good grief! And who the heck are these male friends of yours that say they don't think that's a long time? Maybe they do things differently up there in Canadaland, but that crap wouldn't fly in America. And not just to talk about him, but what about YOU? Why did it take 3 months for YOU to make a move?
JRLeMar1 1 year ago
I mean, I know you've said you prefer aggressive men, so I guess I could understand you waiting a couple of dates for him to make the first move, but after a few dates, if you were still interested, you should have taken the first step yourself, not just keep waiting.
JRLeMar1 1 year ago
This makes me wish, like I've said before, that I could see you in action, to see for myself exactly what it is that you may be doing wrong. Because I just can't see how you could spend 6-8 hours with someone that you like, especially more than once, without any kind of flirtation going on, which should lead to physical action. Are you sure these were real "dates"? Did this guy all along think that you were just hanging out as platonic friends?
JRLeMar1 1 year ago
@JRLeMar1
They were definately dates. We called them that anyway. I did everything to show that he would get a positive reaction if he made a move. One of the big problems was that he liked day-dates. Day dates are really hard. By the time the date is done, it's still light out. They were really good dates though...which may have been the problem. He was really great to talk to, and we had a lot in common.
darcievany 1 year ago
@JRLeMar1
Yes, I could have made a move sooner, but I thought he was taking it slow because he liked me and didn't want to screw up. The idea that he didn't like me didn't even occur to me.
darcievany 1 year ago