When I Get Home PSA - Teens in Foster Care

[globalhealth4]

I have been abused and neglected in childhood. I acted out with my parents. The only thing that helped me was my Grandmother PRAYING EVERYDAY! Thank God! And I had issues of unforgiveness, anger, drugs, and etc. Now, that I have grown and matured through alot with Christ on my side, I am going to open a transiting home for the teens who never get a permanent home. cause I know if your never placed then your released at 18yrs with no where to go right? Please EMAIL me and let me know ur thougts!

[globalhealth4]

Ok hey everyone that made a comment..most of you have been in the system for a while seems like. I KNOW there is a will for all of you. Please don't be discouraged. God thinks the best of you and wants the best of you. And don't think that if God is real then why did He let this happen to me? That is a common deciet to get you guys off track spiritually. God loves us all. And please don't ever think that those or us that have homes or who have never been in FC have had great lives! We haven't!

[elliebabe155]

My Message below, What do you think about it? Is it true that if you foster a teen they bring Trouble? I dont expect it to be a walk through the Park but please read my question Below and reply to me. Thankyou all xx

[samidancer295]

and ended up telling everyone she had 4 sons and if she had a daughter she didnt know she existed. which would be me... and the fact she got pregnant while she was drunk on a one night stand so no one knows who my biological father is. but you know what. life goes on. no matter how much it sucks. you were given a life. so be thankful for it. for the many children who are being killed each and everyday. don't give up hope. because miracles do happen. god bless you all.

[samidancer295]

she ended up drinking right before she gave birth to me as well as taking 5 other illegal drugs at extremely high doses. i was born 5 weeks early with all the drugs and alcohol in my system. its amazing what people can do to you. yet i thank god for her. because she also is the reason i'm alive. had she not gotten pregnant with me i wouldn't be where i am today. i wouldn't have been adopted. yeah it still haunts me everyday knowing she drank herself to death.

[samidancer295]

I then was put into foster care when i was 5 and a half months old. and when i was a year old i ended up being adopted by the same family. i was not old enough to remember the details. and still am not of legal age to go out and search for my biological parents. but even if i could there would be no answers to find. my biological mother wanted drug money so bad she became a prostitute. her first night selling herself she became pregnant with me. by accident.

[samidancer295]

My biological mother is dead. She was an addict and an alcoholic. She left me on the streets to sleep in the snow the day i arrived back to the trailer she considered a home every night. i was only 2 and a half weeks old. she abandoned me every weekend to go out and be a mother to my half brother that didn't know i existed.

[SpecialMom4]

I was raped at 14 & abandoned b/c I refused abortion. So WE ended up in FC after homeless shelters. I choose FC @ 16 for myself&son so I could watch& see how a REAL family is/was supposed to run. It was VERY abusive & my son was 3yrs old when I found out the FMom was ABUSING him too...

I can relate w/ the many comments here & watching these just breaks my heart. I wish I could adopt every single foster child out there!

(my son is now 14&Im29-happily married w/ 3more boys)

[whatelsebuthome]

I really appreciate reading all of your experiences with foster care. As this PSA states, this is a complicated and emotional issue that is very unique to each individual. I have my own experiences with adoption and foster care and I've posted some videos on my profile to share.

[janetteemccrary]

I'm a former foster child. I went into foster care at 6 1/2 years old. I was everything this ad says... And I never got adopted. I was raped and beaten in foster care. I had good and bad foster care homes. But the overwhelming fact is... Even the good ones left me eventually. NO one stayed.

[janetteemccrary]

I've finally gotten my case file, about a year ago, and reading through it just makes me even more angry... It seems that every foster home I was in decided to abandon me because I was "angry"... Well what the hell do you expect when you take a child away from their parents at age 6 1/2, molest, rape and beat them... And tell them THEY'RE bad for making a big deal out of it? That they made it up for attention, they lied? Even at age 6 1/2, they thought I lied about abuse!!!

[bird2374]

i know how you feel i was in foster care for 12year

[janetteemccrary]

Why the hell would I lie about being molested at ages 6 1/2 and 7? How would I even know what to say? Anyhow I feel like every child in foster care, past, present in future, is "family"... After all, we had the same legal parent... Isn't that the same as being adopted into the same family?

[janetteemccrary]

I do believe adoption has its place. I am also a parent who lost my child to the foster care system. Trust me, I wanted to avoid that. I did not lose my son because of abuse, but because I was a young parent with a sick child I did not know how to care for beyond doctor's orders. Because of my history, I did NOT want him in foster care. After two years of fighting for him, I found that there was a family waiting to adopt him.

[janetteemccrary]

I signed away my rights because I would rather give him away and know he was safe than have him RIPPED from me and have no say in his life, no way to know he was safe, no way to protect him from the abuse I endured.

[elliebabe155]

@janetteemccrary My Message I sent you, What do you think about it? Is it true that if you foster a teen they bring Trouble? I dont expect it to be a walk through the Park but please read my question Below and reply to me. Thankyou all xx

[elliebabe155]

@janetteemccrary Hi, I am Sorry to hear about your Foster Story and the Things you went through But I am sure you are an Inspiration to many overs that are and have been through the same. I am thinking of fostering a Teenage Girl And I already have a Daughter who is 14 But the Social Worker said that she doesnt really advise having a teenager as they bring troulbe some how I dont believe that I believe if you give the child Time Care Love and teach it correctly that not all teens are Bad?

[janetteemccrary]

@elliebabe155 I don't think it makes a difference if they are a child or teen... Generally, the longer a child has been in care and/or at home being abused, the more likely they are to be angry and act out. And if you are a caring person it shouldn't matter if they act out or not, you should love them anyhow. I can't believe the worker actually advised that... Now I know why I was in Group Homes and shelters more than actual homes after I turned 13!

[fenianbitch]

@elliebabe155 Hello, I am a foster parent. I have two teenagers that are my biological children, aged fourteen and fifteen. So when I decided to do foster parenting, I thought it would be easier for me to bring in a teenager. I am the proud foster mother of a fourteen year old boy. he was neglected, beat by his mother's boyfriends, exposed to lots of drug abuse and he was very angry and hurt. When he came, he had been kicked out of four homes already and totally did not trust or like us at all.

[fenianbitch]

@fenianbitch To continue, he even beat my son up once. We stuck it out and continued to treat him as our own, I could not see giving up on him. He was thirteen when he came to us and it took over a year to get through to him, that he could not push us away and we were not giving up on him, even when he acted out. He has been through so much, but this Christmas, he gave me one of the greatest gifts I ever got. he gave me a card he bought and he addressed it to 'Mom and Dad'. I cried.

[fenianbitch]

@fenianbitch Don't give up on taking in a teen, most people want small, young, cute kids. Teens can be overlooked, because they are so big and so close to adulthood and can be involved in acting out in more adult ways. but, they are still babies and need love and hugs and acceptance, especially through their harder times. To all here who have had bad experiences in foster care. I am so sorry. :( It is not right. But there are those of us who do care and do try and will not give up.

[MP1664]

I was one of those kids. The feelings of neglect, abuse, abandonment and "unloved" are all too real...even today. I was angry and wanted to "get back" at all the people who hurt me. I realized that getting back would never help me. What we can do is help them put their lives together...not only for themselves...but for others who need appropriate role models. We must help foster youth understand the reasons that it is IMPERATIVE for them to become productive, positive citizens.

[MrsAndre]

my comment was in response to jigsy61...

[jigsy61]

If a teen is just being removed for the first time {at age 12 or over) to go into foster care, don't bother. At least they are finally big enough to return the beatings and abuse that their birth parents dealt out to them for all those yrs. Sorry to say, as a foster mother of teens, it is almost impossible to parent a teen who has had no rules, been taught to steal, and who has no respect for the adults that are there to try to parent them for the first time in their life.

[Bizziboy]

....... wow am I glad you were never my foster parent...

[neemra1010]

Often their behaviors are defense mechanisms. Children learn how to defend themselves against being disappointed and deserted by adults who are supposed to love and protect them. Being left is a painful experince and foster children are all too familiar with this feeling. They are hurt and angry. They are not only abused and neglected. But once in care often are made to feel unimportant or starve for true affection, a simple hug, a kiss goodnight. Think about how their lives really are.

[MrsAndre]

OMG! What a sad and awful thing to say!

My birthparents have mental health issues. We were never beaten, but our parents didn't have the capacity to be parents. They divorced whe we were toddlers; and from the age of about 10 on we were bounced from foster home to group home, to mom, to dad, and around again when the folks flaked out.

According to your logic social services should have abandoned me. To what? Be a homeless? Prostitution? Drugs? How does a pre-teen support themselves?

[daaronad]

It's a noble idea, put forward by the agency that profits from it, but it is mostly propaganda. If you are considering to become a foster parent, do the research first. Talk to both sides, the agency that promotes becoming a foster parent and, most importantly, the families who have had their children taken from them. Talk to adults who grew up in foster care. Please, if you want to help children, keep them with their families.

[arandea]

Are you suggesting that abuse only happens in foster homes? What about the kids who are abused and even killed by their blood families? Fostering is not always the answer...but leaving them with their parents isn't always the right one either.

[gangsterrr9]

I'm in foster care right now..

[BarbaraWillis88]

hers's a revolutionary idea...leave them with their parents, unless they are one of the unfortunate few who are actually abused. That way there will be closer to enough adoptive and foster parents to care for the kids who really need it, not just the ones who have parents that could use a hand up or have been falsely acused. How about we stop ripping families appart!

[Fistandell]

This is propaganda!!! Children are being stolen and abused in this present child protection system. Hi Bizzi and afterfostercare, nice to see you x-foster children showing the true face of foster care.

[afterfostercare]

Hey bizzi, good to see you here brother. I too lived in foster care for sixteen years and was abused and emotionally neglected. Today I work to advocate for changes to child welfare. My opinion is that the child welfare services are unfortunately required in some circumstances. But when those services are applied, they should be done so compassionately and not just with an eye to winning a court case.

[vidmakr]

I know the misery of not feeling wanted. All the hugs and kisses in the world cannot replace just one warm smile from your own mother. To those who have to endure the pain of being separated from your REAL family, please know YOU ARE NOT ALONE! You do deserve and will be loved! Get yourself ready to accept it!

[Bizziboy]

Over 25 000 kids have been killed in care in the last 5 years. They died nameless and unknown. Thanks alot you heartless monsters.

[arandea]

Are you saying that all foster parents are responsible for this? Some foster carers dedicate their lives to helping in any way they can. No one is perfect. Some of them are pricks who just want the money that comes with fostering, but some are loving and kind people who want to do what they can.

[Bizziboy]

When a group of people beat down a person and some of the group did not beat him but stood and watched and did nuthing... it makes them just as guilty.... people can say what they like... but reality will always win.

[Bizziboy]

The only way to help the kids is to help their families period and only corporation seem to think this is okay. I had to get my education on the streets selling drugs so I could pay for college. When I was released out of care after being on over 13 homes I could not read or write and I was a danger to myself and everyone around me. Things have changed. I am a man. And now I fight to shut down foster care. If you really truly care about kids then you will do the same.

[vidmakr]

I'm sorry ur childhood has left you with so many scars. Myself having been abandoned and left for dead, I spent countless hours hating the situation I was in, and wishing for my mother to come rescue me. At 33 I met her for the first time. I am so thankful she did not raise me. But I hated her for not being a part of my life. NOW! I WISH I could be the parent alot of these kids need.

[Bizziboy]

Hummm.. I was in foster care. I was abused tortured. I never should have been stolen from my home. And seeing ads for adoption is like seeing ads for "KIDS FOR SALE" You people make me sick... Out of the 32 children I knew in care over the years, I can count the ones alive today on one hand. Stop stealing kids from their parents and this whole topic won't be a issue.

[oldoldmanhen]

i was a foster kid who dreamed, and because i dreamed i am now going to college. All you need is a dream, and with that you can do the impossible.

[BrantAshleeLover]

WOW, You all did a good job.

[BrantAshleeLover]

WOW, That had alot of Passion