I find these videos interesting to the extent that there are a few interesting nuggets of thought lying within a diffuse field of pop New Age psycho-babble. Internal struggles can have importance, and it seems overly facile and indolent to simply sugar-coat them, sweep them under a rug of unconditional self-acceptance, or simply dismiss them as delusions.
This is a good video but i've been having a problem with the opposite I think. I've been trying to practice letting go of my disires, but isnt it our desires that help us to grow and change into a more mature or wiser person? So how much should we embrace our desires??
@bat5jamma The source of desire is important. Desires of spirit, being, creativity, love which don't cause suffering if not met are healthy. However, most desires are based in ego, void filling, and excess.
Life sucks and happiness eludes us, and what few moments of pleasure we get only show us how empty and meaningless the rest of our existance truly is.
Internal conflict is there for a reason. ignoring it doesn't solve anything. I think it's healthier for people to take happiness from accomplishing things and overcoming some of these flaws. should a murderer, rapist or child molester not fight their illness? Or should they just accept that is who they are and be themselves? Don't say shoulda, coulda, woulda.. get off your ass and do it.. you'll revel in your accomplishment when you succeed... down 26lbs, 26 more to go and happy getting there...
This has been helping me a lot the past couple days. I always worry that I'm unproductive and I'm always complaining to myself about what I Should to and what I Shouldn't. Thank you good sir, It's a relief not worrying so much. I find if I concentrate about this too much I start losing the relief. I have to just tell myself to relax and then I take some deep breaths.
Thank you for sharing. It also helps to remember in the grand scheme of things our lives aren't that important. We are conditioned from a very young age to do, work, succeed, and produce instead of just be. Find your identity in your being instead of your doing and peace will overflow.
You are awesome Steve.. I love all your videos. this one in particular is exactly where I am in my life at this point.. I really get a lot out of listening to you speak,. Thanks for putting yourself out there!
You are so right in this too! I always felt that I had to change myself for others and that I had to please others so I could be loved. Now, I pay more attention to who I am and I am happier because I am accepting myself first and I don't spend as much time with the people that never accepted me for who I really am!
Thank you for the great lessons of life that you are sharing with all of us!
This video could not have come at a better moment. Accepting myself as I am is not my strong point, but when I hear you talk about it it feels like the only way to have peace. Just go with the flow of life without trying to row upstream. :-)
Have a nice and peacefull day and thanks again for your words.
surrendering to my 'self-judgments' does not sound that appealing to me. the evaluation "i am flawed" is an axiom that organized religion and self help book authors need to proliferate sales and salvation. acceptance of where i am at might be of benefit if it's a 'reality check' to see where i am at in my life and looking at where this process will lead me next... to find what i am needing so i find ways to get those needs met...
Good point. What we are talking about here is the neurotic destructive force which dwells on past and future. Obviously it is beneficial to learn from mistakes.
"...the neurotic destructive force which dwells on past and future." what does this mean? acceptance of "flaws" ; flaw is a judgment ; judgments are concerned with who is what ; this is a type of blame ; instead of looking at how we are responsible for our thoughts, feelings, and actions and the choices derived from conclusions based on judgments, criticisms, and evaluations (which are largely assumptions and unfounded data) ; we remain unaware of the other 99% of what's influencing us (cont.)
to make any lasting change we need to be aware of our values influencing our thoughts, feelings, and actions. accepting ourselves as fucked up is not enough or even a good place to begin! there is nothing wrong with me. though i see many things that i do that do not serve my life and relationships. i feel concerned about this and seek to understand the need to change certain habits. is the need to change coming from friends, family, society? or is it an intrinsic desire?
self empathy is powerful and imparts a deeper sense of acceptance that can be shared. slowing down long enough to actually acknowledge an emotion and our reactions allows us to shine the light of consciousness on the roots of this emotion and the need being expressed and from there we can find ways of fulfilling that need while gaining a greater understanding of who we are. not as flawed or addicted or hateful but fulfilling needs in a unhealthy way that is alienating of others and even us...
Agreed, I appreciate your exposition of the topic. Could you please give us a practical example of how someone might apply this awareness to something like alcoholism.
Our loving ourselves and allowing our own magnificence to radiate, not because of something we did to become that way, but just because we are simply because we ARE. Beings, not doings, is sweet. BECAUSE we realize who we ARE however, we DO naturally reach out to others, as you have here. The doing part to our fellow man, the giving of ourselves and our compassion and non-judgement of others is a natural extension of when we realize who we are. Then our light shines brightly with no effort.
Part of what you say I agree with and part of it I couldn't disagree more. I love this: "We are spiritual beings having a human experience, not the other way around." As such, we really are divine deep within and the spirit, NOT the ego can't NOT strive for excellence and growth. Surrendering to the realization that we are divine changes our perspective totally. "Would a daughter of God behave this way?"
Flaws and imperfections are tricky words to dissect. I choose to align my thoughts with seeing the perfection in everything, and though I explain it differently methinks you are saying the same thing...
What this means to me is that I see any and all of our creations (in our lives) as perfect in process, and if we don't like what we're creating we can TAKE RESPONSIBILITY and change our thoughts and belief patterns to reflect the life we DO wish to live!
Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda is the single most unsuccessful way to Also Trade (Stocks, options, Forex)........i guess i needed that previous xperience so i can grow!?!!?......how true Steve. Wishing u the best.
Thank you Steve. As I am reading Eckart Tolle: "The Power of Now" what you are saying make a lots of senses. It goes with what he is saying about being in the now and stop that "chit-chat" which always occupy our mind. I often have to become conscious during the day and become present and tell myself ot that other "self" inside of my mind who always says' " Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda". Shut the Fuck up..!!!! I keep telling myself. Excuse my French !
Right-on! The state of non-acceptance of anything creates suffering. Some things may be our choice to be worth the pain (e.g. I want a degree, I don't accept missing it, therefore I'll suffer for it) vs. unnecessary pain (I don't accept that I'm overweight therefore I cannot be happy, etc).
Your v-blog posts are linked on my own blog now, I want to spread this content. Keep it up man, you're nourishing a way to explain how people can just BE in daily life, NOW, to suffer less and be happier
struggles build walls and create pain. This kind of talk opens pathways. I'l add that this kind encouragement has a place in the raising of healthy children.
hi Steve, your message of self-acceptance is wonderful because once we can accept everything of ourselves, we can start accepting others' flaws & all.....also when we can pair that with self-awareness and compassion, that will help us evolve without feeling critical of ourselves. You make a good example...I used to be hard on myself for gaining wt. but then when I stopped beating myself for not exerc/dieting, I naturally led a healthier lifesty. & did exerc I enjoyed--my body changed.
Life is in the Doing. Should could and would never did anything. Exceptance is the key to my happyness today. Knowing what to change is important. The only thing I can change about someone else is my attitude towards them. Pease. Good mind you have there.
You sorta look like Keifer Sutherland. : )
robert1268 6 months ago
I find these videos interesting to the extent that there are a few interesting nuggets of thought lying within a diffuse field of pop New Age psycho-babble. Internal struggles can have importance, and it seems overly facile and indolent to simply sugar-coat them, sweep them under a rug of unconditional self-acceptance, or simply dismiss them as delusions.
Alexisme1001 1 year ago
man, these videos.... are truly SELFISH! lol keep them coming.
- a fan
Atreyul 1 year ago
@Atreyul Selfish is the path to enlightenment.
vagabondsteve 1 year ago
@vagabondsteve love is the path to enlightenment, not selfishness
James25H 7 months ago
This is a good video but i've been having a problem with the opposite I think. I've been trying to practice letting go of my disires, but isnt it our desires that help us to grow and change into a more mature or wiser person? So how much should we embrace our desires??
bat5jamma 1 year ago
@bat5jamma The source of desire is important. Desires of spirit, being, creativity, love which don't cause suffering if not met are healthy. However, most desires are based in ego, void filling, and excess.
vagabondsteve 1 year ago
Life sucks and happiness eludes us, and what few moments of pleasure we get only show us how empty and meaningless the rest of our existance truly is.
themeaningoflife38 1 year ago
Internal conflict is there for a reason. ignoring it doesn't solve anything. I think it's healthier for people to take happiness from accomplishing things and overcoming some of these flaws. should a murderer, rapist or child molester not fight their illness? Or should they just accept that is who they are and be themselves? Don't say shoulda, coulda, woulda.. get off your ass and do it.. you'll revel in your accomplishment when you succeed... down 26lbs, 26 more to go and happy getting there...
halifaxjoel 2 years ago
This has been helping me a lot the past couple days. I always worry that I'm unproductive and I'm always complaining to myself about what I Should to and what I Shouldn't. Thank you good sir, It's a relief not worrying so much. I find if I concentrate about this too much I start losing the relief. I have to just tell myself to relax and then I take some deep breaths.
thankee
de97531 2 years ago
Thank you for sharing. It also helps to remember in the grand scheme of things our lives aren't that important. We are conditioned from a very young age to do, work, succeed, and produce instead of just be. Find your identity in your being instead of your doing and peace will overflow.
vagabondsteve 2 years ago
thank you, much appreciated... it's funny how we like to battle common sense in our heads...
schpongleded 2 years ago
awesome video
AlexanderCecilia 2 years ago
Thanks!
vagabondsteve 2 years ago
Ok I just ate 2 sandwiches, im overweight. Should I accept it or go barf?
Its true, if we were perfect life would be boring
tostrong4you 2 years ago
You are awesome Steve.. I love all your videos. this one in particular is exactly where I am in my life at this point.. I really get a lot out of listening to you speak,. Thanks for putting yourself out there!
GCar35 2 years ago
Thanks a million for your encouragement.
vagabondsteve 2 years ago
I love your videos. They hit everything I think so dead on. And I wanna say thank you for doing these, they're amazing.
ladd428 2 years ago
Thank you for your support.
vagabondsteve 2 years ago
I'm portuguese ...so my english is not so good...
This is very good if you are alone and don´t have attachments, knots that you create in your life and that you can't forget or destroy...
ruialbertobasto 2 years ago
Even though I'm basically a should-for-brains, I love and accept myself just as I am.
Cashify 2 years ago
Thank you so much!!!
elphi76 2 years ago
Dude you and your vids are on my gratitude list today. Thank you.
matthewcutillo 2 years ago
You are so right in this too! I always felt that I had to change myself for others and that I had to please others so I could be loved. Now, I pay more attention to who I am and I am happier because I am accepting myself first and I don't spend as much time with the people that never accepted me for who I really am!
Thank you for the great lessons of life that you are sharing with all of us!
angelusa73 3 years ago
TY for commenting. Your welcome!
vagabondsteve 2 years ago
Great video, but are we really in control of any thing !!!
bedroomaction 3 years ago
Could you please elaborate.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
Beautifully put Steve! I have been watching your videos and feel so at peace...Thankyou for spreading your wisdom. xx
aberdesign 3 years ago
Thanks for the feedback. It means a lot to me that the videos are having an impact.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
Hi Steve,
This video could not have come at a better moment. Accepting myself as I am is not my strong point, but when I hear you talk about it it feels like the only way to have peace. Just go with the flow of life without trying to row upstream. :-)
Have a nice and peacefull day and thanks again for your words.
Ineke
barberaatje 3 years ago
Ineke thank you for your sharing.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
surrendering to my 'self-judgments' does not sound that appealing to me. the evaluation "i am flawed" is an axiom that organized religion and self help book authors need to proliferate sales and salvation. acceptance of where i am at might be of benefit if it's a 'reality check' to see where i am at in my life and looking at where this process will lead me next... to find what i am needing so i find ways to get those needs met...
bbbleaver 3 years ago
Good point. What we are talking about here is the neurotic destructive force which dwells on past and future. Obviously it is beneficial to learn from mistakes.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
"...the neurotic destructive force which dwells on past and future." what does this mean? acceptance of "flaws" ; flaw is a judgment ; judgments are concerned with who is what ; this is a type of blame ; instead of looking at how we are responsible for our thoughts, feelings, and actions and the choices derived from conclusions based on judgments, criticisms, and evaluations (which are largely assumptions and unfounded data) ; we remain unaware of the other 99% of what's influencing us (cont.)
bbbleaver 3 years ago
to make any lasting change we need to be aware of our values influencing our thoughts, feelings, and actions. accepting ourselves as fucked up is not enough or even a good place to begin! there is nothing wrong with me. though i see many things that i do that do not serve my life and relationships. i feel concerned about this and seek to understand the need to change certain habits. is the need to change coming from friends, family, society? or is it an intrinsic desire?
bbbleaver 3 years ago
self empathy is powerful and imparts a deeper sense of acceptance that can be shared. slowing down long enough to actually acknowledge an emotion and our reactions allows us to shine the light of consciousness on the roots of this emotion and the need being expressed and from there we can find ways of fulfilling that need while gaining a greater understanding of who we are. not as flawed or addicted or hateful but fulfilling needs in a unhealthy way that is alienating of others and even us...
bbbleaver 3 years ago
Agreed, I appreciate your exposition of the topic. Could you please give us a practical example of how someone might apply this awareness to something like alcoholism.
vagabondsteve 2 years ago
Our loving ourselves and allowing our own magnificence to radiate, not because of something we did to become that way, but just because we are simply because we ARE. Beings, not doings, is sweet. BECAUSE we realize who we ARE however, we DO naturally reach out to others, as you have here. The doing part to our fellow man, the giving of ourselves and our compassion and non-judgement of others is a natural extension of when we realize who we are. Then our light shines brightly with no effort.
BookofMormonReader 3 years ago
Part of what you say I agree with and part of it I couldn't disagree more. I love this: "We are spiritual beings having a human experience, not the other way around." As such, we really are divine deep within and the spirit, NOT the ego can't NOT strive for excellence and growth. Surrendering to the realization that we are divine changes our perspective totally. "Would a daughter of God behave this way?"
BookofMormonReader 3 years ago
Thank you for your comment. What part did you not agree with?
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
wow this inspired me so much, thanks :)
Ama12186 3 years ago
Thank you everyone for inspiring me through your comments.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
embracing instead of resisting.
GAH! LOVE LOVE LOVE THAT!
One of your BEST vlogs to date Steve, and that says a lot since I love every single vlog you have ever done. hehe FAV'D!
:) you are chicken soup for the soup, indeedie.
jakluk4 3 years ago
*soul
jakluk4 3 years ago
You are sweet. Thank you jak for commenting and your kind words.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
Our perfection is our imperfection. I am...what, who, and why are irrelevant. I simply am. Great video.
forgetfulgod 3 years ago
Yes! Thank you for taking the time to comment.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
A lack of Acceptance = Resistance
Flaws and imperfections are tricky words to dissect. I choose to align my thoughts with seeing the perfection in everything, and though I explain it differently methinks you are saying the same thing...
What this means to me is that I see any and all of our creations (in our lives) as perfect in process, and if we don't like what we're creating we can TAKE RESPONSIBILITY and change our thoughts and belief patterns to reflect the life we DO wish to live!
NemaselsNeo 3 years ago
SAo true! Reminds me of Byron Katie and how she talks about their being no new thoughts.
I want, I need, they should!... Blah blah blah..
and I guess we need to add shoulda coulda woulda. We all think the same thought. Useless!
Fieldofaware 3 years ago
Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda is the single most unsuccessful way to Also Trade (Stocks, options, Forex)........i guess i needed that previous xperience so i can grow!?!!?......how true Steve. Wishing u the best.
Mustafoinc 3 years ago
Thank you Steve. As I am reading Eckart Tolle: "The Power of Now" what you are saying make a lots of senses. It goes with what he is saying about being in the now and stop that "chit-chat" which always occupy our mind. I often have to become conscious during the day and become present and tell myself ot that other "self" inside of my mind who always says' " Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda". Shut the Fuck up..!!!! I keep telling myself. Excuse my French !
LeCanadienerrant 3 years ago
Instead of telling it to 'shut up' just peaceably observe it without resistance.
vagabondsteve 2 years ago
shoulda, coulda, woulda, gotta! hee, hee.
gretchen4321 3 years ago
Right-on! The state of non-acceptance of anything creates suffering. Some things may be our choice to be worth the pain (e.g. I want a degree, I don't accept missing it, therefore I'll suffer for it) vs. unnecessary pain (I don't accept that I'm overweight therefore I cannot be happy, etc).
Your v-blog posts are linked on my own blog now, I want to spread this content. Keep it up man, you're nourishing a way to explain how people can just BE in daily life, NOW, to suffer less and be happier
kaiserpathos 3 years ago
Thanks for spreading the word.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
Wow This one was just what I needed to hear, like it was created for me. haha
Thanks Steve!!
SodiumFreeVideos 3 years ago
It's a pleasure.
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
struggles build walls and create pain. This kind of talk opens pathways. I'l add that this kind encouragement has a place in the raising of healthy children.
wolffenhaus 3 years ago
Great point!
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
whered you get your hat i want one lol
misseptember 3 years ago
REI
vagabondsteve 3 years ago
shoulda coulda wouda lolll
misseptember 3 years ago
hi Steve, your message of self-acceptance is wonderful because once we can accept everything of ourselves, we can start accepting others' flaws & all.....also when we can pair that with self-awareness and compassion, that will help us evolve without feeling critical of ourselves. You make a good example...I used to be hard on myself for gaining wt. but then when I stopped beating myself for not exerc/dieting, I naturally led a healthier lifesty. & did exerc I enjoyed--my body changed.
venuscoffee 3 years ago
this fuckinbg youtube doesnt load, i cant stand, i dont know what to do. My LIFE IS OVER, youtube doesnt load anymore
Mongodelight 3 years ago
spot on steve.... this hits the nail on the head for me...
thanks buddy...... keep it up.. Peace
kapaka12 3 years ago
Life is in the Doing. Should could and would never did anything. Exceptance is the key to my happyness today. Knowing what to change is important. The only thing I can change about someone else is my attitude towards them. Pease. Good mind you have there.
hellavadeal 3 years ago 2