This vid. was heartbreaking to watch. I just wanted to give you a big hug! The way you are/were feeling is NORMAL! My son was exactly like what you were describing, and it felt like some sort of sick torture! I promise you, it will get better!! XOXO
Hey sarah! I am expecting twins in may- I was wondering if u read any books in preparation of twins or just any baby books? If so, which ones do u think helped u the most? I just don't want I waste time reading just any book. If u see this and get a chance to answer me that would be awesome!!!
Hey Sarah. I don't know if my suggestion is going to be good or not but maybe if your mom sees how you are feeling she will be willing to help you a little more. You know one day every other week maybe you can go get a mani/pedi and go to the park read or listen to music. Just try & have a relaxing day. You seem tired! & that wont cost to much $. Have a little alone time to recharge & you will be as good as new.
Hay! just something eles you can do with a nice wine etc PAINT!!! play your favorite tunes and Paint or draw how your feeling as a mommy at this time and other times when you feel in a good mood. Make a collection of your paintings as a mom, then you will look back at them and cry and laugh at this wild journey. xx
Hi Sarah, I love you, I think your the most down to earth honest person that speaks her truth through every step on your path of mother hood, you have great integrity and are such a inspiration for us who are a little timid, you cant go wrong, keep being your beautiful self, please continue to lets us know, because in a few years time if this doesn’t break you, you will be a amazing light for us all. THANKYOU!!
Hay! jsut letting you know when I am despretly and that razers edge with my twins, have a stiff drink and sing a grovey song in the shower, then chuck some headphones on and some cool tune bob marely etc something fun and go outside breath the air, sing and dont care what people think, your a mother, a goddess! giver of life sing it like you mean it damn it!
Keep your chin up girly, things will get better and Logan will calm down some more. You're a mommy, one of the best gifts in the world and I hope things get a little better for you! Thank you for sharing your feelings, and I know form some close friends with just ONE child that have been where you are. As a side note: Could you join the YMCA for a small fee and do something there to get you energized and ready to tackle the day? Or a group of mom's who need to get out?
No one understands what it is like to be a mother unless they have babies themselves. I am going to be a first time mommy in July :) and I am probably going to be like you. One baby is enough for me... but TWO?!?! That makes you a super stong mama! You are awesome and an inspiration!! :)
Stay strong Sarah....you are a GREAT MOM! I have been following your journey since your first video.....I know that you are a Great Mom! Stay strong. You can do this! Logan and Quinn are beautiful!
Ur words are real life mom. People may say u are complaining but the fact is that u are being sincere. I understand u I had my times with my teenager since a very earky age and that doesnt mean I dont love him cause I crazy love him. You need to the time for yourself, pamper you there has to be away to relax, maybe a little free time to have a girl time.
I love the fact you are real about this stuff. It happens & it happens alot more than people are willing to talk about. I hope you are finding ways to cope with it. I found just going for a walk or going to the backyard to be in the fresh air and not closed up helped also having something to look forward to everything seemed easier and to go smoother. Maybe there's a mothers group you could join to have adult interaction.
Sarah I completely understand where you're coming from. I get overwhelmed as well and I couldn't imagine twins. Thanks for being so honest it makes me feel all of us mommies are in it together.
(To that asshole that wrote that post FUCK OFF and get a life.)
u will make it. you seemed so strong in your infertility journey so i know u got this. don't stress so much. remember u could still be ttcing. be thankful and pray about it. :-) i wish u all the best
dont worry about any bad things ppl say. these feelings are normal. i got one daughter and she had colic and i felt this way too. and i had the heart things too and the weight problem i lost a lot of weight after i had my daughter but then i gained it all back, so im in this with ya, im trying to loss weight to. 2 weeks after my daughter was born i was 170lbs, i want that back. :) good luck keep your head up.
@SARAH25PCOS you're just mad because i hit a nerve and you know I'm right...you don't need to make dramatic videos about fussy babies you just need to take care of them...
@ukejuke100 the point of this vlog is to tell honest frustrations, happiness, joy, sorrow, and have SUPPORT, not self righteous assholes leaving comments on an ALREADY frustrated and exhausted mother who is having troubles. The worst part is, if a mother who did NOT have IVF said this, youd be fine, but because she wanted her kids, she is now unjust in her frustrations? Get off your highhorse and realize that there are times to speak and times to shut up, and this is the time to shut the fuck up
@ukejuke100 Buddy. Seriously. If you haven't been in my shoes. If you haven't cared for twins. There's no need to be watching or commenting on these videos. Again...I mean this is the most sincere way possible.............please, fuck off.
I'm so sorry you are feeling so crappy. Do try to get outside more. Sunlight is good for the blahs. Big hug!! Wish I was a neighbor so I could hang out :)
YEp I feel ya boo! I have two month old twins. A boy and a girl too. And already I am going a bit wonky. You are so normal and you just need to start finding yourself again. I am trying so hard to still do what I like. Reading lol when I can, watching youtube when the babies sleep, and I should be too lol. I rearrange my house a lot, just do things you like at home. We are broke too and I stay home with the babies. Hang in there.
Being a Mommy is hard, and going from working to not working is hard, and lastly, being broke is hard. Just know it's not going to last forever. Remember how hard you tried for those babies and all the time, effort and money put in to giving them life.
i know the feeling, on feb8 my youngest would be 1 year old n from the time i had him all he does it cry n now even more since his teeth are starting to grown. Just hand in there i love to see your up date of you n your family. i also know today logan n quinn turn 1 year old. look at how much they have grown. much love to you n your family.
Big hugs! I know how you feel in a way. I too am a little on the poor side as of now so I just go window shopping but hey its something. Anything to get out. I have no friends near me that could understand me. If you need to chat hit me up!
I'm so thankful that you make videos like this that are so honest and in the moment and real. I'm 18 weeks pregnant with twin girls and I plan on going back to work after I have them bc I think I would go stir crazy all day in the house with them. It sounds like you've lost yourself as a person and gotten so wrapped up in the mommy role that you've lost Sarah. My heart goes out to you and I wish I had a something to say to make it better. You are a strong woman, and this too shall pass.
Sarah! I totally understand how you're feeling! I have 7.5 month old boy/girl twins and a 3 year old. And Life is CRAZY! Its SO easy to lose yourself in all the chaos..Im a SAHM and my husband works long hours and most days mesh together, I like to have a few drinks after the kids are in bed to wind down. Just as you my passion is makeup, I think you and I have alot in common. If you ever want to talk Im here!
continued... reach out to your other mum friends i know they may be busy but surely none of them would turn you away if you show them how down and lost you feel.
i love your videos and think you an inspiration for being sooo open and honest on here xx chin up huni xx it really does get better x
sounds like anixeity hun xx or panic attacks i get them sometimes xx my oldest is 4yrs the 17mnt and im 24 weeks pregnant wit my 3rd so ive been home for 4 yrs with my kids before this had a successful career and i find that you have to have structure plan your days and weeks fill them up with trips to the park and even wander round the mall. go to baby/toddler groups (which i hate btw )but its for my sanity....
Sarah, you are an incredible make-up artist!! Can you offer your services to make some extra cash and then save up for a little getaway. I think a spa retreat will be just what the doctor ordered. Can you connect with other moms of twins? It will be so therapeutic for you to connect with others in your shoes. Take care of yourself xoxo
STRESS!!!!! YOU NEED A BREAK TO breath and yes find yourself get yourself back....... Especially if your a work driven woman.. staying home can be the most wonderful, stressful thing a woman has to go through. You can easily loose yourself. This is why I joined a few social groups in the area!
I cant relate with babies but I can relate to your lost feelings due to divorce. I know it seems like "who would I hang out with, where would I go, im broke" seems valid reasons. BUT im here to bluntly tell you its NOT. I started reading Eat Pray Love.. and its inspirational. do it on a low level! Go to parks and take a book and read, go to the mall and walk, go to a beach and cry/think/write. Join gym classes, make friends. Find things YOU like again :) it can happen!! it just seems impossible
also ring those friends with kids, funnily enough you might not get your rant in over theirs :) Chin up it does get better and seriously if you still feel like this in about 3 or 4 days get to a doctor, your demeanor is not totally flat but a few more days feeling like this and it will be and then it's definatly time to see a DR. You are amazing, this vlog is such a help to others with your honesty and humour .Hang in there (HUG).
oh sarah,so many memories.I had 3 under 4 at one point,with 2 in nappies not twins though so not quite the same.I have watched all your vlogs(my daughter is having twins) .When i felt like this I packed mine all in the car and took them to the park or the beach, or to the library(we had a storyteller ) Playgroup was my sanity.I'm not sure if it is in the US but ever town and village in oz has one. I knew that once a week i could chat to other mums while the kids play.
All the comment before mine say it all. Hang in there hun!!!! Its hard but being a mom is one of the hardest jobs a woman could possibly have. Feeling the way you do is normal as im sure you have already been told. And sometimes tagging out is a good thing. Good Luck!!! Hope you are able to find something you wanna do. Not everything takes money. Sometimes ya just gotta be creative. =)
Worst case scenario. Sit in your car with a laptop & watch a show or something & call it the drive in. Haha Nerdy I know, but it doesn't cost a thing. ;-P
I'm so happy that you're so honest in your videos. I feel the same way as you do right now & my twins are only 7 mths old. My daughter is always crying about something & most times its really nothing. I'm with them all the time. If ever I have free time I do more laundry & fix a small pot of coffee to sip on the couch in silence after they've fallen asleep in their swings. Oh thank God for swings! I hope you get to feeling better soon & find a way to get some time to yourself. Worst ca
I'm glad you shared, this is a part of being a stay at home mom that I'm sure everyone has been through and just don't want to admit it. I know you aren't asking for advise, but one thing that I would do is have your doc run your bloodwork, your hormones or vitamin levels could be out of wack. One thing that helped me, was the dreaded "G" word, as in gym. We had a gym open near us that was like $35 a month childcare included. I got to work on my fitness and have convos with adults, it's win win.
that's my life (minus the good little girl)... my son is making loud noises constantly! Losing my MIND!!!!.. Also, lost all my friends when I had a baby at 39!! and I quit my six figure job!! Yikes! This situation has made me real spiritual! and I've had to try to find little things to do for myself! taking a shower is great! go outside! take a walk..do some xrsz, eat some good food... do your makeup just for fun... those are some of the things I've done.... it'll get better..hang in there
Iv'e been a stay at home momma for 5 years with my son. When you have no money to do anything or buy anything you do lose who you are. You don't know what you like anymore. Pretty much you don't know what to do with yourself. But trust me it will get better. Being a mommy is hard. You put everything you've got into your babies. That just means you are a great mommy. My heart does the same thing. Mostly if I'm over tired or not eating good. I can't afford to go to a specialist right now.
I feel and felt like that a lot. Hang in there it gets better. I have a 2 year old and a 3 month old and I end up crying at least once a week. It is hard staying at home. I have been going to the gym 6 days a week and letting My Husband watch the kids for an hour or two. So I kill two birds with one stone. I get to work out and Mommy time. At some point you just have to walk out the door and start walking in any direction. Bring a book and sit somewhere with lots of people around have a coffee.
:( Im so sorry your feeling like this... I cant imagine what 2 babies is like but i do have 2 young children- a 4yr old boy and a 6mth old girl and im single. Day-to-day its me with them and lately my daughter is going through seperation anxiety i think because she hates me leaving her (like to cook tea, have a shower, do something for my son) so its hard to always get things done but theres no one else here to help... I moved to my current area to be near my daughters father and now that it
@AussieMummySince07 didnt work out with him, im in this area i dont know, my close firends are all over an hour away and i feel like ive completely alienated myself all for nothing now... So i get upset about that... And im also stressed about money, i need a new car and i just dont have the money to buy another after i spent every cent i had on a new car last year and it fucked up on me so i lost all that money (private sale)... :'(
I hope you can get out once in a while, go for a walk,
@AussieMummySince07 do you have a beach near you? Ive always found the beach to be so calming and relaxing when im stressed or upset... At least you have your husband there to help out and take over when you have reached your limit- a luxury i dont have unfortunately...
I know its hard now, but try to keep reminding yourself that it wont last- things WILL get better and you will be ok and get through it :) xxx
I'm typing 1 handed, but I so wanted to write you. My middle child, Peyton was extremely high needs. She ran on a very high volt even as a baby. There were somedays where I had to say, "to hell w/ dishes, laundry" and I would load up a stroller & hit a park. Just breathing fresh air & out of our confining 4 walls was healing, But also if bedtime is your only break...fill up a tub & start a book you've wanted to read.
I hear U! I'm a stay at home mommy now too after working for 15 years...with a degree & it's been quite the ridE!! Most of my friends have kids so every1 is busy...Just being home all the time gets u kinda' down...& when I'm home I'm constantly doing something...Laundry, cleaning, paying bills, organizing...etc. it's a challenge but let's hang in there for our lil' ones! I have a lil' boy & he is a hand FuLL, he's so strong & wants his way all the time...physically draining but aLL worth it! =)
Hope you're able to get some "me" time. Not a mom (yet) but getting ready to do IVF. Husband isn't scared of twins but I've always been a bit more hesitant at the thought... Putting it in God's hands. Rumor has it He doesn't give us more than we can handle. You're videos are great (and HONEST) . Maybe you could get a part-time job for just a few hours on the weekend or evenings?... You do hair right- Maybe a traveling hairstylist? You're probably rolling your eyes at these ideas, but though
Hey Sarah, I have such a deep appreciation for your sincere honesty. I could literally feel your energy. Just so you know babe: Always remember to take care of you emotionally, spiritually, physically, etc so you can be the best mom that you can be to those beautiful babies. They need you, however, you need you also. Sometimes, I find that complete silence helps me to clear my head and just allow my thoughts to run free! Men will never totally get it. I wish you mental peace & strength.
When he throws fits, would it be feasible to remove yourself from him (leave the room, turn away, remove him from the room)...deprive him of any attention (assuming, of course, that you know he's perfectly fine) so he starts to associate a negative reaction to his fits? I wish you the best. I appreciate your honesty.
I can relate to this feeling. I usually feel like this at least twice a week. I'm an airforce wife and 30+ hours from all my family and friends. The "Me" i used to be is gone. I no longer get to be me, I'm mommy now. My husband doesn't understand at all when I try to discribe this feeling to him but I'd say it's as close to physical pain as you can get emotionally. I had my son young so my friends aren't parents and have stopped answering my calls... Parenting isn't all sunshine :/
awwww sweetie, keep your head held up high. I am not a sahm but I am a single mother of 3 miracles. I too know how you feel. I know its hard but this will pass. Life may be hard but it will in due time get better. Always keep your head up and know that you were put here to be their mother, you were chosen out of everyone to parent those two precious miracles. No one said it would be easy, but it sure is worth it!! Smile!!
Do you think your friends would be interested in mommy/child play dates? Try aiming for once a month and see how it goes. It doesn't have to be a big production. Don't attempt a Martha Stewart event. Most mommies are used to eating their kid's leftovers anyways. Also, if you can get away try a random class- yoga, jazzercise, hip hop, whatever. Most places offer first class free and you can buy 10 classes for x amount of money with no expiration date. Try bouncing from free class to free class
Oh and did I mention my kid never likes anything I cook for him..its a challenge to find something he'll eat. Somedays I'm like here eat a cookie..just so he doesn't go hungry then I feel like a bad mom.. hubs doesn't get that I need time to myself but then he's not with him 24/7 either..men r so stupid
Oh sweet Sarah, my heart is expanding to hold your heart in peace and love. This too shall pass. Have you told any of your friends with kids how you feel, I bet they would totally relate and MAKE time for you. What about a babysitter share or swap? I also urge you to try meditation or self-hypnosis, you can find lots of guided ones on youtube....soooo totally free!!! Sending you so much love, peace and hope. xo
Omg.. sarah I was having the same kind of day as u today.. i m a sahm to a 17mo old and I don't even know who the hell I am..what do I like anymore.brayden does this Nellie Olsen cry and omg.. i d rather pour hot wax in my ears. I wish we lived close..maybe we cld skype sometime or chit chat on the phone.. we are literally in the exact situation
I know how you feel. I don't have twins, but I have a 3 year old and a 3 mth old (and nursing) and sometimes it just feels like the walls are going to cave in. But as everyone here says, it DOES get better. Even if your husband can take the kids out for a couple hours so you can have a nice bath with a glass of wine and a book (or whatever YOU), it can really recharge your batteries.
Take care, keep on truckin'. (?! Whatever that means) :)
Things do get better just keep remembering that! Soon your babies will be your best friends to call. My daughter had colic for a year and I cried that whole year and now shes 4 and i just had my son hes 10 months and he doesnt have colic but hes always fussing all day everyday but i know now it does get better and the lonleyness and wanting to go out and be you agian will come, just be strong you will get yourself back I promise!!!!!
Oh hun what you are going through is part of Post postpartum depression. It also sounds like anxiety as well. Please Talk to your doctor about this, before it gets worse. I went through PPD as did my midwife, she ended up in the hospital for 10 days. I see it on your face , the way your body language is. I am not a Doctor, but I have experience with this, not only first hand but I have a masters degree in Psych and I have done studies and papers on this.
@hartrose33 Could it be postpartum a year after they were born? I could be wrong but I thought that happened like in the few months after you gave birth.
So sorry you're feeling like this. I appreciate your honesty b/c I agree that being a mom somedays is really tough and lonely & it's probably doubly so for you. What made you most happy before the babies? Could you get a night off where you get to take a long bath, listen to favorite music, call a friend, paint your toenails, etc? Maybe you can plan ahead to hang with a mom friend who probably needs a break too. Schedule it for a week or 2 from now. Hang in there, it will get better!
Oh, and I should probably mention that I ran away to my bedroom after my hubs came home and I'm sitting here watching YouTube on my phone with my headphones in. Mommy's in a time out.
I also had the heart issue, mine skipped every fourth beat..., it was benign and stress related. This too will get better once your little devil calms down. You're an amazing mother, taking care of two kids, you might not feel like it right now but you are! I wish I could just pick up the phone and talk to you in person. Again, hang in there, this will pass! So sorry!
im a new mom of twin girls mines r 6months it gets veryyyyyyyy over welmin i kno ur pain! seriousli we sometimes gotaaaa take a breather butt i feel noone understands us as mom of twins one of twins yellll n has tantrums n she doesnt stop n den 2nd min shes laughin den bak to crying wen everything is well wit her
I was just saying this to my husband. a whole year at home. Who the hell am I. I went for a walk today and spent 30 minutes talking to a mormon who gave me a flyer. Normally I would not talk to them but I was so desperate to talk to someone. How pathetic huh. I went to the emergency room because I had a heart palpitations and they prescribed me larazapam. only take it when I need it but damn it works! I am thinking about you hun. I hope things get better. I wish I could visit you.
Oh Sarah, i'm so sorry you're going through this, I've been there, I have a 15 month old, and shortly before he turned one, he was a mess for about two months... I mean I hate to say it but I felt like giving him away. I could not take it any more!!! The only thing that saved my sanity was to carry him on my back in a baby backpack. Try to meet with your friends who are moms too and go for a walk, with the kids in a stroller and VENT!!!!!!! This WILL pass, I promise!!
I feel ya! Im a mom of 5 and ya every thing you said is part of being a mommy . Its not always pretty! Im glad you did this video because this is REALY life ! Its not always unicorns and rainbows! Lots of people just arnt as honest as you!
Ah honey you sound so stressed. My sister went through something similar and finally she just went to a counsellor so that she could bounce ideas off of in order to figure out who she was outside of just being a mother to a toddler. She wasn't depressed, just frustrated as hell and didn't know what to do next outside of chasing after her son. Sometimes the local public library has events that go on or visiting a local gallery is free. Even local community centers my have free events.
So sorry to hear about your situation. I'm sure it happens to most moms of multiples. The feeling you have of the palpitations and that feeling of like a burp stuck between your heart and throat happens to me usually before I get an anxiety attack. I've learned to control it with meditation. I understand that financially it is hard perhaps have play dates with friends where the kids get to play while you connect with your girls or maybe try doing some makeup work from your house part time.
The joys of mother hood is not always a joy. I feel your pain. I don't have twins, but I have a daughter. She's 7 now, but I remember all those days when life was just blah and all I heard was crying.. I hope you feel better soon. You just need to get out of the house for a night or two. Don't feel guilty about it. Mommy's need time to themselves too. I know it sounds lame, but when I wanted to get away sometimes, I'd wander around the dollar store and walk down every isle. Anything helps.
And the other suggestion-try to find some time-even if you are holding him to dive into a book. This often time would help me to keep my mind sharp. Even escaping for a few minutes can take away some of those mommy blues! Hope this helped!
As a mommy of twins, I can understand where you are coming from! This happened to me too. I had one that was usually fine, and then one that was always fussing about something. And I was a stay at home mommy as well. You give so much of yourself that you feel empty at the end of the day,...and it can feel quite depressing. I have two suggestions for you. 1-check his diet and make sure that he hasn't developed any food intolerances and doesnt have a tummy ache-
Hello Sarah ! i would like to send you something if can give me a private msg here with a postal address so i can send it when i get a chance, if your not cool with that its ok no probs, Take care hun. peace n love.
Hi, Sarah!
This vid. was heartbreaking to watch. I just wanted to give you a big hug! The way you are/were feeling is NORMAL! My son was exactly like what you were describing, and it felt like some sort of sick torture! I promise you, it will get better!! XOXO
mfdcreates 3 days ago
Hey sarah! I am expecting twins in may- I was wondering if u read any books in preparation of twins or just any baby books? If so, which ones do u think helped u the most? I just don't want I waste time reading just any book. If u see this and get a chance to answer me that would be awesome!!!
mleclerc27 1 week ago
Hey Sarah. I don't know if my suggestion is going to be good or not but maybe if your mom sees how you are feeling she will be willing to help you a little more. You know one day every other week maybe you can go get a mani/pedi and go to the park read or listen to music. Just try & have a relaxing day. You seem tired! & that wont cost to much $. Have a little alone time to recharge & you will be as good as new.
mandy123186 3 weeks ago
wow this is a very honest video. your brave for putting yourself out there like this.
collaredslaveja 4 weeks ago
Hay! just something eles you can do with a nice wine etc PAINT!!! play your favorite tunes and Paint or draw how your feeling as a mommy at this time and other times when you feel in a good mood. Make a collection of your paintings as a mom, then you will look back at them and cry and laugh at this wild journey. xx
alchemi3663 1 month ago
Hi Sarah, I love you, I think your the most down to earth honest person that speaks her truth through every step on your path of mother hood, you have great integrity and are such a inspiration for us who are a little timid, you cant go wrong, keep being your beautiful self, please continue to lets us know, because in a few years time if this doesn’t break you, you will be a amazing light for us all. THANKYOU!!
alchemi3663 1 month ago
Hay! jsut letting you know when I am despretly and that razers edge with my twins, have a stiff drink and sing a grovey song in the shower, then chuck some headphones on and some cool tune bob marely etc something fun and go outside breath the air, sing and dont care what people think, your a mother, a goddess! giver of life sing it like you mean it damn it!
alchemi3663 1 month ago
Keep your chin up girly, things will get better and Logan will calm down some more. You're a mommy, one of the best gifts in the world and I hope things get a little better for you! Thank you for sharing your feelings, and I know form some close friends with just ONE child that have been where you are. As a side note: Could you join the YMCA for a small fee and do something there to get you energized and ready to tackle the day? Or a group of mom's who need to get out?
kkiser03 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos
No one understands what it is like to be a mother unless they have babies themselves. I am going to be a first time mommy in July :) and I am probably going to be like you. One baby is enough for me... but TWO?!?! That makes you a super stong mama! You are awesome and an inspiration!! :)
JLynnAE46 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos
Stay strong Sarah....you are a GREAT MOM! I have been following your journey since your first video.....I know that you are a Great Mom! Stay strong. You can do this! Logan and Quinn are beautiful!
awaitingmyangel 1 month ago
Ur words are real life mom. People may say u are complaining but the fact is that u are being sincere. I understand u I had my times with my teenager since a very earky age and that doesnt mean I dont love him cause I crazy love him. You need to the time for yourself, pamper you there has to be away to relax, maybe a little free time to have a girl time.
IVFnewdreams 1 month ago
I love the fact you are real about this stuff. It happens & it happens alot more than people are willing to talk about. I hope you are finding ways to cope with it. I found just going for a walk or going to the backyard to be in the fresh air and not closed up helped also having something to look forward to everything seemed easier and to go smoother. Maybe there's a mothers group you could join to have adult interaction.
tezmae 1 month ago
Sarah I completely understand where you're coming from. I get overwhelmed as well and I couldn't imagine twins. Thanks for being so honest it makes me feel all of us mommies are in it together.
(To that asshole that wrote that post FUCK OFF and get a life.)
perfectnpink100 1 month ago
u will make it. you seemed so strong in your infertility journey so i know u got this. don't stress so much. remember u could still be ttcing. be thankful and pray about it. :-) i wish u all the best
carrieida22 1 month ago
dont worry about any bad things ppl say. these feelings are normal. i got one daughter and she had colic and i felt this way too. and i had the heart things too and the weight problem i lost a lot of weight after i had my daughter but then i gained it all back, so im in this with ya, im trying to loss weight to. 2 weeks after my daughter was born i was 170lbs, i want that back. :) good luck keep your head up.
mandazowie 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos
Hi sarah be strong and stay positive.:-) you can do it..by
The way where can i see your ivf cycle videos from the start.im about to undergo ivf as well.thank you and God BLess.:-)
balut4all 1 month ago
you wanted kids...now you need to love them and don't complain about them...imagine if your kids saw this video....
ukejuke100 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos
@ukejuke100 If it was possible to smack you I would. I mean this is the most sincere way possible..............please, fuck off.
SARAH25PCOS 1 month ago 11
@SARAH25PCOS you're just mad because i hit a nerve and you know I'm right...you don't need to make dramatic videos about fussy babies you just need to take care of them...
ukejuke100 1 month ago
@ukejuke100 the point of this vlog is to tell honest frustrations, happiness, joy, sorrow, and have SUPPORT, not self righteous assholes leaving comments on an ALREADY frustrated and exhausted mother who is having troubles. The worst part is, if a mother who did NOT have IVF said this, youd be fine, but because she wanted her kids, she is now unjust in her frustrations? Get off your highhorse and realize that there are times to speak and times to shut up, and this is the time to shut the fuck up
kmaven04 1 month ago 10
@kmaven04 A-friggin'-men.
SARAH25PCOS 1 month ago 3
@ukejuke100 Buddy. Seriously. If you haven't been in my shoes. If you haven't cared for twins. There's no need to be watching or commenting on these videos. Again...I mean this is the most sincere way possible.............please, fuck off.
SARAH25PCOS 1 month ago 4
@ukejuke100 I'm gonna guess and say you don't have kids of your own cause if you did you would know just how stupid you sound right now!
taraalone 3 weeks ago
@ukejuke100 You obviously do not have children. You should really fuck off.
ambereleana1 2 weeks ago
I'm so sorry you are feeling so crappy. Do try to get outside more. Sunlight is good for the blahs. Big hug!! Wish I was a neighbor so I could hang out :)
GingerElle77 1 month ago
YEp I feel ya boo! I have two month old twins. A boy and a girl too. And already I am going a bit wonky. You are so normal and you just need to start finding yourself again. I am trying so hard to still do what I like. Reading lol when I can, watching youtube when the babies sleep, and I should be too lol. I rearrange my house a lot, just do things you like at home. We are broke too and I stay home with the babies. Hang in there.
Fairelady5 1 month ago
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chainy77 1 month ago
Being a Mommy is hard, and going from working to not working is hard, and lastly, being broke is hard. Just know it's not going to last forever. Remember how hard you tried for those babies and all the time, effort and money put in to giving them life.
flsurromom4 1 month ago
I understand your frustration!!!
haileyann33 1 month ago
i know the feeling, on feb8 my youngest would be 1 year old n from the time i had him all he does it cry n now even more since his teeth are starting to grown. Just hand in there i love to see your up date of you n your family. i also know today logan n quinn turn 1 year old. look at how much they have grown. much love to you n your family.
fabulosa360 2 months ago in playlist More videos from SARAH25PCOS
Big hugs! I know how you feel in a way. I too am a little on the poor side as of now so I just go window shopping but hey its something. Anything to get out. I have no friends near me that could understand me. If you need to chat hit me up!
laguayaca 2 months ago
I admire your honesty and I wish I could give you a big hug.
julieg713 2 months ago
its heart palputations, and its stress. you need to go for walks.
JenChristiansmommy 2 months ago
try and stay positive!!!!!!!I know its hard but look at the blessings you have.
JenChristiansmommy 2 months ago
I'm so thankful that you make videos like this that are so honest and in the moment and real. I'm 18 weeks pregnant with twin girls and I plan on going back to work after I have them bc I think I would go stir crazy all day in the house with them. It sounds like you've lost yourself as a person and gotten so wrapped up in the mommy role that you've lost Sarah. My heart goes out to you and I wish I had a something to say to make it better. You are a strong woman, and this too shall pass.
LeavingForVenus 2 months ago in playlist Raising Our Twins: Logan & Quinn
Sarah! I totally understand how you're feeling! I have 7.5 month old boy/girl twins and a 3 year old. And Life is CRAZY! Its SO easy to lose yourself in all the chaos..Im a SAHM and my husband works long hours and most days mesh together, I like to have a few drinks after the kids are in bed to wind down. Just as you my passion is makeup, I think you and I have alot in common. If you ever want to talk Im here!
stephbolton1986 2 months ago
I can totally relate with this feeling sometimes.
DeeandArt1 2 months ago
*hugs* I wish I was closer to you
HopefulLadie 2 months ago
continued... reach out to your other mum friends i know they may be busy but surely none of them would turn you away if you show them how down and lost you feel.
i love your videos and think you an inspiration for being sooo open and honest on here xx chin up huni xx it really does get better x
alexbates01 2 months ago
sounds like anixeity hun xx or panic attacks i get them sometimes xx my oldest is 4yrs the 17mnt and im 24 weeks pregnant wit my 3rd so ive been home for 4 yrs with my kids before this had a successful career and i find that you have to have structure plan your days and weeks fill them up with trips to the park and even wander round the mall. go to baby/toddler groups (which i hate btw )but its for my sanity....
alexbates01 2 months ago
Sarah, you are an incredible make-up artist!! Can you offer your services to make some extra cash and then save up for a little getaway. I think a spa retreat will be just what the doctor ordered. Can you connect with other moms of twins? It will be so therapeutic for you to connect with others in your shoes. Take care of yourself xoxo
TheLifeInTheNorth 2 months ago
STRESS!!!!! YOU NEED A BREAK TO breath and yes find yourself get yourself back....... Especially if your a work driven woman.. staying home can be the most wonderful, stressful thing a woman has to go through. You can easily loose yourself. This is why I joined a few social groups in the area!
missmo1984 2 months ago
Just go for a walk or a car ride by yourself. Read or even go to starbucks and bring the laptop and just spend an hour relaxin. I wish u luck
britndorian 2 months ago
I cant relate with babies but I can relate to your lost feelings due to divorce. I know it seems like "who would I hang out with, where would I go, im broke" seems valid reasons. BUT im here to bluntly tell you its NOT. I started reading Eat Pray Love.. and its inspirational. do it on a low level! Go to parks and take a book and read, go to the mall and walk, go to a beach and cry/think/write. Join gym classes, make friends. Find things YOU like again :) it can happen!! it just seems impossible
TheTurnersJourney 2 months ago
also ring those friends with kids, funnily enough you might not get your rant in over theirs :) Chin up it does get better and seriously if you still feel like this in about 3 or 4 days get to a doctor, your demeanor is not totally flat but a few more days feeling like this and it will be and then it's definatly time to see a DR. You are amazing, this vlog is such a help to others with your honesty and humour .Hang in there (HUG).
beemay111 2 months ago
oh sarah,so many memories.I had 3 under 4 at one point,with 2 in nappies not twins though so not quite the same.I have watched all your vlogs(my daughter is having twins) .When i felt like this I packed mine all in the car and took them to the park or the beach, or to the library(we had a storyteller ) Playgroup was my sanity.I'm not sure if it is in the US but ever town and village in oz has one. I knew that once a week i could chat to other mums while the kids play.
beemay111 2 months ago
All the comment before mine say it all. Hang in there hun!!!! Its hard but being a mom is one of the hardest jobs a woman could possibly have. Feeling the way you do is normal as im sure you have already been told. And sometimes tagging out is a good thing. Good Luck!!! Hope you are able to find something you wanna do. Not everything takes money. Sometimes ya just gotta be creative. =)
sebastiansmommy8309 2 months ago
Continued.......
Worst case scenario. Sit in your car with a laptop & watch a show or something & call it the drive in. Haha Nerdy I know, but it doesn't cost a thing. ;-P
Ready4Miracles 2 months ago
Sarah,
I'm so happy that you're so honest in your videos. I feel the same way as you do right now & my twins are only 7 mths old. My daughter is always crying about something & most times its really nothing. I'm with them all the time. If ever I have free time I do more laundry & fix a small pot of coffee to sip on the couch in silence after they've fallen asleep in their swings. Oh thank God for swings! I hope you get to feeling better soon & find a way to get some time to yourself. Worst ca
Ready4Miracles 2 months ago
I'm glad you shared, this is a part of being a stay at home mom that I'm sure everyone has been through and just don't want to admit it. I know you aren't asking for advise, but one thing that I would do is have your doc run your bloodwork, your hormones or vitamin levels could be out of wack. One thing that helped me, was the dreaded "G" word, as in gym. We had a gym open near us that was like $35 a month childcare included. I got to work on my fitness and have convos with adults, it's win win.
HoorayForHairbows 2 months ago
@HoorayForHairbows I can see why the gym helped. Working out is an excellent way to relieve stress!
LeavingForVenus 2 months ago
that's my life (minus the good little girl)... my son is making loud noises constantly! Losing my MIND!!!!.. Also, lost all my friends when I had a baby at 39!! and I quit my six figure job!! Yikes! This situation has made me real spiritual! and I've had to try to find little things to do for myself! taking a shower is great! go outside! take a walk..do some xrsz, eat some good food... do your makeup just for fun... those are some of the things I've done.... it'll get better..hang in there
magildeny 2 months ago
continued------------- I'm expecting twin boys in 6 weeks.
angelfacemoma 2 months ago
@angelfacemoma Aw congrats! I'm 18 weeks with twin girls! lol
LeavingForVenus 2 months ago
@LeavingForVenus Thanks :) and congrats to you too.
angelfacemoma 2 months ago
Iv'e been a stay at home momma for 5 years with my son. When you have no money to do anything or buy anything you do lose who you are. You don't know what you like anymore. Pretty much you don't know what to do with yourself. But trust me it will get better. Being a mommy is hard. You put everything you've got into your babies. That just means you are a great mommy. My heart does the same thing. Mostly if I'm over tired or not eating good. I can't afford to go to a specialist right now.
angelfacemoma 2 months ago
I feel and felt like that a lot. Hang in there it gets better. I have a 2 year old and a 3 month old and I end up crying at least once a week. It is hard staying at home. I have been going to the gym 6 days a week and letting My Husband watch the kids for an hour or two. So I kill two birds with one stone. I get to work out and Mommy time. At some point you just have to walk out the door and start walking in any direction. Bring a book and sit somewhere with lots of people around have a coffee.
heatherlycke 2 months ago
:( Im so sorry your feeling like this... I cant imagine what 2 babies is like but i do have 2 young children- a 4yr old boy and a 6mth old girl and im single. Day-to-day its me with them and lately my daughter is going through seperation anxiety i think because she hates me leaving her (like to cook tea, have a shower, do something for my son) so its hard to always get things done but theres no one else here to help... I moved to my current area to be near my daughters father and now that it
AussieMummySince07 2 months ago
@AussieMummySince07 didnt work out with him, im in this area i dont know, my close firends are all over an hour away and i feel like ive completely alienated myself all for nothing now... So i get upset about that... And im also stressed about money, i need a new car and i just dont have the money to buy another after i spent every cent i had on a new car last year and it fucked up on me so i lost all that money (private sale)... :'(
I hope you can get out once in a while, go for a walk,
AussieMummySince07 2 months ago
@AussieMummySince07 do you have a beach near you? Ive always found the beach to be so calming and relaxing when im stressed or upset... At least you have your husband there to help out and take over when you have reached your limit- a luxury i dont have unfortunately...
I know its hard now, but try to keep reminding yourself that it wont last- things WILL get better and you will be ok and get through it :) xxx
AussieMummySince07 2 months ago
I admire your honesty & willingness to share an oh so common bump we all have encountered at some point. love
Shannindhall 2 months ago
I'm typing 1 handed, but I so wanted to write you. My middle child, Peyton was extremely high needs. She ran on a very high volt even as a baby. There were somedays where I had to say, "to hell w/ dishes, laundry" and I would load up a stroller & hit a park. Just breathing fresh air & out of our confining 4 walls was healing, But also if bedtime is your only break...fill up a tub & start a book you've wanted to read.
Shannindhall 2 months ago
I hear U! I'm a stay at home mommy now too after working for 15 years...with a degree & it's been quite the ridE!! Most of my friends have kids so every1 is busy...Just being home all the time gets u kinda' down...& when I'm home I'm constantly doing something...Laundry, cleaning, paying bills, organizing...etc. it's a challenge but let's hang in there for our lil' ones! I have a lil' boy & he is a hand FuLL, he's so strong & wants his way all the time...physically draining but aLL worth it! =)
CooKieChiKy 2 months ago
... Cont
Thought I'd give it a try! - good luck! :)
moovers3 2 months ago
Hope you're able to get some "me" time. Not a mom (yet) but getting ready to do IVF. Husband isn't scared of twins but I've always been a bit more hesitant at the thought... Putting it in God's hands. Rumor has it He doesn't give us more than we can handle. You're videos are great (and HONEST) . Maybe you could get a part-time job for just a few hours on the weekend or evenings?... You do hair right- Maybe a traveling hairstylist? You're probably rolling your eyes at these ideas, but though
moovers3 2 months ago
Hey Sarah, I have such a deep appreciation for your sincere honesty. I could literally feel your energy. Just so you know babe: Always remember to take care of you emotionally, spiritually, physically, etc so you can be the best mom that you can be to those beautiful babies. They need you, however, you need you also. Sometimes, I find that complete silence helps me to clear my head and just allow my thoughts to run free! Men will never totally get it. I wish you mental peace & strength.
xervia3032 2 months ago
When he throws fits, would it be feasible to remove yourself from him (leave the room, turn away, remove him from the room)...deprive him of any attention (assuming, of course, that you know he's perfectly fine) so he starts to associate a negative reaction to his fits? I wish you the best. I appreciate your honesty.
ShawncieGirl 2 months ago in playlist Raising Our Twins: Logan & Quinn
I can relate to this feeling. I usually feel like this at least twice a week. I'm an airforce wife and 30+ hours from all my family and friends. The "Me" i used to be is gone. I no longer get to be me, I'm mommy now. My husband doesn't understand at all when I try to discribe this feeling to him but I'd say it's as close to physical pain as you can get emotionally. I had my son young so my friends aren't parents and have stopped answering my calls... Parenting isn't all sunshine :/
ShelbyandkyleD 2 months ago
awwww sweetie, keep your head held up high. I am not a sahm but I am a single mother of 3 miracles. I too know how you feel. I know its hard but this will pass. Life may be hard but it will in due time get better. Always keep your head up and know that you were put here to be their mother, you were chosen out of everyone to parent those two precious miracles. No one said it would be easy, but it sure is worth it!! Smile!!
heatherandmatt42608 2 months ago
Do you think your friends would be interested in mommy/child play dates? Try aiming for once a month and see how it goes. It doesn't have to be a big production. Don't attempt a Martha Stewart event. Most mommies are used to eating their kid's leftovers anyways. Also, if you can get away try a random class- yoga, jazzercise, hip hop, whatever. Most places offer first class free and you can buy 10 classes for x amount of money with no expiration date. Try bouncing from free class to free class
jlguttman44 2 months ago
Oh and did I mention my kid never likes anything I cook for him..its a challenge to find something he'll eat. Somedays I'm like here eat a cookie..just so he doesn't go hungry then I feel like a bad mom.. hubs doesn't get that I need time to myself but then he's not with him 24/7 either..men r so stupid
jsandlin08 2 months ago
Oh sweet Sarah, my heart is expanding to hold your heart in peace and love. This too shall pass. Have you told any of your friends with kids how you feel, I bet they would totally relate and MAKE time for you. What about a babysitter share or swap? I also urge you to try meditation or self-hypnosis, you can find lots of guided ones on youtube....soooo totally free!!! Sending you so much love, peace and hope. xo
ashleycsal1 2 months ago
Omg.. sarah I was having the same kind of day as u today.. i m a sahm to a 17mo old and I don't even know who the hell I am..what do I like anymore.brayden does this Nellie Olsen cry and omg.. i d rather pour hot wax in my ears. I wish we lived close..maybe we cld skype sometime or chit chat on the phone.. we are literally in the exact situation
jsandlin08 2 months ago
Sorry, that should have said whatever YOU like. Haha oops.
NikJoCandy 2 months ago
I know how you feel. I don't have twins, but I have a 3 year old and a 3 mth old (and nursing) and sometimes it just feels like the walls are going to cave in. But as everyone here says, it DOES get better. Even if your husband can take the kids out for a couple hours so you can have a nice bath with a glass of wine and a book (or whatever YOU), it can really recharge your batteries.
Take care, keep on truckin'. (?! Whatever that means) :)
NikJoCandy 2 months ago
Sending some encouragement and positive energy your way. :)
MsBsoulDiva 2 months ago
Things do get better just keep remembering that! Soon your babies will be your best friends to call. My daughter had colic for a year and I cried that whole year and now shes 4 and i just had my son hes 10 months and he doesnt have colic but hes always fussing all day everyday but i know now it does get better and the lonleyness and wanting to go out and be you agian will come, just be strong you will get yourself back I promise!!!!!
LovelyWife6655 2 months ago 2
Oh hun what you are going through is part of Post postpartum depression. It also sounds like anxiety as well. Please Talk to your doctor about this, before it gets worse. I went through PPD as did my midwife, she ended up in the hospital for 10 days. I see it on your face , the way your body language is. I am not a Doctor, but I have experience with this, not only first hand but I have a masters degree in Psych and I have done studies and papers on this.
hartrose33 2 months ago
@hartrose33 Could it be postpartum a year after they were born? I could be wrong but I thought that happened like in the few months after you gave birth.
LeavingForVenus 2 months ago
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hartrose33 2 months ago
@LeavingForVenus up to years after giving birth.
hartrose33 2 months ago
So sorry you're feeling like this. I appreciate your honesty b/c I agree that being a mom somedays is really tough and lonely & it's probably doubly so for you. What made you most happy before the babies? Could you get a night off where you get to take a long bath, listen to favorite music, call a friend, paint your toenails, etc? Maybe you can plan ahead to hang with a mom friend who probably needs a break too. Schedule it for a week or 2 from now. Hang in there, it will get better!
katulka2 2 months ago
Oh, and I should probably mention that I ran away to my bedroom after my hubs came home and I'm sitting here watching YouTube on my phone with my headphones in. Mommy's in a time out.
BoutiqueMomma 2 months ago
I also had the heart issue, mine skipped every fourth beat..., it was benign and stress related. This too will get better once your little devil calms down. You're an amazing mother, taking care of two kids, you might not feel like it right now but you are! I wish I could just pick up the phone and talk to you in person. Again, hang in there, this will pass! So sorry!
dimpleza 2 months ago
im a new mom of twin girls mines r 6months it gets veryyyyyyyy over welmin i kno ur pain! seriousli we sometimes gotaaaa take a breather butt i feel noone understands us as mom of twins one of twins yellll n has tantrums n she doesnt stop n den 2nd min shes laughin den bak to crying wen everything is well wit her
Jenniifer718 2 months ago
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I was just saying this to my husband. a whole year at home. Who the hell am I. I went for a walk today and spent 30 minutes talking to a mormon who gave me a flyer. Normally I would not talk to them but I was so desperate to talk to someone. How pathetic huh. I went to the emergency room because I had a heart palpitations and they prescribed me larazapam. only take it when I need it but damn it works! I am thinking about you hun. I hope things get better. I wish I could visit you.
PeskyPCOS 2 months ago
Oh Sarah, i'm so sorry you're going through this, I've been there, I have a 15 month old, and shortly before he turned one, he was a mess for about two months... I mean I hate to say it but I felt like giving him away. I could not take it any more!!! The only thing that saved my sanity was to carry him on my back in a baby backpack. Try to meet with your friends who are moms too and go for a walk, with the kids in a stroller and VENT!!!!!!! This WILL pass, I promise!!
dimpleza 2 months ago
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PeskyPCOS 2 months ago
It's like watching myself...you're definitely not alone. (((HUGS)))
BoutiqueMomma 2 months ago
I feel ya! Im a mom of 5 and ya every thing you said is part of being a mommy . Its not always pretty! Im glad you did this video because this is REALY life ! Its not always unicorns and rainbows! Lots of people just arnt as honest as you!
zalla27 2 months ago
Ah honey you sound so stressed. My sister went through something similar and finally she just went to a counsellor so that she could bounce ideas off of in order to figure out who she was outside of just being a mother to a toddler. She wasn't depressed, just frustrated as hell and didn't know what to do next outside of chasing after her son. Sometimes the local public library has events that go on or visiting a local gallery is free. Even local community centers my have free events.
wrenslifejourney 2 months ago
So sorry to hear about your situation. I'm sure it happens to most moms of multiples. The feeling you have of the palpitations and that feeling of like a burp stuck between your heart and throat happens to me usually before I get an anxiety attack. I've learned to control it with meditation. I understand that financially it is hard perhaps have play dates with friends where the kids get to play while you connect with your girls or maybe try doing some makeup work from your house part time.
dwtbb 2 months ago in playlist Raising Our Twins: Logan & Quinn
The joys of mother hood is not always a joy. I feel your pain. I don't have twins, but I have a daughter. She's 7 now, but I remember all those days when life was just blah and all I heard was crying.. I hope you feel better soon. You just need to get out of the house for a night or two. Don't feel guilty about it. Mommy's need time to themselves too. I know it sounds lame, but when I wanted to get away sometimes, I'd wander around the dollar store and walk down every isle. Anything helps.
eyelovemec 2 months ago
And the other suggestion-try to find some time-even if you are holding him to dive into a book. This often time would help me to keep my mind sharp. Even escaping for a few minutes can take away some of those mommy blues! Hope this helped!
MommyLuv027 2 months ago
As a mommy of twins, I can understand where you are coming from! This happened to me too. I had one that was usually fine, and then one that was always fussing about something. And I was a stay at home mommy as well. You give so much of yourself that you feel empty at the end of the day,...and it can feel quite depressing. I have two suggestions for you. 1-check his diet and make sure that he hasn't developed any food intolerances and doesnt have a tummy ache-
MommyLuv027 2 months ago
Hello Sarah ! i would like to send you something if can give me a private msg here with a postal address so i can send it when i get a chance, if your not cool with that its ok no probs, Take care hun. peace n love.
sabrinacoolest 2 months ago