I adore this man for leaving the restaurant. Thank you so much for doing this.
We living in the time crisis and that means people work for less and get more humiliated than ever before in order to keep their jobs. We desperately need kindness and politeness. Nobody has the right to treat people like shit. Please don;t ;ever change. Now is the right time to be polite!
Stephen is not trying to make a big deal about "Please and Thank You", what he is stressing is showing kindness, courtesy and consideration towards others. These things maybe old fashioned and out dated but I still adhere to them.
"It's just his way" is an expression Mr. Fry used. I heard that as a child and took it to mean "that person is an ass and will never try to change". If I heard the expression used about someone I knew to avoid him or her. Stephen Fry was almost born an American--see Stephen Fry's In America television porgram. Our loss :( What an amazing man.
Darling Mr Fry, never ever apologise for your politeness...tis what makes you a shining beacon of eccentric Englishness in a world of dumbed down bleakness
Please visit my channel for the unpopular truth about homosexuality.
A person does not need hatred or any kind of phobia in order to acknowledge important differences between heterosexual attraction / behavior / marriage / adoption and homosexual attraction / behavior / marriage / adoption. Even non-religious people know this.
Homosexual activists, with support from the media, have succeeded at framing themselves as noble victims; it's an effective way to push a social agenda.
@natalie6576 I think others talk more about his being gay and make jokes at his expense. He's also bipolar and, oh, what a bore he is about that, eh? (Sarcasm intended).
I have the same problem and I understand what he means when he says it's not a positive thing. A lot of people have told me it comes across as a sort of weakness. One person told me to stop sucking up to people.
@natalie6576 yes many times and if I could sum that book up in a few words it would "sorry for existing" that book is one of the most self deprecating things I've ever read, there is no smugness init what so ever
Why is that stupid, OrangePete? If you believe that homosexuality is a condition one is born into, then it must be controlled by a gene, just as politeness. Why is it so hard to believe that the two genes may have some sort of connection?
i see nothing wrong in being polite, and saying please and thank you. it's basic respect for other human beings... especially when you are in a position of power over someone. and i think people who are cold and distant most of the time, occasionally throwing the rest of us a bone and making us "melt" are really just passive-aggressive gits.
@Pinters44 Politest works aswell but the term "most polite" as more sense, since adjectives with 3 syllables or more use "most" or "least" in their superlative form.
If it wasn't for one line in a Dan le Sac song I randomly came across on youtube, "Thou shalt not question Stephen Fry ", I never would have discovered this brilliant man. Long live Fry.
I try to watch the video but find myself watching the bar, slowly coming to the end, hoping it will suddenly extend tenfold so I can listen to Mr. Fry longer.
I wish I knew anyone one that considered themselves to polite.
I think manners are dieing and the fact that someone stephen finds it important to the point where he thinks his going over board gives me hope.
Because as a role model none could find a man any higher and with hope he maybe seen as cool, hip or whatever the latest statement maybe and people may follow his lead.
@sockington1 So funny that you use that kind of language in a video about politeness. Do you know what would make us all leave youtube like we left TV? If we had to pay to watch!
So, thank these ads for allowing youtube to provide us with videos for free even though Google is still losing money on it, and for allowing authors to create content and receive a small compensation for it! Quit being a whining baby, and realize nothing is free in this world!
@simobk Funny how you create a false assumption between cursing and politeness, when Stephen Fry thoroughly agrees on using curse words, frequently in fact.
@sockington1 We are still forced to pay for a TV license even if we don't own a TV—one of the reasons being viewing online—so why the fuck do we have them on Youtube.
How sad that this man feels there is something wrong with him for practicing and appreciating politeness. Obsequiousness is one thing, but common courtesy is a lubricant to human interactions, it makes everything easier for all those involved.
@m1c1fraser It is because the world service is not financed by the British public like the normal BBC. It gets its money from the foreign office and also adverts.
@m1c1fraser BBC worldwide is not BBC world service....it is the wholly owned commercial arm of the BBC and as such uses various commercial means to raise money which is then channelled back to the Corporation as additional funding for the organisation. Wiki has a well researched entry on BBC worldwide.
@maybeindeed I guess its out of politeness then that the crusaders from England went and tried to take the holy land. Religion is not all holyness and spiritualism. Some of it is harsh and dark as well. Stephen Fry isnt religious in anyway but he believes that people have a right to believe what they want.
However i am inclined to agree, if i am perfectly honest infact; i think he deserves a knight hood.
Stephen, it is so nice that you are polite and pleasing to others. I do not know why you want to get rid of this part of yourself. I hope you can value it as much as we do, i.e. those who are commenting here. I appreciate you for this quaility and see it is part of who you are and what makes you so very special. You are sincere and authentic, and that is what matters most. If other people have a problem with your politeness and wanting to please, then that is their problem and not your yours.
I want to put him, Naomi Cambell and either a flight attendant or a maid in the same room and observe what happens ;D And it seems his polite behaviour is more altruistic and considerate rather than decietful and manipulative so I dont see what his problem is. I do appreciate authentic emotion tho
I suspect what Cleese was suggesting might have been that politeness is a very structured behaviour that *can* be used as a defense against authentic emotional response. A formal place setting at a dinner table provides a safe structural boundary against the primal chaotic impulses of killing, eating and devouring but if we put these impulses in a cage, they eventually wither and die and we die along with them. Maybe Dr Jekyll needs to let Mr Fryde out of his cage every now and then.
Why are there any dislikes of this interview? I believe that the more people in this world could listen to and grasp Stephen's message the more better off humanity would be.
People don't expect me to be polite at first (I think it's because of a slightly intimidating demeanour,) but when I speak they seem delighted at how friendly I am, and in turn makes me feel a little better about myself, which begs the question,why do people feel they have to be incosiderate to other peoplewhen being kind makes everybody feel good?
I was very impolite as a child and was often told to say my "please"s and "thank you"s, now I feel like a dick if I don't say thank you (though I still feel a little subserviant to say "please," I do still ask for things in a polite tone, rather than demand, but perhaps that still means I'm not as polite as I think I am) and find myself thinking similarly of others who don't say thanks when ordering/receiving food, or something.
I think the world of Stephen Fry, but here perhaps he should set aside "polite" and draw a distinction between being courteous and being unctious and/or obsequious. Yes, you can be too polite--to the point of crawling; and I know people who may not say "Thank you" but may still make you feel acknowledged. In contrast, his dinner companion was plain rude because he knew he could get away with it. I doubt he would have behaved that way towards, say, the Duke of Edinburgh.Rude is rude.
manners and politeness should make life easier - does not function when not all keep to it (manners cement classes) - therefore: those with manners should be generous towards those who were not brought up like that and see what politeness was meant for, and when it gets disturbing (or seems arrogant) just drop it that is more gentleman like than teaching others...Stephen Fry is great and a nice gent (and chap) who should relax much more (chew gums sometimes:-)
Well if you think about it, we are, in one way or another, selfish, no matter what type of person we may be. It is a necessary human characteristic. If we are not selfish, we do not look out for ourselves, and that could put us at risk for many types of things. There does come a time and point that you want to do something for yourself, rather than another, but the problem herein lies with the fact that people define that as base of selfishness, when in a socio-reality, it's not.
People in the UK should not have to watch these fucking adverts! I pay my tv license so i don't have to watch ad's. Sort it out BBC or ill bomb one of your buildings! lol
Good manners cost nothing. Being polite is an endearing quality and those who are coarse and rude are not worthy of any respect, ever.
It is better to be polite and then brusque when required than the other way around. Michael deserved stabbing in the car park afterwards. For which I'd have apologised profusely. "terribly sorry for doing that, old chap, but you were acting like a twat!"
..He WAS considered the most polite man in Britain but now because of some harmless comment he made about Women & Sex in some Newspaper he is now being attacked left, right and centre by every filthy unwashed feminist dyke out there.
@ClTIZEN Yeah and also, apart from being such a stupid thing to say, what would you prefer? That he was full of himself and showed it? Then you'd just moan about that.
See, what you wrote makes no sense no matter how you look at it. Ive just wasted 5 minutes of my life trying. LOL.
I cannot think of anything I don't like about Stephen Fry. I wish I could meet him - he's the reason I'm on twitter and I swore I would NEVER go anywhere near that!
Stephen is a big, big man. He is light that shines in a dark world. If one had to do CPR on him it would have to be carried out on his arm, because he wears his heart on his sleeve. My wife, my friends, and I am so disappointed that the Kingdom series was discontinued.
Quite simply...Fry= god among men. Well not literally a god....I know you're an atheist Stephen.....I would hate to be in-polite and offend you....... actually...forget I said anything....I would hate to offend!
I totally relate to him when it comes to being polite to the waiter or waitress. I cannot stand going out to eat with someone and having them treat the staff as if they're their own personal slave. It's disgusting behavior and I won't stand for it. There was a time once when I when out with some friends and they were beyond rude to the waitress. I was being polite but I felt extremely bad for the poor girl. I went back to the restaurant, apologized for their behavior and left her a big tip.
@FreeAmericanRepublic as a chef in a british pub i've got to say you're spot on.in the smaller towns theres still alot of politeness/respect but in more urban places like mine its shocking the lack of it.sometimes the odd genuine thankyou makes an otherwise hateful job quite bearable.
@FreeAmericanRepublic You sound like a nice person. When I was a waitress I was never treated badly but some of my colleagues were and it was awful to watch. My mum brought me up to be incredibly polite and I am so pleased she did. It's nice to be nice to other people. People, whoever they are, deserve to be treated with respect. Treat others how you would like to be treated yourself...
Being rude to waiters, dancers, porters, etc. is unacceptable. I would walk out too.
However I do see his point about how being overly polite, while charming at first, can become quite grating quite quickly. Which isn't to say that it is okay, as he said, to bully people.
If you say 'Fuck You' as you're turning away from someone they hear it as 'Thank You' and respond as such. This also works on small children, police officers and the elderly.
nothing wring with extending kindness, the world could benefit from more of it...i had a similar experience with a family member - they were being so rude the the waiter, all they could do about past injustices done to them by others. the waiter was much stronger than i was...when i later apologized 'on the other person's behalf' he just laughed and said not to worry about it....i admired him for knowing that such things do not inform his sense of self. a lesson i took to heart.
It's hard to shrug off politeness, Growing up trying to please your parents, It becomes habitual even when it isn't necessary. What is worse are people who are painfully inoffensive, those people piss me off.
Nothing wrong with presenting as a thoroughly decent guy. Some say that niceness is the way that weak people pay into the party when they lack the guts to be tough or the class to be brilliant. Stephen Fry at least disproves the latter.
There is no such a thing as too polite. The world would be better place if EVERYBODY was more polite.
By the way, if you are an arrogant and rude rich guy and you are often rude to people who serves you be sure, be very sure that you have already eaten a lot of gross things from your food without knowing. It is a certainty, if you are being rude to waiters they are spitting on your plate, mixing your orange juice with the extra sugar you demanded it with their cocks etc. I've often seen it...
I used to be a waiter and its a big mistake to be rude to them,they could do something foul to your food.I wouldn't but some would.Being rude is ignorant and shows your a tit.
It pains me to say so, but I can't exactly bring myself to chime in with Stephen on this one... if there's one sure indicator of 'bourgeois' behaviour, it's being rude to waiters...
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It is not a crime to be polite to people. Just because others may behave beastly doesn't make the considerate one peculiar -- rare, maybe.
I think Fry's angst about his politeness is connected to his homosexuality. The gay boys are the good boys: they say "please" and "thank you." Their instincts are to be accomodating to others, a trait often interpreted as weakness.
Fry is really complaining about being perceived as being gay, Why can't I be as rude as the straight boys? Your nature.
I don't get how people think being polite is insincere. When I say please, thank you, and you're welcome I mean it. If they take it in the wrong way, then I can't do anything about it lol. That's funny I don't think I've encountered overpolitness, but I have seen and heard sarcastic politeness, that's easy to spot.
Anyways, to the haterzzz Stephen always touches his nose, it's a habit. If you're going to critisise about the smallest things, you're really pathetic.
MI ÌDOLO ME TUMBÈ CON DE PROFUNDIS SU CARTA A DOUGLAS BOSIE...UN GRAN REFERENTE MI AMOR PLATÒNICO DESDE NIÑA QUE LEÌ EL PRÌNCIPE FELIZ...SI HUBIERAS VIVIDO EN ESTA ÈPOCA O YO EN LA TUYA NO IBAS A LA CÀRCEL NUNCA YO LO IMPEDÌA... MI NOVELA DIOS ES GAY GOD IS GAY QUE APOYÒ A OBAMA LA PUSE EN SU WEBB PARA QUE LA LEAN GRATIS Y VOTEN POR OBAMA LA DEDICO A OSCAR WILDE ... ROCK HUDSON -STEPHEN FRI Y LOS GAYS DEL MUNDO...el amor no tiene sexo...gaviota
I adore this Man. Not only is he Highly Intellectual, Funny, Kind, he also has this amazing ability to reach out and endear himself to people of all Social Classes. A True Gentleman.
This comment has received too many negative votesshow
don't talk about how reaching out to different classes is hard....everyone is a human.....fuck you bitchass shithead .... if i saw you laying on the street in pain I would simply ignore you. Dick.
AMAZING ABILITY TO REACH OUT TO ALL SOCIAL CLASSES . HA. GO TO HELL YOU DIRTY LITTLE BENDER.
@rockchick80s Yes indeed. By using a wide vocabulary would cleverly make anyone seem intelligent. It is a quite simple way of getting thumbs up. Shall I get some approving thumbs up as well?
What a man Fry is. He isn't some righteous bigot who thinks that politeness is a necessity as I actually would have expected. He recognises that it is important to have all types of people except those that cause serious harm.
I've always found people's treatment of waitstaff to be a very accurate measure of what they're actually like, rather than the face they're trying to present. The fellow he was eating with sounds like a prick.
I mean it in the traditionally understood sense of the word- to refer to people whose work or economic status is lower than yours. Certainly, Fry and his television and film friends occupy a higher socio-economic rung than a waiter. Of course, that doesn't put them on a higher moral rung.
We all know how the expression "my
We both agree, I'm sure, that being obnoxious or failing to thank people for what they do for you is appalling.
He isn't saying it's wrong to be polite, he's saying is wrong to be 'over'-polite. The very definition of 'over' in that context is, 'too much'.
I think he's right. I tend to be over-polite myself, and then people will doubt your saying, opinion etc.
Although, I think that we've somehow lost the definition of 'politeness', it's not about continually repeating words like "Thanks". It's being considerate and acknowledge, to make people comfortable and happy. That isn't horrible at all.
I agree he is a bit over polite but that is still better then rude or cruel. Just something about rude and cruel people that makes me want to chop them up and feed them to dogs.
A controllable impulse in these 'civilized' times. Such an action may teach a few manners toward strangers, for you can never truly know what is in a strangers head or how capable they are of being just as ugly in a more violent way.
Too bad most people think they are safe enough to be rude and cruel; they aren't.
Maybe, but, at least here in the US, the overwhelming sense of entitlement that people carry with them makes them downright narcissistic and rude. It seems to me that people are losing their ability to be polite because they think it's insincere, but the reality is, it's about recognizing there is someone else in the world besides you. I wish more people were polite. I wish more people thought about others before they let themselves behave however they want.
I really like Stephen Fry. It makes me sad to hear that he thinks the niceties and courtesies of life are weakness. Being considerate and sensitive to the needs of others are qualities that are all too rare. Unfortunately there will always be those who take advantage of a "gentleman" for example, wasssuppp08.
Do not apologize for being polite. Good manners never go out of fashion; rudeness, however, always is.
LeFeff 2 weeks ago
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I adore this man for leaving the restaurant. Thank you so much for doing this.
We living in the time crisis and that means people work for less and get more humiliated than ever before in order to keep their jobs. We desperately need kindness and politeness. Nobody has the right to treat people like shit. Please don;t ;ever change. Now is the right time to be polite!
jazzlap 3 weeks ago
Comment removed
jazzlap 3 weeks ago
Stephen is not trying to make a big deal about "Please and Thank You", what he is stressing is showing kindness, courtesy and consideration towards others. These things maybe old fashioned and out dated but I still adhere to them.
Thereisonlythemoment 3 weeks ago in playlist Language and Society
"It's just his way" is an expression Mr. Fry used. I heard that as a child and took it to mean "that person is an ass and will never try to change". If I heard the expression used about someone I knew to avoid him or her. Stephen Fry was almost born an American--see Stephen Fry's In America television porgram. Our loss :( What an amazing man.
flowerpotent 1 month ago
Darling Mr Fry, never ever apologise for your politeness...tis what makes you a shining beacon of eccentric Englishness in a world of dumbed down bleakness
sallyjenkins22 2 months ago 11
If i could marry Stephen Fry i would :') <3
EvalinaxCullen 2 months ago 3
Stephen Fry is one of the last true Englishman.
TheIncredibleD1701 2 months ago 3
It's really very unfortunate that 'politeness' is often seen as a weakness.
I've always thought that politeness was a good virtue?
These days it seems to be an invite for exploitation by people who really should know better.
:d*
ArcadePerfect 3 months ago 5
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Please visit my channel for the unpopular truth about homosexuality.
A person does not need hatred or any kind of phobia in order to acknowledge important differences between heterosexual attraction / behavior / marriage / adoption and homosexual attraction / behavior / marriage / adoption. Even non-religious people know this.
Homosexual activists, with support from the media, have succeeded at framing themselves as noble victims; it's an effective way to push a social agenda.
lightandbeautiful 3 months ago
I am too nice, so I know how he feels.
Pppuuma 3 months ago
Mark Lawson's mouth-twitching, jaw-jutting tic is really irritating.
nakedmambo 3 months ago
@natalie6576 I think others talk more about his being gay and make jokes at his expense. He's also bipolar and, oh, what a bore he is about that, eh? (Sarcasm intended).
spacecowboy5000 4 months ago
I have the same problem and I understand what he means when he says it's not a positive thing. A lot of people have told me it comes across as a sort of weakness. One person told me to stop sucking up to people.
spacecowboy5000 4 months ago
manners maketh man.
CobinRain 5 months ago
@natalie6576 yes many times and if I could sum that book up in a few words it would "sorry for existing" that book is one of the most self deprecating things I've ever read, there is no smugness init what so ever
255ad 5 months ago
@natalie6576 what do you man and what makes you think he's smug?
255ad 5 months ago
Why is that stupid, OrangePete? If you believe that homosexuality is a condition one is born into, then it must be controlled by a gene, just as politeness. Why is it so hard to believe that the two genes may have some sort of connection?
TheRealSyFyGuy 5 months ago
i see nothing wrong in being polite, and saying please and thank you. it's basic respect for other human beings... especially when you are in a position of power over someone. and i think people who are cold and distant most of the time, occasionally throwing the rest of us a bone and making us "melt" are really just passive-aggressive gits.
0deer7 6 months ago 2
It's 'politest', B B Fucking C.
Pinters44 6 months ago
@Pinters44 What? are you retarded? mentally deficient?
Most politest? i guffawed.
Souless1231 6 months ago
@Souless1231 No, I wrote 'politest', not 'most politest'. And yes, I am a retard; thank you for asking.
Pinters44 6 months ago
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@Pinters44 Yes you did, but the title is 'Most polite' and you said
'it's 'politest', B B Fucking C.' Their sentence made perfect sense, There was no reason for you to have ago at their grammar.
Souless1231 6 months ago
@Pinters44 Politest works aswell but the term "most polite" as more sense, since adjectives with 3 syllables or more use "most" or "least" in their superlative form.
PedrocasMS 6 months ago
Fuck Tic Tacs - The ad that I had to watch
naythechocolatehead 7 months ago
I don't think he's the most polite, but he might be a contender for the most smug.
MrTobytwirl 7 months ago
@MrTobytwirl Thats not very polite.
mypackageisthebomb 7 months ago
love him, but this is partially bollocks. He's rude as shit to Alan Davies lol
The1stPoster 7 months ago 2
Nothing wrong with being polite
GreensongOakheart 7 months ago
If it wasn't for one line in a Dan le Sac song I randomly came across on youtube, "Thou shalt not question Stephen Fry ", I never would have discovered this brilliant man. Long live Fry.
Shadrach1 7 months ago
I try to watch the video but find myself watching the bar, slowly coming to the end, hoping it will suddenly extend tenfold so I can listen to Mr. Fry longer.
peuterschmidt 7 months ago 3
I would love to make Stephen Fry melt.
trailstar1 8 months ago 4
Most darling man in the world!
DragonSporks 8 months ago
As Oscar Wilde himself said: A true gentleman is someone who never insults anyone......unintentionally.
ArchhereticK 8 months ago 3
I wish I knew anyone one that considered themselves to polite.
I think manners are dieing and the fact that someone stephen finds it important to the point where he thinks his going over board gives me hope.
Because as a role model none could find a man any higher and with hope he maybe seen as cool, hip or whatever the latest statement maybe and people may follow his lead.
But class never dies.
So Stephen is immortal.
Caladors 9 months ago 2
Stephen Fry's wittyness is what makes him so funny, however his amazing sense of humor doesn't hurt...
mrloudogggy 9 months ago
ADVERTS FUCK OFF - THIS IS WHY WE TURNED OUR TV'S OFF
sockington1 10 months ago 163
@sockington1 Adverts or pay. I choose adverts.
Anyway, I thought we turned of our TV's because of annoying scheduling and lowest denominator programming?
CmdrTobs 7 months ago
@sockington1 or you could get a working ad blocker.. I have no ads whatsoever on any video in years
DeanMalenko 7 months ago
@sockington1
Get Firefox mate.
Dancingwithotters 7 months ago
@sockington1 But in all fairness, without them there would be a subscription fee
allydoodah 3 months ago
@allydoodah there was no subscription fee before every clip was plastered with advertising
sockington1 3 months ago
@sockington1 Do you even know why that was?! omfg its like talking to a child....
allydoodah 3 months ago
@sockington1 Firefox + adblock plus = Bliss ... =)
echoingheads 3 months ago
@sockington1 So funny that you use that kind of language in a video about politeness. Do you know what would make us all leave youtube like we left TV? If we had to pay to watch!
So, thank these ads for allowing youtube to provide us with videos for free even though Google is still losing money on it, and for allowing authors to create content and receive a small compensation for it! Quit being a whining baby, and realize nothing is free in this world!
simobk 3 weeks ago 3
@simobk Funny how you create a false assumption between cursing and politeness, when Stephen Fry thoroughly agrees on using curse words, frequently in fact.
Etrajbe 3 weeks ago
@Etrajbe You do realize this was just an introduction and my comment wasn't about that huh?
simobk 3 weeks ago
@sockington1 We are still forced to pay for a TV license even if we don't own a TV—one of the reasons being viewing online—so why the fuck do we have them on Youtube.
culturebloc 3 weeks ago
How sad that this man feels there is something wrong with him for practicing and appreciating politeness. Obsequiousness is one thing, but common courtesy is a lubricant to human interactions, it makes everything easier for all those involved.
LordBalliol 10 months ago 39
@LordBalliol Hehehe. "Lubricant".
TheIncredibleD1701 2 months ago
Can someone tell me why a BBCWorldservice video has an advert at the beginning of it?
Also, I love the way that Fry interrupts the man to tell him how polite he is. C'=
m1c1fraser 10 months ago
@m1c1fraser It is because the world service is not financed by the British public like the normal BBC. It gets its money from the foreign office and also adverts.
ashlawn10h 8 months ago
@m1c1fraser BBC worldwide is not BBC world service....it is the wholly owned commercial arm of the BBC and as such uses various commercial means to raise money which is then channelled back to the Corporation as additional funding for the organisation. Wiki has a well researched entry on BBC worldwide.
pjdonagh 8 months ago
He uses these words no more than any average Canadian, so im good with that.
MeesterFeely 11 months ago
@maybeindeed I guess its out of politeness then that the crusaders from England went and tried to take the holy land. Religion is not all holyness and spiritualism. Some of it is harsh and dark as well. Stephen Fry isnt religious in anyway but he believes that people have a right to believe what they want.
However i am inclined to agree, if i am perfectly honest infact; i think he deserves a knight hood.
Sir Steven Fry
limitlessreborn 11 months ago 4
Stephen, it is so nice that you are polite and pleasing to others. I do not know why you want to get rid of this part of yourself. I hope you can value it as much as we do, i.e. those who are commenting here. I appreciate you for this quaility and see it is part of who you are and what makes you so very special. You are sincere and authentic, and that is what matters most. If other people have a problem with your politeness and wanting to please, then that is their problem and not your yours.
YesWeCanCamperVan 11 months ago 2
"Let Latinos be charming". OK, I would say -Let Anglosaxons be real.
miguelucho20008 11 months ago
such a horrible thing, being a well-mannered, educated, polite person...
Putaspellonyou 11 months ago 7
I want to put him, Naomi Cambell and either a flight attendant or a maid in the same room and observe what happens ;D And it seems his polite behaviour is more altruistic and considerate rather than decietful and manipulative so I dont see what his problem is. I do appreciate authentic emotion tho
1982mockingbird1982 1 year ago 2
I suspect what Cleese was suggesting might have been that politeness is a very structured behaviour that *can* be used as a defense against authentic emotional response. A formal place setting at a dinner table provides a safe structural boundary against the primal chaotic impulses of killing, eating and devouring but if we put these impulses in a cage, they eventually wither and die and we die along with them. Maybe Dr Jekyll needs to let Mr Fryde out of his cage every now and then.
Hufflewaffle 1 year ago 2
Why are there any dislikes of this interview? I believe that the more people in this world could listen to and grasp Stephen's message the more better off humanity would be.
BBJinc71 1 year ago 3
I would Use Toyota technology to stop this fucking ADS
GmanVid 1 year ago
Stephen, we love you just the way you are!
MissJagUR 1 year ago 2
how to be fake, a guide through life
esrapk 1 year ago
just had an add while feelinng depressing
octogarden72 1 year ago
People don't expect me to be polite at first (I think it's because of a slightly intimidating demeanour,) but when I speak they seem delighted at how friendly I am, and in turn makes me feel a little better about myself, which begs the question,why do people feel they have to be incosiderate to other peoplewhen being kind makes everybody feel good?
TirnanUFC 1 year ago 3
Oh, how I would love to be one of those people who has made Stephen Fry ''melt''.
Nerd042 1 year ago 3
rude is the new polite
tribeofcurators 1 year ago
I was very impolite as a child and was often told to say my "please"s and "thank you"s, now I feel like a dick if I don't say thank you (though I still feel a little subserviant to say "please," I do still ask for things in a polite tone, rather than demand, but perhaps that still means I'm not as polite as I think I am) and find myself thinking similarly of others who don't say thanks when ordering/receiving food, or something.
Shindai 1 year ago
I think the world of Stephen Fry, but here perhaps he should set aside "polite" and draw a distinction between being courteous and being unctious and/or obsequious. Yes, you can be too polite--to the point of crawling; and I know people who may not say "Thank you" but may still make you feel acknowledged. In contrast, his dinner companion was plain rude because he knew he could get away with it. I doubt he would have behaved that way towards, say, the Duke of Edinburgh.Rude is rude.
jph3660 1 year ago
I love this man!
Growlertrim 1 year ago
manners and politeness should make life easier - does not function when not all keep to it (manners cement classes) - therefore: those with manners should be generous towards those who were not brought up like that and see what politeness was meant for, and when it gets disturbing (or seems arrogant) just drop it that is more gentleman like than teaching others...Stephen Fry is great and a nice gent (and chap) who should relax much more (chew gums sometimes:-)
khi590 1 year ago
Nothing wrong with being polite, I was always brought up to be polite:)
stargazermedia 1 year ago 3
Might he also be the best dressed man in Britain? Look at that tie, shirt and suit combo. Elegance.
theFriendlyHughes 1 year ago
Well if you think about it, we are, in one way or another, selfish, no matter what type of person we may be. It is a necessary human characteristic. If we are not selfish, we do not look out for ourselves, and that could put us at risk for many types of things. There does come a time and point that you want to do something for yourself, rather than another, but the problem herein lies with the fact that people define that as base of selfishness, when in a socio-reality, it's not.
LZLandingZone 1 year ago 3
it's nice to be nice to the nice...
FUwogs 1 year ago 3
People in the UK should not have to watch these fucking adverts! I pay my tv license so i don't have to watch ad's. Sort it out BBC or ill bomb one of your buildings! lol
RyanLFC86 1 year ago
This is bollocks!
Good manners cost nothing. Being polite is an endearing quality and those who are coarse and rude are not worthy of any respect, ever.
It is better to be polite and then brusque when required than the other way around. Michael deserved stabbing in the car park afterwards. For which I'd have apologised profusely. "terribly sorry for doing that, old chap, but you were acting like a twat!"
moonrockguy 1 year ago
I recongnise myself in him... in the way that I also have those feelings...
merjemke 1 year ago
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MsChelsea76 1 year ago
he's bloody fat in this vid =o
MrsPoker 1 year ago
@MrsPoker and I'm sure you're a picture.....
MsChelsea76 1 year ago 2
@MsChelsea76 ....
MrsPoker 1 year ago
..He WAS considered the most polite man in Britain but now because of some harmless comment he made about Women & Sex in some Newspaper he is now being attacked left, right and centre by every filthy unwashed feminist dyke out there.
Dungarth 1 year ago 7
I wish there were more people like Mr Fry in this world, i really do.
ATVmidlandsUK
ATVmidlands5581 1 year ago 3
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wtf is an arse? it's ass
midevil656 1 year ago
I think Thomas Jefferon said it best, "Be polite to all, but intimate with few" All should be polite to each other.
clay180 1 year ago 4
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I like him, but I think he is up his own arse, he just doesn't show it.
ClTIZEN 1 year ago
@ClTIZEN That has to be one of the dumbest things I ever read in my life.
yatter1 1 year ago 7
@ClTIZEN Yeah and also, apart from being such a stupid thing to say, what would you prefer? That he was full of himself and showed it? Then you'd just moan about that.
See, what you wrote makes no sense no matter how you look at it. Ive just wasted 5 minutes of my life trying. LOL.
LaSeuleEtoile 1 year ago
Oh how great would it be if someone asked me for my worst feature and I could say in response: politeness
JankeyL 1 year ago 21
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OregonAlleyCat 1 year ago
I cannot think of anything I don't like about Stephen Fry. I wish I could meet him - he's the reason I'm on twitter and I swore I would NEVER go anywhere near that!
Rachiejane1 1 year ago 6
Stephen is a big, big man. He is light that shines in a dark world. If one had to do CPR on him it would have to be carried out on his arm, because he wears his heart on his sleeve. My wife, my friends, and I am so disappointed that the Kingdom series was discontinued.
verziehen 1 year ago
Quite simply...Fry= god among men. Well not literally a god....I know you're an atheist Stephen.....I would hate to be in-polite and offend you....... actually...forget I said anything....I would hate to offend!
popejimbo1 1 year ago
@popejimbo1 Hahaha!
Rachiejane1 1 year ago
LOL
xn117 1 year ago
Where's the Black Cap. I will be needing that...
DonMeaker 1 year ago
Why is he apologizing? I don't see anything wrong with being polite. The world would be a richer and happier place if people were more considerate!
roakes1956 1 year ago
Oh my. Give him a job in India! On second thought, that would surely kill him.
SuspendedSky55 1 year ago
I totally relate to him when it comes to being polite to the waiter or waitress. I cannot stand going out to eat with someone and having them treat the staff as if they're their own personal slave. It's disgusting behavior and I won't stand for it. There was a time once when I when out with some friends and they were beyond rude to the waitress. I was being polite but I felt extremely bad for the poor girl. I went back to the restaurant, apologized for their behavior and left her a big tip.
FreeAmericanRepublic 1 year ago 8
@FreeAmericanRepublic as a chef in a british pub i've got to say you're spot on.in the smaller towns theres still alot of politeness/respect but in more urban places like mine its shocking the lack of it.sometimes the odd genuine thankyou makes an otherwise hateful job quite bearable.
chowthe1st 1 year ago
@FreeAmericanRepublic You sound like a nice person. When I was a waitress I was never treated badly but some of my colleagues were and it was awful to watch. My mum brought me up to be incredibly polite and I am so pleased she did. It's nice to be nice to other people. People, whoever they are, deserve to be treated with respect. Treat others how you would like to be treated yourself...
Rachiejane1 1 year ago
Being rude to waiters, dancers, porters, etc. is unacceptable. I would walk out too.
However I do see his point about how being overly polite, while charming at first, can become quite grating quite quickly. Which isn't to say that it is okay, as he said, to bully people.
LGD3 1 year ago 2
Stephen lost a lot of weight since this interview was taken
CaptainOvious123 1 year ago 6
There is nothing wrong with being polite. There is no reason to apologize for having good manners.
Melkesidek 1 year ago 5
If you say 'Fuck You' as you're turning away from someone they hear it as 'Thank You' and respond as such. This also works on small children, police officers and the elderly.
jacksawild 1 year ago 4
@jacksawild Haha! Have you done that in the past?
Rachiejane1 1 year ago
nothing wring with extending kindness, the world could benefit from more of it...i had a similar experience with a family member - they were being so rude the the waiter, all they could do about past injustices done to them by others. the waiter was much stronger than i was...when i later apologized 'on the other person's behalf' he just laughed and said not to worry about it....i admired him for knowing that such things do not inform his sense of self. a lesson i took to heart.
11moonelf 1 year ago
There is nothing wrong with politeness, but like anything else, it can be taken too far.
Personally, I feel that a hearty, "Go fuck yourself." followed by "very much" works in nearly all situations.
Or if you like, you can substitute "very much." with "a-go-go." Either way.
abnormalmatt 1 year ago
It's hard to shrug off politeness, Growing up trying to please your parents, It becomes habitual even when it isn't necessary. What is worse are people who are painfully inoffensive, those people piss me off.
atombat 1 year ago
Nothing wrong with presenting as a thoroughly decent guy. Some say that niceness is the way that weak people pay into the party when they lack the guts to be tough or the class to be brilliant. Stephen Fry at least disproves the latter.
steveh777ify 1 year ago 3
There is no such a thing as too polite. The world would be better place if EVERYBODY was more polite.
By the way, if you are an arrogant and rude rich guy and you are often rude to people who serves you be sure, be very sure that you have already eaten a lot of gross things from your food without knowing. It is a certainty, if you are being rude to waiters they are spitting on your plate, mixing your orange juice with the extra sugar you demanded it with their cocks etc. I've often seen it...
tommytalks77 1 year ago 8
I used to be a waiter and its a big mistake to be rude to them,they could do something foul to your food.I wouldn't but some would.Being rude is ignorant and shows your a tit.
BenPN1000 1 year ago 7
I can almost see what he means from being very polite myself. But to be honest, I'd rather be polite than rude anyday.
123Shazzam123 2 years ago 7
God, he's lost so much weight lately!
WineApprentice 2 years ago
It pains me to say so, but I can't exactly bring myself to chime in with Stephen on this one... if there's one sure indicator of 'bourgeois' behaviour, it's being rude to waiters...
TeodorMe 2 years ago 4
It could be he is a people pleaser because he wants to avoid anty confrontation.I imagine if you suffer from depression you may see yourself as weak.
MONTARE9 2 years ago
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It is not a crime to be polite to people. Just because others may behave beastly doesn't make the considerate one peculiar -- rare, maybe.
I think Fry's angst about his politeness is connected to his homosexuality. The gay boys are the good boys: they say "please" and "thank you." Their instincts are to be accomodating to others, a trait often interpreted as weakness.
Fry is really complaining about being perceived as being gay, Why can't I be as rude as the straight boys? Your nature.
DCFunBud 2 years ago
I agree with you, despite your 3 thumbs down from others.
ExtremeBogom 1 year ago
At this writing, it's 4 thumbs down. I wonder how many thumbs Stephen Fry has?
DCFunBud 1 year ago
The assertion that politeness and homosexuality are connected is stupid.
0rangePete 1 year ago 45
@0rangePete Yeh ridiculous.
KhazModan 6 months ago
this man is the greatest living person right up there with Stephen Hawking
Greig1424 2 years ago 5
Stephen Fry is a throwback from a more gentlemanly, formal, better spoken era. This is a man we should all aspire to be more like.
sfmike20 2 years ago 11
I don't get how people think being polite is insincere. When I say please, thank you, and you're welcome I mean it. If they take it in the wrong way, then I can't do anything about it lol. That's funny I don't think I've encountered overpolitness, but I have seen and heard sarcastic politeness, that's easy to spot.
Anyways, to the haterzzz Stephen always touches his nose, it's a habit. If you're going to critisise about the smallest things, you're really pathetic.
spazzing 2 years ago 17
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MI ÌDOLO ME TUMBÈ CON DE PROFUNDIS SU CARTA A DOUGLAS BOSIE...UN GRAN REFERENTE MI AMOR PLATÒNICO DESDE NIÑA QUE LEÌ EL PRÌNCIPE FELIZ...SI HUBIERAS VIVIDO EN ESTA ÈPOCA O YO EN LA TUYA NO IBAS A LA CÀRCEL NUNCA YO LO IMPEDÌA... MI NOVELA DIOS ES GAY GOD IS GAY QUE APOYÒ A OBAMA LA PUSE EN SU WEBB PARA QUE LA LEAN GRATIS Y VOTEN POR OBAMA LA DEDICO A OSCAR WILDE ... ROCK HUDSON -STEPHEN FRI Y LOS GAYS DEL MUNDO...el amor no tiene sexo...gaviota
escritoragaviota 2 years ago
I adore this Man. Not only is he Highly Intellectual, Funny, Kind, he also has this amazing ability to reach out and endear himself to people of all Social Classes. A True Gentleman.
rockchick80s 2 years ago 69
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don't talk about how reaching out to different classes is hard....everyone is a human.....fuck you bitchass shithead .... if i saw you laying on the street in pain I would simply ignore you. Dick.
AMAZING ABILITY TO REACH OUT TO ALL SOCIAL CLASSES . HA. GO TO HELL YOU DIRTY LITTLE BENDER.
prankstarforlife 2 years ago
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cezar96 9 months ago
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@rockchick80s Yes indeed. By using a wide vocabulary would cleverly make anyone seem intelligent. It is a quite simple way of getting thumbs up. Shall I get some approving thumbs up as well?
cezar96 9 months ago
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why is he touching his nose so much? does he have a coke problem?
mattrmc19 2 years ago
He had. Not any longer.
ImeldaLumos 2 years ago
What a man Fry is. He isn't some righteous bigot who thinks that politeness is a necessity as I actually would have expected. He recognises that it is important to have all types of people except those that cause serious harm.
curzmg 2 years ago 169
I've always found people's treatment of waitstaff to be a very accurate measure of what they're actually like, rather than the face they're trying to present. The fellow he was eating with sounds like a prick.
yayforspooky 2 years ago 8
I agree. In other words, the way one treats one's social inferiors is a gauge of their character.
written12 2 years ago 5
well said!
WritingJenny73070 2 years ago
I tend to think that referring to waitstaff as one's "social inferiors" is also a pretty strong clue.
jimmylefutte 2 years ago 4
social inferiors? no such thing, thumbs down to that. i object to the word inferior.
bluggh 1 year ago
@bluggh
I mean it in the traditionally understood sense of the word- to refer to people whose work or economic status is lower than yours. Certainly, Fry and his television and film friends occupy a higher socio-economic rung than a waiter. Of course, that doesn't put them on a higher moral rung.
We all know how the expression "my
We both agree, I'm sure, that being obnoxious or failing to thank people for what they do for you is appalling.
written12 1 year ago
LOL, he reckons his politeness is "unattractive".
I reckon its, really attractive
He's so hot (when he was youngeer)
LOVE HIM!
JennylovesMJ 2 years ago 10
The bloke he was having dinner with sounds like a cock!
In my experience people who are rude to others are usually sycophantic arse-lickers as well.
graceygrumble 2 years ago 8
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He's lying, watch him touch his nose few times
nadamsedaovoradi 2 years ago
I'm touching my nose right now.
superfunbad 2 years ago 7
Liar. How do we know?.... wait that's a paradox.
stperkin 2 years ago
That rude to waiters thing pisses me off. It's so unnecessary.
SomeIrishGuy19 2 years ago 5
Stephen Fry is such an egreeably nice chap!
psuedosurfer 2 years ago 8
He isn't saying it's wrong to be polite, he's saying is wrong to be 'over'-polite. The very definition of 'over' in that context is, 'too much'.
I think he's right. I tend to be over-polite myself, and then people will doubt your saying, opinion etc.
Although, I think that we've somehow lost the definition of 'politeness', it's not about continually repeating words like "Thanks". It's being considerate and acknowledge, to make people comfortable and happy. That isn't horrible at all.
ImeldaLumos 2 years ago 11
well put
adamlyons87 2 years ago
He is a lovely intelligent n modest man
ffscantfindausername 2 years ago 17
I agree he is a bit over polite but that is still better then rude or cruel. Just something about rude and cruel people that makes me want to chop them up and feed them to dogs.
A controllable impulse in these 'civilized' times. Such an action may teach a few manners toward strangers, for you can never truly know what is in a strangers head or how capable they are of being just as ugly in a more violent way.
Too bad most people think they are safe enough to be rude and cruel; they aren't.
vikingkeith 2 years ago 10
seriously lame comment
DrakeWeAreLEAVING 2 years ago
Why is he apologizing for simple manners?
It's OK to be rude now? I guess I won't be vacationing in Britian!
PatchworkDream 2 years ago
He isnt,he is saying that being overly polite is grating and insincere.
DrakeWeAreLEAVING 2 years ago 2
Maybe, but, at least here in the US, the overwhelming sense of entitlement that people carry with them makes them downright narcissistic and rude. It seems to me that people are losing their ability to be polite because they think it's insincere, but the reality is, it's about recognizing there is someone else in the world besides you. I wish more people were polite. I wish more people thought about others before they let themselves behave however they want.
Maggie028 2 years ago 151
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no 1 gives a flying fuck abou. its just a video chill
efagels 2 years ago
@Maggie028 intent vs action though. the issue is, in many of these people, it is insincere
Konstiin 1 year ago
why would you wanna come here its boring and cold and sarcastic (although i do like the sarcasm)
efagels 2 years ago
Wonder whether he treats his OCD like symptoms?
tarboos1 2 years ago
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poor poor stephen - his chin is disappearing
HMservant 2 years ago
this is old,hes much slimmer now,why do you care what someone else looks like?
DrakeWeAreLEAVING 2 years ago 4
Oh I don't I just said it as it is my sarcastic way (all I do is talk sarcastically) I can't help it!
HMservant 2 years ago
Stephen Fry is a treasure.
bitterballoffrogs 2 years ago 13
Hmm... I know what he means, I feel the same way, I cannot stand impoliteness.
StadialProductions 2 years ago 8
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speak american please
jeedizzle 2 years ago
shut up u douchebag
alexkevans 2 years ago
must have took a weekend...
CrazyMissAnne 2 years ago
the nose is just sensational!
CrazyMissAnne 2 years ago 3
I love him.
bananya122cliff 2 years ago 4
stephen fry is my hero. whenever i feel sad i put on *index finger wiggle* "A Bit Of Fry And Laurie". ohh my classic little comedy man!
saggigirl01 2 years ago 3
he is a great man
romanpr1nce 2 years ago 4
I love Stephen Fry, but I completely agree with him, there is such a thing as too polite. It makes people take you for granted and disrespect you.
Anhelain 2 years ago 2
I really like Stephen Fry. It makes me sad to hear that he thinks the niceties and courtesies of life are weakness. Being considerate and sensitive to the needs of others are qualities that are all too rare. Unfortunately there will always be those who take advantage of a "gentleman" for example, wasssuppp08.
edrice22 2 years ago 2