How To (Not) Demolish a Wall

[Keepcalmandcarryon22]

"oh home renovation you begin so auspiciously." I love these guys.

[zanegriggs]

i watched this video before reading TFiOS, but i enjoy it so much more now because of HULK SMASH.

[AppleDappleJoy]

Not that this video wasn't good, on the contrary it was great (they all are), but I think the main reason I it the like button was because of John's dance at the end.

[Willandacamera]

For some reason, I really enjoy hearing John speak Russian. XD

[chippita13]

your cane dance at the end is a perfect example of why I admire you so

[kittycutebegrim]

lol hulk smash

[MissiCupcake553]

@Antoniodoval94

Whoops! I meant:

@th3soviet

она спрашивала, что вы русский человек сказал. :)

(ona sprashivala, chto vy russkiĭ chelovek skazal.)

[MissiCupcake553]

@Antoniodoval94

она спрашивала, что вы русский человек сказал. :)

(ona sprashivala, chto vy russkiĭ chelovek skazal.)

[alexrawraanatru]

another brick in the wall XD

[TheRedheadChic]

Such a nerd. <3

[getalife768]

2:18 HULKSMASH! TFIOS!

[th3soviet]

lol I'm russian. That was hilarious.

[Antoniodoval94]

@th3soviet what did he say?

[th3soviet]

@Antoniodoval94 What? What? I don't speak english!

[LupusIsABadDiagnosis]

I know 105pounds girls tougher than John.

[LupusIsABadDiagnosis]

@starryhappiness geez, cranky.

[LupusIsABadDiagnosis]

@starryhappiness Oh and fuck you. English is the 4th language I speak. So yeah, it's not perfect, but we'll talk when you speak 4languages.

[zoerickard]

Oh How Frasier and Niles embarrass their dad.

[FullTonProductions]

i probably would've just started smashing the wall with a sledgehammer and accidentally made the house collapse.

[GreaterBookWyrm]

3:18

That's no happy dance I know! Where is John and what have you done with him!?!

[pbjellybeanful]

funniest ways to (not) tear down a wall. BTW your puff has a very lovely shape today.

[NerdsForTheWin72]

Step 6 made me pee a little. Also the dance.

[buckeyeboi42]

its more a fail in understanding the basic principles of levers than anything really.

[briannapast]

nice crowbar dance



[The24thDane]

First thing I want to do when I see a crowbar is play Half-Life :P

[AnnaBanan2012]

I'm not sure which is more of a fail..that he couldn't demolish a wall or that he re-enacted every step, knowing he could possibly shock himself..

[torishannan]

smash with the other side of the crowbar it does more damage

[EpicSuccuss]

dude you gota use the other side of the crobar too

[Ironor8]

Very nice Russian imitation!

[djpj22]

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you John Green. Award Winning Author..........

"the first thing I tried (when wanting to demolish a wall) was the octopus" =P

[missliddiep]

Even myself, when I was 10, was able to destroy a brick wall with a mallet and hammer.

You should've used a mallet.

or called 10-year-old rage engulphed me. :)

[starlove0043]

for some reason he looks really attractive.. XD DFTBA

[BrutticusForce]

i think you were on the right track when you where hitting the wall



[FOBaholic125]

I want to come over and tear down that wall. I enjoy creating havoc upon things.

[sandstorm49]

It's funny how gorbachaev does indeed speak english. Good try though

[Nebuli2]

0:57

The plural of octopus isn't octopi, it's octopodes :P

[TysonsLC]

@Nebuli2 ikr, people just assumed it was because the plural of cactus is cacti

[Nebuli2]

@TysonsLC It's a shame that we even spell it like octopus instead of octopous. (The same goes for platypus)

[tomek123kotek]

Oh look, its Gordon Freeman's brother, John Freeman!

[MrsMickeyLover]

"RAAAAAAAAAA HULK SMASH!!!!"

[Unknownboi88]

I wouldn't think a prybar wouldn't need an instruction manual its a leaver (like one of the oldest mechanisms in the world next to the wheel)

[alexandreleverrier]

That contractor was pretty cool.

[bartman1915]

its actually octopuses not octopusi

[krappycone]

@bartman1915 octopi actually.

[TortoiseWrath]

@krappycone I believe that would be "octopodes."

[purplebob101010]

that sounds like something i would do (especially the octopus thing...)

[lordmahan11]

I've actually done professional demo work ...the trick with walls is they like falling off in large sheets--if you can. The joy of pulling a massive slab of sheet-rock is--truly--the only work related joy for a professional demolition man. Also, a hammer is what you were missing. At this point I suppose this knowledge is more useful for the stray youtuber, but with a hammer, crowbar, ladder, and plastic garbage can, you can gut an entire middle-size house in under 72 hours.

[landmd]

@lordmahan11 I kinda wish I had a random mid-size house just to test the under 72 hours theory. I've done rooms in a day but never a full house.

[lordmahan11]

@landmd

Yeah, once you get the hang of it, you can get the sheets to practically fall off by themselves! It took me about 20-30 hours of on-the-job practice before I could do that though. The time you really save is clean up--moving a roomful of dust-ridden debris is considerably more time consuming than hauling a neatly stacked pile! =)

[thegirlfromUNCLE]

This may have been the first vlogbrothers video I saw... ah, memories.

[fluroza]

Ahh, this was uploaded on my birthday :)

[FrySmoothy]

You are implying that Gordon Freeman is a criminal.

[AlexNuchiha]

Sledgehammer and a poster of a penny. Yep. 

[itallrhymeswithrae]

An old friend of mine once got me to fling myself at random walls to figure out if I'm an octopus. Several years, some serious bruising, and entirely too much laughter later, I finally know where she got that (not entirely half bad) idea from. XD Also, just in case you were wondering...Nope. I'm still not an octopus. (Just checked.)

[jonservo]

somebody has a liberal arts degree

[jkdwayne]

WTF!!! figures your from indiana.

[BloodxOfxBlack]

Who the hell is Hank?

[moneyyea96]

@BloodxOfxBlack

Hank is his brother... He makes the other vlogbrothers videos... He is funny too

[cynthiayl12]

@BloodxOfxBlack An incandescent mass of gas. Duh.

[freaksfromafar]

Best dance ever!

[samplingrate]

How are there Half-Life references in this video?

...or, is the crowbar enough of a reference in and of itself?

[Basslinerocks18]

Was that Entrance of the Gladiators or Thunder and Blazes at the end, there?

[marchergirl3]

Out of all the vlogbrothers videos over the years, for some reason this is one of my favorites.

[13Yeared]

Nerdy guy with a crowbar... Gordon Freeman?

[Magstarcutie]

You do realise that by making holes in the wall using the crowbar, you can now pull off the outer wall, correct?

Nerdfighterlike you, John. DFTBA

[Tcr810XP]

410 people are walls. and for future reference, first start by not being near electrical cables, second take a nice solid swing at the wall, third put the little bendy bit of the crowbar into the hole that was made by your crowbar swing, fourth, pull like hell, repeat an necessary until wall is gone.

Protip, nothing prepares you for using a crowbar like growing a goatee. Also I believe MIT offers a class on crowbar use... although it's mostly specializing in hitting aliens or evil soldiers DFTBA

[yourworstnightmar231]

what general gorvechev's phone number?

[ddc32997]

Cane dnce at the end was my favourite :)

[AsbjornOlling]

Hank Freeman?

[jessicalilac]

i had to watch this again.

[pandamana1234]

he sounds funny when he says octopus.

[3DISEASE]

I didn't know you guys live in Indiana too, it makes me happy knowing I live so close to you.

[steampunkfangirl]

your russian is fantastic :)

[sessrojak]

the list of things that John is not

1) an octopus

2) good at demolishing wall

3) gordon freeman

[mikeloaf]

my first instinct upon picking up a crowbar is to regrow my goatee and stop talking.

[epsbandy]

xD yeah that's also my first reaction if I get anything in my hands that has the right length to use it as a walking stick (but my music is more like singing in the rain) ^^

[Reader4077]

Its called a sledgehammer :)



[EmmaOnATangent]

Two years later, and that song and dance act at the end????? Wow. AWEEEEEEESOMEEEEEEE. John, you're good for the soul.

[mrloulou97]

SOMEBODY, PLEASE, TURN THOSE LAST 5-10 SECONDS INTO A GIF. I AM BEGGING YOU.

[oh9ah6]

@mrloulou97 I'm on it.

[kuutonii]

Crowbar dancing ftw

[Clemmyna]

xD

[YoshiLebrax]

So much loling at the dance at the end. SO MUCH STOMACH HURT.

[SirIntegra42]

It's so odd hearing the word bonkers in an American accent, in a good way of course :D. There should be more use of British slang everywhere.

[IAmKingoftheSockHop]

@SirIntegra42 I'm American. I say 'bonkers' and 'bloody hell' and stuff like that all the time. British slang just sounds cooler to me XD

[veryspecialist]

@SirIntegra42 Yes, yes there should. Because British slang is simply spiffing :)

[KrustyFrank27]

Also, did anyone else notice that John split the infinitive in the video title?

[aang94479]

I'm surprised how long it took for John to go all Gordon Freeman-ny on the wall.

[aModernDandy]

407 walls dislike this video!

[CheyenneJoy]

it's like when they were making these videos the years ago, they were like, "In the future, teenagers will want to make hilarious GIFs of us" and they would do the most random things possible, i.e., dancing with a crowbar.

[thestrangemango]

Ugh, that intro! The memories!

[4LiveLifeWithLove4]

Maybe... if he put the tip of the crowbar into the holes and pulled.... it might work better.

[PrettyGreenGoat]

John Green's Russian is the worst ever....I still love him though :)

[Irishtayto]

im going over all the older vlogs and i think my favourite ones are in 2009 - 2010 they are hilarious!!!! but this is one of my favourites ever!

[deathbyjellybabies]

i have an urge to find out if i'm an octopus...

[steponme208]

I feel like when he's saying he 'did the octopus' he literally means "I started by actually trying to punch the walls"

[chillermillercream]

i love this video

[brianawesome100]

this is how i do it

Step 1: Get some small dynamite and put it all over the wall

Step 2: Wire all the dynamite together

Step 3: Blow the MOTHAFUCHA UPPPP!!!!

[bindobud]

In which John is not an octopus, yells at himself in Russian, and tap dances with a crowbar.

[funnypets456]

1:07-1:08 Crotch shot.

[jijbentgoed]

@Lerax429 i'm learning russian what does shto mean?

[thehistoryboy]

@jijbentgoed I'm no expert, but a quick Google Translate search suggests that что translates into English as 'what?' (ie. the interrogative).

[jijbentgoed]

@thehistoryboy zanks!!! :-)

[LLTheater]

When I first watched this video, I assumed the octopus thing happened when he was a little kid.

But, no, it was during this project.

[whichonespink357]

At 1:21 all I could hear was Pink Floyd.

[fivelittlenerds]

Leverage John, it's not hard. I'm a nerdy teenage girl, and I'm pretty sure /I/ could do it.

[GONEmypurpleflapjack]

i had to play that music before. DAMN YOU CHROMATIC SCALES!

[ReKrisB]

Man, I love your crow bar dance XD

[lemonice2700]

... Still not an octopus XD XD XD Lmao

[burningflurber]

I can not take down a wall in one step. PROCRASTINATE! :D

[ArtemisJami3]

Call Gordon Freeman instead, ask him how to use a crowbar.

[AnyaEmber13]

this is my favorite vlog brother video yet...

[atrociousCreations]

I think if you ever become a career criminal, you should do the dance every time you extort someone. :D

[Nerdfighterian]

10 points to John for avoiding the obvious in how to not tear down a wall

(also known as not making an effort to do so)

[emilycaroline9]

I like how John busted out the Russian. :)

[inkyspyglass]

Crowbar dance FTW :)

[miceylulu]

Way to split the infinitive in the title, John.

[sethboy66]

@miceylulu he wasn't splitting an infinitive he was actually going around splitting it by putting not after how to

[miceylulu]

@sethboy66 Do you know what an infinitive is? It's the combination of "to" and a verb. By putting not between to and the verb, that splits the infinitive. How to is not an infinitive. The proper way would be to put How Not to Demolish a Wall.

[sethboy66]

@miceylulu oh i thought you were talking about how to (not) my bad

[DinoTubz9638]

@cocoasteam Both are correct like fish v. fishes.

[icecreamsoda117]

oh john, that split infinitive in the title...at least you said it correctly in the video?

[gonzalitos15]

what if he does stick to the wall? what happens next? XD

[WasinTungsten]

Split infinitive in the title? Really?

[ZiBlueProtractor]

I am a 14 year old girl, but I still know how to use a crowbar. :/

[ejdines]

New happy dance? I THINK SO!

[88FingersEddward]

*Note to self and everybody reading this*

Never watch this video while rinsing your mouth with ACT Total Care Anticavity Fluoride Mouthwash.

Because when John starts talking about electrical wiring being in the spots where he willy-nilly throws his crowbar, you WILL spit that ACT Total Care Anticavity Fluoride Mouthwash all over the sink and a little bit on the floor.

And then you will have to clean it up. Which is fun for no one.

[stardust62495]

@88FingersEddward

i almost choked on a samosa when he said that lol.

[xtiredxemox]

rubber mallets will be your friend when demolishing walls

also, i happen to know a guy who had to tear apart a closet in his girlfriend's house while he was stoned. apparently it was very confusing.

[blackmidnight92]

Use a giant hammer?

[Allieissoawesomelike]

If the unicorns attack at least you have a crowbar.........

[AnyaEmber13]

i love you guys so much....

[45stillalive]

yea...so...i gotta brag. i demolished several walls in my tv room/bathroom/garage (all in one day) when i was 17. and i just find it outstandingly comical that a grown man couldnt do it.

oh by the way, i am a 5'3'' blond Caucasian girl.

[deathowlhunter]

i love how he checked for wiring.. AFTER putting holes in it xD

[golddemona]

Well, now that you have a crowbar, at least you'll be ready for the inevitable headcrab invasion. P:

[AngeliaMeagania673]

hÊy_áÑý_gûys_wAñt_tö_chàt_wìth­_mÉ

[coramonster]

@AngeliaMeagania673 no

[Drummerofthought]

Sometimes, and im just saying...sometimes a hammer works better than a crowbar!!!

[leSoleilestamoi]

i think taking a nap should be step 6.

[spidermanandsnape]

I demolish walls a lot, but I use a hammer and use all my anger to SMASH THE WALL!

[Sebastianin2010]

Oh look, you're Gordan Freeman with that crowbar :) just need a HEV suit...

[phycoboys4]

The walls of my school wobble when you lean against them , so every kid is glad to make it out alive at the end of the day !

[Sloppyjoemess]

I like how people are still giving him advice although it's a year and a half later.

[Windspirit21]

try using you head a a batterin ram. i promise you will destroy the wall without getting a concussion. trust me, im a doctor

[ArcHeavyGunner111097]

OMG he's Gordon Freeman!!!!!

[yamercado2]

Because of this video, every so often I will throw myself against a wall, just to check if I am an octopus.

[Willandacamera]

You split the infinitive in the title. Just saying.

[CurrentlyM]

You remind me of Eric Forman from "That 70's Show"

[foreverwithoutyou]

I fail at demolishing falls, do not feel so bad. But I can brake a heavy duty padlock and chain using only pliers, a hammer, my hands, a peice of rope, and a rock :D And in case it is questioned as to why i was doign this, I got bored 0.0

[TheItouchmaniac]

I would use a hammer or a metal baseball bat. DFTBA

[cocoasteam]

The plural of octopus is OCTOPUSES! Not OCTOPI!!!!! Look it up in the Oxford Dictionary of English!

[GeorgeBennett92]

@cocoasteam both are acceptable.

[fearthegeeklord]

@GeorgeBennett92 nope. Octopuses or octopodes.

[obeygiant13]

can I still be a nerdfighter if im able to successfully demolish a wall?

[g2theIrishPianist]

@obeygiant13 I don't see why not ^^

[McWillie111]

Never good to run into things with glasses on. bad memories.

[DimityGirl]

Octopodes

FTFY

[Moggiepillar]

Um. . . John, you split an infinitive. The video title should be, "How (not) to Demolish a Wall."

[ShadowChimera1390]

3:07 - 3:24 Awesome.

[jellybeangravy]

And at 3:20, we see John at the start of his "embarrassing father" section of hi life ;)

[itstotallysarahyo]

@streetcakePC I believe you mean pretty well. Just sayin'.

[AbsentMindedInc]

Your Russian is actually pretty good, John :D Nice job!

[jedisushi72]

The title of this video is a split infinitive!

And we all know from your Catcher In The Rye vids that you're better than that!

It should be How (Not) To Demolish A Wall.

Although, I may be wrong, you're the writer. ;)

[streetcakePC]

Step five worked pretty good. Kinda.

[ultimatenerd22]

are you wearing bowling shoes in this video?

[blacksnowhitequeen]

@ultimatenerd22 Are you wearing PANTS in this video? That's my question. lol

[ultimatenerd22]

@blacksnowhitequeen well, i'm not in this video, but every time i have seen i've worn pants

[blacksnowhitequeen]

@ultimatenerd22 Umm that was a comment to John. But good to know >.> hehe

[ultimatenerd22]

@blacksnowhitequeen why did you reply to me then?

[blacksnowhitequeen]

@ultimatenerd22 Because it was in reference to your comment. You ask if he was wearing bowling shoes, I am farther taken away at his wearing pants.

[TheScreamingReviewer]

that looks so much fun!!!

[soccerlove95]

*bodywall*

[FreeVlogger]

ZOMFG!!!!!! YOU SPEAK RUSSIAN!!!

[indigoplaya23]

Awesome leap into the air! Perfect shot! Bitchassness!

[AyJay1060]

put the crow bar in the hole?