My Story of domestic violence

[TheHappilyInsane]

Sorry I only see one side of the story. Your side.

No one can base a hole story on one side. You took the time to make this video but you didn't take the time to get to know the people that beat the crap out of you. And yes you can find things about people before you get over your head.

Be smart. That's all.

[spaceysno1girl]

Its hard to get out, but the feeling when you do get out is amazing, i remember my first night without him in the house, i got up the next morning after an uneventful night and smiled for the first time in forever. Getting out is the hardest part, its all uphill from there, sometimes it feels like its not but it is xx

[nanditeplus]

"i had pushed everyone that loved me away. i felt like nobody understood." thanks for saying that. i always feel like i can't relate to other's dv because they always say that the man isolates you. i feel like I was the one who pushed people away, even though it's because of the way he treats me. just hearing you say that made me realize that i've just been using the minor differences in our stories to make it seem like what's going on isn't so bad or to blame myself.

[YAOMINGOWNS]

Hey, do not let what these assholes are saying get to you. They are losers and are most likely abusers themselves or will turn out to be abusers. Glad you're safe now, wish you the best of luck! None of it's your fault.

[britt8866]

@dlanders07 and jpeete i know you guys must be trolling because you sound like idiots and no matter what anyone says, female or male, none of them deserve to be hurt physically or otherwise. You two must be lonely boys that no one wants to be with that rude and uncaring. The bruises often look worse after 3-5 days post beating and so i am guessing you two are uneducated hicks who sit on youtube all day trolling peoples serious videos. get a life or you will be worthless forever

[britt8866]

@dlanders07 and jpeete i know you guys must be trolling because you sound like idiots and no matter what anyone says, female or male, none of them deserve to be hurt physically or otherwise. You two must be lonely boys that no one wants to be with that rude and uncaring. The bruises often look worse after 3-5 days post beating and so i am guessing you two are uneducated hicks who sit on youtube all day trolling peoples serious videos. get a life or you will be worthless forever

[SexyFireBabe14]

Im right behind you hun i was beat for a year and a half strangled beat pushed shoved, and had my house destroyed every time after a fight. Until you live the life of an abused women dont say anything because you dont know. We all know what to look for in abusive relationships but they tare you down make you depend on them and tare you away from EVERYONE where you have noone to turn to. I hope you find someone that treats you like a queen youll learn how to smile again trust me i did!

[ImTheBabyDoll]

THAT SMILE IS THERE LOVE.BURIED DEEP DEEP INSIDE OF YOU.YOU WILL ONE DAY FIND IT AGAIN.YOUR ON THE ROAD TO FINDING IT JUST BY DOING THIS VIDEO.LIFE GETS BETTER AFTER WE GET THREW THE PAINE AND ANGER.WE DID NOT DESERVE ANY OF THIS CRAP .THEY DID NOT DESERVE US.GOD BLESS YOU

[wormg501]

How do you get some one that is being abused to leave .. I have a friend that is being abused that comes and stays at my house after he beats her up and then he calls crying beggin her to come back ... and she does.. what can I do ?

[vg524]

I could never physically abuse a woman i love . i jus walked away and that made things worst . she left me . i jus dont understand why she did not hear me out why i walked away .

[jpeete]

You ever thought about dating white guys? Those guys were pretty black and they will slap a bitch!

[cowgal6946]

@jpeete Everyone in this video is white actually, so maybe you need to actually watch it before you speak on it. Thanks! =]

[jpeete]

@cowgal6946 That guy's face was totally black. I think you are racist in not admitting you like dark chocolate.

[dlanders07]

Lets play devils advocate here.....you are the common denominator in all of these beatings. To say that you had nothing to do with it is irresponsible. Maybe you should try keeping your famous trap shut.

[cowgal6946]

@dlanders07 Maybe you should have a slight clue as to what you speak about before you decide to look like an idiot speaking on behalf of something you don't know about.You don't like it? don't watch it! Simple. Figure it out. =]

[dlanders07]

@cowgal6946 Well, with an attitude like that i expect more videos to come. Really it sounds like you a bragging about getting your ass whipped. Truthfullly...they guy must have been a pussy....i practically had to pause the video to see some of the love taps that left marks. FYI--pick up a good mouth piece or a muzzle.

[jpeete]

@cowgal6946 I think dlanders has a point. you might want to keep your mouth shut....because your famous smile becomes states evidence when its missing teeth.

[cowgal6946]

@jpeete I have beautiful teeth and I will speak about this til the day I die, if you don't like it, DON'T WATCH IT!

[lilvin69]

@cowgal6946 you suck 

[thekenniewitch]

Please check out the website KFACC as they have a part called, "Survivors speak, testimonials. There is a part called "growing up, conditioning" which explains why females are set up from childhood to accept violence.

[genaroxs]

I love your video to the fullest your a strong wmn for doing it. I just got out a rel. that alost lasted 2 years just living life to the fullest everday for me and my 9 mnth old daughter. Keep your head up

[SouthPhillyHooligan]

@UserNamei5 No the point does not still stand as your credibility no longer stands because you lied. First of all, if you did any time at all, it was not in a Federal prison, because you did not commit a Federal crime. Second, no one is going to confuse/forget their own prison sentence was only 4 months, not 4 years.

[SouthPhillyHooligan]

@UserNamei5 Still not a Federal crime, unless maybe your dad was a Postal worker and you went into the Post Office to beat the shit out of him or something like that. Still likely the Feds would decline to prosecute and would let the state do it. Feds will typically only pick up drug, terrorism and organized crime cases in their jurisdiction, and not even all of those. If you want me to believe you did 4 years in a Federal pen for beating up your dad, you must think I was born yesterday.

[SouthPhillyHooligan]

@UserNamei5 4 years in the Fed for assaulting someone? What? Did you drop him off across state lines with 20 keys of blow in the trunk of your car or something? How the fuck was beating up your dad a Federal crime?

[SouthPhillyHooligan]

@UserNamei5 Tough love my ass. It's called anonymously being an asshole to people on YT because you can be without consequence. Don't try to pretend you're doing something nice for this girl. How do you know this girl asked to be in this situation, much less all abused women, as you are implying? Bottom line, she got beat up when she was a teenager and you want to blame HER for it. Perhaps she made some mistakes, but how do you know what those mistakes are or that she hasn't learned from them?

[SouthPhillyHooligan]

@UserNamei5 1. She was a teenager when she got into these relationships, cut the kid some slack, 2. What is with all the hardass motherfuckers comin on here getting all sanctimonious about mistakes made by a teenage girl who was physically abused, basically saying she shoulda known better? What the FUCK is your problem? Why don't you go kick puppies in the fuckin face or somethin? Geez. 3. My dad was in and out of prison and a fuckin scumbag and my ma would still kick your sorry ass

[BlooditeDrakan]

Stay strong hun. I had to watch it when I was a kid. Guys who do that will have it coming to them. Disgraceful behaviour. Good luck.

[mdtrtwlt]

LosAngelesWriter has a truly warped judgment.

cowgal6946 Kudos to you for making and posting this vid.

[LosAngelesWriter]

@mdtrtwlt

Warped judgement?  I advocate women CHOOSE not to date abusive men, please tell us all how that is "warped." Women are not forced into dating abusive men in the United States, they have numerous protections under the law.

[charreva]

Yes, abuse builds up. They change- for the worse. We have a whole load of reasons why we can't leave. It really doesn't help that we lose our property rights if we leave too.

[jwcurl1983]

People need to understand that this kind of relationship is not easy! my mom and dad were married for 13 years he did things that the movies dont show. my mom lost 2 children to him people want to blame the women TELL ME THIS WHY DO DHS, POLICE OFFICERS, 911, AND HOSPITALS NEVER HELPED! My mom tryed for years to get away and we were all dragged back with gun held to my moms head why did she keep haven children she was raped BUT COPS SAID IT WASNT RAPE SHE WAS MARRIED! I am proud of my mom!!!!!!!

[katiesteele7982]

Why are women blamed for being abuse, and abusers are not questioned for their actions?

[katiesteele7982]

In our society it is a constant message that women must be strong enough to not GET INTO abusive relationships. how about changing that message to say that men (usually) should aim to not be abusive toward their partners as (90% of the time) they are inflicting abuse?

[katiesteele7982]

STOP BLAMING THE VICTIM

The abuser is the person that needs to make change

[katiesteele7982]

For anyone who believes this is the victims fault please

Instead of asking - why does she stay/or never leave, put her children through it or is so weak that she cannot leave?

Ask instead -

Why does he think he has the right to hit another person?

Make her scared for her and her children's lives?

[LosAngelesWriter]

You asked how does this happen twice in your video.

It's pretty obvious, you chose to date guys who beat up women, guys who are thugs, creeps and should be in prison. Let's hope you pressed charges.

Try dating guys who actually treat women well and have high moral character.

If you can't find those guys, then don't date at all.

[cowgal6946]

I understand its hard for others to know unless you've been in the situation...

I was very young, and simply didn't understand the cycle. In my situation I saw my father treating my mother this way, which plays a huge part in most DV cases. I was attracting that type, and was drawn to that type.

I stopped the cycle over 2 years ago.I have an amazing boyfriend. I am still in court vs. my second ex to this day. The first ex has warrants for his arrest.

[LosAngelesWriter]

Even if you're attracted to the type (evil men), you still have a free will to not act on that attraction.

I'm sorry I have a problem with people who knowingly place themselves in dangerous situations, against the advice of others, and then when they get out, feel they need to to give us a soapbox lecture.

Many other women come from the same background as you do and choose not to date this types of criminals.

[slapplejuice]

I doubt guys walked up to her telling her that they would eventually beat her with a bat.

[xunknownangelx]

Honestly do you really think she knew they were capable of these sorts of things when she got into these relationships or met them, let me tell you know, it can take a few weeks, days, or even years before abuse starts in a relationship. Don't presume things you obviously don't have a clue about.

[SouthPhillyHooligan]

@LosAngelesWriter You're a fuckin dick, man. How did this happen twice? There are a lot of scumbags out there, that's how. More importantly, there are a lot of spineless, stupid and callous people out there who refuse to do anything about it. Your callousness is part of the problem. Did she make some bad choices? I dunno for sure, but it seems likely. It also seems like she knows the mistakes she made so your dickhead response was unnecessary.

[txbluebonnet]

@LosAngelesWriter Whoa! I can't believe a Los Angeles writer would write such a comment on a heartfelt story. I'm an advocate at the National Domestic Violence Hotline and a survivor too twice over.

I see the comment you left is over a year old, I'm hoping that your eyes have been opened by now with the true dynamics of domestic violence.

I challenge you to come on my show on BlogTalkRadio called Beyond Words Live! and let's talk.

[liyish]

you are not alone.. it takes real courage to come out and tell your story.. trust in yourself love yourself deeply.. the future will be bright.

[4398814]

i saw my mom and my stepfathers hurt eath other and me i lift when i was 15 years old and has not seen anyone i would say to anyone just make it out of anything ALIVE i did

[LEMOY121]

NEW PROMO MUSIC VIDEO ABOUT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE....if you allow him...check it out

[balance512]

Before I say this, I will say that my best friend has been in 2 abusive relationships I helped her leave, she is well now. I have volunteered at women's shelters, and found myself in a marriage with 2 kids that began to be abusive, I got out after the first slap. The man who abuses has a problem, but the woman who takes it does also. She documented the abuse, but didn't have enough self respect to leave? BEING A VICTIM IS SO MUCH EASIER THAN BEING STRONG.

[Censual81]

I work with DV victims on a daily basis. I also interned at an inpatient mental health facility before working with this population. I understand the correlation. After 3 yrs of seeing so many ppl in this position, I have come to the conclusion that some ppl don't realize they are being victimized until they are in this position that no one wants to find themselves in. It's a true test of courage and survival. I'm living proof of that.

[iloveporsha18]

iam so glad you got out of this harmful relationship. i recently got out of the same thing in 2008. the BOY who did it is now in jail for attempted murder. he makes calls threatening my life & knows my current bf's address & is now threatening him. i know he will be in jail for a while but im not afraid when he gets out. I gave the situation to God, & He is healing those broken wounds day by day. i just want to say God bless you. You are a strong woman! =]

[adamgontierfan2013]

hihhhhhhh

[babywu48]

you should have shown the 2 ahole's faces maybe they would have been a littile ashamed if that is possible for women beaters ,basically they are cowards, glad you got out Bless you

[icypassionz]

Yeah everyone make their own choices, but that doesn't mean she deserved to get punched, kicked, beaten by a fat, slammed etc. NO ONE deserves to be treated that WAY regardless. I wish you had more empathy.

[adamgontierfan2013]

you are a verry brave and beautiful woman and iwent through alot of things too i was abused i had 7 ribs broken and i had a fractured ankel and had many posetions brokeni was nearly strangled to death and had more black eyes bloody noses and fat lips to count and i was even threatened with a knife numerous times and was threatened that if i left i would die but now i got out and iadmire you for putting this up

[cowgal6946]

And I admire anyone who can make it out alive =] Stay strong! Just fill others in on your situation..it helps!! Its hard but it helps!

[adamgontierfan2013]

thaanx 4 comntin back

im happy we both made it out alive

[tejciqa]

wow i must say i admire u for doing this really!!

i know damn good how hard it is 2 go trough that but my story is dad and victim my mom and me..but same thing..and my mom keeps being with my dad, believes him when he says he's not gonna do it again...really bad choise..i reaaaaaally admire u, u r so brave and strong- i wish all people abused would be like u

wish u better luck in love and be strong ^^ bye

[cowgal6946]

First of all thank you very much! Its been hard, but I'm not the only person to go through this, and I'm not going to allow myself to be the victim anymore! I am so sorry for your situation. I too went through that..I believe that is why I date the idiots I have...You stay strong also.

[MP5KER]

Hello there.."cowgal" I just wanted to say your a brave and beautiful woman. I really hope that you have found inner healing from these terrible acts. No woman deserves that. NOT ONE.EVER. I hope that in your heart you know that not all of us guys are like that. I hope you take good care and find happiness. And when we all pass on, I hope to see you in Heaven. Chin up...walk tall! Your a young and beautiful woman and I wish you all the best!Take good care "cowgal". Rob.

[Geezyone]

god bless you thank goodness you are alright and may it never happen again.

[chocolatepowershovel]

Hope You are doing well Now. You don't need this kind of treatment. When it seems 'Perfect', that's usually a Red Flag. If they tell you 'I Love You' early in the relationship, BACK AWAY!! Take Care of yourself. Hope more people watch this video.

[cwizgird]

Awesome testimonial. Thank you for sharing your story!

[cowgal6946]

Thank you very much.I appreciate it so much.