Virgins, getting caught masturbating and oral sex while driving - Ask Mistress M

[slevin741]

Your cat turns me on!

[RattiestData60]

The Cat Is Sooooo Cute :)

[2009joeyjoejoe]

I got caught masturbating by my neighbor.

[AngryAussie]

@2009joeyjoejoe Lucky you!

[darkchimeraa]

also. FUCK LEGAL AGE!  >:3

[AngryAussie]

@darkchimeraa I'll just be passing your details onto the feds now

[darkchimeraa]

PARENTS CATCH YOU MASTURBATING? LOOK THEM IN THE EYE AND FINISH LIKE A BOSS!

[AngryAussie]

@darkchimeraa You go with that

[CheckDaClaws]

@darkchimeraa hahaha "what about it?!!"



[xMeggyPoohx]

Subtitles would help o-o

[AngryAussie]

@xMeggyPoohx Why is that?

[babel0wnage]

midget donkey porn. FTW

[AngryAussie]

@babel0wnage Always

[Uninserious]

I got 1 question, have you been caught masturbating, yourself?

[AngryAussie]

@Uninserious Not me

[AngryAussie]

@SerenaRoberson There's a lot of it about

[missystarr2334]

i cant stop masturbating even when i know im about to be caught.

i have four questions:

a) how young is too young?

b) how do i know if i have an addiction?

c) how do i break the addiction?

d) is twice a day too much?

[AngryAussie]

@missystarr2334 I'd say go with Mistress M's advice, if it gets to the stage where it's interfering with your life, you need to change things.

[CrazyBlackRainbowsss]

@missystarr2334 well theres no too younge age, i mean its our primal instinct to have sex. little kids who dont even know where babys come from can masturbate without knowing it. if you have to masturbate many times every day, you might be addicted. if you can go days or weeks without masturbating, your not addicted. if you wanna quit the addiction, you have to go cold turkey. twice a day is fine. masturbation is a stress reliever, so its healthy and helps stop pimples. but dont do it too much.

[mcjj1234]

At THE end THE cat looked like it was going to jump put of THE screen

[AngryAussie]

@mcjj1234 Boo is like that

[Pestocrac]

i hate when my dad caught me fapping in the bath tube... i felt like hanging myself

[AngryAussie]

@Pestocrac Don't go that far

[Pestocrac]

@AngryAussie lol

[TheUb3rpanda]

i got caught masturbating... it was really bad, i was caught when my sister's friend came over, i didn't know she came over, i had the door to my bedroom shut, and i didn't hear her, and she came into my room (probs to say hello), it haunts me everytime i masturbate :S

[AngryAussie]

@TheUb3rpanda And yet you still do it ;)

[youngie73]

hahaha midgit donkey porn LOL

[AngryAussie]

@youngie73 There's a lot of it about

[FrostbittenWolf]

Not sure if it actually happened, but whenever my co-workers talk about strange patients they've had one senior attending likes to bring up this story about how a mother brought a 13 year old boy in when she caught him flogging the bishop. I think for kids, the most important thing is to not let your mom catch you. They might drag your ass to the hospital and harass the receptionist.

[AngryAussie]

@FrostbittenWolf That would certainly suck

[blackoptimus1]

Very good. Dam I wanna get laid so bad, only 1 year to go then I'm legal.

[AngryAussie]

@blackoptimus1 Thanks for sharing

[ilovenick1234567890]

earlyer the better in the case of a guy. it has been proven you will be much better with girls through your life if u get it over and out of the way asap. because as ur identity is developed in your teenage years, u arnt always trying reach the near unobtainable

[AngryAussie]

@ilovenick1234567890 That makes no sense at all

[ilovenick1234567890]

@AngryAussie what part are u confuesed about

[AngryAussie]

@ilovenick1234567890 I'm not confused, I'm quite clear - that comment makes no sense and clearly shows a complete lack of meaningful life experience.

[uberethair]

not getting caught? well if you know other people are in, no sound and for the love of god no headphones XD

[AngryAussie]

@uberethair Gotta be aware of your surroundings

[uberethair]

@AngryAussie yupp :)

[Unexpect3D]

boo rulz

[meetjoblak]

the cat is like...sex this sex that..blah blah... just give my food already im hungry. lol

[AngryAussie]

@meetjoblak Boo wants cheesy poofs

[seathswift]

lol comment of the week goes to xxstunedxx, kudos lmao

[PlebScrubber]

OMG you can totally see her pussy...

[meteal666head09]

@PlebScrubber .../facepalm/ Did have to be said.

[DrakeMagnum]

thanks Boo

[AngryAussie]

@DrakeMagnum You're welcome

[WhatWeAllLove]

locking the door REALLY helps. unless your parents are also cps and happen to a have a battering ram in there ass its guna be pretty dam safe

[AngryAussie]

@WhatWeAllLove Or at least closing the door

[blueman4444444]

I gives a new meaning to the word wanker but its all good unless you do the american pie thing then you need a hospital trip.

[AngryAussie]

@blueman4444444 That's pretty disturbing

[dearestjanna]

Wait, does Boo require cheesy poofs before she allows Mistress M to advise? Spoiled kitty! Not that I'm not guilty of spoiling my own fat furball...

Door locks and doing double-checks (that one is alone, housemates are out, etc.) before having "a party of one" should be at the top of the pre-masturbatory checklist. ...if you have one...

[AngryAussie]

@dearestjanna Cheesy poofs are to bribe her to sit down

[xxstunedxx]

what to do when your parents catch you masturbating ? look em in the eye and finish like a beast :D

[AngryAussie]

@xxstunedxx Go you!

[Revilex100]

@AngryAussie Her pussy is very distracting :(

[xxstunedxx]

@AngryAussie hehe thanks

[HellaTasticable]

@xxstunedxx wow... thats hilarious... your parents might be scarred though...

[xxstunedxx]

@HellaTasticable they helped

[MarlasanLovesCake]

@xxstunedxx ROFL X3

[metallicification]

I had to watch this twice. I was looking at the cat the first time

[AngryAussie]

@metallicification Boo is distracting

[kamikazi6660]

wonder what she think of the anal fisting practice

[AngryAussie]

@kamikazi6660 Not recommended

[tunglour]

fap fap fap

and

"Two and a half Misogynists, I mean..."

[AngryAussie]

@tunglour It's a fabulous show

[americancarguy]

Can Mistress M give some dateing advice?

I have a hard to keeping relationship going they start out great then go down in flames about a few months in (and usually don't involve sex if only once) But the real problem I have is meeting guys, as I only know how to meet/date online and that's not working out well (a date ever year year and a half is getting old) I was hoping for some friendly advice. (and as the channel name would suggest I'm a guy :-) )

[AngryAussie]

@americancarguy I will pass on the question

[slytherinsheirx]

I'll be soon to be having wonderful sex, thank you. I fly out to be with my fiancee in 3 days time! ;)

[AngryAussie]

@slytherinsheirx WOOHOO! Go you!

[slytherinsheirx]

@AngryAussie Not that anyone wanted to know that of course, but :P *does the happy dance, or that the sexually frustrated dance... nobody knows...*

[drakeisbak18]

does Mistress M have her own channel, i would like to sub her, btw i havent been keeping up with your video so please excuse my ignorance, you rock angry aussie

[AngryAussie]

@drakeisbak18 Mistress M doesn't have the motivation to maintain her own channel :)

[mancredsp]

i like the pussy in the bg lolz haha :D

[AngryAussie]

@mancredsp I thought she was in the foreground

[mystikfly7]

she doesnt have a husband. treats her cats like royalty anddddd is definately one sexy woman.

[AngryAussie]

@mystikfly7 She has a boyfriend I wouldn't mess with

[Aaron4444444]

LOL midget donkey porn

[AngryAussie]

@Aaron4444444 It's out there

[LupusRexRgis]

So does it mean I should not risk masturbating to Brazilian Fart Porn? :-p

Jokes apart, this was a good video, btw. :-)

[AngryAussie]

@LupusRexRgis Blame it on a poltergeist

[Catchicken89]

I can never tell whether Mistress M is meant to be serious with some light-heartedness, or something else. I might also be heading towards a state of drunkenness.

Is there such a thing as porn involving love or something? It's hard to be turned on when you see porn stars going fast and hard and hear the sound of skin and flesh flapping about. IRL, you're more likely to give someone a friction burn than an orgasm with that...

[AngryAussie]

@Catchicken89 Entertaining and hopefully helpful

[AngryAussie]

@DismayOfficial She has a way with words

[duckmonsterX]

Probably worth noting that almost everyone will be caught batting one off from time to time. It happens, its embarassing, and you'll get over the shock.

Getting caught shagging your mates missus, yeah thats a bit more embarassing.

[AngryAussie]

@duckmonsterX And potentially painful

[Dipstikk]

THE UNTAMED WILDERNESS OF NIGEL THORNBERRY'S PUBIC HAIR

[bakamund]

@ 1:26 ~ the cat's got something away from the camera. O.O I'll eat all u miceeeee...rawr

[AngryAussie]

@bakamund She's fixated

[whoo689]

The jacking it in the office scenario Mistress M refers to reminds me of this one standup comedian whose name eludes me (he was Asian and/or part white I think, American) who filmed a fake scenario in an office where he was jerking it to porn. And then his boss came by and told him he needed to see him in the office. And the comedian came up with various options on how to respond to prevent your boss from knowing. and the worker came to the boss's office and had a boner. the boss got pissed.

[AngryAussie]

@whoo689 That sounds disturbing

[whoo689]

Is this filmed at her house, or does she have an office? Is she a sex therapist or something by trade? I noticed the huge chair.

[AngryAussie]

@whoo689 That's her place.

[DemonMasterAnsem]

Mistess M, Nice pussy. (OMGLOLOL PUN)

[Fingyfin]

The speed of sound is defined by the distance from door to computer divided by the time interval needed to close the media player and pull up your pants when your mum shouts "OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!"

[AngryAussie]

@Fingyfin The speed of embarrassment

[KingDega1]

It would be kinda nice if Mistress M gave advice on how to talk to girls and how to act on dates but that's not what she does. Too bad she only gives advice on sex :(

[AngryAussie]

@KingDega1 She can give advice on that too

[KingDega1]

@AngryAussie I hope so because I went on a date (or at least I thought it was supposed to be one) for the first time in my life today. I'm only 18 and she said she was a lesbian. I don't understand why she would have given me her number in the first place unless she's lying and I board her. It's possible she is and just wants friends for the summer but I can't tell. I have no experience but I did talk about her and NOT boast about myself. This really tore my confidence a new one. :(

[americancarguy]

@KingDega1

That sucks and is a horable way of getting out of a date.

[KingDega1]

@americancarguy I know. I would have preferred her to never return my calls then I would have known for sure that it was me. Now I'm wondering if I did screw up or if she really is a lesbian. Like I said she might just be looking for friends for the summer so she won't be board.

[UnlimitedDrillWorks]

my little brother saw me masturbating to cartoon porn, he walked away without saying anything.

[AngryAussie]

@UnlimitedDrillWorks Thanks for sharing

[Guest655321]

MOTHERFUCK I LOVE CATS

[AngryAussie]

@Guest655321 Good for you

[ApplePanda94]

Woop! Boo is back! I love that cat! =D

I have a strange urge to make some sort of pussy joke too... But I'll refrain.

Also, the advice about first time sex was actually pretty good! (Well, it's all good, but you know what I mean)

[AngryAussie]

@ApplePanda94 You wouldn't be the first

[JohnnyXFay]

I love Mistress M. :D

[AngryAussie]

@JohnnyXFay She does great work

[McBoothie94]

lol "if charlie sheen says no then its generally bad"

[AngryAussie]

@McBoothie94 There's not much he won't do

[CELTICS17PF]

midget donkey porn haha wtf!? so fucking funny

[AngryAussie]

@CELTICS17PF There's a lot of it about

[MWVercingetorix]

Adding my voice to the ones already pointing out your beautiful cat. :)

[AngryAussie]

@MWVercingetorix Why not :)

[AngryAussie]

@1h34rtmus1c That's the one

[AngryAussie]

@EvetscipE It's out there now!

[McAwsomeBurger]

mmmmm midget donkey porn

[AngryAussie]

@McAwsomeBurger for connoisseurs

[TheJWS]

@AngryAussie Awe yeah... that's my kind of shit.

[tripleJmovies]

@1h34rtmus1c

BUT ITS SO GOOD

[halo3guyy]

I had a bat while driving once and almost crashed :D

[AngryAussie]

@halo3guyy That will happen

[ApplePanda94]

@halo3guyy That could be awkward if you're found unconscious with your hand down your pants >.<

[hmsoctopus]

Wondering what my mum would say if she caught me watching this video . . .

[AngryAussie]

@hmsoctopus Unless she's really uptight I think she'd approve

[hmsoctopus]

@AngryAussie She disapproves of Cosmo and sex before marriage . . . so probably.

[fonkymaster]

Sexpert?

[AngryAussie]

@fonkymaster Exactly

[shorinjiryuu]

CHEESY POOFS =D YUMMM =P

[AngryAussie]

@shorinjiryuu So says Boo

[tripleJmovies]

If I'm violently masturbating to the point that my penis is bleeding, should I stop?

[AngryAussie]

@tripleJmovies Only long enough to write that comment

[thegeeohdee]

Q for Mistress M!

My boyfriend and I can't have sex at home, due to an abundant amount of "irrelevant" people- do you have any good suggestions for some nice private places out of the house?

<3

[thefreakface]

@thegeeohdee a motel room? theyre like $60 a night.

[AngryAussie]

@thegeeohdee NOT a parked car! You'll get busted.

[monizzle22]

Damn that cat, what did she say?! Love cats, just kiddin, but seriously, I used to be fond of jerking off on airplanes, and now they frown upon that. Thanks Bin Laden, you fucked it up for everybody.

[AngryAussie]

@monizzle22 Boo does that to people

[punkpasta123]

wait what... i was to distracted by the cat

[AngryAussie]

@punkpasta123 She does that

[Wonderkid44]

You're pretty hawt >_>

[AngryAussie]

@Wonderkid44 Thanks

[Awakentheend]

cat is cute lol.

[AngryAussie]

@Awakentheend Agreed

[popaddict]

Can we please have a video devoted just to Boo! That cat is amazing!

[AngryAussie]

@popaddict She sure is

[nishbrown]

I disagree with Charlie Sheen.

If one has a bit of exhibitionist in them, It is quite the thrill!

Road-head FTW!!

[AngryAussie]

@nishbrown One pothole and it's all gone

[havemercybabe]

WTF

[AngryAussie]

@EvetscipE You might have to wait 2 weeks for an answer

[oomsbun]

LOL MIDGIT DONKEY PRON ROFLCOPTER

[AngryAussie]

@oomsbun It's out there

[shadowgilgamesh]

i had to watch this vid twice because the first time i couldn't take my eyes of the cat and wasn't paying attention XD

[AngryAussie]

@shadowgilgamesh She has that effect

[hassiand]

When I get caught I just keep going :D

[AngryAussie]

@hassiand Show 'em who's boss!

[coolkelpie]

Omg that cat freaking rocks!

[AngryAussie]

@coolkelpie Boo is the best!

[Arthur40TwoDent]

Another great episode Mistress M

[AngryAussie]

@Arthur40TwoDent She knows her business

[PAPO1990]

if your having trouble finding privacy, there's always the bathroom, it's not comfortable, but it's save

[AngryAussie]

@PAPO1990 So long as there's a lock

[AngryAussie]

@KYLEZ0R09 Enjoy!

[123wowboy123]

lol @ cat in the background

[AngryAussie]

@123wowboy123 Or even the foreground

[hammer1727]

shes always got that smirk on her face.....makes me think shes a firecracker in the sack! :p

[AngryAussie]

@hammer1727 You and I will never know

[hammer1727]

@AngryAussie lololol

[redbaron9874]

@AngryAussie xD

[JukemDrawles89]

Oi, thats one fat pussy!

[AngryAussie]

@JukemDrawles89 That's the cheesy poofs

[OhEmGeeItsEmii]

Was anyone else just watching the cat the whole time..

[AngryAussie]

@OhEmGeeItsEmii She's hypnotic