Women almost always do the cooking, cleaning and handling the child raising. Oddly this seems to be the case, even when the woman works as much as the man.
A real world example:
It took years to convince my mother, who was not a stay at home mom, to stop doing my laundry when I vist.
one of the things I disliked about the military was the benevolence towards woman and age in terms of the PT standards. The hatches on board the boat weigh 200lbs regardless of these factors and if my life had depended on it, ¾ of the crew would not have been able to lift one to save my life; that was scary.
Hold on, I think you missed one point in Coughlans video. How are you suppose to differentiate between someone who is benevolently sexisy and someone who is just benevolent. The problem with your video on "benevolent sexism" is that you give no criteria for anyone to tell when they are behaving benevolently or being "benevolent sexist".
The men who get "offended" by women talking about sexism towards them are nothing but a bunch of assholes intending to derail the whole thing. It's ridiculous that women should be expected to make a long mention of injustices towards males while fighting against their own. Specific issues require specific attention and people who make vague claims about "oh well all of us face inequality" "it should be about equality, not just women" tend to not actually do anything to get to that equality.
it depends on the level of benevolent sexism. holding doors open is small shit, though ideally everyone should do it for everyone regardless of gender. when it gets into tings like forbidding women to do things because 'men need to protect the poor, dumb, fragile women', though, or valuing one gender's life over the other, that's when it gets out of hand.
Sexism is an ideology, and an ideology is a belief system that justifies an existing social arrangement in a society. The current social arrangement is that men, as a group, have more access to the resources of the society than women, as a group. Since men are not socially inferior to women, sexism against men is not possible. Prejudice and discrimination against men exist, and men are adversely affected by gender stereotypes and sexism against women, but sexism against men does not exist.
@SolitudesGrace Your flaw is that men are not "a group". What you really mean is "the very top men have more access to the resources of the society than everyone else". This is true. But let's now go down to the middle of society, where everyone lives. Middle women have just as much access to resources as middle men. Indeed, single women under the age of 30 make more money than single men under the age of 30.
Sexism against men does exist. Only men must register for selective service.
@SolitudesGrace Perfect fucking comment. Thankyou for actually knowing a thing about sociology or two. I can't believe how people think they can have opinions on matters they haven't studied in the slightest.
You fight for equality and are dealing with some of the same issues I do because of people that misunderstand what we are for.
Do you identify as a feminist?
If so I would really like your help to get a good movement on youtube going about "feminists against extremists"
because extremists do exist where men are treated badly just for being men, and it needs to be fixed just as much, but the entire movement shouldn't be hated for the extremists.
when talking about sexism I dont think it should be ignored that men and women actually ARE very different on average. Plenty of data suggest that men are from their simple biology much stronger than women and more intelligent. Now this is on average and nothing prevents individual women from being very intelligent or strong.. there is a large crossover. But the average is in fact there and noticable for most people. I think women should be given equal opportunity but not treated the same.
@idlenessss Men are more intelligent than women? I challenge you to cite research that isn't full of methodological flaws to back up your ridiculous claim.
@SolitudesGrace Not all men, just the very top men. Men dominate at the very top of the IQ distribution, but there is good news for women. Women dominate the middle of the IQ distribution. For men, there is greater variability - so that men dominate the top, but they also dominate at the very bottom, also.
Furthermore, we could conclude that all things men did for women because it was expected of them are all cases of sexism against men, AND that all the things women did for men, like childcare, homemaking, foraging, nursing, cooking, ect. because they assumed it was inappropriate for a man to do such things, are now to be understood as benevolent sexism against men. So now you see all of history and modern society is filled to the brim with the oppression of men by women. Howd'ya like dem apples?
Sexism towards men is redefined by feminists as benevolent sexism towards women.
Men dieing is historically considered nowhere near as terrible as women dieing.
Using boys in wars is acceptable but not women is sexism towards men.
Sexism against men in the modern world with child custody and divorce is vastly more evil than some guy holding a door open. It is always a focus on women, with some lame disclaimer to men and nothing more. The fact that you perpetuate that is sexist.
I dated a girl who thought I was sexist for doing all that you have said. ( trying to pay for dinner holding the door etc). She was the most horrible person I have ever had the displeasure of knowing. A hateful and genuinely sexist person.
I will continue to be polite to people of either sex however and sleep safe in the knowledge that the majority of people say thank you when I hold the door they don't accuse me of sexism.
Well, basically like your video, you are very well thought out and careful.
Just one question..
I know that in the grande scheme of things men had the power, and the powerful positions and women did not, however, given the fact that sexism fucks over both women AND men, is it really fair to be talking about a patriarchy?
Our culture evolved as a society, and women did influence it, this is not a completely male driven culture.
ok, negative sexism should disappear, but there is the problem of positive sexism; I, as an heterosexual man find myself being more apologetic towards (for me attractive) women than towards man, and I think the other way around also exists. Am I therefore a sexist? In the narrow meaning yes! But in the broader meaning I don't think so, it's just me, being a heterosexual man. And that is something I just was born with, so don't blame me for that?!?!
You were becoming quiet red at the beginning of the vid :p But good that you adress the stuff now ;) Haven't seen the first one, but sexism always goes both ways. We both (as in the sexes) are capable of doing it. But I do agree with you that women have suffered it more than men. Sexism is wrong. period. because you don't value the person as a person, but as a "sex". For example, if I would say Sarah Palin is an idiotic mindless woman, Im saying that not for her sexe, but for the person.
Well your right...Nuff said. There are few willing to walk away from the more romanticized points of sexism and historically gender biased roles. I'm male,30 love to cook good with kids and will happily step into a boxing ring or wrestling mat with a woman. I understand equality to an enlightened level but still on that nasty subconscious level have that ingrained "y r u not in the kitchen" element. Do you think we're hardwired to think that way?
It seems to me that the Internet's been broken because you haven't explicitly defined sexism and went straight to examples. Which is ironically exactly what you've said you'll try to avoid. Is simply taking someone's gender into account sexist? Is failure to completely suppress your biological imperatives sexist? Is making assumptions based on knowledge of someone's sexist cultural background sexist? If I open a heavy door for someone who looks fragile or whom I want to fuck or who expects me to
How did you get poison Ivy? ha You know what? Sometimes people just think too much about things Two types are in the world. Those who look at the positive in others, and those who want to pick fights
I would like to know your opinion about different standards for men/women in occupations, specifically athletic ones. Women firefighters/soldiers for example have lower standards than men with regards to physical qualifications. The same goes for sporting. Think olympics or mens/womens leagues. In many olympics sports for example, men's times are faster, distances farther, scores higher. Is dividing the competition a form of putting women down or elevating them?
I think that most examples of sexism affect everyone negatively.
Example 1: Man pays for woman's dinner: It's not fair that the man has to pay for something they both enjoyed, and it's not fair that the woman is expected to be cared for.
Example 2: Woman 'automatically' gets the children after a divorce: It's not fair that the woman is expected to take better care for the children because she's a woman, and it's not fair that the man is marked as inferior to a woman when it comes to parenting.
@ListenerOfShadows response 1: It's tradition - besides odds are if you ever have children together the guy will be the only earner in the family for a few years.
response 2: As a man that;s cared for 2 young children for 2 days - I am certain that although i like the thought of keeping the kids it would end up in a mental breakdown and general disaster before the end of the first fortnight.
.
The reason for both of these is simple - despite the wishes of feminists, men and women are different
@neverfearchrisishere The biological differences are constantly getting exaggerated and reinforced by culture and tradition, which, in itself is probably the worst reason for anything (right next to religion). Also, I don't believe that you are the representative for all males on this planet. There are even men who are happy about caring for their kids without any females on their sides (for example some single fathers, or gay male couples). Humans are too versatile for stupid roles.
I hear what you are saying, but it is unrealistic to ever expect we will reach a point in time where men don't take notice of the fact that women have curves, a vagina, and boobs. I certainly wouldn't want to live in that type of world.
Egalitarianism goes against our nature. And no, I'm not a bad person for having said as much.
my dad's friend used a serroget mother to have a child, nobody cared, but when it came out to be a girl concidering he was a yound bachelor the state tried do have her taken from him. Luckily he was aloud to keep his duaghter and not much trouble was made of it
There are costs and benefits to everything - you therefore unless a situational analysis must follow if changes are proposed.vAlso, everyone is sexist (even if we are speaking of types and degrees) - the word loses much of its meaning.
It is probably enough to hold that all citizens have equal political and economic rights. The Watson/RD case simply proved to many of us that some have a shallow and even silly conceptualization of what sexism is. Dangerous, as it devalues the term.
My brother lives with a bunch of girls that are constantly giving him cooking tips cuz they assume he can't cook. When he asked for their help ONE TIME, one said 'don't worry, you're a man'
Isn't sexism the expectation of (or restriction of) rights or special privileges based on gender? The way I see it, opening a door is nice. not sexist. A person expecting me to open the door for them BECAUSE they're a female or a male...that's sexism.
so in summary: if someone is denied a right or privilege(minor or major) based mainly on their gender, sexism. If someone expects a right or privelege based mainly on their gender, it's sexism. ja?
What on earth are you apologizing for??? You made an interesting video, making good points, that should have left all of us either smarter or equally smart than before we watched it.
Not mentioning certain aspects of sexism doesn't mean you deny they exist or that you belittle their existence. It just means that they weren't necessarily relevant to the point you were making. It's not your fault if some people can't figure that out on their own.
@healthyaddict I have a little mantra for situations like this, it's served me well and I'd like you to have it. When the bozon level is off the scale, simply take a deep breath and speak thus:
"If we kill all the idiots there's be no one left."
Actually that doesn't help much does it? Oh well, have it anyway.
@ASKaPHYSICIST Are you inept? She is apologising because her video was being perceived as sexist. Representing one aspect which is based on somebody's sex, and not representing one aspect which is based on the opposite sex, is the definition of sexism. Her video portrayed that women are the only party whom are negatively affected by sexism. It is sexist for both men and women equally when a man is expected to pay for a woman's meals. Just different types.
@BeeEmmCee1 no and you're wrong. Her video was about explaining the concept of benevolent sexism and what examples she uses is irrelevant. She could have made a video about cook books and just so happen to only give examples of female authors. Same principle and it's not sexist!
If I make a video about benevolent racism and only mention examples of benevolent racism towards white people doesn't mean I'm racist towards blacks, Hispanics, Asians and Eskimos. Go get a clue!
@ASKaPHYSICIST She defines hostile sexism as 'sexism where you put a woman down'. That is an incorrect definition, as hostile sexism is 'where you put someone down based on their sex'. People are complaining that she poorly represented what sexism is. If you made a video about racism and you defined racism as 'putting someone down because they're Hispanic' you would be just as moronic as healthyaddict. Sure it is ONE definition of racism, but specifying one race in your definition is RACIST.
@BeeEmmCee1 you're knit-picking, when every person with a functioning brain would have realised the point she was trying to make. When I say: "a fight is where you punch each other and a play fight is where you pretend to punch each other" you wouldn't complain about the fact that I failed to mention that you can also kick each other in a fight. You don't always have to state the OBVIOUS.
I guess she assumed you knew the definition of general sexism ... that was her only flaw.
@ASKaPHYSICIST No, that is not true at all. You're comparing apples to lemons. Her definition of the topic conflicts with the meaning of sexism. She is being sexist by omitting men in her definition. If I said to a group of African Americans that the definition of racism is when black people treat white people unfairly, how do you think they would react? Do you think they would just think to themselves 'He obviously just means any race, he just forgot to mention them'. No, they wouldn't.
@BeeEmmCee1 In a similar situation, where the context of the statement is obvious, why wouldn't they? I just did exactly that! Are you being a racist now?
@ASKaPHYSICIST Well okay, you're obviously delusional and you're no longer being rational in your argument. I'm done here. Let me know when you have the capability of acknowledging a point instead of conceding to childish fallacies. My point WASN'T that certain groups and stereotypes will react differently, but that it is the ONUS of the person making a statement or definition to either speak generally in phrase that accommodates most view points, or include each viewpoint specifically. Logic.
@BeeEmmCee1@BeeEmmCee1 You're obviously not fit to watch videos that require you to think and appreciate context as opposed to making everything simple and obvious for you. Why don't you go back to watching Sesame street and leave us to our preferred choice of media.
@ASKaPHYSICIST So this type of media is only for people who agree with it's messages! How silly of me thinking that I was allowed to have an opinion on something in a public place. I have not once argued that the context of her video was incorrect. I agree with what she's saying, I just don't think she presented it in a fair manner. You've sunk to a level of adolescence, with childish insults and an elitist view point, instead of acknowledging anything I said in my counter argument. Give up.
I can actually think some really common examples of benevolent sexism towards men. For instance, women frequently buy men clothes (either their sons or husbands), to the point that the majority of men's underwear is bought by women. There are a huge number of men who are incapable of cooking anything that doesn't involve a barbecue, and large swaths of society seem to be under the impression that men are simply incapable of learning how to sort whites from colours in the wash.
@Everstruggling Those are some very old stereotypes. And having a woman buying you all your underwear could have a horrific outcome.For example i have some really traumatizing memories of my grandma buying me boxers with disney characters on them when i was a teen -_-
As for the cooking, may i remind you that most if not all well-known chefs are men. But anyhow, gender is not defined by the ability to do everyday choires.
@joakeimmcgrath I didn't comment on defining gender; I wrote about benevolent sexism towards men. Like it or not, it still happens. For most people Mom cooks the meals, not Dad. I know nearly every woman in this building because I do most of our laundry. I've met very few of the men, and the ones I have met are all single. When I shop for clothes I'm almost always outnumbered by women in the men's section. Of course there are exceptions. There are exceptions to everything.
@Everstruggling Well, technically all those things you've mentioned have developed as a behavioral pattern while we were evolving from hunter-gatherer society into industrialized one. That's unless you're one of those of those religious northern americans who don't like the word "evolution".
But this pretty much more of a "habit" behavior than "prejudice" or "sexism". There's no actual assumption that men are incapable to do certain things.Just that they simply don't do them.
@joakeimmcgrath So... you think it is less sexist for a person to say, "I'll do the laundry because you either won't do it or won't do it right." Than to say, "I'll do the laundry because you incapable of doing it." Gotta say, I think they are both pretty damn sexist.
All sexism is, is a "habit" evaluating a person's rights, responsibilities or abilities based on their sex. It doesn't matter if it's because you think that they can't, won't or shouldn't do something.
My neighbors across the street are a married couple. The female around the size of an average grizzly bear.The male is a puny little guy with a hernia.
So one day i overheard the bear lady screaming "Would you move that goddamn closet already? I've just had my nails done. You're the man of the house, aren't you?"
Is that considered sexism in North America or not?
@Everstruggling Separating whites and colours in the wash is like ironing underwear; time consuming and unnecessary. I've been doing laundry for twenty years, not once ever have I separated them; it took my wife about three years before she noticed, and only because she saw me putting the load in the washer.
@tml4873 It's funny, I was having this conversation with a friend of mine who agrees with you. He also, coincidentally, doesn't own any truly white t-shirts... at least compared to mine... at least not six months after he's bought them. Perhaps I'm just lucky my shirts tend to stay showroom white a year after I've bought them... or maybe it's because I separate them. I might be superstitious, but I'm going to keep separating them just to be on the safe side.
Saying that everyone is sexist is a very bold statement, and when dealing with humans, using absolutes is usually a red flag for a weak argument. I think it would be more accurate to say that many or most people are sexist, and at the same time some people act contrary to a society's culture and are gender neutral.
@nathan98000 I'm working in absolutes here for simplicity. As research presently stands, it shows that everyone is a bit sexist/ageist/racist etc. It all just falls along a continuum, and is not just black and white.
@boroncarbide Yes I am. It is absurd to ascribe any particular behavior to every single person on the planet. That's one of the reasons I think femisim is akin to religion. They hold idiotic beliefs without evidence just because it feels right to them.
I've asked several times for the research on this ridiculous assertion and neither Ashley nor anyone else has been able to provide any data. But hey I respect your FAITH position.
@healthyaddict That kind of thinking gives credence to endless reforms to get rid of sexism racism ect, in an eternal war, its absurd. there is a point where sexism and racism are not significant. Where the cure is not worth the cost. Feminism is here because nobody acknowledges that point, when even opening up a door for a woman is sexism, we know that the feminist lust for bashing men will never be quenched.
I confess, I am a bit sexist. I usually open the car door for women and do in general all the little things that are now considered to be sexist nowadays. Not because I do think women can not handle themselfes, but to show my appreciation. But nowadays I kinda feel lost and whatever I do is wrong. Open a door for a woman - your sexist. Don,t - your an asshole. It would be helpful if women would accept that equality should work for both sides instead of changing the rules every time it fits them.
@Furzkampfbomber Well most women are going to expect that sort of behavior, because it is so ingrained into our culture. I'm not asking one to change it (at this point of the series), however only to recognize that anytime one does an act for one only one sex and not for the other sex, it is a sexist act. Whether or not that sexist act is 'harmful' or 'wrong' is another question at large.
@healthyaddict I see your point and, since I am aware of what I am doing here, completely agree with you. And I get why women don,t like men doing this. My only problem, like already said, is that modern men can get easily lost since women often (rightfully) emphasize that they can take care of things on their own - but only as long as it suits their book. One moment they want equality, next moment chivalry. Changing the rules like this can be kind of an agressive and sexist act itselft.
@healthyaddict Anyway, I am watching your channel for quite some time now and usually enjoy your view on things. And you seem to be a very confident and resourceful person, so may I ask...
What do you think when some guy opens the door for you or wants to hold the coat for you? Providing he seems to do so as an act of appreciation and not in a patronizing way?
@Furzkampfbomber Women are individuals, I don't think it's realistic to ask half the population to have the same opinion about something. Opening a door for a woman - fine. Making her wait in the car until you get out and open the door for her - sexist.
@jgoemat I really do not want to start a debate on principles here, just wanted to point out that life is not easy for men too sometimes. But just for the record - I don,t make anyone wait, I usually just open the door before whe gets INTO the car. xD
LOL! I'm transgendered.. get hit going both ways... sometimes by myself. Walk a block in my shoes and gender becomes a meaningless concept. Funny when I'm a man in a dress how other men will hold the door for me. Much to be said about social conditioning. How many men today know that you lead a woman down the stairs and follow her up... so that if she falls you can catch her?
It's aggravating to watch you coddle some of the cry babies that posted. Does sexism go both ways? Yes. Is sexism against men as prevalent and damaging as it is against women? Fuck no. Are there instances of "reverse racism"? Sure. Does this mean we should coddle angry (and usually blatantly racist) white people who cry about reverse racism as though it's endemic and just as bad as the racism minorities experience? Of course not. That woud be *silly*. Everyone who complained needs to GROW UP.
Poor silly girl, don't you know that tromping through poison ivy is the men's job? So don't worry your pretty little head and... and... oh damn. Guess your right.
To everyone saying that your not sexist/racist at all: In my experience this actually makes you more likely to do sexist/racist things unconsciously, because unlike me you're not watching yourself and analyzing your actions with that in mind. Why would you if you never do that?
I've reached a point in my life where I feel comfortable holding doors open for people based on proximity alone. Age, race or gender don't enter in to it.
I'm told that I carry concepts to extremes at times, though. Just last Tuesday, I held an elevator for a family of four. I was scolded by security for "letting a bunch of coons" into the building.
As it turns out, my sexism and racism education doesn't extent to different species. I think it's because racoons can't get credit cards.
I'm really excited to see your next videos on this topic; I'm interested on hearing more about your research.
I'm sorry you got poison ivy all over yo'self D: I'd hug you but then I'd itch...
Oh, and don't mind the people freaking out all over you... this is a touchy/uncomfortable subject for some people... and when some people get uncomfortable they lash out in whatever way they can :)
Especially if they place a lot of value on being chivalrous... >_>
What about when women objectify themselves for emotional or physical gain? It that reverse benevolent sexism? Ash...maybe you were sleep-walking and hiked through some P-Ivy? : )
@interagreed - Yes and no. It is also meant to have people relax just a bit and realize that making racist assumptions maybe isn't the same level of racist as saying "all black people are criminals" or the like - and doesn't deserve the same level of hostility. It is also accurate and tested, everyone really is a little bit racist. What matters more is how you deal with that and whether you attempt to move beyond it.
@j03y2fly - Because the topic at hand is: we all do it, and some of it we're not going to be able to help, so it's "okay"... but "okay" doesn't mean good, and "okay" doesn't mean not somewhat harmful, it sort of implies that it's something we have to learn to live with.
Maybe kind of like... getting little bumps and scratches is "okay", it's not fun, and it's not good, but it's not really all that bad either.
@healthyaddict why can't a woman be chivalrous? there's nothing wrong with chivalry, but when it has to be only men that are assumed to be chivalrous is when i see something wrong.
im not sexist or racist AT ALL, and yes I claim that with my reputation at hand. im glad you apologized about neglecting to clarify about sexism towards men in your previous video. I have resubscribed.
@j03y2fly Well actually... that is pretty much impossible lol
Explicit racism/sexism? sure. Its totally possible to not harbor views that other genders or races are inferior, and to make bigoted comments. I have seen no reason in your vids/comments to think you have those.
However, those implicit, unconscious views that we DONT think about are outside of our control. They have done studies where non racist people take slightly longer to describe an african face picture as "smart" or "kind"
@j03y2fly I would say the best example that I have would be of my friend josh (totally nice guy, thoughtful, smart, articulate, actually in broadcasting at a native canadian television station [despite being white-scottish])
one time a native guy walked up to him downtown and asked him what time it was, and he replied "im sorry I dont have any change", and then INSTANTLY felt horrible and apologized about a million times.
@squirrelywrath2 but thats hurtful and Really sexist. ive never done such a thing. moreover, is it sexist when someone asks you what ethnic background do you believe this person is based on their name, and you accumulate everyone you'd ever known with that name and come to the conclusion that the odds of that person having that name is that ethnicity?
@PurpleGhost People who condone rape are sick. Just because she is a female who votes Democrat dosn't make it right. You people are sick.... Rape is alway wrong!!
I think a lot of men are overeacting about this; rather than try to have a discussion, many are just levelling a charge of sexism.
Just because sexism against men wasn't discussed doesn't entail an ignorance or endorsement of it. The sheer majority of sexism still occurs against women, and that's why it is still most discussed. Sexism against men should be discussed, but at the moment the attitudes of the proponants of such a discussion are in-fact slowly destroying their own chance.
I'm saddened that Ashley continues to espouse the myth that everyone is sexist. Using a cute song sadly proves nothing and is the sort of tactic that one with no evidence resorts to. I'm starting to believe based on the evidence of the last few videos that Ashley has switched off reason where her involvement in the cult of feminism is concerned. Very disappointing.
Just because someone is an atheist does not mean they are always rational.
@AirplaneRider Hun I'm not talking about feminism here. I'm talking about well-studied psychological research on sexism. Feminism is a different topic.
Would I identify as feminist? Yes, and sure there are some circles that overlap here, but sexism by definition does not equal feminism.
@AirplaneRider I don't think it's a hige reach of healthyaddict to draw thie conclusion that everyone is sexist. We live in a world that treat's people based on inaccurate gender stereotypes. Because we are socialised as children in this society, we are unable to avoid adopting some of these habits. We can through conscious practice recognise and then eliminate sexism from our vocabulary and thought, but it's a process. I know very few people who have succeeded at this 100%.
I talk a bit about this in my most recent video. A lot of this stems from the Protestant Christian belief instilled in our country. Women used to stopped existing once married, lost all properties or trusts, and were not allowed certain things (and still today with the draft) because they were viewed as belonging in the home while the husband worked (derives from Genesis 3:16). Maybe I'll do a follow up as a video response to this :D
You could probably try drawing some kind of comparison between benevolent sexism and spoiling children.
Nobody has any kind of problem with the idea that giving everything to kids, and never challenging them, produces people with no character, or faith in their own agency. Look at Paris Hilton, she got all kinds of perks, did it make her a better person?
Sometimes people need kindness, and sometimes they need to see themselves overcome failure and rejection, and be ok with it.
I used to work in an office where I was the only male.
One day I had my head down working when I was suddenly jerked back into the room when I overheard my female colleagues discussing the fact that they never let their husbands/boyfriends hang washing on a line.
One of them said "Men just can't do that".
So I looked up and said "Do you think there is a gene for it?"
It's funny, I hold doors for anyone behind me and if they are close behind me I'll often allow them to go in first after I've opened the door. Male or female doesn't matter. I find it rather insulting when I occasionally get dirty looks from women for doing something I think is just polite especially since I'm not singling them out for the behavior. Most people seem to appreciate it and I've had a lot of other men and women do the same for me so I know I'm not the only one.
There's nothing wrong with taking your girlfriend out for dinner. It's what you do when you're courting. It is all part of the natural reproductive process. And if you're a girl... there's nothing wrong with taking your boyfriend out for dinner either :p
Get a cortisone shot and scrub with denatured mineral spirits while under continuously running water. Plant oils can stay on clothing for up to 3 years so, wash the contaminated articles with denatured mineral spirits as well.
Dear sociologists, please look up sexual dimorphism. Then look up sexual selection. You can blame your ancestors for this. It is not merely social convention that causes sexism.
When I was six, being babysat in a local babysitter program, where you'd have maybe 30 kids and a few babysitters. I remember the babysitters being sexist against the boys. They had simple bathrooms, just a toilet and sink. If a girl was in the bathroom the door was shut but if a boy was using the bathroom the babysitters wouldn't allow us to shut the door. Also on hot days when they would bring out the plastic pools outside they would force the boys to change outside in the open.
Even if the bathrooms were free they wouldn't allow us to use them. To this day I don't know if any of them were charged with sexual abuse (probably not). But to this day I haven't forgotten their faces, if I ever bump into one of them they will get a nice punch in the mouth. I always laugh when people think girls are more victimized than boys, think about that when most babysitters are woman, which gender do you think gets it worse?
@PseudoPoiesis first of all you have to understand that being a man and woman is not being the same girls play with barbie dolls when they are kids whereas boys dont women like pink usually men choose another color women dress differently than men they wear skirts lingerie etc men dont hence that also leads us to another logical conclusion that men and women have different perceptions relating to colors dress toys and many other things . proving what i said before,they think different socially
@farazazhar1 The colour pink has only been associated with femininity for about 80-90 years or so. Historically, pink was a boy's colour because it represented passion and virility, while blue was often a girl's colour, because it represented demure obeisance and was associated with the Virgin Mary.
@FamilyGuyRS These acts, usually lumped under "chivalry", have their foundations in a sexist culture:putting women on pedestals, assuming women shouldn't engage in physical exertion, assuming every woman (or at least every attractive woman) is a delicate flower, assuming women are incapable of earning their own money (which comes with the implication their affection can be bought). It's not the act that is sexist, it's the culture that normalized the reasons that is.
Better stop touching your chest with those poison ivy hands because those swellings are getting pretty ... OK, I'll just leave it there. Your swellings are getting pretty. See? That's sexist. If you were a man I would say something like - those swellings are getting strong and brave.
Sexism exists because women & men have fundamental differences & most people are too STUPID to compensate. A certain combination of time & awareness are the only cures. Believe it!
After years of condescending to women, advertisers realized that women were involved in 70% of spending decisions, so they stopped....but NOW, they almost NEVER have the women in the commercial the bad/weak/stupid person...every woman is brilliant an ethereal, and every man is a freakin' idiot.
I can't believe this kind of blatant pandering ACTUALLY appeals to women, it's just that advertisers are still just as stupid as before.
However, they've also shifted the pressure onto women to now be some kind of superwoman, or consider themselves a failure. But don't worry, because Product X will make you that superwoman!!!!
Isn't that what advertising is about, though? Selling unrealistic expectations, and creating new ones?
@SiriusMined I don't think it appeals to women. I don't have a proper sample size but I know it pisses me the ever loving hell off. Actually there are plenty of cases where the woman is an idiot, but she's often more 'oblivious' than actively stupid. Its easier to notice wrongs against oneself personally than wrongs against people who are different. Its usually best to step outside ones shoes and look at something from all angles. I often find that things are sexist towards both sides.
Phew - thanks - just seen this video after your other video...
We hear so much about sexism towards women and so little about the converse...
jagara1 1 week ago
Love yoour videos.
Examples of benevolent sexism toward men.
Women almost always do the cooking, cleaning and handling the child raising. Oddly this seems to be the case, even when the woman works as much as the man.
A real world example:
It took years to convince my mother, who was not a stay at home mom, to stop doing my laundry when I vist.
mich4405 1 week ago in playlist Sexism 101
one of the things I disliked about the military was the benevolence towards woman and age in terms of the PT standards. The hatches on board the boat weigh 200lbs regardless of these factors and if my life had depended on it, ¾ of the crew would not have been able to lift one to save my life; that was scary.
mikesnavy 3 weeks ago
This has been flagged as spam show
@Healthyaddict
Hold on, I think you missed one point in Coughlans video. How are you suppose to differentiate between someone who is benevolently sexisy and someone who is just benevolent. The problem with your video on "benevolent sexism" is that you give no criteria for anyone to tell when they are behaving benevolently or being "benevolent sexist".
EmperorLibertarian 1 month ago
nice video, good way of thinking , you're hot, how old are you? xD
ziatco 1 month ago
The men who get "offended" by women talking about sexism towards them are nothing but a bunch of assholes intending to derail the whole thing. It's ridiculous that women should be expected to make a long mention of injustices towards males while fighting against their own. Specific issues require specific attention and people who make vague claims about "oh well all of us face inequality" "it should be about equality, not just women" tend to not actually do anything to get to that equality.
spilledinsanity 2 months ago
it depends on the level of benevolent sexism. holding doors open is small shit, though ideally everyone should do it for everyone regardless of gender. when it gets into tings like forbidding women to do things because 'men need to protect the poor, dumb, fragile women', though, or valuing one gender's life over the other, that's when it gets out of hand.
froggymicwop 2 months ago
Benevolent sexism is good because it leads to the protection of girls and women, who by their nature are the weaker and more fragile sex.
shmiggen 2 months ago
Just a creative inquiry - How racist on average are blind people?
gaaraman082 2 months ago in playlist More videos from healthyaddict
Sexism is an ideology, and an ideology is a belief system that justifies an existing social arrangement in a society. The current social arrangement is that men, as a group, have more access to the resources of the society than women, as a group. Since men are not socially inferior to women, sexism against men is not possible. Prejudice and discrimination against men exist, and men are adversely affected by gender stereotypes and sexism against women, but sexism against men does not exist.
SolitudesGrace 3 months ago
@SolitudesGrace Your flaw is that men are not "a group". What you really mean is "the very top men have more access to the resources of the society than everyone else". This is true. But let's now go down to the middle of society, where everyone lives. Middle women have just as much access to resources as middle men. Indeed, single women under the age of 30 make more money than single men under the age of 30.
Sexism against men does exist. Only men must register for selective service.
shmiggen 2 months ago
@SolitudesGrace Perfect fucking comment. Thankyou for actually knowing a thing about sociology or two. I can't believe how people think they can have opinions on matters they haven't studied in the slightest.
spilledinsanity 2 months ago
You fight for equality and are dealing with some of the same issues I do because of people that misunderstand what we are for.
Do you identify as a feminist?
If so I would really like your help to get a good movement on youtube going about "feminists against extremists"
because extremists do exist where men are treated badly just for being men, and it needs to be fixed just as much, but the entire movement shouldn't be hated for the extremists.
-subscribed btw-
XXBleedingrose 3 months ago in playlist Sexism 101
I like you.
MissSlumpdump 3 months ago
Wonderland vid again, I shall make a special vid for you - goodness knows it has been a long time in my musing.
skyzthelimi7 3 months ago
when talking about sexism I dont think it should be ignored that men and women actually ARE very different on average. Plenty of data suggest that men are from their simple biology much stronger than women and more intelligent. Now this is on average and nothing prevents individual women from being very intelligent or strong.. there is a large crossover. But the average is in fact there and noticable for most people. I think women should be given equal opportunity but not treated the same.
idlenessss 3 months ago
@idlenessss Men are more intelligent than women? I challenge you to cite research that isn't full of methodological flaws to back up your ridiculous claim.
SolitudesGrace 3 months ago
@SolitudesGrace Not all men, just the very top men. Men dominate at the very top of the IQ distribution, but there is good news for women. Women dominate the middle of the IQ distribution. For men, there is greater variability - so that men dominate the top, but they also dominate at the very bottom, also.
shmiggen 2 months ago
'patriarchy' theory blames men alone, so you're doing it again.
Women tend to elect men to positions of 'dominance' (Aries, E. 1996, Oxford)
sexismBusters 4 months ago
Furthermore, we could conclude that all things men did for women because it was expected of them are all cases of sexism against men, AND that all the things women did for men, like childcare, homemaking, foraging, nursing, cooking, ect. because they assumed it was inappropriate for a man to do such things, are now to be understood as benevolent sexism against men. So now you see all of history and modern society is filled to the brim with the oppression of men by women. Howd'ya like dem apples?
ObserveReality 4 months ago
Sexism towards men is redefined by feminists as benevolent sexism towards women.
Men dieing is historically considered nowhere near as terrible as women dieing.
Using boys in wars is acceptable but not women is sexism towards men.
Sexism against men in the modern world with child custody and divorce is vastly more evil than some guy holding a door open. It is always a focus on women, with some lame disclaimer to men and nothing more. The fact that you perpetuate that is sexist.
ObserveReality 4 months ago
I dated a girl who thought I was sexist for doing all that you have said. ( trying to pay for dinner holding the door etc). She was the most horrible person I have ever had the displeasure of knowing. A hateful and genuinely sexist person.
I will continue to be polite to people of either sex however and sleep safe in the knowledge that the majority of people say thank you when I hold the door they don't accuse me of sexism.
Avoidnow 4 months ago
@Avoidnow I wouldn't consider anyone sexist for holding a door, unless they let it slam on someone else because of their sex.
It's just one bitch, there's more out there, but most of us fight for equality, love, freedom, acceptance, etc for all.
Not just for women.
XXBleedingrose 3 months ago in playlist Sexism 101
Well, basically like your video, you are very well thought out and careful.
Just one question..
I know that in the grande scheme of things men had the power, and the powerful positions and women did not, however, given the fact that sexism fucks over both women AND men, is it really fair to be talking about a patriarchy?
Our culture evolved as a society, and women did influence it, this is not a completely male driven culture.
bla34112 5 months ago in playlist Sexism 101
ok, negative sexism should disappear, but there is the problem of positive sexism; I, as an heterosexual man find myself being more apologetic towards (for me attractive) women than towards man, and I think the other way around also exists. Am I therefore a sexist? In the narrow meaning yes! But in the broader meaning I don't think so, it's just me, being a heterosexual man. And that is something I just was born with, so don't blame me for that?!?!
leroidelarue1 5 months ago
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leroidelarue1 5 months ago
I disagree, most people are somewhat racist of somewhat sexist. Not all. There is a few people which are not in at least one of those categories.
Terje1337 5 months ago in playlist Flere videoer fra healthyaddict
You were becoming quiet red at the beginning of the vid :p But good that you adress the stuff now ;) Haven't seen the first one, but sexism always goes both ways. We both (as in the sexes) are capable of doing it. But I do agree with you that women have suffered it more than men. Sexism is wrong. period. because you don't value the person as a person, but as a "sex". For example, if I would say Sarah Palin is an idiotic mindless woman, Im saying that not for her sexe, but for the person.
toverkleet 5 months ago
Well your right...Nuff said. There are few willing to walk away from the more romanticized points of sexism and historically gender biased roles. I'm male,30 love to cook good with kids and will happily step into a boxing ring or wrestling mat with a woman. I understand equality to an enlightened level but still on that nasty subconscious level have that ingrained "y r u not in the kitchen" element. Do you think we're hardwired to think that way?
Lordpoison67 5 months ago
It seems to me that the Internet's been broken because you haven't explicitly defined sexism and went straight to examples. Which is ironically exactly what you've said you'll try to avoid. Is simply taking someone's gender into account sexist? Is failure to completely suppress your biological imperatives sexist? Is making assumptions based on knowledge of someone's sexist cultural background sexist? If I open a heavy door for someone who looks fragile or whom I want to fuck or who expects me to
27182818284590452354 5 months ago
@27182818284590452354 ..., am I sexist? What if we are of the same sex?
27182818284590452354 5 months ago
Greta Christina is the best writer on this subject, it all goes both ways
shandcunt 5 months ago
Press 6 then 7
LOLOLOLO
pythor2 5 months ago
How did you get poison Ivy? ha You know what? Sometimes people just think too much about things Two types are in the world. Those who look at the positive in others, and those who want to pick fights
HYPNOTICVIDEO 5 months ago
I would like to know your opinion about different standards for men/women in occupations, specifically athletic ones. Women firefighters/soldiers for example have lower standards than men with regards to physical qualifications. The same goes for sporting. Think olympics or mens/womens leagues. In many olympics sports for example, men's times are faster, distances farther, scores higher. Is dividing the competition a form of putting women down or elevating them?
KittJT2 5 months ago
I think that most examples of sexism affect everyone negatively.
Example 1: Man pays for woman's dinner: It's not fair that the man has to pay for something they both enjoyed, and it's not fair that the woman is expected to be cared for.
Example 2: Woman 'automatically' gets the children after a divorce: It's not fair that the woman is expected to take better care for the children because she's a woman, and it's not fair that the man is marked as inferior to a woman when it comes to parenting.
ListenerOfShadows 5 months ago
@ListenerOfShadows response 1: It's tradition - besides odds are if you ever have children together the guy will be the only earner in the family for a few years.
response 2: As a man that;s cared for 2 young children for 2 days - I am certain that although i like the thought of keeping the kids it would end up in a mental breakdown and general disaster before the end of the first fortnight.
.
The reason for both of these is simple - despite the wishes of feminists, men and women are different
neverfearchrisishere 5 months ago
@neverfearchrisishere The biological differences are constantly getting exaggerated and reinforced by culture and tradition, which, in itself is probably the worst reason for anything (right next to religion). Also, I don't believe that you are the representative for all males on this planet. There are even men who are happy about caring for their kids without any females on their sides (for example some single fathers, or gay male couples). Humans are too versatile for stupid roles.
ListenerOfShadows 5 months ago
Hope you will do more singing in your videos. I haven't seen too many yet, maybe you do.
ngneer999 6 months ago
Benevolent sexism towards men: patriarchal cultures stereo-typically have women cooking for men.
jesuped 6 months ago
I hear what you are saying, but it is unrealistic to ever expect we will reach a point in time where men don't take notice of the fact that women have curves, a vagina, and boobs. I certainly wouldn't want to live in that type of world.
Egalitarianism goes against our nature. And no, I'm not a bad person for having said as much.
HansKJones 6 months ago
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HansKJones 6 months ago
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HansKJones 6 months ago
my dad's friend used a serroget mother to have a child, nobody cared, but when it came out to be a girl concidering he was a yound bachelor the state tried do have her taken from him. Luckily he was aloud to keep his duaghter and not much trouble was made of it
obcflife97 6 months ago
spent the whole time watching pac man eating her boob lol.
spadeyomoma 6 months ago
what, were you giving head to your 70 year old professor in the poison ivy to get promoted for something?
gajda1984 6 months ago
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gajda1984 6 months ago
Ashley
There are costs and benefits to everything - you therefore unless a situational analysis must follow if changes are proposed.vAlso, everyone is sexist (even if we are speaking of types and degrees) - the word loses much of its meaning.
It is probably enough to hold that all citizens have equal political and economic rights. The Watson/RD case simply proved to many of us that some have a shallow and even silly conceptualization of what sexism is. Dangerous, as it devalues the term.
timothygmd 6 months ago
My brother lives with a bunch of girls that are constantly giving him cooking tips cuz they assume he can't cook. When he asked for their help ONE TIME, one said 'don't worry, you're a man'
Booyakasha! beneficial sexism toward men!
WhyKeepPiranhas 6 months ago
Once women got rights they turned into bitches. Just saying.
MRBRiANSART 6 months ago
You don't really look like much of a mess to me.
unoffended 6 months ago
Isn't sexism the expectation of (or restriction of) rights or special privileges based on gender? The way I see it, opening a door is nice. not sexist. A person expecting me to open the door for them BECAUSE they're a female or a male...that's sexism.
so in summary: if someone is denied a right or privilege(minor or major) based mainly on their gender, sexism. If someone expects a right or privelege based mainly on their gender, it's sexism. ja?
conceptualuniverse 6 months ago
What on earth are you apologizing for??? You made an interesting video, making good points, that should have left all of us either smarter or equally smart than before we watched it.
Not mentioning certain aspects of sexism doesn't mean you deny they exist or that you belittle their existence. It just means that they weren't necessarily relevant to the point you were making. It's not your fault if some people can't figure that out on their own.
ASKaPHYSICIST 6 months ago 6
@ASKaPHYSICIST Yeah... it's still annoying though. -_-
healthyaddict 6 months ago
@healthyaddict Don't let it get you down. You can never make everybody happy.
Well, it is a touchy subject for many so you'd expect a bit of a fuzz. Only makes it more courageous on your part to have made the video.
ASKaPHYSICIST 6 months ago
@healthyaddict I have a little mantra for situations like this, it's served me well and I'd like you to have it. When the bozon level is off the scale, simply take a deep breath and speak thus:
"If we kill all the idiots there's be no one left."
Actually that doesn't help much does it? Oh well, have it anyway.
leapoffaith20 5 months ago
@ASKaPHYSICIST Are you inept? She is apologising because her video was being perceived as sexist. Representing one aspect which is based on somebody's sex, and not representing one aspect which is based on the opposite sex, is the definition of sexism. Her video portrayed that women are the only party whom are negatively affected by sexism. It is sexist for both men and women equally when a man is expected to pay for a woman's meals. Just different types.
BeeEmmCee1 6 months ago
@BeeEmmCee1 no and you're wrong. Her video was about explaining the concept of benevolent sexism and what examples she uses is irrelevant. She could have made a video about cook books and just so happen to only give examples of female authors. Same principle and it's not sexist!
If I make a video about benevolent racism and only mention examples of benevolent racism towards white people doesn't mean I'm racist towards blacks, Hispanics, Asians and Eskimos. Go get a clue!
ASKaPHYSICIST 6 months ago
@ASKaPHYSICIST She defines hostile sexism as 'sexism where you put a woman down'. That is an incorrect definition, as hostile sexism is 'where you put someone down based on their sex'. People are complaining that she poorly represented what sexism is. If you made a video about racism and you defined racism as 'putting someone down because they're Hispanic' you would be just as moronic as healthyaddict. Sure it is ONE definition of racism, but specifying one race in your definition is RACIST.
BeeEmmCee1 6 months ago
@BeeEmmCee1 you're knit-picking, when every person with a functioning brain would have realised the point she was trying to make. When I say: "a fight is where you punch each other and a play fight is where you pretend to punch each other" you wouldn't complain about the fact that I failed to mention that you can also kick each other in a fight. You don't always have to state the OBVIOUS.
I guess she assumed you knew the definition of general sexism ... that was her only flaw.
ASKaPHYSICIST 6 months ago
@ASKaPHYSICIST No, that is not true at all. You're comparing apples to lemons. Her definition of the topic conflicts with the meaning of sexism. She is being sexist by omitting men in her definition. If I said to a group of African Americans that the definition of racism is when black people treat white people unfairly, how do you think they would react? Do you think they would just think to themselves 'He obviously just means any race, he just forgot to mention them'. No, they wouldn't.
BeeEmmCee1 6 months ago
@BeeEmmCee1 In a similar situation, where the context of the statement is obvious, why wouldn't they? I just did exactly that! Are you being a racist now?
ASKaPHYSICIST 6 months ago
@ASKaPHYSICIST Well okay, you're obviously delusional and you're no longer being rational in your argument. I'm done here. Let me know when you have the capability of acknowledging a point instead of conceding to childish fallacies. My point WASN'T that certain groups and stereotypes will react differently, but that it is the ONUS of the person making a statement or definition to either speak generally in phrase that accommodates most view points, or include each viewpoint specifically. Logic.
BeeEmmCee1 6 months ago
@BeeEmmCee1 @BeeEmmCee1 You're obviously not fit to watch videos that require you to think and appreciate context as opposed to making everything simple and obvious for you. Why don't you go back to watching Sesame street and leave us to our preferred choice of media.
ASKaPHYSICIST 6 months ago
@ASKaPHYSICIST So this type of media is only for people who agree with it's messages! How silly of me thinking that I was allowed to have an opinion on something in a public place. I have not once argued that the context of her video was incorrect. I agree with what she's saying, I just don't think she presented it in a fair manner. You've sunk to a level of adolescence, with childish insults and an elitist view point, instead of acknowledging anything I said in my counter argument. Give up.
BeeEmmCee1 6 months ago
@BeeEmmCee1 childish insults? I think you should review some of your comments if you honestly think you have any right to accuse me.
ASKaPHYSICIST 6 months ago
I can actually think some really common examples of benevolent sexism towards men. For instance, women frequently buy men clothes (either their sons or husbands), to the point that the majority of men's underwear is bought by women. There are a huge number of men who are incapable of cooking anything that doesn't involve a barbecue, and large swaths of society seem to be under the impression that men are simply incapable of learning how to sort whites from colours in the wash.
Everstruggling 6 months ago 5
@Everstruggling Great example!
healthyaddict 6 months ago
@Everstruggling Those are some very old stereotypes. And having a woman buying you all your underwear could have a horrific outcome.For example i have some really traumatizing memories of my grandma buying me boxers with disney characters on them when i was a teen -_-
As for the cooking, may i remind you that most if not all well-known chefs are men. But anyhow, gender is not defined by the ability to do everyday choires.
joakeimmcgrath 5 months ago
@joakeimmcgrath I didn't comment on defining gender; I wrote about benevolent sexism towards men. Like it or not, it still happens. For most people Mom cooks the meals, not Dad. I know nearly every woman in this building because I do most of our laundry. I've met very few of the men, and the ones I have met are all single. When I shop for clothes I'm almost always outnumbered by women in the men's section. Of course there are exceptions. There are exceptions to everything.
Everstruggling 5 months ago
@Everstruggling Well, technically all those things you've mentioned have developed as a behavioral pattern while we were evolving from hunter-gatherer society into industrialized one. That's unless you're one of those of those religious northern americans who don't like the word "evolution".
But this pretty much more of a "habit" behavior than "prejudice" or "sexism". There's no actual assumption that men are incapable to do certain things.Just that they simply don't do them.
joakeimmcgrath 5 months ago
@joakeimmcgrath So... you think it is less sexist for a person to say, "I'll do the laundry because you either won't do it or won't do it right." Than to say, "I'll do the laundry because you incapable of doing it." Gotta say, I think they are both pretty damn sexist.
All sexism is, is a "habit" evaluating a person's rights, responsibilities or abilities based on their sex. It doesn't matter if it's because you think that they can't, won't or shouldn't do something.
Everstruggling 5 months ago
@Everstruggling Hmm, let's see..
My neighbors across the street are a married couple. The female around the size of an average grizzly bear.The male is a puny little guy with a hernia.
So one day i overheard the bear lady screaming "Would you move that goddamn closet already? I've just had my nails done. You're the man of the house, aren't you?"
Is that considered sexism in North America or not?
joakeimmcgrath 5 months ago
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@joakeimmcgrath Does that seem like an evaluation of a person's rights, responsibilities or abilities based on their sex? Seems pretty obvious to me.
And yes, you're not North American, I get it. Good job on that, you must be very proud of yourself.
Everstruggling 5 months ago
@Everstruggling Separating whites and colours in the wash is like ironing underwear; time consuming and unnecessary. I've been doing laundry for twenty years, not once ever have I separated them; it took my wife about three years before she noticed, and only because she saw me putting the load in the washer.
tml4873 2 months ago
@tml4873 It's funny, I was having this conversation with a friend of mine who agrees with you. He also, coincidentally, doesn't own any truly white t-shirts... at least compared to mine... at least not six months after he's bought them. Perhaps I'm just lucky my shirts tend to stay showroom white a year after I've bought them... or maybe it's because I separate them. I might be superstitious, but I'm going to keep separating them just to be on the safe side.
Everstruggling 2 months ago
Defining sexism as not treating people the same in all situations is useless. As long as you respect people have the same rights it is fine.
I generally aim to have sex with attractive women, I do not do this with men: I am sexist due to this by what you seem to imply.
Mathematically, a 'Continuum' of sexism is not smart.
Rating people out of 10 is stupid. People are Ugly, Hot, REALLY HOT, or 'MY EYES'
The problem is that a continuum implies 7.3435 > 7.3434.
In reality no one can judge that.
TupoyVolk 6 months ago
♪Everyone's a little bit pregnant; it's true♫... oh! Wait a minute!
jackdeath 6 months ago
You have beautiful tits...
ifbenruledtheworld 6 months ago
Saying that everyone is sexist is a very bold statement, and when dealing with humans, using absolutes is usually a red flag for a weak argument. I think it would be more accurate to say that many or most people are sexist, and at the same time some people act contrary to a society's culture and are gender neutral.
nathan98000 6 months ago
@nathan98000 I'm working in absolutes here for simplicity. As research presently stands, it shows that everyone is a bit sexist/ageist/racist etc. It all just falls along a continuum, and is not just black and white.
healthyaddict 6 months ago 5
@healthyaddict Please cite the research that shows EVERYONE is sexist. Thank you in advance.
AirplaneRider 6 months ago
@AirplaneRider
You're stating that there are people out there who do not ever—even unintentionally—do or say something sexist?
boroncarbide 6 months ago
@boroncarbide Yes I am. It is absurd to ascribe any particular behavior to every single person on the planet. That's one of the reasons I think femisim is akin to religion. They hold idiotic beliefs without evidence just because it feels right to them.
I've asked several times for the research on this ridiculous assertion and neither Ashley nor anyone else has been able to provide any data. But hey I respect your FAITH position.
AirplaneRider 6 months ago
@healthyaddict That kind of thinking gives credence to endless reforms to get rid of sexism racism ect, in an eternal war, its absurd. there is a point where sexism and racism are not significant. Where the cure is not worth the cost. Feminism is here because nobody acknowledges that point, when even opening up a door for a woman is sexism, we know that the feminist lust for bashing men will never be quenched.
ObserveReality 4 months ago
I confess, I am a bit sexist. I usually open the car door for women and do in general all the little things that are now considered to be sexist nowadays. Not because I do think women can not handle themselfes, but to show my appreciation. But nowadays I kinda feel lost and whatever I do is wrong. Open a door for a woman - your sexist. Don,t - your an asshole. It would be helpful if women would accept that equality should work for both sides instead of changing the rules every time it fits them.
Furzkampfbomber 6 months ago
@Furzkampfbomber Well most women are going to expect that sort of behavior, because it is so ingrained into our culture. I'm not asking one to change it (at this point of the series), however only to recognize that anytime one does an act for one only one sex and not for the other sex, it is a sexist act. Whether or not that sexist act is 'harmful' or 'wrong' is another question at large.
healthyaddict 6 months ago
@healthyaddict I see your point and, since I am aware of what I am doing here, completely agree with you. And I get why women don,t like men doing this. My only problem, like already said, is that modern men can get easily lost since women often (rightfully) emphasize that they can take care of things on their own - but only as long as it suits their book. One moment they want equality, next moment chivalry. Changing the rules like this can be kind of an agressive and sexist act itselft.
Furzkampfbomber 6 months ago
@healthyaddict Anyway, I am watching your channel for quite some time now and usually enjoy your view on things. And you seem to be a very confident and resourceful person, so may I ask...
What do you think when some guy opens the door for you or wants to hold the coat for you? Providing he seems to do so as an act of appreciation and not in a patronizing way?
Furzkampfbomber 6 months ago
@Furzkampfbomber Women are individuals, I don't think it's realistic to ask half the population to have the same opinion about something. Opening a door for a woman - fine. Making her wait in the car until you get out and open the door for her - sexist.
jgoemat 6 months ago
@jgoemat I really do not want to start a debate on principles here, just wanted to point out that life is not easy for men too sometimes. But just for the record - I don,t make anyone wait, I usually just open the door before whe gets INTO the car. xD
Furzkampfbomber 6 months ago
shutup i dont care what you think woman
jk =D
deadlycheezcake 6 months ago
LOL! I'm transgendered.. get hit going both ways... sometimes by myself. Walk a block in my shoes and gender becomes a meaningless concept. Funny when I'm a man in a dress how other men will hold the door for me. Much to be said about social conditioning. How many men today know that you lead a woman down the stairs and follow her up... so that if she falls you can catch her?
yokoshemp 6 months ago
I clicked "not like" because I thought there was no much content in that video. Otherwise, you are just the most awesome woman you ever were :)
mickmils 6 months ago
It's aggravating to watch you coddle some of the cry babies that posted. Does sexism go both ways? Yes. Is sexism against men as prevalent and damaging as it is against women? Fuck no. Are there instances of "reverse racism"? Sure. Does this mean we should coddle angry (and usually blatantly racist) white people who cry about reverse racism as though it's endemic and just as bad as the racism minorities experience? Of course not. That woud be *silly*. Everyone who complained needs to GROW UP.
Kaisah21 6 months ago
Poor silly girl, don't you know that tromping through poison ivy is the men's job? So don't worry your pretty little head and... and... oh damn. Guess your right.
To everyone saying that your not sexist/racist at all: In my experience this actually makes you more likely to do sexist/racist things unconsciously, because unlike me you're not watching yourself and analyzing your actions with that in mind. Why would you if you never do that?
RDHornsey 6 months ago
Maybe you came in contact with the White Hickory Tussock Moth Caterpillar?
ripporter 6 months ago
Ya still look beautiful with poison ivy XD
CrowmagnusFilms 6 months ago
I've reached a point in my life where I feel comfortable holding doors open for people based on proximity alone. Age, race or gender don't enter in to it.
I'm told that I carry concepts to extremes at times, though. Just last Tuesday, I held an elevator for a family of four. I was scolded by security for "letting a bunch of coons" into the building.
As it turns out, my sexism and racism education doesn't extent to different species. I think it's because racoons can't get credit cards.
Koliedrus 6 months ago
You are wrong about one thing: We're not all guilty of sexism, racism, etc. Sorry.
BENY0HAMA 6 months ago
@BENY0HAMA Research doesn't support that statement. Sorry.
healthyaddict 6 months ago
I'm really excited to see your next videos on this topic; I'm interested on hearing more about your research.
I'm sorry you got poison ivy all over yo'self D: I'd hug you but then I'd itch...
Oh, and don't mind the people freaking out all over you... this is a touchy/uncomfortable subject for some people... and when some people get uncomfortable they lash out in whatever way they can :)
Especially if they place a lot of value on being chivalrous... >_>
Subbed! =D
NicholasKreuz 6 months ago
I don't consider myself sexist. I consider myself a feminist.
hoverFrog 6 months ago
What about when women objectify themselves for emotional or physical gain? It that reverse benevolent sexism? Ash...maybe you were sleep-walking and hiked through some P-Ivy? : )
Thereminator101 6 months ago
It is, alright...
nemesis962074 6 months ago
"Everyone's a little bit racist" - that song is supposed to be a parody. It's not meant as a profound message that should be embraced.
interagreed 6 months ago
@interagreed - Yes and no. It is also meant to have people relax just a bit and realize that making racist assumptions maybe isn't the same level of racist as saying "all black people are criminals" or the like - and doesn't deserve the same level of hostility. It is also accurate and tested, everyone really is a little bit racist. What matters more is how you deal with that and whether you attempt to move beyond it.
Jaelra 6 months ago
@interagreed Well actually... research does support that everyone is a little bit sexist/ageist/racist/etc.
healthyaddict 6 months ago
Why is the title "Sexism is OK?"
j03y2fly 6 months ago
@j03y2fly - Because the topic at hand is: we all do it, and some of it we're not going to be able to help, so it's "okay"... but "okay" doesn't mean good, and "okay" doesn't mean not somewhat harmful, it sort of implies that it's something we have to learn to live with.
Maybe kind of like... getting little bumps and scratches is "okay", it's not fun, and it's not good, but it's not really all that bad either.
PurpleGhost 6 months ago
@j03y2fly Because I got the response from everyone that chivalry is ok, despite it being a form of sexism. Forgot to explain that. Sorry. :/
healthyaddict 6 months ago
@healthyaddict why can't a woman be chivalrous? there's nothing wrong with chivalry, but when it has to be only men that are assumed to be chivalrous is when i see something wrong.
j03y2fly 6 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
im not sexist or racist AT ALL, and yes I claim that with my reputation at hand. im glad you apologized about neglecting to clarify about sexism towards men in your previous video. I have resubscribed.
j03y2fly 6 months ago
@j03y2fly Well actually... that is pretty much impossible lol
Explicit racism/sexism? sure. Its totally possible to not harbor views that other genders or races are inferior, and to make bigoted comments. I have seen no reason in your vids/comments to think you have those.
However, those implicit, unconscious views that we DONT think about are outside of our control. They have done studies where non racist people take slightly longer to describe an african face picture as "smart" or "kind"
squirrelywrath2 6 months ago
@j03y2fly I would say the best example that I have would be of my friend josh (totally nice guy, thoughtful, smart, articulate, actually in broadcasting at a native canadian television station [despite being white-scottish])
one time a native guy walked up to him downtown and asked him what time it was, and he replied "im sorry I dont have any change", and then INSTANTLY felt horrible and apologized about a million times.
squirrelywrath2 6 months ago
@squirrelywrath2 but thats hurtful and Really sexist. ive never done such a thing. moreover, is it sexist when someone asks you what ethnic background do you believe this person is based on their name, and you accumulate everyone you'd ever known with that name and come to the conclusion that the odds of that person having that name is that ethnicity?
j03y2fly 6 months ago
Comment removed
j03y2fly 6 months ago
I can't believe she condones rape!!
happyninslave 6 months ago
@happyninslave - Did you read, that extremist feminists post on redit, too? XD
PurpleGhost 6 months ago
@PurpleGhost People who condone rape are sick. Just because she is a female who votes Democrat dosn't make it right. You people are sick.... Rape is alway wrong!!
happyninslave 6 months ago
@happyninslave Oooorrrr not....?
You think she's condoning rape, or saying rape isn't wrong?
What video did YOU watch? Because, that's not what I saw.
PurpleGhost 6 months ago 2
Good clarification. Sometimes I feel like the most sexist woman in all of womandom...? womanham...? womenberg...?
Fiteworthy 6 months ago
I think a lot of men are overeacting about this; rather than try to have a discussion, many are just levelling a charge of sexism.
Just because sexism against men wasn't discussed doesn't entail an ignorance or endorsement of it. The sheer majority of sexism still occurs against women, and that's why it is still most discussed. Sexism against men should be discussed, but at the moment the attitudes of the proponants of such a discussion are in-fact slowly destroying their own chance.
niriop 6 months ago
I'm saddened that Ashley continues to espouse the myth that everyone is sexist. Using a cute song sadly proves nothing and is the sort of tactic that one with no evidence resorts to. I'm starting to believe based on the evidence of the last few videos that Ashley has switched off reason where her involvement in the cult of feminism is concerned. Very disappointing.
Just because someone is an atheist does not mean they are always rational.
AirplaneRider 6 months ago
@AirplaneRider Hun I'm not talking about feminism here. I'm talking about well-studied psychological research on sexism. Feminism is a different topic.
Would I identify as feminist? Yes, and sure there are some circles that overlap here, but sexism by definition does not equal feminism.
healthyaddict 6 months ago
@AirplaneRider I don't think it's a hige reach of healthyaddict to draw thie conclusion that everyone is sexist. We live in a world that treat's people based on inaccurate gender stereotypes. Because we are socialised as children in this society, we are unable to avoid adopting some of these habits. We can through conscious practice recognise and then eliminate sexism from our vocabulary and thought, but it's a process. I know very few people who have succeeded at this 100%.
pitdroidtech 6 months ago
@AirplaneRider People make the same statement about rascism. Everyone is a rascist they say.
connerjd 6 months ago
..Opening doors etc is done by men as a strategy to acquire sex; they're not being benevolent.
xy11xy 6 months ago
@xy11xy And when I open it for a man, or a child or an elderly person? Sometimes people are just polite.
no2religions 6 months ago 2
@no2religions
You're hoping a woman sees you and thinks you'll make a good mate.
xy11xy 6 months ago
@xy11xy So I open the door in the hopes that the man or child or elderly person will want to mate with me?
no2religions 6 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
@no2religions
I repeat:
You're hoping a woman sees you and thinks you'll make a good mate.
xy11xy 6 months ago
Sexism is not feelings. Sexism is institutionalized detrimental action.
xy11xy 6 months ago
I talk a bit about this in my most recent video. A lot of this stems from the Protestant Christian belief instilled in our country. Women used to stopped existing once married, lost all properties or trusts, and were not allowed certain things (and still today with the draft) because they were viewed as belonging in the home while the husband worked (derives from Genesis 3:16). Maybe I'll do a follow up as a video response to this :D
aposticism 6 months ago
You could probably try drawing some kind of comparison between benevolent sexism and spoiling children.
Nobody has any kind of problem with the idea that giving everything to kids, and never challenging them, produces people with no character, or faith in their own agency. Look at Paris Hilton, she got all kinds of perks, did it make her a better person?
Sometimes people need kindness, and sometimes they need to see themselves overcome failure and rejection, and be ok with it.
squirrelywrath2 6 months ago
You are one of the hottest women on Youtube!
:)
KalimaShaktide 6 months ago
ohhhhh good call with the contacts lol. I might not have thought of that
squirrelywrath2 6 months ago
Example of benevolent sexism towards men?
I used to work in an office where I was the only male.
One day I had my head down working when I was suddenly jerked back into the room when I overheard my female colleagues discussing the fact that they never let their husbands/boyfriends hang washing on a line.
One of them said "Men just can't do that".
So I looked up and said "Do you think there is a gene for it?"
kandtell 6 months ago
It's funny, I hold doors for anyone behind me and if they are close behind me I'll often allow them to go in first after I've opened the door. Male or female doesn't matter. I find it rather insulting when I occasionally get dirty looks from women for doing something I think is just polite especially since I'm not singling them out for the behavior. Most people seem to appreciate it and I've had a lot of other men and women do the same for me so I know I'm not the only one.
TcpProtocol 6 months ago
love the Avenue Q reference :) <3
zeevilmsellie 6 months ago
There's nothing wrong with taking your girlfriend out for dinner. It's what you do when you're courting. It is all part of the natural reproductive process. And if you're a girl... there's nothing wrong with taking your boyfriend out for dinner either :p
CuriousMoth 6 months ago
Get a cortisone shot and scrub with denatured mineral spirits while under continuously running water. Plant oils can stay on clothing for up to 3 years so, wash the contaminated articles with denatured mineral spirits as well.
Heylel444 6 months ago
I'm very sexist :) I don't mate with males, oh well.
Stonegoal 6 months ago
Dear sociologists, please look up sexual dimorphism. Then look up sexual selection. You can blame your ancestors for this. It is not merely social convention that causes sexism.
BrickInTheWall1 6 months ago
When I was six, being babysat in a local babysitter program, where you'd have maybe 30 kids and a few babysitters. I remember the babysitters being sexist against the boys. They had simple bathrooms, just a toilet and sink. If a girl was in the bathroom the door was shut but if a boy was using the bathroom the babysitters wouldn't allow us to shut the door. Also on hot days when they would bring out the plastic pools outside they would force the boys to change outside in the open.
AgentGhost 6 months ago
@AgentGhost
Even if the bathrooms were free they wouldn't allow us to use them. To this day I don't know if any of them were charged with sexual abuse (probably not). But to this day I haven't forgotten their faces, if I ever bump into one of them they will get a nice punch in the mouth. I always laugh when people think girls are more victimized than boys, think about that when most babysitters are woman, which gender do you think gets it worse?
AgentGhost 6 months ago
sexism is only a creation of humans because we humans like to create things out of nothing.
guitaristman23 6 months ago
Personally, I think you look better in glasses... then again I've always been into nerds.
Jonstern1983 6 months ago
@PseudoPoiesis first of all you have to understand that being a man and woman is not being the same girls play with barbie dolls when they are kids whereas boys dont women like pink usually men choose another color women dress differently than men they wear skirts lingerie etc men dont hence that also leads us to another logical conclusion that men and women have different perceptions relating to colors dress toys and many other things . proving what i said before,they think different socially
farazazhar1 6 months ago
@farazazhar1 The colour pink has only been associated with femininity for about 80-90 years or so. Historically, pink was a boy's colour because it represented passion and virility, while blue was often a girl's colour, because it represented demure obeisance and was associated with the Virgin Mary.
falseprophecy 6 months ago
Sexism applies to only women and prepubescent boys.
CaptainWheel 6 months ago
How did you get the poison ivy ash?
pbrskater26 6 months ago
@pbrskater26 No clue.
healthyaddict 6 months ago
@healthyaddict um.. then how do you know it's not some kind of food allergy? :)
no2religions 6 months ago
Assuming a man holds open a door for a woman or chooses to pay for her meal is caused by sexism instead of kindness or decency is in itself sexist.
FamilyGuyRS 6 months ago
@FamilyGuyRS These acts, usually lumped under "chivalry", have their foundations in a sexist culture:putting women on pedestals, assuming women shouldn't engage in physical exertion, assuming every woman (or at least every attractive woman) is a delicate flower, assuming women are incapable of earning their own money (which comes with the implication their affection can be bought). It's not the act that is sexist, it's the culture that normalized the reasons that is.
falseprophecy 6 months ago 2
Better stop touching your chest with those poison ivy hands because those swellings are getting pretty ... OK, I'll just leave it there. Your swellings are getting pretty. See? That's sexist. If you were a man I would say something like - those swellings are getting strong and brave.
fluffymcdeath 6 months ago
I love that Avenue Q song, lol. It IS true.
bttsstewart 6 months ago
Sexism exists because women & men have fundamental differences & most people are too STUPID to compensate. A certain combination of time & awareness are the only cures. Believe it!
BorrahAlive 6 months ago
@BorrahAlive Naruto? Is that you?
Otokogoroshi 6 months ago
@Otokogoroshi that's the most insulted I've ever been! lol jk jk
BorrahAlive 6 months ago
Here's one thing that bugs me as a man.
After years of condescending to women, advertisers realized that women were involved in 70% of spending decisions, so they stopped....but NOW, they almost NEVER have the women in the commercial the bad/weak/stupid person...every woman is brilliant an ethereal, and every man is a freakin' idiot.
I can't believe this kind of blatant pandering ACTUALLY appeals to women, it's just that advertisers are still just as stupid as before.
SiriusMined 6 months ago
@SiriusMined Very true!
However, they've also shifted the pressure onto women to now be some kind of superwoman, or consider themselves a failure. But don't worry, because Product X will make you that superwoman!!!!
Isn't that what advertising is about, though? Selling unrealistic expectations, and creating new ones?
aido92 6 months ago
@SiriusMined I don't think it appeals to women. I don't have a proper sample size but I know it pisses me the ever loving hell off. Actually there are plenty of cases where the woman is an idiot, but she's often more 'oblivious' than actively stupid. Its easier to notice wrongs against oneself personally than wrongs against people who are different. Its usually best to step outside ones shoes and look at something from all angles. I often find that things are sexist towards both sides.
Otokogoroshi 6 months ago