I'd come up with a funny comment, but its dinner time...let's see...what to eat..Here we go...Pizza puff for an appetizer, rib tip/hot wing/hot link combo, with a slice of white bread and french fries on the side for main course, and since I had a rough day at work...A whole cheesecake...did I forget any food group here?
"Whole grain breads like whole wheat and rye are especially good for you"
"If you're not adverse to 'ethnic' foods"
Funny....but I've learned to prefer whole and multigrain breads. I think the last sandwich I had on white read was at my mother's. And I even got her to buy whole wheat bread (telling her that if it just says "wheat bread" that is only white bread with molasses added).
"-and healthy dumps" LMAO Its funny but its also true, most of the foods (most espically those full of grain and fiber) are just important to clean out your excremental system and keep it running properly.
@Jcolinsol Iam sure they called it something else back then. Doesnt matter what the food had or does have apparently back in the old days Gluttony was encouraged.
@Jcolinsol Its what you eat right? I just cant stand the idea that to be perfect by someone else's standards you gotta weight this much and do this and that.
Yeah. Its bad for your liver. But it can't account for every single fat ass in the world. Personal responsibility does have to come into play at some point. Even the effects of genetically pervert-- sorry MODIFIED foods can be countered if you get the necessary nutrients and exercise.
How about not using insulting terms like "fatass". I know plenty of fat people who eat a healthy diet and are fat. It's not anyone's "personal responsibility" to have a body type of which you approve, ya little nazi ya.
Basically, it makes you look like you don't know what you're talking about.
Thank you for adding absolutely nothing to the argument and calling me a nazi. It really helps spread the information.
I was being sarcastic in case you couldn't tell. I am aware of thyroid disorders, eating disorders, and genetic dispositions. I'm also aware that far too many people just follow whatever dumbass excuse they see on TV and never take responsibility for their actions. Blame corn syrup! Blame McDonalds! Blame the Commies!
0:07 - The five finger puppets of death! 0:55 - Narration by Floyd the Barber. 1:55 - Yeah, "Uncle Ted" is coming over, if you know what I mean. 2:40 - "I thought I was Dale." 4:11 - If you're a baby cow that is. 5:13 - Good at building essential arterial plaque. 5:17 - Or swallowed raw as a part of your fraternity hazing. 5:35 - The Pevensies!? 5:37 - Like ketchup or martini olives. 5:59 - of Wendys!? 6:26 - ...at making you fart! 6:36 - Roar? 7:44 - And ice cream. 8:22 - And to KILL BILL.
Since when is "bread and butter" a food group? Bread is a grain, butter would be dairy, and margarine would be...um....I dunno, petroleum products, maybe?
Man, that was great, I lol'd heartily. Jalepeno poppers FTW, I could eat those things all day. This also reminded me of back when I was in fourth grade (1988) and I used the word "pep" and my best friend was like "There's no such word as pep!" Would that I could have shown her the original version of this short back then.
love that rutabaga comment...man, that meat sure needs a chainsaw to cut it (I was waiting for your crack on that one-but alas....no....) :( crazy as usual!!!!!
Man, I want to live in the 50s now. You could eat all that butter and meat without feeling guilty. XD Does this short remind anyone of the movie Sleeper?
I read an interesting book called "change your underwear twice a week: lessons from the golden age of classroom filmstrips" where it analyzed the old filmstrips and discussed the lessons in it and the frame of mind of the country when it was made.
in one that was much like this short, the author said we started being encouraged to drink milk after the government began supporting the dairy industry, and it really isn't as necessary for good health as these films would have you think.
SenseOrSensibility: Considering most of the planet cannot eat dairy products--because of allergies or lactose intolerance--I'd say it's pretty unnecessary.
I'm 28 and I've never consumed dairy--I just make sure to get different kinds of beans and legumes, plus plenty of leafy greens.
you are so much better off if you haven't because cow's milk isn't good for the human body anyway...the dairy industry and the beef industry and the food industry in general are such liars...don't get me started-people have been brainwashed into eating things that cause much disease, but it is mostly about greed anyway... take care and keep eating the healthy way you do! :)
I love how kids in these shorts always seem to realize on their own the right thing to do. Who needs teachers and parents? And doesn't Mom know about Ralph's 4-candybar-a-day habit?
@sandydeath56 That I don't understand...Stephen Hawking can't walk or speak, but his mind is sharp as a tack (communicating through a computer with voice synthesizer)--that is the opposite of being a "vegetable" in the human sense"
No kidding, I mean watch it again he's really trying to dig into that potato..how hard is it to make a baked potato that doesn't require a lever system to get into. And that steak..that kid is sawing away, if your steak needs a bansaw to cut into you've failed :)
"Drink milk everytime you smoke for optimum health!" XD
OonaCanute 1 month ago
I'd come up with a funny comment, but its dinner time...let's see...what to eat..Here we go...Pizza puff for an appetizer, rib tip/hot wing/hot link combo, with a slice of white bread and french fries on the side for main course, and since I had a rough day at work...A whole cheesecake...did I forget any food group here?
DGF2099 1 month ago
lol, I am watching this while eating cookies....Oh the irony! XD
sillygrl23 2 months ago
Is Ralph wearing lipstick?
hershbep 2 months ago in playlist More videos from romeorhino
"Strain them through a damn panty for all I care"
tomservo56954 2 months ago
"Whole grain breads like whole wheat and rye are especially good for you"
"If you're not adverse to 'ethnic' foods"
Funny....but I've learned to prefer whole and multigrain breads. I think the last sandwich I had on white read was at my mother's. And I even got her to buy whole wheat bread (telling her that if it just says "wheat bread" that is only white bread with molasses added).
tomservo56954 3 months ago
I could swear that at the end the narrator says "Buy Communist foods."
Oppeldeldoc1 3 months ago
Pretty-ish. Ouch!
JohnnyCxviii 5 months ago
"-and healthy dumps" LMAO Its funny but its also true, most of the foods (most espically those full of grain and fiber) are just important to clean out your excremental system and keep it running properly.
sillygrl23 6 months ago
Notice how the finger pointing to meat and eggs is the middle one. Fuck you Peta!
DirtieLaundry 6 months ago
You mean bacon's not a vitamen?!
VtheHAPPYLURKER 7 months ago in playlist MST3K Short List
The hand has a severe form of hitchhiker's thumb.
HaileyVerge 1 year ago
2:33, you sounded JUST like Kevin.
pdlbean 1 year ago
and beef
daken000 1 year ago
beef
daken000 1 year ago
We wonder nowadays why kids are so fat..parents back in the day stuffed kids till they popped and that was supposedly healthy?
Newtwist75 1 year ago
@Newtwist75
Three words for you: "high fructose corn syrup"
Jcolinsol 1 year ago
@Jcolinsol
...shit
Jcolinsol 1 year ago
@Jcolinsol Iam sure they called it something else back then. Doesnt matter what the food had or does have apparently back in the old days Gluttony was encouraged.
Newtwist75 1 year ago
@Newtwist75
Actually, I consider the idea that over-eating relates to weight, and that weight relates to health, to be a primitive fallacy.
Jcolinsol 1 year ago
@Jcolinsol Its what you eat right? I just cant stand the idea that to be perfect by someone else's standards you gotta weight this much and do this and that.
I see your point though.
Newtwist75 1 year ago
@Jcolinsol
Yeah. Its bad for your liver. But it can't account for every single fat ass in the world. Personal responsibility does have to come into play at some point. Even the effects of genetically pervert-- sorry MODIFIED foods can be countered if you get the necessary nutrients and exercise.
FrostbittenWolf 1 year ago
@FrostbittenWolf
How about not using insulting terms like "fatass". I know plenty of fat people who eat a healthy diet and are fat. It's not anyone's "personal responsibility" to have a body type of which you approve, ya little nazi ya.
Basically, it makes you look like you don't know what you're talking about.
Jcolinsol 1 year ago
@Jcolinsol
Thank you for adding absolutely nothing to the argument and calling me a nazi. It really helps spread the information.
I was being sarcastic in case you couldn't tell. I am aware of thyroid disorders, eating disorders, and genetic dispositions. I'm also aware that far too many people just follow whatever dumbass excuse they see on TV and never take responsibility for their actions. Blame corn syrup! Blame McDonalds! Blame the Commies!
FrostbittenWolf 1 year ago
@FrostbittenWolf
I blame YOO!
Jcolinsol 1 year ago
@Jcolinsol That's FOUR words...
tomservo56954 1 month ago
@tomservo56954
I knew someone would point it out eventually.
Jcolinsol 1 month ago
TomMSTie 1 year ago
Since when is "bread and butter" a food group? Bread is a grain, butter would be dairy, and margarine would be...um....I dunno, petroleum products, maybe?
ElveeKaye 1 year ago
Man, that was great, I lol'd heartily. Jalepeno poppers FTW, I could eat those things all day. This also reminded me of back when I was in fourth grade (1988) and I used the word "pep" and my best friend was like "There's no such word as pep!" Would that I could have shown her the original version of this short back then.
MysticalChicken 1 year ago
These make me laugh so hard my eyes water and it makes me sneeze.
Perhaps I should have more thumb foods to to ward off that sneeze!
HGbunny 1 year ago
"And only one to get sent to the principal." LOL
Mikeymcguy 2 years ago 9
Where are the Buttertons with their sticks of butter on everything.
Dad in the study with his martini ...or 10!
Newtwist75 2 years ago
Does anyone else think this short is quite... cheesy?
DrGregoryHouseIT 2 years ago 3
The kids sound smashed out of their heads...maybe they got into daddy's little cocktail stash.
Newtwist75 2 years ago 2
@Newtwist75 Dad is REALLY fond of the Booze Group.
ElveeKaye 1 year ago
@DrGregoryHouseIT absolutely!
peskylisa 1 year ago
love that rutabaga comment...man, that meat sure needs a chainsaw to cut it (I was waiting for your crack on that one-but alas....no....) :( crazy as usual!!!!!
kittenrenea 2 years ago
"if good food is not available try Olive Garden"
"and pray tell how does one gage one's level of pep?"
"Fried dough, deep fried calzone, fried egg bacon burger, frazzled onions, strawberry poptart"
"which helps bulid red blood and strong muscles...which you'll need to fight all the wars"
"Ralph noticed that a small change had taken place...his family was recast"
This was great, man! You're a natural! You need to join Rifftrax!!
purpleshamrock17 2 years ago 4
He already has.
MSkull01 2 years ago
PEP, PEP, PEP...Was SOOO Important to maintain a HIGH level of PEP back then! LOL!
45gunner 2 years ago
"RALPH get your ASS down here sohelpmegod!"
"ew, TMI."
I like the 'bread and butter' category! Whatever happened to THAT one? :D
ShadesofScorpius 2 years ago 5
Comment removed
blugreen123 2 years ago
Food tasted better back then I bet. Cuz they didn't put all that additive junk in it back then.
Sheri451 2 years ago 2
But where would we be without HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP!
Trust me, artificial sweeteners make everything better. So what if it slowly kills you and makes you sexually incompetent?
StevePinto3 2 years ago 2
"There are lots of important vegetables"
"Like Steven Hawking"
I laughed so hard and felt bad later XP
MikuMech 2 years ago 23
"And only one to get sent to the principal's office."
needles1987 2 years ago 6
Gawd, you gotta join RiffTrax, or Cinematic Titanic, or sumthin'. Your hilarious beyond all hell XD
ElvenApparition 2 years ago 2
Man, I want to live in the 50s now. You could eat all that butter and meat without feeling guilty. XD Does this short remind anyone of the movie Sleeper?
Damaris1034 2 years ago
haha. if you're not tom arnold.
RetroPengo 2 years ago
"Eating had become fun" - yeah, because it was such a _chore_ before, with all the candy and sweets...
Great video, very funny!
Pontifex 2 years ago 3
"To Wendy's!"
DarkMario2 2 years ago
I kept hearing "points to hell" instead of "heath"...
"Stephen Hawking" lmao
"and only one to get sent to the principal's office" XD
badluckshadow13 2 years ago
they mention butter or margarine with every food group
wonderboy62585 2 years ago
To think, this was once great advice. "Husky" was the term for the fat kid.
Roth314 2 years ago
"Eat for health"
Drink for fun!
His family was recast!
DrGregoryHouseIT 2 years ago
"Stephen Hawking" LOL!!!
Nice job, I laughed out loud.
adpdesign 3 years ago
"Milk is about the most perfect food there is!"
Which is why we STOP drinking human breastmilk as infants, and then start up on the breastmilk of another species. It makes perfect sense!
OonaCanute 3 years ago 4
I keep hearing that milk has so much fat in it, but I still drink it whenever I can. I just want the truth--is milk REALLY that good for you or not?
SenseOrSensibility 2 years ago
I read an interesting book called "change your underwear twice a week: lessons from the golden age of classroom filmstrips" where it analyzed the old filmstrips and discussed the lessons in it and the frame of mind of the country when it was made.
in one that was much like this short, the author said we started being encouraged to drink milk after the government began supporting the dairy industry, and it really isn't as necessary for good health as these films would have you think.
carolkath 2 years ago 3
Oh, you mean I don't have to change my underwear twice a week?
TomSFox 2 years ago 2
That's what the underwear lobbyists would have you believe!
pezdrake 2 years ago 3
Comment removed
pezdrake 2 years ago
Comment removed
blugreen123 2 years ago
you should, if you like these old educational films. I found it fascinating, and my parents found it nostalgic.
carolkath 2 years ago
So, milk DOESN'T do a body good?
'Twas just a lie from the dairy farms of America?
Damn. I'll never shed these pounds!
c3section 2 years ago
SenseOrSensibility: Considering most of the planet cannot eat dairy products--because of allergies or lactose intolerance--I'd say it's pretty unnecessary.
I'm 28 and I've never consumed dairy--I just make sure to get different kinds of beans and legumes, plus plenty of leafy greens.
OonaCanute 2 years ago
you are so much better off if you haven't because cow's milk isn't good for the human body anyway...the dairy industry and the beef industry and the food industry in general are such liars...don't get me started-people have been brainwashed into eating things that cause much disease, but it is mostly about greed anyway... take care and keep eating the healthy way you do! :)
kittenrenea 2 years ago
@kittenrenea if we can't eat meat or diary what are we supposed to eat?
They are both essential for a balanced diet, stop reading conspiracry theories.
qwertasdcfghjklmo24z 10 months ago
@OonaCanute
Congrats....now get back to your leafs while i enjoy my cheese filled calzone.
Timewap 1 year ago
@Timewap The world is a depressing place when we can't even watch something absurd and fun without getting lectures crammed down our throats.
electrogeek77 1 year ago
Comment removed
flitterella 2 years ago
Ralph is now in his 60's and is taking Zocor.
A quart of whole milk a day . . . dear god . . .
mamakash 3 years ago 2
Wow, the kid who played Ralph was horrible in this, haha.
EarthboundX 3 years ago
"Chicken and other poultry...like beef, for example."
Reminds me of those bull/chicken chimeras in Dragon Warrior IV. :)
Kahran042 3 years ago
Cheese and butter used to be good for you?
needles1987 3 years ago
This was before trans fats were invented. :P
9AtNight 3 years ago 3
Wow what a bunch of whistle-blowing kids
FinalGamerJames 3 years ago
"Ralph, get your ass down here now or so help me God!" LOL
utenatenjo80 3 years ago 6
He's tired on Saturday? No Shinola! EVERYONE is tired on Saturday!
dfirest1 3 years ago 4
I love how kids in these shorts always seem to realize on their own the right thing to do. Who needs teachers and parents? And doesn't Mom know about Ralph's 4-candybar-a-day habit?
smartbunny 3 years ago 6
Another great 'Fun With Shorts'.
Spazman173 3 years ago
"It's a really small class."
Aw, meanest joke ever!
TomSFox 3 years ago 4
I think she's beautiful. : /
flitterella 2 years ago
That's okay, I'm not judging you.
TomSFox 2 years ago
This kid is a dummy. Just say you're allergic. I use it all the time.
Another great post!
insanedemonspaz 3 years ago
Brought to you by the Center for Science in the Public Interest...they know what's best for you whether you like it or not!
alwrig 3 years ago 2
Wow, you sure are churning them out, now!
TomSFox 3 years ago
"For it takes five fingers to point the way to healthful eating habits - and only one to get sent to the principal's office"
bas1010 3 years ago 4
TMI = Three Mile Island?
bas1010 3 years ago
Too much information.
Spazman173 3 years ago
@bas1010 Too Much Information
tomservo56954 1 month ago
WTF! Eating healthier = having more friends?! Way to go, 1950s logic!
ladynovembre 3 years ago 3
Hehe you're wonderful!
VRMorrigon 3 years ago 2
This prequel to 'Band of the Hand' is just odd.
Thanks Josh, funny stuff.
taigakirdape 3 years ago
It's weird that they put butter with bread instead of in with the dairy stuff where it belongs...
And I'm with blugreen123, that potato looked heinous.
Great work, Josh! Your riffing is full of pep!
FEnM 3 years ago 2
Manos: The Hand of Health!
Megatenist 3 years ago 27
There is no better way to describe such an atrocity.
Sushibuttons 3 years ago 3
Oh man, that's genius!
TomSFox 3 years ago
Haha, good one.
OWfan 3 years ago
you are the best josh!you rock!!!!!!!!
shihtzusrool 3 years ago
wait a second? Did those kids just refer to the movie they're in?
snakes3425 3 years ago
Stephen Hawking, now that's in bad taste. but funny!
sandydeath56 3 years ago 3
@sandydeath56 That I don't understand...Stephen Hawking can't walk or speak, but his mind is sharp as a tack (communicating through a computer with voice synthesizer)--that is the opposite of being a "vegetable" in the human sense"
tomservo56954 3 months ago
Must of been nice to live in an age where eating that healthy didn't cost so much!
Woad25 3 years ago 2
"makes sure it's enriched" now nutritionists beg people not to eat enriched breads. Funny!
"strain it thru a damn panty", is that what
he said?! LOL
"rutabaga fiea cracka sis boom bah!"
"and a healthy dump" GREAT job, Josh!
"how does one gauge one's level of pep?" why don't they just call it "energy" like everyone else?
"food, it's what's for dinner"
that poor kid, being named "Ralph"
"those inferior Brazilians" haha
blugreen123 3 years ago 4
-when were there 5 food groups?
-When was bread & butter a food group?
-"15 year old third graders!"
-I'm hungry, I'll finish this later.
dfirest1 3 years ago 5
didn't that baked potato at the dinner scene in the beginning look awful? ;)
blugreen123 3 years ago 2
Have you ever seen a baked potato in a black and white movie that even remotely looks good?
dfirest1 3 years ago
no, but that one was particularly gnarly looking :)
blugreen123 3 years ago
No kidding, I mean watch it again he's really trying to dig into that potato..how hard is it to make a baked potato that doesn't require a lever system to get into. And that steak..that kid is sawing away, if your steak needs a bansaw to cut into you've failed :)
Woad25 3 years ago 7
haha!
blugreen123 3 years ago
Maybe they were eating cafeteria food?
dfirest1 3 years ago
Yeah, the kid didn't spoil his dinner by eating one measly candy bar, he just can't eat the woman's cooking...
fdragon010 3 years ago 2
I work in a grocery store, and I've seen gnarlier things, trust me!
dfirest1 3 years ago
It looked raw, no? Like they just took a potato nad sliced it open, hoping it would magically bake itself
ResettisReplicas 2 years ago
Lol, 15 year old 3rd graders,
Josh, you've done it again
ChaosApprentice 3 years ago 3
"Spanky orders the hit on Froggie!" --Luv it! Your videos/commentaries are consistently entertaining...Thanks!
6celery8 3 years ago 3