Goon Hand: (guu nah haan dah) adverb 1. The process in which a firm grip on the underarm of a female is used to avert an embarrassing social situation 2. The action or process of female behavioral correction originated by the Mediterranean peoples from Rome to Carthage.
Sentence: She called my friend a cocksucker at his birthday so I gave the Goon Hand. see: Pimp Slap and Mushed.
Famous author John Updike was once asked how he writes women so well. His response: "I think of a man. Then I take away reason and accountability." Best description of women I've ever heard. It's even worse now that they can hit us but god forbid we hit them.
The public scene...ahh my ex and I used to seesaw about that.
She'd be ready to go and I'd snarl "We are NOT doing this here. We can do this in the car. We can do this at home. But so help me God if we do this here."
A couple of times she stalked off and stormed around the mall and I just sat on a bench, dumbfounded, watching happy people eat ice cream until she came back.
I've served my time on the bench too. I so related to the comment "watching happy people eat ice cream" LOL! I've sat there and wondered...we got up, we got dressed, we came to the mall, we bought pillow cases and then I don't know what the hell happened.
I wish I had a nickel for every time I snarled through my teeth "So help me God etc etc etc"
Lol, Geez I thought I was the only one who experienced this. And women wonder why (except for sex) we want nothing to do with them. I'm married now and my woman does this shit constantly. We are at the end now and I know what Ant means. I will NEVER get married again and I always warn any guy I meet who stupidly gets conned into this to talk to other married guys first!!!
Nothin' like the goon hand to keep someone in check! My mom used to give me the goon hand when I was a kid in the cereal aisle. "I want Count Chocula!" /mom gives the goon hand "No! It's unhealthy and expensive!"
The goon hand is a nice behavioral tool given to mankind by the Italians and the blacks. I believe the spanish may have had a form of the goon hand (el mano goono) that was passed on to the Mexicans as well.
Goon Hand: (guu nah haan dah) adverb 1. The process in which a firm grip on the underarm of a female is used to avert an embarrassing social situation 2. The action or process of female behavioral correction originated by the Mediterranean peoples from Rome to Carthage.
Sentence: She called my friend a cocksucker at his birthday so I gave the Goon Hand. see: Pimp Slap and Mushed.
TheHuskyJesus 1 month ago
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Anthony had a great line at 6:44.
jadedmastermind 7 months ago
Comment removed
jadedmastermind 7 months ago
Famous author John Updike was once asked how he writes women so well. His response: "I think of a man. Then I take away reason and accountability." Best description of women I've ever heard. It's even worse now that they can hit us but god forbid we hit them.
jadedmastermind 7 months ago
@jadedmastermind Jack Nicholson's character in As Good As It Gets said that same line. Did Updike originally say it? Neat.
CoolerKing37 7 months ago
best goon hand ever: Robert De Niro in Jackie Brown...
atkm2891 1 year ago 3
@atkm2891 Louis... Looooouis.... Louis!
CommendatoreAndolini 9 months ago
Wow Kelly is an asshole
ReximFavor 1 year ago
"I'm not calming down, you calm down."
Classic stuff. I love it. It would be funnier except that I've been there.
OboxerU 1 year ago 2
Took all of his money after 45 years of busting his ass? That's when you start wondering to yourself "would prison really be that bad"?
indianajoe219 1 year ago 2
And I can't have sex with women I love!
OboxerU 1 year ago 2
You can't be rational with an irrational person.
indianajoe219 2 years ago 2
The public scene...ahh my ex and I used to seesaw about that.
She'd be ready to go and I'd snarl "We are NOT doing this here. We can do this in the car. We can do this at home. But so help me God if we do this here."
A couple of times she stalked off and stormed around the mall and I just sat on a bench, dumbfounded, watching happy people eat ice cream until she came back.
OboxerU 2 years ago 2
@OboxerU
I've served my time on the bench too. I so related to the comment "watching happy people eat ice cream" LOL! I've sat there and wondered...we got up, we got dressed, we came to the mall, we bought pillow cases and then I don't know what the hell happened.
I wish I had a nickel for every time I snarled through my teeth "So help me God etc etc etc"
LeerGroup 2 years ago 5
@LeerGroup
Yes, exactly!
I would go through the timeline of events, too, wondering how the hell her wanting a new jacket resulted in this horrible nightmare of an afternoon.
OboxerU 2 years ago
Lol, Geez I thought I was the only one who experienced this. And women wonder why (except for sex) we want nothing to do with them. I'm married now and my woman does this shit constantly. We are at the end now and I know what Ant means. I will NEVER get married again and I always warn any guy I meet who stupidly gets conned into this to talk to other married guys first!!!
indianajoe219 2 years ago
@LeerGroup I so understand this. Women are just so fucked in the head anymore!!
indianajoe219 1 year ago 2
Fuck that shit, bitch woulda woken up in a woodchipper if she took my money
TheDrunkenCelt 2 years ago 21
Another amazing bit from O and A that I would have missed out on if it wasn't posted on youtube. Thanks!
coniccinoc 2 years ago 5
Nothin' like the goon hand to keep someone in check! My mom used to give me the goon hand when I was a kid in the cereal aisle. "I want Count Chocula!" /mom gives the goon hand "No! It's unhealthy and expensive!"
FunkJamez 2 years ago 5
not 45 years....
we all know that Anthony's forty-flerf lmao
MoPapparani 2 years ago 6
He's about 51 I rhink. He looked like hell on Hannity recently. But it's radio. He still looks 4 times better than Tom Leykis.
LAPunk1986 2 years ago 4
nope hes 48
staffarino 2 years ago
The goon hand is a nice behavioral tool given to mankind by the Italians and the blacks. I believe the spanish may have had a form of the goon hand (el mano goono) that was passed on to the Mexicans as well.
Tulkastaldo 2 years ago 33
lol I love the goon hand. all my uncles from Jersey do it.
XxSTICH666xX 2 years ago 6
Imagine getting the goon hand from formely fat Bowby's porkchop hand
hunghunk2006 2 years ago 10