PLEASE DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL GET KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BY THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. TOMORROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. HOWEVER IF YOU DONT POST THIS COMMENT TO AT LEAST 3 VIDEOS YOU WILL DIE WITHIN 2 DAYS. NOW UV STARTED READIN DIS DUNT STOP THIS IS SO SCARY. SEND THIS OVER TO 5 VIDEOS IN 143 MINUTES WHEN UR DONE PRESS F6 AND UR CRUSHES NAME WILL APPEAR ON THE SCREEN IN BIG LETTERS. THIS IS SO SCARY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY
Hi, I'm the passerby in the back hallway during load in. My job is to hold up the setup techs when I see them pushing cases to the ballroom by saying, "what, is there a Magic Show tonight"?
You are BRILLIANT!! I am a Show Producer from Los Angeles and I came from the rock & roll industry. I joined AVHQ in 1988 and have been in A/V since then. This is the most accurate depiction of the business I have EVER seen. This level of creative is OFF the chart. Please let me know if you do this for hire - I could think of many stories for clients we could do this for - absolutely brilliant.
Hi, I'm the account manager. I don't know what it is we're doing or how it gets done, but we're gonna make 42.5% on it. You folks just keep up the good work and do those all-nighters; I'll worry about details like taking the client on a Mediterranean cruise. Oh, yeah, overtime is authorized, but you can't charge for it. I'll see to it that you get an extra teeshirt.
I love the audio guy! I know a few of those types who will double compress an SM58 podium. One even told me that it was a common studio effect. I was like "BUT DUDE WE ARE NOT IN A STUDIO". And when an audio guy needs to spend two hours 'flattening' a room I just laugh. It is far easier to work with the room.
Yeah, I said it.
"How come you never hear an audio guy count to three?
Because they gotta lift on three."
:-)
//audio and video guy. not so much with the lighting though.
Hello, I am a security guard. I used to be in the military or on the police force. I have a little bit of power, so I'm going to do my very best to harass the backstage crew whenever they try to get in or out of the ballroom. If you don't have a ID badge, I won't let you in, even if you have an A/V companies' logo shirt. My memory is so short that I can't remember who you are from one day to the next. I will lock the ballroom down so there is only one door in and out, and I will sit there.
Hi...I'm The Creative Director. I've worked my way up the production ranks for over 20 years, providing services in videos, events and marketing initiatives. Now that I am a Creative Director, I waltz into projects with a half baked idea that sends everyone into a tizzy. Then I run off to another meeting leaving the team to figure out how to do what I suggested. Then the designers do whatever they want and it looks great, when I swoop back in at the end and take credit for the whole thing.
Hi, I'm the teleprompter op. After painstakingly reading some of the script all I can say is "Who wrote this brochure copy and is trying to past it off as a script". I think all corporate script writers suck, they have no imagination. This producer/client is a real piece of work... I bet if I stick a lump of coal up his ass this morning, I would have a shiny diamond by this afternoon.
Hi, I'm an IATSE stagehand. I need four people to do my job. Don't touch anything, even if it belongs to you, or I'll close down this show. Last week a producer yelled at me. So ya know what I did? I cut all the intercom lines right in the middle of the CEO's speech. Wanna snort some coke? Hey, break time. We'll sit around and talk after break. What's that? After 5? Man, I'm getting triple overtime.
Absolutely BRILLIANT. Obviously from someone that has experienced the egos associated with a corporate show. The lovely egos that failed in their original chosen career path.
"Those who can, do. Those who can't, do Corporate Theater".
Hi I'm the guy that just brought the expen$ive set to the crappy loading dock. even though I'm a highly skilled stagehand I drive the truck 'cause no one else can back the truck into the dock w out ripping the side open . I just had to fight w security and the teamsters to get into the building and unload, and fight over handling finish painted sets w filthy gloves and I'm in a really good mood now. I'd rather work as a video opp or go back to europe and race motorcycles
Hi, I'm the video director! I usually don't get brought in until the last moment and have to block out my shots because the producer doesn't have the budget to pay for camera ops during rehearsals. I'd like to get back into broadcast which is what I went to college for but I'd have to start all over as a PA so I'll be doing this until I am forced to retire because I can't do three jobs at once!
Hi, I'm the bad news guy who is here to tell everyone that due to economic turndowns, all gigantic corporate meeting events are permanently cancelled. Everyone is laid off, except for the dumb little blonde PA who has been sleeping with me.
Take your masters degrees and find meaningful careers in the fast-food industry, or worse, teach Production 101 in a college.
Hi, I'm the dumb ass person in the audience or from the company who will always come up to a video tech and ask ' can you get the game on that thing?' It can be a projector or a monitor, at any season; I am programmed to say game when ever I see video equipment.
“Hi. I’m the Art Director. I absolutely love wearing black skinny jeans and leaving my hair shaggy, and I revel in taking feedback on my designs and then returning new versions that are totally different, and yet in no way address the feedback I received.”
“Hi. I’m the AE. I make money off of other people’s work, and really love kissing client’s asses while rolling my eyes at everyone else. My hobbies include under the bus throwing, pretending that anything that went wrong has nothing to do with me overpromising and underbudgeting, wearing expensive suits and shirts with 2 buttons undone and walks on the beach.”
Hi. I’m the client executive that's always backstage, even though I’m not presenting and no one knows quite what I do. I like to hang around the crew food and wear a crew badge, and I like short sleeve button down shirts with thick ties. I also like to look over the audio guy’s shoulder and ask him how much the board costs. I make the crew guys feel uncomfortable for the first day, until they realize that I'm inconsequential and start pushing past me pretending to be doing something important.
"Hi. I'm the one hot chick that is a part of every load in crew. I like to wear tight jeans and black concert t-shirts, and the guys always send me up ladders so they can ogle my butt. I think that the fact that I keep my hair in two tight braids off the back of my head makes me less of a chick, and I clearly know what I am doing because I carry a really big leatherman."
"Hi. I'm a teleprompter op. When someone is talking on stage, I like to say "SHHHH!" and hold up one finger if anyone walks within 10 feet of me. But I also think it is OK to distract the graphics op with dumb stories and pictures of my kid/dog/neice/new 5th wheel whenever I damn well feel like it. I also like to complain that I have the most stressful job, but as soon as someone presents off script also like to complain that I have nothing to do."
"Hi. I'm a speech writer. I think that people actually listen to what I write. I also don’t know that once my speeches are taken onsite, they are completely changed in offlines until what is actually presented is a mishmash written by the producer and teleprompter op. Deep down, I still think I am going to release the great American novel someday."
"Hi. I'm the creative director. I'm convinced that none of these lowbrow A/V guys can understand my quiet genius, and love acting as though the client is just a hindrance to my earth shattering creative vision. I do... not realize that when the show ends, what I have done means literally nothing to anyone."
bamen dude so freakin sweet
Legitboss143 4 weeks ago
OMG! This really takes me back!!!
superdramaqueen21 7 months ago
Whooooooooooooooooooot! This is so freakin right on!
orlandobands 7 months ago
this is lame wtf is the point???
xxNATIONofTURFLAMxx 9 months ago
@xxNATIONofTURFLAMxx If you're in the biz it's amazing how spot on it is.
heresmokethis 8 months ago
what is the point of this
lolcourt 9 months ago
What? No camera operators??
pmcarro 1 year ago
LMAO!!!!!...but wait ...thats not funny!!!
MIKENYCE21215 1 year ago
That director looks like Ross from "You Can't Do That On Television".
wado1942 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
PLEASE DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL GET KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BY THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. TOMORROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. HOWEVER IF YOU DONT POST THIS COMMENT TO AT LEAST 3 VIDEOS YOU WILL DIE WITHIN 2 DAYS. NOW UV STARTED READIN DIS DUNT STOP THIS IS SO SCARY. SEND THIS OVER TO 5 VIDEOS IN 143 MINUTES WHEN UR DONE PRESS F6 AND UR CRUSHES NAME WILL APPEAR ON THE SCREEN IN BIG LETTERS. THIS IS SO SCARY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY
MissJeanetteChipette 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Ha ha ha, and I am!!!
proaudioguy 1 year ago
Comment removed
chach2000 1 year ago
You know this is so true! I hate all of our clients. Soon to be doing another form of work.
Rokapelli 1 year ago
This clip is so true is funny.
go4av 1 year ago
How true, this is incredible......
gess1971 1 year ago
Oh i am laughing. I live it every day.
Wiggy10877 1 year ago
LOVE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!
anthwhite 1 year ago
I hate pink noise during focus :P I guess that makes me the LD ;)
TheStuhero 1 year ago
Hi, I'm the passerby in the back hallway during load in. My job is to hold up the setup techs when I see them pushing cases to the ballroom by saying, "what, is there a Magic Show tonight"?
Roguetrex 1 year ago 2
Like with Spinal Tap, those of us in this business, have all worked with these types- every one of them...
rocketjohn718 1 year ago
Where is the poor tech director? Haha
obie666 1 year ago
Oh noooooo! I guess my next move is the open the classified ads!
mushkane 1 year ago
Funny stuff....on another note, why are all teleprompter ops total dicks?
scottyv17 1 year ago
You are BRILLIANT!! I am a Show Producer from Los Angeles and I came from the rock & roll industry. I joined AVHQ in 1988 and have been in A/V since then. This is the most accurate depiction of the business I have EVER seen. This level of creative is OFF the chart. Please let me know if you do this for hire - I could think of many stories for clients we could do this for - absolutely brilliant.
BillGanz62 1 year ago
Hi, I'm the account manager. I don't know what it is we're doing or how it gets done, but we're gonna make 42.5% on it. You folks just keep up the good work and do those all-nighters; I'll worry about details like taking the client on a Mediterranean cruise. Oh, yeah, overtime is authorized, but you can't charge for it. I'll see to it that you get an extra teeshirt.
moproducer 1 year ago
@moproducer Yup! See you at load in! When's crew call? Six AM? I'll see you around 10.
heresmokethis 8 months ago
Haaaaaa
45nmaster 1 year ago
I love the audio guy! I know a few of those types who will double compress an SM58 podium. One even told me that it was a common studio effect. I was like "BUT DUDE WE ARE NOT IN A STUDIO". And when an audio guy needs to spend two hours 'flattening' a room I just laugh. It is far easier to work with the room.
Yeah, I said it.
"How come you never hear an audio guy count to three?
Because they gotta lift on three."
:-)
//audio and video guy. not so much with the lighting though.
rooftopcs 1 year ago
Hello, I am a security guard. I used to be in the military or on the police force. I have a little bit of power, so I'm going to do my very best to harass the backstage crew whenever they try to get in or out of the ballroom. If you don't have a ID badge, I won't let you in, even if you have an A/V companies' logo shirt. My memory is so short that I can't remember who you are from one day to the next. I will lock the ballroom down so there is only one door in and out, and I will sit there.
vdoengineer 1 year ago
@vdoengineer i have met you too many times lolol
trevticks 1 year ago
Hi...I'm The Creative Director. I've worked my way up the production ranks for over 20 years, providing services in videos, events and marketing initiatives. Now that I am a Creative Director, I waltz into projects with a half baked idea that sends everyone into a tizzy. Then I run off to another meeting leaving the team to figure out how to do what I suggested. Then the designers do whatever they want and it looks great, when I swoop back in at the end and take credit for the whole thing.
bobpasc 1 year ago
Hi, I'm the teleprompter op. After painstakingly reading some of the script all I can say is "Who wrote this brochure copy and is trying to past it off as a script". I think all corporate script writers suck, they have no imagination. This producer/client is a real piece of work... I bet if I stick a lump of coal up his ass this morning, I would have a shiny diamond by this afternoon.
tvguylv 1 year ago
Hi, I'm an IATSE stagehand. I need four people to do my job. Don't touch anything, even if it belongs to you, or I'll close down this show. Last week a producer yelled at me. So ya know what I did? I cut all the intercom lines right in the middle of the CEO's speech. Wanna snort some coke? Hey, break time. We'll sit around and talk after break. What's that? After 5? Man, I'm getting triple overtime.
moproducer 1 year ago
Absolutely BRILLIANT. Obviously from someone that has experienced the egos associated with a corporate show. The lovely egos that failed in their original chosen career path.
"Those who can, do. Those who can't, do Corporate Theater".
skater10255 1 year ago
now thats show biz great video!!
martyman1 1 year ago
Hi I'm the guy that just brought the expen$ive set to the crappy loading dock. even though I'm a highly skilled stagehand I drive the truck 'cause no one else can back the truck into the dock w out ripping the side open . I just had to fight w security and the teamsters to get into the building and unload, and fight over handling finish painted sets w filthy gloves and I'm in a really good mood now. I'd rather work as a video opp or go back to europe and race motorcycles
moosiah 1 year ago
Hi, I'm the video director! I usually don't get brought in until the last moment and have to block out my shots because the producer doesn't have the budget to pay for camera ops during rehearsals. I'd like to get back into broadcast which is what I went to college for but I'd have to start all over as a PA so I'll be doing this until I am forced to retire because I can't do three jobs at once!
jimdrapervideo 1 year ago
outstanding!!bravo!!
cue1godoug 1 year ago
WOW! I don't think people should hire this production company! LOL
SoFloSandbox 1 year ago
Comment removed
smkluck 1 year ago
I feel like I'm at work.
micvideo3 1 year ago
Hi, I'm the bad news guy who is here to tell everyone that due to economic turndowns, all gigantic corporate meeting events are permanently cancelled. Everyone is laid off, except for the dumb little blonde PA who has been sleeping with me.
Take your masters degrees and find meaningful careers in the fast-food industry, or worse, teach Production 101 in a college.
moproducer 1 year ago
So brilliant!
RaYpInMoCo69 1 year ago
love it!
chrismacdona 1 year ago
Love it!
CHIEFJOCDMS 1 year ago
This has been flagged as spam show
So true!! You couldn't have described it any better!! :)
w00nkey 1 year ago
Ha! send to everyone that cares.
EtreCalore 1 year ago
simply awesome.
sakitzman 1 year ago
This is The best video ever! Don't know who made it, but you are Genius!!!
kidnoz 1 year ago
Hi, I'm the dumb ass person in the audience or from the company who will always come up to a video tech and ask ' can you get the game on that thing?' It can be a projector or a monitor, at any season; I am programmed to say game when ever I see video equipment.
Senseandspirit 1 year ago
@Senseandspirit Omg, I've been on camera, pulling shots usually long, steady shots when someone pats me on the back and asks that. Funny shit.
trevticks 1 year ago
What a coincidence... I have a 170 IQ and live in my parents basement as well...
azcoigreach 1 year ago
Comment removed
FlaxTV 1 year ago
“Hi. I’m the Art Director. I absolutely love wearing black skinny jeans and leaving my hair shaggy, and I revel in taking feedback on my designs and then returning new versions that are totally different, and yet in no way address the feedback I received.”
hubofhip 1 year ago
“Hi. I’m the AE. I make money off of other people’s work, and really love kissing client’s asses while rolling my eyes at everyone else. My hobbies include under the bus throwing, pretending that anything that went wrong has nothing to do with me overpromising and underbudgeting, wearing expensive suits and shirts with 2 buttons undone and walks on the beach.”
hubofhip 1 year ago
Hi. I’m the client executive that's always backstage, even though I’m not presenting and no one knows quite what I do. I like to hang around the crew food and wear a crew badge, and I like short sleeve button down shirts with thick ties. I also like to look over the audio guy’s shoulder and ask him how much the board costs. I make the crew guys feel uncomfortable for the first day, until they realize that I'm inconsequential and start pushing past me pretending to be doing something important.
hubofhip 1 year ago
"Hi. I'm the one hot chick that is a part of every load in crew. I like to wear tight jeans and black concert t-shirts, and the guys always send me up ladders so they can ogle my butt. I think that the fact that I keep my hair in two tight braids off the back of my head makes me less of a chick, and I clearly know what I am doing because I carry a really big leatherman."
hubofhip 1 year ago
"Hi. I'm a teleprompter op. When someone is talking on stage, I like to say "SHHHH!" and hold up one finger if anyone walks within 10 feet of me. But I also think it is OK to distract the graphics op with dumb stories and pictures of my kid/dog/neice/new 5th wheel whenever I damn well feel like it. I also like to complain that I have the most stressful job, but as soon as someone presents off script also like to complain that I have nothing to do."
hubofhip 1 year ago
"Hi. I'm a speech writer. I think that people actually listen to what I write. I also don’t know that once my speeches are taken onsite, they are completely changed in offlines until what is actually presented is a mishmash written by the producer and teleprompter op. Deep down, I still think I am going to release the great American novel someday."
hubofhip 1 year ago
"Hi. I'm the creative director. I'm convinced that none of these lowbrow A/V guys can understand my quiet genius, and love acting as though the client is just a hindrance to my earth shattering creative vision. I do... not realize that when the show ends, what I have done means literally nothing to anyone."
hubofhip 1 year ago
This just makes me laugh (at myself)
thomstanton1 1 year ago
Laughing and grimacing.
5DollahBill 1 year ago
Very very poignant!
clitlvr2112 1 year ago
Excellent! So true!
usekgb 1 year ago
Comment removed
bjhouser73 1 year ago