i find they dont do it to other narcissists, because that soon blows up into a total nightmare for them, fighting themselves... they are very dangerous and will stop at nothing to finish you off, and that even results in death. also expensive as the years of therapy required after being controlled and suppressed in such a relationship will often leave you will long term psychological issues, esp with a parent..get out now while you still can.
Pls communicate with me, Sam. My sister is such an accute example of NPD. You even used the exact same phrase I did, that "everyone in her life is sucked in to the black hole of her narcisssism". I feel certain that one day one of her children will murder her. What can I do? Yours, Susie
contd.......A narc ( like a wandering dog ) leaves you for the moment to be loved ,petted, fed, by even strangers . Not because he/she loves the stranger-- but because they are seeking SUPPLY. They LOVE their SUPPLY .They tolerate "relationships"--- because they NEED their SUPPLY.
WE are victims as long as we dont understand why the relationship IS SO MESSED UP. When we learn that the abuser is a NARC , THEN we have to let go of the responsibility of the situation.
My Narcissist coworker is at it again......after a week of not speaking- which was a peaceful experience! She comes at my with psychobabble, telling me that everyone says I am dressing like her???? Now mind you I have recenty lost 30 pounds and can finally fit into my thin clothes from a few years ago which were my clothes before I ever knew her, How do I make this stop??? Another coworker tried to punch her today and they went to the office WTH?????????
This perfectly describes my former roommate, a very deceitful and manipulate woman. She has nothing to show for all of this but still manages to cause distress to whomever she has contact with. I am non-violent and when I began to really see her, I really wanted to do her harm, but, chose to get away from her. People like this lady always will "reap" what they have "sowed" into the lives of others. Her actions will be her demise. Thanks for these videos, they are very informative.
I love reading and learning about psychology. Some of this is just pure genius. You're videos are awesome, always like watching them. Also this one in particular explains a lot of behavior I've played out myself, and also observed from other people.
Matthew 11:28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you Rest .29. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls... Sounds good doesn't it ? Get a holy bible and Sam's book and start reading & praying ! Your life will never be the same !
You are absolutely right, Sam. I developed severe PTSD solely from being raised by a narcissistic mother (from the psychological dehumanization and from the ways in which she chose to use and abuse me at her whim)
@LegalEagle000 I thought that I would add that everyone, as the author here mentions, is on the Narcissistic spectrum. Even Mother Theresa would register more than 5 out of hundred. Because she's the chosen one by god himself, although she is extremely empathic (perhaps to fault), chosen to do god's work. This belief is one of faith, but that sort of faith is grandiose. So one of the nicest people you could ever meet has narcissistic qualities, they are important to health and well being.
@LegalEagle000 Then again I think we've all got a bit of NPD in us, even some psychopathic traits. For instance: have you ever pretended to be interested in what someone is saying but just wanted them to *uck off? Or even felt like punching someone who was talking to you? If they asked you what you think of them would you tell them that you hate their guts?
We've all had nasty thoughts about others but I suppose we don't tell them because of empathy, or manipulation, but we still hate some!
The difference between Jesus and a narcissist is ; God is what every narcissist wants to be ! So Jesus is not a narcissist he is God ! If we all kept the first commandment there would be no narcissists! Since no one, can thank God for Jesus : )
Sam every sentence you speak says volumes to me, as I listen to you my whole life flashes before me and my reactions are textbook! It is a little unsettling to know that I am as predictable as my abuser ,but ever so helpful to know ,thank you. Malignant Self Love has become my second Bible and now with You Tube I am enjoying my education even more, I love it when you smile. To bad God wouldn't read his word on You Tube, ha ha.
@LegalEagle000 My god, can you imagine that conversation?
'Well, I'm planning on manipulating you so that you sign over your will to me, and then I'm going to push you down the stairs and hit you several times with a frying pan.'
Or this:
'I'm going to tell you the truth, I hate your guts think your a dork but I'm willing to put up with you until I get what I need.'
I would love to listen to them telling the full truth but it would be kinda shocking with some, perhaps not all, but some!
Like your new background matey!!! The previous one with the books had me subconsciously looking to the left, but now central, google-eyed!!! So the visuals just work here, nice, I bet a library or bookstore is like a candy store to you. Better than a plain background easily.
They say that NPDs and Psychopaths are 1% of the population, that must mean I bump into them everyday without knowing. Some are easily spotted, they may as well have a flashing sign on top of their head...
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW ...others are less obvious. There is no doubt that the ones spotted easily are purposely giving the game away with 'I'm the man' attitude, but the ones who are more manipulative are not that easy and hardly ever get caught out. For instant Harold Shipman was apparently one of the nicest people someone could meet, unless of cause he was giving a lethal injection. The only proper way to see through them is the NPD checklist! This definitely catches more of them off guard.
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW From that I've made a list of people I believe could be psychopathic narcissist:
Simon Cowell, Alan Sugar, Chris Rock, Kayne West (obvious choice), Jesus (Sam Vaknin thinks so too), Barack Obama (first time I saw him on TV sensed arrogance), Margaret Thatcher, David Cameron, Duncan Bannatyne, Gary Barlow...I could go on but will finish with Stewie Griffin for a laugh!
@puluc8 I get that vibe after watching him talking, I also get a similar vibe from Hasselhoff! Simon Cowell for sure, and more from him than anyone else. Why? Have you ever seen him emotionally upset? Even when people are having a nasty pop at him, the other judges do. Does he always think he's right? Yeap. Does he pretend to be emotional about things but it isn't that convincing? Yeah! No problems about upsetting others or destroying their dreams, he's a Psychopathic Narcissist. But not evil!
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW The X factor audience are shallow, immature and narcissistic. Barlow has to be direct and cruel or the crowd will hone in on his weakness like vultures. The X Factor is like modern day gladiators, maybe not that extreme but you get the point. The audience wants to see blood.
@puluc8 What's your thoughts on Simon Cowell and Alan Sugar? Simon Cowell has always put in wise cracks and possibly cruel demeaning comments about contestants, even before they had the live show and before X Factor. I always considered him a Narcissist. Alan Sugar had alarm bells ringing in my ears from looking at him, within in seconds. I watched a video from Sam and he mentioned playing on the Narcissist pride, Alan Sugar asked someone why he wanted to work for him. It was by the book...
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW ...the guy said, 'I want to learn from the best and feel that although I'm not totally qualified under your guidance and expertise I can learn a lot from you...' Or something along those lines. That is like candy to a Narcissistic boss, you always get the job even if you are less qualified than the other person. The guy was as well, far less qualified than the other person.
@puluc8 What about Jeremy Kyle? After looking at the criteria for NPD I would expect him to have it and to be psychopathic. But I would never have called him a psychopath using the checklist by Hare?! His body language and posture feels arrogant but like he's trying to hide it. He's also, seemingly charming one minute, then he switches to an extremely argumentative, screeching at guest, pointing out faults...not to mention he doesn't seem to get emotionally moved, just raged,,,alarm bells!
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW Jeremy Kyle is a horrible person, Alan Sugar yes a narcissist, Simon Cowell just tells people they can't sing. I'd say most celebrities are narcissist. On a serious note kids look up to these fuck ups!
I really look forward to your videos cause they come right at the time i need them as a reminder of the truth that is happening in my world. Helps me to stand strong in moving away from him. Thank you.
@OpiatedBliss Sam does a video on the distinction. The narcissist is in a deep, protective denial that they have to continually work on to maintain. They , on some level, understand what they are doing. But, since they see themselves as the highest priority, they can rationalize their behavior and disconnect their actions from their results. The psychopath has no such self-awareness and so no need for mental gymnastics to overcome guilt they are incapable of feeling.
Dear Sam, your comprehension and eloquence of this epidemic is staggering ,once again ! Tinyctio , hope it seems is not found in ourselves but in the fact that nothing is impossible for God, so ask him to renew your mind through Jesus and the holy spirit . We narcissists need to know there is a way out of our selfish behavior but we are not strong enough on our own. Thanks Sam for helping me to see ,it's me that has to still has to change ! need
i find they dont do it to other narcissists, because that soon blows up into a total nightmare for them, fighting themselves... they are very dangerous and will stop at nothing to finish you off, and that even results in death. also expensive as the years of therapy required after being controlled and suppressed in such a relationship will often leave you will long term psychological issues, esp with a parent..get out now while you still can.
SovereignBeing 3 weeks ago in playlist Abuse in Relationships with Narcissists and Psychopaths
Pls communicate with me, Sam. My sister is such an accute example of NPD. You even used the exact same phrase I did, that "everyone in her life is sucked in to the black hole of her narcisssism". I feel certain that one day one of her children will murder her. What can I do? Yours, Susie
susiehelme 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos
contd.......( from there on WE CHOOSE to be abused if we stay in the relationship )
heygeno1951 2 months ago
contd.......A narc ( like a wandering dog ) leaves you for the moment to be loved ,petted, fed, by even strangers . Not because he/she loves the stranger-- but because they are seeking SUPPLY. They LOVE their SUPPLY .They tolerate "relationships"--- because they NEED their SUPPLY.
WE are victims as long as we dont understand why the relationship IS SO MESSED UP. When we learn that the abuser is a NARC , THEN we have to let go of the responsibility of the situation.
heygeno1951 2 months ago
It is hard to imagine that (we) as victims of Narcs -- could be brushed aside with such ease.
I think of them as wandering dogs who "love you"( not real love ) when they are with you because you SUPPLY them with something they want.
heygeno1951 2 months ago
My Narcissist coworker is at it again......after a week of not speaking- which was a peaceful experience! She comes at my with psychobabble, telling me that everyone says I am dressing like her???? Now mind you I have recenty lost 30 pounds and can finally fit into my thin clothes from a few years ago which were my clothes before I ever knew her, How do I make this stop??? Another coworker tried to punch her today and they went to the office WTH?????????
laurieAable 2 months ago
If I never met and dealt with one personally, this might appear make-believe.
klewinhicks 3 months ago
This perfectly describes my former roommate, a very deceitful and manipulate woman. She has nothing to show for all of this but still manages to cause distress to whomever she has contact with. I am non-violent and when I began to really see her, I really wanted to do her harm, but, chose to get away from her. People like this lady always will "reap" what they have "sowed" into the lives of others. Her actions will be her demise. Thanks for these videos, they are very informative.
barbarabell2011 3 months ago 3
I love reading and learning about psychology. Some of this is just pure genius. You're videos are awesome, always like watching them. Also this one in particular explains a lot of behavior I've played out myself, and also observed from other people.
Tweek12345 4 months ago 2
This has been flagged as spam show
Matthew 11:28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you Rest .29. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls... Sounds good doesn't it ? Get a holy bible and Sam's book and start reading & praying ! Your life will never be the same !
Kathydrel 4 months ago
You are absolutely right, Sam. I developed severe PTSD solely from being raised by a narcissistic mother (from the psychological dehumanization and from the ways in which she chose to use and abuse me at her whim)
kozychik 4 months ago 2
More books.
shangrigreige 4 months ago
@LegalEagle000 I thought that I would add that everyone, as the author here mentions, is on the Narcissistic spectrum. Even Mother Theresa would register more than 5 out of hundred. Because she's the chosen one by god himself, although she is extremely empathic (perhaps to fault), chosen to do god's work. This belief is one of faith, but that sort of faith is grandiose. So one of the nicest people you could ever meet has narcissistic qualities, they are important to health and well being.
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
@LegalEagle000 Then again I think we've all got a bit of NPD in us, even some psychopathic traits. For instance: have you ever pretended to be interested in what someone is saying but just wanted them to *uck off? Or even felt like punching someone who was talking to you? If they asked you what you think of them would you tell them that you hate their guts?
We've all had nasty thoughts about others but I suppose we don't tell them because of empathy, or manipulation, but we still hate some!
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
The difference between Jesus and a narcissist is ; God is what every narcissist wants to be ! So Jesus is not a narcissist he is God ! If we all kept the first commandment there would be no narcissists! Since no one, can thank God for Jesus : )
Kathydrel 4 months ago
Sam every sentence you speak says volumes to me, as I listen to you my whole life flashes before me and my reactions are textbook! It is a little unsettling to know that I am as predictable as my abuser ,but ever so helpful to know ,thank you. Malignant Self Love has become my second Bible and now with You Tube I am enjoying my education even more, I love it when you smile. To bad God wouldn't read his word on You Tube, ha ha.
Kathydrel 4 months ago 2
This guy just described modern society.
doesthismakeanysense 4 months ago 4
@LegalEagle000 My god, can you imagine that conversation?
'Well, I'm planning on manipulating you so that you sign over your will to me, and then I'm going to push you down the stairs and hit you several times with a frying pan.'
Or this:
'I'm going to tell you the truth, I hate your guts think your a dork but I'm willing to put up with you until I get what I need.'
I would love to listen to them telling the full truth but it would be kinda shocking with some, perhaps not all, but some!
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
Like your new background matey!!! The previous one with the books had me subconsciously looking to the left, but now central, google-eyed!!! So the visuals just work here, nice, I bet a library or bookstore is like a candy store to you. Better than a plain background easily.
They say that NPDs and Psychopaths are 1% of the population, that must mean I bump into them everyday without knowing. Some are easily spotted, they may as well have a flashing sign on top of their head...
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago 2
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW ...others are less obvious. There is no doubt that the ones spotted easily are purposely giving the game away with 'I'm the man' attitude, but the ones who are more manipulative are not that easy and hardly ever get caught out. For instant Harold Shipman was apparently one of the nicest people someone could meet, unless of cause he was giving a lethal injection. The only proper way to see through them is the NPD checklist! This definitely catches more of them off guard.
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW From that I've made a list of people I believe could be psychopathic narcissist:
Simon Cowell, Alan Sugar, Chris Rock, Kayne West (obvious choice), Jesus (Sam Vaknin thinks so too), Barack Obama (first time I saw him on TV sensed arrogance), Margaret Thatcher, David Cameron, Duncan Bannatyne, Gary Barlow...I could go on but will finish with Stewie Griffin for a laugh!
Wonder what other people think of that list?
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW Gary Barlow is not a narcissist.
puluc8 4 months ago 6
@puluc8 I get that vibe after watching him talking, I also get a similar vibe from Hasselhoff! Simon Cowell for sure, and more from him than anyone else. Why? Have you ever seen him emotionally upset? Even when people are having a nasty pop at him, the other judges do. Does he always think he's right? Yeap. Does he pretend to be emotional about things but it isn't that convincing? Yeah! No problems about upsetting others or destroying their dreams, he's a Psychopathic Narcissist. But not evil!
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW The X factor audience are shallow, immature and narcissistic. Barlow has to be direct and cruel or the crowd will hone in on his weakness like vultures. The X Factor is like modern day gladiators, maybe not that extreme but you get the point. The audience wants to see blood.
puluc8 4 months ago
@puluc8 What's your thoughts on Simon Cowell and Alan Sugar? Simon Cowell has always put in wise cracks and possibly cruel demeaning comments about contestants, even before they had the live show and before X Factor. I always considered him a Narcissist. Alan Sugar had alarm bells ringing in my ears from looking at him, within in seconds. I watched a video from Sam and he mentioned playing on the Narcissist pride, Alan Sugar asked someone why he wanted to work for him. It was by the book...
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW ...the guy said, 'I want to learn from the best and feel that although I'm not totally qualified under your guidance and expertise I can learn a lot from you...' Or something along those lines. That is like candy to a Narcissistic boss, you always get the job even if you are less qualified than the other person. The guy was as well, far less qualified than the other person.
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW Yea. I'd say Alan sugar and Cowell are narcissists.
puluc8 4 months ago 3
@puluc8 What about Jeremy Kyle? After looking at the criteria for NPD I would expect him to have it and to be psychopathic. But I would never have called him a psychopath using the checklist by Hare?! His body language and posture feels arrogant but like he's trying to hide it. He's also, seemingly charming one minute, then he switches to an extremely argumentative, screeching at guest, pointing out faults...not to mention he doesn't seem to get emotionally moved, just raged,,,alarm bells!
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 4 months ago
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW Lets face it he only says what most of us would like to say!
Exsugarbabe1 2 days ago
@Exsugarbabe1 Well, if Jeremy Kyle and Simon Cowell aren't Narcissist there is one that definitely is: Allan Sugar.
IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW 2 days ago
@IJUSTSUBSCRIBENOW Jeremy Kyle is a horrible person, Alan Sugar yes a narcissist, Simon Cowell just tells people they can't sing. I'd say most celebrities are narcissist. On a serious note kids look up to these fuck ups!
Exsugarbabe1 2 days ago
@LegalEagle000 I'm pretty sure a narcissist would rather die, than do that.
puluc8 4 months ago 8
I really look forward to your videos cause they come right at the time i need them as a reminder of the truth that is happening in my world. Helps me to stand strong in moving away from him. Thank you.
Dassy0607 4 months ago 18
@samvaknin is there a major difference between a narcissist & psychopath? or is one a subset of the other?
OpiatedBliss 4 months ago 2
@OpiatedBliss Sam does a video on the distinction. The narcissist is in a deep, protective denial that they have to continually work on to maintain. They , on some level, understand what they are doing. But, since they see themselves as the highest priority, they can rationalize their behavior and disconnect their actions from their results. The psychopath has no such self-awareness and so no need for mental gymnastics to overcome guilt they are incapable of feeling.
kozychik 4 months ago
Dear Sam, your comprehension and eloquence of this epidemic is staggering ,once again ! Tinyctio , hope it seems is not found in ourselves but in the fact that nothing is impossible for God, so ask him to renew your mind through Jesus and the holy spirit . We narcissists need to know there is a way out of our selfish behavior but we are not strong enough on our own. Thanks Sam for helping me to see ,it's me that has to still has to change ! need
Kathydrel 4 months ago 2
No giggle... But still interesting video.
krstcmjns 4 months ago 6
Once recognized oneself as a N. The only thing to do is to run away from everyone to save them from harm. What is an N to do in this world?......
tinyctlo 4 months ago 5
Very adequete background!
patel136 4 months ago 8