Should We Do More To Reduce Violence In Our Dreams?

[IHateDrumMachines]

I'm watching this while really, really tired and sleep deprived.... it's trippin me the fuck out.

[mMoyny]

Im not studyin for my exams until I find a video with clifford banes

[tylernator231]

No lets not reduce violence!!!!

If we do there will be no mw3 or mw2 or anything like that!!!

Ur like 6 or a kid who is NOT allowed to play so u think if I can't nobody can. U think it's all about yourself. You are like a kid that was at my school when I was younger

[crazyboss5]

Wat the actual fuck.

[randomD777]

are they all sober? just saying

[kockgunner]

I haven't seen Gregory Dawson for so long I thought he was Clifford Banes.

[gugs51]

sex

[AyrProp39]

HOLD THE FUCK ON!!! CRIMINALS ... HAVE ........ DREAMS!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH­HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH­HHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!­!!!!!!!!!!!! i have dreams, does that mean i'm a criminal killer who wants to sell dead babys to you too? :O

[AdmiralBetas]

2:17 What the actual fuck? I mean, I don't even.

[FrettingCajarot]

That was trippy, at 1:59 I didn't even see anything wrong with a shot-up torso in the background, I thought it was there all along for a few seconds.

[bobba515]

this can't be real, TELL ME THAT THIS ISN'T REAL

[STsixx]

@bobba515 lmao.. are YOU being serious?.... it's joke lol

[Dannyboy56able]

is thisa joke?

[xephy89]

@Dannyboy56able No this is completely serious. Not a single trace of comedy. None.

[Dannyboy56able]

@Dannyboy56able oh it is, didn't watch the rest of the vid

[ArishaSmile]

"Studies have shown that the majority of people who have been convicted of violent crimes have a history of dreaming" XD

[nfo944]

Sex and Violence - The Exploited

[Tetraodontiformes]

They obviously haven't seen inception

[93tnek]

Especially funny for a Psych student. XD

[9mizzle]

HAHAHA 2:17 made me spit my cereal out on to my laptop, this shit is funny!

[pr00de]

i wanna read "time snake"

[kljMN2]

Nancy is the best.

[TheMrGerund]

Nancy gets me every time >.<

[ohanungsaya]

this is so genius. OMG. i'm in awe of the awesomeness of this vid. it's very original.

[DeadlyGrim]

For more mindfuckery, make sure to read the titles of the people underneath their names.

[Freefalldreams]

@DeadlyGrim I re-watched it in all its horror just to read those properly!

[ThePrinceroycelover]

Wow!

[JDMachinima]

These people are so.. OH MY GOD SPIDERS!

[Che8t]

Man the part where that guy breathed out that black smoke was so creepy.

[culvre]

@Che8t yeah, that freaked me out pretty good when i first watched this.

[deloreandmc88]

I don't think i have any money...

[Jawzdevos]

lol!!! muttherfuckig spiders!

[XxdogdigXx]

omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!­!!!!!!! lol

[facturaDan]

Is this a follow up to the study on teens and porn? I say more porn in dreams and less violence. Make love not war!

[Queenlafry]

We need inception.

[mattrc2]

How do they ever keep a straight face

[Blacckkfire]

"but I don't need a dead baby!" hahaha!

[20wayne20]

"Get these muthafuckin spiders off me"

[4ingP]

"The sexual content of dreams is often very inappropriate."

I wish this was the case...

[Ace3622]

Ahaha that duncan bitch weird

[jimmyzeke13]

that was fucking hilarious

[urmomstoxicface]

According to these people. Everything bad is "bombarding you" and is just everywhere and there's nowhere to escape. And good things are like. 'G- good? OH YEAH! That thing!'

[urmomstoxicface]

@urmomstoxicface Holy shit. didn't realize this was Onion News and I was sitting here like "Are you fucking kidding me......"

[pammenjk36]

This actually happened to me.

[Skaterboiva]

"Blood drenched Best Buy employees trying to sell you a dead baby"

classic!

[djtrixen]

2:17 freaked me out!

[fixajob1]

They're making fun of people that think video games have too much violence/sex.

[DarthKain0]

"I don't think I have any money."

*EPIC COUGH*

[simyan2012]

MOST OF MY DREAMS CONTAIN SEX NOT VIOLENCE I'M JUST SO FUCKING LOVING

[fireicer]

pmsl get them mf spider off of me lol

[adc1222]

holy fuck pausing at 2:17 is absolutely terrifying... his face... im scared for my sanity right now

[djtrixen]

@adc1222 Totally. I didn't even see your comment before I posted. Me too!!!

[NappyHeadJackie]

I'm surprised Clifforf Baines still has a job...He's NEVER there...! LOL

[Sojiroo2019]

'A blood drenched best buy employee trying to sell you a dead baby?' -Nancy Fichandler

[xXelmarcoCFCXx]

Get those muthafuckin' spiders off me!

[GregTom2]

FUCK!

I was alone, in the dark, at night. Watching the onion.

My back to an empty room.

Earphones on...

Then that.

I felt a giant chill in my back. I havn't been that genuinly scared for years... not even while playing amnesia!

[noahbuck7]

Welcome to Best Buy,  Can I Interest you in dead baby? How about our newest model, the Sleeper 2000x, now with 30% more mutation?

[stitch99]

Did she mention Christ-killers in her list of horrible things one might see?

[RaZRsHaRP1094]

Get those motherfuckin spiders off me! Lmaoo

[marsneedstowels]

Duncan and Nancy ftw.

[Shargrailar]

this is'nt MSNBC?

[2012singularity2012]

@Shargrailar Is that a question?

[JustinGirlyGirl]

Want a dead baby?

[Roboyoyo]

that was disturbing

[JJ13baseball]

Wow its a fucking dream who gives a shit if u kill a whore in ur dream its a dream nothing is going to happen unless u sleep walk

[ToLazyAlwaysDozy]

@JJ13baseball You do realise this is a spoof?

[Swmpy420]

@ Thomasquwack: Dude, You need to stop listening to Mayhem so much

[Thomasquwack]

BABY SKULL JEWELERY!!!!!!!

[stitch99]

@Thomasquwack

Only if you're part of the gang known as the Baby Skullz.

[noahbuck7]

@stitch99 Omg, WKUK reference! you just made my night.

[Alrof360]

I LOVE this woman!!! xD

[macheminchiadici]

Who's Clifford Baines?

[DanieruDesu]

:))))) dreams became so violent i stop sleeping months ago =)))

[anonymous1461]

The irony: trying to correlate your dreams with real scenarios don't add up. In other words, what happens in your dreams are almost never real. More specifically, is they say that if you dream something grotesque, you don't feel as disgusted as much as the horrible thing you dreamed. Doesn't make sense, does it? Exactly. They say your intelligent that you can make a distinction between your dreams and real life events, when really you can't, since you almost always forget what you dreamed. 

[inexcelsis17]

was that chick in the ad at the beginning on the can? ewww...

[DamYouGOLIWOG]

"But I Dont Need A Dead Baby?" xD

[Caerlean]

Duncan Birch, Devil

[echoxltu]

since 1892 ... lol :D

[Stephhyycakess]

2:16 makes me laugh so much, i think i just kept replaying that for atleast a minute

[briani4735263]

Wait, are their nametags and job descriptions changing?

[QueenAnime99]

@briani4735263 Yes.

[fuzzylogic218]

I love Nancy Fichandler

[fuzzylogic218]

Clifford Baines is my uncles deceased brother.

[juniperlei]

hahahaha XD

[MualamaAlien]

Do NOT watch this high. Terrible mistake.

[MualamaAlien]

This seemed scripted

[azuritet3]

i didn't like that one. when they show you the world through the eyes of the debater it's bad for the suspension of disbelief, which is why this show is so funny. it defeats the purpose of reporting the jokes as if they were real news... i mean it call into question the credibility of this otherwise completely reliable and informative news source.

[ji2323]

i work @ bestbuy. aint no better place to buy a dead baby.

[MegadethTillDeth]

That was the hardest I've laughed in a long time holy shit....

[iwannabepresident]

2:00 Any one notice the headless body with gunshots in it?

[ism822]

@iwannabepresident no shit

[RedeemingTheUneven2]

So because violent dreamers can turn violent criminals IRL, I say Clifford Banes' absences isn't by his own doing. Damn Nancy killed Clifford long ago...

[klayman2]

Lmao When he coughs his job was "devil"

[XxPHUNKYMONKEYxX]

"I don't think I have any money" MEGA COUGH!

[ayparillo]

Clifford Banes lives such an exciting life

[w15h0na5tar]

anyone notice how the names change on the bottom left of the screen? hahaha! 

[LuminateTheWorld]

HOW!?

HOW DO THEY KEEP A STRAIGHT FACE!?!

[sylvrkatk]

i've seen this video multiple times, and i still can't help but lmao at 2:17

[deserthawk48]

that old black women is so funneh

[mrsasafrass]

Absolutely brilliant!

[7tmo]

How many sick days does Clifford Banes have?

[FUCKYOUIAMOVER18]

NO JOKE MAN....... It's 2:31 AM right now. I was asleep at like 12:00 and i slept until 1:00. I woke up totally fucking unhappy because i had some insanely realistic fucking dreams in which a man would not stop chasing me with a razor blade.... Very stressful. Sleep sounds fucked now. Life is a big piece of shit. Always negative unless you have beautiful drugs to make it good. I'M SERIOUS AS FUCK. The onion is enjoyable too though. That was serious also.

[TheFeelin89]

nancy is sooooo fucking amazing.

[Boobalopbop]

@TheFeelin89 She and Joad Cressbeckler need their own show.

[invisible3steeves]

Nancy is fuckin awesome

[randomfriendlyguy]

Nancy makes the video lol

[TimeKaiser]

But I don't need a dead baby.

[Boobalopbop]

@TimeKaiser Then why did you go to Best Buy?

[ontop512]

I love what the peoples titles are, like " 4th grade teacher" and "Actress".

[ashliebelle]

I miss these videos. The new Onion is awful.

[Whimzy74]

Press 3 then at 0:51 press 8

[lombaxsecret]

HOLY SHIT they tried to sell her dead babies hahahahahaha

[bloodplus47]

DiCaprio pulled too many inceptions

[joey22306]

The black lady is so irritating

[TheDarklord0211]

one time i had this weird dream where i was dropping fat people out of this giant plane :D

and somehow i got to see a ground camera of where they would land so i got a close up on the exsplosive fat people!

i probley got this from playing to mutch l4d2!

[bonsaiburke]

"Studies have shown that majority of people who are convicted of violent crimes have a history of dreaming."

[mrgimp420]

'But I dont need a dead baby.'  'Then why did you go to Best Buy?'

[pnutbuttadelite]

LLMFAOROTFUISCATNTGUTGAGOW

Literally laughing my fat a** off rolling on the floor until i start coughing and then need to get up to get a glass of water.

[SilenusTheSecond]

Duncan's reaction to Nancy is awesome

[jahlinem]

XD. I think Clifford Banes is becoming my favorite reporter!

[TimeKaiser]

Nancy is my favorite person in this video!

[chetes15]

2:17 A Smoker!!!!! L4D xD

[zzzEPICxFAILzzz]

"had a history of dreaming"

[099kimi099]

but I don't need a dead baby... lol

[wowdude999]

I wish all group talkshows were like this

[Deviatefish13]

A blood drenched Bestbuy Salesman trying to sell me dead babies... right...

[chucknorrisisgodchas]

i dont think i have any money. khaaaaaaa!

[Skydance1110]

Well, Inception... hm... looking at you, Christopher Nolan...

[Memin99]

2:13 DUNCAN BIRCH - DEVIL

[TheLeviathanZero]

Clifford Banes is a slacker.

[TheGreenerItGets]

@TheLeviathanZero What are you saying? He's always at work on time.

[lovelytamja]

meeh I really want to chat i have pics too so

[alexalvarez1998]

pause at 0:50

[HildegaardVanHeusen]

But I don't need a dead baby!

[Music4AII]

Dead babies o.O

[HumphreyTheWolf]

These people remind me of the parents in South Park XD I love the Onion

[psycho642]

@HumphreyTheWolf  You know...they say that it's a lot more funny if comedy is played in a serious manner

[thecapone45]

Get those MUTHAFUCKING spiders off of me!!! LMAO!

[sk86566]

ted levinson sounds like stephen hawking. amirite?

[kipeastwood1]

@sk86566 No.

[cod4536984]

Lol

[Arogers2013]

LMAO!!!!! I love the nancy!!!!!!

[TheKaiserW]

GIT THOSE MUTHAFUCKIN' SPIDAS OFFA ME

[shark55580]

@TheKaiserW its funny because before i even read this comment i knew this qoute was gonna be the top rated lolol

[DeusMalleus]

I HAVE A DREAM!!! lol MLKjr

[EB88]

Nancy is hilarious they should give her her own segment

[rorcon]

Nancy has the best lines!

[mustangrule2]

i fucking love this one, it's hilarious.

[kyraiki80]

Duncan has written a lot of books 

[Stormeris]

but i dont want a dead baby! so why did you came to best buy >:D

[aloranor]

I dont think i have any money...

KHAHHHHH!

[cmLMolde]

@RandomGenericComme

Its gotta be bats or something! ^^

[theartofnotbeingseen]

this still has to be my favorite onion video

[thatkalikid]

OMJC i laughed so hard when the glasses dude huffed at the black lady

[SPionxe213]

get those mother fucking spider offa me!

[mmaven89]

Has anyone else noticed how Gregory Dawson always shows up during the most disturbing episodes of In The Know? I think the last two episodes he starred in had to do with the sale of baby skulls and whether or not he could get away with the hit-and-run murder of a pedestrian. Just saying...

[RandomGenericComment]

wat does he cough out @ 2:17 ???

[loverboyz901]

I know, dreams are just full of over-the-top sexual acts. I mean, every night i dream i am being fucked by a dolphin and sucking his cock and drinking his cum and...i fear i've said too much...

[Evhoney14]

@loverboyz901 My poor virgin eyes!!!!

[TrashyPatty]

@loverboyz901

Wow.

[loverboyz901]

@TrashyPatty Yeah, i'm going to hell

[Fawcks]

@loverboyz901 That is disgusting. I have never had such a vile, reprehensible dream. To even concoct it, your mind must be horribly tain- Wait. Orcas are dolphins, not whales...

Well, it doesn't count since he eats me afterwards in my dream. So there!

[jacobfbrown]

BUT I dont want a dead baby!!!

[12212012Oo19]

but i don't need a dead baby... '-'

[AriesUrbanAirsoft]

BOOM BOOM BOOM DAM IT WHERE ARE ALL THESE ZOMBIES COMING FROM?????

[chh5555]

I have finally found my home on the internet!

[xrzvicks]

what the name of the episode where they are all clueless about the topic?

[mysleevesinkd]

@xrzvicks

its called the situation in nigeria seems pretty complex.

[xrzvicks]

@mysleevesinkd thanks

[g12solution]

where the fuck is clifford baines?!

[shmegmo15318]

Filthy, That sheep dog is Filthy!!