Dan Savage on Issues with Getting off with your Spouse

[mmann66666]

om in the same boat as a gay male --- one night stands usually turn into me touching myself

[Mokurentate]

to not give yourself orgasms for a month for someone is asking A LOT! D:

[BentonRox]

Um, I was with him at first, but I'm a bit nonplussed by the idea that she should stop masturbating on her own. Obviously improved sex with her partner is qa worthy goal, but...well would he give that same advice to a guy or would he be advocating for the male need for a release?

[sunjoy80]

actually, yes, it is the *exact* same advice he gives to men. In fact, he's much stricter with the men.

[Renacier]

@BentonRox:

Actually, he does recommend stopping masturbation for men who have trouble orgasming. No worries about gender bias with Ol' Dan Savage.

[Froggy711]

Incidentally, this is the sort of advice you would give to people who become "married" to their vibrators and can't orgasm to another human being. Throw out the vibrator. Don't allow yourself to orgasm unless there is someone there with you. Your body will adjust.

[anneOnymous1]

I think he's saying that part of the reason she can't come very easily with her husband is the fact that she knows she has her own hand as a fallback. Laying off masturbation for a while (and he does say she should rule it out just for a while) might help her get past that particular roadblock.

And he gives similar advice to men, especially men who have become dependent on maturbatory "death grip."

[blrcres]

Maybe she's feeling guilty about fantasizing when she's with him.

[metrx330]

really good advice.

[Brillmongot]

Sound advice

[BentSlightly]

Such obvious advice that many women forget.

[slab99]

Maybe she's just not that into him?

[honeyxbee18]

love you dan (:

[MaicoMoon]

Bring in the toys. Problem solved.