Don't think this short version works as well...possibly cut the wrong segment, possibly the v/o. Needs a bit more dynamism if its going to move - otherwise leave it static, there's still a lot contained within the mise-en-scene to engage the viewer - especially as the v/o is the bit carrying all the information. Nevertheless, well done.
A great piece of work at your level.Really good to see you trying to emulate the professionals and doing a good job. There is a evidently a lot of work gone into this very short piece. The mise-en-scene is packed with'snippets'. Technically you have a done a great job of smoothing out all the moves, strings, stands etc. Painstaking, I'm sure.
Feedback to make it jaw-dropping... could have the table left as if the meal had been abandoned so that there was,ie coffee cup spilling its contents
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Don't think this short version works as well...possibly cut the wrong segment, possibly the v/o. Needs a bit more dynamism if its going to move - otherwise leave it static, there's still a lot contained within the mise-en-scene to engage the viewer - especially as the v/o is the bit carrying all the information. Nevertheless, well done.
arrangreenVidAr 1 month ago
Tim Abberley also said this about the cut down 12 sec version with a voice over!
arrangreenVidAr 1 month ago
This has been flagged as spam show
A great piece of work at your level.Really good to see you trying to emulate the professionals and doing a good job. There is a evidently a lot of work gone into this very short piece. The mise-en-scene is packed with'snippets'. Technically you have a done a great job of smoothing out all the moves, strings, stands etc. Painstaking, I'm sure.
Feedback to make it jaw-dropping... could have the table left as if the meal had been abandoned so that there was,ie coffee cup spilling its contents
arrangreenVidAr 1 month ago
Tim Abberley said this about the version with a voice over!
arrangreenVidAr 1 month ago
GREAT JOB!!!!
TheTeamMental 2 months ago