Added: 4 years ago
From: TheOnion
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  • *Study finds children's laughter loud and annoying*

  • THIS IS SHOCKING INFORMATION!

  • No, but seriously, is there any more to Nascar than this?

  • i hate nascar... but i love racing games lol.. omg im a hyprocite :o

  • Next they'll be telling us that military generals' strategy is to shoot people.

  • @theZinator lol they should do that one

  • @theZinator more like blow everyone up from 4000m away

  • "You might could hit 'em." Don't want that to happen.

    

  • GO STRAIGHT! GO STRAIGHT!

    I'M GOING STRAIGHT! I'M GOING STRAIGHT!

    GO FAST!

    I'M GOING FAST!

    GO FASTER!

    I'M GOING FASTER

    lol

  • Very few NASCAR tracks are actually oval, most tracks are more of a triangle and non of the turns are equal. NASCAR drivers and pit crews have alot more difficult job then any other form of racing. The car setup is the most important thing and is usually done according to a computer program that has thousands of different scenarios from years of racing programmed into it. Drivers and pit crews do extensive physical training not much different then hockey players. A nascar driver will lose a gre

  • @lashbera Formula 1 is much harder than NASCAR...They go much faster and the tracks are always differant and much skinnier. NASCAR is ridiculous and is watched by braindead rednecks who just like to see the crashes.

  • @MegaBlueZOMBIE if you think that, as a racing fan, the "narrowness" and speed of a racetrack/car determines the talent required to compete, go find another sport

    stock cars are much more difficult to drive than f1 cars..sure the drivers will just say theyre "different" to avoid this kind of conflict, but it is much easier to get a 1500 pound car producing 2 tons of downforce around a track then getting a 3600 pound car producing no downforce around a track going similar speeds.

  • @lashbera yea....what he said

  • @lashbera any fucking car racing sport requires the car to be at peak optimal performance stop trying to make this out as more then it is

  • As a fan of most auto-racing, I find it hard to express how much I hate NASCAR.

  • hilarious, I would also like to see the football one where they say, "just run real fast with the ball straight ahead! Don't get tackled!" Or the basketball one where they say, "Throw the ball into that net!"

  • Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks!! 

  • @TheYouwontgetit ummm.. That's a pretty ironic name, considering this is satire, unless your just trolling

  • That's such an unfair advantage the winner has. He gets real time feedback on what to do. You could see how the guy listening to the coach was passing everyone. I guess there is cheating in every sport :-/

  • If NASCAR is a redneck sport then where are the moonshines ? And they also do road courses as well so any one who says that all nascar does is a left turn is retarded...

  • @BobbyRossRacing93 Thinking that road courses alone make it just not turning left makes you look like a redneck. The engineering and mathematical calculations that go into setting a car up for each racetrack make it much harder than football, soccer, or any other ball sport. Its also why its a team sport, the driver's job is to push the car as hard as he can and relay the information of how the car is gripping the track back to the team, then they adjust a multitude of things to improve the car.

  • @BobbyRossRacing93 You think anybody would get in a car going at 270mph surrounded by 50 other cars going the same speed in a very unprotected vehicle without a few hits of tequila or something?

  • @oofoche234 NASCAR hasn't been redneck since the 1990s, dude

  • I am far too rich or smart to ever be a Nascar driver. For the rest of my life I have to live with that reality.

  • 2169 people are gay

  • @goldass96 NASCAR is gay.

  • lolnascar

  • @TheMightyDahQ wow, wishing someone to die? you are truly evil

  • @xXSpicylCurryXx words can't describe how ignorant, stupid, and retarded you are. ANY sport takes immense talent. I race go-karts myself, and it's extremely challenging

  • straighter! lol

  • you idiots have obviously never seen the watkins glen

  • am i the only one who laughed when he said nascar strategy

  • look 60 butt hurt nascar fans

  • @ownwar8 I'm pretty sure anyone who's sober, and has a driver's license could race in NASCAR. If given the proper funding, and an actual car. The only problem is getting a vehicle -_- Nascar is also boring. LOOK, HE'S MAKIN' A LEFT TURN!!!!!!!

  • I'M TURNIN' LEFT!

  • Curling is also a game of technique, but you still look retarded doing it.

  • The most important thing is to never turn right.....turning left is the key!

  • im suppose to look out the windshield!

  • NASCAR PEOPLE ARE KIND OF STUPID XD

  • @TIMOV96 Actually you are kinda stupid, Nascar and all racing for that matter is a game of physics, its not just turning left and then going strait. you have to have a setup that loads up in the right places so the car will rotate through the center of the corner or it will push off of spin. Throttle control is also very important, you have to lift or burp the throttle just enough to set the nose but not scrub off all of your speed. you also have to enter the corners correctly of loose time.

  • STRAIGHTER! That's what he said ;D

  • i have never laughed for 2minutes and 41secs straight in my life before

  • I enjoy this video, even though as someone who watches IndyCar and F1, I appreciate both ovals, road *and* street courses. I think a competition that does not have all three is missing out -- NASCAR does not have road and street, F1 does not have ovals.

  • Comment removed

  • I love how people badmouth NASCAR when none of them could do it.

  • @ownwar8

    The question is why they would "want" to do it.

  • @AugustusLarch Some people have a passion for it.

  • @ownwar8

    Some people have a passion for rubberband paddle ball games as well.

  • @AugustusLarch And you have a passion for trolling.

  • @ownwar8

    Get a thicker skin Ponce. The world's a rough place maybe you should get some kneepads.

  • i love how people always forget the nascar has 2 road courses and the indy has ovals lol

  • "we're go fast and were gonna turn to the leeft somethiiiimes"

  • @killerbiller35 -- haha the South Park episode about Nascar was fucking hilarious !

  • I don't know why so many drivers have such a hard time turning left instead of right. I mean, how many Nas Cars need to be destroyed?

    Btw, NBC should have sent Nas Car fan Brian Williams to do this interview.

  • i love nascar! my favourite part is when they turn left.

  • NASCAR sucks.

    GO F1!

  • @mpingola is that why NASCAR has the most fans and formula 1 is an after thought

  • @MrFootballstud20 got any links to back up your shizz?

    I wonder if they arent all schizophrenic....watching cars go round and round must have made them maniacs.

  • @mpingola  read the paragraph on stock car racing of the autoracing wikipedia page

  • @MrFootballstud20 Nascar is popular. But only in America. I have yet to see anybody throughout mainland europe or here in Britain love, know about in detail or watch nascar. F1 on the other hand, even I watch F1 and I dont have any real interest in racing in general. Why? Atleast there is some skill involved rather than a simple left turn every so often.

  • @Perilix nascar is more popular abroad than what you think...

  • @Perilix The beaners love nascar.

  • Funny, but the fact remains that drivers who have made their careers out of road-course racing come to NASCAR in droves every year thinking that they can handle it, and they're all usually gone mid-season because they can't manage to be competitive. Oval racing requires a driver to be nearly perfect every turn of every lap, whereas road racing allows one to be sloppy for 80% of a track where there are maybe 2 places where it's even possible to pass. But y'all can keep looking down your noses. ;)

  • "...tornado warning set to vibrate."

  • lol no one watches Nascar just to see em make left turns all day no they wanna see BIGASS crashes an someone die!! If theres no crashes or dead ppl the crowd will be like "awwww i just spent all day watching some guy make left turns"

  • NASCAR is the special Olympics of racing.

  • @DudeMcCheeseforwhat ouchh but yet true LOL

  • @DudeMcCheeseforwhat

    Indy car racing isn't much different. Oval racing is for very drunk people. IN Europe they only use ovals for testing engineering on vehicles.

  • @DudeMcCheeseforwhat

    lol New Zealand

  • @DudeMcCheeseforwhat TAKING A LEFT TURRRN TAKING ANOTHER LEFT TURRN takking another.... left turn...... this kinds sucks dosent it.also yeah nascar sucks

  • @DudeMcCheeseforwhat i was in the special Olympics of fucking your mom

  • @dylopayne Congratulations, you both admit you were in the special Olympics, and that you were the only entrant at the fucking my mom contest. Too bad you still only got second place.

  • @DudeMcCheeseforwhat no you read that wrong. its was where a bunch of retards fuck your mom. nobody with a working brain would do it. i quit after the blowjob round

  • @dylopayne So... you admit you're retarded? Guess we agree on something at least.

  • @DudeMcCheeseforwhat yes? i was in the special olympics dumbass

  • @dylopayne With a comeback that insults yourself, I would expect so.

  • @DudeMcCheeseforwhat man u are just fucking wrong in every way possible how would u feel if u were in the special olympics and people made fun of u.....u need to get a fucking life and stop picking on people...all uare is a big bully cuz u got no one else in ur life alll u care about is yourself u fucking asshole!!!!!!

  • @CountryBoy583 I love this because of how wrong you are. Read who started it, and what they said. You kinda lose the right to complain about what people say to you when you try to insult their mother. On that note, classic angry response by someone so very, very uninformed. So I won't even insult you. I'm sure anyone worth their salt will see you've managed that on your own.

    Thank you.

  • ill drink a shot every time someone says "left"

  • I don't care much for NASCAR but it is obviously not that easy.

  • they are making a left turn! and they are making another left turn! and another left turn!- Jeff Dunham

  • "Is this straight enough? GO STRAIGHTER!!"

  • Dear Coach, I am trying ma best to be a NASCAR driver. It is ma big ambi.. dream. But ah have trouble telling ma laif from ma right. How do you keep it straight in your head?

  • don't like leaving comments on nascar videos... (if you don't know why google my name replacing 5s with s's and 1s with is)

  • is this straith enough

    straither! hahaha

  • "funny but not true",says someone in the comments....why, have you seen anyone turn right? if yes, how did that work for him?

  • @nikoskabbadias ive seen someone turn right at infenion and watkins glen

    they later went on to win the race

  • ROFLMAO AHAHAHA

  • the 57 dislikes drove right and went into the wall

  • Lmao this is funny

    It's only 0.1% true tho

  • @monkeyass6 The track isn't really oval-shaped? ;-)

  • GO STRAIGHT, GO STRAIGHT... NOW TURN LAIFT! AA SAID LAIFT. NAA GO STRAIHGT, NAAW STRAIGHT!!! STRAIGHTER!

  • 234562 angry rednecks own a computer, 56 know how to get on youtube

  • I used to like NASCAR until I had to listen to some minister pray for the drivers and every body got up and the National Anthem played and most people put their hands over their left nipple for some crazy reason that I haven't figured out yet.

  • @cobalt100 heh satire huh?

  • NASCAR fans are bigots that don't like me because i'm pro choice. It's my body and I will turn whichever way I damn well please!

  • Go straight drive faster, go straight drive faster. go Jeff Gordon.

  • Nascar Coach? WTF lmfao

  • "you might could hit him" Ha!

  • 55 Americans watched this video

  • @nucknoel89 Are you kidding? Not only is this an American video, but the vast majority of the people who watched it are American.

  • @cameleopard42 I am kidding. I was promoting the stereotype that all Americans are NASCAR fans. At the time of my post, 55 people had clicked dislike. Therefore I was jokingly suggesting that the 55 people who disliked it were Americans (ie. NASCAR fans), and that everyone else who had seen the video was not American (ie. not NASCAR fans).

  • @nucknoel89

    I've never heard that stereotype.. lol.

  • lol the headset convo was funny.........hahahaha

  • lol the convo with the driver is hilarious

  • LMAO!!!

  • Hahaha I love his readneck accent xD

  • Nascar is boring, only straight line...

  • You guys are nuts, Nascar is so much more complicated than you can fathom. And not all the tracks are ovals, Infineon for example, it looks like my hair in the morning!

  • Is that the Busch Stadium on the background?....

  • if you read the bottem you will not be able to believe that this is a real station.

  • lol, well that just goes to show you don't have to have much in brains to be in one of the worst/most boring motor sports.

  • Dude "onion news" should replace "weasel news" on GTA .

  • Poor and stupid!

  • Frickin' hysterical! "Keep goin' fast!"

  • Frickin' hysterical!

  • favorite video

    

  • 52 people are NASCAR fans

  • @Grizzlo503 I'm one and I can still laugh at this.

  • This guy knows his stuff. My coach told me to only push the pedal down 3/4 of the way, no wonder I lose.

  • This is the dumbest fucking waste of a half hour on TV. I couldnt even try to laugh thats how bad it is.

  • whats exciting about watching bunch of red necks turning left?

  • @Medifro

    When they crash, they might die.

    Unfortunately that doesn't happen much.

  • 50 people are nascar drivers and/or fans

  • @MrFuggles123 Or NASCAR fans that have no sense of humor.

  • Dang!! I should have watched this news report BEFORE I decided to turn RIGHT in my last race! :•O Man, is my face red!!

  • "Its rare to talk to someone who knows so much about nascar".LOL

  • Look! Another left turn! What could they possibly do next?!?

  • read the crawl at :05.

  • Onion >>>>>>>>>>

  • "I always tell my drivers: look out your windshield. If you see a race car over there, don't drive into that place." LMAO

  • the suspense... its killing me! omfg another left turn!!!

  • Did you know that he's going left?

  • god i fucking hate nascar

  • @goldenxtc god i fucking hate you

  • They forgot to mention that you have to use your hands to control the steering wheel, not your feet.

  • hahaha turn to the lefffft !

  • i just wonder, can nascars actually turn right? xD

  • 48 ppl cant turn left or push the pettle down all the way

  • When I grow up I wana be a NASCAR driver and I will be the straightest of them all but I will go from timt to time left !!!!!

  • 48 people are nascar lovers.

  • wonder if south park poor and stupid episode was somehow inspired by this

  • going left! going left! going left!!!

  • Why won't these adverts FUCK OFF?

  • 48 people dont push the pedal down all the way

  • With a coach like that, I could have been the next Richard Petty!

  • GO FAST! STRAIGHT AND FAST! 

  • i love nascar and this is some good tips lol

  • *takes notes*

  • loved the radio transmission. I think im on my way to be a professional.

  • I'm a big NASCAR fan and I still find this funny!

  • Is this straight enough?

    STRAIGHTER

  • ow... turn left there... I always turned right oO

  • POOR AND STUPID yup! :D

  • @rtdnlcastro vagasil anyone?

  • best part 1:24 - 1:28  XD

  • "STRAIGHTER!"

  • TURN LEFT! TURN LEFT! HE'S TURNIN LEFT!

  • my uncle was driving the 42 car!

  • "If he turns right, then he's gonna drive right into the wall, and all those other drivers are gonna pass him and they're gonna win the race and he's gonna lose and that's not good"... Truer words have never been spoken.

  • supercharged lawnmower racing wooo....

  • Dan Amon reminds me of Randy Quaid. 

  • i didnt know nascar had coaches. whats the point of coaches anyways in nascar?

  • @TitWarlord to tell them to drive fast

  • @TitWarlord For the same reason they have managers in baseball. When you figure it out let me know.

  • @theenforcer1977 climate change isnt even real its just hippys talking smack