My Husband Gave Me Permission to Have an Affair - Now What?

[vegeta2030]

Funny... What a God-less world...

[mhamadac]

OH COME ON, you two are idiots. Tell the girl to buy a dildo and shut up!

[wildchunk]

till death do us part, for better or for worse, in SICKNESS and in health.

[snoib100]

add me on facebook i'm sahara paisley. i'm new on fb 18 ys black and white profile pic so add me girls or guys!!! <3

[beckasha83]

you all are trollin like bitches XD

[kirbylee57]

I sad for the husband too. He may think its ok if she finds herself another lover, or if she just finds a lover. Thinking of your spouse or girlfriend having fun in bed with someone else is about the most painful thing one can experience. I just cant imagine knowing if my wife was sucking some guy not to mention watching . Some like it but that just bewilders me.

[tonik116]

i think she should remain loyal to her vows, because marriage, like alot of things has become commercialized..but mind you its still a sacrifice to stay loyal to your vows for better or worse sickness or health..if you ask me, its a crappy card she was dealt to be in this situation, because her sacrifice to be a woman of word in my opinion, should be to not have sex. and to keep intimacy with her husband..do a little dance, kiss, tell stories of memory..etc. just my opinion..peace

[xmaniacxkillax]

are you guys always drunk when you do these things? cuz you always have liquor chillin there next to you

[mabeg11]

Are you fuckn kidding me. I would fuckn kill my girlfriend if she cheaed on me, let alone giving her have an affair.  Are you even fuckn human. man this is so fucked up.

[HellsHighwayTrooper]

@IDontHoldTheTruth its fucked up.

[HellsHighwayTrooper]

WTF is this shit

[4TheTabsInUrEyes]

i just don't get why the husband would wait 12 years before suddenly deciding that he wants his wife to have an affair....why 12 years? why starve her of sex for so long and suddenly reveal she has his consent to have it with someone else? i don't understand that

[OlyJeebus]

I also do have to mention that at later stages in a relationship a relation isn't based on love anymore, but on trust. Sure you love your wife/husband, but trust is a way greater part of your relationship. Without trust there is nothing to stick around for. You will become suspicious and when she/he says im out to get something to eat... that you start to think what if she's going out to have dinner with some guy or what if she's cheating on me.. yeah.. not good.

[OlyJeebus]

It depends on your own point of view, but in my honest opinion if you need a different guy to fullfill your needs.. well yeah something is wrong. Talk about it.. work on it

If you really love your man though.. I mean seriously. Don't even do it when he says its ok.. because it will damage him, and your relationship.

[21inchesmofo]

hahahahha dude needs to seriously "improvise" on behalf of his penis and for the benefit of his poor wife.

[marktheman045]

I would never. I feel so bad for the husband

[jhawk2817]

dan is so awesome!!

[IloveHilaryandAshley]

o.O i dont really understand..why cant the lady just use sex toys? a dildo maybe? Not trying to be pervy or anything. But IF this lady is in love with her husband wouldn't it be awkward to have sex with someone else? If you want pleasure that bad..find toys.That marriage doesnt seem like it will last. but remember this is all my opinion.

[PFCAhammed]

@IloveHilaryandAshley depends, some women can really genuinely separate sex from other emotions.

[CoolStudyGuides]

yeah the catholic church STILL thinks it's wrong,,, and I'm Catholic lol

[ekocentric]

"Open" marriage doesn't always stay that way. It seems that someone's feelings get hurt sooner or later...But I agree that love and sex are two different things.

[electricprunes1]

never have sex outside your marriage. ur hubby will ultimately resent u & u will feel guilty. instead, get yourself a bi grlfd & invite hubby to join in on the action. If he doesn't get hottttt over this idea - every hetero man's biggest sexual fantasy- he's as gay as they come and you need to move on & find yourself a hetero man

[Zattatatta]

Who gave these two idiots the idea that they have any authority to tell someone to go against their religion? The woman has a religion she follows, it is important to her. When a husband decides not to have sex with his wife anymore, the relationship is over. Marriage is a COMMITMENT people!! If you can't stand being with one person, DON'T GET MARRIED!!! I believe it is acceptable in most religions to divorce if the husband has had an affair, which this schmuck probably already has.

[littlegreenjason]

@Zattatatta Well, in essence the woman who wrote the letter gave them permission to tell her to "go against her religion". Keep in mind, she wrote in to a secular internet show that deals with sex issues so she obviously is leaning towards finding another lover. Who knows if she's talked to her minister or whatever.

Also, if you watch the video all the way through, they give their opinions but then later say that this is a personal decision and she needs to appeal to her God for the answer.

[demanvanhetstokbrood]

@Zattatatta You're thinking a bit in black and white here:it's not because you are religious that you have to follow that religion blindly!My cousin is a LESBIAN CATHOLIC!So it's possible to go against your religion's ideals.It's for the poor woman to decide what is more important:her religion or her happiness.Besides, ur assimng that her husband has had an affair.But the suggestion could be an act of love, cuz he doesn't want his wife to be unhappy.And don't call them idiots, it's unrespectful

[hellsmouth1]

No problem girl, ... find a 'fuckbuddy' and be totaly open to your hubby.

I was blown away that you waited so long to discuss this, in our county (the Netherlands) we discuss such maters within a couple of months and there are absolutly no problems.

Key word: transparancy.

Go girl... have some fun.

[Balulalula]

It should be illegal to allow two twits like this to give out advise ...

[1PhatHarleyOwner]

thats the problem anyone who hears of open marriage or relationship they confuse sex with love sorry sex isnt love love is what a man & woman fells for each other for a life time sex is a pleasure that takes place to get enjoyment at the time...im in an open marriage yet me & my wife have yet to have luck finding anyone in our open marriage yet we still have it open hoping..and we still have a sex life to from time to time between us...just wanting to find us some one each of us...

[wslyder]

Dan and Jen... You are worthless. Please, do us all a favor and Shut Up. You do not have the mental ability to answer questions like this and will likely screw peoples heads up beyond repair. You have "opened the door" to who knows what consequenses in this marriage and have avoided the correct answer which would be for them to seek qualified counselling. Go Away, Please.

[TheSuperk25]

He has your permission go ahead just make sure that you and that guy will ony be no strings attached.

[thatoneguy254]

12 years?!?!?!?! wtf religious or not i would have started an affair at about 8 months, fuck that dude

[AIDDYSHA]

silly husband

[123cano]

Fucking stupid shit of course that shit is wrong!!!!

[Wizza1987]

HOLY SHIT 12 YRS?........I would hang myself by my dick

[aintajokenomore]

These people havent a clue what they're talking about. I feel sorry for them

[payam91]

damn she must be really hungry for some sausage.

[cirkic]

burn them pls

[darkangel8908]

What she needs to do is sit down and talk to her husband. Figure out why its been 12 years and if things aren't right fix it even if the fix would be an affair and honestly if the husband becomes OK with it its not an affair it would be an open relationship.

[iHateMyHusbandAlot]

Having affairs has become a hobby for me. Thats why i have that video i made lol

[Winnersdonthavecows]

Whore!!

Cheating= wrong.

I hope you will catch an STD REAL soon.

[Novantii]

I don't really care if people decide to cheat on each other but it would be nice if you had to be sterilized first. Imagine having some "cuckold couple" or something as parents. I don't care about the religious aspects... that's just child abuse to put two deranged submissive people who don't value an intact family in charge of the development of a child while mommy is on "dates with her lovers". Liberals are truly just.... depressing people...

[willbosmond]

ya i agree so open minded about everthing, free thinkers, why wont they just listen to there elders they know whats best. Why should they have a choice to get out of a horrible marriage and have a relationship they enjoy. When you get married and have kids you have to stay with them for the rest of your life. If your life is misserable suck it up cry baby, your mother did.

[SavedByGraceAdam]

Dan and Jenn -- two Hellbound, evil reprobates. God hates you, and you're going to Hell. How dare you encourage someone to have an adulterous relationship. You clearly don't believe the Bible, and probably wouldn't care if you never saw it again. If you DID care about the Bible you would know that God's love is conditioned upon REPENTANCE, and OBEDIENCE to His standard. It doesn't matter if you like the standard or not -- it's His standard. You are both going to Hell. Have a nice day.

[stuckupangela]

if you really believed in God, you wouldn't say such things

hypocrite

and who cares if they don't believe what you believe

not everyone has to believe in God

[willbosmond]

I am a christian, I believe in god, I dont believe in the bible, if i did i would be a blind follower, the bible has little to do with God, it is merely the stories lightly based on actual events which have been manipulated to help answer peoples questions about the world, and to surpress the minds of peasants so that they dont begin to believe that they are just as inteligent as there lords, and cause them to revolt.

[cheleor]

@willbosmond its really stupid to call yrself a christian and believe in the bible. is it not the bible that talked about God's love for us (john 3vs16), the coming of the messiah ( jesus christ), all the miracles that jesus performed amongst others. if it was not for the bible how would we have known about the creation of adam & eve and the fact God created everything in 6 days and rested on the 7th day. i just dont understand how a christian can say that they dont believe in the bible.

[willbosmond]

@cheleor

but i dont think that the creation of adam and eve actaully happened

i dont think that the world was created in 7 days ether

i think those are just stories made up in order to explain lifes harder questions

i dont have to believe in the bible to be a christian do i?

and if i do then well i guess im not a christian

the truth is the bible was probably altered over the course of 2000 years so while theres deffinatly some historic facts in there

[willbosmond]

@willbosmond

the mysticism probably isnt true

tho it would be pretty awesome if it was

course if it is all true

then why has there been a abrubt absense of

his presence in recent times

god must of got lazy :/

[Winnersdonthavecows]

God damn you, YOUR GOD IS A FALSE GOD (There is now plenty of proof on Youtube).

Basing a marriage on the fear of being burne, beaten, & starved is wrong in ANY context.

Outside of your own religious bubble, you sound as currupt as a cheating lover yourself.

Your life must be hell right now.

[willbosmond]

@Winnersdonthavecows so whos the True god then?

/ does it really matter?

[Winnersdonthavecows]

@willbosmond My comment was aimed @ those spreading religious sexual fear toward the masses, not yourself, your comments make too much sense.

As for your question IF there is a sentient god he would be be something unexpected & assumingly he would be a loving deity.

As for "Does it matter", Einstein said "If there is a just god he will not burn you for disbelief, if there is an unjust god we should not worship him, & if there is no god, we can strive to die leaving loving our memorys behind

[willbosmond]

@SavedByGraceAdam

i thought god loved everyone tho?

didnt jesus die for our sins

wouldnt that include dan and jenn then to?

wouldnt they be forgiven for being hellbound, evil reprobates??

if god can hate then hes not really a savior is he?

[jgholster]

your "heart" will lie to you

[AVEHD]

"Don`t confuse sex with love and devotion" in a marriage relationship (cuz a marriage we are talking about) ... WHAT!!? OMG

[Guevara1961]

buy her a vibe idiot, looool

[JohnBrown1016]

I agree. ;)

[JohnnyRock2000]

A cheating woman will likely lose her heart to someone else eventually.

It's rare that women can love two men at the same time.

Could be possible...but the groundrules have to be laid down. i.e. once a month...that sort of thing.

[jessicanin]

oh rly and you know this how???

[JohnnyRock2000]

I know this.

As women experience things, emotions eventually develop and define the experience for the woman. That is where meaning for a woman comes from...the emotions.

Sex, eventually ...is full of meaningful emotions for a woman, way beyond the act.

These emotions will develop eventually...to provide meaning for the sexual experience.

Love...attachment...caring....

And often the other side of those emotions too,...jealousy, rejection and sometimes hate.

Emotions provide meaning.

[jessicanin]

You are speaking specifically of monogamy. Please remember that there are polyamorous people out there who are fully capable of loving more than one person because they understand and communicate their emotions, and deal with all sorts of emotions through discussion. Also, to believe that it's just women who get emotionally attached after having sex is ignorant... I've had guys get attached when I just wanted the sex. I guess I'm progressive for such an emotional, fragile woman huh?

[JohnnyRock2000]

When I say eventually I mean long term. You are in your twenties. Long term has not really started for you. Have your fun.

[tghetto5]

Okay, im only going to say this once.

watch yourself!

[sweetpuppydogeyes]

if u are religious... that is fine ... but why do u expect others to feel the way u do! U live life the way u want and let others decide what they want. You shld only judge yourself. I might not have an open marriage but why cast judgement on people who arent religious or share different views. Religions can be so hypocritical!

[DanAndJenn]

Great comment.

The world will be a much better place if we can all learn to accept others...

[Cody12355]

@DanAndJenn i accept that ppl are different. i would never accept lack of morals.

[akashk9111]

@sweetpuppydogeyes , maybe u should convince him to make love to u !

[bcabmac]

typical liberal anything goes thinking

[Antaraxiaa]

Your advice is evil! I mean it.... you should shut up and mind your own business, not give such horrible advice. Keep them for yourself, cause you are delirious. God is not pleased about what you 2 speak.

People, ask God, not these 2 lunatics! "Affair has such a negative connotation" -> of course, because it is negative!

Stupid!

[LoonyLooners]

"Stupid"? Any reasoning behind this? (that's "reasoning", not "religion") If her husband is saying she can go do it with someone else, why should she not?

[Antaraxiaa]

God is not a religion... He simply is. No matter what others say.

Even if my husband would say "go have sex" I wouldn't. I control myself, sex doesn't control me. Animals obey their instinct, humans not. This is what makes human different. THINKING, SELF CONTROL...

On the other hand, it is a way to show my husband I remain his entirely. I am with him not because we can have sex together, but because he is more than a sexual partner for me.

[houliebeforethefall]

are you kidding? god would be fine with this, read the first couple pages of the bible and you'll find ou how to sell your wives, and duaghters into slavery... actually ask god.... hehehe

[Antaraxiaa]

:)) yeah... ask God. Good point. But when you read the Bible, read it all. Not only what is pleasing to your ear or eyes ;) The first pages are about the very beginning of the world, when only a few people who had to multiply. That was smth else. But read it all, ok? :) Bless

[polym3]

Read the book "Divine Sex" by Philo Thelos. He is a minister who became an expert on bibilical languages. His conclusions will totally debunk the religious guilt on sex and related ideas as Adultery, multiple wives and other sexual issues thrown at religious persons. The book can be found online at Amazon and other sources