One christian gave me one of those. It was about a stupid story about a sick guy who rejected a doctor's cure because he thought there was nothing wrong with him and he died, and the doctor cried.
It was just as stupid as this one. Because there really IS nothing wrong with us.
I loved those when I was a little brainwashed child. Would grab them from church ALL the time. So glad i got rid of that shit. I remember grabbing one so I knew what to say when I was praying to be "saved" so I did it right. Haha. Then I got older and real life hit and I realized how stupid all this shit was.
One hundred and seventy , eighty years. Yep that sounds like a Christianity view. like everyone that thinks 2012 is the end of days. but did you think that the calendar is knot perfect ,. Give or take maybe 400 years . either way, so are we living in 2412 or 1612 .. YOU PROVE ME WRONG --- go on do it !!!!!!!
This video made me want to do drugs! I guess I will smoke some pot, which I grew and did not get raped for. Remember the ads that told us that buying pot contributed to terrorism? This is why I grow MMJ. If some day a cop asks me why I am growing pot I will tell him to fight terrorism!
In Jack Chick's world, EVERY Homosexual encounter results in AIDS - even if they are both virgins - and you always seem to die in a week. You can blast worn-out crack whores in every hole in their body, completely unprotected, and be fine... but one penis in your butt and BOOM! Super AIDS, motherfucker!
Methinks Mr. Chick was obsessed much over man-on-man buttsechs...
i use to be a big fan of these tracts, i guess for the same reason people like horror movies - sometimes it's fun to be scared shitless. the unfortunate thing is, when you're a fundy kid like i was, these things weren't idiotic fiction, they were real and they did very real psychological damage to impressionable young minds. laughing my arse off at this stuff now is like therapy for me.
@Bergkristall "Catholics are not christians either."
So there were no Christians after Jesus had Peter establish his church, for 1500 years, till Luther showed up? Well, if Jesus was THAT bad at his job, why didn't your god do the right thing and just send LUTHER down so that 60 generations of Christians wouldn't die and go to hell for not being "real" Christians? Your god's an idiot. Either that, or you are.
@PatchesRips There have always at all times been Christians, even in the Old Testament. Not everyone followed the teachings of the catholic church, there have always been people who truly believed and were persecuted for their faith. Persecution is part of being a Christian. Until today Christianity is the most persecuted religion. See China, North Korea and muslim countries.
@Bergkristall "There have always at all times been Christians, even in the Old Testament."
That's absurd. The people of the Old Testament were Jews and believed the same things Jews believe today. If you're correct, then Jews are Christians, and there's no need to believe in Christ to be a "Christian", because the people prior to his ministry certainly didn't. If they were already "Christian", what did we NEED him to show up for in the FIRST place?
@PatchesRips Christians are defined as being saved through grace through faith, not by works. Abraham and several other OT-people were true believers and therefore Christ died for them, too. They basically got a credit in advance that was finally paid when Jesus died on the cross. Pls go and by yourself some theology book from John McArthur, i don't have time to explain all details to you.
@Bergkristall "Christians are defined as being saved through grace through faith, not by works."
Some Christians define it that way. Others don't. And they have scripture on their side, too. That's the Bible for you; the Big Book of Fill-In-the-Blank.
"Abraham and several other OT-people were true believers"
Well, then Jesus died for the Jews that came AFTER him, too, because they believe the same things he did, so again I ask: what did we need Jesus for?
@Bergkristall "They basically got a credit in advance"
So where does the Bible say that? Or let me guess... it doesn't; you're just ad libbing to stitch the big gaping hole in the plot of your fairy tale.
"theology book from John McArthur"
Again with the later sources. Why was your god so spectacularly bad that 2000 years on, he still needs moral men to tell other mortal men what the perfect creator of the universe couldn't manage to get across, even showing up in person?
@Bergkristall "Not everyone followed the teachings of the catholic church, there have always been people who truly believed and were persecuted for their faith."
Such as? Name us a Protestant hero of the 12th century. Or the 10th. Or the 8th. Or the 4th. Just who do you purport to have been these "real" Christians keeping the faith alive for 1500 years, and why would your god allow the vast majority of his self-professed flock to wallow in error and damnation all that time?
@Bergkristall "Until today Christianity is the most persecuted religion"
Oh, yeah, those six million Christians who died at the hands of the Jews 70 years ago in the Holocaust because they accepted Jesus, whoa. You really gotta feel for those people, huh?
@Bergkristall Further, was your god lying when he inspired James to enter into scripture, "Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead"? What difference does it make in the world if you believe that stuff your god said, but you don't act on it? Why should you go to heaven if you're a hypocrite?
@PatchesRips If you are a true believer you will automatically show frutis of repentance and faith,aka good works. The Holy Spirit changes your heart towards sanctification little by little. Read the 1689 baptist confession of faith, everything explained there. Well, I guess there would not be so many atheists if churches would only teach solid calvinist doctrine and not this arminian garbage that you seem to have been brought up with. .
@Bergkristall "If you are a true believer you will automatically show frutis of repentance and faith,aka good works."
Then in other words, good works ARE a necessary adjunct of salvation, because you yourself have just insisted that they are the hallmark of a "true" Christian: anyone who does not exhibit good works is not a "true" Christian and is not saved. This is essentially a Catholic view on the matter.
@Bergkristall "Read the 1689 baptist confession of faith, everything explained there."
So it wasn't "explained" when God was actually walking around on Earth, no... it was "explained" 17 centuries later and thousands of miles away. So after your god blew the delivery of the most important message ever, just what was he doing for 1700 years before he finally got around to having someone tighten the bolts down on his otherwise rickety message?
@Bergkristall "You were never a true believer because true believers persevere to the end"
If they weren't true believers, it's because the Holy Ghost dropped the ball. It's your god's job to instill the gift of faith--even I know that much.
@PatchesRips Let's agree that Dusty and all of you atheists are none of Gods chosen ones if you die unsaved. Tough luck then. After all He is a souvereign God.
@Bergkristall "Let's agree that Dusty and all of you atheists are none of Gods chosen ones"
If your god "chooses" who is saved and who is not, then the fault doesn't lie with me, but with your god. He conceived of me and my every deed and thought long before I existed, knew (and, if you're correct, CHOSE) my fate before my first breath, and then created me to act out his plan. The evil is therefore his, not mine. I am simply the instrument of his will; he's a malicious monster.
As a Catholic, I can put aside my differences with this atheist douchebag to join him in a laugh at the ridiculousness of Jack Chick comic books that silly fundamentalists pass around.
So Jesus couldn't be bothered to stop the kid when he was walking down the side walk and say. "Hey kid I wouldn't go in there I happen to now the future and that's not a place you want to be going." Seems like to little to late.
hahahaha ...I laughed at the last words to the story :) then the angel takes him to heaven where the other angels can rape him ..lol epic ending ty lol
LOL That was hilarious! I haven't seen a chick tract in a while. They usually make me laugh, but, it really pissed me off when some assholes put them in my daughter's Halloween bag a few years ago. If you look at the Chick tract website they encourage people to do it.
"DUDE, DO DRUGS!" "DRUGS! I'M NOT DOING DRUGS!" "DO IT MAN, DO DRUGS!" "YAY YOU DID DRUGS!" "DRUGS! DON'T DO DRUGS!" "DUDE, SELL DRUGS!" "YA, I'M AWESOME AT SELLING DRUGS!" "I GOT A PRESENT FOR YOU, BETTER DRUGS!" "DUDE, I'LL SUCK YOUR DICK FOR SOME DRUGS!" "PSYCH! I'M NOT A DICK-SUCKING BIKER, I'M A COP MOTHERFUCKER!" "FUCK YOU MAN, YOU SOLD DRUGS! YOU'RE GOING TO PRISON!" "I WANT TO RAPE HIM FIRST!" "NO ME FIRST!" "Eh, I'll rape you eventually." "SAVE ME JESUS!""FUCK YA, YOU'RE SAVED AS SHIT!"
I haven't seen one of those things in over 30 years, yet I still remember "This was your life." It scared the shit out of me. We lived in a poor neighborhood in California, and gangs were prevalent, so we were annually subjected to the film "The cross and the switchblade" - anyone remember that tripe?
Yah, when I was a Christian I used to give out Chick Tracts, too. In retrospect... that was really annoying. LOL
My favorite was a full sized Chick comic book in full color. I don't remember what it was about, but I remember there was a picture of the Orion Nebula and Jack Chick labeled it the most beautiful place in the Universe and suggested that it was the entrance to Heaven. I was influenced by that image and now I favor Astrophysics over Creatardism.
Man, my ex wife's schizophrenic brother used to collect these damn things whenever his meds would stop working... I could always tell when it was that the doctors needed to change his meds, cause these things would start popping up all over his apartment.
That, and he'd start showing his duct taped dong to everyone...
A really passive aggressive evangelist used to hide these on shelves when I worked at Borders. I'd keep them whenever I found them. I have a small collection that I occasionally bring out for a good laugh.
so according to this chick trace, i have a voice.... i deep voice that will effect the rest of my life...... avoid shady fingers calling me into alleys or die of AIDS and get raped by angels....
Watching child porn? Shit, if big G is everywhere, he's watching hundreds of little kids getting raped, beaten, and fuck knows what else in real time, right now!
The other awesome Chick parody is, of course, "Who Will Be Eaten First?" at rubbersuitstudios [dot] com [slash] ptcct [dot] htm.
That was hysterical. Fortunately for me, I was in the Assembly of God churches back in my evangelical days, and we didn’t care much for Chick. I never thought to apologize to everyone I ever handed a tract to. So, to everyone I ever handed a tract, I’m sorry. And current evangelicals—when you can give a satisfying explanation for why serial killer Ted Bundy got to go to heaven if even one of his victims is in hell, then you may have five of my minutes to preach to me.
@Cathmoytura That's actually an excellant point. Jeffrey Dahmer apparently became a devout Christian while in prison. He was killed coming back from church services. I guess he's in heaven according to christian theology. A man who poured acid in people's heads while they were still conscious, eventually killed them, raped them and ate them.........But an atheist who helps the homeless get's to burn in hell for not being Yahweh's cheerleader. And that's perfect justice?
@Newenlightenmentnow Ted Bundy's last-minute profession of faith was an early part of me questioning my way out of evangelicalism. I live in Florida, where it was really big news in churches. While others were celebrating his midnight salvation, I inwardly recoiled at the implications. I spent three years trying to justify the doctrines that allowed him to go to heaven while presumably most of his victims went to hell, possibly including a 12-year-old, and finally admitted I couldn't.
@Cathmoytura Why would anyone celebrate that. I mean given the nature of the man's offenses, wouldn't it be better just to remain poker faced? God these people have no tact.The whole doctrine of salvation by faith, vicarious redemption is just disgustingly immoral.
@Cathmoytura There are Christians who doubt that gays will ever get to heaven because they are reprobates. Ted Bundy was gay. Read Romans 1 for clarification.
@Bergkristall This is the first time I've ever heard the allegation that Bundy was gay, and I seriously doubt it. I live in Florida where he was headlines for years, and I've written news stories about serial killers, including Bundy. Not once have I ever heard this one, and it looks like a recent politically-motivated invention. I'm familiar with Romans 1, and note the fact no one preaching from it ever moves onto Romans 2:1, which says judging behaviors is tantamount to doing them.
Actually, if god is omnipresent, then not only is he watching child porn, but his omnipresent dick is inside of everyone, children included. I just grossed myself out, oh well, good thing it's impossible to be omni-anything
The chick tracts on Mormonism and D&D are hilarious. I remember getting the D&D one from some lunatic preacher on campus and laughing for weeks because the Christian that "rescues" the girl from D&D looked 1000x more molesty then any of the people she played D&D with. What's fucking amazing to me is that there's apparently people out there who put money towards these things thinking they send some sort of serious message
@tehrandy Want to have some fun? Google "Who's your daddy" chick parody....It's a great parody of the absurd chick "big daddy" (an anti-evolution track with so much bullshit in you'd almost think it was written to make Christians look bad.
I used to hand out tracts as one of jehovah's witnesses. I've come a long way baby! From one cult to another, eh dusty? LOL....just kidding. Your cult is much cooler ;)
I was once drawn into religion. I was young...I cringe every time I recall this annoying, wide-eyed half-wit, laying turds of nonsense on my friends... How they held back from slapping sense into me I'll never know.
dem aids
Driscotus 14 hours ago
One christian gave me one of those. It was about a stupid story about a sick guy who rejected a doctor's cure because he thought there was nothing wrong with him and he died, and the doctor cried.
It was just as stupid as this one. Because there really IS nothing wrong with us.
Lathox 2 days ago
My daughter got one of those for Halloween in her basket. I almost went back to the woman's house to throw it at her. Ugh.
ApollonApostle 3 days ago in playlist Uploaded videos
I loved those when I was a little brainwashed child. Would grab them from church ALL the time. So glad i got rid of that shit. I remember grabbing one so I knew what to say when I was praying to be "saved" so I did it right. Haha. Then I got older and real life hit and I realized how stupid all this shit was.
FightForTheArts 6 days ago
did you run out of stuff to talk about point at stuff and describe it to me please more more MORE!
LuckyMobius 1 week ago
They should have edited the story and said that Jesus cured the guy of AIDS with his almighty healing power.
slesperado 1 week ago
That was the best story ever! lol
I keep finding those things in bus stops and phone booths, so I've stared a collection. Some of them are pretty fucked up.
BDotBoom 2 weeks ago
If we're all Gods children,
isn't all porn child porn for him ?
Xigano1 2 weeks ago
One hundred and seventy , eighty years. Yep that sounds like a Christianity view. like everyone that thinks 2012 is the end of days. but did you think that the calendar is knot perfect ,. Give or take maybe 400 years . either way, so are we living in 2412 or 1612 .. YOU PROVE ME WRONG --- go on do it !!!!!!!
tranismybitch 2 weeks ago
I wish it really was this easy to score! lol. j/k
proud2bpagan 3 weeks ago
I was a Christian until I was 11.
flamingacdc1 3 weeks ago
@flamingacdc1 I feel you there bro, by the time I turned 12 I was completely certain it was complete shit.
S1lv3rblad3 6 days ago
Is it just me, or is the illustrator of that comic a cat person? I'm not surprised.
filmdumb 3 weeks ago
This video made me want to do drugs! I guess I will smoke some pot, which I grew and did not get raped for. Remember the ads that told us that buying pot contributed to terrorism? This is why I grow MMJ. If some day a cop asks me why I am growing pot I will tell him to fight terrorism!
larsonb33 3 weeks ago
i love how the angels always have blonde hair and blue eyes shit no wonder hitler was a catholic
crh2010 3 weeks ago
Dusty: In the name of Richard Dawkins, I absolve you my son. For you are fucking hilarious! Thanks for the great videos.
CletisVanDam1 3 weeks ago
"According to this thermometer, you got raped by a bunch of dudes last night." I fucking lol'd
phenomenon91 3 weeks ago
If God is everywhere, then God is also in hell. Nice.
SubconsciousGatherer 3 weeks ago 14
@SubconsciousGatherer Yeah, you are absolutely right. Unbelievers will be tortured in hell in the presence of the lamb, i.e. Jesus.
Bergkristall 3 weeks ago
this was funny as all fuck!!
wickedclowncop80 4 weeks ago
I like that, "If god is every where at once, does that mean that he is watching child porn right now?"
beadheadbrassie 4 weeks ago 25
Omfg I laughed my ass off through the whole thing. You should definitely consider doing more of these. Funniest shit ever.
omgitsrook 1 month ago
dustin u need to do more of this XD
darckjo 1 month ago
In Jack Chick's world, EVERY Homosexual encounter results in AIDS - even if they are both virgins - and you always seem to die in a week. You can blast worn-out crack whores in every hole in their body, completely unprotected, and be fine... but one penis in your butt and BOOM! Super AIDS, motherfucker!
Methinks Mr. Chick was obsessed much over man-on-man buttsechs...
CrudOMatic 1 month ago
i use to be a big fan of these tracts, i guess for the same reason people like horror movies - sometimes it's fun to be scared shitless. the unfortunate thing is, when you're a fundy kid like i was, these things weren't idiotic fiction, they were real and they did very real psychological damage to impressionable young minds. laughing my arse off at this stuff now is like therapy for me.
owen652 1 month ago
You need to read more of those. That was hilarious.
zero92828 1 month ago
i noticed the position that he's in at 6:07 in the second scene. didnt he learn his lesson last time.
PlantMan041 1 month ago
according to this thermometer, you got raped by a bunch of dudes last night
Category120 1 month ago
1. You were never a true believer because true believers persevere to the end (Matt 24:13)
2. @thegorn68 Catholics are not christians either. They believe in works salvation, which is no salvation.
3. I think that Chick tracts are great evangelism tools. I also pass them out wherever I go.
4. I encourage every one to watch "Know Your Enemy" by Fuel Project on YT.
Bergkristall 1 month ago
@Bergkristall "Catholics are not christians either."
So there were no Christians after Jesus had Peter establish his church, for 1500 years, till Luther showed up? Well, if Jesus was THAT bad at his job, why didn't your god do the right thing and just send LUTHER down so that 60 generations of Christians wouldn't die and go to hell for not being "real" Christians? Your god's an idiot. Either that, or you are.
PatchesRips 1 month ago
@PatchesRips There have always at all times been Christians, even in the Old Testament. Not everyone followed the teachings of the catholic church, there have always been people who truly believed and were persecuted for their faith. Persecution is part of being a Christian. Until today Christianity is the most persecuted religion. See China, North Korea and muslim countries.
Bergkristall 3 weeks ago
@Bergkristall "There have always at all times been Christians, even in the Old Testament."
That's absurd. The people of the Old Testament were Jews and believed the same things Jews believe today. If you're correct, then Jews are Christians, and there's no need to believe in Christ to be a "Christian", because the people prior to his ministry certainly didn't. If they were already "Christian", what did we NEED him to show up for in the FIRST place?
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
@PatchesRips Christians are defined as being saved through grace through faith, not by works. Abraham and several other OT-people were true believers and therefore Christ died for them, too. They basically got a credit in advance that was finally paid when Jesus died on the cross. Pls go and by yourself some theology book from John McArthur, i don't have time to explain all details to you.
Bergkristall 3 weeks ago
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@Bergkristall "Christians are defined as being saved through grace through faith, not by works."
Some Christians define it that way. Others don't. And they have scripture on their side, too. That's the Bible for you; the Big Book of Fill-In-the-Blank.
"Abraham and several other OT-people were true believers"
Well, then Jesus died for the Jews that came AFTER him, too, because they believe the same things he did, so again I ask: what did we need Jesus for?
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
@Bergkristall "They basically got a credit in advance"
So where does the Bible say that? Or let me guess... it doesn't; you're just ad libbing to stitch the big gaping hole in the plot of your fairy tale.
"theology book from John McArthur"
Again with the later sources. Why was your god so spectacularly bad that 2000 years on, he still needs moral men to tell other mortal men what the perfect creator of the universe couldn't manage to get across, even showing up in person?
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
@Bergkristall "Not everyone followed the teachings of the catholic church, there have always been people who truly believed and were persecuted for their faith."
Such as? Name us a Protestant hero of the 12th century. Or the 10th. Or the 8th. Or the 4th. Just who do you purport to have been these "real" Christians keeping the faith alive for 1500 years, and why would your god allow the vast majority of his self-professed flock to wallow in error and damnation all that time?
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
@Bergkristall "Until today Christianity is the most persecuted religion"
Oh, yeah, those six million Christians who died at the hands of the Jews 70 years ago in the Holocaust because they accepted Jesus, whoa. You really gotta feel for those people, huh?
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
@Bergkristall Further, was your god lying when he inspired James to enter into scripture, "Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead"? What difference does it make in the world if you believe that stuff your god said, but you don't act on it? Why should you go to heaven if you're a hypocrite?
PatchesRips 1 month ago
@PatchesRips If you are a true believer you will automatically show frutis of repentance and faith,aka good works. The Holy Spirit changes your heart towards sanctification little by little. Read the 1689 baptist confession of faith, everything explained there. Well, I guess there would not be so many atheists if churches would only teach solid calvinist doctrine and not this arminian garbage that you seem to have been brought up with. .
Bergkristall 3 weeks ago
@Bergkristall "If you are a true believer you will automatically show frutis of repentance and faith,aka good works."
Then in other words, good works ARE a necessary adjunct of salvation, because you yourself have just insisted that they are the hallmark of a "true" Christian: anyone who does not exhibit good works is not a "true" Christian and is not saved. This is essentially a Catholic view on the matter.
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
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@Bergkristall "Well, I guess there would not be so many atheists if churches would only teach solid calvinist doctrine"
There'd be fewer atheists if your god, or ANY god, were demonstrably real. If I were convinced they were, I wouldn't be an atheist.
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
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@Bergkristall "Read the 1689 baptist confession of faith, everything explained there."
So it wasn't "explained" when God was actually walking around on Earth, no... it was "explained" 17 centuries later and thousands of miles away. So after your god blew the delivery of the most important message ever, just what was he doing for 1700 years before he finally got around to having someone tighten the bolts down on his otherwise rickety message?
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
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@Bergkristall "I think that Chick tracts are great evangelism tools."
The REAL evangelical tools are people who hand out Chick tracts.
PatchesRips 1 month ago
@Bergkristall "You were never a true believer because true believers persevere to the end"
If they weren't true believers, it's because the Holy Ghost dropped the ball. It's your god's job to instill the gift of faith--even I know that much.
PatchesRips 1 month ago
@PatchesRips Let's agree that Dusty and all of you atheists are none of Gods chosen ones if you die unsaved. Tough luck then. After all He is a souvereign God.
Bergkristall 3 weeks ago
@Bergkristall "Let's agree that Dusty and all of you atheists are none of Gods chosen ones"
If your god "chooses" who is saved and who is not, then the fault doesn't lie with me, but with your god. He conceived of me and my every deed and thought long before I existed, knew (and, if you're correct, CHOSE) my fate before my first breath, and then created me to act out his plan. The evil is therefore his, not mine. I am simply the instrument of his will; he's a malicious monster.
PatchesRips 3 weeks ago
@Bergkristall "1. You were never a true believer because true believers persevere to the end (Matt 24:13)"
That "end" was shortly after Jesus's death Matthew 24:34 on a flat Earth Matthew 4:8.
johnrainrules 1 month ago
The slippery slope fallacy, appeal to fear, and appeal to emotion.
naejimba 1 month ago
As a Catholic, I can put aside my differences with this atheist douchebag to join him in a laugh at the ridiculousness of Jack Chick comic books that silly fundamentalists pass around.
thegorn68 1 month ago
You were never a Christian.
warriorspikes51 1 month ago
a cop puts a gun to an unarmed little boy's face. "occupy this"
PlantMan041 1 month ago
I wanna be the 1st one to RAPE YOU!
ghettot419king 1 month ago
Hey Dusty! I know you're probably not into politics but i kinda wonder what your presidential preferences are. Come on...don't be shy.
norrad111 1 month ago
I guess there's a such thing as red neck atheists.
DebateRobo 1 month ago
Moral of the story: you better have some good fucking stories BEFORE submitting to god, if that's your thing.
thatsmrheretic 1 month ago
"Fuck yeah you're saved as shit." Damn you know your theology.
SamWiseGingy 1 month ago
Hilarious!! Brilliant!! TewRealFer 21stCenturyReligiousFaithBelievers!! hehehe!!
warwithangels 1 month ago
I always throw them away.
TheSatan222 1 month ago
<--- laughing my head off!!!!! WTG!
terryliciareed 1 month ago
... I wanna see the cosmos like Carl Sagan :(
xxxrobert123xxx 1 month ago
So Jesus couldn't be bothered to stop the kid when he was walking down the side walk and say. "Hey kid I wouldn't go in there I happen to now the future and that's not a place you want to be going." Seems like to little to late.
Richardisdorky 1 month ago
Wow! Contracting AIDS and dying in about a week?!? Must be that Super AIDS that's resistant to medication!
RadarKat73080 1 month ago
hahahaha ...I laughed at the last words to the story :) then the angel takes him to heaven where the other angels can rape him ..lol epic ending ty lol
RichMrRichie 1 month ago
OMFG the peace sign!
jenofdesoto 1 month ago in playlist More videos from CultOfDusty
Why did I click this again? I was watching funny adverts 5 mins ago O_O
mAnclTy 1 month ago
Poop
MrLavaBeast1 1 month ago
-#%-+*****3
Charlottetheharlot84 1 month ago
god.... is pedo bear? IT ALL MAKES SINCE NOW!
bigbadronin 1 month ago
The "Sex Robot" shirt is priceless :)
zaneacademy 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos
I like Dusty!
goldenhopper 1 month ago
dusty you really need to do "this was your life" i freakin loved that one
romad20000 1 month ago
Dusty you say some of the most wittiest stupid shit in a good way.. LOL!!!
LVize 1 month ago
Dusty makes everything funnier
TheMiracleHands 1 month ago
LOL That was hilarious! I haven't seen a chick tract in a while. They usually make me laugh, but, it really pissed me off when some assholes put them in my daughter's Halloween bag a few years ago. If you look at the Chick tract website they encourage people to do it.
ScaperSteph 1 month ago
@ScaperSteph
omg wow, what assholes
isaiahismuhnigga 1 month ago
what the fuck am i seeing right now?
MrFishAssassin 1 month ago
"Nobody can save you from reality" - Drugs can.
ANameIsChosen 1 month ago
Well if that dude is being raped by hot ass lady angels then I envy him at that point.
NetraAmorosi 1 month ago
@NetraAmorosi Then it wouldn't be rape.
fds9931 1 month ago
@fds9931 Well it would be if he for some reason didn't want to have sex with them. Though I know I wouldn't resist.
NetraAmorosi 1 month ago
"DUDE, DO DRUGS!" "DRUGS! I'M NOT DOING DRUGS!" "DO IT MAN, DO DRUGS!" "YAY YOU DID DRUGS!" "DRUGS! DON'T DO DRUGS!" "DUDE, SELL DRUGS!" "YA, I'M AWESOME AT SELLING DRUGS!" "I GOT A PRESENT FOR YOU, BETTER DRUGS!" "DUDE, I'LL SUCK YOUR DICK FOR SOME DRUGS!" "PSYCH! I'M NOT A DICK-SUCKING BIKER, I'M A COP MOTHERFUCKER!" "FUCK YOU MAN, YOU SOLD DRUGS! YOU'RE GOING TO PRISON!" "I WANT TO RAPE HIM FIRST!" "NO ME FIRST!" "Eh, I'll rape you eventually." "SAVE ME JESUS!""FUCK YA, YOU'RE SAVED AS SHIT!"
dksilentbob 1 month ago
"Stop it. You're hurting me. Guards, help me. Stop."
That's some mild prison rape. Maybe it was the patient guy gettin' some.
USMarineSgt 1 month ago
LoL why the hell do they call it a chick tract?
Madkevin88 1 month ago
does anyone else notice how much wait dusty has been losing? :o
BryceeTB 1 month ago
please do another ^^
SoetSout 1 month ago in playlist Uploaded videos
I am not familiar of chick tracks, it never reached my country,
So this is my first time to actually hear one, and I can't stop laughing!
got more?
emancoy 1 month ago 12
You ought to read the D&D one called "Dark Dungeons". For anyone who's into roleplaying games, it's freakin' hilarious.
ladytremere85 1 month ago
The ad before this me was an "I'm a Mormon!" ad. Ironic.
ziggyprime 1 month ago
Awesome
albaelsanto 1 month ago
I used to read them for fun - some interesting stories!
andrewh817 1 month ago
"Seeing the Cosmos like Carl F*cking Sagan!!"
Hilarious!! xD
NacidoAteo 1 month ago
"DUDE! I'll suck your dick if you give me some more drugs!"
Laughed my ass off several times during this video. Please, Dusty, do more loud readings of Chick Tracts, it's hilarious!
Owminator 1 month ago in playlist More videos from CultOfDusty
"Fuck yeah! I'm *awesome* at selling drugs!"
bowlsallbroken 1 month ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Love this! Lol
Rizen4201 1 month ago
Eh... I'll Rape You Eventually
ssohood2011 1 month ago 20
I haven't seen one of those things in over 30 years, yet I still remember "This was your life." It scared the shit out of me. We lived in a poor neighborhood in California, and gangs were prevalent, so we were annually subjected to the film "The cross and the switchblade" - anyone remember that tripe?
DeltaVictorMike 1 month ago
>_< i keep getting confused between your pointer and mine
dlf619 1 month ago
"...because nothing says Satan like "peace". Hahahaha 8^D
warren52nz 1 month ago
"According to this thermometer, you got raped by a bunch of dudes last night!" LMFAO
mim0sabones 1 month ago
My favorite is Dark Dungeons or whatever the anti-D&D one was called... where they talk about how people learn the REAL spells...
TheOJDrinker 1 month ago 2
Lol - the Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament is evil and satanic.
jazzx251 1 month ago
behind the fence right before he does drugs, the person with the skull on his back also has a gun on his side. Dont worry Dusty, I caught it for you!
ReligiousUnderdog 1 month ago
Very well done. I love it when you cook these things up.
TheSaturnalia 1 month ago
Reading Chick Tracts made me leave Christianity.
teddygomi 1 month ago
Great job as ever facebook/antitheists
UKantitheist1 1 month ago
LOL. I'll rape him eventually.ha ha ha
SpinozasPsyche 1 month ago
This was hilarious
SpinozasPsyche 1 month ago
You're a Star.
Who needs tv, when Dusty Smith is on youtube?
ParaParagon 1 month ago
Yah, when I was a Christian I used to give out Chick Tracts, too. In retrospect... that was really annoying. LOL
My favorite was a full sized Chick comic book in full color. I don't remember what it was about, but I remember there was a picture of the Orion Nebula and Jack Chick labeled it the most beautiful place in the Universe and suggested that it was the entrance to Heaven. I was influenced by that image and now I favor Astrophysics over Creatardism.
xephyr1000 1 month ago
@xephyr1000
So these comics were made by one Jack Chick. Hence the title.
I must say he's a very good artist; this crap is very well drawn with some nice touches. There's plenty to talk about in each frame.
Lol - shame about the ending.
jazzx251 1 month ago
MORAL OF THE STORY:
If you don't sin, Jesus died for nothing.
xephyr1000 1 month ago 27
Dusty,
Those idiotic Mormon ads are popping up on your videos all the time, just so you know.
YourDogIsDeadHAHA 1 month ago
The only one I've read is the D&D one and it was pretty bad
Alakrit 1 month ago
I remember getting this one as a teenager.
Then as now...the rat was my favorite part ;-)
Tiptoetherat 1 month ago
"According to this thermometer, you got raped last night!"
TasteThePainbow88 1 month ago
Dusty, you rock!! One of your best yet!! Thanks man!
iversonmatthew 1 month ago
do more
MORE!
Who needs drugs, I haz Dusty!
Xgya2000 1 month ago
DUSTY VS KEN HAM PLEASE DUSTY DO ONE ON THIS GUY!!!
toolarmysniper 1 month ago
You gotta do more of these!! That was hilarious!!
themendezes 1 month ago
"My bad!" lol
SipterJust 1 month ago
That was fucking hilarious dude.
theatheistparade 1 month ago
Man, my ex wife's schizophrenic brother used to collect these damn things whenever his meds would stop working... I could always tell when it was that the doctors needed to change his meds, cause these things would start popping up all over his apartment.
That, and he'd start showing his duct taped dong to everyone...
schachtelw 1 month ago 3
A really passive aggressive evangelist used to hide these on shelves when I worked at Borders. I'd keep them whenever I found them. I have a small collection that I occasionally bring out for a good laugh.
fedos 1 month ago
AWESOME video. Hilarious!
GodVlogger 1 month ago
THAT WAS HILARIOUS
isaiahismuhnigga 1 month ago
LMFAO!!!!! Now that is fuckin funny shit!!! I'm still laughing! XD
DeathBYDesign666 1 month ago 2
so according to this chick trace, i have a voice.... i deep voice that will effect the rest of my life...... avoid shady fingers calling me into alleys or die of AIDS and get raped by angels....
fuck fingers son
dummy1616 1 month ago
Watching child porn? Shit, if big G is everywhere, he's watching hundreds of little kids getting raped, beaten, and fuck knows what else in real time, right now!
The other awesome Chick parody is, of course, "Who Will Be Eaten First?" at rubbersuitstudios [dot] com [slash] ptcct [dot] htm.
DuhIdiot1 1 month ago
Loved it Dusty -Jack
xShadowSniper22 1 month ago
"Nothing says Satan like peace!" LOL Brilliant!
uglyandbad 1 month ago
That's some magical thermometer that doctor had! The moral: you can sell drugs and get high and then go to heaven all smiling and shit.
voyzovrezon 1 month ago
That was hysterical. Fortunately for me, I was in the Assembly of God churches back in my evangelical days, and we didn’t care much for Chick. I never thought to apologize to everyone I ever handed a tract to. So, to everyone I ever handed a tract, I’m sorry. And current evangelicals—when you can give a satisfying explanation for why serial killer Ted Bundy got to go to heaven if even one of his victims is in hell, then you may have five of my minutes to preach to me.
Cathmoytura 1 month ago
@Cathmoytura That's actually an excellant point. Jeffrey Dahmer apparently became a devout Christian while in prison. He was killed coming back from church services. I guess he's in heaven according to christian theology. A man who poured acid in people's heads while they were still conscious, eventually killed them, raped them and ate them.........But an atheist who helps the homeless get's to burn in hell for not being Yahweh's cheerleader. And that's perfect justice?
Newenlightenmentnow 1 month ago
@Newenlightenmentnow Ted Bundy's last-minute profession of faith was an early part of me questioning my way out of evangelicalism. I live in Florida, where it was really big news in churches. While others were celebrating his midnight salvation, I inwardly recoiled at the implications. I spent three years trying to justify the doctrines that allowed him to go to heaven while presumably most of his victims went to hell, possibly including a 12-year-old, and finally admitted I couldn't.
Cathmoytura 1 month ago
@Cathmoytura Why would anyone celebrate that. I mean given the nature of the man's offenses, wouldn't it be better just to remain poker faced? God these people have no tact.The whole doctrine of salvation by faith, vicarious redemption is just disgustingly immoral.
Newenlightenmentnow 1 month ago
@Cathmoytura There are Christians who doubt that gays will ever get to heaven because they are reprobates. Ted Bundy was gay. Read Romans 1 for clarification.
Bergkristall 1 month ago
@Bergkristall This is the first time I've ever heard the allegation that Bundy was gay, and I seriously doubt it. I live in Florida where he was headlines for years, and I've written news stories about serial killers, including Bundy. Not once have I ever heard this one, and it looks like a recent politically-motivated invention. I'm familiar with Romans 1, and note the fact no one preaching from it ever moves onto Romans 2:1, which says judging behaviors is tantamount to doing them.
Cathmoytura 1 month ago
@Bergkristall "Ted Bundy was gay. Read Romans 1 for clarification."
Romans 1 says Ted Bundy was gay? Which book in the Bible tells us about Ted Haggard? :)
PatchesRips 1 month ago
The moral is even if you steal shit, you can still get into Heaven.
DrShaym 1 month ago
Actually, if god is omnipresent, then not only is he watching child porn, but his omnipresent dick is inside of everyone, children included. I just grossed myself out, oh well, good thing it's impossible to be omni-anything
GurrenPrime 1 month ago
There's a review of Chick Tracts on Bad Webcomics Wiki.
badwebcomics.wikidot [DOT] com/jack-chick-tracts
DrShaym 1 month ago
PEACE IS SATANIC!!!
dksilentbob 1 month ago
Jesus didn't save that guy. Legalisation could have though!
hippydude89 1 month ago
The chick tracts on Mormonism and D&D are hilarious. I remember getting the D&D one from some lunatic preacher on campus and laughing for weeks because the Christian that "rescues" the girl from D&D looked 1000x more molesty then any of the people she played D&D with. What's fucking amazing to me is that there's apparently people out there who put money towards these things thinking they send some sort of serious message
tehrandy 1 month ago
@tehrandy Want to have some fun? Google "Who's your daddy" chick parody....It's a great parody of the absurd chick "big daddy" (an anti-evolution track with so much bullshit in you'd almost think it was written to make Christians look bad.
Newenlightenmentnow 1 month ago
I get these things in my store all the time. That's not even the most fucked up one I've seen.
sfm073 1 month ago
hahaha Fucking awesome!
pololopo23 1 month ago
yor gay
commitmentissues 1 month ago
When someone offers you drugs... thank them, because drugs are expensive :D
craigore2011 1 month ago
This was a masterpiece.
MissThinkabunch 1 month ago
Holy crap! Dusty, you really used to hand out Chick tracts? You must have gotten laughed at a lot.
YY4Me133 1 month ago
I used to hand out tracts as one of jehovah's witnesses. I've come a long way baby! From one cult to another, eh dusty? LOL....just kidding. Your cult is much cooler ;)
bbykns2 1 month ago 19
@bbykns2
jahovah's witnesses do not pass those out moron
isaiahismuhnigga 1 month ago
0_0 I never knew about these. Churches make comics about rape...how odd.
8milestocandy 1 month ago
Lol. The best part is- There's a kid with an Uzi shooting right over his fucking head.but this dude, he don't give a fuck
siddharthjoshi91 1 month ago
MUCH better than your other vids. More of the same plx.
SelfImmolator 1 month ago
this was the best video ive seen in a while?
bloodyhawk989 1 month ago
I was once drawn into religion. I was young...I cringe every time I recall this annoying, wide-eyed half-wit, laying turds of nonsense on my friends... How they held back from slapping sense into me I'll never know.
rogan71 1 month ago
hahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Effing subbed!
bassguyjwb 1 month ago
Holy shit....hillarious...."my bad"
serenityMMM 1 month ago
digging that sex robot shirt... WKUK for the wiinnn
heistmonkey0074 1 month ago
Best fucking story EVER.....
wretchedSTONER 1 month ago
Lol, outstanding.
mikefromwa 1 month ago
Wow, I'm surprised. You just did the Lord's work and didn't even realize it. If people disregard the mindless banter at the end.
TheNorem 1 month ago
@TheNorem stop being a faggot. religion is for the gays.
Buck2120 1 month ago
@Buck2120 oh the irony..
heistmonkey0074 1 month ago
@TheNorem you're a drone dude
heistmonkey0074 1 month ago
That scared the shit outta me! I'M CONVERTED!!!!!
superduperjew 1 month ago
Many lulz in this one.
ONESPECIES 1 month ago
Yeah those things are fucking ridiculous, I destroy them when I find them.
LeftoverJedi 1 month ago
Where are the fucking chicks? I was LIED to!!
MrStillmans 1 month ago 20