Dating Coach Kat Coaches on Approaching Women

[aviomaster]

There is a reason man go to THAILAND....

[enzarto]

I think Coach Kat has a nice ring to it. I am in th e London area, and could use some coaching, I'm checking out the details on your website now.

[batzing]

There was nothing wrong with the video. Pickup lines are training wheels. It's better to be natural. They pointed out some good things here. Confident body language and building rapport. Lines aren't needed even in pickup. They are gimmicks. What you are really saying is what your body is saying. If your body language is confident... then the words won't matter.

[datingcoach]

Thanks for that. I love your line about pickup lines being training wheels. They can get you in the door, and maybe start a conversation, but eventually you're going to have to be real...

[yuutokun]

Don't trust women dating coaches.

[datingcoach]

well, my male clients are getting women - another just got engaged, another's moving in with hi GF in September - so I must be doing something right. ;-)

[Minkki82]

Great of you to try and help guys.

The thing with advice though is, if you're actively thinking about alot of things you've been told to do while interacting with someone, you WILL NOT COME ACROSS AS NORMAL.

[datingcoach]

Thanks for the kind words. Yes, it's true, if you're so worried about what you'll say, you may not come across well. It's important to try to relax with it, to build your confidence every chance you get, and to practise speaking to women as much as possible so that when you meet someone you want to click with, you'll feel much more comfortable and prepared. Everyone has to start somewhere!

Best wishes,

Coach Kat

[datingcoach]

I agree, you need to be able to attract a woman, but you don't need to only be able to "pick up" to date someone. You can try other methods as well - meeting and getting to know women through work, school, community, hobbies and interests, the way most people do. Trying all options is the best approach, and finding out what works best for you. That said, learning how to approach a stranger you're interested in is also a valuable skill.

[datingcoach]

I don't coach on seduction and pick-ups, I coach on the long game. No, I'm not an expert on pick-ups, and I don't try to be. Let the gurus do that. However, if a guy wants to build a GENUINE relationship with a woman, I can help him with that. I wouldn't have many successful clients and friends and a wonderful love life of my own if I didn't.

Kat

[Dojotigers]

I got your point but answer me this how are you gonna have long relationship if you don't pick a girl up first. You have to atract a women to you then you can build that relationship if you see her as a person you want to sticka round. How do you expect a person to hit a grandslam when they can't even get to first base?

[playingAround81]

I have heard this line a lot "you have got to challenge women". What does that mean? And, if you try to pick up women on the street, and they seem to be in a hurry, how do you challenge them?

[parad0xx86]

There are some huge problems with the second approach. First of all, he's got his hands in pockets which is a big sign of insecurity. Secondly he asks her if he can sit down; he is asking for her permission.WRONG! As if she owns the bar stool...lol :D And he introduces himself "Hi,I'm ..." Well,who cares! Women don't care who you are, they care about how you make them feel!!!

[datingcoach]

I won't disagree with you. Let's just say that I didn't script this and didn't have a lot of inpuit into it! I would deftly. recommend that when a guy approaches a woman, he should do so with his hands at his sides, head up, etc. And yes, he doesn't need to ask if he can sit, but he could ask if he can join her if he wants to connect with her right off the bat.

Thanks,

Kat

[Dojotigers]

Its is all about portraying confidence if you can do that everything else pretty much falls into place.

[datingcoach]

Yep, that's what I believe. It's not about perfect lines or gimmicks, it's about being comfortable in your own skin so you project confidence and you challenge her, rather than submitting & giving all your power over to her.

Thanks,

Kat

[Dojotigers]

haha as david deangelo would say i used to be one of you wussbags who couldn't even talk to a woman now i can talk anywoman i want and flirt with them and most of the time i can make a woman throw herself on me with just my bodylanguage and words

[datingcoach]

Hi Dojo, I'm curious to hear some of your specific tips and strategies, and I'm sure the guys are too. I'm also curious to know who your techniques work on - how old these women are, and where you're meeting them.

Thanks,

Kat

[Bobzeaux]

I read his e-book recently. It's basically nothing but stuffing a pair of mental tube socks down your pants.

[Dojotigers]

There is no specific tricks and strategies the main thing its all about cofidence and the ability to say what you want to say without having the fear of somebody thinking your weird. confidence works on any woman regardless of their age. Once you really "get it" then you will know what i'm talking about. You wanted specific tips. Okay lets do Body Language,when you walk into a room pull your shoulders back and your chest out and just move slower than usual. This portrays confidence.

[datingcoach]

I asked about techniques beacuse I thought you used some. I'm glad to hear that you don't! Gimmicks might attract attention, but then what? You can't base a reltp. on gimmicks. This is why I work so much on confidence and self-image with guys, so they don't need to rely on lines and plays.

Thanks,

Kat

[Dojotigers]

you can use lines and techniques and plays once you become good enough.

[Bobzeaux]

Meanwhile other sources tell you that men who walk FASTER appear more confident. Who's right?

[Dojotigers]

walk slow

[Bobzeaux]

That doesn't answer my question.

[RuNRi0TUK]

yes but do you get the Shag!

[n01ca22]

I have the look down cold pretty good looking cat! but If I walk in a club/bar and I see a group of ladys together thats when my nervousness comes to play i just dont know who to jump in and talk to who i want becuase I dont know them first and second I dont want to sound like a weirdo u know.. I dont wanna be the cat with a cheezy lame pick up like cuz its sounds fake and rehersd

[Marctr86]

David D has created a term for this behavior: Wussy.

This method is quite good... in becoming trapped in the so called "frienship zone". Listen to David D. if you don't really know what I'm talking about.

[noaim87]

search for IOI's on the net viperguy

[ViperGuy10]

How do you Know If a Girl Really Likes me For Sure?

[encryption]

flipskater. say exactly what you posted to the girl. just make light of the whole situation, and if she has any brains at all, she'll understand and probably like the approach.

[flipskater03158]

i got no problem with the confidence and stuff and making conversation, smiling etc. but how do i find an excuse to talk to her? like, it's strange to just have someone you've never seen in your whole life just randomly come up and say "hi". what's the hook as some would call it or excuse that tells them why the fuck you're there talking to them? thanks.

[ViperGuy10]

I agree, I can Never Find an excuse to talk to a hot girl!!

[datingcoach]

If they look very uncomfortable or look away, they're probably not interested in being approached. However, if they look neutral, give it a go and see what happens. The worst that can happen is that they don't get into conversation with you. Just don't approach them if they really do convey that they want to be left alone.

Best wishes,

Kat

[datingcoach]

Ok, this is a new one for me! If you really do seem to be 'scaring' women, then you need to change your body language and demeanor. Start by smiling, and adopting friendly, open, low-key body language. Try to make eye contact and let the women look you over before approaching.

[leonotron]

If you are looking for dating advice on a youtube comments page then there is good reason women are scard of you.

[tigertiger70]

lol! brilliant

[krabby4000]

i have no game.. im really shy infront of girls and i just don't have the guts to approach them and when i do my brain just shuts off and i cant think of a single thing to say.. is there any help for me??

[sauceyboy]

work on your confidence first, it's awful

[datingcoach]

Yes, there's definitely hope for you! As the guy above said, you need to start by working on your confidence. Your nerves are getting the best of you and causing you to freeze.

[datingcoach]

Start by building your confidence, building your conversation skills (practise with women you're not interested in dating), and use positive self-talk and relaxation techniques to help keep you going through the potential "freeze". Essentially, you need to have a plan to help overcome all of that. Coaching would help you - I have many male clients in the same boat who I've helped with lots of specific techniques.

Best wishes,

Kat

[Gameplayery]

i wanna know if my approche is good,

i play the macho kinda guy,i say things that might hurt,but are sarcastique and funny.For exemple,it call my freinds(girls) by the name, 'Women'-hey women,passe me that crayon.U understand =P?i kinda make them feel like a friend(boy).If she doesnt like that,then i immediatly appolagise.What d'u think?

[datingcoach]

Hi there,

This sounds similar to the material that comes from the PUA community. While a lot of that is designed to bed a woman that night rather than build a relationship with her, I can verify that this approach works to build rapport with many women.

[datingcoach]

I myself have experienced it. When a guy approaches a woman with a teasing manner, whether it's flirtatious or "busting her chops", as they call it, most women find it appealing. They like a playful approach, because it shows confidence, which women love. However, it has to be done with respect and tact, or it could just offend and alienate her.

[datingcoach]

Your approach would definitely work well with friends, but may not work on a woman you want to develop rapport with, as it it may be a bit too familiar at first.

All the best,

Kat

[datingcoach]

Let me just add to that - there's a very fine line between engaging or offending a woman. I still feel that it's important to be respectful and sincere initially, and you've built some rapport, before getting into teasing her. It's important for her to know you respect her and that the teasing is just a playful, flirtatious game you've got going between you. If you start off that way before you build some rapport, you run the risk of turning her off.

Kat

[Gameplayery]

your absolutly right,i ''tease'' her like you say,but when its time to get serious and respectful,i do it, if she wants =P

[tsabrams]

Listen to this woman. She knows the REAL game.

[datingcoach]

Thanks for your comment. This type of feedback I like! lol All kinds of approaches can work at different times in different settings, but projecting self-acceptance and confidence through warmth and humour seem to work best when approaching women with long-term intentions.

Happy dating,

Kat

[datingcoach]

From there you can advance to more eye contact, a smile, etc. and eventually come over and approach. The key is to always keep reading the woman's signals for red and green lights!

Best wishes,

Kateryna

[datingcoach]

Thanks for your comment! I agree, if that's done immediately after meeting a woman, yes, it could be interpreted as neediness. I think it's best to be a little cooler and hang back a bit before starting the approach, so as not look too eager. At the same time though, mirroring can start taking place in a very subtle way, from a distance, so that you start registering in the woman's subconscious in a way that's not overt.

[chabchaba]

when you meet a woman and try to signal to a her immediately that she is important to you by mirroring her that can be translated into: "Hey, I'm a needy clingy guy. I've just met you and you're important to me already. please love me in return"

[Bobzeaux]

Confidence: Just what the hell does that even mean? I am confident in who and what I am, I think I'm a great guy, I have few inhibitions about meeting people (I saw whatever's on my mind), but women still avoid me. And I've heard some women say that guys look cuter if they're obviously shy/nervous. My SISTER is head-over-heels in love with her first bf because he came across as a romantic klutz.

[datingcoach]

It sounds simplistic, but I believe that a positive attitude and positive expectations are the foundation of being well-received by others. (in addition to good interpersonal skills, the ability to read others, and the ability to develop rapport) We attract what we believe and project about ourselves. I've seen this with clients (and myself) over and over. Some of my clients were rejected repeatedly until they adjusted their core beliefs and practised genuine self-acceptance.

[datingcoach]

Hey there, thanks for your comments. To me, confidence is a positive belief in oneself, which is displayed in how we carry ourselves, how we relate to others, and very importantly, what we consciously and UNconsciously project to others, the foundation of which is how we EXPECT others to receive us. People can feel some confidence about themselves, but if they expect to be rejected, they probably will be, because they might be projecting things like anger, bitterness, tension, etc.

[datingcoach]

Ok, these are all out of order now, so start from the bottom!

As for your comment about your sister, many shy guys are sweet, endearing, and great listeners, and for that reason they appeal to a lot of women. Many women don't want or need alphas, and prefer them to guys who come across as really slick, arrogant, full of themselves, or who try too hard to impress.

[datingcoach]

I wouldn't know what could be stopping you from getting better results unless we spoke, but since I provide a free consultation, I'd be happy to speak with you if you're interested. I can be reached by phone or email.

Best wishes,

Kat

[sartware]

really useful for guys

[datingcoach]

Thanks. Guys need to relax and focus on just having a conversation with a woman. Some freak themselves out and get so nervous that they can hardly talk. I understand the shyness and nervousness, but their perspective needs to change. With some insight and coaching, my clients get those results.

Best wishes,

Kateryna

[snedethe1]

really nice,guys need to watch that!

[datingcoach]

Hi there, thanks for your feedback! What I'm trying to do is coach men on approaching women without gimmicks. Gimmicks can work at first, but without strong interpersonal skills to back it up, a woman will quickly lose interest. My message to guys: be yourself, and work on your confidence, conversation skills, and ability to connect with women. Far more effective than gimmicks!

Happy dating to all of you!

Kateryna