My Story ;; Self Harm

[ozlala82]

I have been a cutter for 15 years...it has been almost a year since I cut last. There have been many times in the past year I have wanted to do cut, but found other ways to release the pain. I am here to talk if you need someone. :) We need to realise we are never alone, and there are other people who are going through the same feelings and emotions. I have many scars....the one from my last cut is the worst and needed stitches. I look at it every day as a reminder of where I have come from.

[XPrincess30]

what does it mean when a video/photo is triggering?

[drak3isawesome]

@XPrincess30 it means that it will trigger a self harmer to cut or do watever it is they do to harm themselves

[FayeYasmine]

I haven't cut in a month but am starting to find it hard......

[andreasblog21]

@FayeYasmine i know how hard it is i cut for over 10yrs i am 20 now and i havent cut in like 6 months it's a very hard addiction to quit stay strong hun <3

[FayeYasmine]

@andreasblog21 I have cut for 2 years I'm trying to stay strong got counselling on Friday I hope I can handle it till then....... thank you for your support :)

[andreasblog21]

@FayeYasmine if u need someone to talk to message me <3

[alanacolleenpark]

people fucking hurt themselves, not other people, "oh my solution, i will cut myself, because people are hurting me", no, your fucking cutting yourself! dang, they chose to be like that, they want to be empty and alone, some people think it is cool, you stronger than you act, you can Handel everything perfectly fine, you just dont want to.

[AllyLovesArt]

I really agree with what you have wrote for this video! I used to self harm and have found the strength to stop which I am so thankful about but love to you all and hugs from Scotland. Take care and remember who you really are, don't try and be anyone else but you. Thanks guys <3

[girloveswolves]

rumors, well not realy rumor, that im emo, and a slut (im not a slut) it tears you apart and i do a good job of hiding it because no one sees the pain in my eyes.

[23AllTimeLow23]

can you guys please look on my videos about my slit wrist story, i have 3 parts, making a 4th part soon.. im trying to help others stop cutting! so please comment, or message me about it.. i want my story to get across to people like me. so like this comment so others can see it, thankyou! <3

[mysoteria7]

I wrote a song about my friend that was cutting called Brea’s song. To see me perform it live copy or type (mason Bellamy Cedarville) in Youtube’s search window (I can’t post a link). THANKS!

~~PLEASE spread the word if you like it (Facebook, Twitter, ECT)! I want hurting kids to know their value and see it!~~ “YOU ARE A DIAMOND YOU’RE NO LONGER COAL”

[AriaNyx95]

I cut myself for a year and a half and then one night it was all too much and I slit my wrist. I freaked which of course only made it worse. But the next morning I told my mom. She was great. I thought she'd freak and send me to a hospital. It's easier having help. I'll be sober one year on August 27. It is possible. Hang in there. Shure the want, the need is there. But you fight through it. Good Luck to all you. Love is the Movement. TWLOHA....To Write Love On Her Arms

[stupidlovething]

you can't stop until you want to.

[Ibanez00011]

I havent cut in a year but I want to cut SOOOO BADDDD :( I have these horrible cravings.. But if i do cut myself ill have to start all over

[HitandRun42]

@Ibanez00011 I'm in the same boat. I'd stopped for like two months and I just caved two hours ago. Sigh. Back to the beginning. You can do it.

[Ibanez00011]

@HitandRun42 i caved too :( ur not alone......

[HitandRun42]

@Ibanez00011 Sorry to hear. I feel like I'm having a conversation at an AA meeting. :/

[Ibanez00011]

@HitandRun42  Yeah

[XdukySumX]

I hurt my dads feeling bad when i started doing that don't anymore. Dad didn't know why then one day he asked and i told him why Stream of tear strung down my eye's like a river. After i told him what happened to me i felt better every day.Yes my dad is a good parent and yes he is the only one i have. why? because i was abandoned by my mother.She sighn me over to him on my b-day. Sad story for me . What i told him was weel her is a hint (keeping in the family tree) That's not my and never will.

[MollySato]

You have to stop. I know it can be really hard to love oneself but you can learn to at least accept yourself - accept your agony without hurting yourself.

Because you're just as good as anyone else.

And you're so much worth.

The only one you punish is yourself.

You have to ask yourself why you're doing it?

In my opinion depression is actually a sign of health. The world mostly stinks.

But you can learn to handle your depression by knowing yourself, get to know your triggers.

Love & hope 2 you

[aljforever01]

Why am I so depressed ? Nothing even that bad has happened, Why AM I SO SELFISH ?! I just feel like shit i hate myself. My boyfriend tried to help me, But I dont want him to because it puts him through so much, and I feel helpless anyways. ): </3

[cheerleaderj68]

im 14 ive been cutting 4 only like couple of weeks and i watched some vids about it and i wanna stop i have friends who cut themselves and at school its not easy coz people make fun sometimes that i listen to different kind of music and how i dress and now i think im gouing 2 stop too

[tkillxx]

@cheerleaderj68 i know how you feel im 14 and have been cutting for 9 months if you dont stop now it will not stop for a long time i regret it so much please please please please stop i have a boyfriend now but since im still trying to stop when i cut and he finds out it hurts him so much and it hurts me cause i dont wanna see him sad i know i listen to hardcore music i wear my skinny jeans im get called emo and a fag and when people find out you do it gets so much worse you need to stop please

[savemefromyou2]

i wish you fuckin idiots would learn something about pain before you go off spoutin advice like youve been where we've been and seen what we've seen. you have no goddamn idea! cutting is a matter of life and death. its that little smile that gets u through your first day of scool, its the hug that u didnt get when u came from school, it's the picture of the family you used to have...so stfu!

[imaleimme]

@RedFringeManiac okayy

[imaleimme]

im only 12 and yeah ive been cutting for about a year and a half now. i juss do it because of all the confusion goin on, stress, it helps me cope with things and makes me go numb not to feel the pain. and everyone teases me for how i dress and the kind of music i listen to and call me "emo" my scars are bad and i need help!! :(

[MrZzirjizz]

i feel bad because when i was in middle school i mad fun of this kid and he cut......................

[paul36able]

@MrZzirjizz THATS BAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! none knowsabout me in my school. but i have hols in my arms and legs people kick me and it bleeds i neeed help but no one will !!

[mendezfocus]

get a fucking lifeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee people...........y'shua !!!!!!!!!ben joseph !!!!!!!!!!!!!white people im telling you ..the drama queens of the universe if is not one thing is another...what can you possible be depressed about it

[vwcaddylowrider]

great song,,and the cause,its something i do and understand and never judge..i dont understand why i do it ,so i cud never say your right or wrong...good post...

[EchoesofMusic]

HU4L

[musicalskates]

i feel your pain...but also i was just wondering what the song is that you used at the begining and end of this video? with the guitar?

[14Dimah]

@musicalskates the songs are circles by hollywood undead and young also by hollywood undead :]

[EchoesofMusic]

@14Dimah The song is knife called lust. I know my HU

[musicalskates]

@vanillaMilkshakefull I know how you feel!!!

[hendo506]

Just wondering, why the wrists? it does seem to be the go to place to cut but when i did it i tended to do up by the shoulders as it was easier to hide. is there a special significance or is it because it bleeds better?

[musicalskates]

@hendo506 its just because its the easiest place to access..and yes it bleeds better and it actually doesnt hurt as much as any other place, so you can cut deeper.

[coolnicky100]

i know all 2 well how u feel cuz i feel the same :(

[14AL3X]

been there done that, i don't understand why everyone finds it so hard to stop?

[emowolf1998]

@14AL3X its like ciggarettes its just hard to stop i know and im only 12 now, why can't others realize tht to?

[14AL3X]

@emowolf1998 i found it easy....

[sokjetwee]

hi gread vid! i'm also a cuter and i've been doing this for like five years.Its really hard to stop.Everytime i cut it goes deeper and deeper.But its like my only way to cope with this emotions.. And all i hear is how bad it is .. its like i'm evil or something.. got this feeling like no one understands me

x.

[jjc3400]

I USD TOW CUT MYSEF

[lovahollic]

its mostly the same..we try to cope with things.

and when everything is ok we think we can just stop.WELL THOUGHT WRONG!

cause it will never stop.

no1 its just like u said a personal brand of heroine

no2 even if you are able to stop you cant hide the fact u did it once, and trust me it WILL come out and u will be confronted.

or worse mobbed by people because u cut (thats what happened to me)

no3 like u said u change.i hate people touching me. etc.

your life changes forever.

so dont do it...

[MyRedBlade99]

@lovahollic

in simple words once a cutter always a cutter

 i always thought and said that once i realized that i needed to cut

that it helped me

[lovahollic]

@MyRedBlade99

yup...

but i didnt vut for 8 weeks...

personal record..

but it wont be long till i cut again i just know it...

[MyRedBlade99]

@lovahollic

you can go much longer just try not to think about it. i know its hard i only have 6 days without cutting and 2 without burning. i had to stop my burns got infected and even thou they did i still wanna keep going. anyway we just need to try harder and its ok to slip as long as you know u will be able to control it. it kinda does not make sense i hope you understood what i ment. good luck staying SI free

[lovahollic]

@MyRedBlade99

yeah i understood.

i never did burning. one of my friends did but i never.

yeah :)

i will try as hard as i can, the first week i felt this itch in my wrist like it needed cutting so i just snipped my rubber band and it stopped after like 20 mins of snipping :P



[MyRedBlade99]

@lovahollic

yeah i hate that.

i never try the rubberband thing,

when i get that i rub my fist hard on left arm.

but thats great u have a way to stop from cutting.

good luck :-)

hope everything goes well for u.

dont forget u have friends online who understand you,

friends who wont judge you and know ur pain.

[lovahollic]

@MyRedBlade99

thanks :)

the rubberband thing is kinda useless...

cause if you do it really long it will start bleeding and it hurts way more when the rubber band is new or thick.

yes, there are alot of people who understand me online.

in school its only " go away and cut urself" etc...

gosh i hate school...

does that happen to you?

[MyRedBlade99]

@lovahollic well I'm in college right now, so ppl are more mature they dont say stupid things. when they see my scars they ask why i cut or if I'm emo.In high school i had great friends, they would take me out and show me a good time so i would feel better. i really never show it to no one until my third semester in college. I do know ppl talk behind my back in elementery school coz one day a girl that had a crush on me walked up to me, took my hand and turn it. she asked why i hurt myself.

[MyRedBlade99]

@lovahollic

the meanest thing some one has said to me was by my mom, she asked me if i cut for some tybe of devil ritual. yesterday a guy in class asked me if iam crazy why do i cut but i just smile and he did not mean it in a bad ways he just wanted ta confess someting to me. he has been hospitalized and asked me if i have. anyway we kept talking he felt good talking to me about what happen to him. he knew i was not gonna judge him. so school will get better in college, u will meet new ppl.

[lovahollic]

@MyRedBlade99 yeah high school sucks for me then :P but thats ok. college seems much better (from what i heard from you) they just like say stuff thats kinda rude.. once i wanted to pass but those dude stood infront of the door so i was like "excuse me" and then this guys was like " we better move or she will cut us" thats was kinda mean... but you get used to it. luckly my mom doesnt know about my cuts... though she does wonder why i am wearing long sleeves in summer :P

[TheSuicideSnowman]

I wish I could end that shit... Everyday it's the same procedure, and I hate it. But it's the only thing that helps at the moment.

Love and support to everybody out there who's going through the same.

[iClumsy911]

i wish i could cut with out tearing my moms heart out each time the blade touches my skin

[LaurenK456]

I self harm :( and hollywood undead is great



[TheAnnieinwonderland]

i went through this too.i used to cut myself until my wrist was covered from top to bottem with scars.a few weeks ago i hit bottem and took a whole bunch of pills and overdosed and i was within minutes of dying..but something saved me.thank god for that:))

[slothsandshit8]

I know its soo fucking hard, knowone knows how hard it is to get over until they expieriance it. Im pretty much addicted to seroquel, and i think my slelf harming is alot worse to get over. But im taking a step and im strating a gruop my counclior runs, called teens needing tools. Im pretty scared for it, but in the end there could be good results!? Good luck to everyone who is suffering right now!

[depressedcutter999]

i regret every cut i made on myself. every scar. every abusive boyfriend. every abusive friend. i regret my life. i go to bed feeling like hell and wake up feeling like hell, i want to die but im too scared to die. i just know once my cuts get as bad as they can get, im going to die completely on accident. all the scars and cuts i have remind me of how badly i deal with things and how hurt i am. i hurt myself so people cant hurt me. im slowly shutting everybody thats important in my life out.

[NeverSoLonley23]

:c oh sweety im so sorry iv been going through the same thing and its hard i really hope u get better there is always hope i havent been able to stop but we can if we try are hardest (i know i sound like a mom and im 13 lol)

[Jukukiwaiyi2]

"This Video should not be triggerring. Since I don't have any triggerring photos in this video."

what the hell do you call that at 1:49 then... it actually triggered me a bit, but it's no more triggering than the razor blade on the bloody tissue next to me anyway, so i'll let you off ^.^

[Jukukiwaiyi2]

at 0:44 onwards, about the deepness thing.... thats the only thing that scares me about my SH, because it's true... it's never deep enough.. for example if i cut deep today... if i cut that deep tommorow it just wouldn't be anywhere as satisfying :S

and yes, it is quite panicky when it bleeds loads, i did that in a toilet cubicle when i was at uni, didnt stop bleeding, blood was going on the floor, toilet seat and down the toilet, obv most the blood was on the tissues though

[SIhope87]

its ok

keep your head up

your not alone

[StRaNgEwOrLd99]

am i a complete idiot because strangley........

i enjoy cutting!

[betty4luke]

feel the same, your definetly not alone x

[HebiNoDavid]

I hope you're doing well, good luck to you and everyone else who wants to stop cutting.

I haven't cut for four months now, but truthfully I don't feel any happier.

[flyrider10]

Pain or emptyness is why most people cut. What people don't notice is that pain of any kind leaves a scar. Some if these scars are phisical and therefore visible. But the worst scars are from a person hurting you on the inside. The scar from that shows more than the phisical scar. This is simply because your mental power is so much stronger than your phisical power. But in the end you have to come to the realization that pain doesn't cure pain.

[fronterapan]

i think it is butyful to cutting

[91karri]

all we hear is how bad it is, how stupid we are, why we shudnt do it. no one ask why we do it or sees the pain in our eyes.

wat if we stumble wat if we fall, wat if we lose our step and make fools of us all. will they forgive us when our backs against a wall?

[alanacolleenpark]

@91karri who is"we" ? emo people?

[XoXoTearsturnRedXoXo]

The pain i feel is just to real. Time and tears cannot erase, because every morning i have to see your face. I cannot run from you i cannot hide because everywhere i turn i just feel broken up inside. When the tears turn red i find relief from all the pain hoplessness and grief. I know the darkness will take me away but i just need something to help me get through the day.

[surfergurl96]

I've been cutting for over a year now. It is an addiction and a mental illness. I hate it, but I love it. And I'm sorry you have to go through this. And btw you have awesome taste in music. I love HU lol

[skinnyman1423]

i cut myself for a month before i replaced my addiction to pain with adrenaline i started to fight, i still fight yeah the scars are still there but they get replaced by new ones and every scar is how i know that im alive.

[thekelseyshow1995]

i have been cuttung for a while now and i ust cant stop. no matter how hard i try i just cant. ive been cought 3 times now and my parents could give less of a shit. i used to talk to the school counselor but then eventually i just stopped talking. we'd sit there for a half hour just staring at point blank. i told my boyfreind i cut and hes bee so great to me. we've replaced cutting wit flicking a rubberband at my wrist. i do it all the time now. and it really helps. thats just some advice for u

[poptartsuicide]

lol

[ReneeSavedByGrace]

I know I was addicted to it it started when I was drunk then I used it for everything and I couldnt stop and I had a panick attack too then I was careful and very cold when I cut I started when I was 14 I am now nearly 18 I stopped cold turkey and then started again But I'm trying to stop I havent cut for ... 2 wks ok its only a start I need to stop before I become my scars!

[mothermayi73]

wow.....that qas amazing

[maddie1346]

it will never be deep enough. so true. :(.

[LadyWentworth30]

I feel you pain...honestly i´ve been there... Self harm is a serious problem and even if someone was just doing it for attention they still have a big big problem. Its an illness like schizophrenia, anorexia or anything. Would oyu tell a schizophrenic person to just "get over it"? And of course there'll always be people who have it a lot worse but how does that change the fact that someone is depressed? Don't judge people because they have mental problems. It's just not fair.

[xoNikkiLovesRockxo]

i swear, most people only cut themselves for attention or to seem more emo just cause its "in" right now. I think the whole emo trend is completely dumb and is making people do stupid things just to look cool.

[topsnip123]

hey im bin the egzact same way but none of my parents found out and my chest is realli bad and its geting closer and closer to my throught i need help to stop desperatly and i reali reali feel for you so badly

[PlyBethany3]

i know exacually how u feel i have been cutting for 6 months and im trying to stop

[IYTEMATE]

stupid

[IYTEMATE]

for fucks sake pple you only live once!! everyone goes thru shit, its not the answer! its pathetic and selfish, think about pple dying of terminal illnesses hu would do ANYTHING to live and there u lot are slitting ur wrists :S get a life

[fergetu6]

to IYTEMATE: do you think we like it? may be im only speaking for myself but when i was going through i hated it but it felt like the only way. i knew there people more fucked up than me but i couldnt help it. it always hurt, it hurt worse than what i was going through so it helped me forget. it people like you who did this to me and other people. you dont listen when we want help in fact you chastize us. you make us feel worse.

[rainbowdoom]

You could always move to Africa and watch your family get shot in the head while you're getting raped, would that make you feel something?

[diecastrevalatia]

Life is a complicated thing. We all have our problems and we all know what it's like to feel abandoned and alone, whether or not everyone chooses to admit it, we all feel it. Stop thinking so much about what people think of you and start thinking about what you think of yourself. Get a dog to keep your mind occupied or something. It's easier to cope with pain when you have a companion there who's not gonna judge you, will always listen, and comes running to you with all of his love everyday.

[babygirl149207]

ouch, thanks reaper69316.

i feel lovely now.

really I do. :/

[lifelessxlies]

because of my boyfriend i havnt cut in 2 er 3 months but its terrible because my mom and dad always give me hell when i do cut and i havnt for so long and they dont even seem to care they dont even just say like good for u you havnt cut for awhile im proud that would be good dylan id the only one im holding back for he makes it so i sont wanna and he also dosnt care about the scars i have :) there rlly bad on mi legs and i love him fo loving me and not my body :) i never want him to leve me :)

[emolurv101]

iv never thought id say this but that is exactly the situation im in except my mom knows not my dad ......

[XxXEm0iSl0VeXxX]

thats soooooo sadddd =[[[[,, i no how you feel. =[