Dedicated to suicide survivors

[charlesthepoet2004]

DO A WEB SEARCH ON:

charles h. miranda OR:

charlesthepoet2003

THANKS.



[xXxMISTATRIGGAxXx]

im a survivor but probably not for long.......

[fugenleim666]

@xXxMISTATRIGGAxXx i feel your pain. You're not alone. Be corageous to seek help!

[duhericaisgroovy]

hey, I've made my own Teen Suicide Prevention video, and I really want to get it noticed, and I was just wondering, what did you do to get yours so many views? I think your video is great, and if you can check out mine, I'd be really grateful :)

[ppswift00]

@duhericaisgroovy

I just tagged video with sad, suicide, survivor, pain etc

[psalmssix]

My 21 year-old son attempted to kill himself twice in the past six weeks. The first time he called hisexGF and he lived. He has sliced his arms from palm to elbow with a utility blade. I found him the second time minutes from bleeding to death. With the Lords helpand AA he is getting better. Read Psalms 6. and remember "God loves me where I am at, and too much to leave me there" also "The LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you or forsake you"

[ppswift00]

Stay strong as you will get through the pain. I know you will

[annamelia765]

My boyfriend just killed himself on october 21 2010. I found his body. I am dealing with all these feelings.

[269jp]

My father committed suicide last year but jumping under a train. This has ruined my life and everything I thought was solid and normal. My mother is losing her mind and my sisters are just so grief stricken. Complicated grief sums it up but you are expected to act normal so others dont have to worry. Its hell. Plus having to endure the arm chair critics and opinions of people who know nothing. Its destroyed my whole being.

[browneyes4u18]

somaybe suicide isn't the best way,but maybe 2 some of us,it makes us feel alive sure it's not easy to recover from a suicide attempt cuz personally i found myself in that place.but theres always ppl who cares bout u,sure it's not easy but theres always some1 whos wilin2 listen 2 the pain we carry.it may not be the same way but the few ppl who have gone through the same thing will help u out even though if its just by listening and tht sometimes makes the difference.im here if some1 wants 2 talk

[pepedicha]

truth is suicide dont does shit, all you really need in life to solve your problems is balls , and starting again somewhere else, fuck the concept of god, fuck the problems we all have them, life is all you really get , life is so precious is the only dream on the way to death

[Gostokom]

Atrops06, you are doing the same things like my wife did 3months ago talking the same words seeking for helps on forum or suicide forum, you are confident that everybody around u are going to be well, let me tell u something, I understood the pain of my wife after she suicide. I miss my fife like crazy i steel cry her everyday, sometime i have the thought of the suicide too to join her.

now she is like flower, after she die, the seeds of the pain grow in the peopls who love her.

[Atropos06]

I've been contemplating suicide for a couple weeksnow, and the interesting thing to me is that if I were to tell anyone, they'd just say "Oh, you might be bi-polar or depressed, etc." The funny thing is, I am depressed, but because I'm depressed about how my life is an impossible mess of misfortune, I am literally Mr. wrong place, wrong time. I wonder what people like me should do, people who's problems actually can not be solved.

[ppswift00]

You must try and have faith in tomorrow. There is always a way even though you may not see it now Have hope

bless you

[Atropos06]

Heh, "tomorrow" is a funny thing isn't it, because it never actually comes. Tomorrow is always tomorrow, it will never be today, and I think that's something too many people tend to forget. Anyways, laters.

[charleslee001010]

God I missed my friend so much. He killed himself 6 months ago.

[ppswift00]

It is a tough journey leaving us with so many feelings and unanswered questions

Be strong and take the time you need to grieve

bless you

[browneyes4u18]

@charleslee001010 i know what u mean my childhood friend that was like a sister to me comitted suicide..n i'm sorry bout ur friend i know how hard it can be, but try and remember all the great stuff tht u guys did..i know it's not easy 2 forget but just keep in mind tht hes in a better place and tht hes watching u and also his family and remebering all the joy tht he shared in his life..so don't let urself down he wouldn't wanna c u like tht but instead with a smile.. i'm here if u wanna talk 2.

[charleslee001010]

@browneyes4u18 I wish I had gone to drink with him then he may not have died

I do not know if I can ever forgive myself for that

[browneyes4u18]

@charleslee001010 don't blame urself maybe he did it 4 a reason that mayb knows bout only he did..he was needed in heaven and he's better in tht place cuz he could watch from there all his loved ones and also friends..just remember ur not alone trust me.. if u ever need some1 to talk to im here, and u can count with me..

[f22fighter12]

I am too a survivor, I took a cup of muphys oil cleaner and took more than 50,000mg of ibeprohin and hung myself for 3 minutes until the cord broke..I looked towards my faith for god and it helped me alot! but from other people say in these comments, it is true how people cant judge on survivors who havent been through the same road. just wanted to share this.

[ppswift00]

thank you

[TMA1124]

I have felt like this for a long time now. I felt apart from everybody, and lonely. IT got to the point where drugs were involved, and I ran away from home. I was sent to the hospital to find out that my brain doesn't produce enough of the hormones needed to sustain positive emotion for long periods of time. Thanks to dedicated people like you, and proper medication, the only thing that makes me depressed anymore are the scars on my arms reminding me of those horrid times.

[ppswift00]

I am so glad you pursued it enough to see your was a medical reason. By looking at those scars you can be proud of yourself for getting through those difficult times xxx

[shortyx2xdope]

alot of people don't dare to call a suicide hotline cuz they don't want to be thrown into some loony bin. i would love to be able to call and talk to someone but i don't dare because i'm afraid that will happen. i am not going to kill myself but it's hard to talk to anyone about feeling sad like that, and then thinking if u do talk people will just put u somewhere instead of trying to help.

[summernd]

I dont know you but I'd help, without trying to call the patty wagon! Msg me anytime!

[lilysasaki]

I guess nobody can understand the pain we are going through unless they walked in our shoes. Suicide is not just another death, it is so complicated. Haunted by the what ifs and if onlys. Life can never be the same. They say death is a death, no. it is not. Nothing comfort, nothing works

[ppswift00]

You are so right. It is a haunting and not a normal death. We will carry it always but in time find must find a way to live with it.. bless you

[ticks4ticks4]

Great comment---someone who thinks rationally--yet realistically--from both sides of the story--and realizes that there are unknown elements to such a matter.

[kalacaw]

I wish I could open up.  There have been two in my family, and that's just the tip of the iceberg. There is nobody in this world to talk to.

[ppswift00]

I understand. No one can explain what the survivor goes through unless you have been there .... but there are others in this world... i am one of many

[browneyes4u18]

@kalacaw mayb it's hard to find someone to talk to, but they are a few of us that can understand what you go through life..sure it may not be the same way but i can i sure you that theres always someone avaible to listen..if u wanna talk i'm here..

[kalacaw]

@browneyes4u18 Thank you Katia. I posted that a few months after a second suicide in my family. I had only met her a couple of times, but it still opened up a lot of old wounds. My sister was the first suicide and that was 1973. It brought back a lot of old memories. I'm much better now, but I'm glad to make a new friend here. You're very kind and I'm happy to meet you. :)

[browneyes4u18]

@kalacawNo problem, and from the bottom of my heart i'm truly sorry bout ur losses, just remember they would want u mopping around but instead smile at all the memories u shared with both of them and smile.i also lost my friend who was just 17 while i was 6 o 7 yrs old and i get where ur coming from..remember there in a better place and there always watching u.remember them with love n happiness..and im here 4 u as a friend this is my email brown_eyes4u18@msn.com u can talk 2 me when ever uwant.

[fagsaaaa]

As a survivor of my father's suicide I appreciate that you made the video. He passed some time around April 2, 2006, I do not know the exact date and I am still hurting. Again thank you and I am sorry about your best friend. A good cry always helps.

[KellyLCrutcher]

I found out through a trickle-down e-mail sent September 11 that a friend of mine, William Frank MacArthur Jones, took his life back in February. I've been through an emotional hell ever since I got that e-mail. All I'm hearing is "straighten up, that boy wasn't anything to you" from my grandmother and mother. I'm dying inside and they don't even care enough about the pain I'm in to try to get me any help. Will WAS something to me; he was one of the only friends I had. I wish I could join him.

[ppswift00]

Kelly You own those feelings and no one can tell you to get on with life. Reach out and get some grief councilling and if there is one in your area join a group related to suicide. The healin road is hard but once you begin getting the support you need (where you can talk about how you feel) healing can begin .... hugs

[jtaforJesus]

i just wish u could understand what it's like 2 be suicidal. there's 2 kinds of survivors...the people left behind AND THE PEOPLE WHO TRIED BUT FAILED. NO ONE EVER LISTENS TO US!!! WHY NOT? HOW COME YOU CANT EXCEPT THAT WE HAVE NO HOPE, THAT WE ARE SO SAD. BUT WE ARE SUPPOSE 2 CHANGE HOW WE FEEL JUST FOR YOU? how about how WE feel??? i dont want 2 live and i dont think anyone has the right to say i have 2 but GOD. why doesnt anyone dedicate a video to us???????????????????

[ppswift00]

i would love to make a slideshow and dedicate it to those of who who are struggling. As a survivor i know the feelings coming from only one side the survivor's side. Please share with me the feels you must live with each day and help me to understand more

[jtaforJesus]

thank you. i will but it will take a whole lot of writing because it is ALOT. i will write to you, not on here. give me a couple of days please. THANK YOU! (((hugs)))

[bipolarscott]

It's 3:oo a.m. and i'm sitting here watching video's of suicide survivors I'm one myself last year my father shot himself. I'm very suicidal probably more now than I've ever been before. I'm married 4 young kids but I'm in trouble with the law lost my liscense my job and charged with a third degree felony going back to court in february. Anyhow I pluck away day after day hating my own existance but not wanting to hurt anyone else by killing myself either. so what keeps you going? I live for kids

[ppswift00]

My ex committed suicide last May. In the past 8 years my ex husband left me with my 1 year old and my 3 year old. A single mom now for almost 8 years. Other difficult changes in life since then. All i can say is yes i look into my children's eyes and know they need and count on me. They are what have always kept me going. All situations take time. Things do change and improve but we have to allow ourselves to wait out the time. Take it day by day ..... thank you scott

[ticks4ticks4]

Methinks the will to live is stronger than givem credit for--e.g. consider drastic circumstances through which we struggle. Most people have had some thoughts of "what would it be like to be dead/commit suicide". Yet, 'doing so' seems so drastic & "catastrophic". Hope for better times, family/neighbors, medication access, free support groups, religion, self-help BOOKS, whatever..can keep us going. It must be hard on your kids. And the unknown--is the dead person really better off than living?

[ppswift00]

You are so right it is the unknown. My kids are too young to know what really happened. Someday i will tell them. Thanks for your comment

[fagsaaaa]

Amen, I knew after my dad succeeded 6 weeks after a failed attempt that he was no longer suffering. There is hope for people who attempt suicide, they need love and support. We need to do more for mentally ill and depressed people. There needs to be a fund for these illnesses. Mental illness is a valid sickness like diabetes. I know first hand that if it is not treated it can kill. I hope that you get better, and talk to your family.

[ppswift00]

I think it is so important that you are all opening up That is one of the first biggest steps to take in healing ourselves I think it to is so important that we can understand what we are each going though... god bless

[XQzix]

An extraordinarily sweet lady friend of mine took her life on September 28, 2008, and I can tell you that I am in a psychological and emotional hell over it. She was supposed to call by a certain day. She never made that call, and I know that I should have called her instead.

I can't stop feeling in my heart that she committed suicide as a result of my not being vigilant enough.

She was such a sweet soul, and I will always hurt for her until our reunion in heaven.

[ppswift00]

.. time It is natural for us to initially feel self guilt Please remember that we are not responsible for another person taking their own life. .. she is not hurting now

hugs ... give yourself some time... we will always carry it with us .. but i know they don't want us to beat ourselves up xxx

[ppswift00]

The biggest step is talking I am glad you can do that now. Life can be tough but remember things change so much.. so fast and so often. With faith i believe you will get to a better place in time ... but i dont mean heaven.... Lots of time to get there... hugs

[painfulsoulbleeding]

Thank you for making such an honest video. I'm also a survivor of suicide - my best friend took her life in August 2005. I'm still trying to survive the pain and loss. I wish you lots of love on your own journey. *hugs*

[ppswift00]

Thank you so much

[amyleefan613]

Great video.

[ppswift00]

May we all learn how to deal with the tough times in this life and never give up ... please search for the help... it is out there for you

[ppswift00]

Day by day. We will get there.

[ppswift00]

I hope this helps others who are going through losing someone close to you to suicide and you know you are not alone What you feel is real and normal