Best of Conservapedia 5

[Ignorantf00l]

FUCK:D Is it a pun?:D

[shrikechan]

You have got to be fucking kidding me!

Sadly, I know that you aren't.

[Cadfan17]

What's the music in this video?

[omaregb]

you gotta be fucking kidding me

[BadScienceForFools]

wave-particle duality = man walking on waves with both feet?

[steveb0503]

Um, it's not THAT kind of wave.

Facepalm - no, better yet, headdesk!

[HolyPantsMcTavish]

Even if jesus did live and die and come back and walk on water...WTF does that have to do with wave particle duality?!?! It's like saying 'jesus ate a cheese sandwich thereby foretelling the creation of the Wankel rotary engine.

[TheStigma]

My god that is so dumb I am lost for words...

What exactly is the point of conservapedia? To be a repository of stupidity? That is how it will be looked at in posterity. At least it will serve some function.

[chattiestspike2]

@Kwinnky did you make this quote up? because it's brilliant. I hope you don't mind but I would like to use this quote in a video :D

[BuecherFuerAlle]

Song please

[chattiestspike2]

@BuecherFuerAlle moment of peace by gregorian

[BuecherFuerAlle]

@chattiestspike2 thank you

[TheMusesOrg]

@BuecherFuerAlle That was my exact same question ^_^

[MARI0LAND]

If the water walking parable WAS a clue to Quantum Mechanics, Buddha did that before Jesus (There's even a story about Buddha teaching a disciple to walk on water). The giant Orion from greek mythology also did it before JC, at least in the stories.

So even if it had anything to do wave/particle-duality (which of course it doesn't), the new testament story was not new and unique when written.

[playerwithfaith]

Have you seen their article about how soccer is a socialist sport?

[MARI0LAND]

Good Videos! But somehow I can't visit conservapedia, it just gives me an error message. Like it isn't an error when online...

[hens0w]

@MARI0LAND you computer has a stupid wall to protcte you from the stupid

[MARI0LAND]

@hens0w I wish. But that's a million dollar idea, man.

[Nightzo]

@MARI0LAND Do you get an error message like 'WARNING. VISITING THIS SITE MAY LOWER YOUR INTELLIGENCE'

[MARI0LAND]

@Nightzo

"o you get an error message like 'WARNING. VISITING THIS SITE MAY LOWER YOUR INTELLIGENCE'"

>> No, the error message is quite stupid itself. "You don't have permission to access / on this server.

Additionally, a 404 Not Found error was encountered while trying to use an ErrorDocument to handle the request."

That means: You are not allowed to visit the site (which doesn't exist anyway).

[blurglide]

@digitalbullshit Killing schrodingers Jesus?

[Kailoa36]

Sheeeeeeeeeesh!

[truckcompany]

Forget about what they said, I'm just surprised the authors of the bible had the intelligence to write down words

[theshredator]

The bible was described nearly over 3.5 years ago when a prokaryote took a shit on another prokaryote.

[ElectroMagneticJosh]

I honestly had to click the link - there are way more crazy ones on that article. Its a goldmine of hilarity.

[theone0044]

best comedy site evar!!!

[meritocratic1337]

Dumb Christians don't even know what their book is saying. The passage is clearly about Quantum Field Theory, not Quantum Mechanics.

[USERNAMEfieldempty]

"Jesus saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them. Shortly before dawn he went out to them, walking on the lake." Mark 6:48

So there you are. The wave/particle nature of matter clearly and plainly laid-out, 2000 yearrs ago. Although, I think some of the maths is a little inelegant, and his fourth equation is supurfluous, but it is clear that Jesus was working along the right lines and his conclusion is bang-on. And incorporating The 'Faith' Quark was genius.

[pilgrimpater]

Why don't i have access to the links you give in the description?

I get "You don't have permission to access /Biblical_scientific_foreknowl­edge on this server."

Do they know about me?

[NorthForkFisherman]

So what's the big deal with this one? I can walk on water too.

In Michigan.

In January. LOL

[KaroKoenich]

Having just watched all 5 - brilliant!

One tiny suggestion: Let them sink in a few more seconds at the end. Less stressful that way

[chattiestspike2]

@KaroKoenich what do you mean?

[AdvocatusDiaboliAU]

@chattiestspike2

i think he means leave the ending up for a few more seconds... so we can actually read the conservapedia entry...... and if he didnt mean that... can you do it for me at least?

[KaroKoenich]

@chattiestspike2 Just make these videos a few seconds longer, that's all. Also, a link to the next part in the description box (not only 2 secs in the vid itself) would be flash. Looking forward to see more of them. Conservapedia must be an endless resource, so I expect many of them :-).

[SeanXanatos]

@chattiestspike2

Meaning, I have to pause the video to read the conservapedia quote. At least, that's what I figured.

I'm no slouch on my reading level, either.

[StrikaAmaru]

@chattiestspike2 seconding advocatus diaboli; I'm a reasonably fast reader, and I had to go back and pause @ #3 to finish it. This one I managed, tho :)

[rounder421]

@chattiestspike2 The end ends too fast. When the video is over it goes to related videos. Give it a few seconds for slower readers and for people to ponder the stupidity for a sec. you only give 6 seconds of reading time. give it a few more seconds, like this would be good at 30seconds even, imho.

[urantivirus]

these should have been one video not five.

[Waitingforthebigboom]

Any scientific "proof" could just as well prove early knowledge without divine inspiration or that aliens visited the Earth and taught it to early humans. I think the further out they have to go to prove something, then the more it leaves it open for all manner of speculation and interpretation from some really unhinged people. Somehow, this stuff reminds me of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

[caerwynentllc]

@Waitingforthebigboom can we put the words "DONT PANIC!" on the back of religious books and pamphlets? :P

[bushputz]

@caerwynentllc

Where's my towel? I'm outta here!

[caerwynentllc]

I'm confused? Does this mean jesus was a wave, a particle, or both simultaneously? Does Quantum Uncertanty apply when directly observing the charge, direction, and spin of the "Christron?" And, since this was addressed in the bible "so clearly," which part of leviticus described the jesus-field-transmission boson and its associated neutrino? The LHC is actually the anti-christron!

[Cyrathil]

"Isaac Newton, cornerstone of the scientific revolution, based his research on the scientific authority of the Bible and sought enlightenment in scripture" - Caption from Conservapedia

Conservapedia offering their support for Alchemy!

I think this page is the "best"(worst) of Conservapedia. I can't even get past the first several articles (It was around the bloodletting "prescience" given by the Bible, despite them not even attempting to bullshit their way past that one).

[deepashtray]

You realize of course that you could spend the rest of your video making time and energy here on YT just pointing out how stupid Conservapedia is?

[irreverentreverend]

"erk"

[niqueth]

"The secret to walking on water is knowing where the rocks are"

-Bootsy Collins

[SwineNahNah]

@niqueth

There is another way - wait for winter, it could be pretty cold in Israeld sometimes. 8)

[savageecho]

@SwineNahNah Not at galilee...

[mercatormac]

@digitalbullshit Before they looked in the tomb it was Schrodinger's Jesus.

[BathTubNZ]

Make an Intense Debate account already! :P

[Mcfly88]

tide comes in, tide goes out, never a miscommunication! Thank you jesus for putting these PINHEADS in their place!

[HorrorIllogium]

Yep, these are great.

[snakeguy76]

I'd like to see Jesus walk on water now that he has those holes in his feet.

[chattiestspike2]

@digitalbullshit BAM!!! lol

[GeneralMontague]

This depresses me. Not due to the stupidity, but because i am not surprised. At all

[grendelee]

Wha? Wha?! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!? KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! *brain parts everywhere*

[smaakjeks]

I think I just got an aneurysm. 

[yzfr620032]

Should I go to conservapedia now that ED isn't there to provide me lulz?

[ferrett78]

Maybe "walking on water" was the translation of the ancient word for "swim" ;-)

[DeathofSpeech]

I tried to facepalm but my arm spontaneously turned into a sperm whale and a pot of begonias.

"Oh no, not again!"

[moestietabarnak]

@DeathofSpeech worst than Vogon Poetry !

[DeathofSpeech]

@moestietabarnak

"worst than Vogon Poetry !"

.

and listening to Nephy has been described as being "like having your brain smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a bloated goldbricker."

[Meatbag211]

I knew it! I actually had a conversation with a creationist and they said this! now I know their source material.

[hildegain]

Ummm what the FUCK?

[bamboo4tameshigiri]

holy fucking shit

[jimthepleb]

pls find the shit on wearing black and british spelling spike:)

[jimthepleb]

oi! leave toast out of it...some of my best friends are toast and they're smarter than this

[tipoomaster]

BAHAHAHHAHA. Oh Conservapedia, all your writers have the collective IQ of a piece of toast.

[Gekkibi]

@tipoomaster

...But they sure are creative!

...Or they use drugs...

[Tsukasamacleod]

Anyone ever watch "Fist of the North Star"? You know how their heads swell up and explode. Yeah, mine just did that.

[Crickett2814]

@Tsukasamacleod

Tsukasamacleod, you're already d---umbfounded.

Thought I was going to go in another direction with that, didn't you? :P

[Tsukasamacleod]

@Crickett2814 Right now, Kenshiro just facepalmed because someone found a more efficient way to make people's heads explode.

[nyarlotep]

This series on conservapedia is gold!

[LogicalThinker667]

oh the humanity

[Einsteinium007]

I can't believe how excited I'm getting over this series your making lol

[EverEvolvingApe]

I think I speak for everyone here when I ask: WTF????

[LucasI3434]

My brain just crawled out of my ear to escape the stupid.

[journeyer58]

@LucasI3434 ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!

[JCLeSinge]

@LucasI3434: That's nothing; my brain melted, crawled down my spine and slithered out my butt to preserve itself from the corrosive stupid being poured in through my eyes. It's now hiding under the couch, quivering in shock and asking for big fat J to recover from such a traumatic experience.

[disrxt]

This is stupider than Deepak Chopra's misrepresentations of quantum mechanics! LOL

[greycloud24]

wave particle duality has nothing to do with walking on water. liquid and solid state of atoms forming molecules has nothing to do with wave function collapse.