Unlikely Greetings Cards - Mock the Week - BBC Two

[AcousticJW]

roses are red

violets are blue

im hiv positive

and now so are you

[BethMakesStuff]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I know I'm pretty,

But what happened to you?

[XboxArcher]

roses are flowers,

violets are too,

except that they're purple...

and not fucking blue.

[ginnyisdacoolest]

Frankie does love his AIDS jokes, doesn't he?

[Lynnch1]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Keep on showering

Im watching you.

[kingcrow15]

here is a challenge youtubers write a poem that doesn't start with roses.

[Chemeleon86]

@kingcrow15

Violets are blue,

Roses are red,

I could have failed your test,

But I passed instead.

[3darkn1t]

@kingcrow15

Violets looked bruised

Roses bleed

but who the fuck gives a shit?

[AKAcolide]

@kingcrow15

voilets are purple

roses can be white

just a heads up

im watching u tonight

[supersleepsalot1]

roses are grey,

grey like a fog,

but it dosent matter,

cause LOL im a dog.

[Assdafflabaff]

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I'm not very creative,

Show me your tits.

[MegaBlahBlahBlah93]

Thumbs up if, after the first two top comments.. You started reading all the Roses are red comments.... :). (Y)

[MissJellyCube]

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I'm schizophrenic

and I am too.

[MissJellyCube]

Roses are brown,

Violets are brown,

Who's been shitting on my flowers?

[YourFavoriteArabTV]

@MissJellyCube lol nice one XD

[MissJellyCube]

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I have Alzheimers

Cheeseburger.

[TheGunsofblackroses]

roses are grey

violets are too

I'm colour-blind :(

[yaying404]

roses are red

violets are blue

no shít sherlock,

I'm telling you

[xxellababiixx]

@0.01 fart?

[JaCkMiChEaLs0n]

get in there greg!!

[Gryphon950]

Greg Proops?

[snakesruleLMR]

GREG PROOPS!!!!

[TheBuddahGuy]

I'm just clicking through all of the scenes we'd like to see videos lol

[FalconsPOWN2]

Congratulations on passing your test. You have HIV

[gold7oo]

Moses is dead,

pilots like the view,

I have no idea what I just said,

and neither do you

[gold7oo]

I'm bad at this stuff

Orange's are orange

now i've had enough

Unfortunately nothing rhymes with that stupid fruit.



[Xerces92]

Greg Proops doesn't even say anything!

[XboxArcher]

i wondered why my card smelt weird...

[Kodiakgirl49]

I'm going to be designing the illustrations on greeting cards soon... I might just use some of these XD That would be funny.

[mentres9]

HOW DID THIS BECOME THE TOP COMMENT ????

[IamLewis1998]

@mentres9 Its Not.....



[slightlyinsaneFTW]

@mentres9 Answer is: It didn't.

[OOjuniperberry]

@mentres9 lol fail..

[doorwindow7]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

This poem makes no sense

microwave.

[Christofferu]

Roses are flowers,

Violets are too.

However, they are purple,

and not fucking blue.

[BillHartnelliscool27]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I'm sick of these types of joke

So stop it, will you?

[IamLewis1998]

Roses Are Red

Violets Are Blue

Where Is My Foreskin,

Oh Yeah Im A Jew

[GeneralLeeStudios]

GREG PROOPS WAS ON THIS ONE

[A5HGSTAR]

Roses are Red

Violets are Red

wait a sec....

OH FUCK! THE GARDENS ON FIRE!

[jatt92rs]

18 people passed their tests

[TheActon88]

roses are red

violets are blue

i've got something nasty,

and so does your hamster

[jatt92rs]

@TheActon88 not funny... try again

[TheActon88]

@jatt92rs meh... cba

[TheHollandique]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I'm in the bath and I'm hard

And I'm thinking of you!

[dropmegaboulder]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

IN SOVIET RUSSIA, POEM WRITES YOU! HA!

[thegamez100]

Roses are grey

violets are grey

im clourblind

[LightningIzzy]

Roses are orange,

Violets are elepphant.

I suck at writing poems,

Refridgerator.

[KitKatKruncher]

@LightningIzzy You suck at spelling as well.

[LightningIzzy]

@KitKatKruncher That's the point.

[thewyj]

@LightningIzzy that is the best thing I have read. Ever.

[ryeable]

Woses are wed

Viowets are bwue

I have a speech pwoblem

And now so do you.

[DoodDC1]

Good to hear that the penis removal surgery was succesful

We're having a party to celebrate

But you can't come

[AFLoneWolf]

I love how Greg Proops was so eager to step up.

[Lars2326]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I got caught waking

While looking at a picture of you

[Reesj321]

@Lars2326 waking?

[jatt92rs]

@Lars2326 not funny

[StaraziaSelin66]

roses are red,

violets are blue...

wait...fuck that

violets aren't blue...

and stop making up poems! they're fucking shit!

[GlophTheweb]

roses are red

violets are violet

FIX YOUR FUCKING EYES!

OR IM ABOUT TO GET VIOLENT!

[RichiCGuitar]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I'm shit at rhyming

And I have a ten inch cock

[OtakuXCore]

Roses are brown

Violet are brown

someones shat all over my flowers.

[ninjahunter101]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I'm wanking

and thinking of you

[AutisticPersona]

You Suck. 

[XCRO4K13X]

roses are red

violets are blue

im shit at poetry

show us you tits

[Leanashe23]

Roses are brown

Violets are brown

You're a dog

Please stop shitting in my garden. 

[CausingDistress]

Roses are red, (But they can also be other colours)

Violets are blue, (Actually, they're purple, it's in the name)

I'm Obsessive Compulsive,

I can't rhyme either.

[DeAtHbEaD543]

Congrats on getting that vasectomy

we're having a porn party...

but you can't cum ;D

[SJtv123]

I know ur green,

I've done my bit,

This is made of recycled shit

[JerryBeatFreak]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I'll fuck you with a rake!

[FalconsPOWN2]

Thinking of you in this difficult times .... has given me an erection

Congratulations on passing your test, you have HIV

Congratulations on conquering your drug and alcohol dependancy, we're having a party to celebrate, but you cant come

Best jokes, all coincidently make by frankie boyle. Wait, not coincidencially

[KillForCash2012]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Im using my hand

But Im thinking of you

Or

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I have five fingers

The middle's for you

[Glufius]

Roses are red,

violets are blue,

I'm a split personality,

AND SO AM I! :D

[TheTonyMontanah]

@Glufius best 1 here

[Glufius]

@TheTonyMontanah cheers!

[Morkat1991]

@Glufius >am  >have

[Glufius]

@Morkat1991 yeah, well that works too, but then you'd have to change the final line to "and so have I". ;)

[Morkat1991]

@Glufius Point was, you're not a split personality, you have it. The disorder in itself is not something you cannot be, or something you'd think you'd be if you were to sa- ah forget it

[Glufius]

@Morkat1991 no I understand your point.

But the fact is that a person with a split personality disorder, may also have a multiple personalities (more than two), so the fact is: The Real "Personality" you may call him, said the first two lines.

Split number one: comes in at the third line, and split number two at the fourth line.

I know it's not politicaly correct, but it my opinion, it's a fucking hilarious joke :D

[Canningz1]

roses are red,

violets are blue,

this poem makes no sense,

refridgerator.

[xxxilovecupcakesxxx1]

roses are red

violets are blue

your best mate

is SO much better than you!

[MyCORMAC]

roses are red

violets are blue

sugar is sweet

just like your mams tits

[StueyTheDuck]

roses are red

violets are blue

your fish is dead

it drowned!

[saddoproductions]

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I can't rhyme,

COCAINE!

[00die00991]

napalm is red

copper sulphate is blue

anthrax is green

and now so are you

[ImpulseGaming2012]

roses are red

violets are blue

pornhubs down

so your mums facebook will do

[fabzcardon]

16 people have recived one of these cards ...

[xXxLlewellynxXx]

roses are red

violets are blue-ish

you have no foreskin

you must be jewish

[MyCORMAC]

@xXxLlewellynxXx hahahahahaha

[iluvsadsongx]

roses are red

violets are blue

i suck at poetry

show me your tits.

[LokkerG]

Here's a dark one for women: It's a boy! I have needs...

[LokkerG]

@LokkerG Actually, a better one is: It's a boy... and he's better than my husband.

[marnaka2488]

"Roses are red

Violets are blue

This card is sh*t

It's made of poo"

[Hippievanobession]

*Facebook Poem*

Roses are red

Violets are blue

You look bangable

So I'll add you

[DeAtHbEaD543]

well done on your vasectomy were having a porn party, but you cant cum

[cruisereevesbarnesXD]

russells tops is awesome and his joke was awesome

[ellenmelon771]

lol, I love Russell Howard, but seriously??? THAT shirt??!! XD xXx

[cruisereevesbarnesXD]

@ellenmelon771 i loved his shirts

[ellenmelon771]

@cruisereevesbarnesXD So do I, but that one is just.... words escape me! XD xXx

[cruisereevesbarnesXD]

@ellenmelon771 haha lol

[sicarius753]

Roses are red

violets are blue

this poem makes no sence

Refrigerater

[MrAdzerman]

@sicarius753 OMG ur So Origional!!! OMG ur So Funny!!! (LOL SARCASM)

[jwardmagic07]

"I know your green I've done my bit...this card is made from recycled shit" lol

[callofluke1]

@jwardmagic07 thanks for puting what they said on the coments because we are all deff and didnt hear it on the vid

[ErinSelinePoppy]

OMG Gregg proops!

[button4boy]

Disappointed Greg Proops didn't go up! He was probably caught off-guard by the fact you could be rude and swear unlike the family friendly Whose Line!

[the0siren0of0night]

"I know you're green, I've done my bit. This card is made out of recycled shit" abbasolutely brillo!!!

[gdaulby]

He is OBSESSED with broadmore

[13baldjj]

@gdaulby Broadmoor*

[connorrhunter97]

roses are red violets are blue i have alzheimer s ring a round the roses ......

[derrenlegendbrown]

"CONGRATULATIONS YOU'RE 18!... on a list of 20 people I'm going to kill :|" LOL.

[CharlieeBieber]

Congratulations On Passing Your Test, You Have H.I.V...

[kitaarmes]

Thinking of you at this difficult time... has given me an erection XD

[djdevilicious1]

I love you so much

I love you like no other

But never again

Gay up with my brother

[nuttymonkey11]

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

Some poems rhyme,

But this one doesn't.

[ConsoleGeek]

You can tell somethings really funny when you hear russel chuckle to the joke in the background

[pkmnguy2010]

0:11 i have loads of home-made cards with that on for my friends cuz i know their moms are gonna catch on eventually

[popazz1]

Frankie Boyle,a COMIC?! Nah,he's just a smug twot!

[TigerWalrus26980]

Hilarious! I work in a card shop and I wish we sold cards like some of these!

[ViiPERUK]

what the fuck is russell howard wearing?

[iHaveAGiraffeSoNerr]

@ViiPERUK Believe it or not.... clothes.

[ViiPERUK]

@iHaveAGiraffeSoNerr welll shouldnt you be a fucking detective? -.-

[iHaveAGiraffeSoNerr]

@ViiPERUK I am ;)

[ViiPERUK]

@iHaveAGiraffeSoNerr well everythings gravy then :)

[Superbruv07]

@ViiPERUK A hideous SKy shirt!

[bigbob0]

lol Frankie is always the funniest!

[burageable]

Russel Howard WHAT A LEGEND !! x

[PiggyDies1]

I love this show :L

[101pyromaniac]

my hart goes out in sympathy

i know your life is torn

i cant believe your dear sweet mum

caught you watching all that porn!

[callumsimmons]

they should have jimmy carr on here sometime

[classicrockfan555]

@callumsimmons They should! He's a great comedian!

[zezema535]

hugh's evil pyscho face makes me lol

[Knightrobo4]

congrartulations you're 18 on a list of 20 people i'm going to kill

[Roystonsmum101]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Just thought you should know

I'm eating for two.

[alexmeeszymidget]

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some Poems Rhyme This One Doesn't. Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I am colour-blind And you are Gay. Roses are Red Violets are Blue The Cake is a Lie And so are you.

[franandhannahshow]

HAHAHA frankie boyle:L

[HYPEDxUPxONxSUGAR]

roses are red

violets are blue

sugar is sweet

and so are you

but the roses are wilting

the violets are dead

the sugar bowls empty

and so is your head :D

[PinkNinjaNews]

heres one

violets are blue

roses are red

your good looking but...

you'd look better dead

[ROBOCAM3000]

what russle said annoys me.

cos it happened to me.....

HELP!

[Joseph3666]

@ROBOCAM3000 its natural dude:L don't worry(:

[TheGuyThatSpysOnYou]

'YOUR MOVING :D!......... we've reposessed your home...' haha I ROFL'D!

[MrScouse91]

I love how at 0.20 after Russells first joke Andy seems to look at the audience for their reaction before approving it himself XD

[Joseph3666]

My heart goes out in sympathy

I know your life is torn

I can't believe your sweet mum

Caught you watching all that porn.

LOL ;D

[Jeffo193]

"Congratulations on conquering your drug and alcohol dependency. We're having a party to celebrate, but you can't come..." story of poor frankie's life :P

[TheDave01450]

what the hell was russell howard wearing

[sassysoph9614]

omg that guy on the right - the one that didnt say anything - he plays max maddigan in true jackson VP! weird! whats he doing on mock the week?

[Kaynas1988]

I've got one

Roses are red

Violets are blue

There is no better way to say

that I love having sex with you

[hugegtavicecityfan]

I like russel`s T.Shirt

[Alexmo555]

Thinking of you at this difficult time has given me an erection.

LOL! Fell off my chair with that one! :)

[xxteamedwardxx01]

Russell!

<3

[martha368]

HaHaHa!

my heart goes out in sympathy

i know your life is torn

i can't beleive your sweet old mum

could be watching all that porn

LMFAO!

[197Callum]

@martha368 its caught you watching.... -_-

[ClaraIsQuirky]

You're moving!

...

We've reposessed your house

XD

[gunithabs786]

Thinking of you has at this difficult time has given me an erection.

[gunithabs786]

Congratulations your eighteen, on a list of thirty people im going to kill.

[slaveelf]

MTW never been the same without Frankie... :(

[Brainiac12000]

Frankie loves his HIV jokes!

[pkmnguy2010]

@Brainiac12000 they're classic

[MizLuvOranges]

O_O hugh looks so sinister  lol

[McBrideKirsty]

russell's t-shirt looks awful hes too young to wear that!

[Dreamstarr77]

Everytime i was like *Let Greg Proops play!*

[Bat2105]

CONGRATULATIONS YOU'RE 18!!.....on my list of 20 people to kill :D

[lillypads101]

Hugh Dennis does creepy and scary so well!

[tgwa90]

Wassup with him n HIV? its gettin Boring now :(

[MotorsportMonster]

@tgwa90 It's a flaming joke!

[OhYeAh2k8BbZ]

Russell Howard is a complete and utter legend, I'm not quite sure what I meant all those months ago when I first shared the comment..... perhaps I meant that they completely overtake the 'scenes we'd like to see' part, and literally nobody can compete lol!

[mMcNamee2010]

Frankie should've said

"Congratulations on giving sperm for the thousandth time, we're having a party to celebrate, but you can't cum"

[MotorsportMonster]

@mMcNamee2010 Er no