Stefana Broadbent: How the Internet enables intimacy

[NeoRelationship]

I can see the benefit of institutions imposing regulations that might keep employees from spending too much time making personal connections while “on the clock” at work, or rules that would support a child’s learning during class. Or laws that could prevent a driver from killing someone while texting. But we may also want to trust adults to use their best judgment and wisdom to determine what the most appropriate use of technology is in any given situation.

[txupham]

Great content. I'm seeking support for a panel of related matter at SXSW Interactive, March of 2011. If you're interested, place your vote for "YouTube vs Cave Drawings: Our Future Anthropological Imprint" at SXSW Interactive's Panel Picker site.

[sethgreenman]

swedes suck

[swebnived]

and I'll leave one more. -_-

[DoJaenin]

hmm... it didn't really surprise me that people only have contact with a small portion of their facebook "friends". I always suspected that - people mainly add others to their friend list on such networks to gain status. Often, they don't even like the people they're adding but it's a win-win situation, so they do it nevertheless.

[globbo100]

The free market would correct the behavior of those people who take it upon themselves to text to a friend or loved one while transacting business on the company's dime.Better this than the all empowering state using a heavy handed approach towards internet users and closing the possible door(s) on improving technologies that would make the internet even more intimate.I think Stafana Broadbent is actually onto something.

[qinghui30]

The breathing is eff-ing irritating.

[dryan22]

I don't need for my brain surgeon to self-determine that he needs to focus on the surgery at hand. Tweet your wife later!

[swebnived]

@dryan22

If this is a serious concern, you need to rethink and realize people are smart and can differentiate a good time to "tweet" or a bad time. You might as well say, "I don't need my soldiers texting their wife in the middle of combat."

She's talking about institutions holding something good back from a lack of understanding the subject. So she's spreading the understanding.

[dryan22]

Thank you for letting me know what I need, and that people use good judgment to a degree that invalidates criticism. A good friend was killed on a bicycle by a driver who was distracted using a cell phone. Cheers! I wish I could come across like you, with all the answers to others.

[swebnived]

@dryan22

sorry for posting an insensitive comment. Who am I to say anything? I have no credibility. I guess making fun of what you said doesn't really provoke a nice reply. I feel bad for a friend who lost another friend, but not when you are trying to make me feel bad with your loss.

[tgirlgo]

just a thought think about how many strangers maybe you have been around or encountered with throughout your school life how many of these people have we connected with?

-thought of the day!

[tgirlgo]

why would you spend so much money on technologally you only use to talk to 2 people?

[Cla452]

No research is waste of money or time, knowledge is always worthy.

[rebobeeve]

i work in chicago public schools throughout chicago, and to say that kids arent using their phones in school is not true in the day to day interactions i observe every day

[66kompis]

I generally like her ideas...... but she's way off about kids using their cell phones in school.

They are in school to learn stuff not chat to their friends they can use the cell on breaks but not in class...!

If I'm on a buss and the bus driver is using his cell phone i would NOT feel safe...!

Since when is it ok to bring friends kids grandparents to work place....being in constant contact by sms is almost like you brought them to work with you....I soo disagree with her on that...

[bunions4444]

So Stefana thinks that disciplining a child for doing something they're told not to do is unfair. She also thinks that a company (which is a legal term for a group of people in business together) cannot decide how the staff will use the company property. She has a problem with a business using the latest technology i.e. cctv to assist them in managing their risk. Hmmn OK Stefana, let the kids run the school & the staff spend the profits, and remember to tear up all the mugshots in the world too.

[david0aloha]

Well, research seems to show that people who are taught from a young age to take control of their own destiny (more common among higher income bracket families) are more successful in business and careers - and often happier. She's advocating for a system that stops trying to crush both that sense of individuality and connection to confidants... one of the banes of our modern society.

People shouldn't be texting all day - nor is it unreasonable to text every couple hours to stay connected.

[swebnived]

@david0aloha

well worded.

[MiranUT]

Shows how disfunctional the whole system is.

I knew US schools sucked when I was in kindergarten. I have no need for face book. Seems like a big waste of time to me.

[SkyFallingInc]

This sounds good in theory, but it is often abused. No one who has lost a family member in an accident caused by someone texting & driving will buy the argument that maintaining intimacy with friends is more important than competent performance of one's job.

[david0aloha]

I'm not sure if she meant while driving for the bus drivers or while stopped. I disagree with texting while in traffic, it's dangerous. On the other hand, there should be no problems with pulling out the cell to send off a text at a stop-over where the bus waits a few minutes. Not sure which she was referring to....

Actually, just checked it, and it seems to be while driving. So I do strongly disagree with her on that point (assuming it's not applied to stop-overs while NOT driving).

[swebnived]

@SkyFallingInc

texting while driving is stupid. and stupid people die sometimes. It's not like something was impairing their driving abilities. It was their own judgement to choose to text. Don't pull the pity card on a subject that is worth talking about.

sorry, that sounds mean. but true.

[trentspencerktm]

Wow a bunch of opinions, what a waste of time.

[cherylwens]

I'll shed my cynicism the day a politician shouts a slogan of "Yes We have!" as opposed to the empty talk we're getting these days. Words have become so powerful, you can earn a nobel peace prize before you've done anything. It's like wiping your arse before you shit.

[cherylwens]

The anonymity of the internet allows people to express their true feelings and make fools out of themselves. Which is a lesser evil compared to politicians feeding the media with perfunctory promises and trite pc talk.

[Chamelionroses]

'Each man is an island.'

[hotellogin1]

Who invited that woman? She can't even interpret her own data! People are getting more and more LONELY!

FACEBOOK is a "social-network" you use on your own. Think about it!

[david0aloha]

"Who invited that woman? She can't even interpret her own data! People are getting more and more LONELY!"

Where's the data proving your point? I tend to disagree :p I feel more connected when I'm able to strike up a conversation with someone before I meet up with them on the weekend or after school/work by using texts/facebook, and it makes me feel more connected to the people I choose to talk to.

[ThaTyger]

(offtopic) I think it differs from person to person. I myself do not feel connected to people at all when talking over the internet. I barely value chatting, and strongly prefer being physically around people. However when you can't be around people due to circumstances it is nice to be able to keep some level of contact. Again, just how I experience it.

[swebnived]

@ThaTyger

I can share some experience with the connection due to chatting on IM and texts.

hearing language and reading language are both extremely good ways to communicate.

If you would like to share ideas, discuss things with close friends, it doesn't require a visit. The Instant messages and skype provide a new way to communicate, not a replacement.

Our thoughts are the most important thing, and we are finding newer tools to relay them to others.

[cannoir]

I am trying to understand the point of this video. I think this woman is talking in circle .

Sorry Stefana who funded your phony research ?

I gotta go the loo.

[aimlessalchemist]

Ted talks are really phoning it in these days.

[leejae]

So..... what's the point????

[vikkipollard5]

The point is to show how the internet enables intimacy!!! Some academics claim that the internet encourages isolation from others, yet this speaker debates these arguments to show how it enables many forms of communication.....

[hyperseauton]

I agree mostly that kids in schools should be able to use mobile communication devices within reasonable boundaries, I am not sure if I want my bus driver to text while driving however.

[CitizenBe]

It always strikes me how many people do not question the amount and extent of regulation and manipulation imposed upon them. Routines embedded in work and schooling routines are extremely powerful and work successfully.

Broadbent does not mention it explicitly but a number of her observations are framed by Michel Foucault's work ("discipline and punish" for instance) . Recommended read - but comes with a health warning: it definitely fosters more critical questioning of the taken-for-granted...

[hack451]

You -don't- think it's a good idea to fire bus drivers using cell phones?

If a bus driver is caught using a cell phone while driving, he _should_ be fired on the spot, without question. If he's in the office or something... that's different. But come on, it's just basic human safty.

[mooxim]

YOU try teaching a child while they're txting under the table or try driving a bus and welcoming on passengers while txting.

Yes the institutions decide who has the right to self-determine their attention, whether they should or not be isolated and the institutions are right. Not everyone can be trusted to decide when to limit contact with others. Stupid woman.

[kokopelli314]

Schools are agencies of socialization, but socialization to what?, Corporate culture? The reason teachers have problems engaging the attention of their students is that many young minds see right through the thin veil of corporate socialization, masked as "education". The problem isn't the content so much as the context, which is the real lesson of primary and secondary schools. Lately, students have found a way out of the pedantic mind numbing drivel so often misrepresented as education.

[mooxim]

Could you link send me a link to a research paper investigating whether or not

"The reason teachers have problems engaging the attention of their students is that many young minds see right through the thin veil of corporate socialization"

It sounds like an interesting theory and I'd love to see the proof.

[BuffyNatalieGagaFan]

@mooxim YOU try sitting in class with a boring teacher. Seriously, if your students text under the table, it's no fault other than your own.

[martijnenco]

someone hafe to kill her!

[BenNCM]

someon should do the same to you

[cheeseit126]

this woman talks WAY TOO FAST

[BenNCM]

no she doesn't

[roidroid]

she makes valid points about the enforced gap between our lives and our work - especially of the lower class.

are we workers not human?

[intrepgun]

basically, yes. i mean, obviously you and i know different. but where the training of making a man a machine has been so effective, workers are not meant to be human, from a bosses point of view. we're rented, corn-fed meat.

[KaizokuSencho]

Faithbook? Faithbook?! Buddy Liths? Perthent?

[RDJim]

sounds like that mic is halfway down her throat. really annoying sound quality.

[sacapiloa]

st st stutter! haha, what an ending!

[JustMeAdrian1984]

I gotta pee

[MiraiHikki]

Well, I have to point out that I wouldn't want to see my bus driver looking at his or her phone while going somewhere.

[supajive]

i think any communication device that does not require physical communication ruins intimacy. I cant read body language or anything like that, not to mention if you are typing, u cant read the tone, sarcasm, stuff like that. fuck facebook, im, texting and everything inbetween. i physically call a person to make an appointment to MEET, not to chit chat.

[PVanderston]

I (largely) agree, and Ms. Broadbent's rebuttal misses the mark. Every moment spent browsing the digital ether or poking buttons on cell-phone -- sacrificing some extent of communicative depth for convenience -- detracts from the time spent interacting and developing intimate relationships with those around us. the relationships featured in her presentation, while perhaps strengthened by phone and internet access, certainly weren't built upon it. There must be a middle road here...

[whydizz]

I didn't think that was the least bit interesting. That's should be common knowledge that a lot of people text and email. I'm at work right now!!!

[Darvinisti]

Women have been trying to block the movement to a greater possibility of intimacy for millions of years!

[fish231uk]

I have....no......words.......

Brilliant.

[vsdamelio]

This is really good content. She is a highly intelligent person sharing her ideas. Though some of your comments are funny, they might be more welcome on the YouTube's "Miley Cyrus Skanky Sister." Not on a business thread for TED. Now attack me and tell me whatever you like, or jump off to a Creed Video.

[roidroid]

serious business thread is serious busines

[doloppost]

I'd say she'd have a interesting field day working in a supermarket behind the counter. It's been my personal observations that more and more people ignore the person handling their groceries, and have intimate conversations with their cellphones about where they are and the food they bought.

[Kojak7snap]

@doloppost This is an insulating thing, but while it cuts down on new meetings and interactions, it can also deepen existing relationships; communication that is banal to outsiders can be daily bread to those partaking of it.

[blizzardsuperfan]

I agree.[with her]

[sudiin]

All over the world public transport personel like bus drivers are forbidden to use mobiles, this isn't bad, guess what the reason is, and why many people want to have texting while driving made illegal.

This is just one bad example.

[ChainsawAllen]

She's just pissed cuz she's so ugly, no one will even fuck her over the internet.

I mean, i would.

But, nobody else would.

[kittykattykoo]

I'm on 10 hours of video chat with my boyfriend everyday. I don't know if this is healthy... But I'm dependent on it now.

[Crazee108]

wow, 10 hours?! how on earth do you have time to do anything else? please tell me you don't just sit there for 10 hours to talk, but you multitask.... and do other shit... right? O_O

[kittykattykoo]

Of course, I cook, I take shower, I do laundry, I study. I just leave the cam on so I feel like he's really around...

[ChouJunk]

Same here. I'm very much dependant on speaking with my boyfriend. Since we both live in different countries and can't see eachother for months.

[Allyredstar]

what is the clue to this video, it is about her observations which we all have, a nonsense video, waste of time

[baguiosky]

who has a right to [self ]determine attention--

who decide whether one/they should be isolated....

who is the controlling factor that's obvious ever since?

another grist for the mill blah blah.. thank you for the continuing work on awareness.

[davidesposito1]

she dosent realize that people need systems that help them be productive...something we havent come close to perfecting yet.

such a lack of control over communication can occur in a ROWE - but give people the ability to actually control their structural communication.

[ChrisRocksYourAnus]

niggers

[ph4rcyd3r]

meh

[planetdarwin]

1. Why is she glorifying something that is actually making us less social?

2. Bizarre camera framing at 2:17

3. Now you'll suddenly notice her breathing...

[canadianmaple09]

I was also disturbed by her using the example of public transit bus drivers not being allowed to use cell phones as a bad thing. I don't want someone with dozens of people's lives in their hands texting while they're driving. Texting or talking on a cell phone while driving is illegal in Ontario now. I think that's a good thing, not a bad thing.

[ratholin]

right it's been proven that cell driving is equivalent to drunk driving in the amount of reaction time lost.

[branboom]

Substantially longer actually.

[McPrfctday]

Her 'point' is not about politics or laws or endangerment of life.

[canadianmaple09]

think kids should be paying attention in school, not texting. I think people at work should be working, not connecting with their family (there are breaks and lunch time to do that). I don't think people in vehicles should be allowed to text or talk on phones. I understand what she is saying, that institutions try to limit personal communication and this is a bad thing, and I disagree with it.

[davidesposito1]

it will be possible in the future as mobiles become integrated with voice to text abilities and better speakerphones for them to have their mobiles on them and them become the equivalent to talking to the person next to you.

[McPrfctday]

4. You haven't listened or thought about it.

[creten69]

most of it is nonsensical chit chat and not at all connectedness. It's worse than the big bussiness model of living. It's like living in a commercial of an already psychotic workaholic merry go round. Neither is productive or soulfilled. Throw everything away and go live in the country and do hard work for body mind and soul.

[dragonstorm83]

I'm trying to listen to her, but her outfit is loud. What is she wearing?

[wallcrawler50]

Blue shirt with a white collar and white stripes. White pants and white shoes.

[dragonstorm83]

:P hehehe. thank you.

[creten69]

shes a hideous mongster

[ccm800]

focus. heehee

[Zetimenvec]

*foot

[guscaldas2]

Thanks for correcting me. English is not my first language and I am trying hard to learn it

[Zetimenvec]

If you're not being sarcastic then you're welcome. It was only an error in tense; college kids do it all the time. It's not something to worry about.

[gnikhilg]

the question is those who use technology to avoid face to face communication & who now have become dependent on this mediation even when they have the option of face to face. soon couples might prefer cyber sex with each other even when they are in the same house!-

[boorens18]

uh....no. I dont think people will prefer cyber sex to the real thing considering that sex is hard wired into the human brain. Thats quite a leap

[guscaldas2]

well said

[Zetimenvec]

not unless the cyber aspect can excite neurological pathways. I don't see that happening for a large percentage of peoples. In fact I'd be surprised if one in a million could pull it off.

[normskis69]

I get intimate using the internet ALL THE TIME!!!

Whooooooooooo Hooooooooooooo!!!

[pboisei]

I feel like I know this woman just from the video.

[sorealitttty]

and ppl are afraid the internet will void reality

we create reality, embrace the virtual :)

[paganiniGOGO]

The whole point of advanced comtech is to overcome 'barriers' like 'distance' and time.

You don't need research to show how that's done.

This really annoyed me.

[Zetimenvec]

comtech? who calls it that? I don't even know what that's supposed to mean. I can infer and have a hazy understanding of what I think you mean, but it seems archaic. Kind of like the huge amount of slang generated from the early internet.

"information super highway" comes to mind...

[popaddict]

LOL I was wondering what it mean as well. Like a trendy 90s computer slang. It is a rather catchy word though! comtech! :P

[paganiniGOGO]

This is almost as painful as the euphonium video.

[paganiniGOGO]

WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT OF THIS PRESENTATION?

THIS IS THE MOST BORING PIECE OF SHIT I'VE EVER WATCHED.

This woman is retarded.

[dabatjelly]

more realistically they should do a speech with a title like:

How the Internet Enables Crazies to Start Blogs...

YouTube: The New Nuthouse

Wikipedia: Everything but Facts

Google Image: Your Ultimate Porn Provider

[nestorrfortuna]

i work in nursing, my employer does not allow neither cellphones nor internet access.

i cannot tell you how much "vital" information we are preventing ourselves from getting, and the person that suffers is the patient.

[bmed19]

LOL WHAT A LOAD OF CRAP!!!!!

Work takes away our freedom that we are desparately trying to cling onto with moblie communication. the constraint on freedom isnt the lack of mobile communication but rather work itself!!!!!

[Paomnnehal]

I like the new intro :3

[lvecsey]

People taking care of tasks in the work place that are considered personal, actually save the company time. The reason is that if you lower the productivity of the employees by blocking access to certain things or even (gasp) their ability to research something on Google, you force them to do this while at home or another time. In some cases this is impossible but in the most immediate case it could mean they will be less rested and capable on the job going forward.

[Atoyota]

The problem here is simple.

The work place is not the environment for social or intimate activity. This much is elementary and I find it deeply troubling that this woman cannot understand the dangers a lack of focus could have for a bus driver and the safety of passengers (in one of her examples of fines for mobiles in hand)

Her other examples were completely appropriate, skyping with relatives or texting friends, but not in the workplace.

You are paid to work, not to party.

[newexperiment]

natural selection will automatically hurt the profits of businesses that don't properly monitor their employees. And that's about it.

[Monchanger]

@newexperiment: That's a very arbitrary and poorly worded argument. Please don't use evolutionary terms when making such lousy statements.

Before propagating more of this dictatorial big-brother nonsense you should take a step back and look at the growing trend of companies towards improving the "work/life balance" of their employees.

[newexperiment]

I should have set the market*.

And yes, the market shows there's value in improving work/life balance.

[paganiniGOGO]

If you think companies actually care about improving the lives of their employees, you're an idiot.

[fuckgodfuckyou]

Damn Straight.

Tell that to my boss.

[paganiniGOGO]

fuckgodfuckyou, I remember you. Small world. If you had a different username I wouldn't have though.

[Monchanger]

You assume I meant that employee happiness is an end-goal of companies, which was not what I said.

Did you even bother to look up "work/life balance"? Maybe you work in a minimum wage job doing mindless work. I don't and my mental state affects my output..

[paganiniGOGO]

I'm 30 years old, never had a job in my life, so I wouldn't know.

[FuManBoobs]

You are my hero!

[lwanatt]

awesome! tell me how you do it!

[paganiniGOGO]

still in University, and I live in a house my Italian parents bought me.

[Spitterkat]

lol

[BuffyNatalieGagaFan]

@paganiniGOGO And we care whyyy?

[paganiniGOGO]

@BuffyNatalieGagaFan

Why you care about something I wrote probably a year ago, I have no idea. I also have no idea what I wrote, but I was probably responding to a particular person.

[Atoyota]

/agreed except this is more cultural than specific to any one business.

And it's growing.

[adamredwine]

I agree that there are dangers in the case of drivers or factory workers while performing tasks that require concentration, but what about the factory worker that "stepped off the line" as she said? Or the bus driver waiting at the end of the line for 10 minutes? Is it really healthy to completely isolate people from their personal lives for the largest portion of their day? Isn't there safety value in people having stable mental lives?

[Atoyota]

exactly how did they cope before the 'cell'?

Just fine thankyou...

In fact a little more secular focus is beneficial, making one more independent and individually creative, which when combined with others later with others can improve everyone's daily experience in storytelling.

[adamredwine]

I don't buy it. Most people are not terribly deep thinkers and they aren't going to be any more focused if you take away their means of communication with the outside world. They'll just spend the 10 minutes staring at passing birds and listening to rock music.

Sure people coped "just fine" before the cell, but you might want to remember that in Jewish law a child born within 3 months of a husband's return home from abroad is legally his.... people cope with separation in a lot of ways.

[McPrfctday]

Aren't most people deep thinkers? Trust me, everyone is a philosopher... not just you.

[gotilk]

I admire your optimism.

[adamredwine]

:) I wish they were. I have been accused on more than one occasion of "thinking too much." Damned brain... I can't seem to get it to shut off.

[McPrfctday]

oops, I've been drunk on the internet again. I don't even remember watching this - no offence meant. I've recently given up drinking after 20 years solid... about 6 hours ago lol

[IWannabeJew]

Oh, and are you going to tell me that there isn't a double-standard, where the "highly compensated" employees are allowed to phone, email and IM all day long, but the plebes are not?

Unless you apply the prohibitions universally, she is correct in that you are essentially practicing "cock-blocking".

I couldn't count the number of great ideas I've lost because I couldn't take a few minutes with Google.

[Atoyota]

My main point was that the majority of texting is purely social or involves matter outside of work itself.

It is entirely appropriate when work related, but then how would you enforce that other than an honor system which we both know would be abused.

I do not support a double standard or cast system in who should text, I support a focus that is expected in return for compensation.

The technology is great, but it is making us too dependent, less self reliant in some cases.

In general

[adamredwine]

I appreciate all of the caveat's as it isn't a clear cut issue. I respect most of your points, but I would point out that generally we are not compensated for focus, we are compensated for completing tasks.... these things are not synonymous. I have been a teacher and worked with kids with ADD, there are times when allowing focus to shift can result in greater productivity than trying to force constant attention.

[Atoyota]

in all honesty, no one has complete focus, or it's very rare for extended periods.

People daydream, look out windows or 'think' in areas unrelated to work while at work. These distractions are usually good.

Work also is usually interrupted by breaks, as some have made the analogy of sharpening the knife to have more edge when they return to work.

This is all separate from introducing social from an outside source to the workplace. IOW's: TEXTING or 'phone calls'

AKA intimacy

[rflosi]

I've had Skype dinners.

[9noitulover]

i wonder how the road system works that they have set up, they only told us what they were doing, sort of. The talker wasn't very good, the thing at the end was more interesting.

[xenniex2]

good concept, but she isn't a very good talker ...

[Saesegral]

Does it matter that she isn't a very good speaker?

[gerry2345]

Not really...at least someone asked her on to TED.

[Monchanger]

No. Get over your need for scripts rewritten to death and CGI explosions. That or go present at TED yourself.

[Quitequill]

This is very interesting. I can understand why many institutions feel the need to block communication, but communication is extremely important for developing friendships and staying in touch. Many working adults become work-aholics due to extended periods with little or no human interaction. As long as a worker isn't completely ignoring his occupation, occasional personal calls and e-mails seem perfectly acceptable.

[KrakenZero]

Doesn't really get to an explanation of what constant contact with your intimate circle implies.

I would suppose people are becoming more removed and less interested in strangers because they have their preferred people at their side all of the time.

[elspoko]

Quite the opposite. Online communities are much easier to access than real-world communities, making sociability with others of like mind easier. Of course, people will stray away from certain groups, but we do that in real-world. We pick and choose who we speak to. Technology just allows us to have a broader selection.

[crimsoncoin]

Why is IBM using Big Blue for charging visitors to a city, why are visitors t all being charged for living and working in cities, r is this away of funding better building and access..hmm

[MMPANOS]

i love ted but i can't watch women talking ..

[blankz121]

O_O

[TheReasonWhyGuy]

um, ok? why?

[OliverWinton]

woot cybersex :)

[gangsterspatula]

i dont like her...she doesnt talk about any of the things that are bad from this kind of comunication....

[BaileysBeads]

Are there?

[shamefulidiot]

i find this very interesting, and very relevant. and quite coincidental to a certain degree.

[elspoko]

The folks who've looked upon technology as a source of human non-interaction now have to readjust their 'expert' analysis. It's doing quite the opposite. People who would normally just live their lives with no interaction at all with others, now form groups with others of like mind.

I'm glad to see that the doom and gloom most analyst always predict doesn't come to pass, clearly showing that these professionals need to get out of their offices and actually interact with society.

[KrakenZero]

Well the point of this talk was how the social networks are not promoting extended contact, Just maintaining the old ones.

[ferre347]

i love chatting with a friend so much!!

[supermaucat]

I didn't buy any of her arguments. None of them are strong and she completely avoids the cons of increased number of the communication channels.

[grit123]

Can you elaborate?

[AutodidacticPhd]

That's just the reality of an eight minute talk. All you have time to do is introduce a new point of view on a topic.

If you ask anyone at random what they have heard or think about private e-mail at work or texting from class, the only thing you'll hear are the negatives... I think that side of the argument already has plenty of voices.

[farhmoha]

nice vid ted