Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe: Junior Christian Science Bible Lesson

[Sozlled]

This reminds me of the hallucinations i used to get when i was a kid like 5 or 6 maybe. I'd take a high fever and hallucinate, i can't recall what i saw but this really reminds me of it.

When he said it is the closest thing to a nightmare he can think of, it's fucking not funny it's true. It's fucking beyond weird, beyond surreal, it's just fucked up, seriously fucked up.

[lordpyro1]

Please tell me somebody else saw the picture of shrek and fiona in the background at 1:07

[Verschrankung]

Probably isn't as remarkable to Brits but the shot of one of Liebe Hart's puppets at 0:48 with the BBC Four logo watermarked over it is one of the wierdest funniest things I've ever seen

[gnome95]

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII­IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII­IIIIIIIIIIIICK

[100cjkennedy]

GREAT JOB!

[SuperSexyChannel69]

I would really like to believe that DLH is just the biggest troll of all time, but I just don't think it's true. He would be the most devoted troll on the face of the planet.

[korynnleefx]

HOLY FUCK DAVID LIEBE HART LMAOOO

[WAAAAAAAAAAAY]

the guy at 4:15.....just wow

:)

[Burntcurry]

lol tim and eric

[norwegiantechnolover]

SAY NO TO DRUGS THERE! DON'T DO THE DRUGS THERE!!

[juggernautpresents]

love the visual effects! genius!

[ewandougie]

Maybe this is a premonition of Hell

[rossman2007]

erm its comedy lol



[Chrisgodoflard]

I guess he got high from cocaine instead of getting abducted by aliens. What does he have, mental illness.

[Rhademanthus]

holy shit

Andy Nyman was in Black Death!

'and now my lady loooove rots in an early grave!'

[berner]

@Rhademanthus *gets his machinegun ready*

[Rhademanthus]

I've fucking seen this guy in real life - he was singing outside whatever opera house was playing Gotterdammerung in LA. He had the horrible dog puppet with him.

[johnafirth]

I am so glad I'm an atheist if that's the image of God.

[Chrisgodoflard]

@johnafirth Yeah, because even though that I believe that god is an alien, this sounds ridicules.

[CybershotCollections]

Thats right kids! Don't do drugs! You'll end up making something like this! God, that was horrible!

[bistoha]

were they on drugs when they made this

[DarkLordoftheMeme]

Piss-poor anti-drugs campagining, whatever you might see on drugs it can't be much more disturbing than this show!

[zionravescene]

Is this where Andy Nyman got the inspiration for Jonty de Wolfe?

[RockBottomRiser21]

3:00 ffs I have to find the full version of that

[bigcherry99]

what is colonel gaddafi doing at 3:20 ?

[RyanTL85]

Salame!

[MagicalCarrot]

It's not even over!

I LOVE CHRISTMAS

I LOOOOOOOVE CHRISTMASSSSSSSS

[Derp1978]

CRAPED AND PISSED MYSELF WITH LAUGHTER!

[insideoutbarbie]

i've not laughed as much in ages. :')

[RLhockey203]

LOL same guy that makes tim and eric

[TheRandyChimp]

Who the fuck gave this guy airtime to make the Junior Christian Science Bible Lesson? It scared the fuck out of me and I've only seen clips!

[graemeoliver84]

David Liebe Hart's voice when he's voicing Albert Hermann reminds me a little bit of Scatman Crothers in The Shining (the scene where he's telling Danny what "shining" is)

[mastmedia]

Don't do drugs or you'll end up making wacked out bible programs.

[mastmedia]

LOL!!!

Sunshine Factory, eat your heart out!

[WallpaperViolence]

Oh dear God I do love Andy Nyman, he is an amazing man!

'he dragged them out of a childrens home fire'

[forwardrossa]

Haha i've just realised this is the same guy in Tim And Eric Awesome Show Great Job!

[omega123999]

OLOLOL CHRISTION ARE SO STOOPID :D

[thetoecutterr]

i remember meeting david, he told me tim and eric didnt pay him anything so i felt bad and gave him 20 bucks

[SkywaldHorrormood]

Godwin's Law states that any internet discussion eventually descends into somebody comparing somebody else to Hitler.

I propose an ancillary clause which states that sooner or later a Christian will turn up and start dribbling on about fairies.

[danutcase66]

@SkywaldHorrormood

Your Godwin's Law theory is a load of rubbish mate - you are talking out of your arse, just like Hitler did.

And anyway, the fairies of the Netherworld will take your soul for your ignorance ;)

[Misishaxi]

@danutcase66 it's not HIS theory. it's Godwin's.

[danutcase66]

@Misishaxi

Yes, because I obviously thought it was his theory despite the fact I said 'Godwin's Law theory'. Did it not enter your head that perhaps I used the second person possessive 'Your' to mean that he is quoting it and not that he invented the actual theory?

Sorry that you got confused.

[theonemurph]

oh shit, i just did some drugs there... too late

[Rikardw]

Was it only me that noticed Alberts ear swinging loose and actually dropping at one point?

[1985snowball]

@Rikardw Probably the result of a late payment when his ex wife's dealer came round.

[firedrake300]

....we....are....fucked....!

[ArtRockRules]

Andy Nyman looks like Paul F Tompkins.

[goreesha]

David Liebe Hart is awesome. If this is the worst kind of religious indoctrination, I'll take more please.

[bookworm3583]

Andy Nyman makes this so much funnier with his commentary.

[WelcomeToMyLife91]

This the worst kind of religious indoctrination.

[lurconis666]

It is just like The Ring. Once you've seen this, it's in forever. It's not going anywhere.

[TonyBranston]

@lurconis666 I was about to ask if I was the only one seeing actual video and if everyone else was just watching static.

[LordBifford]

@lurconis666 Well, if that puppet crawls out of the screen, I'll just step back two meters and it will fall apart.

[LordBifford]

1:19 This guy doesn't sing. He just lip synchs his puppets to a CD.

[LordBifford]

The show is even worse than this guy suggests. Look at a full length clip of the show on YouTube. It's horribly planned and thought out.  The actors argue over what song or passage they should be doing because they didn't prepare or rehearse anything. Also, when they change the backdrops, some of the actors' body parts disappear because they were wearing clothes that matched the bluescreen.

[SlumberCloud]

@LordBifford not to mention the constant click sound of the puppets mouth, and the puppets body parts falling off

[soulman35]

Angelo9123 is the rational voice on here.

[KangaKucha]

that just makes me want to do drugs, like marijuana, even more.

heck I bet the people that did this were high on something...

[KittyHippy]

Albert's ear falls off at 2:00...o_O

[xeractus]

AAAGHHHHH MY EYESSS MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP

[UpperCrustthe3rd]

@ross011101 You have it all wrong.This is from The Junior Christian Science Bible lesson show created by David Liebe Hart from the 90s - 2007ish. David Liebe Hart also performs with his puppets outside the HolidayBowl where he can be found frequently. He's sometime's at the La Brea tar pits drawing characitures for 5 bucks.This isnt from Tim and Eric. Although Tim and Eric's people found him at the holiday bowl and put him on there show. And Tim and Eric and David are now good friends.

[ross011101]

@UpperCrustthe3rd so was this ment to take the piss in the 1st place or what? lol

[UpperCrustthe3rd]

@ross011101 This isn't a joke. 

[ross011101]

This is from the Tim and Eric show folks.... look it up

[rockerjones]

Count Smokula on accordion doing his best Andy Nyman impression!

[TheLogos1]

I don't know which is weirder; the ear popping off or the puppet who was missing an arm.

[CollosalCarnage08]

I can't unsee it D:

Oh jesus I can't unsee it.

[ivanisavich]

Holy fucking hell I laughed so hard when the black puppet's ear flew off.

[FatPopCorn]

2:00 what was that, that feel off..was that .the puppets ear?

[byScrooby]

"God: Hidden Science" - Google it!

[digvoldon]

the accordian guy looks like the man in the suit from Carnival Of Souls. I seriously wouldn't watch this show at night.

[kuroistuc]

The Halloween music is strangely appropriate here... A disturbing programme indeed :P

[ScotsmanRS]

Maybe the message was, "If you do drugs, everything will look like this weird show. You'll get delusional, causing you to see people as badly animated puppets, hear people playing alien guitar music, and believe in such nonsense as god or 'the power of prayer'."

[LikaLaruku]

This show is the kind of thing you have to be stoned to watch, even if it keeps telling you not to do drugs.

[zionravescene]

@ _ @

[tommacko]

Salame!

[InsaneTaco]

Albert Herman is hawt

[fatalrob0t]

This actually doesn't look nearly as surreal as some children's television I grew up with and things I've seen as of late. The guy's voice is fine, the dolls are weird, the quality is... poor... but overall it's not nearly as bad as I thought it would be by the way the guy was starting off on it.

[tellyisrubbish]

Amen to that : )

[joyboy1985]

i only watch this show when im high as a kite.

[simonfb10]

Say no to drugs there, dont do the drugs there................Ok then skip!

[burninbushmen]

my day is much brighter now. this is why i love YT.

can u take me off the enemy list now please......it's getting old.

[SubconsciousAlive]

I shat myself.

[jjwebster1]

do you have to be american to get this show? I watched it and know that they are speaking english but to this poor english man it comes across as gobbledy gook

[LtZerge]

WTF?!

5stars for drug value.

[949matty]

I saw Tim and Eric live at the Grove!!

[sherbertscoop]

My favorite race is the Corinians and when they say hello and goodbye they say, "Salame!"

[quigonnjon]

SALAMAY!!!!

[scotty88hh]

dumb brits dont get it

[legolas11795]

dont get what?

[rtsjoe]

Ha ha, that's so funny.

[qwertyuiopdan1]

"dumb brits dont get it" as opposed to americans who are world renowned genii

[scotty88hh]

not what i meant, they don't realize the genius of this show

[qwertyuiopdan1]

of screenwipe or the junior christian brainwashing bible

[scotty88hh]

why the brainwashing puppets of course!

[sirmattbelios]

I don't want to go to bed because i KNOW i'm gonna have nightmares about this little gang...

[lshaw17]

I almost pissed myself when i saw the guy in an alien mask with a guitar Good God, Why? Heard the guy who makes that show thought he was abducted by aliens but just WTF

[TheConciseStatement]

"The puppets that he has... FUCKING dragged out of burnt out buildings..."

LMAO!

[gefan3]

I never knew there was quite that much LSD in the world.

[FuzzyDuck]

David Liebe Hart's show on the BBC?!

[zab666]

I just found out that guy @ 4:20 who looks like a clown is called count smokula and famous in the us....hmhmhm

[MadForColors]

Not having a god and promoting for it is te same as having a god and promoting for it. Atleast maybe it's just me, but most against-religion people talk about thier beliefs and promote them just as the religious do, it's almost as it's a religion itself...

though i have nothing against chritanity, but this show it creepy

i feel stupid trying to teach english to its original users, so the retards who think this is brainwash, brainwashing means mental torture 'till they convince, idiots

[starcalibre]

oh shut the fuck up there's an atheist-christian slapfight on ever other fucking video out there can we at least keep this shit out of screenwipe vids

[keef82]

well said starcalibre

[ZdPhoenix]

Brainwashing:

1.a method for systematically changing attitudes or altering beliefs, originated in totalitarian countries, esp. through the use of torture, drugs, or psychological-stress techniques.

2. any method of controlled systematic indoctrination, esp. one based on repetition or confusion: brainwashing by TV commercials.

*sigh*

[jeunesse1979]

my life has diverged to a new purpose; i want to be the man behind the alien mask and £20 Home Bargains guitar

[Warcrftaddict]

Christian madscientists aren't sweet like normal mad scientists because they dont create frankenstine instead they just practice theology :(

[Waldvogel91]

Oh my God!

[Laserp0rn]

Or to horrify people at Guantanamo Bay.

[Luka1990Croat]

You brainwashed idiot!

Having puppets preach the Bible to children is cheap and deceiving!

[gatenbee]

Say no to drugs there, don't do the drugs there.

[Brianuk85]

they dont need 2 do drugs coz its like ther on drugs by watching this crap

[Laserp0rn]

But feel free to do them here.

[starcalibre]

Such as coctaine, pot, heroin all that bad stuff

[riken1]

(Deep voice) it's all bad!

[SlumberCloud]

@gatenbee it's all bad

[animegalc4]

@gatenbee Do drugs HERE.

[TheHonestTheist]

/watch?v=fFH0khjgA0U

[JimGrim90]

You can actually see a full 20 minutes of this here on youtube. It's funny at first but then it just starts to get creepy.

For the record, my parents never instilled any kind of belief into me. They didn't even tell me whether they believed in god or not, (Not that I asked), I just figured out over time that they don't. I think this did me good as I formulated my own opinions and beliefs.

[seekirk]

That is funny. I never heard of the show until now. It is funny!!!!

[JoopsTz]

I believe the real Christian Science church tried to get this guy to change the name of his show so it wouldn't be confused with Christian Science. I can see why!

[destructorcreator]

Trust fucking YouTube to take something as funny as this and reduce it to a pack of arguments. Piss off, all of you.

[up2trix]

@destructorcreator calm down, don't read the comments if you get annoyed.

[Angelo9123]

Both funny and disturbing. In case anyone wonders - this has nothing at all to do with the Christian Science movement, which couldn't really be the source of such strange antics and also of the respected Pulitzer prize winning newspaper the Christian Science Monitor!

[cilitbang]

shut up

[Pikapoo1]

I laughed at 2:00

[DKqwerty]

I also have the God given right to say yes to any and all of those things.

[TheDancingCookie]

Andy Nyman is hot!

[Bwentman]

Hahahaha. Now I see why Tim and Eric want David Liebe Hart on their show. Fucking great.

[iloveallecchianime]

yeah but they dont use him as much anymore... lets hope hes on season 4

[molzey123]

This is so fucked up.

Hahahaha. bring de panda aliiiiiiive

[tom656]

I'm crying with laughter

[katewilhelmi]

Ouch! One of the most painful things I've ever watched! Personal favorite moment is at 2:01, when the puppet shakes his ear off.

[Dominicokey]

I know!!

[Dominicokey]

In a way this show sums up how stupid religion is (in particular Christianity).

[Precipitation]

Christian Science and Christianity are not by any stretch of the imagination the same thing.

[Dominicokey]

I can understand that, however it is still completely hilarious.

[Precipitation]

That was my point: As a Christian I do not want to be associated with this. This thing is just unbelievable.

[Dominicokey]

As an atheist, I think worshipping a god (hence the no capitals for 'g') is unbelievable. I think you should worship Gandalf from Lord of the Rings. There is more chance of him being real.

[Precipitation]

Okay, then.

[JTownSmith]

lol how so? JRR tolkein the wrighter of lord of the rings is was devout catholic.

Besides no one is truly atheist.

[Dominicokey]

I am truly atheist. Also, it is writer not wrighter. He was a devout catholic because, like the rest of religious people, were brainwashed when young.

Can you explain how 'no one is truly atheist' ?

[JTownSmith]

Sorry about mispelling writer but it was midnight when i wrote this and midnight when i made this one as well.

Anyway Tolkein converted to Catholicism so your wrong there.

Now lets take a look at arrogancy of this "Brainwashed when young" Im sorry but the whole westerd world CONVERTED long time ago no one was brainwashed.

Philosphy derrives meaning something ATheism cant without becoming a nihilist and trying to commit suicide.

[Dominicokey]

How can you describe taking children to church? Making children going to faith schools? It is brainwashing.

[JTownSmith]

Most children i know somewhat enjoy going to church to see their friends for an extra day. Its not like something kids are forced to do.

Then Wouldnt it be brainwashing for an Atheist telling his or her child that there is no god while they are young? You always subject your children with your opinions and your ideas, doesnt have anything to do with religion. Children tend to be somewhat like their parents.

Continued:

[JTownSmith]

CONTINUED

Anyway, the Greatest christian philosphers all converted and were never raised christian. St Augustus was atheist before he converted to christianity in his 30s. CS Lewis was Atheist till he converted to Theism then Christianity.

Its not something you are born and raised with, there is actual merit to something of an existance of a god. Einstein himself was a Theist.

[Dominicokey]

My point is that children ARE brainwashed. Adults/Parents do force their children to go to Church or whatever religious building. Children are always labelled "Christian children" or "Jewish children" yet, I am sure those children have not decided if they wanted to follow those religions - you don't label a child a "Tory child" as if they are automatically a Conservative supporter because of their parents.

[JTownSmith]

Lol Thats like saying Atheists brainwash their kids that spiritual people are just backwards medieval freaks. An atheist instills his beliefs in his child and a Christian instills his belief in his. What is so different in that?

[Mysterious0Bob]

Oh shut the fuck up. The only thing worse than a fundamentalist religious type is a a fundamentalist atheist. At least annoying religious types believe in something. You atheist tossers are just being cunts for the sake of it.

Everyone has their own beliefs. Don't fucking force them on people who don't want them.

[sniffysmooth]

You don;t know what the fuck you are talking about and you just proved it. First you say " at least annoying religious types believe in something" -implying that atheist don't ( I presume), and then you say "everyone has their own beliefs".

And by saying this you are qualifying people's beliefs, that is, you acknowledge belief in something that many find ridiculous (i.e. a biblical god) while at the same time disqualifying the latter's views wholly. You are a fucking FASCIST!

[AK2927]

My problem with Birdcage Guy is that he's just not funny. He just tells us what's going on on the screen, rather like one of those

"100 best..." programmes that CB is normally so scathing about.

[mgrh001]

well, no not really. Even if that was a proper argument, which it isn't, it wouldn't make sense. He talked about it and the editors of the show added the clips on top. So he wouldn't have known they would but the clips on after necessarily.

[AndrianGo]

We control the vertical and the horizontal... You're about to step into the "Twilight zone..."

[glod666]

Isnt "we control the vertical and the horizontal" from the intro to 'the outer limits' not 'the twilight zone'?

[bleedingmonky002]

I live for public access, It really is like a whole genre based on Lynch.

[naomi94]

this is scary

[GEERUP]

O.k. bad production and the puppets are Dated and the talent is Low. But Come on. Who's the Man sitting in His bird cage as the Over the top reactionary critic. Snickering like a 7 year old school boy who discovered He can poll wings off a fly. And the Exorcist sound track in the back ground. MORE Pandering to the Godless prideful presumption that this puppet show is worse that a horror film? Get off your worn out bash any and all Christians kick it's poor form.

[Gnug215]

If you notice, he hardly criticizes the Christian aspect of it, but mostly mentions the appearance of the dolls, the voice, the alien aspect (!) and the fact that it looks scary (which I think is relevant, since it's a children's program).

He's not bashing Christianity, the show just happens to be a Christian one, so I don't see the need for your seeming outrage.

Maybe you should get off your can't-take-any-criticism kick. It's as if you feel personally attacked by this video.

[johnpizarelli89]

Following on from Gnug215's comment, Andy Nyman is a very successful actor, writer/director and I think given the nature of Charlie Brooker's programme and the large amount of knowledge he has on such subjects, it was kind of obvious he'd launch a scathing attack on this.

It simply makes good T.V and you can't fault that. The exorcist soundtrack is also just another dramatic device they've used to exaggerate the programme too!

[Dominicokey]

I was laughing just as much, if not more than the so called "over reactionary critic"

[ScientiaVeritasEtLux]

What a disturbing show. I just might get nightmares from those puppets.

[EchetusXe]

what an odd show