Darn man. At first I thought this was going to be a surrealistic piece, kind of like something Magritte would make. But it's a lot more true to life and brutal.
Nice work. It's not easy saying disturbing things that need to be said.
Horrific conclusion to this amazing piece. War makes one do crazy, inhumane acts. Not sure what sent the shiver up my spine, reading about what happened or the seemingly dead-pan manner in which the guy told you about it. I can understand being detached and dispassionate about such an atrocity is the only way to get through it. We need to know these things, what was and is being done in our name. Powerful writing, Roy, as with all good writing the memory lingers long after the reading. Thanks
Thanks for that. I often worry that even telling what happened is horrific in and of itself. But unless we deal with War as a series of acts, all of which have profound consequences, then we'll never be able to put an end to it. Which is my goal.
it is better to live in the positive world.Not that rose coloured glasses are very safe just that there a prettier view. Keepin it on the + side.I guess it's like you said.."we are all teachers" and we are all students.
Thanks for sharing. I think I have watched this already, but I don't seem to have commented, which is odd as I make a habit of commenting.
Amazing piece; very dark, the way you emphasise the horror by contrasting it with the mundane is powerful.
Have you watched 'Grave of the Fireflies'? Along with Otto Dix's etchings I consider it to be one of the most effective anti-war artworks I have yet encountered; your poem reminded me of it.
In case I have not done so already, ***** and favourite.
really powerful reportage, by the way. i was afraid to look, considering the title, but finally did and, hair raising as this account may be, i could not turn away. you give a perspective that makes the the bare, unbearable truth of the memories this man lives with in his head somehow possible to hear with only sorrow, or pity- not hate, for the horror haunted soldier. he's not a brute, he's ordinary, but what you give us is the brunt of the brutality of his life, as an ordinary soldier.
Veterans of stupid wars are like victims of protracted child abuse, survivors of ritual torture and child sacrifice cults you read about, where whole towns, the cops, churches, teachers and parents are complicit in the systemic exploitation and physical and psychological maiming of their own children, and the children born into the torture think that's just how things are. I can't thank our soldiers for being rooked into the lie that war ever eradicates anything but life, peace & sanity.
You polish your lenses and sharpen your pencil with military precision when you go out in the world.
My eldest is to be commissioned an officer in April, I shall go to his passing out parade with that weapon you and I have in common-"the squat pen rests snug as a gun" (Seamus Heaney)
Ordinary brutality. Which brute is wrong? Are brutes ever right? Great example of a small window revealing glory, here I should say gory. An excellent, insightful poem.
As an aside, not unrelated, I very much enjoyed tinySpectacle's reading of "A Palestinian Boy". My favourite of your poems to date.
This one is bursting with complexity. First of all, it must have been tough to keep that withheld in his head, plaguing him so much that he just blurted it out like that... simply, as calm as the air diffuses. Then again how does one respond to that? Those words just echo in the silence. But what does one say in that case? I don't know how I would have reacted in that scenario. This left me a bit uneasy, but I do have to say it was a stirring and potent piece.
It is shocking how the circumstances of war sometimes enables a person to commit barbaric acts that they will regret their entire lives. It is sad to see a person live and die with such regrets. The acts are repulsive yet one cannot condemn the individual entirely because one was not there, did not walk in the footsteps, it would all be hypothetical. I think I have more to say but I will leave it like this because I have not fully organized my thoughts. Thanks for sharing it with us Roy. Wow.
Excellent. this line makes me jealous:"Snow dusts his shoulders as if/ gratuitous beauty is what follows mayhem and killing/ in the service of a cause." The situation, the tension and the poem's personal view makes us see the issue intimately. It's really very perfect right up to your choice of line at the end.
Gil Scott-Heron said that Americans are easily shocked.They ought to be,if they got ears.
One who feels human and listens,they should hear/read your poem and they will be moved,sick but grateful that one can still get sick,thanks for a woderful poem,& for your reading.
It does make you question... everything, when we cease being the "benevolent peacekeeper" as Robert Byrd put it and change, in the eyes of individuals, into something monstrous. I think of all that I've learned of My Lai and never want to repeat. Hopefully we move onwards, blindly or not, into a better future for our country, for our race, maybe developing a universal sense of human pride along the way. You've got it all figured out, Roy, this if life-writing.
I so don't have it all figured out. I'm just one more voice saying, Hey, that's bullshit.
A chorus of such voices is what I hope for, what I dream of. I'm not as interested in being right as I am seeing this country find itself. And, to me, that means find reasons to make peace with those we'd rather not even have anything to do with--as in the case of Afghanistan and the Taliban.
Thanks, Marcel. (I hate to keep harping on Vietnam, but those in power seem intent on dragging us through the same morass over and over, and I think it's up to us to say, as Obama did at one of his speeches, Enough.)
Afghanistan war is entirely neccasary, the Taliban have to be eradicated or the people of Afganistan will be permantently stuck in the dark ages. As for Obama... I wonder what he means when he says "The game will change" once Iran has possesion of Nuclear weapons. Nevertheless, soldiers are cold brutes. ... Thank God.
I don't disagree with the fact that soldiers need to be cold, tough killing-machines. Note: I thanked the guy. My job as a writer, however, is to report.
I hear you loud and clear on Afghanistan. But I told my son recently--as he contemplates joining the military--that war may be more than we can handle. Historically, those types of terrain are a huge factor in the favor of the locals.
I appreciate your comment. And I thank you for giving this piece a fair hearing.
Darn man. At first I thought this was going to be a surrealistic piece, kind of like something Magritte would make. But it's a lot more true to life and brutal.
Nice work. It's not easy saying disturbing things that need to be said.
theboombody 2 years ago
Horrific conclusion to this amazing piece. War makes one do crazy, inhumane acts. Not sure what sent the shiver up my spine, reading about what happened or the seemingly dead-pan manner in which the guy told you about it. I can understand being detached and dispassionate about such an atrocity is the only way to get through it. We need to know these things, what was and is being done in our name. Powerful writing, Roy, as with all good writing the memory lingers long after the reading. Thanks
andrewnorris1 2 years ago
Thanks for that. I often worry that even telling what happened is horrific in and of itself. But unless we deal with War as a series of acts, all of which have profound consequences, then we'll never be able to put an end to it. Which is my goal.
Roy
twohawksfucking 2 years ago
Wild ..
twocooltwo 2 years ago
I'll second that--some parts of this life are just what they are. And I'm with you: the word 'wild' pretty much covers it.
And thanks for giving this a look and a hearing.
Roy
twohawksfucking 2 years ago
This is a volume of tragedy I cannot fathom how it could be contained, in any way. You tell the tale well, I saw myself there.
"Snow dusts his shoulders as if
gratuitous beauty is what follows mayhem and killing in the service of a cause."
Thanks for bringing this poem to my attention, Roy.
chevkoch 2 years ago
again-one of yer best-I thought of Forche's The Colonel.*****
exesquire 2 years ago
Just back again.Love it!
mindovermatter2009 3 years ago
Welcome back.
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
I viewed this before-but it's really good-
powerful effective of course troubling-*****
hhhaller 3 years ago
it is better to live in the positive world.Not that rose coloured glasses are very safe just that there a prettier view. Keepin it on the + side.I guess it's like you said.."we are all teachers" and we are all students.
mindovermatter2009 3 years ago
I love this...
TheILLiteratePoet 3 years ago
Thanks for sharing. I think I have watched this already, but I don't seem to have commented, which is odd as I make a habit of commenting.
Amazing piece; very dark, the way you emphasise the horror by contrasting it with the mundane is powerful.
Have you watched 'Grave of the Fireflies'? Along with Otto Dix's etchings I consider it to be one of the most effective anti-war artworks I have yet encountered; your poem reminded me of it.
In case I have not done so already, ***** and favourite.
RowanFortuneWood 3 years ago
Thank you, Rowan. Especially for giving it a second hearing!
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
Very strong, worth another listen.
dashpoet 3 years ago
a slice of reality. such a sad and brutal world this is sometimes. the irony is not lost. 5*****
Paul
PaulBradford13 3 years ago
Thank you, Paul. Our country is fortunate that its defenders are as selfless as they are, as willing to sacrifice so much for so little reward.
That said, is War the monster or are humans?
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
ps that quote was a lyric by joe jackson.
rpVerlaine 3 years ago
(I did not know that "Shoeless Joe" wrote lyrics; you learn something every day!)
Seriously, thank you so much.
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
Ecellent and favorited. 5 stars
"lets have a war between the sexes and nobody will be left"
the best
rp
rpVerlaine 3 years ago
really powerful reportage, by the way. i was afraid to look, considering the title, but finally did and, hair raising as this account may be, i could not turn away. you give a perspective that makes the the bare, unbearable truth of the memories this man lives with in his head somehow possible to hear with only sorrow, or pity- not hate, for the horror haunted soldier. he's not a brute, he's ordinary, but what you give us is the brunt of the brutality of his life, as an ordinary soldier.
medicinesocks 3 years ago
You remind me why I write. And for that--and this incredible rendering of the intent of the poem--I am deeply grateful.
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
Veterans of stupid wars are like victims of protracted child abuse, survivors of ritual torture and child sacrifice cults you read about, where whole towns, the cops, churches, teachers and parents are complicit in the systemic exploitation and physical and psychological maiming of their own children, and the children born into the torture think that's just how things are. I can't thank our soldiers for being rooked into the lie that war ever eradicates anything but life, peace & sanity.
medicinesocks 3 years ago
My latest bumper-sticker slogan that I live by is: Well, at least they're not waterboarding me today.
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
You polish your lenses and sharpen your pencil with military precision when you go out in the world.
My eldest is to be commissioned an officer in April, I shall go to his passing out parade with that weapon you and I have in common-"the squat pen rests snug as a gun" (Seamus Heaney)
PoetLina 3 years ago
Ordinary brutality. Which brute is wrong? Are brutes ever right? Great example of a small window revealing glory, here I should say gory. An excellent, insightful poem.
As an aside, not unrelated, I very much enjoyed tinySpectacle's reading of "A Palestinian Boy". My favourite of your poems to date.
dashpoet 3 years ago
Thanks, Mark. That means a great deal to me...
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
This one is bursting with complexity. First of all, it must have been tough to keep that withheld in his head, plaguing him so much that he just blurted it out like that... simply, as calm as the air diffuses. Then again how does one respond to that? Those words just echo in the silence. But what does one say in that case? I don't know how I would have reacted in that scenario. This left me a bit uneasy, but I do have to say it was a stirring and potent piece.
IvyBedouin9 3 years ago
It is shocking how the circumstances of war sometimes enables a person to commit barbaric acts that they will regret their entire lives. It is sad to see a person live and die with such regrets. The acts are repulsive yet one cannot condemn the individual entirely because one was not there, did not walk in the footsteps, it would all be hypothetical. I think I have more to say but I will leave it like this because I have not fully organized my thoughts. Thanks for sharing it with us Roy. Wow.
IvyBedouin9 3 years ago
Excellent. this line makes me jealous:"Snow dusts his shoulders as if/ gratuitous beauty is what follows mayhem and killing/ in the service of a cause." The situation, the tension and the poem's personal view makes us see the issue intimately. It's really very perfect right up to your choice of line at the end.
tinySpectacle 3 years ago
Jealousy in a writer is a great thing; it fuels the next thing a writer does, so look out.
And thank you, Lo. I'll be sending you some books. (New chapbook, a couple of full-length collections I just ordered.)
Feeling awful good tonight; I love what you did with that poem. (Tom once pleased me like that, made me glad I'd lived that long.)
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
Gil Scott-Heron said that Americans are easily shocked.They ought to be,if they got ears.
One who feels human and listens,they should hear/read your poem and they will be moved,sick but grateful that one can still get sick,thanks for a woderful poem,& for your reading.
hhhaller 3 years ago
this really touched down on me
brilliant
not just your style, which I find unusual and fascinating, but also the way you show just the right things to move mountains. loved it. favorited
koryargonic 3 years ago
Thank you, Kory.
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
It does make you question... everything, when we cease being the "benevolent peacekeeper" as Robert Byrd put it and change, in the eyes of individuals, into something monstrous. I think of all that I've learned of My Lai and never want to repeat. Hopefully we move onwards, blindly or not, into a better future for our country, for our race, maybe developing a universal sense of human pride along the way. You've got it all figured out, Roy, this if life-writing.
jevoshawke13 3 years ago
I so don't have it all figured out. I'm just one more voice saying, Hey, that's bullshit.
A chorus of such voices is what I hope for, what I dream of. I'm not as interested in being right as I am seeing this country find itself. And, to me, that means find reasons to make peace with those we'd rather not even have anything to do with--as in the case of Afghanistan and the Taliban.
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
Remember GI JOES!
Unpermitted importation of body parts
is PROHIBITED.
Museums readily accepting specimen donations.
Absolutely DISCREET.
WetlandsRemediation 3 years ago
That was really powerful. I love your delivery. 5* and Fav.
RowanFortuneWood 3 years ago
Thanks. It's always risky, saying What in the hell are we thinking?
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
great piece roy! ***** !
DavidRandallCurtis 3 years ago
Thanks, David.
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
for some reason it reminds me Hercules, and the quote about those who live for times of war, nice piece *****stars;)
Kabuki0009 3 years ago
Thanks, Marcel. (I hate to keep harping on Vietnam, but those in power seem intent on dragging us through the same morass over and over, and I think it's up to us to say, as Obama did at one of his speeches, Enough.)
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago
Afghanistan war is entirely neccasary, the Taliban have to be eradicated or the people of Afganistan will be permantently stuck in the dark ages. As for Obama... I wonder what he means when he says "The game will change" once Iran has possesion of Nuclear weapons. Nevertheless, soldiers are cold brutes. ... Thank God.
UntamedBlueLight 3 years ago
I don't disagree with the fact that soldiers need to be cold, tough killing-machines. Note: I thanked the guy. My job as a writer, however, is to report.
I hear you loud and clear on Afghanistan. But I told my son recently--as he contemplates joining the military--that war may be more than we can handle. Historically, those types of terrain are a huge factor in the favor of the locals.
I appreciate your comment. And I thank you for giving this piece a fair hearing.
Roy
twohawksfucking 3 years ago