THE SEX TALK: WHEN IS IT TIME? (MNShow 12)

[TheTacosAreHere]

cont. We may have some grief from my mom if Dri breastfeeds after a year, but like you said this is our choice, not societies (or our mothers). As for when we will talk about sex, we will decide when that time comes. We are a very open family and I believe that was what caused me to not have sex in high school. When she asks we will decide then and there how to tell her based on age and how much she wants to know.

[TheTacosAreHere]

I am vowing to post on every video tonight. Lol But I needed to first say I LOVE HOW OPEN YOU ARE, even as a religious momma. It is so refreshing. You say it how it is. On the whole breastfeeding after 1 thing, my mom is against it (even though she is very pro breastfeeding, i don't know, mom's are crazy lol). My daughter is 10 months and I am letting her decide when to quit, we are very pro attachment parenting.

[jadeddrifter]

My mom gave me a basic human anatomy book and a short article about married love when I was 12. The anatomy book didn't explain the mechanics. It wasn't until high school when other kids were graphically describing various escapades that I connected the dots. To this day my mother doesn't like to talk about sex. I plan to teach my son about sex honestly in an age-appropriate way when he asks, emphasizing love and trust. I think kids should understand by age 12 when they are about to hit puberty.

[everythingmatthew]

My mom told me at 9

[pinkiemew]

I was never given the sex talk. I'm 16 I found out everything the hard way. but I'm not close to my family. I'm closer to my dog more than them. everytime I open up to them they ask and ask and ask me questions or make fun of me. so I keep my life in a bottle.

[ksaldivar89]

i can remember when exactly when i found out what sex was but i now that i think about it it was way toooo early. i think my mom broke it all down about the time that i was 9 . as far as teaching my kids i think i will do it early but not sure exactly when yet

[QuercusSola]

My mom was breastfed in the sixties. Her mom (my grandma) thought the then ultra popular formula was ridiculous, and so unnatural! I was breast fed as well!

[HalfBloodPrincess217]

I was told when I was 11. -_- I know right? Then I got super curious and around 13 when I got my iPod... Yeah I had to see for my self... I'm totally telling my kids when I have them around 7 maybe

[betosrose]

My son is 6 so the sex talk is comming up soon. I realized it was time when we were talking about babies (I was pregnant). I had said something about god puts the baby in mommy's belly and he responded by saying, "No mommy, I know the truth." I was mortified! I asked him "How do babies end up in mommy's belly then?" His response? SEX! I asked what sex was and his response was when mommies and daddies kiss. So yea, it's time. I just need to figure out how to do it!

[tigerlilly699]

I think having a sex talk in kindergarden is rediculous and for the school to tell our children is outrageous! It's a parents responsibility to tell their children. I believe if you tell a child to young can awaken something in them that shouldn't be. That is why some children grab or do inappropriate things to or infront of other kids. I think it should go by maturity (and we all know kindergardners don't have that).

[jennerbug27]

I was in 2 grade when I found out, in vulgarity, how babies come to be. Although we knew correct terms for and respect of body parts from my parents. I think at any age, children can be introduced by parents to information regarding sex, but in appropriate amounts. If they ask, answer in truth. But I think it is important for parents to be proactive in providing that information. I really love this giveaway. My heart breaks for Jennifer but she is really doing amazing for those babies!

[mackinthedoo]

My mother was always very open with me and my siblings. She was willing to give me information on any subject, but it wasn't until I asked HER about a suggestively sexual comment made by one of my 5th-grade peers meant, and she told me the truth. I was completely grossed out and really never wanted to talk about it again, but her honesty was enough to always let me know she was there if I had any other questions.

[jollyjess6]

That story about Jennifer is so touching. I was able to donate about 800 oz to two babies. I'm nursing my 15 month old and I get a lot of pressure to wean. It really makes me hmm and haw about it. I started learning about sex early on and I think it helped create open dialog with my mom. I have never had a problem asking questions so I will be doing the same thing with my child.

[bernice2129]

Thank you for sharing with us the story of Jennifer Coias - it really moved me. I will help her as much as I can.

[h09]

My mom told me around 6 or 7. Like all children, I was naturally curious and she had no qualms with telling me the truth. She's a guidance counselor, so I feel like I grew up in an open environment. My parents always encouraged my brother and I to ask questions. I plan on being that same kind of parent to my babies one day. :)

[jeanandcoltansmommy]

I also think that when they are able to ask then they are able to handle an answer I will use as little detale as I can and then the more questions the more answers they will get! And if they don't ask I will make sure to tell them by the time the start middle school because around here that is when they start having sex not all but alot!!! I learned about sex from my girlfriends in highschool and really just when they started to presure me into having sex my self I was 17 my first time so .....

[MommaBeiler]

batman top 5?!? i will be talking to my children about sex when they start asking questions. I do not lie to them about anything. If they ask I will tell them age appropriately the answer to their questions.

[lizseibert2436]

i think 7 or 8 is a great age. my parents never really talked to me about it. i became super curious and almost overly sexual at a young age...i also did some things at the age of 14 in relation to this topic...that has changed my life and will affect my marriage forever. i think that could have been avoided if i was talked to about it and given more reasons for high self esteem, instead of looking for attention in ways i shouldnt have.

[GPipee]

sex as they grow so nothing is a big shock or this taboo that they are not meant to know about.

[GPipee]

Jennifer coias is amazing. i pump milk for my friend who has breast cancer and has had a double mastectomy, but this is nothing compared to the selfless and generous gift that she is giving these children. I hope she can continue to grieve and celebrate Jude this way. my mum gave me the big sex talk when i was 10. It was a big thing for her. I plan on keeping my kids informed about

[answeracer]

I havn't been getting your videos in my box :(

[joelface]

So much respect for Jennifer Coias. I hope people will help her with her cause, because it is currently making such a HUGE difference for children who really need it.

As for the other question (about teaching children about sex) My stance is that the earlier the better.. we should NEVER lie to our children as not only will it confuse them and eventually teach them that sex is not something they can talk to you about, they'll learn that you LIE to them.. and that's not good.

They CAN handle it.

[candyformandy]

I think I was like 15 or something when my mom actually talked to me about sex. In my opinion that wasn't quite soon enough.

[Harnecker]

my daughter is 6, and we have always talked about sex, but in an appropriate way for her age. When she was 3 she knew what was happenning in a pregnant woman's body. When she was 5 she knew how an ovule transforms into a baby. Now she knows that "sex" is what women and men do to have a baby, and that it's a sign of their love. There's not a specific moment to talk about sex, in the same way there's not a specific moment to talk about death. You only have to match your speech to her age

[TheAKAmom]

I learned sadly enough through movies. I plan to talk to my daughyer one on one about it and allow her to ask questions and to be open and honest. If i cant give her an answer shell find someone who can, and thats not what we want. So its best to allow her to lead the subject i believe.

[clnishida]

I found out through my school. My father was a little late with the information. He was a single father and thought that when I was 17 years old was a good time to broach the subject. For my future kids, I plan on slowly introducing the topic of sex peice by peice. I want them to feel comfortable coming to me with their questions.

[oOKrazyKoolOo]

I believe its a good idea to tell your kids about sex at an early age because they need to be aware. Its a natural and wonderful process so why is it so awkward and uncomfortable to tell kids? I was actually never told an i had to find out through "the video" Yikes! that video went into so much detail i wanted to run away screaming! When i have kids i will most definatley tell them at an early age so they won't be as shocked as i was!

[naomrs1]

My heart breaks for Jennifer Coias. She is such a strong, amazing person!

If it isn't bd enough talking to your parents about sex, I had to get "the talk" from my dad when I was 15. With my son I just plan to answer any questions he has honestly in an age appropriate manner. If he doesn't come to me with questions I will definitely give him my two cents about sex! I agree that it's something beautiful and we have to teach our children how to embrace it safely!

[alana09199]

The discussion of sex was never presented to me from my parents. What I learned of it was a distorted view of something that, quite frankly, scared the heck out of me! Later in life in a high school health class I was taught the basics. With my own children we plan to discuss sex with them as soon as we feel they are mature enough to understand. My oldest is 8 and we just had our 2nd child, a boy. There were questions during that time and we answered the questions with an age appropriate answer!

[eden2034]

My mum decided to let take the 'let school deal with it approach' to sex but personally I think the sooner it's introduced the less taboo and embarrassing it is. I'm talking scientifically, I don't think we should destroy children's innocence, I just think the whole stalk or cabbage patch thing gives them the impression that that it's something not to be talked about.

[hartrose33]

watching tv like most, i think

[hazeldream1984]

I don't remember my parents EVER talking about sex with me. I remember the period talk - well I was given a book - but I will never use the stork, I won't be afraid to use the proper words (sex, penis, vagina, uterus...) because if they are exposed to the proper words and ideas I just feel its better and less confusing.

[teanink]

I remember my mom going over sex very generally when I was about 8. I remember already being curious about sex before that, so I think it was a good age. As far as specifics go, though, I learned from the dictionary and school. I do wish my mom had been the one to teach me that. As a parent, I want to teach my kids everything they need to know. I believe parents need to step it up and be the main teachers for their children.

My heart goes out to Jennifer. Amazing legacy she's leaving.

[WeeLittleOnes]

I actually am learning about sex right now in school. I'm in 8th grade. I learned a bit online, though. My mom never talked to me about sex.

I sometimes asked (even though I already knew) " Where do babies come from?"

She said" You know where". Well how was I supposed to know if she never told me?

[frowniebrown86]

I generally think that if they are old enough to ask, they are old enough to know. Ugh my heart was and still is broken for Jennifer Coias...she such an amazing person. I would love to have a donation in my name, I hope I win!!

Re extended breastfeeding, I hear ya.I get comments is about how Jack brat and is spoiled because I still nurse him. People need to mind their own business!!

[MamaNaturalBlog]

@frowniebrown86 I know! Jennifer is amazing... so much good is coming out of it even though it is so crushing. Her facebook page is so sad, inspirational, moving, triumphant, etc. Re: extended nursing, that's why our video will do a lot of good :)> we are working on our parts but it's tricking getting him to cooperate! LOL! Hope to have soon. XO.

[frowniebrown86]

@MamaNaturalBlog my goodness, my keyboard really hates me...constantly moving the cursor and deleting words. please ignore my typos!

[fattiecane]

I plan to homeschool until high school so I will be teaching her about sex...starting in elementary with anatomy. I will probably buy a cirriculum of some sort. Also plan to be very open with all my kids.

[MamaNaturalBlog]

@fattiecane Nice plan!

[phatNaturals]

@fattiecane I home school too :) my eldest daughter started asking questions while I was pregnant so we started giving her age appropriate answers. Because we home school it is amazing how innocent and how much a child she still is compared to her friends. I am so glad she is learning from me and my husband and not some over sexed kid or movie.

[fattiecane]

I don't remember who first told me. Probably school and my parents just figured I knew...which I did. I personally didn't need a sex talk. DH on the other hand didn't know much about female reproductive system so I told him! Contd...

[Lesaphine]

Neither of my parents ever brought up sex around me. Unfortunately, I got most of what I knew from my environment, like school and TV. My fiance and I decided that we're going to teach our kids little by little as they grow up. We don't feel there is any one right time to start. My daughter is 13 months old and we're going to start with body parts (and not just the eyes, nose, ears, etc. that most people do). When she gets a little older, we'll explain a little more.

[ObbsAndLala]

I can understand that parents are uncomfortable having the 'sex talk' with their kids, but I would rather feel awkward and uncomfortable for a short period of time than deal with guilt for the rest of my life if my children got taken advantage of or were unprepared and got themselves in a bad situation that I could have prevented.

[ObbsAndLala]

I don't think it's about a certain age that your kids are ready to learn everything; I think sex is a natural thing and is something that is just part of life. Children should learn gradually throughout their life and NEVER have sex kept a secret from them.

[alaarbena]

My parents never discussed sex with me I learned it through friends and reading romance novels...they just assumed I would learn along the way which I did..this was ok for me....mamanatural are you still breastfeeding???

[MamaNaturalBlog]

@alaarbena Yes, I am still breastfeeding... usually 3 to 4 times a day but Griff is getting ready to get let go of 2nd nap so that will decrease my nursing to 2-3 times a day.

[fluffywanderings]

My parents gave me cartoon sex books as a young kid (meant to for young kids). I learned early and as a result didn't want any part of it until I was almost 20! LOL! :)

[youngliterati]

consequences both emotional, physical, and spiritual. Our children are going to find out about sex somehow, and probably younger than we did, so it might as well be from their parents, rather than a half-informed peer.

[youngliterati]

You definitely have to start talking about sex early. But more importantly (I think) is not limiting yourself to one special "the talk" and then dropping the subject forever. My husband and I plan to start early (obviously keeping it age-appropriate) and then just make it part of the household conversation. This is what my parents did with my siblings and me. Sex was part of life, but we understood that there was a time for it, and that there were consequences (to be continued)

[tayboox33]

Great video :) My mom talked to me about it when I was around 6 years old. She brought it up because I started noticing sexual gestures on TV (when my parents were watching a movie and my sister & I would walk in, etc) & was just curious. Of course I thought it was gross, but I'm really glad she talked to me about it then. As I got older, the more she explained about it. I never got pregnant as a teen and never slept around (only had 4 partners and I'm 21, all were relationships). Keep it up! :)

[Shannindhall]

I was never given the "sex talk" honestly. Learned through my peers & it wasn't the greatest resource. Now, I've had this talk {several and many of times} with our 13yro. I first had the conversation with him at 10 and pretty much now its a conversation that is very open for discussion.

[MBShrewsbury]

LOUD AND PROUD: CURRENTLY BREASTFEEDING A 25MONTH OLD!! WOOHOO!!!

My mom never talked to me about sex.In return I got pregnant at 13.

With a 11 yr old boy and a 10yr old step son we have already started talking about it. Well my husband has, talking about sex with mom is embarrassing. lol

[MamaNaturalBlog]

@MBShrewsbury Ooooooo!!!! I got the chills again. LOVE IT MAMA! How often do you nurse nowadays? Good for you for doing something different with your kiddos. Yes, I think gender to gender talks are probably the most effective for the nitty gritty details :).

[MBShrewsbury]

@MamaNaturalBlog We stopped night-time middle of the night feedings. We were co-sleeping up until about 4 months ago, and decided to side-car and no more nursing and he started sleeping through the night. YAY!

So we nurse 1x in the morning when he wakes up, and 1x when I pick him up after day care, and then 1-2x before bed as needed and to go to sleep, thats M-F. And on the weekends I just do it when ever he feels like it. :-)

[CooKieChiKy]

I learned in school..fourth grade...I rather have this talk with my children 1st...then they can learn the rest in school...

[Lunar1900]

I totally agree. I believe young children should never hear about stories of stalks. Why not tell them the truth, isn't our way of producing a baby a fairytale in its self?!

[MamaNaturalBlog]

@Lunar1900 Oh, it is! Got the chills.... XO.

[Fiestafreak1978]

I learned from classmates and school library books!

Great giveaway this week btw...

[jackiesesthetics88]

My mother called me into my room and sat me down and explained it when I was about 9. Seem young? Well i had already heard about it when I was in kindergarten by a girl who had lots of older siblings who told her far too young... I think honesty is the best policy. I will talk to my daughter about it when she is 8 or 9 as that is when the issue starts coming up sadly. My mom explained it with love and that it is about love and that gave me a healthy perspective on it :)

[phatNaturals]

I learned what sex was from watching my grandpa watch dirty movies YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I learned what love making was from reading Song of Solomon."The sex talk" for my daughters 3 and 8 has already begun with learning to respect their bodies and how their bodies function. I so love what this weeks give away is....God bless Jennifer Coias!!!!!!!

[OffbeatMama]

My parents were very open and honest about sex. I remember being about 7 and openly being able to ask questions. I never got the "I will tell you when your 18" line. I can recall asking them whatever I wanted and never feeling embarrassed or ashamed, and that's exactly what I want to have with my children. Open and honest communication.

[tnrkustoms]

Hey @mamanatural, where is the info to donate money and bags? :)

[MamaNaturalBlog]

@tnrkustoms Hi hon! Just posted. Sorry about that and THANK YOU for the ping. XOXO.

[tnrkustoms]

So sad! I'm sending breastmilk bags :(

[tnrkustoms]

I honestly don't remember when I learned about sex. With being the youngest, I kinda just found out gradually through my older siblings and friends.

[DreamAFever]

I learned about sex very young, not from my parents though. I was an early reader and I was obsessed with reading my mom's baby information books and most of them involve conceiving. I actually told my older sister, in detail, what sex was. I felt guilty as a kid and struggled with how I was going to deal with my parents trying to have "the talk" with me, and me already knowing. With my daughter, I'm going be as open as possible from the get-go. No stork nonsense. Sex is a natural part of life.

[lolomcgeel]

My parents never told me about sex...or about anything pertaining to my body, really. My mom just threw "Your Body and You" at me and left it at that. I learned most of what I knew about sex at school (awkward, I was the only one that didn't already know), and at church (if you're not married, don't do it). I wish my parents would have talked to me more.

[MamaNaturalBlog]

@lolomcgeel Thanks for your honesty! It helps others. My parents didn't talk to me about sex either. I got a book called "What's Happening to My Body" and was supposed to figure it out. LOL! Truth is, I had an older brother and between him and neighborhood kids, I got the scoop. It would have been much more empowering to learn from my parents though.

[fwrightify]

Growing up my sex talk was very uncomfortable. My mom felt weird and so did I. I think its important to let your child know its nothing to be embarrassed about and its natural. That's what I want to convey to my future children.

[happyhomebodies]

I agree with starting talk about love and being honest about where babies come from an early age. By leaving this discussion open it can grow with your child. As your child wants to know more or as you feel comfortable you can open the floor up to different parts of love and sex. If your child knows they can come to you it will make for a much better situation for everyone.

[MamaNaturalBlog]

@happyhomebodies I love the idea of an evolving conversation. I actually can't wait! This is the stuff of life ;).

[happyhomebodies]

@MamaNaturalBlog I do look forward to it as well! =-) I, like many, don't have very found memories of these discussions with my mom or even very many at that. I hope that I can have a different impression on my children and what they in turn think about sex and love.