Agree to Be Offended: Curious Connections in Conversations of Race

[kyraocity]

@psyjunta Hey I really appreciate you watching the video. I think you took the point of of context. I made a quick association but the point is that this kinds of symbolic knee jerk reactions are what make ppl so crazy daily and we could learn to agree to be offended and go the next step and discover what's beyond, what's deeper. So I believe we are on the same page my dear.

[chesterbogus]

You are very accurately describing the process I went through myself, going from a white guy in the Midwest to a racial minority in Asia.

And, you know, I've been the idiot, bumbling white guy saying dumb, vaguely racist things - and I've fielded dumb, vaguely racist questions from my friends.

I think "agree to be offended" is how we dealt with each other, and I learned a lot from it. Unfortunately, now I don't know how to talk to normal, easily-offended white people...

[lumbia33]

i will add that in conversations about MLK people usually leave out his meeting with elijah muhammad in 1966; king began to espouse a stronger black nationalist philosophy- he was all about black financial/wealth independence in the end.

and interracial relationships do not mean that less racism happens. i can tell you a few stories... this does not solve all our problems, as some folks would like us to think. the key is knowledge of self, then you can go anywhere in life without fear!

[kyraocity]

Thanks for sharing your experience. I just started teaching at Baruch 3 years ago. I don't think ppl mean to be insensitive but we really haven't learned to listen past the cliche reactions regarding blackness, race, or racism. It's so automatic how we respond and react usually. And the exceptions are underreported.

[lumbia33]

despite having experienced racism in the NYC, it was not until i moved to the northwest where i started hearing the term 'white guilt', and people saying they were ashamed to be white. and people petting me and grabbing my hair asking how i washed it. and telling me i was too sensitive and that i was reading too much into things. and 'why is it always because you're black?' and why do you wear black all the time? i got confused (because that never happened to me before), then i became upset.

[lumbia33]

when i was in the NYC i hung out with all sorts of people of all sorts of cultures, and we all were proud to be who we were, in terms of culture. that's what i love about new york. i did have some self-hating parents, and i could not understand it (now i do). but my best friend in high school was yugoslavian, i hung out with panamanians, chinese people, jamaican people... and we were all proud of what our people contributed, in terms of food, language, etc.

[lumbia33]

yeah... dance of the infidel is a good album. seeing her do it live is even better...

and i went to baruch for about a year and transferred to hunter in the mid 1990s. were you at baruch then? i don't remember any classes like this there. the great irony is that when i was in new york people would say racist things to me in my face, and i was even told i couldn't move into an apartment because i was black...

[lookingtool]

kyraocity, I am just watching your video Agree to Be Offended: Curious Connections in Conversations of Race

now, :-)

[kyraocity]

Most of the luxuries and many of the so-called comforts of life, are not only not indispensable, but positive hindrances to the elevation of mankind Henry David Thoreau

[xdadepsak]

What's this nonsense about a black ring in pretty pretty princess?

It's contrived to call that racism. Foolish, even. Did I miss the sarcasm?

[kyraocity]

Sure is. But since race is a social construct, many of us, including myself get offended by things we ASSOCIATE with race. It's not what's real that is racism for some, it's what you believe. This project ain't about the courts or jobs, it's about relationships and people. What's funny in hindsight is that the kids were like WHY ARE YOU HOLDING UP THE GAME GROWNUP! LOL My point is the everyday person can make a difference.

[kyraocity]

It begins with such minor offenses to our sensibilities as the symbolism we associate with black skin. It's not inherently bad. We make it mean that but then we forget we made it up. That example was personal. But racism at the societal level affects the personal to the degree that we DON'T DEAL with what truly offends us no matter who insignificant it may seem to others. It matters.

[xdadepsak]

I suppose I simply have the luxury of actually being able to see past semantics and other benign social constructs.

[MoRobi0515]

Keep em Honest or rather Us Honest!! Peace!!

[Wasani08]

Kyra, this is amazing stuff. I am completely fascinated with your presentation and your promise for the world. Touch, moved and inspired!

[kyraocity]

Thanks. TMI!

[darththc]

i like the idea of not shutting down. i find today most people being racist i encounter are minorities, because from their point of veiw their actions and thoughts are activism not racism. the racism itself doesn't bother me at all, but the idea that it's not racism really rubs me the wrong way, for reasons i can't really define. when i call them on it, i'm branded as a racist, but sticks and stones, if you're still letting words hurt you, go back to grade school.

[kyraocity]

darththc:: words have power. Words like "I do" and "you're guilty" in the right context mean...everything! I am not clear on your words about "the idea that it's not racist". What is the "it's" you mean here?

[darththc]

by "it's" i mean the racism directed at me hiding as activism. if people want to be little minded and biggotous that's their business, but when they don't see there own racism and convince themselves it's activism, it just gets under my skin. those who can see past color gender, and sexual preference are going to move foward, those who can't will be left behind in an ever maturing world. thanks for the reply.

[kyraocity]

what if you could agree to be offended by their bigotous "activism" and stay in conversation with them anyhow? What would it make available for you? for them? as a strategy for transforming or overcoming the experience that being racist is wrong or needs fixing?

[tactarv]

This is a very insightful piece of work. Thank you for sending it.

David Tarver

[xircle]

You have a typo that I noticed 2:48 into the movie, the Japanese slide. The bottom paragraph "That allows us explore" should be "That allows us to explore".

[kyraocity]

It's Javanese (Java) not Japanese (Japan).

[kyraocity]

And thanks for the heads up!

[ricomachiavelli]

Thank you for leaving this video as a response.