can you explain me please what's the plot, what happens? in a simple english please, because i'm not english. for example what is rebecca doing? and why is andrew choking the othe woman? etc etc. thanks
The actresses should've switched roles. The woman playing the girlfriend would be a more convincing prostitute. If she was the girlfriend, I'm not convinced she would be insecure in her relationship with anyone. Not all film directors limit themselves to any film school taught "180 rule" or "right" or "correct" editing and camera work.
Otherwise great work...keep improving - i know im still striving for improvements in my own work. If you would like to watch some of mine and leave comments go ahead on my you tube or go to myspace dot com fwd slash productioneruption
- I would also watch some of the framing eg: if the character is looking right and they are the only "person in shot" then they should be on the left and generally u would leave eye room/nose room so it "creates" the illusion he/she is looking in that direction without 'deadspace' in the background.
-Be weary of the music you choose behind a scene, sometimes music with lyrics can take away from what is being said by the characters!
hey thanks for watching. yes i did break that 180 rule, i will watch that next time. The different framing however was on purpose. I like to break rules sometimes to make it different. The music i thought suited it well, but i think i did make it too loud. Thanks for your advise though!
Hey - Im friends with Jules and he told me to watch the film. I read your comment saying that your still learning - like myself, I am studdying film in my last year at university.
A few pointers to watch for:
- Watch the 180 degree rule, i could see a cross of the line atleast once in the last scene with jules and the gf. Unless it was intentional
there was also confusion when the girl told the boy "you have been here everynight this week" and then he apologises for being a bad boyfriend? not trying to ripp you apart just small critic's that aid in story telling.
thankyou for the feedback. i agree with what you have said. I am still learning a lot about filmmaking. This is only my second dramatic short film. Just one little note on the 'bad boyfriend' thing: even though he was there with her, he had still been distant. I know it could have been explained better. Thanks again!
in all honesty the acting was not there, the girl was far from suductive the boy was without a clear journey..but i can see where you are trying to go with it and im sure with better actors and dialogue you could go further.
can you explain me please what's the plot, what happens? in a simple english please, because i'm not english. for example what is rebecca doing? and why is andrew choking the othe woman? etc etc. thanks
fenderbass8 3 years ago
The actresses should've switched roles. The woman playing the girlfriend would be a more convincing prostitute. If she was the girlfriend, I'm not convinced she would be insecure in her relationship with anyone. Not all film directors limit themselves to any film school taught "180 rule" or "right" or "correct" editing and camera work.
pallas1957 4 years ago
cont..
Otherwise great work...keep improving - i know im still striving for improvements in my own work. If you would like to watch some of mine and leave comments go ahead on my you tube or go to myspace dot com fwd slash productioneruption
:) Thanks
Jus
justininoz 4 years ago
cont..
- I would also watch some of the framing eg: if the character is looking right and they are the only "person in shot" then they should be on the left and generally u would leave eye room/nose room so it "creates" the illusion he/she is looking in that direction without 'deadspace' in the background.
-Be weary of the music you choose behind a scene, sometimes music with lyrics can take away from what is being said by the characters!
justininoz 4 years ago
hey thanks for watching. yes i did break that 180 rule, i will watch that next time. The different framing however was on purpose. I like to break rules sometimes to make it different. The music i thought suited it well, but i think i did make it too loud. Thanks for your advise though!
fallenrosemedia 4 years ago
Hey - Im friends with Jules and he told me to watch the film. I read your comment saying that your still learning - like myself, I am studdying film in my last year at university.
A few pointers to watch for:
- Watch the 180 degree rule, i could see a cross of the line atleast once in the last scene with jules and the gf. Unless it was intentional
justininoz 4 years ago
there was also confusion when the girl told the boy "you have been here everynight this week" and then he apologises for being a bad boyfriend? not trying to ripp you apart just small critic's that aid in story telling.
scottdarwon 4 years ago
thankyou for the feedback. i agree with what you have said. I am still learning a lot about filmmaking. This is only my second dramatic short film. Just one little note on the 'bad boyfriend' thing: even though he was there with her, he had still been distant. I know it could have been explained better. Thanks again!
fallenrosemedia 4 years ago
in all honesty the acting was not there, the girl was far from suductive the boy was without a clear journey..but i can see where you are trying to go with it and im sure with better actors and dialogue you could go further.
scottdarwon 4 years ago