On a side note, these websites that demonize masturbation are fucking hilarious. It's been proven to have psychological and physical benefits for both men and women. And I usually feel relieved and relaxed after I masturbate, not "enslaved", haha. Sweet Jesus, these people are silly.
In some ways it's similar to the tactics of The Party in 1984, ensure that everyone has a bunch of suppressed energy, and harness that energy so that it all comes out in work to help the party and vehement hatred aimed at enemies of the party. I'm glad I'm an atheist, I can enjoy myself without feeling that I am going against the will of some invisible deity that may reprimand me for my "sins" once I pass on.
You know, I've noticed something, most religions forbid their members to do almost anything that feels really good. No masturbation, no marijuana, no premarital sex, no oral sex what so ever, making friends outside of the religion is usually discouraged etc. Maybe it's because they don't want people to realize that they can feel happy and pleasured without god.
ha, he probably can't get it to go hard which would explain his instant hate towards wanking, he probably thinks of fucking the little girls that are part of his puritan cult whilst he wanks.
Jesus titty fucking Christ. What the fuck? I don't get religion.. they're willing to be slaves to NOTHING. Well, perhaps the idea that this is some test. Why? Have they ever explained why God is testing us? What is the freaking purpose? These religious nutjobs are driving me insane.. I'd kill myself if I had to stop myself from masturbating or supress the thought of lusting. God damn, how do you create a psychopath? *sigh* It's unnatural not/never to masturbate or to lust. It relieves tension.
You have to admire the balls of an obviously overweight guy , talking about ' lusts of the flesh ' . As if stuffing your face with twinkies is not a ' lust of the flesh ' .
Replacing self gratification with stuffing his face with twinkies. That's what you get.. replace one stress reliever with another.. Oh the self indulgence, not to mention, irony, contradiction and delusion..
I don't understand why they don't follow ALL the rules in the OT if they are going to follow some. Interesting how they observe the sex ones and ignore all the food ones. Well maybe not so surprising in his case given the size of him
What cake? All of the cake I've ever been promised on gootube was a LIE! No, seriously, this was a great vid breaking down the thoughts of a SERIOUSLY psychologically twisted young man.
apparently "Jesus" was an extremely popular name back when the christ was around, so uh, there was totally a jesus back then. and all his other jesus friends. :D
It's funny how the only reason he thinks it's wrong is because the bible says so. There is absolutely zero rationality with fundamentalists. Thinking is as sinful to them as masturbation, both of which should come as naturally as breathing.
I wonder if he consulted with his in-house pastor on how to "approach" this subject? Imagine the convo between him and pastor jerry. "Dad, recently I've noticed when I masturbate, I'm getting a little rough with myself. Is that normal?"
At least he doesn't have to worry about anyone fantasizing about him!
On a side note, these websites that demonize masturbation are fucking hilarious. It's been proven to have psychological and physical benefits for both men and women. And I usually feel relieved and relaxed after I masturbate, not "enslaved", haha. Sweet Jesus, these people are silly.
handmiadenofgod 1 year ago
In some ways it's similar to the tactics of The Party in 1984, ensure that everyone has a bunch of suppressed energy, and harness that energy so that it all comes out in work to help the party and vehement hatred aimed at enemies of the party. I'm glad I'm an atheist, I can enjoy myself without feeling that I am going against the will of some invisible deity that may reprimand me for my "sins" once I pass on.
handmiadenofgod 1 year ago
You know, I've noticed something, most religions forbid their members to do almost anything that feels really good. No masturbation, no marijuana, no premarital sex, no oral sex what so ever, making friends outside of the religion is usually discouraged etc. Maybe it's because they don't want people to realize that they can feel happy and pleasured without god.
handmiadenofgod 1 year ago
why are natural instincts always acts against god? if god exists, it created all of our urges and processes, so why would it be evil?
MobileThinker 1 year ago
ha, he probably can't get it to go hard which would explain his instant hate towards wanking, he probably thinks of fucking the little girls that are part of his puritan cult whilst he wanks.
LezanDez 1 year ago
So how much you wanna bet daddy caught him jerking it and made him enroll n that online thing?
CBUEngineer 2 years ago 8
girl on girl with 16inch strap-ones
HellsCowBoy666 2 years ago
I jerk off at least 3 times a day FUCK YOU JORDAN
HellsCowBoy666 2 years ago 4
Jesus titty fucking Christ. What the fuck? I don't get religion.. they're willing to be slaves to NOTHING. Well, perhaps the idea that this is some test. Why? Have they ever explained why God is testing us? What is the freaking purpose? These religious nutjobs are driving me insane.. I'd kill myself if I had to stop myself from masturbating or supress the thought of lusting. God damn, how do you create a psychopath? *sigh* It's unnatural not/never to masturbate or to lust. It relieves tension.
Drynae 2 years ago 4
You have to admire the balls of an obviously overweight guy , talking about ' lusts of the flesh ' . As if stuffing your face with twinkies is not a ' lust of the flesh ' .
ComradeAgopian 2 years ago
Replacing self gratification with stuffing his face with twinkies. That's what you get.. replace one stress reliever with another.. Oh the self indulgence, not to mention, irony, contradiction and delusion..
Drynae 2 years ago
how do they consider this freedom? denying yourself any physical pleasure... oh joy!!! He and his father are both psychotic...
tattooskin72 2 years ago
You know why Jesus never sinned? Because he DIDN'T EXIST! Fuck you Constantine for bringing this plague of christianity onto mankind!
quinn2469 2 years ago 2
Fap fap, fappity-fap fap!
BohemianBlasphemy 2 years ago
I don't understand why they don't follow ALL the rules in the OT if they are going to follow some. Interesting how they observe the sex ones and ignore all the food ones. Well maybe not so surprising in his case given the size of him
AuntieDiluvian 2 years ago 2
What cake? All of the cake I've ever been promised on gootube was a LIE! No, seriously, this was a great vid breaking down the thoughts of a SERIOUSLY psychologically twisted young man.
bamboo4tameshigiri 2 years ago
I wonder if he cries when he masturbates, crying because he has committed a sexual sin the filthy heathen.
CrosshairJack 2 years ago 2
Jordan Has Trouble With Masturbation because He Has No Dick.....!
spaceman300 2 years ago 2
probably uses his pinkies because his penis is to small.
salikali2 2 years ago 4
apparently "Jesus" was an extremely popular name back when the christ was around, so uh, there was totally a jesus back then. and all his other jesus friends. :D
ElectroWaffles 2 years ago
It's funny how the only reason he thinks it's wrong is because the bible says so. There is absolutely zero rationality with fundamentalists. Thinking is as sinful to them as masturbation, both of which should come as naturally as breathing.
PluralOfEverything 2 years ago 2
Tbh, this kid better get used to pulling the head off it.
kff 2 years ago
I wonder if his dad caught him at it one day and punished him...
rnistuk 2 years ago
he would cut his 1 incher off
salikali2 2 years ago 3
For wanking??
That's a bit harsh.
rnistuk 2 years ago
for atheist's its harsh for christians its the way to go. XD
salikali2 2 years ago
I wonder if he consulted with his in-house pastor on how to "approach" this subject? Imagine the convo between him and pastor jerry. "Dad, recently I've noticed when I masturbate, I'm getting a little rough with myself. Is that normal?"
At least he doesn't have to worry about anyone fantasizing about him!
fiusux12 2 years ago
He claims he whacks off but I bet he couldn't find his dick since he was a kid and discovered the joy of pie's and cakes.
th3d3wd3r 2 years ago 2
Haha :P There is no wonder why christian are dum! If they dont jerk of, the sperm is old and weak, so its fucked from the beginning :P lol!
ligsom 2 years ago
porn is evil???? You cant mean lesbian porn too!!!????
threedfiend 2 years ago
not the lesbians...anything but the lesbians
1Optek3 2 years ago
Top gear has had an effect on you junosden. Jerking off no more but wanking.
LostSimply 2 years ago
remember every time you have a wank baby Jesus cries
sean270674 2 years ago 3
Jordan probably has gay thoughts about Jesus everytime! There is nothing wrong with spanking the monkey!!It's natural!!
Jimb0can 2 years ago
Do you think Jordan dislikes wanking because his pudgy arms simply can't reach over his stomach? It must be terrible, I mean its a disability really!
ScouseCaspaXS 2 years ago 9
It could be. He does always seem out of breath when he is just sitting there.
eimajuno 2 years ago 4
Yeah he's trying to reach it,
"This time I'll do it!"
*HURGGHHHHH*
*pant* *pant* *pant*
"SHIT!"
ScouseCaspaXS 2 years ago 5
its not so much that but can he see it over or under his stomach? i bet he has to put a mirror on the floor to gauge where it is :D
threedfiend 2 years ago
LMAO, maybe he's the transitional living fossil of human from t-rex?
fiusux12 2 years ago