John Mayer Stand Up

[cullycucc]

disgusting douchebag

[MusicMeUpBaby]

he is really charismatic and has some funny ideas, but the audience is going a little too insane... starstruck maybe?

[rmed30]

This guy is a disaster. He makes Tracy Morgan look like fuckin Carlin by comparison

[stephenG559]

Okay this stuff is funny,but damn did they laugh way too hard...

[UrbanTheoryMusic]

dude this is funny,he's not afraid to make fun of himself a little,its hilarious.

[Dangturtle]

DUDE!! EVERYONE has found porn in the woods.

Mayer is fantastic. I don't like his music, but I like him as a person and he's good at stand up.

[therealjasonbjorn]

@Dangturtle the historical way of finding porn... a young boy lifting an old log in the woods and there it is wrinkled and muddy barely being able to make it out and you stare in shock yet amazed....odd. lolololol

[jyo17]

i can watch him whole day

[goodnamestaken]

not a john mayer fan, but this is actually pretty good.

[joerdanvo]

He is actually kinda funny

[11stevehoward]

Sorry, like John Mayer but stick to music man

[xxguitarhero48xx]

"Well, now we know what he does in the morning.."

[kingofdash]

Hate on him all you want, but this was kinda funny. Try to write a comedy bit only five minutes long. Hell, try to write a cohesive comedy bit that flows. Can't do it? Then shut the fuck up. Being a comic is one of the hardest jobs in showbiz.

[patrickroege]

hot hot hot

[kevin2fla]

Ahhhhhhhhhh this shit was funny as hell.

[guitarplayer407]

people love john mayer because his music is great and everybody can relate to him..

[theugene]

wow thoes ppl lovvvve jm. welll it is a john meyer cruise how cool is thhat. hes pretty funny too. idk about making jokes about kids and porn tho wtf

[MrSilverDany]

obviously when he john was a teen, he was a horny geeky guy.

[MJimiD]

Can't stand him or his music, but this is fucking funny!

[The123randomtv]

He is a fucking dirtbag.

[kisslaughlove21]

what a jerk. he's a disgrace.

[frostbitestudios]

25 people know John Mayer is a tool. 119 people know John Mayer is a tool but thought this was funny anyway.

[StockholmSyndrome08]

we share the same comedic downfall, i did stand-up comedy at an open mic and it went down quite well, but when I watched it back, I pretty much ranted about porn, masturbation and other sexual related things.

Also, my first porn was actually a few torn up pages from a magazine, dumped on the ground in the woods and it was all waterlogged and faded.

[BlackMambaPANIC]

the women squealing with laughter after everything he says = so fucking annoying

[CaramelMarshmallow]

I think the first blowjob joke was good. the rest was just stupid talking.

[OpionatedPenguin]

Fuck, he's annoying. I swear to God, if a celebrity trying to do standup starts shooting the audiance, it's considered funny. I don't hear any guys laughing either.

[hersheykissie12]

omg what does he say at 1:33 i cannot figure it out

[Cruzito3000]

I... I'm sorry I didn't see much funny in this. The only thing that got a smirk was the rainman reference. and lets be honest pretty much any rainman anytime is funny.

[4TheMus1c]

@Cruzito3000 haha ur comment was funny as fuck!

haha thank you so much for that :)

[popsymusic]

hes as funny as dane cook, larry the cable guy, and jeff dunham put together! i hear he's playing before the monster truck show next week

[47masterguitar]

haha! Who knew John could be so funny?

The one about Perez Hilton is hilarious!

[zwiz5290]

@ b1llybrown, apparently the crowd liked hearing him talk too.... Dumbass...

[rexdefine]

Ha, it's not that "only the ladies are laughing" it's that the person holding a camera is a GIRL with her GIRLFRIENDS so that's all you're hearing. In addition, this is actually pretty comical by comparison to other "comedians" who've become so annoyingly popular that even a mousefart would be funny (AKA Dane Cook) so give the guy a break, it's like his first or second time even doing it... And if he's so "annoying as fuck" then why did you search for "John Mayer Stand up" in the first place?

[countingmoons]

apple 'W'.... i just learned that. LOL

[3Dtwin1]

"You can't resist me when I sing and play right up in your face

Please let me put my SUV in to your parking space"

-Key of Awesome!!!

[zzackcc]

yeah i mean you cant expect John Mayer to be George Carlin especially in what his second stand up attempt? he's an incredible musician. this is actually somewhat funny. he's incredibly wrapped up in himself and i find that funny about it.

[xSoulSacrifice]

Lol. If you're popular like this guy, even a yawn will be considered funny. xD

[DropShopCop]

why would ppl take this serious like this is is real life? they are idiots to not take this as regular comedy.

[nickdude09]

Yes, it is all the chicks who are laughing. My god, such a terrible thing. You know, I would absolutely HATE to go up on stage,do my routine and have all of the girls eat it up. Yes. That.would.be.terrible.

[FormerBokabeed]

Well, at least he's trying to be well rounded...

[thebiz76]

dude hes annoying as fuck

[MsStardolluser]

do u notce that only the ladies r laughing?

[eatcheesenow]

if he wasn't in front of an audience composed entirely of slags who've come because they already want to see him naked and like hearing him talk about his penis then he'd get booed off the stage lols

[fannyslapper33]

This was fucking horrible.....all you faggots that say this is funny have no sense of humor at all.

[davidpaularagon]

Not bad, considering he's a musician. "Who is this guy they're writing about cuz he seems fucking cool. Apparently the only person getting more ass than me is me!" BTW he HAS 2 talk abt getting laid because he's fucking John Mayer. Everybody knows that he's a hearthrob and there are crowds of women who've never even met him and want to fuck him. One of the first rules of comedy is to address the obvious. He had some funny stuff some dumb stuff, bt hey if he likes 2 tell jokes let him tell jokes

[MinM66]

he reminds me of Chris Brown "OH MY GOD HES SO AWESOME" cant wait til he smacks a hoe then they all turn on him and act like they never liked him i dont hate him or anything i actually like some of his songs like free fallin which im told its not his original but whatever...

[Gerron222]

It's ok, I enjoyed it.

[Psykoged]

Thumbs up if american stand-up is boring

[blooberflat22]

@Psykoged

shouldnt judge any stand-up based on this douche....hes a professional douche and horrible comedian....people are just laughing because of his name

[EddieVedder13]

This is reality that just happens to be funny lol the more I listen to John Mayer the more I can see we are very much alike aside from the talent

[freaper94]

It's all chicks at this goddam thing that are laughing

[CavenEdwards]

I was a bit skeptical, but I have to say I'm impressed.

[prankpranktimephone]

he's obsessed with him self!

[TheR91]

double jeopardy bitch! lolll

[AnonymousWhitePerson]

Hilarious.

[XploitCOTW]

Most comedians talk about their life, things that have happened.. This guy is doing the same thing. If you dont enjoy his music or comedy, than why did you waste 5 minutes of your life watching it?

[icelivcream123]

he is not very good

[dreadguy14]

Who the fuck is laughing?

[hockeyMVP4life]

he might have a staggeringly large ego - but a few of his jokes are kind of funny.

"what's happening tonight? fucking nothing" lolll

[Sh4tter3d]

AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAAAAA­AAHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHHA HAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAHAH­AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH i fucking love this self centered cock sucking little queer, he's not funny and all his jokes about about him jerking off, whata fucking homo ahahaha funniest thing i've ever watched. And I love that crowd, they're laughing their ass off cause they get to see john mayer attempt comedy

[bubbly221]

its ok, i guess. really liked the Will you play me butterflies, though. the rest... sucked...

[goatsmilk234]

what an asshole

[poopcorny]

this is horrible

[theonemuffin]

terrible

[sirussm]

Holy fuck that's so true porn in the woods, me too.

[ImaginairyMuffinMix]

ugh.

[43racer43]

Why are they laughing?? this sux

[SK371]

I looked this video up just do diss him. but I gotta admit, he was actually pretty good

[theonemuffin]

@SK371 nope

[marcryptic]

wow he's relating everything to his real life. and masturbation jokes never get old.

[romeosevendelta]

for the ladies in the comments below, go for it. i hope you enjoy being his next punch line....

[LeaveItToBeaner]

he's about as funny as a root canal......

[b1llybrown]

this guy must really like to hear himself....

[TheLeoAndujar]

@b1llybrown like to hear himslef talk? its stand up comedy jackass.

whats he gonna do stand up there and just look at people?? stop hating dude.. =__=

[Joshpy27]

@TheLeoAndujar I loled :D

[blooberflat22]

@TheLeoAndujar

he meant that he sucks ass and has no business doing comedy because these people are obviously just laughing because hes famous....not funny....duhhh

[MrDoodle1992]

@TheLeoAndujar Uh, maybe he'd play music and do what he's good at? Just sayin'... and even his music is horn-doggish. Seriously, dude, this guy is just sad. He's talented as a musician, but he's a miserable man... He talks about all the sex he's had and the j'ing off he does every morning? Really? Sad man.

[TheLeoAndujar]

@MrDoodle1992 umm its stand up comedy.. i dont know where you've been but theres alot of comedians who talk about sex and "j'ing off" its not new.. the majority of them talk about things that are alot worst.. and as for "playing music and do what he's good at" thats an opinion. i happen to think the guy is pretty funny..

[MrDoodle1992]

@TheLeoAndujar True. That doesn't make them any better or worse than Mayer. He's a pretty sad human being under all the fame. And it really isn't that funny... no, it's just not funny. I didn't laugh once.

[TheLeoAndujar]

@MrDoodle1992 i agree this in particular isnt funny.. but to say mayer isnt a funny guy is taking it a little too far.. he does like little jokes and bits in between songs and theyre pretty funny.. his VH1 storytellers wasnt bad either.. he's an awsome musician but not the best comedian. but still kind of funny.. you cant be awsome at everything... watch his interviews and when he appears on talk shows and shit.. he;s not an unfunny guy.. just not a comedian.. fuck it hes trying.. lol

[turoniner]

@TheLeoAndujar HA last time i checked he wasn't a stand up comic but was a guitar player...

[TheLeoAndujar]

@turoniner never said he was a stand up comedian, i said HES DOING STAND UP COMEDY.. whats he doing up there, jacking off..? -.- and if you want to get technical he's not a guitarist, he's a singer/songwriter (x

[b1llybrown]

this guy must really like to hear himself....

[hersheykissie12]

What does he say at 1:33?

[itsonlynatural]

Double jeopardy, bitch! Hahaha, this is great.

[steveballzonya1]

" You know what?? I shoulda called it" LMAO HAHAHA

[mayer8356]

"There's no optimism like that first jerk in the morning"

Haha

[NecronAbyss]

It's so so, better than I heard it was going to be.

[snackymcgoo]

OMG water logged mag is how I found out.

[726ryblz66]

I like it man!  Keeping it real and talking the truth. Shit....you ain't married. Talk that shit up.

[StcNick]

for first time stand up that was pretty damn good. Everybody dissing mayer should stop cuz you obviously didnt watch the clip. Dont get me wrong his music is for pussies but for first time stand up, not bad

[jaymoore299]

He tongue kissed Perez Hilton, what a fruit.

[rojax6]

Watching John Mayer do stand-up... and a word springs to mind... it starts with a D and ends with bag.

I mean this is someone who has absolutely no self-awareness.

[jordanmusicmurray]

Legend!

[ARocketToTheStars]

i clicked apple + w , uhm ,... he got me

[JennaLeighhh]

this is actually pretty funny.

[toastnuances]

@JennaLeighhh hi jenna :)

[JennaLeighhh]

@toastnuances hahahaaa i am rofling as we speak because this is our common interest video...

[bangs9]

This is soooo lame. He seems like such an ass.

[hkd123]

its funny cos its true. every last detail. hahaha

[jmjunkie]

Freaking hilarious!!!  Thanks for sharing it with those of us who couldn't be on MCC2... we live vicariously through you!

[CaptalnCharisma]

"whereever they may be right now" sigh, this guy is too g

[santiagochamp]

when the hell was this?!?! i was on the boat and never saw this!

[geezloueeze]

That's hysterical! Luv you JM...you boy next door sex-aholic you. Just kidding...or maybe not!