god my mom fucked me up lol. this video is about me. my mom would purposely made fun of me and got ppl to join in in public, now im ALWAYS DEFENSIVE. this is soooo ugh........I need change.
Not being defensive can be very difficult, especially when someone makes a "jab" at you, or disparges something you value. I am going to try counting and saying "ohm" in my head, hahaha. It is also a big problem that people expect you not to be defensive when clearly they are attempting to hurt your feelings, and then you are the "bad guy" for jabbing back. I dont know how you would classify this behavior, those who bait people, but it can be far more disruptive than defensiveness.
My girlfriend is one of the sweetest girls I ever met. Very caring, thoughtful and very funny. However, she SNAPS! and gets very defensive at little things. I try to tell her about it. She says she understands and knows her problem
i am very defensive but i became very calm about it altho it kills me inside n i dwell on it all day later. n i hate when a situation replays in my mind over and over again that is by far the most annoying thing how do i learn to just let things go i dont know why i hold onto negative things n not respond on the postive things.
Thanks for your helpful videos. Everyone carries parts of all the traits you talk about in these videos, including being defensive. The question is how defensive? What is appropriate? (sometimes people "put you on the defensive") It's a continuum. Too little may show no boundary. Too much is certainly easy to spot. I am never defensive when I am alone! peace
My gf says that i am super defensive and that when i am, it triggers behavior in her she never thought she was capable of doing. if she says something that i feel is false, why am i labeled defensive and denied any room for discussion on the topic? If she says i am always absent minded... which i am not, then why am i defensive by saying "i am not always absent minded"?
~Laughs ... I was like uhmmm, no I'm not defensive. Yikes - thanks so very much for the straight up "HOW" to correct this pattern. You are wonderful, keep posting please!
i find myself correcting my boyfriend all the time. he will speak but not correctly and i find myself correcting his grammar, vocab , syntax, everything and in front of people. But i cannot stop the autopilot. i just blurt it out and then i regret it. and i find myself being always defensive. always. why am i so defensive?? i think that i have narcissistic parents ,so maybe i have grown up like that. but i dont want to be like that anymore.
god my mom fucked me up lol. this video is about me. my mom would purposely made fun of me and got ppl to join in in public, now im ALWAYS DEFENSIVE. this is soooo ugh........I need change.
burrochapadogrl 5 months ago
Not being defensive can be very difficult, especially when someone makes a "jab" at you, or disparges something you value. I am going to try counting and saying "ohm" in my head, hahaha. It is also a big problem that people expect you not to be defensive when clearly they are attempting to hurt your feelings, and then you are the "bad guy" for jabbing back. I dont know how you would classify this behavior, those who bait people, but it can be far more disruptive than defensiveness.
johnlovesbridge 1 year ago
My girlfriend is one of the sweetest girls I ever met. Very caring, thoughtful and very funny. However, she SNAPS! and gets very defensive at little things. I try to tell her about it. She says she understands and knows her problem
JBthree24 2 years ago
i am very defensive but i became very calm about it altho it kills me inside n i dwell on it all day later. n i hate when a situation replays in my mind over and over again that is by far the most annoying thing how do i learn to just let things go i dont know why i hold onto negative things n not respond on the postive things.
BRONXPEPE 2 years ago
Thanks for your helpful videos. Everyone carries parts of all the traits you talk about in these videos, including being defensive. The question is how defensive? What is appropriate? (sometimes people "put you on the defensive") It's a continuum. Too little may show no boundary. Too much is certainly easy to spot. I am never defensive when I am alone! peace
sylvestermeow 2 years ago
Yep, love your hair and your jewelry...and, of course all of your advice. Been very helpful. Thanks!
skeletonmom 2 years ago
My gf says that i am super defensive and that when i am, it triggers behavior in her she never thought she was capable of doing. if she says something that i feel is false, why am i labeled defensive and denied any room for discussion on the topic? If she says i am always absent minded... which i am not, then why am i defensive by saying "i am not always absent minded"?
aerosmithguy151 2 years ago
~Laughs ... I was like uhmmm, no I'm not defensive. Yikes - thanks so very much for the straight up "HOW" to correct this pattern. You are wonderful, keep posting please!
Bliss to you,
m
SashaRed1 2 years ago
i love your hair and your videos are brilliant!
WeThePeopleRleaders 2 years ago 2
Much love!
Veya
VeyaMusic 2 years ago
Awareness is the first step!
Awareness + willingness + discipline + courage = Change
askvictoria 2 years ago
breathing is the flow of awareness : )
geraamte 2 years ago
i find myself correcting my boyfriend all the time. he will speak but not correctly and i find myself correcting his grammar, vocab , syntax, everything and in front of people. But i cannot stop the autopilot. i just blurt it out and then i regret it. and i find myself being always defensive. always. why am i so defensive?? i think that i have narcissistic parents ,so maybe i have grown up like that. but i dont want to be like that anymore.
ematakou 2 years ago