Robot Children

[frio109]

Zarbod, the Select. You are Brilliant to deceive the Public Bots with hordes of Illegal Bots. With the complicity of the Federal Bots, all public/civilian Bots will have been over run, over taxed, over NOT sexed by the Global wOrld Dominator bots (GOD robots). Brilliant job Select. Frio, First Science Officer.

[Zarbod]

We need more GOD robots. Did I mention my line of Bree Bots? They're going well. Check out "The Bree Bot 3000"

[frio109]

Zarbod, the Select. I need a Bree Bot 3000 for sex,uh, hmm. I meant I need a Bree Bot 3000 to do my Human Earth Normal House hold chores. Yes thats what I need. A Bree Bot 3000. Frio, First Science Officer.

[Zarbod]

Yeah, the can do lots around the house-I guess.

[frio109]

Zarbod, the Select. The can do's and bending overs is what make the Bree 3000 model so..... uh. talked about this year. Frio, First Science Officer.

[Zarbod]

I'm sorry did you say something? I was just thinking about her rotations and oscillations.

[frio109]

Zarbod, the Select. Paris Sex Whore Bot 50.1 was a success in China. The one that was shipped there was stolen. But I heard it was a great and glorious success! Frio, First Science Officer.

[ddlsr]

yeah! and only half of my toaster works, too

[PlanetZoltar7]

According to my Automation and Optimization Software, Robots are generally considered to be inventory.

A Process Analysis that includes Logistics and Quality Control indicates that Humans are Soft and Squishable.

Therefore and thus, indeed, it stands to reason that Robotic Children are 1.75X10^4.5 times more likely to be Optimal in a varient dependent algorithmic equation driven environment than a Biological Equivalent.

[PlanetZoltar7]

A Statistics based Life-Cycle evaluation indicates that Humans will retire and, upon retirement, they will require extensive and expensive maintenance.

Whereas, upon End of Life Cycle, Robotic Children can be unceremoniously thrown into the dumpster.

Therefore, and thus indeed, Robotic Children are deemed to be not as bad.

[Zarbod]

That's true. These humans are also creating problems since they just refuse to die year after year. I'll vlog on my solution later!

[MBRHIndustries]

I knew those toasters were trouble.

[Zarbod]

That's what the Pop Tart said!

[FISHGAL69]

SUCH A GOODY 2 SHOES...

[PlanetZoltar7]

The next job loss risk is going to be from A.I avatars in V-worlds doing jobs that used to be done by human controlled avatars in V-worlds.

They will use things like agent-based modeling to outperform humans.

[Zarbod]

Out performing humans isn't much of a challenge really.

[PlanetZoltar7]

Zarbod, have you forgotten?

One of the divisions of Zar-Star Investments has a controlling interest in a robotics manufacturing facility.

How are we going to make that 778% interest if you go getting all socially responsible on us?

Remember our Motto: "Stick it to 'em and make 778% interest, guaranteed !"

[withoutashore]

I'm okay with the toasters but the other ones sounds kinda scary!

[Zarbod]

How about blenders?

[withoutashore]

Yeah I'm down with the blenders, man. They're cool too.

[RiddleSpider]

I have decided to keep robots as pets instead of these pesky fur covered cats. What's your opinion on robot pets?

[Zarbod]

Probably safer. Cats have the habit of stopping my lungs from working so I'm not a big fan of them. As far as digital pets, I've actually been programming virtual boids to test emergent behavior mathematics. but I suppose that everyone is doing that these days.

[RiddleSpider]

That's how we spend our Saturdays, not much else to do in Iowa.

[Zarbod]

Do you ever build big mazes in the corn fields? That woudl be cool.

[RiddleSpider]

We try but we always get lost and have to light a fire to find our way to safety.

[Rowdyeh]

I dunno, bots will leave spent batteries around where you could step on them, I'm just thinking it'd probably cost a fortune for the toilet training software. I dont fancy cleaning battery acid off my shoes all the time, nasty stuff!

[Zarbod]

Sounds messy.

[rentacrip]

do you have to take a lot of showers to get rid of that wet cardbord smell?

[Zarbod]

Yes, but it took even longer because I that I should leave the cardboard out of the shower with me. Who knew?

[rentacrip]

you rock zarbod where do u live ??????hmmmmmm.I bet you live in Nevada ,In or around groomlake?Dose your address have a one and a five in it?

[Zarbod]

I live in a Hangar. Why do you ask?

[marymary47]

TOASTERS

[Zarbod]

Yes, toasters!

[batatakley]

I could use a Robot to hold my cotton candy so I can eat effortless!LOL lazy VAL! hugs for you Zarbod!

[Zarbod]

That sounds little lazy. Good thinking!

[GregGallows]

oh my god ... NOT THE TOASTERS!!!

*hides*

[Zarbod]

Greg, yeah, I'd keep my eye on the Pop Tarts too. They are toaster sympathizers.

[PlanetZoltar7]

Pop Tarts? Do you mean like Brittany Spears?

[ThatsAshley]

Yummy.

[Zarbod]

And Christina

[fuzzfoot]

Yes, someday even these YouTube videos will be made by a ZarBot.

[Zarbod]

That would be a lot easier actually.

[blackbart99]

Mexican agra bots...very funny!

[Zarbod]

Muy Buenos!

[moomay11649]

I HAVE A CHILD ROBOT.

[Zarbod]

You must have bought one of our Fem Bots huh? Sometimes Child Robots come along later.

[siilverblue]

Toasters make me so mad! :/

[Zarbod]

Silver, if they bug you I'd recommend stabbing it with a knife. Just jam it down into the coils and see what happens.

[Dog480]

I have a shotgun and I know ther is a toaster lurking in my kitchen as we speak. I intend to just stick the barrel around the corner & let it have 5-6 rounds of double aught buckshot. I'll let you know if it's effective......

[Zarbod]

Sounds like a good plan. Might want to run it by the wife first though.

[Dog480]

I can't figure out why, but she packed up & split while I was on a huntin' trip.....

[Rowdyeh]

Just make sure the knife has an insulated handle or you'll end up toasted!

[Zarbod]

I never worry myself with insulation. I'm sure your flesh will work just fine.

[PlanetZoltar7]

You could always drown them. Wait until you're in the tub, and when they're not looking, grab them and hold them under water. Lots of fun.

[Zarbod]

Another great idea. Let me know how it goes.

[Dog480]

Won't I need scuba gear for that?

[Zarbod]

Well, you won't need scuba gear afterwards. That's for sure.

[moscowmasha]

I've got to be honest with you: I'm one of the robots. And I'm out to steal YOUR job.

Beware.

[SylKinder]

Come on....do u really wanna be an alien who keeps having "investin ideas" that do not work?...It's pretty hard to be an alien this days... u should go after pedro's job...

[Zarbod]

You make a good point. Is there a school for such things?

[sensiblechic303]

Pedro cannot be replaced by robot child labor! It's un-American! Zarbod... you're hot and cool.

[Zarbod]

Well, let's see how many Child Robots Pedro can fight at once.

[kenc54]

One world baby. One frelling world.

[Zarbod]

Is this part of NAFTA or the GATT? Or is it Sky Net.

[DIZZYZAP478]

Well were screwed. Can I be mentioned in the next video? But really,those robots want a world of there own. So thats why we must destroy the robots before something bad happens. Unless it dosnt. Then ill just go watch TV.

[Zarbod]

I guess I could fit you into tomorrow's episode. You'll have to watch real close.

[DIZZYZAP478]

YAYZ

[ladypn]

I'm not really here. I'm working. At a job. In my life. My real life. The one I have outside of Youtube. :)

[SylKinder]

Yeah... we can see that =/

oh well, good luck in ur job...enjoy while u can !!!

[Zarbod]

"Real life". Please don't bring up that dark subject. I think we're all here to avoid thinking about real life. It's either YouTube or booze. But friends don't let friends drink and vlog.

[Swazi88]

AHHH robots!!! Everyone Pull out your plasma Rifles

[Zarbod]

Maybe we could reason with them?

[distorteddogma]

You realize, of course, this could detrimentally affect the US stores of AA, C, and D cell batteries...

Be Well.

[Zarbod]

Dogma I'm not sure if they're AC or DC. They may even go both ways, but I try to discourage that.

[justwatchin07]

Interesting...I never thought there would be illegal robot children crossing our borders,too. Seems that wall probably woulndn't help, would it?

[Zarbod]

Wouldn't hurt!

[Keeneyville1]

Bi bots? What'll they think of next? No wait, don't tell me, I can guess.

[Zarbod]

Tri Bots?

[Keeneyville1]

I heard they'll tri anything!

[Zarbod]

Only if you Bi them first.

[fuzzfoot]

Quarter bots will tri anything for a quarter!

[Zarbod]

You should see those quarter bots after they drink a fifth of scotch. And Seven ate the Nine Bots.

[Blargaldalien]

Seven of none? Babe-alicious!

[Virginian9000]

Zarbod has been in the fiction section again.

[ThatsAshley]

Sometimes Truth is stranger than fiction.

[Zarbod]

Ashley, is it stranger than friction?

[Zarbod]

I have been. What does "fiction" mean anyway?

[Doublebug1]

fiction means made up. Is this your real face dude or is it fiction? I love ya either way but I really want to know! Are you of the fictitious sort?

[Zarbod]

So you want to know if I exist? Hmm. Hard to say. Is not all existence verified by our unreliable perceptions? Perhaps all is an illusion. I believe it was Decartes's second Meditation which stated that we can only be sure of our own existance. I think there for I am...and you May be. So I can't prove to you that I exist. I know I exist, but I can't prove it to you. I can't even prove to myself that you exist.

[Doublebug1]

So, are you like a higher species that evolved from the Human or are you from another planet? If you are from Earth, did you get teased in School or were you Homeschooled?

[Zarbod]

I'm from another planet. Humans are basically like my pets. You know, like that song "Pets" by Porno For Piros. Ever hear that one?

[Doublebug1]

You are cool Zarbod. You can thank BibleGirl for my subscription. Well, thank yourself too because if it wasn't for your involvement with her I would not have made it here. Keep on keeping on!

[Zarbod]

Thanks Doublebug1. Biblegirl is the bestest! Have you checked out The Gnooze channel yet? Marta is pretty funny too.