Battles of Tosh: Dane Cook versus Daniel Tosh

[ggforme1337]

NO YOU WERE NOT AT THE FUCKING MALL DANE .. DO UR DAMN JOKE

[NikeDude72]

what tosh stand up is that it sounds funny

[XxLoveToDuskxX]

Wooow.. over half the comments are soo mature.. 

[xmywreckingballx]

@XxLoveToDuskxX You don't need a license or an education to be a YouTube user.

[XxLoveToDuskxX]

@xmywreckingballx I know this. 

[sen11672]

I do personally like Dane Cook but his comedy is not for everybody and I prefer him as an actor than a comedian (yes, I think he is a talented actor). As for stand up comedy, I think Daniel Tosh is more clever and snappy.

[MUNDOM316]

@sen11672 i agree

[MichaelSorrentino]

@sen11672 I think you are the only person that thinks Dane Cook is a good actor.

[bosiblast]

Tosh just makes really racist jokes

[bosiblast]

Dane Cook is fucking hilarious!

[carterakaballla]

@SplatTv1 Yeah micheal lynch is the gayest kid in lawrenceburg

[SplatTv1]

LYNCH IM RIGHT!!!!!!

[rossmat707]

Dane cook writes jokes for 13 year olds and retarded people

[AmaraTheHedgehog2345]

They're both equally good comedians. I've found the perfect piece in argument.

[unchartedjdz9]

Tosh is way funnier

[TheLandOfCows]

dane cook is wayyyy funnier than tosh, only white people would laugh at tosh's jokes....

[naujified]

@TheLandOfCows are u retarded?thats a load of bs only people who like dane are girls becuz girls are tools and anyone likes tosh

[TheLandOfCows]

@naujified i love watching stand up and ive seen both of them, daniel tosh's jokes aren't that funny, yes he has some good jokes and i giggled but he never made me laugh, dane cook on the other hand actually says jokes that are funny, now when i say this im talking about his past stand ups from like 2006, i agree nowadays his stand ups aren't funny or wat it used to be, but personally i think dane cook makes you laugh more.

[naujified]

@TheLandOfCows well idk wut ur on but yea i watched his newest stand up when the crowd are cheering most of the time and the man barely speaks ffs!

[naujified]

@TheLandOfCows but yea sumtimes i really dont kno wut tosh is talkin bout but when he funny hes realy funny haha

[jasandobal]

go tosh!

[justforyt98]

Should be renamed "Daniel Tosh VS dane cook" gotta put the crowd drawers name first=P

[jfizzmonkeybutt]

Dane Cook was only funny in Waiting.

"Calvin works here!"

[eminemisthebestrocks]

PLEASE WATCH MY VIDEOS THANX

[gangsta46197]

woah... whats with all this negativity

[bwc3821]

They both suck

[thenarddog13]

I like both comedians as they our both equally funny in my opinion. Dane Cook is more physical so he moves around more on stage which can be funny at times. However Daniel Tosh puts more thought into his jokes. Again this is just my opinion.

[BeardofNorris]

cock and balls

[SouthParkBear]

It's DUELLING SUCK-ASSES!

[Zeneotchritrixstan]

Dane cook just goes off on random pointless shit telling stories and tries to make it funny. Daniel Tosh actually has some punches to his joke, especially with alot of the shock humor he uses.

[SouthParkBear]

@Zeneotchritrixstan

They both still SUCK ASS.



[IETCHX69]

@Zeneotchritrixstan try explaining this to these reeetards

[bryceXcore]

Dane Cook isn't funny, that's all that needs to be said.

[lilsister2]

LMFAO! Enough typed.

[chingy5505]

Your all fags Tosh is the only good comedian

[MCCENTx2]

perfect

[RealityIsFatality]

I like both, umad bro?

[bleedingblue000]

DANE COOK IS NOT FUNNY!

[CoolerKing37]

They're both pretty mediocre.

[grendelee]

@CoolerKing37 You are half right

[Charsept]

this isnt biased at all

[IETCHX69]

dane cook is weak and tiny brained.. if u like him you are what Doctors call "retarded"

[inEarthCEO]

@IETCHX69 What do you call people that put proper nouns in lower case and nouns in upper case? Something similar to "retarded"?

[IETCHX69]

@inEarthCEO water ewe Tocking abowt?

[inEarthCEO]

@IETCHX69 nevermind, I don't have crayons to explain it to you.

[SouthParkBear]

@IETCHX69

It's only fair-- retards needs to laugh too

We laugh at them, after all

[IETCHX69]

@SouthParkBear first person to agree with me about ANYTHING on th e fkn internet

[SouthParkBear]

@IETCHX69

Unfortunately, the internet is the only technology that retards seem to understand-- that's why there's so many of them ON it!

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

That would also make you a retard, a retarded hypocrite to be exact.

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

You're too retarded to understand how stupid that is, otherwise you wouldn't have said it.

You're obviously also a cyber-stalker-- but that makes sense because you're also a closet GAY!

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

closet gay? Really? You win, that is pretty stupid.

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

No, you win....retards VOTE.

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

I don't vote, but ok

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

Couldn't figure it out, huh.

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

Nope because I don't speak idiot. Trying completing your sentences jack ass.

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

Try completing your sentences jackass.

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

You couldn't figure that out either? No surprise there.

[eighnasa]

@IETCHX69

The fact that you agree with him, makes you a bigger idiot than he is, and who the fuck cares who agrees with them on the internet. It's the fucking internet you needy bastard. If you want someone to agree with you get a religion. How stupid can y'all two be, damn! Don't bother responding, I don't really care what you think.

[IETCHX69]

@eighnasa take ur dads cock out of ur mouth mumbles

[eighnasa]

@IETCHX69

Take your dads cock out your ass.

[fathersky5]

Tosh wins, every time. Haven't even watched the clip and I already know.

[obglobgablob]

Flawless victory goes to Tosh, clearly.

[TheClanOfMan]

HI IM DANE COOK! SINCE NONE OF MY JOKES ARE FUNNY, I YELL THEM ALL SO PEOPLE MIGHT ACTUALLY LAUGH AT THEM!!

[huffrya0]

Dane cook is an asshole

[ChildrenOfInfidelity]

@huffrya0 LOL, so is Daniel Tosh. They're comedians. Of course they're assholes.

[SouthParkBear]

@ChildrenOfInfidelity

And they both SUCK ASS.

Seriously, what does it take for Comedy Central to look at someone and say "This guy SUCKS!"

Apparently someone worse than Tosh or Dane Cook or Carlos Mencia... in other words, NOBODY!

[skoockum]

@huffrya0 to the core

[gigel2006]

Both suck. George Carlin forever..

[Drewitall54]

Cant TOSH This

[michael45672]

Tosh all the way

[eyestepback]

Tosh is smart, cook is stupid. If you don't like tosh its because you don't get his jokes and you want delivery rather than content, Im guessing you voted for Obama as well. You can see how thats turned out.

[BigkKinny]

@eyestepback Now I like Tosh, but why can't someone simply not like Tosh? Doesn't make them stupid. Learn how to deal with the fact that not everyone like the same thing.It's why different comics exist. And voting for Obama has nothing to do with your comical taste.If you feel you're smart, you wouldn't hide behind comedians to prove it, or politics to help yourself believe you're an intellectual.

[eighnasa]

@eyestepback

Just curious, what does Obama have to do with comedians. Also, what is Obama doing wrong? He can't get anything done because of the republicans. Last question, was Bush better to you?

[eyestepback]

@eighnasa I relate them to Obama because he has great showmanship but doesn't deliver. Just saying things people want to hear. Obama made PROMISES he didn't keep like 16 week and the troops out. didn't happen. He took money out of the health system and put it into Obamacare fed owned which definatly hasn't done any good. Senate aside, he is running up our deficit, causing inflation is not going to help anything. Bush was just because of the people, idk much about bush i wan't as involved then

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

Because Obama's presidency is a bigger joke than either of these two douchebags who call themselves "comedians."

As for what obama's doing wrong, if you have to ask you are a bigger retard than Dane Cook AND Tosh combined.

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

Is his presidency a bigger joke than Bush's. I don't think so. And as for the retard statement, how pathetic must you be to answer a question by calling someone a retard. The only reason I don't know what he is doing wrong is because I'm too busy in school, working, and spending time with my friends to pay attention to everything that he is doing. Now, if YOU want to stop being a pathetic twit and answer my question intelligently. Then go ahead other wise.....

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

Stop giving retarded responses just because you don't like Obama and can't come up with a legitimate reason not to like him, so instead you just call me a retard because you are too incompetent to answer a question with any integrity or intelligence. You are bitch, now if you don't have anything knowledgeable to say then don't fucking say shit to me. Pussy.

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

Matter of fact. Don't even comment or say shit to me. Its obvious you too stupid to tell me anything worth knowing anyway. Otherwise, you would have done it in your previous comment. Now go back to being a lonely loser bitch, who has nothing better to do other than insult people on youtube. Because it's obvious you had to search for my post since it's a month old. I wish you would have called me a retard in person. You would have been in the fucking ground.

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

You're a fucking retard.



[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

Bitch Please

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

No, you really are. If you follow Obama, you're a bigger retard than he is-- and he is an idiot.

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

I don't follow any politician because they ALL are liars and full of shit. And you are the retard if you keep talking about someone without any supporting evidence against them. Man you're stupid. All I've been asking is what's wrong with Obama, that doesn't mean I support him. I just want you and all the other haters of Obama to elaborate on why you think he's an idiot. Is that so hard? Or are you too stupid to do that? Hell, Obama is more intelligent than his predecessor. IMO

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

I'm not going to quibble with you over why he's an idiot, since if you have to ASK then you're a fucking regard.

You just want to argue, and I don't argue with idiots.

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

"fucking regard"? Don't get so mad that you start typing like a retard? And bitch you started the fight by commenting on my comment and calling me a retard. So shut all that shit up about me wanting to argue. Man you're stupid. And you still can't justify why he's an idiot. So my point has been proven. Bye bitch.

[SouthParkBear]

@eighnasa

Retards laugh at typos.

[eighnasa]

@SouthParkBear

-_- I didn't laugh...like at all....you must have trouble reading comments too. Just quit. Your level of stupidity is just too much, just leave and never come back. Thank you.

[SouthParkBear]

@eyestepback

Tosh sucks as as much as Cook. They BOTH suck ass, and with Mencia they make the Three Splooges.

[Stevesk0011]

dane cook should've got a show....it should be Cook.0 Actually no forget that....he would be a total douche if he did that lol

[chibangin007]

dane cook sucks

[dallasharless88]

how do you not laugh at dane cook unless you have no sense of humor ...i like daniel tosh kuz he dont care about the haters

[TLbaby12]

daniel tosh is garbage...

[swimmer2190]

Dane cook is stupid, i dont like him, plus his jokes arent funny, they are stupid and his voice is annoying, i have never seen cook get into his comedy the way daniel does, plus, cook doesnt have a tv show, is he did, no one would watch it and tosh.o would get an extra 30 minutes and couple hundred thousand dollars.

daniel tosh though,

I FREAKIN LOVE HIM HE IS LIKE THE FUNNIEST PERSON ALIVE!!!! his show, is the best. wa better than anything ever. my older cousins and i bond over his show :)

[jtdfashodawg]

@swimmer2190 wtf

[SouthParkBear]

@swimmer2190

You're INSANE.

Cook sucks, true, but Tosh is no better-- like when he says "you know, they should give white guys an extra point when playing basketball."

Ok, does he REALLY think we haven't heard every joke about black players being better at basketball?

The only balls he knows about are the ones he SUCKS every time he's on stage!

[ryanbrownlee]

@swimmer2190 umm... dane cook has movies. 

[MrThewarning]

tosh is the best hands down i do like dane cook hes a great comic but the way tosh says and puts his jokes out there and he does not care about race bring on the racist jokes :D

[BaconismyBF]

Tosh has the worst delivery out of any comedian Ive ever seen, and most people know him from his terrible show, the one where he doesnt even write his own jokes for it. Cook is pretty lame, but at least he doesnt use lame shock jokes to get attention. Cook > faggy tosh

[34thedoctor]

@BaconismyBF i'll admit tosh does ramble sometimes in his jokes, but i feel that the scenario's he puts out are a little more vivid than Cook's.

No comment on the fag thing :)

[shugazere]

mitch headberg won that round, obviously

[xmywreckingballx]

@shugazere Headberg = one of loaf of bread, subway = x - 1 loaf of bread

[sweetdictator]

I am not sure why I watched this, I think they both suck balls

[pumpjocky14]

7 people like dane cook

[kimblesteven]

Dane is funny if your a little kid or stoned. Tosh is funny if your intelligent enough to get all his jokes and references, which most people aren't. That's why Dane is more popular, he takes no brain power whatsoever to laugh at

[50Cal420]

competitive comedy is impossible. everyone is fucking different.

[imwickedbored22]

@tlbaby12 and don't diss tosh because you have a different taste in humor. grow the fuck up. I personally find both of them funny in their own ways. chill out.

[imwickedbored22]

@tlbaby12 Justin bieber sounds like someone is squeezing his nuts when he sings. I agree Miley Cyrus sucks too, but don't defend bieber.

[HeathenForFun]

@rhcprocks97 Best at what?

Spazzing out and flailing around on stage while telling stories with no punchlines that are supposed to be funny why? Because he's acting like a retard?

[TLbaby12]

Tosh is just awful, his comedy is the same as a teenager in class that is tries way to hard to be a class clown...cook is a pure comic genious.

[HeathenForFun]

@TLbaby12 I agree, Cook is pure comic genious, he's so unfunny, yet somehow how lots of fans. Best joke ever!

[TLbaby12]

@HeathenForFun yeah thats why hes sold out the garden more times than you can count and all his albums went platnum hahahahaha

[HeathenForFun]

@TLbaby12

Yeah, Dane Cook selling out the garden and having platinum records makes him good...

Because we all know... Popular = Good....

Millions of teenage girls like Justin Beiber therefor he must be a good vocalist! -_-

[TLbaby12]

@HeathenForFun i think your getting beiber mixed up with the shitty miley cyrus, now that would be a good example of fans blinded by a horrible singer. Usher wouldnt have managed the kid if he wasnt talented. Dane Cook wouldnt be where he is if he wasnt talented. Thats why Kevin hart is making his rise to the top as well not Daniel Tosh cause his jokes are plain and stupid.

[HeathenForFun]

@TLbaby12 The fact that I have a disconnect with his fans though probably stems from my personal taste in comedy though. I like jokes that are deep, dark and sadistic, not the kind of jokes Dane tells.

[martion41496]

Tosh is way better than cook

[martion41496]

Tosh-cook.

[StayxBrutalx]

@rhcprocks97 Yeah if you're 5 years old.

[freax4u]

karate the dane cook of martial arts

[SasquatchLegend]

@rhcprocks97 This is a video COMPARING TWO COMEDIANS, you tard.

[SuperWeeNinja]

@sktrfb123 Are you retarded? I didn't know retarded speech impediments translated through text. A brother and a sister monkey could fuck and have a smarter byproduct than you.

[MewmewMeower]

Too bad Daniel Tosh's newest stand up DvD is absolutely FULL of segways like this over and over again and again... Someone should record the 50 or so segways in Tosh's "Happy Thoughts" and put that up against this statement, as he very much does use them now.

[theoriginalscuffles]

@partyjamj shut the fuck up,

argument ended!

[partyjamj]

all you fuckers protecting dave cook are idiots, how is his shit funny? it might be entertaining but not funny, dont get the two emotions confused. Bottom line he is a comedian, but isnt funny thats why he's in movies now. case and point.

[RRingo123]

@skaterfb123 I can't understand a word of that...

[prettyheartmakeup]

Both!!

[RRingo123]

@skaterfb123 No. I never liked Dane Cook.

[Cosmickey86]

Tosh: acerbic wit

Cook: physical comedy

Take your pick, they are both good at what they do.

[facenda21]

really? cook aint even funny. maybe when i was 16 and really didnt give a crap whos on comedy central. tosh is by far the funniest and the most real comedian out there. im waiting for cooks plane to crash so i dont have to hear another one of his mediocre specials again, hahaha

[RRingo123]

@skaterfb123 umm..we say dane cook sucks because he does. He's unoriginal and unfunny. And btw, your spelling is atrocious

[TheBeast704]

Tosh is ways better than dane cook. Dane needs to stop everything he does including the shitty movies.

[halogirlelite]

tosh is the best.

[1mrbikerman1]

Can't decide which one is more annoying.

[cartman7777]

Dane Cook is a joke thief and a douchey hack. Other than that he's just super!

[talbotd27]

when dane cook said he wanted 2 b a comedian every1 laughed at him. well... nobodys laughing now

[megadethandbloodd]

@talbotd27 this was the hardest i ever lold you deserve an award!

[etfs2424kool]

mr. tosh cuz he the along funny thing or person on the air who he makes blonde go lol but what they dont know is hes makeing fun of u.

[fleetcadi1]

Dane Cook is a cock sucker takes 30 minutes per joke and ther ripped off daniel tosh has a new joke every 2 minutes and every one of toshes 2 minutes jokes are way better than shit bag Dane Cooks 30 minute or even 25 minute jokes that dane steals

[ZombieSpree]

@fleetcadi1

Right, Daniel Tosh was totally in the business before Dane Cook, and it's just fucking terrible to use the same subject as another comedian. Shut the fuck up.

[ScoopMcGillicutty]

Why can't we like both?

It's Comedy, not the Elections..

[RandomChaosprod]

Ummm Dane cook sucks. Tosh is hilarious.

[Ryakki]

Well, alright... Tosh is pretty funny some times.

But he tries too hard.

[Ryakki]

No, dane cook is not funny. Tosh isn't that funny either but his videos are good, at least.

[zolm]

tosh is a bigger douche ofcourse

[cordowen747]

i rather dane but daniel is funny too

[xxxHExISxLEGENDxxx]

i think they're both funny in their own ways... but Daniel Tosh is slightly less popular. why? because there are a lot of dumb people in the world that can't keep up with his comedy, plus its much more original and edgy.

[Tortman18]

both are overrated, bill hicks and sam kinnison are better than both of them. daniel tosh is better than dane cook though

[Mrwubz]

@Tortman18 thats funny, i dont remember seeing those names in this video

[markuseraccount]

@Tortman18 wtf tosh is a 1000x funnier than them...if they were put on national television they would have the worst fucking ratings cause noone would like them...stop having personal attachments to old school comedians...tosh is way funnier

[galily69]

TOSH!!!!

[bojanks15]

tosh

[LukeDachsund]

Totally different comedians. They are both good. Live with it haters

[MasterDragonNinja]

@LukeDachsund Dane Crook is a joke thief. 

[raiderrocker18]

forget tosh vs dane cook. dane cook straight up is NOT one of the top tier comedians. he's funny at times, but doesn't rank that high

[00SuperMaria00]

God, I love them both! <3 XD

[dudewhereami56]

i think they are both really funny, but i think they have different styles of funny. its hard to explain but i do think daniel is just a little funnier just to be honest haha

[0wn4g3M4st3r]

Daniel is original. Dane isn't. Done.

[rectangle12341]

tosh is better but the first person that i heard make fun of dane cook was a canadian battle rapper named charron.

[TheEvilPadawan]

Fuck Tosh he's shit. Dane is hilarious and awesome

[rectangle12341]

@TheEvilPadawan you win you are the funniest

[TheEvilPadawan]

@rectangle12341 Thank you for your kind opinion but you're just a tiny bit off ;)

[Cl3ver]

They are both funny. You guys hate Dane Cook because hes popular. Youtube hipsters.

[TravisTrixta85]

@Cl3ver Actually most people hate Dane Cook because he steals jokes.

[maxrieser]

all my friends loveee tosh. o and i fucking hate the show

[jbs4life]

Dane Cook steals jokes, Tosh isn't even funny..

[aaronthemoose94]

uggh maybe he was at the mall...? wtf its telling a story dickass.. better than your lame ass 1 liners from your internet video tv show that never airs when people are watching.

[21cestlavie]

@SgtHonky and you must be super poor, because your not funny at all.

[JShadow94]

lmao fuck dane cook DANIEL TOSH IS FUNNIER WAAAAY FUNNIER :)

[MagicByStarlight]

I like their comedy, but both them seem like they're really shitty people.

[Rorix9]

@MagicByStarlight ahh yes yes yes...i have had a weird feeling about both of them and never really articulated (sp?) it. I believe your comment describes that feeling very accurately.

I prefer Daniel Tosh to Dane Cook.....BUT, I still agree with your statement.

[vikingninja1994]

@dontplayformenero if that's your logic, than no wonder the doctor told her mom she should have had an abortion...

[MrCynix]

The fuck is this? Dane Cook is the Rebecca Black of comedy.

[megadethandbloodd]

@MrCynix no, hes the justin bieber of comedy.

Overrated, and his fan base is 8-15 years old

[MrCynix]

@megadethandbloodd In Ms. Bieber's defense, unlike Dane Cook, she actually has some talent - but don't let that cloud fact that she's still an annoying bitch. Rebecca Black, on the other hand, is pure garbage, no matter how you twist and turn it.

Let's just agree that Dane Cook sucks, shall we?

[MrVaoy]

@MrCynix DANE COOK IS DA BEST



[megadethandbloodd]

@MrCynix lol agreed