"I build and build but the amass of entropy is doomed to overcome the beauty in all or everything one could create"
Sounds to me like your feeling down about the worth of any one humans creations. Glad to know your out there feeling, living, breathing but I fundamentally disagree with the sentiment. Hope you don't mind that someone, somewhere feels, breaths and lives something different. I'd feel doomed if entropy couldn't shatter the ephemeral brilliance of any individual soul.
@azacs oh that last part is cute. theirs an idea that i've been working on... maybe i'll be able to get it out and you can tack on little complements where ever you see fit.
@CelphaFiael yes and i've seen what's become of you. maybe at my wedding i'll fly you out here for my girls bachelorette party.... i think it would make for a nice compilation video... make all the fans go just wild... i could just see it now....
Lucas, thanks for the clarification. The beauty of poetry in my humble opinion is that much of the interpretation from a reader's perspective plays to their mindset. I guess for me dullness due to noise is was something I directly connected with. That being said, I will always defer to the true meaning from the author and perhaps cling to my own interpretation internally or only when discussing it with others. I greatly appreciate the dialogue and keep writing bro! It is indeed journey!
i am not very good at giving advice, if you want to know my favorite poets then here is a short list, SHAKESPEARE-- WORDSWORTH--KEATS--BRONTE--FROST--DONNE-- CUMMINGS-- PLATH-- SEXTON-- there are just too many. What kind of poetry do you think you might like?
that was freken beautiful ! - - i want to walk out in the rain, and stay awhile, maybe sit and watch puddles gather, without a thought of tomorrow, without a coat or shoes or passing car in any lane.-----------------How beautiful if sorrow had not made sorrow more beautiful than beautys self----------John Keats
you make me wish i studied poerty. knew more authors. most of it says very little to me. maybe i dont' really have to ability to see such beauty in other peoples work. i now what power it can have. i've met and shook poets hands but i feel i'm not there yet, nor are most of the things everyone produces. on the grand sheme it usually nothing.... but words can make the earth stop, like a heart sink...
My take on your amazing poem is that for me it was about the disintegration of the individual in a society full of noise. That no matter how hard we try to listen to that one voice that matters, our own, that there are just too many voices barking noise to hear the one. And that the symbols of old have been replaced, dismissed even or just repainted a completely different color. What once was considered beautiful is now dull, not ugly...just dull. Close or not even in the ballpark?
there are those element with in the piece, and if assembled they make dozens of different understandings, which is one of the beauties of poetry. in past works i have been focusing on the dullness and the noise...
but this is more a qusi-political social-economical poem
i wanted to paint a picture with my descriptions, exposing the seams of our problems. and by example offering my solution
first i must say from experience you would be much better off putting out that ciggerete, it will help you think more clearly and save your lungs. this poem good, i think it is about the pressures of life , including population and pollution and greed , theres on thing i dont get and that is --the massive entropy doomed to overcome the beauty , - your poem is a building and the massive entropy is doomed,, to overcome the beauty? = The blood jet is poetry, there is no stopping it = Sylvia Plath
@USERNAMEDSOBER about the cigarette i have a poem about that if you like to hear my conflict it's stupidly called "castrate the soul"
and the like is "the amass of entropy is doomed to over come the beauty" they say there's a measure of randomness and disorder givin the so many varables that support these evolving systems (they evolve yet without purpose, or direction, only to sustain) how ever small, or big. the system that i refer to in this poem is losly based on the abstraction....
of reality, society, and the forces that keep us stagnant, while it grows. disorder, pollution, population these things (among countless others) push toward what seem to be the bane of all creation. while resources, natural and not, like information and knowledge are becoming more isolated in pockets and used unwisely to selfish benefit.
so out of fear i build. building in the physical since. emotional and spiritual attempting to astablish order and direction for myself....
... and for the world around me. and i plead really for people to reconize the extent of their actions and butterfly wing flaps and maybe collectively pull ourselves out of this mess...
and understand that life is a process, and that we are never finish, though the ripple from the actions of our existence have the ability to affect millions positivity. we just have to flap our little wings hard enough.
i want to cause hurricanes. i want to over come the entropy
ya i dont get it
awsomecutegirl1 1 year ago
@awsomecutegirl1 it's ok. its a collection of terms that build expression. some you might not be familiar with... keep up the writing
newcomposition 1 year ago
@newcomposition okkkkkk
awsomecutegirl1 1 year ago
@awsomecutegirl1 ok
newcomposition 11 months ago
"I build and build but the amass of entropy is doomed to overcome the beauty in all or everything one could create"
Sounds to me like your feeling down about the worth of any one humans creations. Glad to know your out there feeling, living, breathing but I fundamentally disagree with the sentiment. Hope you don't mind that someone, somewhere feels, breaths and lives something different. I'd feel doomed if entropy couldn't shatter the ephemeral brilliance of any individual soul.
azacs 1 year ago
@azacs oh that last part is cute. theirs an idea that i've been working on... maybe i'll be able to get it out and you can tack on little complements where ever you see fit.
newcomposition 1 year ago
@newcomposition sounds interesting. Looking forward to seeing what you're talking about.
azacs 1 year ago
Why are tortured artists so fucking hot!? I am old enough to be his Dad, but He is so HOT!
TheSpencer1960 1 year ago
"Our steam has broke the engines belonging to our ingenuity."
"to exhale the frail functions, expelling the tomes trapped in my thoughts,"
"I fear when I am no longer here to build."
strike me as phrases i need to keep in my mind. as helping hands or as fists; either will do.
CelphaFiael 1 year ago
been a while lucas. glad to see you're still producing quality art. the entropy hasn't gotten you. it's everywhere. =)
CelphaFiael 1 year ago
@CelphaFiael yes and i've seen what's become of you. maybe at my wedding i'll fly you out here for my girls bachelorette party.... i think it would make for a nice compilation video... make all the fans go just wild... i could just see it now....
newcomposition 1 year ago
Lucas, thanks for the clarification. The beauty of poetry in my humble opinion is that much of the interpretation from a reader's perspective plays to their mindset. I guess for me dullness due to noise is was something I directly connected with. That being said, I will always defer to the true meaning from the author and perhaps cling to my own interpretation internally or only when discussing it with others. I greatly appreciate the dialogue and keep writing bro! It is indeed journey!
madixon2 1 year ago
@madixon2
nice.
newcomposition 1 year ago
@madixon2
nice. and thankd
newcomposition 1 year ago
i am not very good at giving advice, if you want to know my favorite poets then here is a short list, SHAKESPEARE-- WORDSWORTH--KEATS--BRONTE--FROST--DONNE-- CUMMINGS-- PLATH-- SEXTON-- there are just too many. What kind of poetry do you think you might like?
USERNAMEDSOBER 1 year ago
that was freken beautiful ! - - i want to walk out in the rain, and stay awhile, maybe sit and watch puddles gather, without a thought of tomorrow, without a coat or shoes or passing car in any lane.-----------------How beautiful if sorrow had not made sorrow more beautiful than beautys self----------John Keats
USERNAMEDSOBER 1 year ago
@USERNAMEDSOBER
you make me wish i studied poerty. knew more authors. most of it says very little to me. maybe i dont' really have to ability to see such beauty in other peoples work. i now what power it can have. i've met and shook poets hands but i feel i'm not there yet, nor are most of the things everyone produces. on the grand sheme it usually nothing.... but words can make the earth stop, like a heart sink...
tell me who should i read to get better
newcomposition 1 year ago
I can see your eyes.
Forgot what they looked like behind your glasses.
You wield your words so well. Keep going.
fellowtuber123 1 year ago
@fellowtuber123
how can i not. when i dont write, i complain about not writing, when i do, it's never good enough. everything's a process. i forget sometimes too.
newcomposition 1 year ago
My take on your amazing poem is that for me it was about the disintegration of the individual in a society full of noise. That no matter how hard we try to listen to that one voice that matters, our own, that there are just too many voices barking noise to hear the one. And that the symbols of old have been replaced, dismissed even or just repainted a completely different color. What once was considered beautiful is now dull, not ugly...just dull. Close or not even in the ballpark?
madixon2 1 year ago
@madixon2
there are those element with in the piece, and if assembled they make dozens of different understandings, which is one of the beauties of poetry. in past works i have been focusing on the dullness and the noise...
but this is more a qusi-political social-economical poem
i wanted to paint a picture with my descriptions, exposing the seams of our problems. and by example offering my solution
newcomposition 1 year ago
Wabi Sabi...
:)
ladyofire 1 year ago
@ladyofire
oh?
newcomposition 1 year ago
first i must say from experience you would be much better off putting out that ciggerete, it will help you think more clearly and save your lungs. this poem good, i think it is about the pressures of life , including population and pollution and greed , theres on thing i dont get and that is --the massive entropy doomed to overcome the beauty , - your poem is a building and the massive entropy is doomed,, to overcome the beauty? = The blood jet is poetry, there is no stopping it = Sylvia Plath
USERNAMEDSOBER 1 year ago
@USERNAMEDSOBER about the cigarette i have a poem about that if you like to hear my conflict it's stupidly called "castrate the soul"
and the like is "the amass of entropy is doomed to over come the beauty" they say there's a measure of randomness and disorder givin the so many varables that support these evolving systems (they evolve yet without purpose, or direction, only to sustain) how ever small, or big. the system that i refer to in this poem is losly based on the abstraction....
newcomposition 1 year ago
@USERNAMEDSOBER
of reality, society, and the forces that keep us stagnant, while it grows. disorder, pollution, population these things (among countless others) push toward what seem to be the bane of all creation. while resources, natural and not, like information and knowledge are becoming more isolated in pockets and used unwisely to selfish benefit.
so out of fear i build. building in the physical since. emotional and spiritual attempting to astablish order and direction for myself....
newcomposition 1 year ago
@USERNAMEDSOBER
#3
... and for the world around me. and i plead really for people to reconize the extent of their actions and butterfly wing flaps and maybe collectively pull ourselves out of this mess...
and understand that life is a process, and that we are never finish, though the ripple from the actions of our existence have the ability to affect millions positivity. we just have to flap our little wings hard enough.
i want to cause hurricanes. i want to over come the entropy
newcomposition 1 year ago