Missing Teen's Friends Go On TV To Plead For Her Release, Gossip About Ugly Classmates

[godlovesallah]

i want to strangle both of them and anyone else that talks like that

[Xiansiempre]

"hey retard, give us back our friend"

[houchi69]

Bailiff rims Judge in Chambers.

[houchi69]

Shauna got banned from using tanning beds, thats why she went with the corn rose.

[Maserati7200]

It's funny because so many girls i know (im 18) are literally exactly like this

Like i have a friend whos a girl and whenever she bitches to me about her problems with other girls it's literally exactly this only a little different.. it's like mad libs almost

[Maserati7200]

Hot girls

[ENJager]

Wow that brunette is so hot, Jessica Rothenburg! Great actresses, hilarious, nice job Onion.

[Vyckeris12]

If all the teenage girls in US are like this... Godspeed, fellas. Godspeed.

[alexlemke]

@Vyckeris12 The onion is satire, genius.

[Vyckeris12]

@alexlemke

Thank you, Captain Obvious.

[katsumorymoto]

@Vyckeris12 Thank you, Captain Assface.

[Vyckeris12]

@katsumorymoto

Weak.

[katsumorymoto]

@Vyckeris12 That wasn't a comeback you fucking tool. You need to realize things on a higher level than childish bullshit trolling for once in your pathetic life.

[Vyckeris12]

@katsumorymoto

I wasn't even trolling, but you still got frustrated.

[takadi]

@katsumorymoto

You are such a faggot

[KakkoiiSasuke]

This is crazy realistic.

[jbjindra]

The casting for this is incredible.

[bonezillion]

Girls are like this at school! I love the Twitter updates xD

[kblargh]

credits?

[goliathprime]

I know girls exactly like this.

[rilham2new2]

Jim  : Just know that the two of you and Janelle are in our thought.

Katie : eww..

Meghan: Gross ....

[SoylentCyan]

"Jim and Tracey you don't even know..."

[Kleavers]

Amazing acting.

[BytheseaMrTodd]

omg this was a hilarious segment, the girls are such good actors xDDD I would love to watch more of them, they're so fucking funny xDD

[comrade127]

lol "the two of you and Janelle are in our thoughts"

"eww, gross"

[numafc]

Is this real ? Lol

[HanzSygnal]

These girls are AB SOL UTELY perfect. They should get their own show or something.

[DeepakPawndU]

All of those tweets were posted up 2 minutes ago Lmfao.

[TinnBenn]

@DeepakPawndU Do me a favor and shut up

[DeepakPawndU]

@TinnBenn I don't do dickheads any favors... go get fucked.

[sladerfoster]

lol

Jenelle we went looking for you by the river today, it was so gross and it smelled like shit so you better be thankful

[izie15100]

Oh my god. Those two girls are EXACTLY like these two girls at my school named taylor and cheyenne or something but like everyone hates them cuz they're total stuck up bitches and ew

[TinnBenn]

your welcome

[ShadesOfFall]

The sad part is they were actually more intelligent and less vain and bitchy than most teenage girls.

[TinnBenn]

@ShadesOfFall  The sad part is you believe that statement

[undertow1985]

the one on the right is hot

[AvalonJoyous666]

LMFAO pause @ 0:52 that facebook page is hilarious lol Bring Janelle Home Bitches! roflmao

[TinnBenn]

says @MsBlackswanZ while looking in the mirror

[HanzSygnal]

Best Today Now EVER. "...oh my god, he's like 50..."

[XWarthongX]

this is why high school was so annoying

[dragofchaos]

Salinas!!!!!!

[sizzle9000]

That was spot-on acting from the girls. At least, I hope they're not like that in real life. :P 

[ApatheticElph33]

The comments...my sides hurt xD

[Liberalshinigami]

these people are good actors lol

[burtontoker]

@Liberalshinigami shut the fuck up retard these arent actors its a real news show

[Liberalshinigami]

@burtontoker you fail at trolling

[Liberalshinigami]

@burtontoker I said they were good actors, so what. I don't care if I give it away. You mad?

[Liberalshinigami]

@burtontoker It's not that serious lol. You are so angry right now, that you don't realize that you are doing the same thing I'm doing by arguing with me. Okay bye

[vrockchick89]

The videos are funny, but the reaction of the people who think it's real is the icing on the cake :)

[baldriss]

why didnt they tell the police that she called ? i don't understand this they are so stupid ! only americans would a comedy out of someone's tragedy ! wtf ? seriuosly ?

[michelleissocool]

@baldriss yes, seriously.

[FourthDerivative]

@baldriss

I know, right? They act as if it didn't really happen, like some comedy writer just made it all up. But of course that would be preposterous.

[lukethegreat101]

@baldriss thats the lamest attempt at trying to make people think you believe this is real. Even your not that stupid. your welcome

[benarobinson]

@baldriss Oh, the irony.

[VelaToNorma7]

@baldriss Wow, another idiot that thinks this Onion video is real. And it's a Eurofag too. Surprise, surprise.

[TheBeBeCaCa]

@VelaToNorma7 hey... it's you again! XD you're such a MASSIVE hypocrite.

[TinnBenn]

@baldriss typical lithuanian dumbass

[bradyculous]

This is one of my favourite Today Now! episodes.

[HanzSygnal]

@bradyculous Finest one I think.

[rickygervais1776]

Those girls are good actresses. I think.

[adiasuarus]

THE ONION ISNT REAL NEWS ITS A PARODY OF THE TODAY SHOW

[BrentMHuynh]

I used to called this number 530 270-9105 but then the cops comes my house.

[thecapone45]

Lol, I bet the ending was really just a blooper.

[ashliebelle]

"We call her ballsasaurus because she loves to put balls in her mouth. God I hate her"

[973JJJ]

Don't get me wrong, i'd bang them... but i would murder them after...

[gerwazjana]

@973JJJ ewwww... peadophile alert!!!!!!!!!!! they're like 15 you sicko!

[Tethmes]

@gerwazjana girls look younger these days, not older.

[Nokebu]

@973JJJ

Seems legit.

[VelaToNorma7]

@973JJJ And then bang them again.

[Bettyxox2]

is this meant to be fake or is those real. r these girls just bitchin about?

[iliveforthemaga]

@Bettyxox2 lmfao

this is the onion bro

[TinnBenn]

@Bettyxox2  please educate yourself

[112245245]

All of the comments on any onion news video:

person 1: guys this is totally fake, you're all stupid

person 2: well duh! of course its fake you retard!

Repeat until the end of time.

[ccaian1]

@112245245

And thats what makes theonion awesome

[TinnBenn]

@112245245 Your comment is perhaps the stupidest one ever. Just thought I'd let you know

[112245245]

@TinnBenn lol you take up every comment on this page

[TinnBenn]

@112245245 do me a favor and shut that hole in your face.

[camjilop]

Awh yeah! Those girls be representing the 916!

[alicial3rma]

this is fake..

[sdfsadfsasdfsdfsdsdf]

@alicial3rma yeah no shit sherlock

[TinnBenn]

@alicial3rma how'd you figure that out? /sarcasm

[BlueIsNue]

false y maricon

[SupaTROopa2]

I hate them so much, so much.

[skylerrb]

man onion news is entertaining but it really needs to get funnier. I wish i could write the stories for onion news.

[DaPivotCreature]

So they're searching for Jenelle by criticizing and gossiping on her. Such great friends...

[deaddu]

@DaPivotCreature

seriously? you don't see right through this obviously fake story?

[DaPivotCreature]

@deaddu I know it's a fake story... all of the onions news is fake... I knew that sence the first video i watched from them....

[TinnBenn]

@DaPivotCreature it's joke smartass.

[DaPivotCreature]

@TinnBenn Oh yeah odviously dickhead... Im not stupid. I been knew this was just a parody. all the news the onion brings is just fake news. plus u are so late with that comment, which was like 1 month ago. Coming out of no where trolling other people. Nobody gives a fuck what u think about other poeple comments. mind your business. Damn!!

[TinnBenn]

@DaPivotCreature wow, you're a stupid cunt are you? It's pretty clear you thought this video was real. Don't backtrack now---being stupid is what you do best.

[DaPivotCreature]

@TinnBenn Umm ok "smart one" if thats what u think. I'm pretty sure anybody can tell that i was being sarcastic. I've watched thousands of videos from this person and all my comments were plane sarcasm. So please dont stick your nose where it dont belong. Dont be ignorant. And oh yeah if you wanna troll somebody, come up with somethin better please -_-

[idobelieveinnargles]

I thought I missed high school...this reminded me that I really don't.

[TinnBenn]

@idobelieveinnargles you choose your friends. If you surrounded yourself with assholes, you must be one yourself

[YourCuntingDaughter]

She's like totally wearing sweaters in May...

[1animeaddict]

Whoop! Sacramento!!!!!

[PeterBFC666]

It's not true! Look at another Onion video if you think they're true. Hilarious....but not true

[Paleed123]

"How old is that zit on your tit?"

ahahah woooooow

[tubebullies]

WAIT....... IS THIS REAL?

[chaos190708]

@tubebullies this is so not true!!!

[MARIOFREAK821]

@tubebullies Yes

[DarthSinistris]

@tubebullies Yeah, but they found the girl already.

[TinnBenn]

@tubebullies r u for real? I hope not--cause you'd be really stupid if you're seriously asking this question.

[piechocolatethedos]

These girls could have been pulled straight from my high school.

[kendrat199]

Righteous! I'm from sacramento ! :O

[BitchesCallMeTFree]

The one on the right is hot.

[music4ismylife8]

This isn't even funny

[TinnBenn]

@music4ismylife8 who asked you? 

[xDarthBane]

one of the best onion news i saw in a while

[grant93321]

those two girls are the best actors ive seen on the onion lol, all the onion actors are good though haha, oh and that blonde is really hot.

[housecry]

Inside every middle-aged woman is a teenage girl looking for approval.

[bass4onelastfriday]

haha if janelle was anything like these girls the kidnapper would have killed her within 15 minutes.

[upnext88]

Fuck them not cool to joke about that shit

[Mossgate97]

@upnext88 Fag eat a dick.

[devinmacd33]

"Want To Help? Dial (530) 370-9105, Call Erin A Slut And Hanf Up"

lmfao

[GigawingsVideo]

The male host expression in the end is hilarious!

[JELLYBEAN14380]

I don't like this cause there's nothin funny bout some1 missing and I'm not talkin bout janelle

[tarantulady]

@Mossgate97 You think about faggots a lot.

[Mossgate97]

@tarantulady Meh, its a good insult to throw around, alot of these people will get mad about it because they think its wrong to call people faggots.

[tarantulady]

@JELLYBEAN14380 ... The joke isn't about someone being missing.

[olegforzen]

fake 

[GigawingsVideo]

@olegforzen ekaf

[ldw13794]

@olegforzen orly?

[olegforzen]

@ldw13794

Ya rly

[BiggestBustedsFan]

Their freakin dumb-asses!! but it's so hilarious...and yes this is THE FUTURE AMERICA. That I can't believe!

[SeCONdagenda1]

the future of America nuff said

[flamingarse1]

what fucking bitches they are i fucking hate girls like that

[grant93321]

@flamingarse1 you know this is fake right haha

[flamingarse1]

@grant93321 yes i do 100% im just saying there are plenty people like that in real life

[MrTommypotts611]

Did u see the highway sign

[huuuubaah]

"the two of you will be in our thoughts" -

"ew"... "gross"

LOLOLOLOLOL!

[guitarhamster102]

I'd do them.

[XDXDXDXDXDXDXD]

The laugh of teenage girls makes you instantly self conscious.

[boneman85]

Hilarious!



[karensarahrocks]

I used to be a hot mess express. but then i took a sword to the sky

[CanadaDan1971]

Maybe I'm stating the obvious here but I love how girls shift from genuine worry to incredibly catty teenage girls.

[softdown123]

The brunette is really pretty !

[USA4July1776]

"ugh hung over fml, did 2 many jagerbombs 4 you janelle!"

[ehiggin]

LOL pause at 1:50

[kbrizzy05]

I used to be a hot mess express. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

[s130351]

@kbrizzy05 it's people like you that makes us skyrim players puke

[arghydoodles]

ahahaha

[lilysquitocook]

no this is a ajokeeee

[Mossgate97]

@lilysquitocook Yes it is.

[JeusisLord1]

"how old is that zit on ur tit" lol!

[HIVisaLIE]

great job

[JeusisLord1]

'm sosooooooooooooo hight rite now hhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa­aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabanamalaoaiapa­uapayataraeawqwa

[JeusisLord1]

i thought this was real in till about half way through than i was like :( :) lol

[tapests]

Who the hell cares about gossip?!

[nicoleiscoolrawwwwrr]

Lmfao. Sadly, girls are like this in the suburb I used to live in in San Antonio.... Jesus. Rich white fucks.

[andre51588]

Fucking whores.........

[VerendumGames]

Shaunna is SUCH a hot-mess express.

[Peddant]

Courtney Baxter (Meghan),Jessica Rothenberg (Katie),Tracy Toth (Tracy),Jim Haggerty (Jim).The script is by anonymous writers of little significance.

[jahigh1]

@Peddant THANKS!

[Cdubzhappy]

that brunette is nuts

[titanx9]

I think I know why Janelle left....

[Buzz0Killington]

@titanx9 Yea, Katie and Meghan are way prettier. I wouldn't wanna stand next to them if I were Janelle. She is such a hot mess express!

[JeusisLord1]

@titanx9 lol

[markmcsw]

It gives the actresses real names on IMDB, "Onion News Network" under Episodes By Season, they did another bit on the Today Now episode that was on early November this year. I forget their entires names, Jessica and Courtney are their first names.

[Hetero104]

I thought this was legit for a minute.

[regiraver]

Omg 1:49 read the tweets they did. Sooo funny.

[Nduengo]

TheOnion really got good actors!

[EXTRON180]

lol did anyone actually call? what happened?

[WindBreaker77]

the girl on the right looks like shane dawson lmao

[BiGSaUcY88]

I live in Sac and this is 100% accurate of my high school experience... spot on Onion

[MsFriedchiken]

@BiGSaUcY88 lol u call your city sac lol