What Scientology Says About Scientologists

[MrGetthefuckup]

what aload of bs hahaha

[wo0ordup]

"How did you make my rectum start quoting Garden State?"

[guitarman4eva]

Scientology stole shit from other religions to make it look like a religion, and then they murder their life long members when they want to quit :D

[pappegye]

Does anyone know the name of the guy in the red and white shirt? He is so awesome.

[SculptedThoughts]

"I can't fuck you, my tears will lose their value."

[SamuraiM0]

Ghost magic!

[bumbumchickeh]

lol, and 9/11 was a natural disaster?

[adjhd1]

please make more videos like this.

[disengagejam]

ALL HAIL XENU ... Lord of the Idiots !!!! XD

[weirdofromhalo]

On the original video, it says these things:

9/11=Natural Disaster

20 pound rations of ice!!!!!

Mind=BLOWN!

[cloudbusterman]

Inspect the temptation cult using Matthew 4.1-12 and its soft values of: Rule-of-law and peace (Trojan Cybele) Only using examples (Terra Mater) Freedom (Prince Liber) The virtues (heavenless Titans) Mammon/Pluto, Safety (Titan Rhea, Trojan Cybele) Mysticism (Idean Cybele) Stigma of Cronus (downsizing Heaven's testimonials) Globalization, Mother-as-sole-role Respect (Titan Opis) & character (Titan Koeos) Blind trust/obedience/positive attitude. So it's about Jesus' "Only enemy to be defeated".

[LBYoungGun]

lol my virgin tears are a delicacy on pluto

[snailmessia]

I like the spoof guy they put in there :P whoever edited this movie

[TheDukeofDan]

"I've been a scientologist for about 7600 light years now." Light years are a measurement of distance, not time. ಠ_ಠ

[EJNewbury]

@TheDukeofDan Sarcasm WIN!

[mdhookey]

The guy in plaid is my new hero.

[Alertas]

I do not remember when was the last time I saw so many people talking about something without actually saying anything!

[RonBurgundy904]

LMFAO! Redshirt guy you made life worth living this week. Bravo my friend.

[AustinPetDetective]

The comments from the guy in the red checked shirt are FUKED UP !!!!!

[b0yw0nder412]

love the guy in plaid

[flowergirl1263]

I understand why you dislike scientology you are just not mature enough to be able to improve your life, and you don't want others to be happier or more able eithor.

[joshemane]

I hope they know 9/11 wasn't a natural disaster...Tornadoes/Floods/Ts­unamis/Hurricanes/Volcanoes DO NOT EQUAL Terrorists

[Flailwielder]

@joshemane ...assuming that volcanoes AREN'T caused by terrorists.

[ArayCaramba]

"it teaches you why your heart is an alien testicle pumping space cum through your veins" :D well done, DaveoMathias

[chrisplaysdrums514]

Lol @SculptedThoughts you thought this was for real? Hahaha

[sosorre]

"how did u make my rectum start quoting garden state? cause i know ghost magic" funniest video i have seen in a while. actually made me LOL

[SculptedThoughts]

1:56 So pretty. Such a waste.

Why?

Religion. I fucking hate you.

[BroodK1ll3er]

760 light years ? Light years measure length not time and since when was 9/11 a natural disaster.

[blackashell13]

@BroodK1ll3er It's an understandebal misstake.

It's word Years that confuse people :P

[fleamarket3000]

dude you are funny

[wealthmaster71]

‘All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing’

We are anonymous

We are legion

We do not forget

We do not forgive

Expect us

..bitches

[mrghetto69]

what the hell... only reason i looked up Scientology was cause i saw it on south park.. i thought they were joking about these people but what the hell, and seeing that guy say he's a reincarnation of a wolf is bullshit he's more like a reincarnation of a douche, but i guess everyone's entitled to there opinions so good for you douche

[fleamarket3000]

@mrghetto69 how high are you right now?

[TheOriginalNightHawk]

0:41

idk what it is about his face i just want to punch it soooo fucking hard..

lol

[holypsychopath]

I saw this video years ago and it never gets old

[Germanboy567]

SPACE CUM

[SocietyFail]

Beyond EPIC.

[legolasegb]

Ummmmmmmmm!!!! Delicious pancreases!

[iAMsoBEAST1]

0:08 He's been a scientologist for 760 light years?

[verzeda]

'This is mashed potatoes.... but their not mashed and their not potatoes... eh... ihh... its just its.....'

[Molin525]

To suggest that Scientology somehow involves Science VIA it's Namesake, is like saying Christianity involves Jesus of Nazareth. Neither the former nor the later have anything to do with the other. It is simply a matter of Humans demonstrating their need to be taken seriously, which of course by both examples only demonstrates just how foolish we all can be.

[DrZilty]

Scientology is certainly dangerous to one's wallet and mental well being, but comparing it to mainstream religion is like comparing apples with...

Some fruit that's killed a shit ton more people than apples.

[RiskyBinjuice]

wtf is goin on behind him at 2:07?



[daveygravey123456]

@RiskyBinjuice just finished anal

[sfkitkat]

@RiskyBinjuice good question - looks like some bicycle disaster

[xFlexYourHeadx]

God, Daveo is so fucking hilarious.

[jokonsiu]

at 1:11 does he says "because i know ghost badger" or "because i know ghost magic" ?? me and my roommates cant tell

[1337cole1337]

definitely magic.

[airplaneking]

Correction...I thought that was part of the video...

[airplaneking]

7600 Light years??? That is a distance you fucking moron/liar.

[xFlexYourHeadx]

@airplaneking And apparently you completely missed the fact that he was joking, and inserted his part into the ad.

[TheAthiCon]

MMMMMM.... Dolphin pancreases.

[kama2345]

Scientology???.come on...god creates us to live,to seek,to understand,to gain knowlegde,and to pray to him..have this people ever thought what is in the quran?or even in the bible?JUST THINK...Scientology,its poisoning people's mind,Thats why many community is rejecting it...Stop believing the lies,find out the truth,find out what path to take..there are two paths ways..watch torymagoo447

[uglyguido]

Hail Xenu!

[chavripper]

L Ron Hubbard was a child abuser.

Google "scientology-cult-childrens-se­curity-check"

[bonham0924]

alien testicle pumping space cum through ur body.........dude what the fuck man!!!!!!!! i cant believe i actualy heard any of this, and yet people actualy join this fucking shit!! anyone as fucked in the head as that guy in the plaid shirt should just be fucking put down for the good of the rest of the world

[GermanChocolateCake]

@bonham0924 You do realize that that was an actor interleaved into the video for satire and humor right?

Was pretty funny though.

[SandScreen]

Yeah right... They do have no idea of how to describe scientology so they don't tell you anything about it. Instead they just pick some random positive sounding adjectives and use them to describe it. Noone mentioned what they actually were beeing told.

Next time Scientology does these kind of video I would like to see some people from rehabilitation camps describing it (while running).

[twinkledryad]

that guy is funny, but without that, it's just creepy

[jdc92]

dolphin killers aswell god damn they suck

[nakfa83]

lollolol

[kotk05]

minus the funny guy segments, the commercial is vague and is like one of those work from home scams.

[anarmyoftigers420]

LMFAO!  "I was murdering dolphins with my bare hands..."

[freeradicals]

@anarmyoftigers420 I'm pretty sure he says 'bear hands'.

[DisforDubby]

omg LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

[meatisdeliciouse]

Scientology, what a bunch of dog ****. bloody IDIOTS. Scientology is only for complete social misfits with no friends and to much money. !!!!!!FAKE!!!!!!! choose Christianity, Jewdaism, Islam, Shikism or Budisim instead like NORMAL PEOPLE. Huh scientology, I **** on you. *plop plop*

[crazybassplayerdude]

dude that was fucking great

[nusucker]

He should´ve said, "Im the Bastard of Tom Cruise!"

[MalevolentHarlequin]

This was pretty good, but the guy with the buzz cut and the red and white plad shirt made this pure win.

[freeradicals]

2:06 is that a black man stealing a pregnant ladies bike?

[agrus001]

no scientologists claim to be the only ppl who really care and help ppl so it's making a joke on the guy just standing there bragging about scientology but doing nothing about a bike accident... :)

[Slettej]

what did that guy say about his lungs?????? hahahahahahahah koff koff hah kkkk haha ?????

[andyrooney11]

LMFAO!

[RadioPaul1]

Like totally amazing like wow oh my god wow I mean like o my gosh!

[merry421]

what the bucket?

[stantheman42069]

my lungs are mad of the sack of xenu lmfao

[simpsonmark]

My lungs are made of what....?

[palomechas]

they all sound like Tom Cruise

scary

[jwhiteout]

9/11 was a natural disaster, because we were scuplting poop into voodoo dolls of the Goo Goo Dolls...

[3030anon]

With all these videos of serious business, it's great to see some humor in this fight.

Laughter is the best medicine and if we forget how to laugh and enjoy ourselves, we'll be acting like the bitter, spiteful scilons.

Thank you for this awesome video.

[Taiyou42]

The guy in the red shirt is hilarious, lol.

"my lungs are made of the scrotum of Xenu"

[Seidenfuerst]

0:11

LOL

lightyears measure distance!

(and i have been an atheist for about 3,421 kilometers now!)

[MagnusRulerHardt]

What Scientologists Says About Scientology*

Btw, it is totally stupid

[jwhiteout]

:34...creepiest fucking mind-fucked sheep in all of history. Creepier than Squeaky Fromme. Wow.

You did a great thing here. Laughed more than once.

[abrllover]

and i'm doin coke, and going to raves, and im still young and learning that my virgin tears are a delicacy on pluto.

lmfao.

[Harizl]

Finally, someone else who knows Ghost-Magic.....

[MJFaves]

Creepy!

[a23673910]

ok?...it talks about poop sculpture...lungs made of balls...reincarnation of wolves...mash potatoes but it's not mash potatoes...why hearts are an alien tenticle...I bet they talk about it Literally. "ok, heres some shit...now sculp it!! sculp it!!! sculp it beautiful!!!" LOL!

Sigh~ see how they smile? ignorance is a Bliss huh?

[XENUdotNET]

omfg

[SgtMurphyMurphy]

this video is funny. it reminds me of the time i stole money from my mother's purse to pay for the booze and hookers i would be abusing over the weekend. the police found the blond one in pieces under the bridge and i still have the brunette in my cellar. actually now that i think about it this video is nothing like that.

[Majik47]

@ SgtMurphyMurphy

Oh pretty. Yet another $cieno trying to convince us everybody who is against Co$ has crimes to hide. Well, I got news for you, buddy: Nobody had more skeletons in his closet than LRH. Quite literally, sometimes.

[Majik47]

Oh sorry, did I say nobody has more skeletons in his closet? well, Miscavige does.

Lenin/Stalin => Hubbard/Miscavige. History repeats itself; the first time as tragedy, the second time as farce. Karl Marx was right, sometimes.

[troguester]

i'm not a scientologist. i was just trying to be funny and crude

[Majik47]

@logansGT :

Of course they're nice to look at. They're actors. They make a living being pretty.

Remember Ruthie Heyerdahl (watch?v=RYBXosFyFP8)? The poorly coiffed blonde who spoke out for the Scienos on YT? She turned out to be a starving actress too.

Once her cover blew, Ruthie deleted her account and tried to get rid of her own clips. Well, a lot of people thought they should stay ....

Quite funny to see how often Co$ propaganda efforts blow straight into their faces,

[Majik47]

Oh, $cienos were there to help when the Tsunami struck?

So these are the guys who tried to claim our makeshift hospital in Sri Lanka for themselves, without having lifted a finger? So these were the guys who set up billboards in the middle of the night claiming our work was theirs?

Hmmmm. Interesting.... Thanks for letting us know, folks.

[IhaveArenob]

"I quote videos I just saw on youtube for everyone to see"

↓↓↓

[nuktu]

"I have been a scientologist for 7600 light years."

[Majik47]

@nuktu

Wow. His Power Level must be WAY over 9000 :-)))

[nuktu]

It must be all those delicious pancreases!! XD

[bigjohnny12345678]

" well i started becoming a scietologist after i became ritarded and thats when it all started making sense"

[CrazzedShinobi]

hahahah mashed potatos!!!!!

rule

p.s tom cruse eats dolphin pancreases

[bluecapone]

lmfao this is the funniest vid i have seen in a long time... your heart is a alien testicle pumping space cum through your veins LMFAO!!!!!!

[logansGT]

Some of these $cilons are very attractive.....until they begin speaking.

Unfortunately, stupid isn't sexy !

[CrazzedShinobi]

omg your right!

[TheSpiderMind]

"I'm a reincarnation of a wolf that is a reincarnation of Chris Farley, and I'm a Scientologist!"

[MadisonSkeet]

Holy shit guy at 0:32 is probably the biggest dousher to ever walk this earth.

[sucramnipp]

dude...i was thinking the SAAAAME shit. hahahahahah

[Katfellow]

0:53

lol

[mgordon980]

dude, this is fucking hilariouse!

[eyg123peng]

Very funny. LMFAO. people, don't be insulted. I'm a Jew that's been called a kyke more times than I can count, and that's not funny, but this video definitely is.

[Squatch]

"It's been a long time sense anyone has called me a little tyke."

[narwhalfreedomforce]

why are you freaking out about this video? this is the parody of the original one. this is hilarious!

[eric88eric88]

they are brainwashed to say this

[macbot21]

are christians brainwashed to say they believe in an invisible man in the sky?

[EnsignN7]

Scientology's priciples are based around activities that reduce the human psyche and induce a semi-permanent hypnotic state.

Christianity, despite it being a source of many stupid things, has some credibility and isn't controlling in such a manner.

[tobyjug48]

"I've been a scientologist for 76 hundred light years"!?!??? ....... Thats distance you fuckwit

[codepinks28]

lmao. "fuckwit". that's funny.

[feuchster]

grats for pointing something out that everyone knows nothing about

[codepinks28]

i've been a scientologist for about 7600 light years. lmao.

[scorpionpaintball007]

If dogs are un-noticed near Scientologists, what can happen is unknown.

Aggresive.

They also can make good dogfood.

[darcyknox]

that was actually pretty damn fucking funny......I skuplt pooppo dolls of the goo goo dolls`` haha, I feel retarted laughing at that but I have to admit it, I did...

[Cptntasty]

"pretty much any natural disaster... you know.. 911,the tzunami..." Because there is nothing more natural than planes hitting buildings!

[PukuTheBear]

Weird too cultish, what's with the not-funny gorish sexual references. Yeah I want to be hanging out with whackos like that.

[scarotts]

...because i know ghost magic....omg epic lulz

[Bloodlovefreak]

1:35 Hot! and yes that is all I care about.

[hahayoufellover]

i know ghost magic

[fuelle]

1:49 "I was murdering dolphins with my bare hands" I lauged so hard that it hurts!

[Thr89ust]

LMFAO brilliant vid

[saxysai]

LMFAO this is BRILLIANT.

[renaphexaeon]

I want more!!!....

[gurkhaboy]

Brilliant!!!!

[roflcoppterlol]

haha, Scientology, what a fucking joke

[ccinnervisions]

LMFAOOOOOOO i totally didnt even fucking notice at first but then i heard "putting your dick" i burst out laughing

[hahayoufellover]

2.06 major bike accident

[ssimplyxllovely]

HAHA!

[ruger701]

dude in the red is the man i need to smoke an L with him one day. he has all the answers. because he knows ghost magic...the best

[lighwave]

It's like sculpting people's poop into Voo Doo dolls like the members of the Goo Goo dolls! That's it! I never thought being a Scieno could be so fun!

[LadyNinjaKagero]

My virgin tears are a delicacy on Pluto, LMFAO!!!!

This brought tears to my eyes thanks man, I never laughed so hard in my life.

[captaindebunker]

i believe we were spawned from dinosaur weewee ,and Zartan created dinosaurs,

Im a scientologist

[vidbyvid]

fuck dez peopel fuck scietoligy fuck all nerds who take this asreligions

[Tomboulding]

LMFAO!!! What a legend!!

[Armandpiecuch]

this cracked me up so much. just goes to show that scientology is just a bunch of nice sounding beliefs that sum up to nothing at all.

[pr0t0p1n0y]

"There's these mashed potatoes.... but they are not mashed. and they are not potatoes yet it jus..........."

I freaking lulled........ HARD

[andrewtheone7]

7600 light years what a nub

[lorgeyking]

i didn't know this religion was so sexual

[legolasegb]

Hilarious. I love this vid.

[HooksGambit]

The guy in the check shirt is a comedy genius. Give that man a show.

[ThiloOoOoO]

nice work buddy hahahaha i havent laughed so much in a long time...hahaha

keep it up punkink these brainwashed werwolfs ^^

greeez from germany :)

[madmentalking]

Very Funny!!!! LOL! Well done!

[sarahantoo]

does scientology really work

[manan0nim0us4]

Top of the pyramid mate. top of the pyramid.

[sarahantoo]

is that a no?

[manan0nim0us4]

it works for those at the the top...because their one and only goal is to get your money. Top of the pyramid.

[sarahantoo]

oh ok

[moomoointaco]

who knows, who cares

[sarahantoo]

i care, buddy

[codepinks28]

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[manan0nim0us4]

LOL WHAT!

Guy @ 0:10 has been a Scientologist for 76000 LIGHTYEARS? HAH AH AHAA.. SMRT! Tell that's a troll, please. ROFL

[manan0nim0us4]

LOL self pwn... nevar pause to comment.

[peeeepshow]

hahaha 911=natural disaster. A new low.

I saw these guys doing stress tests in the street on unsuspecting shoppers. I don't know how they keep a straight face. The guy at 0.40 requires assistance in my opinion.

[davidesugar]

nice language sir!

xx

[USA3333]

brainwashed cult fags

[5more]

how did you make my rectum quote garden state?

[legolasegb]

Ghost magic!

[DivertedPotential]

The seven dragons of reggae! That guy is hilarious.

[gmuncrief]

Holy Mother, that is F'in funny " I strangle Dolphins with my bare hands, for there tastey pancrias" God amazing so does that mean you are giving Xenu a blowjob everytime you breathe.

[ParanoiaToaster]

"I was murdering dolphins with my bare hands for their delicious pancreases."