Have I Got News For You Pot Noodle

[shoseki]

For thieves who like to do it from behind - Garrote Noodles

[matt876mma]

one for acne sufferers , spot noodles.

[j03h]

One for people who don't like noodles, Not Noodles

[ChocolateBar1234]

The ones you eat on a horse- Trot Noodles :).

[ProtoKun7]

Saw this when it was broadcast or thereabouts; I do believe I was in hysterics.

Also, uploaded nearly 5 years ago? Man, that was quick...

[Zed1967]

One for Catholic priests. I shagged a kiddies bot noodles.

[josh2k765]

Im eating a Pot Noodle right now. Chicken and Mushroom :')

[DazDixie666]

For Bible-readers: Lot Noodles

[avocado336]

Thecaptions for trnscribe audio are fantastic 2:15 on XD

[MrRobgregory]

one that sings opera. paul potts noodle.

[Treeis1995]

Camalot noodles

[nolsmtm]

the one when you don't get the concept of the joke, watermelon noodles

[enemaclinic]

the children's flavour.. Tot Noodles

[mrmole28]

This is the best series of puns concerning pot noodles of all time!

[StarSupernova1]

3:13

Paul: "Ah! There's the one that's annoymous..."

Jack: "What?"

Paul: "What noodles!"

Lol

[ChrisAgs88]

F**k me, It's Pot Noodles.

[roadjam]

Lollypop Lady's favourite lunch...

STOP Noodles!

[1989blewis]

Their new spaghetti product... Not Noodles

[informalmrtom]

the one you can't remember... Forgot Noodles!

[BlackFalcon269]

If you're hit by gunfire, Shot Noodles

If they've gone out of date, Rot Noodles

[zionravescene]

To be fair to Jack Dee, this WAS the best bit of the show.

[CAMM388]

One needed by hemophiliacs: clot noodles.

[AnnoyingingeXD]

Pot Noodle for dogs: Pot Poodle

[TIVAchristolly]

12 people eat snot noodles :)

[chrisrowe92]

there's a fruity one... apricot noodles

[TIVAchristolly]

@chrisrowe92 thats a fail mate not a clue

[TIVAchristolly]

@chrisrowe92  thats a fail mate, not a clue

[reaver751]

If your a cowboy in a nursery rhyme...........Yankee Doodle Noodle!

[TheWyldeFire]

Inquisitive, Got Noodles?

[EbsNhexz]

and for gangsters- Glock noodle

To keep the burglars out - Lock noodle

Out of shit puns now..thats your lot noodle

[EbsNhexz]

One for suicide bombers- Tick-Tock noodle

[MrBenjalo]

The Star Trek edition - Spock Noodles

[danthecat21]

There's one for people with amnesia;

forgot noodles.

[etocadet]

there's one from cambodia

Pol Pot Noodle

[MWragg100]

One for on the high seas:

YAUCHT NOODLES!

[NFXShockwave]

There's one by Paula Radcliffe - Squat Noodle.

[lafnlab]

From Mountain View, California: Bot Google

[wasguan]

theres the new ones for chickens.. cock a doodles

[JmanVere]

The one you see on the BBC - Have I Pot Noodles For You

[sid00745]

The one that goes stops boats dock noodles

[freethis222]

King Merton

[Shogunmiyuchan]

dis haz been going on since teh year dot noodle ^_^;

[MrBuch169169]

One you get from vending machines - slot noodles!

[apprenticemart2]

For people suffering from torsion of the testicle.............Scrot Noodles

[southsydney]

have i got stews for you

[nolsmtm]

the ones bill cosby eats, zip zop zobbity bop noodles

[nolsmtm]

rock noodles, eaten by ZZ top noodles....

[nolsmtm]

when you can't think of one, mental block noodles....

[nolsmtm]

the ones they use in brakes, stop noodles....

[timtba]

There's the one by Paul Daniels, you'll like them but not alot noodles.

[PeterannaProductions]

There's a version that you can only get by winning it in a competition: Jackpot Noodle.

[Alphacaliber]

One you put underplanes - Chock noodles.

[RoryWhyte27]

would be Paul who starts it :)

genius!

[Tarnamackle]

wah. Jack Dee's cracking up. O______O

[SnorkyO]

American noodles. Pop Tart Noodles

[hiddenbutdeadly]

noodles that explode in your mouth "pop noodles"

[ZeWarlord]

Didn't they ban one because it contained to much saturated fat? Clot Noodles?

[luceaaah]

@ZeWarlord LMAO! that made my day :')

[jamesparsons2007]

and the one you put on the feet - Sock Noodles

[truuninja1]

Have I got noodles for you.

[romtag9]

the ones for casinos: Slot noodles

[bakerstray]

the one for cambridge engineering students,

bot noodles.

[GreatWhiteBrow]

God damn it. I look at other comments to find my one's been done. Oh well. For large quantities, lot noodle.

[GreatWhiteBrow]

For car mechanics. MOT Noodles.

[zionravescene]

"There's one for babies, Cot Noodles.... oh f**k off!"

Jack Dee is a legend.

[192GreenDay]

There's the imposter...not noodles.

[romtag9]

thanks man ! was looking for this for while ! "What?" Noodles :D

[tapl500000]

There's Pot Noodle for Amnesiacs, Forgot Pot Noodles; the customer pays once, forgets he's paid, pays twice, forgets again, keeps paying and forgetting until he has no money left. You only need one Forgot Pot Noodles to make some cash.

[JFredUK]

For people who write things down in a hurry - Jot noodles

For people who like surprises - Not noodles

One for small children - Tot Noodles

[mac2552u]

when you've got acne. Spot noodles

[satansam]

Oh god I remember this when it aired. Never laughed so much!

[Nonalir]

Ah so funny! I actually couldn't breathe when Paul came out with 'F*ck me, it's Pot Noodles' I was laughing so hard! Love Paul Merton and the show in general. Always good for a laugh.

[kozzoh]

whos the guy hosting?

[simplelife88393]

@kozzoh

jack dee

[annie10103]

desperately trying to think of one.......ah well :)

[TheMrCFH]

One for motorheads - MOT noodles

[hemansx]

haha f*ck me! its pot noodles!

[InNewMusicWeTrust1]

the one to have in a casino: Slot noodles.

[dafix1972]

Drivers version - Top Pot Gear Noodles...

[0hYaar]

Third world version = got noodles?

[Chingophia]

@0hYaar hahaha fucking genius XD

[Nyanmoondrop6]

Well f*ck me it's Pot Noodle! XD

[zionravescene]

The Welsh have a point to that news story, though. They should come up with their own version: Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwy­rndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch Noodles.

[The343Player]

I personally think that HIGNFY is as funny as a kick to the nuts but ill make an exception here

[TIVAchristolly]

i put this on my facebook page. now all my friends and family are addicted to HIGNFY!

[Experiment47]

Top of the Pop Pot Noodles!

[Lexclamation]

When Paul said "Right, stop now." Jack should have said to the camera "Yes, that's your lot. Lot noodles!"

[GiantSandles]

I've never seen Jack Dee laugh so hard, lol

[Freddiewgbs]

i remember this lol i was laughing so much - swear you cut some of the end of

[cpfc1984]

Ones you order in a casino......slot noodles

[matththomas66]

One for Liverpool supporters: Kop Noodles

[JoshRobertson142]

one for raoul moat shot-noodles!

[matththomas66]

One for Star Trek lovers: Spock Noodles

[woqiri]

The guy below me sucks

[oliverbayley1]

@woqiri I thought something was distracting you.

[JoeWildthing]

There's one for detectives, Pot CLUEdles

There's one for weather reporters. Fog Noodles

There's one for perverts, Pot Nude-Lez

There's one for farmers, Pot cock-a-doodles

There's one for rappers, Hip-hop Noodles

There's one for voters, Ballot noodles

[lionelsnappi]

@JoeWildthing Ballot noodles??????????

[JoeWildthing]

@lionelsnappi idk i just made them up on the spot

[DaBigCheeseLuigi]

What about if it has spaghetti in it instead and it's called: 'Not Noodles.'

[mrbeanaswell]

I don't get the East Enders one.

[JoeWildthing]

@mrbeanaswell there's a character called dot

[mrbeanaswell]

@JoeWildthing cheers :D

[ligamentdisaster]

They've probably been done before:

One for the baby - Cot Noodles.

One for the Scottish - Pot NOOdles.

One for golfers - Putt Noodles.

One for dyslexics - Pt Noodels

[aced1592]

the 11 who don't like this don't have a sense of humour

[gww1]

The one for racists, Pot Kettle Noodles.

[hyperhayley101]

Paul Merton is a genius :D

[huangweiyin]

Oh, music on the go iPod noodles :)

[huangweiyin]

For when you're ill, Doc Noodles

For opera singers, Paul Potts Noodles

If you're Scottish, Scot Noodles

[theagent104]

For Belgian detectives. Poirot Pot Noodles!

[VicRattlehead50]

FUCK ME, IT'S A POT NOODLE! Paul Merton is a genius.

[agbagbg]

theres a fake version.. NOT NOODLES!

[TheNishido]

There's the one specially designed for the dead - Rot Noodles, and then the one for infants - Cot Noodles.

[Sabor117]

Gamblers usually go for Slot Noodles

[Niksmiss]

That was pretty funny,

[natmanprime]

you'd have to be mad to start again...CRACKPOT noodles

[thomasimon]

One with high temperature: warm noodles

[mYkeFTW]

@thomasimon wtf that just wasnt funny

[thomasimon]

@mYkeFTW I'm sorry, next time I'll first consider wether you like it before I'll say something, and I'll only comment on other people saying that something's shit.

[happynewyear0001]

@thomasimon shouldnt it be hot noodles?

[thomasimon]

@happynewyear0001 That's the joke, but it doesn't work when you read it :(

[bellshillboy83]

search for the facebook group bring back the seedy sanchez pot noodle to bring back the best flavour ever

[ugforthewin]

One for slags, cock noodles.

[themusicdr]

for those who are hard of hearing "you what noodles"

[stonehopper1067]

One made for corpe's: Rot Noodles!

[thomasimon]

Extra large version: A Lot Noodles

[RobPatterson23]

"F**k me, its Pot Noodles" ... Classic!!!

[koncorde]

If they serve them ona Russian airline, it'd be Aeroflot Noodles.

[Experiment47]

I love the way Paul says "Top of the Pop Pot Noodles", cracks me up.

[LRMMcDonnell]

if you're a gangsta... glock noodles

[dnjp4life]

What about one when you're being strangled... garrot noodles.

[DJxBash]

Paul Merson was on a rampage!! Jack Dee's weren't that good but he eventually got one with Yacht Noodle.

What do aliens eat?

Crop Noodles!!!!

Where do they buy them?

Shop Noodles!!!!

[retteretter]

One for Protoss.... zealot noodles

[bloosy]

I remember seeing this on TV.... nearly died laughing. Was watching this waiting for that last line.... :D

[Witek84]

If you're a hitman, Garotte Noodle.

[MrLazyEyes]

If it's a bit old, Rot Noodle.

[MrLazyEyes]

If you're a gambler, Slot Noodle.

[MrLazyEyes]

If you were looking for it and you just found it, Sought Noodle.

[MrLazyEyes]

For people with high blood pressure and eats too much fast food, Clot Noodle.

[Scaredbusiness]

One for Cub Scouts: Knot Noodles...

[amiablesnowman]

3:25 - stop noodles.

[Xen1aserman]

pot noodles are made in wales lol

[ECWOWNZY3A]

talking in a real language its just to anoy you looooollllll

[CiaranDUK]

There's the one you have when you're waiting for your car to be serviced... MOT Noodles :|

[mat876]

Theres one for mp's pres-cott noodles

OH  fuck off.

hahahaaa

[brown0eyed0wanderer]

Made in a modern factory: Robot Noodles

[nortsoldier]

stop noodles plz lol

[JWBails]

Theres the sex act, frot noodles

[Boozmork123]

They forgot about the one that sold at auction. Lot noodle.

[iammentallyretarded]

Hot noodles?

[NewYorkDontLoveMe]

i love it when jack dee makes a shit joke amd goes oh fuck off!

[knockoffnigel123]

Ther's one that's actually spaghetti

Not noodles!

[djlongshanks24]

pot noodles that are out of date rot noodles

[RebeccaJaneF]

other end of the alphabet...he missed the polish version...zlot-y noodles

[kisbie]

Babies are weaned on Cot Noodles. When they can walk, they move onto Tot Noodles.

[knockoffnigel123]

Theres one for Alzheimers patients.....

Forgot noodles!

[Stuurminator]

I just went to the store and bought noodles

[reelgitarzs4nubz]

There's the one that's decomposed for a few weeks.

Rot noodles.

[Zanmato007]

They advertise it like milk, Got Noodles?

[makaio07]

Haha, I think everyone should just stop noodles...

[MegaManX1415]

They have one for people who war anonymous!

What?

What noodles!

:P

[trainzandtrombones]

Or just pasta instead of noodles:

Not Noodles

[DeadWhiteButterflies]

"Well fuck me, it's Pot Noodle!"

There's one that been left in the frdige out of date: Rot Noodle.

[shaunyd1234]

The one thats decomposing... Rot Noodles

[Spinking11]

wat about the best type cream of the crop noodles

[ilovelivemusic11]

cot noodles...... o fuck off hahaha

[ScatRusty]

Title of video should be...

Have I Pot Noodles for you!

[HoneypieTheLover]

A product for artificial beings: Robot noodles!

[warrior1860]

There's the one thats full of puss: Spot Noodle!

[TheUntitled100]

One for the drug addicts - Pot Needle

[GoldentuskII]

they already did pot pot noodle

[TheUntitled100]

Well, more for heroin addicts than cannabis smokers

[mickbelfast]

chinesse and irish come together to make new one... pat noodles

Brilliant