The Rules of Acquisition

[richie8811]

so depressing...

[ChromeXk]

Awful version of a beautiful song. I know the poster didnt make the song and its nice to see the rules posted. But goddamn, synthesized pachelbels canon? Ewww

[tgbotg]

Did you make some of these up? Because I own the book Rules of Acquisition, and I know some of these aren't in there. Or perhaps non-canon sources? I know the rule "Expand or Die" was mentioned in Enterprise once as well as DS9, but given a different number. The aforementioned book hinted that the 285 rules came about gradually over time. So perhaps it was pushed back a few rules by the 24th Century. Plus you forgot Quark's rule #286: When Morn leaves, it's all over. lol

[Niydnas]

@tgbotg Some of the rules come from the non-canon books. I posted an updated version as a response to this video that has the canon rules in white and the non-canon ones in red.

[tgbotg]

@Niydnas Oh cool. Thanks!

[Makista100]

"Expand or Die" is said twice

[Niydnas]

@Makista100 That's because it's on the list twice.

[Makista100]

Expand or die is said twice

[Niydnas]

@Makista100 That's because it's on the list twice.

[iFuff]

@Richcelt His name is Pachelbel.

[yutuboslaven]

All rules have been stolen from the charter of Goldman Sachs

[dynasty11211]

you forgot rule 286: When Morn leaves, its all over.

[black2much]

112. Never have sex with the boss's sister

113. Always have sex with the boss

:D

[tgbotg]

@black2much But think about this: there are no female bosses in Ferengi society. Also, there are no female employees. Yeah, chew on that chestnut. Not sure what the rules are on Ferengi homosexuality ...

[mikero08]

This confirms my suspicion that Dick Cheney is a Ferengi.

[FallenSaintsINC]

I made a rule!

Never reveal all the Rules of Acquisition.

XD

[papercutpictures]

free advice is indeed seldom "sheap".

[Sambucacat]

To Get rich is Glorious- Deng Xaio Ping, Former Chairman of the Chinese communist party.

[Niydnas]

Any reason for posting the same quote three times?

[LittleFrenchy72]

What is the name of the song?

[Niydnas]

It's in the description.

[Richcelt]

@LittleFrenchy72 Pachabel's "Cannon in D"

[davyjones11211]

How come they skip numbers throughout the whole vid

[Niydnas]

That's all the rules that have been made public so far.

[davyjones11211]

Oh that makes sense lol

[UltimoLatino]

And the funny thing is Rule of Acquisition number 168 was actually the first one written to drive up demand for the others that came before it........so we aint gonna know all of them for a long time.

[IMBigfella]

The reason given in another video (think it was home movie taken at a convention) a Ferengi says that it is for profit. If they made all the rules available in the first volume of the book, where is the profit in that. If they skip around, when they fill them in and publish a second volume, you have to get the 2nd volume to fill in the gaps. Think like a Ferengi, it's all about profit.

[nova2384]

These rules can apply to real life we should get to know them

[Danny77uk]

Cool but 'Expand or Die' came up twice!

[Osilus2]

fucking idiots. all fucking idiots. good grief.

[Mxlsptlk]

Idiocy, you call this idiocy!? This is a great tool for dealing with consumers and clients, as well as a way to parody a consumer coulture out of control that could use an injection of morals and common human decency. (It's quite sad that this system actually works. Business itself, I guess, could use a bit of scrutiny.)

[eldoradoreefgold]

i've lusted for this knowledge for years after the show ended!!i now know even ferengi can be terrible spellers!!!lable=label/succule­nt=succlent/then=than/and so forth!!what is most disturbing is that this is not the complete "rules of acquisiton" there are gaps and missing rules....dozens.....argh@@!!!

[westfalla]

Even the most complete list has gaps, not all of the rules have been released.

[Mxlsptlk]

I actually knew a girl in highschool that had a bound copy of The Rules of Acquisition. I should have married her. C'est la vie.

[Niydnas]

Knowing absolutely nothing else about her; yes you should have.

[rosenrotNL]

rule 192 is the best: Never cheat a klingon unless you know you can get away with it

[JayEey]

Free advice is seldom sheep! lol

[Just2BeWithHer]

awsome !!!!!!!!!

[Sambucacat]

To Get rich is Glorious- Deng Xaio Ping, Former Chairman of the Chinese communist party, he also looked VERY Frengi.

[YTMrVulcan]

I like the intention, but I see any number of grammar/spelling mistakes.

[Niydnas]

You see ANY number of mistakes? I doubt that. You probably only see one number. I know there are some spelling mistakes but the number is finite and unchanging. As for the grammar mistakes; many are due to the fact that windows movie maker limits the number of characters allowed for each line so some editing was needed.

[YTMrVulcan]

As for the "ANY number...", I think you took me a little to literally. If space was an issue, then why not begin the text on the same line as the number. Also, at least one of the mistakes I found actually cost you space, rather than saving it. Oh, never mind all that! It's still nice! :)

[Niydnas]

What you don't like it when people point out your grammar mistakes? :)

[YTMrVulcan]

Of course not. That would be illogical. :)

[bluerisk]

Or it is Ferengi rule 286: Never waste your precious time with useless things like grammar or spelling.

Blame the Ferengis!

[googlegru]

rule 22 shouldn't it be a wise FERENGI not man

[Niydnas]

No it shouldn't. This is Star Trek not Lord of the Rings.

[bluerisk]

A wise man is always a man, a wise Ferengi however could also be a female Ferengi - a no-go.

[Niydnas]

Ferengi women are not allowed to wear clothes, leave the house, read or ear profit. So Ferengi talking about the rules of business are implicitly talking about males.

[davyjones11211]

Ferengi women can leave the house just not the planet.

[altha2008]

the ruels numbers of different then other list of the rules of acquisituion

[altha2008]

rule number 284 everyone is indeed a greedy little ferengi espically conservaitves

[SulliMike241]

My favorite rule is rule 214, Never begin a negotiation on an empty stomach.

Rule number 284 is true about humanity. Deep down, everyone is indeed, a greedy little Ferengi.

[trimi38]

feregngi math time!

Question 1. opitunty + instinct = urrrm 48?

lol

[paigelore]

never forget the most important rule of accquistion. the unwritten rule, "when no rule exists for an existing situation... make one up!" the ferengi used it in voyager :)

[Sambucacat]

note to self 1) get BS in commerce or open Etrade account. 2)learn these rules 3)invest in Gold Pressed Latinum 4)buy Bentley, wear a top hat, and call myself Lord Conrad Black!..... OR watch Wall Street staring Charlie Sheen. 5)Vote for Conservative Party of Canada.

To Get rich is Glorious- Deng Xaio Ping, Former Chairman of the Chinese communist party.

[sch4tj3]

you forgot: When Morn leaves, it's all over! from house of Quark ;) My favorite rule next to No. 31! tnQ for puting this on youtube

[rockgollem]

There's a quote that comes out twice, actuallythe one about expand or die

[Niydnas]

If you really knew your rules you'd know Expand or Die has been listed as both the 45th and 95th rules.

[ShokoDemon]

briliant!

[BrandonNyte]

::laughs and claps his hands:: That's awesome!  How incredibly perfect.

[ZionNeo1]

What an Ego-filled race, they have no heart or spirituality. They are materialistic.

[LordCerneAbbas]

How Amerikkkan of them. So very KKKristian indeed.

[ductonius]

They have plenty of spirituality, just look in their wallets.

[Squirrel36]

I think it is very nice, Niydnas.....

[Niydnas]

Thanks.

[Squirrel36]

You're welcome...........

[ers586]

Thanks for posting this!

[Niydnas]

Welcome :)