Does Not Compute - White People Rapping About Rape: What Could Go Wrong?

[WhoElseButKris]

3:25-3:56 was the illest shit I ever heard.

[CaiusTheChaosPhantom]

lucky dog

[Vitance]

Am I the only one who finds Hannah a little...disturbingly ugly?

I watch Japanese TV every day, and the fact that she can barely manage to pronounce her own language, let alone Japanese, only makes her more annoying.

Not to mention she makes all Japanese learners look like weaboos. I'll admit I love anime, but damn...猫耳? まじで？

[tornadomaster96]

@Vitance I don't think you're supposed to be looking at her face or paying attention to what she's saying

[InstantEnergy65000]

@Vitance Ugly, no... Wapanese? Possibly.

[TheOtakuologist]

@UGBabyc4ke, nah, I watch Hannah for the same reason you do. I have RosettaStone for Japanese language training.

[wkdandwild]

Love it :)

[TheMagmagoblin]

Can anyone tell me who did the song that closes the show? "Mind Games"?

[blackkakari]

See, the problem with most rapists is they forget to yell "Surprise!" before they rape. Everyone loves surprises! : D

[angeltroea]

even the title of this made me laugh

[RH98]

Wow... Does that girl ever get beyond "Mizu means water"? Still, at least I am not gonna forget that in a hurry. In Japanese water is called... boobs. Oh shit. Mental wires crossed there. Back to the classroom for me.

[tornadomaster96]

RAPE IS WRONG (you people better give me lots of thumbs up)

[TheSuperDerp]

I've been your boobs, Micheal Boobs. Allow me to boobs your tits.

[yannbane]

Why isn't this more popular? It's pure awesomeness!

[boredboy1993]

I get it because boobs, in cracked articles, are hidden by owls XDXDXDXDXD

[hessrockman]

@boredboy1993 i get it because a slang term for boobs is "hooters"

[boredboy1993]

@hessrockman Awww man thats awesome, i like the way you think

[fuckweed]

watch?v=AmZvj7X8KSk

[Yarxov]

What was SWAIM thinking about?..

[eamond619]

@Yarxov guess

[JDLupus]

Feck for a moment there I thought John Cleese helped with the research.

[halfmanhalfmetal]

Rap dancers. Full body mullet. Rap is the only musical genre with a pro rape stance.

Dear God, this video metafunny.

[halfmanhalfmetal]

I love Swaim. He's like a heterosexual version of Joel McHale.

[TripleDimensional]

@halfmanhalfmetal

1) You are awesome for loving Rooster Teeth.

2) Joel McHale is baws.

3) He actually is hetero. Soooooooooo, yeah.

4) Have a good one!

[tvlover17]

Its funny cuz in reality swaim is a really good rapper

[TheOtakuologist]

It's MIZU dammit! Not Meat-zu!

[princesstamika]

@TheOtakuologist Actually Michael is right, in Japanese (and many other languages) the romanization is only an approximation of the actual sound. In Japanese the "z" sound is actually half way between the "s" and "tsu" sounds. Similarly, in Cantonese the "z" is half way between the "d" and "j" sounds. ...somehow. In other words, the true sounds of their words cannot be completely equated to our own.

[shinfukukristi]

@princesstamika Actually... mizu is exactly how it is spelled in English. The Z is a Z. it really is Mizu.

[princesstamika]

@shinfukukristi Yeah I know, I'm talking about the pronunciation.

[TheOtakuologist]

@princesstamika I wasn't talking about the spelling, I was talking about Swaim's pronunciation of the word.

[TheOtakuologist]

@princesstamika sorry, I misunderstood your comment, but I still have to disagree. The word for "water" in Japanese hiragana is みず. The sound for "ず" is "z." not a cross between "s" and "tsu." Even if it was, the sound is closer to "z" than "tsu." Listen to the way Hannah says it and then listen to the way Michael says it. You'll hear the difference.

[UGBabyc4ke]

@TheOtakuologist So you're watching Hannah to learn japanese..?

I sure fer one don't

[Bigkahkistan]

@TheOtakuologist damn, you just got called out. some otaku you are.

[TheOtakuologist]

@Bigkahkistan Or rather I'd have been called out if I was wrong, but I'm not.

[Choomanama]

The presenter of that show's name is Gay. I just thought you all should know that. Also He could have been Ireland's president .True story. Everybody in Ireland wants to kill him.I mean that. also please Swaim, Never EVER do an Irish accent again.You actually sounded more like a Mexican.

[shittyfagg]

@Choomanama was that irish? here i was thinking he was just making it up as he went along. You know, post-haste.

[IamAlastair]

@Choomanama naw, im gonna say that sounded more irish than mexican

[xel99]

i lol'd at the ending, good stuff.

[gxtmfa]

2:20 she is doing the Carlton dance from fresh prince

[xXxXInspireMeXxXx]

the rap is really funny and a bit unfourtunate, but it's overall for a good cause

[shittyfagg]

Hey Michael, I like your show and I don't know anyone that doesn't.

[sharky0922]

im your boob michael boob allow me boobs your tits

jesus swain..no..you are a jesus,

god of comedy

[MousAnony778878]

5 people think rape is right

[rockslideproductions]

Ironically, you actually said "mizu" wrong.

[iamthatold]

gay byrne

[jeanrn]

just rewatched it after some months and it's still my fave DNC. also, hey, that's the same flame shirt Swaim's donning in the latest Agents of Cracked episode! and another also, i love him

[MasterADG1]

Oh, owls. I get it...Hehe.

[Kitiem3000]

You definitely made me a fan of Japanese word of the day!

[TwigDjango]

I only just discovered this show now. Please keep it going; it's great!

[Hufflepuffish]

HAHAAH switchfoot reference!

[ApatheticUltimatum]

"It's not going well but you goooootta dance" is rapped somewhere in every gig my friend's band plays. I'm sorry. I think we officially owe you money.

[Vajrayana514]

This video taught me how to use the word "perambulate". Also, boobs.

[mythman30]

what song is that at the end?

[GerardoArwi57]

Wait, does "Does Not Compute" ends?

Why is everyone miss it, when it's still going?

[BonesxtoxPaste]

@GerardoArwi57 No idea, it just stopped after the 7th episode. If he's going to finish it up after Agents of Cracked, shove in time between After Hours, or just say "fuck them all".. Only time will tell.

[joeydivision92]

@BonesxtoxPaste He's carrying on with it after Agents of Cracked ends, I think.

[psofan2000]

I still love it, sexy ;)

and I'm a man! :D

[kristigo203]

DNC is so good...

do not stop

[esotericLantzer]

Only 3,689 watches? Something is terribly wrong here.

[MetalMatt93]

@esotericLantzer You call views, "watches"? Something is terribly wrong here.

[gatorboymike]

My tits have been boobsed artfully, good sir.

[MajorRoy]

booooobs, wut?

[FMWCelt]

Swaim, an early 90s episode of Irish chat show the Late Late show with Gay Byrne and Hannah Minx

As an Irish man who's a fan of Swaim and big tits my heart almost exploded.

[Maranda22]

:( I miss does not compute.

[graceman25]

I normally find what you do very funny. But seeing that incredible girl and hearing the word rape kind of made me feel sad.



[kbmuncher]

RAPE IS WRONG!

[flyvid]

Swaim is a god!

[DrCool8]

Swaim, you rap like Colin Mochrie... Thats a good thing

[YuiYamana]

that chick looks like Elvira

[thech0p]

whats up with cracked? why are they reloading everything?

[AndiKeepSmile]

Jaysus Gay Byrne won't like this! He's going to make us watch more RSA ads to punish us >_< Feck sake! :P

[Cathan01]

That's the Gay Byrne you're slagging off. The Gay Byrne!

[noodleguru]

I'd do coke with Swaim in a minute.

[DevoutPatriot]

How does he keep from laughing?!?

[petrov32]

This made my day!

[Raggadouche]

That shit was off the hook

[redbeard6666]

Am i the only one who's seen this video before? Like before today?

[yoshigotgun]

ive never seen a video with this many likes and NO dislikes!

[ShtikMahn]

Dear god. Tell me you people are watching this in 1911's mode.

[HotTequilaBr0wn]

Why is it so hard to give this guy a $50 million deal? Hey, thanks for discovering Minx for me! I'm off to watch that rack now...

[slobberinsammy]

"I still have a rack" - Minx

"O I haven't forgotten" - Swaim

Neither have we swaim, neither have we...

[Mustkunstn1k]

My god... Swaim. Do more of these! After Hours is pretty interesting, but nowhere near as funny as these.

[KmOj]

I miss cracked TV =(

[TheKayasto]

when can i dl your rap song Mr. Swaim? best rap ive ever heard, 1st time ive ever liked rap as well

[TheKayasto]

"im in my kitch an i got some (japanese word for water)" BITCH!! YOU BETTER BE GETTING ME A SAMICH D:<!!!!!!

[TheArmandoRomeroShow]

Dam O.O

[CooperLordOfAll]

lol so perfect with the 1911 button

[DevanLund]

I love how he does such a horrible rap in this video, but if you look at Swaim's own YouTube channel, he is a very talented rapper.

[OdinLowe]

I'm sure I've seen this before...

[Thanetos11]

This show still exsists?

[CalculusKid]

Mitsu means "three objects", which can't be right 'cuz I only noticed two things in this video.

[SolidGoldKalashnikov]

this video got me Business Drunk

[OtterpopSlaughterMop]

You like Minxy, eh? Well, I've got the Minxy nudes. So does Soren. And we're both gonna take you down. OK, as long as Colt 45 remains at a less than reasonable price you have nothing to worry about from me. But watch out for Soren. Zero accountability my ass, he's after your job, Swaim. 

[OtterpopSlaughterMop]

@OtterpopSlaughterMop I meant to say "more than reasonable" in regard to Colt 45. But fuck it! Billy Dee is still on the label and that makes me smoother than anyone who would comment on my little fuck up.

[DrDreamPop]

it's mizu not mitsu, faggot. just playin, love this show.

[heathen18]

WHY ARE THERE NOT NEW DNC???

[Spo8]

Does Not Compute/Cracked TV are among my favorite videos of all time.

SWAIM, you are a god among mere children.

[Mustkunstn1k]

@Spo8 Same for me. I downloaded to my PC :D

[SerialNoYM63]

Cracked is the best!!!

[FatTonyBBX]

I miss Swaim's videos. He definitely needs to make more.

-FT

[Monkeyboy92037]

i need more swaim right now, no homo

[rcon1012]

i miss DNC.

also, has swaim ever tried to use the pun swaimingly in conversation? like, "my plan went swaimingly"

fuck that isn't very good.

I'm drunk.

[JesterAzazel]

@rcon1012

Well, as long as you're drunk then it was fine. But just to be safe, you should follow up with "rape is wrong".

[rcon1012]

@JesterAzazel or is that just what they want you to think?

[STMUN]

Swaim should drop a single



[ummwut]

What happened to DNC?

[maximus440]

i banged dan obrien once..and im a guy

[hellobluemonday]

yep