@MartinXNewton (cont.) But like i said i respect your response and your preference. we all have them. I just know to be who I am and not conform to what the latest fad of desire is and thats for BM, WM, or whatever race man. And no we aren't supposed to disregard who we care for b/c of their hue or race. But we shouldn't do the opposite either and disregard entire races or hues or ppl due to categorizing, and sterotyping. Truth is you can fall for anyone.
@MartinXNewton. Ok I can respect what your response to my reply was. All i'm saying is i've just been observing (especially as of late) some BM saying that BW are hard to deal with and it always goes to BW have this whole "Im an independent woman, i dont need a man blah blah crap" but if we aren't on that tip we get called golddiggers. Then its like BM say they want a strong woman but if some meet a strong BW she's difficult, a strong WW is "fiesty". Like i get confused at what it wanted lol.
Some BM will only date light skinned women and Some will only date dark skinned women, BUT a majority of them will go after either of them. HOWEVER, the bias that I have observed more often is BW saying they will not date light skinned BM. Being a light skinned BM I have been rejected for that reason. women that was blue I'd probably dig her too.
Just like u guys dont want to be categorized, generalized, blamed, or put down, NEITHER DO WE! Its starting to grow old and sound like BM are whining. Its like "oh we date WW cuz BW are too hard to deal with. We want to be supported. We want to be treated like a king, etc,"Some of us do these things but a lot of BM are to jaded by their own mess of peer pressure, social standards, etc. to see the good ones. Everything's not easy BM, man up. And i love my BM, its just becoming redundant.
The BM you speak of have self-esteem issues. I date A wWoman, not wWOMEN. To date someone bc of their race or skin tone is shallow and defeats the essence of LOVE. If someone makes you happy, should you abandon your feelings due to the hue of their skin? There are actually times when I forget my woman is white and when it finally hits me I'm like "Holy Shit, you're white". All BW aren't hard to deal with, but strong women of any race are uncontrollable...but I love feisty woman.
No offense but you can't speak on behalf of the WHOLE black male population. So lets not once again put the BW down as the one perpetuating this nonsense. We have enough of criticisms without being blamed for this. Its funny too b/c the guys i've observed (notice the way that's phrased so i'm not generalizing or speaking on behalf of others) always say the same thing "I'm tired of BW sayin BM aint this or that. we're not all the same". Well why can't u guys see we aren't all the same either.
i agree 100% if anything i've seen waaay more black women who are color struck than black men waaay more look at the amount of sista's rockin blond weave blue contacts,calling themselves barbies look at the amount of sista's dating dudes cause the have good hair or they light skinned and will make a cute baby.how many sista's do you know that judge they self worth by white peoples beauty standards? how many sistahs do you know rock the natural look?how many show love 2 us brotha's vs negativity?
No, that is called having the Michael Jackson syndrome. However, the overwhelming majority prefer their own BM and their is a split in what skin tones they like--some like light skin, many like dark skin, but their is a lot of us that don't care. On the other hand, their is a clear distinct pattern of BM overwhelmingly going for light skin women. That's no secret. But the overwhelming majority of BM prefer BW. So, there you go.
@everagej get the fuck outta here it's self hatred period point blank.before you preach to me do me a favor cause the ironic part is that a white dude brought this to my attention.look at the overwhelming amount of black women down black men on you tube in favor for white guys look interracial dating on here there's a massive amount of sistahs switching over you go back and fourth with me all you want but look at the countless videos of black women putting down brothers and promoting that shit
Yes, the Michael Jackson syndrome is self-hatred. Of course it is, you are right on the money about that. Also, I do see the videos of BW promoting the IR videos. You are right about that. But you have to admit, that it is very true that BM overwhelmingly go for light skin when it comes to their preference. BW it is more split. Also, BW have a lower percentage of dating and marrying outside of their race vs. BM--these are backed by stats. But, yes, all of it is the same.
@everagej do you know how many brothers feel what i feel?i just need a strong sister by my side who's committed,i don't care about skin tone at all honestly, part of the reason i have no kids and i'm in my early 30's is cause i don't want drama or the chick that has 40 different guy friends she hangs out with i don't want a baby mama i need a wife a solid relationship is enough but sisters come with negative vibe sometimes that brings the worst out of us yet the don't do it to other races
Yes they do. A fool is a fool no matter with whom they are mated. I have heard of stories of BW Bossing their White husbands or boyfriends and causing drama with other gruops of men. You don't want those BW anyway. They are clowns.
Yeah, it's hard because our whole generation is screwed up. The majority of us don't have any damn sense. However, I am seeing a strong emerging of young adults like us who are reclaiming our MINDS as BM and BW and trying to build something.
Oh yes, I know many brothers who think like you--very positive and ain't on the dumb stuff. That's who I seal with. Tha'ts why I am single, not b/c I can't find someone to date, but so many BM our not liberated--no knowledge of self and no self love. Low self esteem, depression, a feeling of unworthiness, DEFEATED. You can see it in their eyes, posture, dress, hear it in how they speak and see it from what they do. It's sad.
BM really don't need to be chastised and put down. They need to be loved to greatness. They need kind words, respect, and encouragement. If there is a disrespectful brother it's better to let him be and just keep it moving. But a lot of BM don't get the affirmation, support, encouragement, and love that they need to live a life of victory. BM need to first look in that mirror and start loving self, and form better relations with each other, and deal with supportive BW.
Dude, you sound soo dumb. What do you think color struck is? That was not started just by a dark skinned chick--remember your skin type for a long time was considered ugly too for a BM. When you choose a peron on SKIN COLOR THEN YOU ARE COLOR STRUCK. That is technically what the term means. Also, stop THE B.S. that it is a preference. You should be more educated on the FACT THAT THE PROMOTION OF LIGHT SKIN IN OUR COMMUNITY HAS ITS ORIGINS IN WHITE RACISM AND OUR INTERNALIZATION OF IT!
I am a good deep cinnamon brown Black Woman!! Lol! And yes I had to go there with the Brotha. I don't think he is dumb, I think he is in denial. I said he sounds dumb, but of course he is not dumb. I am just a realist. I am young and dating, I know what goes on and I know the politics of dating. I know the B.S. that a lot of us as BM and BW are on. BM are not the only contributors of problems in our relationships; BW are equally problematic--we dog each other.
Hell yea. Black women are selfish dumb azz self-hating sellout white man's whores who hate dark skin and real dark/brown-skinned black men, that's why we're is in deep shit. black women think that racist fake white people are their friends and their racist white "kings" men for real in love with them...smh!
I cant speak for most black men but the ones I lived around are...sorry to say. I lived around bm my whole life..including my father talked about lightskin women and long hair..lol. The process to healing is admitting that they have an issue. I really hate it when people call it preference when we know the real deal.
Color struck is the biggest BS I have ever heard. I would give up my left nut to hook up and go out on a date with Helena Andrews who's dark skinned and would run like hell away from Spicee Cajun who's light skinned. Search for these names in ytube and you'll see what I'm talking about. I assure you sistas out there, for most brathas, skin tone ain't got nothing to do with female choices, it's everything else.
maybe ive been hiding under a rock or something but i really dnt know any "females" who think on tht level...thank god!!! one thing we must remember is tht you cant please everyone. attraction is very important and if you are not attracted to tht person (no matter wht the skin tone) you should just leave tht person alone and seek wht your heart really desires. in doing tht, you can keep dwn alot of confusion.
i agree with you! when a man isn't attracted to certain complexion of black lady; he should EASILY say: you're not my type (he shouldn't get nasty about her complexion b/c that is rude & immature). i used to think "light skin men disrespect dark skin women, expecting sex in 2 wks" b/c i was getting disrespected by light skin men with them asking for sex in 2 wks w/o taking me on a date; of course i didn't have sex with them & they immediately disappeared... then i noticed COMPLEXION
I went through phases as a teenager, at first the girl had to be "chocolate" on some "blacker the berry sweeter the juice" type shit. Then I had a summer of scoopin' up "redbones" all the light skinned chicks. When I grew up I realized it really don't matter what complexion they are as long as they are sincere & love the hell out of you. Black men aren't color-struck at all. The Sistaz might see it different lol. Thx for another great vid Bruh...
That's a lie, there are plenty of BM who make it clear they only date certain kind of women with a certain kind of complexion. You know that, stop lying. Color struck is not a separate definition from having a preference for a specific skin color--IT MEANS THE SAME DAMN THING!!! It is interchangeable. The video was not great, it was dumb as hell.
@everagej Being "color struck" implies that a particular color is all your desire which is racist, I don't know ANY Black men like that. To have a preference just means 1rst on your "to-do" list but you'll date anyone no matter the color. I don't have to lie about anything everagej. Too bad you didn't enjoy the vid, I did.
What I am saying. What you are describing as a prefence does indeed fit the definition of colorstruck. You are simply describing a degree or level of how one can be color struck. USING A SKIN COLOR AS A FACTOR TO DETERMINE WHAT IS ATTRACTIVE IS CONSIDERED BEING COLORSTRUCK. Regardless to whether or not it is strong or weak. You are confusing the degree or level of color struck vs. the actual definition.
@everagej Disagreed. If I have had relationships with various shades/races of women in my life then I can make a logical assessment on the shade of women I found most desirable through experience, making my unbiased choice a preference. I don't have the restrictions, limitations or lack of choices of being "colorstruck". There is no level or degree with me people are people. My preference is Sistaz so how do you define that?
If you are African-American or of African descent I would say you are acting naturally and healthy to deal with your own. Dealing with self and kind. If you live in a color struck, racist, White supremacist society that promotes light skin and whiteness 24/7 you are bound to experience a certain psychological effect from it. People of African descent are in denial of that reality and don't want to acknowledge.
@everagej The Blacker the berry lol, I feel u. I ain't mean to get off on the wrong foot with you Bruh. I fight against the mental hangups we have as a people and it good to see another Brotha "giving a fukk" even if we bump heads on minor issues. I ain't perfect either so I'm not trying to come off like I know it all but I can def relate...
You know, it's funny. Other men always think they are talking to a man when I post. LOL!! You are not the first. I just find that interesting. Also, thank you for recognizing that I am simply having a healthy debate vs. attacking you personally. It's all good. We all have a difference of opinion. I just love Black people--ALL Black people we ALL look good. Nothing that we reproduce as long as it is healthy is unattractive or undesirable.
I like the variety we produce. It is soo exciting and amazing to look at. I think we forget how beautiful, awesome, and exotic that we look. We are mind boggling. I like to see the striking differences in our appearances. We are a walking, living, breathing mosaic. I preference nothing, b/c when I have children--they all going to come out as a mosiac of colors and features--how can I possibly choose which is better than the other?
If you prefer Black women I would say you have freed yourself of that particular form of PTSS--Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome or that particular form of internalized racism. Like I said, nothing produced from the loins of a BM and a BW, regardless of skin tone and features, is inferior ugly or undesirable b/c it comes from self and kind--my ethinic group. All of it is good. No Black person makes decisions free from the influence of White Supremacy.
@everagej Yessir but more minds need to be freed as well, we got a helluva lot of work ahead of us but if we focus on the next generation it will speed up the healing process over the next few decades.
100% agreed. We need to work with the babies. I tell you--Black people need to pull their children out of these schools where their is nothing but White teachers who don't give a damn about them and aren't teaching them anything and they wonder why I children are failing. Also, having a Black owned school is not enough when you following the same failure program. Black schools, ran by conscious Black folks and lovingly and properly teaching our children.
You make a conscious decision to love self and kind and to choose based on that foundation. You are constantly battling pro-White propaganda in the Western world. We are force feed their beauty standards, their standards of manhood and womanhood--it is not of our creation and too many of us accept it w/o question--and we make decisions on our partners based on their paradigm. That's reality. Only a few of us actually take a break and think and go against the SQ.
One thing we can agree upon. You are 100% correct that I personally think that regardless of color preference the overwhelming majority of BM will choose a pretty face and a nice body over skin color any day. However, I do know men who have strictly stayed with dating a particular skin color. They do exist.
BM are not color-struck, "attractiveness" trumps skin-color and BW fail to realize that.
Ex:You can meet a brotha who is into "light-skin" sistas and y'all decide to go to club right? So, in the club he peeps like 3 pretty dark-skin sistas and maybe a average light-skin sista. 9 times out of 10 he is going after one of those pretty dark-skin sistas in the group.
Attraction(and body type) is a major factor in what a BM is looking for and that can tip the scales for a BM's preference.
@theadviseshow Nah Disagree. BM are indeed color struck I see a recurring theme throughout your vids. Jsut because you deny something, doesnt make it disappear.
Black men just like many BW are color struck. When you are using that as part of or as primary in your selection of a mate--you are stuck on skin tone. That is what the defintion technically means. Also, when I find out a BM is colorstruck I cut the dummy loose b/c apparently he is still dealing with a serious anti-Black inferiority complex. Nothing that what a BM or BW produces whether it is light or dark is inferior or more or less attractive it is all damn good.
@everagej If you don't factor in attraction, I don't don't see how your argument will hold up. Facial features and body type are major factors in attraction. The reason blk people look at skin color as being the major indicator for attraction is because media images. Men in general are visual creatures and body types are a major factor for men.
Black women (mainly dark-skin) are more angry and harden about this topic. Keep in mind, the Lil Wayne's and Chad Johnson's cont.
do not represent the mindset of MAJORITY of black men. Black men are stereotyped as being "oversexed" (thirsty,lol) meaning that we will hit on any type of woman. How can we be "oversexed" and "color-struck" at the same time??.........hmmmm? That does not make sense, because color-struck falls in the lines of preference.
Now, when it comes to image, color-struck plays a factor. (ex. Jack and Jill paper bag test) Upper political and social groups like these are imbedded with cont.
this ideal. Realistically, most blk people don't look like Boris Kodjoe and Hallie Berry so blk men in general can not afford to be that picky. A black man WILL put preference aside over skin color if she has the right body type and cute face.
I don't deny color-struck people exist, but what I'm saying from a dating point of view, a blk men's desire to get a woman he will over look his personal preference.
@gallyun1 Also, I personally wouldn't want to deal with a BM with a skin tone preference. Why? I don't ever want to know I am considered "second rate" and that attitude will pop up--how he talks to you and treats you. Also, I don't want to have a bad sexual experience with a brother b/c he cannot perform very well in the bedroom b/c I am not his preference. That stuff happens, ok.
Look, I don't want to be the one the BM "settled" with --my skin color should not be "overlooked"--it is a part of who I am and what makes me beautiful to me. If he doesn't like it--he can keep it moving. I hate to date BM who are all in your face, trying to date you, only in the end he is color struck and you are not it but wants to be in your damn face and get in between your legs--get the hell on with that.
I interpret BM who do that kind of mess is basically stating through his words and actions that I am a toilet to relive himself in and not good enough to be his woman or wife. I am not Celie from the Color Purple, get your light skinned dream or White girl dream and stop cock blocking. I deal with Black men who prefer BW and love BW period regardless of skin tone. That's my preference.
@everagej What are you talking about?? Who said you were Celie??? Why are you assuming I like like skin women???(this is not a healthy debate) Where are you getting all this??? Like I said before, you are not thinking outside box and your venting.
I am talking in general, I am not talking about you personally. Where are you getting I am addressing you personally. I am talking about a BM who may think like that, not you, I never said you. Point out to me when I have said anything about you personally?
My argument holds up b/c I have personally met BM who have dated nothing but White or/and or light skinned BW. Only a very few of them actually dated a dark skinned woman and that would be one or two times--I don't consider that being equal opportunity. Also, I know of BM who have dogged the features of dark skinned women, period and in the same breath uphold the image or have dated light skinned women or non-Black women who were clearly plain, unattractive, overweight...
Bad teeth, dirty hair, to skinny or too fat, etc...There is a website dedicated to Black men and White women where the black men admit to exclusively dating and seeking to date or marry WW. Many BM, refuse to date either BW or dark skinned BW b/c the skin color is the most important and the only factor--it is the deciding factor. Many BM confess to not even being able to perform properly sexually if they are not with a woman who is either light skinned or white.
Fully aware of that. They on some dumb sh*t as well. I don't support them either. They suffering from PTSS. Let me put my viewpoint in this way. I am a BW. I love being Black, I love Black people, I love the features of Black people--in all of its variety. I don't suffer from an inferiority complex, meaning that I don't think that anything that a BW or a BM reproduces from their loins--as long as it is healthy is undesirable, unhealthy, ugly, not as attractive, etc..
Also, is it any suprise that dark skinned women are more angry and harden. They have a right to be. They have been disrespected long enough. I may not have control over who you like and who you date, but dammit show me respect. There is no need to publicly ridicule dark skinned women, blast your so called preferences in public, and degrade dark skin women, make snide and cruel remarks about BW with dark skin tones, etc...
Also, if it is a personal preference it needs to be kept to oneself. Treat others the way you would want to be treated. If stupid Black folks weren't so quick to verbalize their B.S. and mistreat other Blacks based on skin color--this conversation wouldn't even be going on. People are projecting their f**kedupness on their family, friends, peers, children, lovers, co-workers, etc... No one wants to hear that sh*t. Keep your so called preferences to yourself and keep it moving.
@everagej Your venting.............. which is cool, but you are still missing my point. There deeper dynamics to people's attraction besides being color-struck. You have one side that is about preference and and one side is self-hate.
Also keep in mind your viewpoint does not represent the majority (think outside the box)
and I not your enemy, there is not need for to say "keep it moving".
Also, I didn't say you need to keep it moving. What I meant was for people who want to verbally blast their damn preferences and mistreat those who don't fit their so called preferences can keep it moving. Also, I am not venting, I just call out B.S. And disgusing internalized racism and self-hate into 'PREFERENCES' is some damn B.S. I call it like I see it even if it comes off harsh.
And your viewpoint doesn't represent the majority either. Why don't you think outside of your box. Look I know the difference between preference and self-hate. I think it is you that has a problem dealing with the reality that Black people have a serious case of PTSS--Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome; Internalized Racism, Internalized Oppression. The obsession with skin color and features was and continues to be fueld by WHITE RACISM. End of story.
I am not attacking you. I never accused you of having any skin color preference. I am talking about BM who think a certain way. I am not referring to you. Also, I am not venting, I am being real. My apologies if you thought otherwise.
We have a choice to date or pursue whoever we choose. Darker black women just aren't happy in their skin and cant accept people have their own preference.
No, what it is we are tired of dummy's like you who think it is o.k. to get in a public sphere and in our face and have the damn nerve to tell us that we are NOT IT! AND WE NEED TO STEP BACK! It's disrespectful and it's childish and cruel to make it a point to put someone down and try to make them feel like crap b/c they don't have the hue you so call prefer. Also, it is ignorant and internalization of White Supremacy to think light skin is more highly attractive.
Black men are color struck always have been always will be
TheJenn5454 2 days ago
listen ... speak for yourself.... some folk is color stroked ... and some aint... how u being 1 person gon speak for 10,000000 others.... silly
jadenwoods11 1 month ago
@MartinXNewton (cont.) But like i said i respect your response and your preference. we all have them. I just know to be who I am and not conform to what the latest fad of desire is and thats for BM, WM, or whatever race man. And no we aren't supposed to disregard who we care for b/c of their hue or race. But we shouldn't do the opposite either and disregard entire races or hues or ppl due to categorizing, and sterotyping. Truth is you can fall for anyone.
SweetVenom07 1 month ago
@MartinXNewton. Ok I can respect what your response to my reply was. All i'm saying is i've just been observing (especially as of late) some BM saying that BW are hard to deal with and it always goes to BW have this whole "Im an independent woman, i dont need a man blah blah crap" but if we aren't on that tip we get called golddiggers. Then its like BM say they want a strong woman but if some meet a strong BW she's difficult, a strong WW is "fiesty". Like i get confused at what it wanted lol.
SweetVenom07 1 month ago
Some BM will only date light skinned women and Some will only date dark skinned women, BUT a majority of them will go after either of them. HOWEVER, the bias that I have observed more often is BW saying they will not date light skinned BM. Being a light skinned BM I have been rejected for that reason. women that was blue I'd probably dig her too.
MartinXNewton 2 months ago
alot ofBM want to date lighter skinned women..this is because of handed down prejudice from Colonial times, and slavery.
You cant speak for all BM.
All black female celebs that are considered beautiful are light skinned...ever wondered why?
If Beyonce was as black as tar and she had a short afro would she still be considered a sex symbol?
the media promotes the white ideal of beauty &many BM just follow it.
'U pretty for a drk skin girl' the fact tht BM say that means that thers a problem
Applebaum 2 months ago
@Applebaum BW also say "he's good looking for a light skinned man".....so, you're point is...
MartinXNewton 2 months ago
Just like u guys dont want to be categorized, generalized, blamed, or put down, NEITHER DO WE! Its starting to grow old and sound like BM are whining. Its like "oh we date WW cuz BW are too hard to deal with. We want to be supported. We want to be treated like a king, etc,"Some of us do these things but a lot of BM are to jaded by their own mess of peer pressure, social standards, etc. to see the good ones. Everything's not easy BM, man up. And i love my BM, its just becoming redundant.
SweetVenom07 2 months ago
The BM you speak of have self-esteem issues. I date A wWoman, not wWOMEN. To date someone bc of their race or skin tone is shallow and defeats the essence of LOVE. If someone makes you happy, should you abandon your feelings due to the hue of their skin? There are actually times when I forget my woman is white and when it finally hits me I'm like "Holy Shit, you're white". All BW aren't hard to deal with, but strong women of any race are uncontrollable...but I love feisty woman.
MartinXNewton 2 months ago
No offense but you can't speak on behalf of the WHOLE black male population. So lets not once again put the BW down as the one perpetuating this nonsense. We have enough of criticisms without being blamed for this. Its funny too b/c the guys i've observed (notice the way that's phrased so i'm not generalizing or speaking on behalf of others) always say the same thing "I'm tired of BW sayin BM aint this or that. we're not all the same". Well why can't u guys see we aren't all the same either.
SweetVenom07 2 months ago
i agree 100% if anything i've seen waaay more black women who are color struck than black men waaay more look at the amount of sista's rockin blond weave blue contacts,calling themselves barbies look at the amount of sista's dating dudes cause the have good hair or they light skinned and will make a cute baby.how many sista's do you know that judge they self worth by white peoples beauty standards? how many sistahs do you know rock the natural look?how many show love 2 us brotha's vs negativity?
mnlkthms 2 months ago
@mnlkthms
No, that is called having the Michael Jackson syndrome. However, the overwhelming majority prefer their own BM and their is a split in what skin tones they like--some like light skin, many like dark skin, but their is a lot of us that don't care. On the other hand, their is a clear distinct pattern of BM overwhelmingly going for light skin women. That's no secret. But the overwhelming majority of BM prefer BW. So, there you go.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej get the fuck outta here it's self hatred period point blank.before you preach to me do me a favor cause the ironic part is that a white dude brought this to my attention.look at the overwhelming amount of black women down black men on you tube in favor for white guys look interracial dating on here there's a massive amount of sistahs switching over you go back and fourth with me all you want but look at the countless videos of black women putting down brothers and promoting that shit
mnlkthms 2 months ago
@mnlkthms
Yes, the Michael Jackson syndrome is self-hatred. Of course it is, you are right on the money about that. Also, I do see the videos of BW promoting the IR videos. You are right about that. But you have to admit, that it is very true that BM overwhelmingly go for light skin when it comes to their preference. BW it is more split. Also, BW have a lower percentage of dating and marrying outside of their race vs. BM--these are backed by stats. But, yes, all of it is the same.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej do you know how many brothers feel what i feel?i just need a strong sister by my side who's committed,i don't care about skin tone at all honestly, part of the reason i have no kids and i'm in my early 30's is cause i don't want drama or the chick that has 40 different guy friends she hangs out with i don't want a baby mama i need a wife a solid relationship is enough but sisters come with negative vibe sometimes that brings the worst out of us yet the don't do it to other races
mnlkthms 2 months ago
@mnlkthms
Yes they do. A fool is a fool no matter with whom they are mated. I have heard of stories of BW Bossing their White husbands or boyfriends and causing drama with other gruops of men. You don't want those BW anyway. They are clowns.
everagej 2 months ago
@mnlkthms
Yeah, it's hard because our whole generation is screwed up. The majority of us don't have any damn sense. However, I am seeing a strong emerging of young adults like us who are reclaiming our MINDS as BM and BW and trying to build something.
everagej 2 months ago
@mnlkthms
Oh yes, I know many brothers who think like you--very positive and ain't on the dumb stuff. That's who I seal with. Tha'ts why I am single, not b/c I can't find someone to date, but so many BM our not liberated--no knowledge of self and no self love. Low self esteem, depression, a feeling of unworthiness, DEFEATED. You can see it in their eyes, posture, dress, hear it in how they speak and see it from what they do. It's sad.
everagej 2 months ago
@mnlkthms
BM really don't need to be chastised and put down. They need to be loved to greatness. They need kind words, respect, and encouragement. If there is a disrespectful brother it's better to let him be and just keep it moving. But a lot of BM don't get the affirmation, support, encouragement, and love that they need to live a life of victory. BM need to first look in that mirror and start loving self, and form better relations with each other, and deal with supportive BW.
everagej 2 months ago
@mnlkthms
I seen your picture. I know when you do have children they are going to be cute......
everagej 2 months ago
Dude, you sound soo dumb. What do you think color struck is? That was not started just by a dark skinned chick--remember your skin type for a long time was considered ugly too for a BM. When you choose a peron on SKIN COLOR THEN YOU ARE COLOR STRUCK. That is technically what the term means. Also, stop THE B.S. that it is a preference. You should be more educated on the FACT THAT THE PROMOTION OF LIGHT SKIN IN OUR COMMUNITY HAS ITS ORIGINS IN WHITE RACISM AND OUR INTERNALIZATION OF IT!
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej Now you know you ain't have to come at the Brotha so aggressive with the words lol. This is a good Brotha like I'm sure you are too...
OuttaControlTroll 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
I am a good deep cinnamon brown Black Woman!! Lol! And yes I had to go there with the Brotha. I don't think he is dumb, I think he is in denial. I said he sounds dumb, but of course he is not dumb. I am just a realist. I am young and dating, I know what goes on and I know the politics of dating. I know the B.S. that a lot of us as BM and BW are on. BM are not the only contributors of problems in our relationships; BW are equally problematic--we dog each other.
everagej 2 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
Hell yea. Black women are selfish dumb azz self-hating sellout white man's whores who hate dark skin and real dark/brown-skinned black men, that's why we're is in deep shit. black women think that racist fake white people are their friends and their racist white "kings" men for real in love with them...smh!
hotplaye999 4 months ago
@gallyun1 Lets hope all these things the BM wants, he has himself.
feldman30012 4 months ago in playlist More videos from theadviseshow
I cant speak for most black men but the ones I lived around are...sorry to say. I lived around bm my whole life..including my father talked about lightskin women and long hair..lol. The process to healing is admitting that they have an issue. I really hate it when people call it preference when we know the real deal.
twoTQt 5 months ago
@twoTQt
Thank you!! People really need to stop calling their skin color biases preferences! It's a problem. Internalized racism all the way.
everagej 2 months ago
Color struck is the biggest BS I have ever heard. I would give up my left nut to hook up and go out on a date with Helena Andrews who's dark skinned and would run like hell away from Spicee Cajun who's light skinned. Search for these names in ytube and you'll see what I'm talking about. I assure you sistas out there, for most brathas, skin tone ain't got nothing to do with female choices, it's everything else.
rjhome1 5 months ago
I like Gabriel Union and Beyonce equally...one dark one medium light
420Mike713 5 months ago
This has been flagged as spam show
@420Mike713 'I like Gabriel Union and Beyonce equally...one dark one medium light'
they are both light skinned, do you like anyone as black as Alek Wek?
Applebaum 2 months ago
maybe ive been hiding under a rock or something but i really dnt know any "females" who think on tht level...thank god!!! one thing we must remember is tht you cant please everyone. attraction is very important and if you are not attracted to tht person (no matter wht the skin tone) you should just leave tht person alone and seek wht your heart really desires. in doing tht, you can keep dwn alot of confusion.
trudiamond30 5 months ago
(part 2)
has nothing to with it & i started putting folks into their place (when they disrespect me).
keta4332 5 months ago in playlist More videos from theadviseshow
(part 1)
i agree with you! when a man isn't attracted to certain complexion of black lady; he should EASILY say: you're not my type (he shouldn't get nasty about her complexion b/c that is rude & immature). i used to think "light skin men disrespect dark skin women, expecting sex in 2 wks" b/c i was getting disrespected by light skin men with them asking for sex in 2 wks w/o taking me on a date; of course i didn't have sex with them & they immediately disappeared... then i noticed COMPLEXION
keta4332 5 months ago in playlist More videos from theadviseshow
Comment removed
Nomorehataz 5 months ago
I went through phases as a teenager, at first the girl had to be "chocolate" on some "blacker the berry sweeter the juice" type shit. Then I had a summer of scoopin' up "redbones" all the light skinned chicks. When I grew up I realized it really don't matter what complexion they are as long as they are sincere & love the hell out of you. Black men aren't color-struck at all. The Sistaz might see it different lol. Thx for another great vid Bruh...
OuttaControlTroll 5 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
That's a lie, there are plenty of BM who make it clear they only date certain kind of women with a certain kind of complexion. You know that, stop lying. Color struck is not a separate definition from having a preference for a specific skin color--IT MEANS THE SAME DAMN THING!!! It is interchangeable. The video was not great, it was dumb as hell.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej Being "color struck" implies that a particular color is all your desire which is racist, I don't know ANY Black men like that. To have a preference just means 1rst on your "to-do" list but you'll date anyone no matter the color. I don't have to lie about anything everagej. Too bad you didn't enjoy the vid, I did.
OuttaControlTroll 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
What I am saying. What you are describing as a prefence does indeed fit the definition of colorstruck. You are simply describing a degree or level of how one can be color struck. USING A SKIN COLOR AS A FACTOR TO DETERMINE WHAT IS ATTRACTIVE IS CONSIDERED BEING COLORSTRUCK. Regardless to whether or not it is strong or weak. You are confusing the degree or level of color struck vs. the actual definition.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej Disagreed. If I have had relationships with various shades/races of women in my life then I can make a logical assessment on the shade of women I found most desirable through experience, making my unbiased choice a preference. I don't have the restrictions, limitations or lack of choices of being "colorstruck". There is no level or degree with me people are people. My preference is Sistaz so how do you define that?
OuttaControlTroll 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
If you are African-American or of African descent I would say you are acting naturally and healthy to deal with your own. Dealing with self and kind. If you live in a color struck, racist, White supremacist society that promotes light skin and whiteness 24/7 you are bound to experience a certain psychological effect from it. People of African descent are in denial of that reality and don't want to acknowledge.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej The Blacker the berry lol, I feel u. I ain't mean to get off on the wrong foot with you Bruh. I fight against the mental hangups we have as a people and it good to see another Brotha "giving a fukk" even if we bump heads on minor issues. I ain't perfect either so I'm not trying to come off like I know it all but I can def relate...
OuttaControlTroll 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
You know, it's funny. Other men always think they are talking to a man when I post. LOL!! You are not the first. I just find that interesting. Also, thank you for recognizing that I am simply having a healthy debate vs. attacking you personally. It's all good. We all have a difference of opinion. I just love Black people--ALL Black people we ALL look good. Nothing that we reproduce as long as it is healthy is unattractive or undesirable.
everagej 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
I like the variety we produce. It is soo exciting and amazing to look at. I think we forget how beautiful, awesome, and exotic that we look. We are mind boggling. I like to see the striking differences in our appearances. We are a walking, living, breathing mosaic. I preference nothing, b/c when I have children--they all going to come out as a mosiac of colors and features--how can I possibly choose which is better than the other?
everagej 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
If you prefer Black women I would say you have freed yourself of that particular form of PTSS--Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome or that particular form of internalized racism. Like I said, nothing produced from the loins of a BM and a BW, regardless of skin tone and features, is inferior ugly or undesirable b/c it comes from self and kind--my ethinic group. All of it is good. No Black person makes decisions free from the influence of White Supremacy.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej Yessir but more minds need to be freed as well, we got a helluva lot of work ahead of us but if we focus on the next generation it will speed up the healing process over the next few decades.
OuttaControlTroll 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
100% agreed. We need to work with the babies. I tell you--Black people need to pull their children out of these schools where their is nothing but White teachers who don't give a damn about them and aren't teaching them anything and they wonder why I children are failing. Also, having a Black owned school is not enough when you following the same failure program. Black schools, ran by conscious Black folks and lovingly and properly teaching our children.
everagej 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
You make a conscious decision to love self and kind and to choose based on that foundation. You are constantly battling pro-White propaganda in the Western world. We are force feed their beauty standards, their standards of manhood and womanhood--it is not of our creation and too many of us accept it w/o question--and we make decisions on our partners based on their paradigm. That's reality. Only a few of us actually take a break and think and go against the SQ.
everagej 2 months ago
@OuttaControlTroll
One thing we can agree upon. You are 100% correct that I personally think that regardless of color preference the overwhelming majority of BM will choose a pretty face and a nice body over skin color any day. However, I do know men who have strictly stayed with dating a particular skin color. They do exist.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej I see your point as well Bruh, healthy debate...
OuttaControlTroll 2 months ago
Color doesn't really hold any weight against the laws of attraction.
obatron1 5 months ago
BM are not color-struck, "attractiveness" trumps skin-color and BW fail to realize that.
Ex:You can meet a brotha who is into "light-skin" sistas and y'all decide to go to club right? So, in the club he peeps like 3 pretty dark-skin sistas and maybe a average light-skin sista. 9 times out of 10 he is going after one of those pretty dark-skin sistas in the group.
Attraction(and body type) is a major factor in what a BM is looking for and that can tip the scales for a BM's preference.
gallyun1 5 months ago 2
@gallyun1 Man your are right about everything you said
theadviseshow 5 months ago
@theadviseshow Nah Disagree. BM are indeed color struck I see a recurring theme throughout your vids. Jsut because you deny something, doesnt make it disappear.
feldman30012 4 months ago in playlist More videos from theadviseshow
@theadviseshow ...I do believe that "some bm" are colour struck. Not all. We all have preferences and that is different.
SuperTruthful 3 months ago
@gallyun1
Black men just like many BW are color struck. When you are using that as part of or as primary in your selection of a mate--you are stuck on skin tone. That is what the defintion technically means. Also, when I find out a BM is colorstruck I cut the dummy loose b/c apparently he is still dealing with a serious anti-Black inferiority complex. Nothing that what a BM or BW produces whether it is light or dark is inferior or more or less attractive it is all damn good.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej If you don't factor in attraction, I don't don't see how your argument will hold up. Facial features and body type are major factors in attraction. The reason blk people look at skin color as being the major indicator for attraction is because media images. Men in general are visual creatures and body types are a major factor for men.
Black women (mainly dark-skin) are more angry and harden about this topic. Keep in mind, the Lil Wayne's and Chad Johnson's cont.
gallyun1 2 months ago
do not represent the mindset of MAJORITY of black men. Black men are stereotyped as being "oversexed" (thirsty,lol) meaning that we will hit on any type of woman. How can we be "oversexed" and "color-struck" at the same time??.........hmmmm? That does not make sense, because color-struck falls in the lines of preference.
Now, when it comes to image, color-struck plays a factor. (ex. Jack and Jill paper bag test) Upper political and social groups like these are imbedded with cont.
gallyun1 2 months ago
this ideal. Realistically, most blk people don't look like Boris Kodjoe and Hallie Berry so blk men in general can not afford to be that picky. A black man WILL put preference aside over skin color if she has the right body type and cute face.
I don't deny color-struck people exist, but what I'm saying from a dating point of view, a blk men's desire to get a woman he will over look his personal preference.
gallyun1 2 months ago
@gallyun1 Also, I personally wouldn't want to deal with a BM with a skin tone preference. Why? I don't ever want to know I am considered "second rate" and that attitude will pop up--how he talks to you and treats you. Also, I don't want to have a bad sexual experience with a brother b/c he cannot perform very well in the bedroom b/c I am not his preference. That stuff happens, ok.
everagej 2 months ago
@gallyun1
Look, I don't want to be the one the BM "settled" with --my skin color should not be "overlooked"--it is a part of who I am and what makes me beautiful to me. If he doesn't like it--he can keep it moving. I hate to date BM who are all in your face, trying to date you, only in the end he is color struck and you are not it but wants to be in your damn face and get in between your legs--get the hell on with that.
everagej 2 months ago
@gallyun1
I interpret BM who do that kind of mess is basically stating through his words and actions that I am a toilet to relive himself in and not good enough to be his woman or wife. I am not Celie from the Color Purple, get your light skinned dream or White girl dream and stop cock blocking. I deal with Black men who prefer BW and love BW period regardless of skin tone. That's my preference.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej What are you talking about?? Who said you were Celie??? Why are you assuming I like like skin women???(this is not a healthy debate) Where are you getting all this??? Like I said before, you are not thinking outside box and your venting.
gallyun1 2 months ago
@gallyun1
I am talking in general, I am not talking about you personally. Where are you getting I am addressing you personally. I am talking about a BM who may think like that, not you, I never said you. Point out to me when I have said anything about you personally?
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej Lol, you don't have tell me you are not Cecile to make a point.............lol
gallyun1 2 months ago
@gallyun1
O.K. Point taken.
everagej 2 months ago
@gallyun1
So, now re read what I said in the context of what you wrote about BM not yourself but the BM with this so called skin tone preference.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej
Yes, I spelled relieve wrong. Lol! Damn, I am debating and I can't spell for sh*t.
everagej 2 months ago
@gallyun1
O.K. you can laugh at me now about the sexual experience one but I heard stories....
everagej 2 months ago
@gallyun1
My argument holds up b/c I have personally met BM who have dated nothing but White or/and or light skinned BW. Only a very few of them actually dated a dark skinned woman and that would be one or two times--I don't consider that being equal opportunity. Also, I know of BM who have dogged the features of dark skinned women, period and in the same breath uphold the image or have dated light skinned women or non-Black women who were clearly plain, unattractive, overweight...
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej
Bad teeth, dirty hair, to skinny or too fat, etc...There is a website dedicated to Black men and White women where the black men admit to exclusively dating and seeking to date or marry WW. Many BM, refuse to date either BW or dark skinned BW b/c the skin color is the most important and the only factor--it is the deciding factor. Many BM confess to not even being able to perform properly sexually if they are not with a woman who is either light skinned or white.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej There are websites for black women like this..........
gallyun1 2 months ago
@gallyun1
Fully aware of that. They on some dumb sh*t as well. I don't support them either. They suffering from PTSS. Let me put my viewpoint in this way. I am a BW. I love being Black, I love Black people, I love the features of Black people--in all of its variety. I don't suffer from an inferiority complex, meaning that I don't think that anything that a BW or a BM reproduces from their loins--as long as it is healthy is undesirable, unhealthy, ugly, not as attractive, etc..
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej
Also, is it any suprise that dark skinned women are more angry and harden. They have a right to be. They have been disrespected long enough. I may not have control over who you like and who you date, but dammit show me respect. There is no need to publicly ridicule dark skinned women, blast your so called preferences in public, and degrade dark skin women, make snide and cruel remarks about BW with dark skin tones, etc...
everagej 2 months ago
@gallyun1
Also, if it is a personal preference it needs to be kept to oneself. Treat others the way you would want to be treated. If stupid Black folks weren't so quick to verbalize their B.S. and mistreat other Blacks based on skin color--this conversation wouldn't even be going on. People are projecting their f**kedupness on their family, friends, peers, children, lovers, co-workers, etc... No one wants to hear that sh*t. Keep your so called preferences to yourself and keep it moving.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej Your venting.............. which is cool, but you are still missing my point. There deeper dynamics to people's attraction besides being color-struck. You have one side that is about preference and and one side is self-hate.
Also keep in mind your viewpoint does not represent the majority (think outside the box)
and I not your enemy, there is not need for to say "keep it moving".
gallyun1 2 months ago
@gallyun1 I meant no need for you to say "keep it moving".
gallyun1 2 months ago
@gallyun1
Also, I didn't say you need to keep it moving. What I meant was for people who want to verbally blast their damn preferences and mistreat those who don't fit their so called preferences can keep it moving. Also, I am not venting, I just call out B.S. And disgusing internalized racism and self-hate into 'PREFERENCES' is some damn B.S. I call it like I see it even if it comes off harsh.
everagej 2 months ago
@gallyun1
And your viewpoint doesn't represent the majority either. Why don't you think outside of your box. Look I know the difference between preference and self-hate. I think it is you that has a problem dealing with the reality that Black people have a serious case of PTSS--Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome; Internalized Racism, Internalized Oppression. The obsession with skin color and features was and continues to be fueld by WHITE RACISM. End of story.
everagej 2 months ago
@gallyun1
Also, I don't think you are the enemy, I am just expressing a difference of opinion. It's called a healthy debate.
everagej 2 months ago
@everagej Uh-huh.............lol
gallyun1 2 months ago
@gallyun1
I am not attacking you. I never accused you of having any skin color preference. I am talking about BM who think a certain way. I am not referring to you. Also, I am not venting, I am being real. My apologies if you thought otherwise.
everagej 2 months ago
We have a choice to date or pursue whoever we choose. Darker black women just aren't happy in their skin and cant accept people have their own preference.
JoJoStar22 5 months ago
@JoJoStar22
No, what it is we are tired of dummy's like you who think it is o.k. to get in a public sphere and in our face and have the damn nerve to tell us that we are NOT IT! AND WE NEED TO STEP BACK! It's disrespectful and it's childish and cruel to make it a point to put someone down and try to make them feel like crap b/c they don't have the hue you so call prefer. Also, it is ignorant and internalization of White Supremacy to think light skin is more highly attractive.
everagej 2 months ago