Andrew Dice Clay - Pollstar Awards - Feb 2008

[Moreoff]

"We'll take it out...we'll make a beautiful... presentation"....Classic Dice!

[nwa2664]

Dice is still hilarious ! And his material is spot on !

[bolmajd]

*this fucking thing like im runing for president mother fuking..* looooooooool 4:59

[Loyalty1269]

"I just put the key in the fuckin ignition!!! look out the window im still there!!!" lmao

[MrDMDias]

@ 2:10 i ..... AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[BigaPigs]

A few politically correct assholes I work with could use a dose of Dice once in a while.

[Eight1Eighty2]

Dice is the best because he says the things people think but would never say, and his deliver is like no other.

[jay8368]

The best

[WeirdestRapper1]

THE FUNNIEST IS AT THE END, WHENHE LAUGHES ATHIMSELF & ANNOUNCES TIMBERLAKE & PINK----HAHAH-HES GONNABE IN BROKLYN OCTOBER 1ST

[colfinator]

Been watching him since i was a kid, To date, no comedian can touch him, Kickass Dice!

[chinezyxx]

He's fucking funny !! Fuck you all who think " he's pretty funny ".

[Loyalty1269]

he'll always be the best

[Anth150]

This. Fucking. Sucked. I'm sorry. This was terrible.

[DJ817FELONY]

@Anth150 THIS SHIT WAS FUKIN HILARIOUS!!!!! WAT ARE U WATCHINGG

[reichmarshall]

Dice is now officially an OLD comic, with his own variation of "these crazy kids today..." But he's still hilarious.

[1972para]

Funny fucker alright ! Love the Dice!

[bigbopper993]

@1972para I agree,,,,,,dice is hilarious,,,,,,one of my idols,,,,,,,,,please check out my video,,,,,,,"yuk yuks Big Bopper is angry",,,,,,,,,and share with your friends if you think it is funny,,,,,,thanks for your time god bless

[LevelHeadOpinion]

Dice is still pretty funny

[bustballz]

beyond hilarious..the funniest fucker EVER...dice is the MAN!

[toolbass24]

Legend

[bananafence]

you know what a stand-up used to be? wank on the phone!! wow!!

[germass1]

Typical American unfunny asshole. He is as funny as as a blind albino child with cancer. Billy Connolly is the godfather of comedy. He paved the way for all stand up comedians. Dice Clay is shite. End of story

[Darkez982]

@germass1

Billy paved the way? Ever heard of Bill Cosby or George Carlin?

[NOISETECHNICIAN1]

@Darkez982

Bill Cosby sucked and Carlin's a dead fuck. Someone always came first and paved the way you pointless twit.

[Darkez982]

@NOISETECHNICIAN1

No, all i'm saying is they paved the pay before Billy Connolly. The end

[NOISETECHNICIAN1]

@germass1

Blind albino with cancer is hilarious.

[babylonkid]

Dice is the comedy god. "Like im running for president mutha fucka".

[chopitallupa187]

this shit is hilarious!

[ScipiondeFrance]

laist.com/attachments/lindsayr­ebecca/penis-size-map.jpg

[milkywaycenter]

What ever you think about Dice...that was fucking hilarious

[qbnas]

its a joke repeat! andrew fat clay.

[babylonkid]

@qbnas this coming from a homo who has street fighter videos on his page. wow. your a fuckin twat loser.

[createculture]

@qbnas Zombie Asshole

[danning1]

The only thing worse than a celebrity who was famous for fifteen minutes is one who doesn't seem to REALIZE that he or she was only famous for fifteen minutes! Besides Dice, Vanilla Ice comes to mind. At least Gerardo, Debbie Gibson, and the guys in Milli Vanilli spared us all years of pathetic public appearances or comeback attempts. They seemed to have a better sense of how far they fell, anyway.

[babylonkid]

@danning1 Are you kidding? 15 minutes? How old are you? You should suck Dice's dick because he is the one who paved the road for the shitty comics over the past 20 years. Thanks to Dice you can get away with cursing on tv and the radio. Do your homework jerkoff.

[penn4644]

Hey! West and news-whatever, shut the fuck up, get the fuck outta here and get a fuckin' room already! And what are your real names, Neil and Bob or is that like what you do?

[babylonkid]

@penn4644 Ford Fairlane baby!

[joethecabdriver]

An acquired taste, unless you are a psychotic douchebag. It's amazing that anyone thought this guy could have broken through to mainstream success in the early 90's, but he almost did. The Day The Laughter Died is one of the strangest, funniest performance art pieces of all time.

[Moreoff]

Hysterical ad lib 4:01

[setpunk12]

finally someone speaks the truth

[WestcoastMusicals]

@newsakafias obviously anyone educated person can spot a typo,compared to your repeated purposely misspelled words. most of those words I think you really don't know how to spell,and that's where the shame comes in...I blame your parents.

[Gyro911]

So funny and so true unfortunately with todays social scene

[WestcoastMusicals]

@newsakafias I'm on the internet and you know nothing of me,but you make an odd assumption that I'm half jewish and half black,lol. What a racist prick in denial you are. Also you think that because I know of Andrew Dice Clay I must not be a black person? What an as of an assumption you are. Also those aren't abbreviation,those are gibberish your cell phone texting generation started.

[WestcoastMusicals]

@newsakafias What's Jewish mom have to do with this video? Also you need to learn to spell properly;elementary grammar is too easy to fail at like you did.

[WestcoastMusicals]

i'm black and Andrew Dice Clay is a King of comedy.Anyone who dislikes his humor is a sheltered,bitter loser,or a strict Amish or orthodox person,which I can repsect.you losers I will never respect though.

[heinzkitzvelvet]

My hero.

[DylanlovesSk8ing]

I wonder how many black people looked down in guilt at their pants knowing they can't live up too andrews standards.

[mykcheck1212]

Diceman for president 2012

[RAIDERS7009]

DICE RULES.. LMAOO

classic

[bogdani]

"this fuckin' thing .....as if i'm running for President..mother fuckers"

[bogdani]

best bit "this fuckin thing.....as if i'm running President.. mother fuckers" LOL!!

Gotta love the Dice Man - his Madison Square Garden show -"top of the world ma" is his finest moment. Great show by any standards!

[MarkaRoxx]

DICE MAN !!! DICE RULES DICE IS KING DICE IS KING DICE IS KING

[charlene12341234]

I love him, nevertheless, nevertheless, he could use some muscle tone in his arms. The issue is not a black man's dick, but a black man's wallet- white people know this-that's the real issue- money power, and power and control of their lives!

[MILLIONZofUS]

If he wasn't such an arrogant rapist fucking girls BEFORE they're wet, girls wouldn't have to spit on it!!

Women should stick a dry baseball bat up his ass, no mercy

[NY1love]

@MILLIONZofUS for those who don't know, he's talkin about getting a blowjob. Chicks spit on it in that act.

[MILLIONZofUS]

@NY1love You're assuming he wasn't about to stick it in her.

Ok, she thinks he's about to stick it in her, so she has to get it wet first, - and HE SAYS, "i will come before it gets in your fanny- RIGHT IN YOUR FACE HA HA HA". (Hilarious self- congratulattion on being both inadequate AND selfish as a lover & ensuring a joyless, rewardless experience for the hapless partner who finds herself lumbered with frustration & degardation as he snores contentedly)

Evolution where the fuck are you?

[Santaslave666]

Asshole people.

[BOX5]

one of the greatest of all time,on my personal mt rushmore fo sho with murphy,pryor,carlin yell

[cryptogramz]

dice loves black dick

[BazzaSaysHi]

I don't understand how this guy can be such an utter arsehole one moment and then really funny the next, like on this clip. There's some funny material here - it's a shame he doesn't always concentrate on what's actually funny, instead of most of the time thinking that being an obnoxious jerk on stage or in a studio is funny - perhaps I'm missing the point. I'll find some more of him and see if he wins me over :)

[bathetcnow]

haven't seen dice in a while....hes still got it man....and hes dead on

[fizzlejibbs]

LOL I love how he always wears those huge fuckin *I just got out of eye surgery* sunglasses.

[universalself]

yeah,his act is vile,repulsive + unredeemable but hes a oneoff + he gives me the giggles-wud luv 2 c his act in an actual venue

[universalself]

mr supergrumpy...dice is still obnoxious...still a national treasure

[Grecdogg]

Like Im running for President! LOLLL

[Grecdogg]

The only thing I want Black is the chick underneath me! LOL

[ChainsmokingPothead]

well usualy 25years old and under that suits pretty much perfectly in :D

as top comment sez.

but I'm sure if I wuz 14 and heard this guy I probably laugh as well.

[drumdude46]

(con'd f/ drumdude)

due to Trends and Que’s we take from TV and the Media. Blackberry. Bluetooth. Orange County Housewives. Give me a fucking break.

Reality TV. The downfall of intelligence as we know it.

I love this guy all over again................!!! I hope he stages a comeback. We need, albeit under the guise of “comedy Sketch”, this kind of Truth. Go Dice Clay!

[drumdude46]

This guy is a “release” for all the Angst we’re feeling about this Stupid, Affected, Shallow, Entitled

“Britney Spears/Paris Fuckhead Hilton, Asshole Society today. Wonderful. Love this Masochistic Rant, which incidentally pretty much Tells it like it is…… just Priceless! Lol! While all the Fucking Idiots in this Audience

Sit there and probably don’t even “Get it”. His total frustration at witnessing the

De-evolution of our already moronic society,

[penn4644]

@drumdude46 Exactly! I could not agree more nor stated it better.

[TheXecutioner09]

@gregpatrikios WTF!, guy writes a friggin letter like Andrew uploaded this vid?! Was the post office closed?

[gregpatrikios]

Hey Andrew,

My name is Greg and live in Copenhagen Denmark..Loved this very much.. saw you at MGM in Las Vegas in 98... awesome.. take care greg

[amazindan]

Dice is the fucken BEST!!! He still has it!!!!!

[penn4644]

Dice is the MAN ! Exactly ! The modern day Don Rickles. He says shit we all know but don't have the balls to say it. This bit just makes my day.

[1Arrogante1]

This guy is EPIC!

[ScienceIsKnowledge]

He did the same jokes, over, and over and over and over and......

[mderner86]

lol this fuckin thing like im runnin for president

[metalslut1]

Whoever gets offended with this needs to get a life!!! Political correctness is a sickening poison and you people that perpetrate it are no better! You are just looking for an EXCUSE to be offended and need to relax and get a life!!!

[TheBanyanEmperor]

@metalslut1 Sounds like you are quite offended by this...

[metalslut1]

@TheBanyanEmperor Not at all! People need to relax and loosen up. They get offended tooooo easy.

[romski4u]

Whoever says his shit isn't funny is one of the half fags he's talking about. So shut up and listen cuz you might just learn something.

[leibweiss]

the best

[volksrepair]

DICE STILL RULES!!!!!!!!! If you didn't laugh your ass off at this, you have NO sense of humor!

[babylonkid]

"Thank you. I know."

[postalcode2934]

say whatever you want about him. he's vulgar, sexist, crude, disgusting, obscene, and yet he's telling the truth. his stuff may have been blasphemous two decades ago, but if Andrew Dice Clay had never been around in the 80s & was a new comedian today, people would call him a genius. everything that was unheard of 30 years ago is so readily available now, this stuff actually seems kind of tame.

[babylonkid]

@postalcode2934 couldnt agree more. he paved the way for the pussies today. he started it all. thanks to him, people can say and do almost any thing on tv. because of dice.

[gardenofarcane]

@postalcode2934 He is telling truth about you not everyone, he just an arrogant heeb.

[gardenofarcane]

King huh he's a arrogant KIKE! he is not even funny when acts like a wise guy, its too old and cappy anyone can be offensive.

[babylonkid]

@gardenofarcane but he was the first. remember that.

[jmoney507]

@gardenofarcane wow, nice use of the jewish racial slur, you puke!

[gardenofarcane]

@jmoney507 I am sure he wont complain, you turd.

[jmoney507]

@gardenofarcane dude, i myself have been called a kike, and your just an asshole

[knightrider411]

This was 10 stars omg my gut hurts for real

Lol. 15 inch soft rrrrrrr that shit had me dying

I wish they gave this guy another shot at the Garden

[TheMarchon1]

THE KING!!!

[meshuggener667]

I FELT 26 TIMES FROM THE CHAIR.MY STOMACH IS IN PAIN.ME BRAIN IS ROLIN.

I LOVE THIS GUY.TRUE GUYZ ARE IN EXILE THESE DAYS...

[j4unumber1]

Love ya Diceman! Stay cool...

[DiamondSoul]

Great stuff. So real. Made me laugh hard too!

[tehf00n]

that was 100% funny.

[ChrJahnsen]

Can you believe it? He's 50 at this time and he is still the coolest man on the planet!! DICE FOR PRESIDENT!

[CatchYourSoul]

FUKING KING

[GayRocker81]

"Justin's prolly fuckin' Pink...where's the award?!"  ROFLMMFAO! GOD! I love Dice.

[neonauj]

this guy makes me laugh i dont know about u pussies but i laughed instantly when he tapped the mic with his pack of smokes. he actually kinda reminds me of myself in a way. i in no way wanna be like him or do his comedy skit, i do my own thing but i cant help but to see some of the smilarities.

wut ya gonna cry now or call me a queer? go screw yourselves you can food taking whoremongers.

[BreatherOfAir180]

HE IS NOT FUNNY, just more shock value.

[muclesmarinara]

@BreatherOfAir180 you don't think he's funny because you are one of those cellphone assholes. always texting about some stupid trivial shit.

[Jimani2012]

Justins probably fuckin Pink

[MediaMisDirected]

andrew dice clay for president!

[nolderine]

personally I would have liked to have seen a bill hicks(intellect) vs dice man(attitude) stage stand off .That would be funny !

[JERRYSIXX1]

DICE RULES IS THE KING OF COMEDY

[chankagogo12]

long live the dice man. great standup. one of his best.

[owynkerr123]

love his attitude!

[hottubcliffordjames]

Justin's probably fuckin' Pink, best line I heard in a while!

[ErikCartman]

this guy maybe an asshole but this is controlling of the crowd like nobody else so good for you dice you made history

[StuntManPliskin]

This clip is priceless. Dice is on top of his game!!

[JERRYSIXX1]

The Dice Rules.. asshole people

[Flerg3]

fuck cell phones. he's right.

[whitetruck76]

Clay is the only comedian ever to sell out Madison Square Garden, Fenway Park, and Dodger Stadium in one year. Even Pryor and Carlin didn't do this.

[greenblue1979]

And that MSG gig was two straight nights.

[nizmojoeblows]

@whitetruck76 maybe because so many people wanted to beat the fucking man dead? He doesn't go to parties anymore because no one has invited him to one since '86.

[pipesrussell]

No talent fat balding Jew.

[jusdevache]

And you must be the talented Anti-Semite right?

Wanker.

[pipesrussell]

Merci le lait (laid)!

T'as bien raison mon crosseur.

[StuntManPliskin]

yeah, UK for da DICE MAN!!

[solpapisolmook]

"No talent"? So your faggot ass can sell out Madison Square Garden then? Can you even sell out your living room, you dumb cocksucker?

[pipesrussell]

@solpapisolmook

Only in the dumb ass United States would he be able to draw an audience with his malodorous shtick.

[solpapisolmook]

@pipesrussell IRONY: Some cocksucker making fun of Dice for being a Jew.....and then using a Yiddish phrase. Idiot.

And in regards to your US envy, I asked you a question; could you even sell out your living room, idiot? In your intelligent country.

[pipesrussell]

@solpapisolmook

I was making fun of Clay because he is irrelevant and stale. I did enjoy his bullshit when I was 12, but Ive moved on and evolved.

U.S. envy?!?!, You must be out of your micro-cephalic mind or as ignorant as I thought you would be.

Thanks for your feeble attempt at posting a comment on my page. Idiot.

[solpapisolmook]

@pipesrussell No, you implied that Americans are stupid and said that only in the US would Dice be able to draw an audience....and then you admitted you used to be part of his audience, you fucking jackass.

Aside from your hypocrisy, I asked you a simple question; the man sold out MSG twice. He's the only comic to do this. Can you sell out your living room? Can you sell out your closet?

And I wasn't expecting you to be a frightened bitch who has to screen page comments. Idiot.

[McCaler]

Yup. He's very blunt alright.

[badLuckrapp]

even months later

i can be baked and come back to this for a laugh

lmao "thats why i dont even go to parties anymore'

[geogodley]

I'M OVER HERE NOW LOOK AT ME NOW, TANK YOUOU, GOOD 4 ME GOOD 4 YOU that u should suck ma goo

[DJ88hairMetal]

HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHhAHAHAHhahahaha­hhahahaha

i freaking love Dice xD talk about up-front and personal xD

[SendinK9]

London Broil hitt'en the kitchen counter ROTFL!!!

[static4real]

hahaha wow its not that hes a great comedian....its that he tells it str8 up and dont give a fuck lol like this foo just seriously dont give a fuck lmao....he would diss a black person in the hood of harlem and not care and diss a white man at the white house and take his drink lmao...he just dont give a shit lol...thats what makes him real...and THATS why u came to this page lol

[TeRRlFieD]

Best comedian hands down. He's still funny. And all you haters...why are you here? Dice has been around so if you don't like him..LEAVE. You come on here and try to talk smack and act all tough bringing up these lame comedians that blow who don't even compare to Dice.

[WTAdair]

"Are they here? No! We're the assholes that are here. Justin's probably FUCKING Pink!" LOL!!!!!!!!!

[7beers]

The Diceman has still got it!!

[vmax4ya]

Dice was kinda funny in the 80s ,only because he was rude and new as a dont give a damn guy...now..hes just loud,fat, and tired...

[PlacentaPudding]

People that don't think Andrew Dice Clay is funny, are usually 25 years old and under.

His stuff isn't funny now, but in the 80's he was a headliner for about 4-5 years.

Say what you want, but nobody had as much bravado nor were they as raunchy as the dice man.

[StuntManPliskin]

I'm 25 years old, and I discovered Dice when I was around 18. I thought he was hilarious back then, I think he's hilarious now.

A lot of people I know think he's funny, and I'm talking about people that are 25 years old or younger.

[kodiak1966]

@PlacentaPudding I like this guy,he tells it like it is! The truth hurts for some people.

[MikeyRB77]

@PlacentaPudding Thanks for your opinion. What people find funny is objective. For you to state "His stuff isn't funny now" suggests that you are a professional comedian OR a journalist. Are you? 

[PlacentaPudding]

@MikeyRB77 Wouldn't it be subjective?

Anyway, he dropped a lot of his "offensive" material. That stuff appealed to me and made me laugh. So now his stuff isn't funny to me (or as funny).

I don't know how being a journalist or comedian would make my opinion any less or more relevant. I can laugh. I can listen. Thus I can be part of an audience.

[Raspout1981]

This guy is hilarious

[szahedi]

Pure Comedy!

[knowledgeo1]

One of the all time best. DICE. To all the haters, go watch some pussy seinfeld standup or something. Bunch of pussys.

[vaportrails44]

hahahahahahahahaha omg this is fucking hysterical...dice was on this night

[Sweezelballin]

Dice is the king. He is 100% absolutely right. I see dumb fucking bimbo chicks with no money in the bank, driving moms shitty car yet they "fag out" holding their cell phone in 1 hand while carrying their fake LV purse over the shoulder as if to advertise "their new phone" Holy shit. Simply pathetic. It is like they are carrying a baby in their hand. Get a grip u wackos. A cell phone has been out since the 80s. It is not a status symbol you rejects! Hit me up with +10.. You know its true

[dzanier]

You make a very good point about cell phones. I remember that behind the plate at Yankee Stadium during the playoffs these idiots would be on their cell phones, & I was convinced they were talking to nobody, or they made the call on purpose as if to say, "Look at me. I'm an idiot & I'm on television". It was pathetic. Considering how uncreative most of Dice's work is, this schtick about how we've lost touch with what really is fun, & how we've become "verbally" uncommunicative is perceptive.

[Sweezelballin]

@dzanier Lol yea I have been to the yankees stadium as well and I see tools on their cell phones becuase they are on tv behind the plate. Little do they realize they look like goof balls at a baseball game talking on a damn phone that they probably paid $500 for a ticket for. Idiots!

[blackbart19422]

@Sweezelballin You are so right !!! ya !!!!

[knowledgeo1]

this guy is the best...

[miroccio]

This fucking thing, like im running for president mother fucker.. HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAAHAHAHAHA­HAAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAH­AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

[ClientSurfer]

That's funny like fuck

[Flipflopab]

Ain't he a charmer

[evh5150316]

We'll make a beautiful presentation, but it's not going to sound like a london broil hitting the kitchen counter....

That is PURE GENIUS!!!!

[RuralCoconut]

LMFAO!!!!!

[Loyalty1269]

LMFAO!!!!!

[mikeknight4u]

London Broil.... ROFL!

[governorgilf]

God, that guy is hilarious!

[Bmatt2163]

LMFAO!!!!!

[aeroebigg]

dice rulez!!!!

[boriboy]

lololol dice is always gonna b the man

[mrwrestling7]

Dick Gregory, Lenny Bruce, Bill Cosby [Ol' school Cos], George Carlin, Richard Pryor, Bill Hicks and Mitch Hedberg. I love them all. But Dice has a VERY special place in my heart. One funny a** mutha f#%ker!!!

[tirejack]

dice rules

[mr6616]

4:03-4:07 LMAO!!!!ha!ha!ha! LOL!!!!!

this fucken thing!

like i'm running for president mother fucker!!

ha!ha!ha!

[philphilphilphil1234]

oh yeah by the way, shut the fuck up.

[philphilphilphil1234]

you probably drive a ferrari to make up for your little dick, the rest of us only need phones, but excuse me you're probably still the coolest guy ever.

[metalschooldrill]

The country would be a lot better off if ADC was president.

[Benjodstand77]

ADC dont go to parties no more cos no one is dumb enough to invite him to one

[SinfulPresentation]

What a fucking simian-minded dumb fuck! He should actually take time to write some joke material instead of just telling his point of view on stuff with his unoriginal look and act. He should shut his homosexual, panic bitch mouth up and lose the cigarette. It was part of his act since the 80s but has no comedic relevance. Especially, since he quit smoking. KILL YOURSELF DICE!

[kranked1]

u hav no sense of humour

[SinfulPresentation]

Not with Dice because his presentation sucks. Decent material for being improvised but nothing great.