Added: 3 years ago
From: danniniggggz
Views: 397,830
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  • This happened today! And I was thinking about this joke afterwards

  • which one was the one when he said his dog swolloed his condom?

  • This is some dirty jokes

  • My lil sis she is 8 she accidentally watched this and is asking me "Questions"

  • Dane cook is sooo funny

  • @killerblocks Theres more scientific fact behind biblical theory than the theory of evolution.

  • Dane cook is Awsome and this was halierios he's supper funny

  • Right when Everyday Commented that he was gay. Everyone started commenting some sexual, ignorant comments. U guys are fucked up...

  • @69heheh69 Yes, I think we've established that fact.

  • I was eating while watching this....... Nothing happened........

  • His parents died??? And WTF y r u guys fighting about gay ppl? They dont go to ur house screaming "haha u fucking douche I'm gay an ur straight U CAN SUCK IT!" I wish they did so u ppl wuld just bak off they r awesome(:

  • 60 people may dislike, but i bet they listened all the way to the end.

  • Bubba gump if u think gays are stupid put urself in their shoes teased every day and afraid but I know gay people and their very nice and no I'm not gay but I think god is not real now before haters hate and trolls troll I'm not atheist and I respect your opinion and u should respect other peoples too

  • Comma, Ejaculation, Period ... hopefully xD

  • all gay people god still loves you and you should just forget all the evil people that try to bring you down becouse they do that because they are just insecure I may be strait but that doesn't mean i should automatically look down on gays thats like being white and looking down at black people horrible and inexcuseable

  • You suck Cook you douche bag.. Your mother and father suck just for having a jerk off like you

  • @davgabe umm dont look this stuff up then?

  • @davgabe Well both his parents died from cancer so I guess you're happy now.

  • Let people live how they want. If they want to be gay, fine. If they want to be straight, fine. If they want to believe in God, fine. If they don't, fine. If they're republican, fine. If democrat, fine. But don't judge someone for their beliefs. You live your life, let them live theirs, and stay out of it.

  • @jb0Ogi3 Live and let live?

  • @jb0Ogi3 if they want to judge u on ur beliefs fine

  • @jb0Ogi3 my brothers gay and someone at school said they have a prob with gay ppl so i told him so it really doesn't matter.

  • im happy that in the end all gays burn in the deep dark pits of wich we call hell

  • @bubbagumpshrimp14 What the FUCK is your problem?

  • @bubbagumpshrimp14 Who said that? Did God tell you that? no? so dont ASS.U.ME it seems ignorant but even if u dont believe in God why would someone who loves someone else that is the same sex as them go to hell? because the bible says? tell me where it says in the bible that gays are going to hell? and dont give me anything fake please. i am so serious about this like why are gays considered disgusting? Just because you dont kiss a guy or a girl or love them how is it disgusting?

  • @brokenpuzzlepieces i so agree with youu! i love gay peoplee! i consider them regular people and alot of people tease them and that pisses me off-.-''

  • how the fuck can an argument like this start on a video like this??

  • wow epic

  • This ass hole is the worst comic ever he sucks would smash his face in if I ever saw him

  • @davgabe why is this a touchy subject, was a broken condom part of your life oh wait... it caused your life didnt it pwned

  • Pause, comma, ejaculation. Period - hopefully.

  • "period. hopefully." LOL

  • Dane Cook is the result of a broken condom.

  • GAY

  • Okay, this whole lesbian/gay thing is really pissing me off. People have views and rights. Just because they're different then you doesn't mean you have ANY right to degrade or mock them because of it.

    It's effing Dane Cook. Do we HAVE to even be arguing about this? This is like when people argue about how terrible of a singer Justin Bieber is on a Metroid video.

  • "balls, ejaculation, period... HOPEFULLY" lol

  • @Juggalettesunnshine People who don't wan a venerial disease

  • You forgot part of your title: there should be a "was conceived due to a" in there.

  • Awww baby im gona fucking EJACULATE! Im gona try that and see what my gf does XD

  • "HOPEFULLY..."

  • DANE COOK IS COMEDY FOR RETARDS

  • pause comma ejaculation...period hopefully. LMFAO

  • Wtf this is dirty

  • Dane Cook a worthless DOUCHE BAG

  • @davgabe i bet he loves you to ;)

  • how come comedy on youtube always attracts the fights?

  • @21526001270528 because it's not a because comedy is not meant to be taken seriously. So in turn, people feel that they can comment however they like

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath if they were allowed to comment however they wanted to, fights wouldnt occure because they shouldnt take it seriously. ironic

  • @everydayalittledeath lesbians are fucking AWESOME

  • @deadman163441 AMEN TO THAT. LOL im jk im not a lesbian or a girl. im a guy who is straight

  • I LOVE how she DOESN'T LAUGH LIKE AN IDIOT

  • Here is another example of a complete hack who has to resort to having a potty mouth to get a laugh...Brian Regan is clean and funny...dont get fooled by Dane Cook and his stuff he steals off other comedians

  • *Sweatdrop*, probably gonna get flamed for this, but honestly, guys, (when i say guys I mean guys and girls, although i guess i don't really have to explain that), why must we tear each other down, i mean, honestly, how is this gonna build anyone up, anyhow, i'm probabably gonna get some people insulting me now, but, seriously, no matter what anyone says, humans always go on and find faults anyhow, come on, aren't we more evolved than that?

  • This fight over someone like this is so far back I got lazy and stopped looking for the reason behind this whole rampage. I like Dane Cook and that should be the only thing yall are talking about one comment from someone should not ruin the comment section of this video. Just calm down lol

  • Balls, Comma, ejaculation, Period. Hopfully... lol

  • mmmmmarcus go find something better to do you twat.

  • i found one on my bus no realy i did

  • I didn't play the video. I just came here to say Dane Cook sucks.

  • It's funny because Dane Cook is a broken condom.

  • balls, ejaculates, period. hopefully!!!! ROLF, naw, im still in my chair

  • XD "balls,comma,ejaculate,period.­"

  • @Marki4231 Lmao!!!

  • This frat house D bag is about as funny as a funeral

  • dane cook is beast

  • Why the fuck do u record this if u cant even understand what the fuck he's saying

  • Haters...

  • they actually laugh at the word ejaculate... immature AND brainless ...

  • @DerMoll are u a virgin ? i mean seriously , we dont need u fuckin GAY comments in here , just dont watch it and even if u didnt like it .... dont comment please !!!

    p.s: f*** you

  • @demonofyou1 I can safely state that i have ventured into the pleasures of heterosexual intercourse quite a bit. as to commenting on something i don't even like: if some moron is allowed to make fun of using condoms publically and be praised for that, why shouldn't i be allowed to mock that guy and the people who adore him?

    p.s.: suck it :)

  • @DerMoll because he's not mocking anyone... He's mocking condoms...

  • @DerMoll there is nothing to stop you and you are more than entitled to your opinion and you're entitled to voice it but ask yourself this, under the curcumstances why would you? You must know that when you mock something that is on the video someone is going to jump on the defensive bandwagon and have a go at you. If you are in fact just looking for an argument (and from time to time who doesn't enjoy playing devil's advocate) then could ya not do it somewhere else not because you're not...

  • @DerMoll ...allowed to do it here but because many of us on youtube would rather not view an argument on every comments page. If you want just ignore what i said, that's up to you but for other's sake please don't.

  • @demonofyou1

    Hey. Don't you effing use gay as an insult, you simpleminded twat

  • @SoftWaterSeas As I said to mysticowner4, yes I AM gay. And proud of it. Got a problem with that?

  • @SoftWaterSeas

    I'm "nasty" because I happen to be a girl who likes girls?

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath yes ur nasty

  • @SoftWaterSeas you should die in a hole bitch! she has the right to do what ever she wants!

  • @ThePrincessken u must be a dyke too, fat ass

  • @ThePrincessken Thank you for defending me

  • @mysticowner4 Yeah, I am. Got a problem with that?

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath alright dont be gay about it

  • @doza2112 I'm gay about everything. I'm a LESBIAN. Gay means homosexual, it does not mean stupid, or uptight or any of the other insults homophobes use it for

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath no gay means happy. homosexual means homosexual. just like cock means rooster. people pervert so many words these days. its just stupid

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath You don't like people using "gay" as an insult because it's simple-minded and homophobic... but you use "twat" as an insult even though it's simple-minded and misogynist. You're a genius.

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath GayGayGayGayFagot. Rofl, using gay as an insult doesn't make someone a simple minded twat. I have nothing against homosexuals, gay is generally used as an insult, fucking deal with it. I'll use gay as an insult if I want and it doesn't make me simple minded or a homophobe. Gay doesn't even mean homosexual, it means happy, it's just what our culture changed it to, just as it is now being used as an insult. Fell free to go to another website or country if you don't like it.

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath I love you <3

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath sorry to break youre sheltered life bubble but gay people use gay as an insult but in a joking way so research shit before you open your twat.

  • @TheXsanity yes, gay people do and that's fine. but I take offense when straight people do it.

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath how dare u use the best thing in the world as an insult? AND called it dumb? u must be gay, fag.

  • @dbfro1 Okay, I'll admit twats are pretty damn awesome. I never said they were dumb. And yes, I am gay, haven't we covered this? And if you want to insult me, it would be dyke, not fag, thank you VERY much.

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath youre welcome lol.

  • @dbfro1 HAHA FTW!!

  • @EveryDayALittleDeath dont u hate math? its fuckin GAY

  • @redneckthrillbilly Math's not gay. It's DEPRESSING. If you think it's gay, you're probably one of those nerdy kids with no friends. I mean, seriously, who finds math HAPPY?

  • dooode Zomg dane coook is soo motha fucking funnny i allmost pissed myself

  • Pause comma ejaculate period hopefully Hahahahaha

  • i love him!

    hes hot&funny<3

  • Dane cook has the charisma of a broken condom as well :/

  • Habubuu higuha wajagazaka -_- ejaculate does enywan ssay ejaculate>_< its like boooom o_0

  • i love dane cook so much, but i prefer his non-sexual jokes. his sex jokes never really get to me.

  • i like robin williams *somewhat* better than dane cook. but i didnt know it was dane when i heard some of his stuff. when i found out i was surprised. i think he's the physical-humor guy, and williams does the verbal and 'true' comedy. :) i dont hate either, but im not totally obsessed with them.

  • somebody tell me why the security guard dude isn't laughing at all when i can watch these over and over again and still laugh?

  • danecook is great the video quality is bad

  • dane cook has that natural kick ass sense of humor

  • Funniest man to ever live!!! EVER!!!!!!!

  • period. hopefully...

  • lucky u go to see it

  • hey thanks for the video,, yours was the best i've seen.

  • @themrwesman If you're going to correct someones spelling, at least have the intelligence to use the proper grammar. You know, capitals, periods, commas and such. Genius.

  • @RandiM and remember to put the ejaculations in there too

  • @RandiM It's genious bud:)

  • It is most likely little 14 year old idiots, or 30 year old pathetic wastes still living at home with mommy who go around trashing every video's comment log. It's because they are so worthless that talking shit about everything makes them feel better about their pathetic existances. If you don't like a video, don't watch it. It's a simple as that. If you feel that bad about yourself that you have to talk shit about everything then maybe you should do something about it, scumbags.

  • Dane Cook has the +30, used female demographic locked in. What a badass.

  • Pause. Comna. Ejactulation. Period....hopefully.

  • Pause, comma, ejaculate, period…hopefully. Rofl. I love Dane cook!!!!

  • @themrwesman he obviously knows how to spell it but hit the wrong button on his keyboard. so in fact your the "genius" for not realising that

  • It's not grooss I bet u don't know what an ejaculation is u retarf

  • this is so gross but its funny still

  • Some of Dane Cook's work is fucking retarded but some of it is pure genius.

  • dude

    i would like sex

    regardless of condom usage or not

    it's so insensitive to complain about that

    im gonna go neck up

  • Ohmigodd!!... I'm gonna EJACULATE 

    ROFL!!!!

  • real fast stop yelling at dane for giving you a little brother......and dont sound like a girl defending him......he is funny, but some people hate comedy,people,america,jesus, oh but love satan,hell,Antarctica, neptune, meteorites

  • @ReneNorth ok i have to admit i dont believe in god (im a science kid :/) but i do love people, comedy and america and im wanting to go to Germany visit my dads side homeland!

  • cloakin deviced-condoms.....(Y) thumbs up

  • pause...comma...ejaculation...­period...hopefully.

    HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH­a

  • FML. just fml. I spend frieking FOREVER trying to find ONE dang comment when everyone is arguing. Cuz I'm not gonna lie I like to read people getting mad. I'm American.lol. But , I can never find that one stupid comment that people post that gets everyone soo mad. I mean like sometimes I wonder do people like scroll through the wholee comment thing to be like ef that guy so people like me search FOREVER to find it!! I mean am I the only one here?!

  • @IxWuvxYewx Actually your not haha... I just give up after a while :D

  • @IxWuvxYewx haha no no you aren't =)

  • @IxWuvxYewx i love reading hate comments too. it get so damn intense its like"woow"

  • what's with the security guys staring at the audience how could you laugh seeing a guy with adrenalin pumping to see if he needs to worry about tackling you to the ground if you stand up & clap or something

  • lmfao bad pancakes! xD

  • he was the rip in the condom

  • lol....bad pancake......

  • @ookkeedookkee fucked hismom so hard, that blood came out and he went to the bathroom and it didnt stop, and it became very painful so he called the paramedics and asked what he should do, so they advised him to see his doctor right away, so he called his doctor, and his doctor found an opening on the same day, so he went to the doctor

  • lol period...hopefully XD

  • @ookkeedookkee your a bitch

  • You people need to get a life....really

  • sexist AND religious...what a surprise, and what a perfect recipe for comedy!

    Ooh, and I'm guessing that if you're a fan of his, you might not spot sarcasm, so er... that was it.

  • I wish I was there.

  • freaking funny!

  • period, hopefully xDxDxDxDxD!!!

  • @ImBallinLike23 e ME 2 ITS SO DUMB WHEN PEOPLE CORRECT PEOPLES GRAMMER

  • Comment removed

  • @ookkeedookkee dope

  • @ookkeedookkee Seriously don't do that, your talking that to be a smart-ass :/ sorry its a sad truth

  • @ookkeedookkee Dane Cook was just talking about ejaculation and sex and you are trying to tell us about proper grammar? hahaha

  • @ookkeedookkee How long did it take you to look up all those words on Dictionary (dot) com? Lol

  • Sir, considering your passion for the correct use of proper English grammar, as well as your use of formal styling and vocabulary, do you not perhaps think that, in keeping with said formal styling, that the conjunction "it's" may perhaps be somewhat inappropriate to use in your argument? Perhaps you should instead use the phrase, "it is".

    Also sir, the use of proper grammar is no substitute for lack of higher manners. I merely point this out for your well being, sir.

    Farewell, and thank you.

  • @ZomBLord shuuuuuuuuut the fuck up. you checked and checked again to see if you had any mistakes? get the fuck outa here. no one cares.

  • @ZomBLord ahahahaa look at this bitch tryina act like his higher up or sumfin typing like that... NOBODY CAME TO READ COMMENTS ON UR FUCKING SHIT ASS ARGUMENTS GET A FUCKING ROOM THIS IS DANE COOKS TERRITORY!@

  • @mysticowner4 lol i was being sarcastic. Look at the comment I was responding to.

  • @ZomBLord dont care u contributed to the argument

  • @mysticowner4 OK.

  • @ZomBLord Wow, grammar Nazi. I know I am reasponding to a nine month old comment. I am, not I'm.

  • @Bullfr0g174 I was being sarcastic. Look at the comment I was responding to. Cheers!

  • @ZomBLord OK TEACHER!! ILL STUDY HARDER

  • @ZomBLord you are awesome.

  • @ookkeedookkee While you're doing that, along with trying to use your vocabulary to make you sound like a pretentious fool... I obviously get what you're saying about means of communication. But when someone is commenting on a video and you can't understand, then don't go out of your way to start a fight with someone. Just leave it alone.

  • I honestly laughed out loud at myself when I reread what I had written. The paragraph is clearly written to sound as obnoxious as possible. I was in a very unusual mood when I wrote it so I apologize to those who took offense. There's enough animosity in this world as it is. There's no need to add to it by demeaning others for the sake of blowing off steam. Feel free to call me an asshole a few more times, but maybe conversations can now return to a more relevant topic.

  • @ookkeedookkee

    "...maybe conversations can now return to a more relevant topic"

    Relevant topics of conversation on an internet comment board? Lady you need to get out of your house.

  • O.O dude its just a spelling error you dont need to spaz at the other guy. DUDE SERIOUSLY...