Anyone knows how to tell if you have Asperger's or schizophrenia? Can you have both at the same time.....? What about dramatic mood swings....? Could it be bipolar? Is that even possible....? Any advice, please.....?
I've always wondered what it's like to be a person without severe ADHD, Tics and OCD...In school everyone REALLY wanted to know. "What the hell goes on in that kids head?!" Kid being me. Just like I wonder what it's like to not have what I have.
Mean average intelligence needs some allowances made if you have a high functioning intelligence. You are being kind to them to allow you to socialise and acrue the benefits from it. However when you get to 50 or so socialising will become less sought as you see the low returns from it, sometime it can bring you people you wish you handn't met.
So we compensate less or not at all for those we want to discourage that we find un stimulating.
I have this, it's simple, Autism is not a curse, it is a blessing...a gift, most refuse to believe it as such. It is easier to call something disabling because giving up on something is easier them working through it.
All you really have to do is understand your gift and learn to use it to empower your spirit. You'll find the life you currently wish and dream for.
I have autism and it absolutely does not limit me, once I figured out the gift, making friends was not difficult.
Simple, a few social traits are given up, but on a few specific subject your mind runs in overdrive, your able to think way beyond where most people can is a very short amount of time on that subject.
On those subjects with that kind of brain power, amazing thing can be invented.
Has anyone else with AS done drugs like Ecstasy and weed to act normal. LSD and meth just make me delusional but ecstasy (MDMA) feels really good. I get drunk a lot when I go out to meet women in bars and clubs it helps me to act normal. Shakespeare once said the world is a stage and the men and women on it are players.
interesting to hear from someone with a different condition having similar issues, but with a completely different cause. I'm also doing a course on autism & it's been so helpful to hear from people on YouTube who have autism or whose children or grandchildren have autism. It gives you a more accurate picture of what it's like. Thank you for sharing your story. The only problem I had was that you were so quiet talking. The storm wasn't a problem, it was just the volume of your voice.
Thanks for sharing your story. Although I don't have autism, I kinda get what you mean about social interaction being tiring, I have chronic fatigue, which makes socialising tiring & after a while, I hit a wall where I just want to go home or to my room for peace & quiet because I'm so exhausted by it. I also have hypersensitivity, which as well as making certain things uncomfortable, results in numerous conversations going on in a room merging & I can't hear what someone's saying to me. It's...
Glad I've got to the this stage in life too and now sit back accepting my aspergers traits and given up on trying to "fit in" If you ask me the mental health disorder here is trying to "fit in to a supposedly normal society" is this just a western view ... Social Skills dont exist when you use substances of any kind. Indigenous peoples dont label we are one and accepted..
I just turned 50. I got so good at acting NT, that I've decided to "retire" from it. I like being myself better. There are certain social skills I developed that keep me from being rude or annoying etc. that are worth holding onto. But I don't mind people thinking I'm different, weird, quirky whatever anymore. I kinda get a kick out of it now that I'm older.
Anyone in here that is on the spectrum and is female, I would like to hear your take, your experiences with this, and what are you truly passionate about? . -sean-
@Sean021122 Where abouts is a '38' score on the spectrum? I could never do a vid like so many other Aspies .. I'm too damn shy. Like 'metallicstucco', I just don't try NOT to be me anymore .. recently, after giving a 'friend' correct info after they asked (regarding a flower, of all things!) I then got told that I was 'discrediting' them! For heaven's sake don't ask an Aspie for info if you don't want to know! Well, that's one thing that's followed me from school days -then it was the teachers!
I often times find myself acting normal unsuccessfully. However, I think "normal" is only a term branded by those who are unable to "correctly" categorize concepts. In other words, you can have a highly artistic person and a person who is not as artistic, but to brand one as "normal" is a very useless label, I think.
I have AS as well but again, as I said on the other video, please just turn the camera off, this is awul between the sound quality and the flatness to everything being said. If you can't make a video that comeplls someone or keeps their interest when they have what you have, you have a problem...
Normal what the hell is normal ... You are as normal as you want to think and feel act talk and be and dont worry about what other people think because they may have their own thoughts about whether they are normal in there world. In our indigenous group we dont label our children nor treat them any different. we learn from our environment the people we grow up and around with the social world we create for ourselves and the labels we want to put on everything. So what is normal.
@rainearoha Exactly. Noone should feel compelled to measure up to any nt's idea of normalcy. We need to be our own person. And not care what others think about it. If they like/accept us for that fine. If not, move on. I live by theis philosophy everyday.
I'm like a lot of people in their late twenties who were not diadnosed as a child, but my family definitely knew I wasn't 'normal' and not knowing really made it hard on me in retrospect. They hoped it was just a phase, my grandma thought it might be lunatism, etc...
I have to say that I am 'better' as I got older, but I think part of it comes from years of emulating people's reactions around me. But the turning point came when I met someone with aspergers and saw myself...
Ive never been diagnosed, but ive thought I might have aspergers. I decided not to get checked because I believe its irrelevant. Anyway, everything you said here resonated so deeply with. For example having to retrospectively realize that youll never be part of a normal, comfortable social interaction and form a meaningful bond. I dont know what this means for me either, but i hope you find as close to being happy as you can be.
This is me all over. I both love and hate parties. I am always so detached from the people in the room, but online, I am somebody. I enjoy Facebook for being able to bring me closer to my friends and family. It's just information, but that's how I like my sociality. Meeting these people at the store or at social gatherings, I really have no interest in how their baby can walk and talk, or how much works has been done in their car. But on Facebook, I can skip those silly things and get right to
I believe that aspergers can be a higher awareness or that one comes from or with the other. I am sort of self diagnosing myself as aspergers. For me I finally might have found a self explanation for my life. As a kd I was so sensitive and honest and took everything literally. This caused me to get made fun of. As you can guess, when the other kids were joking with me I took serious and deeply. I knew myself as a freak. I went from being happy and extroverted to anxious and introverted. I was t
The problems you describe sound more like anxiety to me, I've experienced the same things- but 'not knowing what to wear' is common in young adults/teens. Not knowing how people would react to what youre wearing is more on the autistic side.
Listen guy you are fine. Do not try to be anyone else but yourself. Most people are fucked up because they have been brainwashed and they think this is the way life is. They walk around pretending to be someone else, but guess what they don't even know they are pretending.You do my friend and you are a fine individual. You do not need to pretend to be part of the herd.Be unique there is nothing wrong with being unique, there is something wrong with pretending to be the same as everyone else.
if u havnt noticed, aspergers usually like to roll their eyeballs up when they're talking. the weird thing is i also do this around others, can't rly control it though
i work in customer service so i put on my game face to stay independent... there are days where i just dont have the energy to maintain in that environment
Define neurotypical... ''Having a normal (usual, ordinary) ability to process linguistic information and social cues; used especially as an antonym for autistic.''
i have felt like an outsider too and i have sensitivity to certain noises that is off the charts but i never thought i might have a condition until now so doing my homework.........better one on one too and at times have anxiety about being in social situtions
i have felt like an outsider too and i have sensitivity to certain noises that is off the charts but i never thought i might have a condition until now so doing my homework.........
ok dude, being social=being a fake person, that's my observation, dont feel bad that ur not into stuff like partying and drinking, it's the right thing to do anyways
Neurotypical is unfortunate phrase as logically speaking, EVERY human is neuro 'individual' or indeed neuro atypical. It must be difficult facing discrimination with Autism due to being in ownership of strong neuro diversity that many people cannot understand due to their brainwashing of believing people are 'average'. School is often a place where kids are filtered through the education system like robots on autopilot. If School taught diversity, Autistic children could be accepted with ease.
your living in hopelessness i can some how relate to what you talked about relating to not being social..i used to be shy as a kid at social events and a few years later im a whole other person..you can do, become and feel however you want if you really try, im a living proof and witness..also maybe the envoirment that you live in or the lifestyle you lead has you feeling this way like how your family may treat you like a charity case..start a new life and start over again its all in your head
Cont. from my last comment. Another drawback of "pretending to be normal", in my opinion, is the pretending part. I have all these diff. "personalities that I use in diff. social situations and it has become quite difficult to keep them seperatet from my "real" personality. Anyway my point is this "pretending to be normal" good skill to have but be careful, its stressful and stress will f*ck you up, even kill you...
yeah "pretending to be normal" is a good skill to have. However I have found that there are a few drawbacks. First of all I find it very stressful and the more I have to do it, the more the stress accumelates to the point where I am very stressed most of the time. Of course this is a very bad thing since, without going into detail here, the stress hormones can damage your long term memory and your ablility to learn new things. I have little to no memory dating further back than 1-2 years.
I've tried to act NT for my whole life and I usually fail, because since I don't understand why NTs do the things they do, and I imitate their behaviours anyway, they come out as exaggerations. Like when actors do parodies of people.
Please don't judge yourself so hard. It's not productive as you build up more of a negative connection with yourself, whilst trying to connect with others in a productive way. "A square peg in a round hole will not go"
i dont have asperger's, i have ADD (which i dont believe i have because i have no problem paying attention for a long period of time when im reading an interesting book!)
butttt i also sometimes feel like im pretending to be normal. so i can totally relate to you!
Just be your Aspie self. I did not realize that I COULD be myself until I was diagnosed. Learning that I was an Aspie allowed me to finally feel happy with myself. I wasn't a freak; I was a special person.
Just yesterday I was talking to a college student with autism. He told me that things changed for him when he started taking acting classes in high school, when he then learned how to act "normal." He's taken that outside the theater and learned how to "act normal" in public. I asked him if by acting normal for so long whether he felt as if he'd become more "normal" and he said to some degree he thought he had. What are your thoughts?
@KayLilley I worked at a Zumiez store at a mall . there were times when i would get good hrs and sell a lot of merchandise from being social. I have aspergers, it was ALL AN ACT! over time, it started to become me. But everytime there was a 1-2 week break where my manager who didn't like me, didnt give me hrs.I would have to re-learn my old strategies all over again, but slightly faster than the time before. its almost like an autopilot mode that would kick on. If thats how NT's feel im jealous.
@Twist3dNick to further elaborate, "THE ACT" Was being NT and social, picking up on social ques, and responding in a fast time. It was very very overwhelming and exahausting. my manager even gave me two nonstop weeks of hrs everyday during christmas sesion. i was also sick with a fever... guess what, i still made it, but after finding out i had to work on new yrs, i basically told them to FUCK OFF. just couldn't take it anymore, did everything 110% and still couldn't even be cut a damn break.
Thank you for sharing this. My brother has Aspergers, and it helps me better understand some of his experience. What is the name of the video you mention about a man working with his son? Thanks again.
Thank you for sharing this. My brother has Aspergers, and it helps me better understand some of his experience. What is the name of the video you mention about a man working with his son? Thanks again.
Thank you for sharing this. My brother has Aspergers, and it helps me better understand some of his experience. What is the name of the video you mention about a man working with his son? Thanks again.
Thank you for sharing this. My brother has Aspergers, and it helps me better understand some of his experience. What is the name of the video you mention about a man working with his son? Thanks again.
There are retarded kids and not retarded kis. The really retarded autistic kids, that's good but I want to mention when it is an excuse for people to raise thier kids like fools. Or unknowingly raised to be transgender. Why are more BOYS autistic? Becuase most parents dont want the world to see they put the soul of a girl in a boys body. I hate when these parents use the name of Autism to cover their, you could say, failure as a parent.
I'm sorry if you feel like you aren't part of a community. I had a similar, but different, experience. I avoided people for most of my life because I was afraid of being hurt. I felt okay for doing this, but I also felt sad that I had no friends or family. I'm socializing more now because I'm ready to. But, before I did this, I was comforted by the theory (and truth, in my opinion) that no matter whether you know it or not, you are a part of everyone. It's just a matter of seeing this.
Pls drop "neurotypical" label. It is inaccurate. Even the circuitry of twin brains is unique through each twin's different experience. The label "HFA/asperger" may be useful for directing ones goals within a social species, but it too is inherently false: a static noun trying to capture infinite dynamism. With the boom in HFA awareness, it's like left-handed people getting to stop writing righty. We have a like-community, some good dietary frameworks, but EVERYONE is atypical. No one is "NT".
a pretended to be a NT fur years defo no the answer. used to feel as if it was somthing to be ashamed of right through school ppl tryed to change me and a forgot how to be me for a while
@katycatcm Because of his disorder. It's a big waste, but not his fault. It's just something that happens. If we were a better society we would screen children from an early age and treat them for such problems. Being autistic you can have certain intellectual advantages but there is a lot of suffering caused by being absent from society.
how is gaving autism a waste? its very well possible to lead a fulfilling life without any friends whatsover, or just a handfull for that matter.
to autistics autism oftenly isnt a problem, seeing they grow up with it, its other people who fail to see them for the great people they can be (people like you amongst others) if they were simply listend too
@gamiezion First of all this guy doesn't have full blown autism just a mild version. I can tell he has some desire for interaction so your statement about living a fulfilling life without friends is just wrong. I'm not saying this guy is a bad person at all. Really the reason it's a waste is because he is a valuable member but unable have the social vehicle for it. Maybe it can change with more practice.
um, first of all i didnt watch the vid, so im sure what you said about him is true
secondly: i said without or just a handfull, sugesting that this guy (and alot of autistics) are outgoing, so really, you are the 1 thats wrong here, not me.
and thirdly, who says you need friends to spread intelligence?
when this guy finishes his degree he can share his views and insights with people who understand him and write a book to boot. if thats what he wants, again i have not watched the vid as its late
by the way im 13 now and i have legions of friends everywhere i go i think its all bullshit and is all in ur head just be careles about everything and youll be fine
i was diagnosted with ADHD when i was 4 and i think its all bullshit i am hyperactive and inttentive but from i hear is that ppl with ADHD r not social active but that is not my case thats why i think ADHD is bullshit. my psychologist thinks that i am a "narcissist" and so everyone tell me the same thing i dont know about the aspies cuz i never met one in person so maybe all of this is in ur head u need to stop worring 2 much
Why dont u just be yourself and not worry what the world thinks? Wouldn't you be a happier person? So plz explain do u not wish to socialize? Are there certain kinds of people u do like to hang out with?
First of all I have not been officially diagnosed with AS. Regardless, nearly every symptom applies to me in some way.
It feels to me like AS does grant a degree of indifference to social constructs of normality. I feel like it is very liberating when perceived this way. However, it is hard to be indifferent to social norms and be a popular/charismatic person.
I agreed with a lot of what Bumsen said. I am able to replicate normal social interaction, but not maintain it.
I stopped going mainly not getting invited to parties a ong time ago, just don't go lazy man, seriously it fucks up ur academia, as an aspie u need to go into uni degree course work, minimse ur problems decrease the ignorance around u
what's up with the disclaimer at the end? I don't think there's anything wrong about this and I think a lot (if not all) of people with autism do this. we have to do this to cope with modern society.
I've been doing this for years. I hide myself in certain situations as I know I can be someone who is different to fit into the world a little better and for people to like who I am... people used to bully me, and thats why I changed. Autism has many gifts... and this is one of which some of us can use well :) I thought I was alone doing this until I seen this video.
I hope one day to be able to be myself in all situations. Its a work in progress :) 5*'s
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i suffered at my job at cvs with this. its like i was so unsure of myself. i would be so exausted on certain days where i could not say what i wanted to say
yeah. it's like you invest more energy in wearing that mask of being social like anyone else then actual work. and when you're already exhausted you can't bring up the energy to do that.
people rely heavily on alcohol to help oil the social gears at parties, it seems like you were probably sober among a majority that was drinking. while its problematic to rely on alcohol as a tool for being social, it may be worth it to experience this social bonding on occasions. it can take the edge off your sense of alienation.
Hi, wish I could have heard the end of your video - it looks like it was truncated.... anyway I like your last few sentences, and I can relate to what you are saying, even though I am probably somewhere in between NT and Aspie. I often feel like I need to analyze my every move in a social situation, but over the years I have developed some repertoire of small talk and recently working on improving my eye contact. Anyway, thank you for making this video.
I wont go in to detail because I dont need to but I feel the same and am finding it hard to be normal....I,m tierd....exhausted and drained and alone. But that is my life and I have to find the energy to carry on some how. I know energy comes from love.... to succeed in social interaction gves me the greatest energy. or is it that I seldom feels its joy ...that when I do it can sometimes feel euphoric.
Really? How do you find it to be depressing? Im not sure I understand?
I could also be seen as inspirational, as fighting to achieve something, if that somethings is just confidence is self, and accepting and loving being different. That would be a positive, wouldnt it?
Yeah, Yeah, I was in a bookstore the other day and talked to someone for 3 minutes in "faux-NT" then was drained, went over to hide in the books and they approached me again not sooner after to talk again and I was a total different person.
I don't understand what you mean by "normal", you seem pretty average to me.? Lots of people i know dont show expression even when they are excited. Thats just how they are. What makes you feel like you are not normal?
how do we know what high functioning is? Im not sure we even know where the middle of the spectrum is? I think its very hard to say anything about this. Also, there is no official criteria to determine what what abilities need to be present for a person to be considered high functioning
this video is the perfect example, whether or not it's meant to be, of how we over-analyze or over-think everything. How our mind jumps from one aspect to another.
How all factors play apart but we seek out details rather than the 'big' picture. Quite beautifully said.
I have High Functioning Autism and I feel that whenever I go to school, I have to put on a mental cloak to hide the fact that I'm different. Oddly enough though, I have a lot of control over when I can drop the illusion to make friends with somebody or not. Also it doesn't seem taxing, it feels like relief when I put it on.
Thanks for making this video. i do sort of the same thing in social situations. I pretend to fit in as best i can, but i always feel kind of like an observer, like i'm not as much a part of what's going on as everyone else. I've learned over the years what to do in most situations in a social or work setting but none of it comes naturally .
My son is a mild autistic and if he was to grow up and think and speak like you I would be very thankful. Trust me, you are better than many people I know. WIshing you best of luck =)
ok, this is gonna sound crazy, but here goes, i'm an aspie right, but if people who didn't know that looked me in the face for the first time they would think i was normal. is that weird?
not crazy at all Stephie. I was recently diagnosed with Asperger's (i am 44) and people in my family even had trouble believing it until i pointed out certain things to them and then they said "oh yeah". We look the same as everyone else on the outside, so people think we are "normal" and don't realize that we are kind of living in two different worlds, never completely in one or the other.
@Stephie2007 Not at all. I'm Aspie myself, as is my 11 year old son. I went years without being diagnosed because, at first glance, I appear so "normal." But hang around me long enough, and my AS tendencies become quite apparent.
This is for all your videos...they are helping me as a mother to understand so much of what is going on in my son's head. Thank you for doing the talking he cannot seem to come up with. My heart has broken for him as he strugles to understand how people fit into his life and how to connect, even why he should try to connect. But when he makes it, when a girl talks to him or someone gets his joke!!! That's the best!
i would hate to be what they call "normal", its only another word for everage. and i think most people would agree that being "normal" (average) wouldnt be to fun. although all the social anxiety and just anxiety in general isnt always fun, i feel its better than being "normal" (normal is boring anyway)
Hello! I have asperger's syndrome but i think not many people are normal because normal people wouldent be hyper? Normal people wouldent mess around like fo example, robbing, graffiti but you cant be normal, but i understand what your saying rated 5 + Subscribed!
My mind has been my biggest enemy, things like social anxiety are NT traits that occur for split seconds then they get over it, we would experience it constantly and intensivley. Once we can eliminate the garbage in the mind, and control the mind, then we progress as people. So far most Aspergers "sufferers" have not been able to have clear and attentive minds, once they have clear minds free of the ego then they can really explain and understand things that even the most "intelligent" can not.
Its important to understand that we are different, and when we fail we become abnormal, when we succeed we become extra-normal. NT's need all sorts of social rules which have developed genetically, otherwise they are inherrently selfish beings. Since we have to actually figure out how we communicate to others, we have profound freedome to choose how we interact, something that NT's rarely have control over. We must learn the way that offers least resistance but maintains our integrity as indvual
I completely object to your views on "NT mind". Such generalizations will not do any good to either "side" in the long run. What I find less inspiring about some aspies is their need to redefine neurotypicality as something inherently inferior in pretty much all aspects that are considered noteworthy. Such tendencies to classify people socially are what I would usually consider the less flattering, yet likely idiosyncratic characteristics of these very neurotypicals that you speak of.
You're right, but one shouldn't allow an obviously incompetent party to define the rules of the game and then comply with them instead of taking a wider and more insightful perspective than that which the other party evidently holds. You don't educate people by echoing close-minded gibberish.
I don't think I understand. What exactly is the difference in opinion here? That I would object to forming a habit of being voluntarily narrow-minded and isolationist as a response to the unrefined opinions of a select few that unfortunately do the same towards you? What will that achieve? Will it get the point across to the rest of them (who don't necessarily exhibit same behavior)?
I am an NT who was once in a relationship with an Aspie. Neither of us knew it until close to it's end, but we knew something was really off. What I want to emphasize is that it's not easy being NT, either. We all struggle. There are isolated NTs, scared, inhibited NTs, NTs who feel on top of it. Those of us who care about others also have to actually figure out how to communication to others. Kindness is important. At least it is to me.
I have figured out that sometimes I have this "urge to talk" and simply if I always ignore every single urge to talk, and then only talk instantaneously (i.e. "it just comes out naturally without thinking") then things are ok. Its sort of like when there is no emotional stimulus for talking, then I speak from my true self, and then I am neither normal or abnormal. I have reached a level of personal awareness where I feel like I know NT's better than they know themselves, simply because im diff.
i related to absolutely everything in this video (i was very recently diagnosed with AS at 29 yrs of age)...it's very comforting to know that there really are others out there who "get it", and that i am not the freak that i thought i was growing up....and that maybe it is alright to be different, after all.....also, you're a cutey ;) too bad you're on the other side of the planet :(
Social cues and socially normal behavour is stupid. If you consider normal to be drunken idiots going round swearing about absuing each other. Neurotypicals can keep it - they blow ass i like me the way I am if it were'nt for my aspergers i wouldn't have been unique. Just another Burberry or Nike clad sheep listening to and watching the same bullshit and keeping up the same social facade to impress so called "friends" like all the kids to thse days.
I will never be normal. Normal blows. Normal today consists of joining a gang, listening to inane two note R n B rap bullshit and playing with mobile phones incessantly. Screw that I got a mind of my own.
I have the same experience as described in your clip, and the txt comment below. Very very draining, and only worth putting on the act in situations where you have to smooth things over. I used to do it 24/7 and it was making me break down, now I'm diagnosed my whole personality is adapting to not having to put on the act, and my body is getting healthier, and I cant really bring myself to act any more. Its been so empowering.
i agree, its very drainng. i've developed this coping mechanism without knowing i had AS, and know feel severely depressed because of it. it also feels, however, that i'm wasting away, trying to be someone i'm not.
i think i have not learn't that pretending to live like someone your not, may achieve momentary feelings of normalcy (for the briefest of moments) but is dangerous in encouraging further depression, and diverting from your true stimulants, or 'special interests'
I've been diagnosed with Aspergers(Bunch of BS). I don't act a thing like a person with Aspergers! Sadly, in my Freshmen year(Which was last year, I'm gonna be a Sophmore), I had to be in a whole class of Aspergers kids, and because of that class, I was POSITIVE that I don't have Aspergers. None of my friends belive it ethier.
But really, I think that it IS possible for somebody with Aspergers or Autism(Depending on how mild it is), to overcome that disorder.
Good to hear that, lots of "Aspergers" suffers are becoming spoilt by all the attention in western schooling. When I grew up I was told directly I was not normal and I learnt to become much stronger than most Aspergers "sufferers". The main thing is I have overcome my own delusional sense that I deserve special treatment, because I respect others free choice to treat me however they want to.
Well stated. There are some who definitely need help, but there are some who should try to learn on their own. Maybe a counselor rather than an aide would be better in some cases.
accommodating the different needs of an autistic/asperger is not special treatment, but equal treatment in that it creates an environment where neither the AS nor the NT is at a disadvantage to perform to their ability... for example, allowing a work environment for the autistic/AS away from social and sensory overload if it helps them concentrate on analytical work... sure we make adaptions over time, but we still are prone to non-NT anxieties in ways that can be positively accommodated
Fair enough, but this "bidirectional adaptation" is really much too easy to blow out of proportion. Everyone is unique, everyone has preferences in their ways of learning things. There are not enough resources to fulfill everyone's special needs. What I'm a bit dumbfounded from is how people with Asperger's take care to mention that it's a *spectrum* disorder, yet they often seem to dismiss the fact that neurotypicality as a spectrum encompasses at least the same extent of diversity.
I know this because I have difficulties learning in class, not least due to the fact that I'm not being taught exclusively. I need much more attention from the teacher, not because I "want special treatment" (I'm well past that), but because I mostly approach things from different than "the standard" angle, so I simply have too many questions at every possible point in the learning progress. When part of a group this frustrates me because I know in order to keep up I'd have to slow others down.
i have aspergers and i refer to neurotypicality as a spectrum on my profile... aspergers is recognised as a disability because of the particular spectrum on which it belongs and the difficulties it causes in work situations etc designed by the NT majority for the NT majority... i also experience the specific difficulties you refer to in class situations, which is why i learn better from books, and more books if the original books don't answer all my questions
Oh, I should have known better and care to take a brief look at your profile before posting. Often I do. However, I think my comment is still called for generally, because I quite frequently encounter feelings of antipathy against NT's as if they were a solid, homogenous group of people filling a stereotypical niche. The educational system and many other structures of the society are designed with this average person in mind, but in a way that is justified given that they represent the majority.
Other than that, I completely sympathize with your frustration over the fact that the world is sometimes exclusively designed for "the typical". I'm pretty sure that designing the world for this imagined group as the majority is merely based on naïve misconceptions due to general blindness of *any* given person to acknowledge subjective reality other than their own. I'd guess the educational system is effective only for a fair minority, whereas the rest manage to cope with it just sufficiently.
i agree generally, but it is a matter of degree... providing a more private workspace for somebody with AS is like providing a wheelchair ramp for somebody in a wheelchair... it can make the difference to them being able to continue in a job that they are able to do... in the UK at least, discrimination law recognises AS for the social disability that it is in society as it is, because so many on the autistic spectrum (inc AS) aren't otherwise able to keep work, let alone fulfill their potential
I think the applicable word you mentioned is BS. Bro you should relax into yourself and at most not induce panic among the NTs :) NTs will "thin slice" you are different subconsciously at least in seconds. They are just being polite or confused enough not to bring the issue up. Whatever perceived gain you think is in the game, it isn't worth the stress and physical damage to your body of running NT emulation unnecessarily. You carry a heavy load. It is okay to let go.
I've honestly never had this problem, and i dont think an autistic person really knows what "normal"
Davebg2 3 hours ago
you dont have much autism if you try to be normal,since you dont understand how non-autistic people work.
Davebg2 12 hours ago
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appreciate you making this video. thank you :)
sketchyou 1 day ago
its almost like you're talking about my mind. feels good not to be alone with these thoughts :-)
MmoStore 2 days ago 2
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Anyone knows how to tell if you have Asperger's or schizophrenia? Can you have both at the same time.....? What about dramatic mood swings....? Could it be bipolar? Is that even possible....? Any advice, please.....?
erewrwify 3 days ago
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I've always wondered what it's like to be a person without severe ADHD, Tics and OCD...In school everyone REALLY wanted to know. "What the hell goes on in that kids head?!" Kid being me. Just like I wonder what it's like to not have what I have.
InfurnusChaotix 1 week ago
Its not a lie
Mean average intelligence needs some allowances made if you have a high functioning intelligence. You are being kind to them to allow you to socialise and acrue the benefits from it. However when you get to 50 or so socialising will become less sought as you see the low returns from it, sometime it can bring you people you wish you handn't met.
So we compensate less or not at all for those we want to discourage that we find un stimulating.
MPAcopy 2 weeks ago
I have this, it's simple, Autism is not a curse, it is a blessing...a gift, most refuse to believe it as such. It is easier to call something disabling because giving up on something is easier them working through it.
All you really have to do is understand your gift and learn to use it to empower your spirit. You'll find the life you currently wish and dream for.
I have autism and it absolutely does not limit me, once I figured out the gift, making friends was not difficult.
mythril4 3 weeks ago
@mythril4 how did u figure the gift? and what is it?
gummynumberone 2 weeks ago
@gummynumberone
Simple, a few social traits are given up, but on a few specific subject your mind runs in overdrive, your able to think way beyond where most people can is a very short amount of time on that subject.
On those subjects with that kind of brain power, amazing thing can be invented.
mythril4 2 weeks ago
I feel like that but never got diagnosed.... I dunno if I should though.
malaihiboi 3 weeks ago
Has anyone else with AS done drugs like Ecstasy and weed to act normal. LSD and meth just make me delusional but ecstasy (MDMA) feels really good. I get drunk a lot when I go out to meet women in bars and clubs it helps me to act normal. Shakespeare once said the world is a stage and the men and women on it are players.
dinamo4889 1 month ago
interesting to hear from someone with a different condition having similar issues, but with a completely different cause. I'm also doing a course on autism & it's been so helpful to hear from people on YouTube who have autism or whose children or grandchildren have autism. It gives you a more accurate picture of what it's like. Thank you for sharing your story. The only problem I had was that you were so quiet talking. The storm wasn't a problem, it was just the volume of your voice.
SuperMissblueeyes 1 month ago
Thanks for sharing your story. Although I don't have autism, I kinda get what you mean about social interaction being tiring, I have chronic fatigue, which makes socialising tiring & after a while, I hit a wall where I just want to go home or to my room for peace & quiet because I'm so exhausted by it. I also have hypersensitivity, which as well as making certain things uncomfortable, results in numerous conversations going on in a room merging & I can't hear what someone's saying to me. It's...
SuperMissblueeyes 1 month ago
Glad I've got to the this stage in life too and now sit back accepting my aspergers traits and given up on trying to "fit in" If you ask me the mental health disorder here is trying to "fit in to a supposedly normal society" is this just a western view ... Social Skills dont exist when you use substances of any kind. Indigenous peoples dont label we are one and accepted..
rainearoha 1 month ago
I just turned 50. I got so good at acting NT, that I've decided to "retire" from it. I like being myself better. There are certain social skills I developed that keep me from being rude or annoying etc. that are worth holding onto. But I don't mind people thinking I'm different, weird, quirky whatever anymore. I kinda get a kick out of it now that I'm older.
metallicstucco 1 month ago
This was like looking in the mirror. Thanks for sharing.
Kletuskassidy 1 month ago
Anyone in here that is on the spectrum and is female, I would like to hear your take, your experiences with this, and what are you truly passionate about? . -sean-
Sean021122 1 month ago
@Sean021122 Where abouts is a '38' score on the spectrum? I could never do a vid like so many other Aspies .. I'm too damn shy. Like 'metallicstucco', I just don't try NOT to be me anymore .. recently, after giving a 'friend' correct info after they asked (regarding a flower, of all things!) I then got told that I was 'discrediting' them! For heaven's sake don't ask an Aspie for info if you don't want to know! Well, that's one thing that's followed me from school days -then it was the teachers!
NoDraMuzz 1 month ago
I often times find myself acting normal unsuccessfully. However, I think "normal" is only a term branded by those who are unable to "correctly" categorize concepts. In other words, you can have a highly artistic person and a person who is not as artistic, but to brand one as "normal" is a very useless label, I think.
ArcadeChameleon 2 months ago
I have AS as well but again, as I said on the other video, please just turn the camera off, this is awul between the sound quality and the flatness to everything being said. If you can't make a video that comeplls someone or keeps their interest when they have what you have, you have a problem...
Sean021122 2 months ago
Are there audio problems with every fucking video involving asperger's :)?
Sean021122 2 months ago
@Sean021122 probably Google's NTs having a troll day
electricuniverse87 2 months ago
Normal what the hell is normal ... You are as normal as you want to think and feel act talk and be and dont worry about what other people think because they may have their own thoughts about whether they are normal in there world. In our indigenous group we dont label our children nor treat them any different. we learn from our environment the people we grow up and around with the social world we create for ourselves and the labels we want to put on everything. So what is normal.
rainearoha 2 months ago
@rainearoha Exactly. Noone should feel compelled to measure up to any nt's idea of normalcy. We need to be our own person. And not care what others think about it. If they like/accept us for that fine. If not, move on. I live by theis philosophy everyday.
Sean021122 1 month ago
I'm like a lot of people in their late twenties who were not diadnosed as a child, but my family definitely knew I wasn't 'normal' and not knowing really made it hard on me in retrospect. They hoped it was just a phase, my grandma thought it might be lunatism, etc...
I have to say that I am 'better' as I got older, but I think part of it comes from years of emulating people's reactions around me. But the turning point came when I met someone with aspergers and saw myself...
ThePinkHeel 2 months ago
Ive never been diagnosed, but ive thought I might have aspergers. I decided not to get checked because I believe its irrelevant. Anyway, everything you said here resonated so deeply with. For example having to retrospectively realize that youll never be part of a normal, comfortable social interaction and form a meaningful bond. I dont know what this means for me either, but i hope you find as close to being happy as you can be.
otherside65 2 months ago
This is me all over. I both love and hate parties. I am always so detached from the people in the room, but online, I am somebody. I enjoy Facebook for being able to bring me closer to my friends and family. It's just information, but that's how I like my sociality. Meeting these people at the store or at social gatherings, I really have no interest in how their baby can walk and talk, or how much works has been done in their car. But on Facebook, I can skip those silly things and get right to
setsunasamachan 3 months ago
I believe that aspergers can be a higher awareness or that one comes from or with the other. I am sort of self diagnosing myself as aspergers. For me I finally might have found a self explanation for my life. As a kd I was so sensitive and honest and took everything literally. This caused me to get made fun of. As you can guess, when the other kids were joking with me I took serious and deeply. I knew myself as a freak. I went from being happy and extroverted to anxious and introverted. I was t
DjCosmicRush 3 months ago
The problems you describe sound more like anxiety to me, I've experienced the same things- but 'not knowing what to wear' is common in young adults/teens. Not knowing how people would react to what youre wearing is more on the autistic side.
seeriktus 3 months ago
Im mild AS but i still dont understand how you fake being normal for so long
how do you learn to get that hour or minutes of feeling socially right
how do you learn to get that feel of "master social interaction" and all
sickassegal 4 months ago
Listen guy you are fine. Do not try to be anyone else but yourself. Most people are fucked up because they have been brainwashed and they think this is the way life is. They walk around pretending to be someone else, but guess what they don't even know they are pretending.You do my friend and you are a fine individual. You do not need to pretend to be part of the herd.Be unique there is nothing wrong with being unique, there is something wrong with pretending to be the same as everyone else.
Dracenfelz 4 months ago
YES! I have Autism..But it's eating me alive...I just want to be "Normal" :(
tomanynewbies9 5 months ago
WE ALL PRETEND WE'RE SOMETHING WE'RE NOT, SO KEEP GOING PLAYA.
webguy943 6 months ago
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hahaha this fucker is retarded haha autism!
90talisten 7 months ago
if u havnt noticed, aspergers usually like to roll their eyeballs up when they're talking. the weird thing is i also do this around others, can't rly control it though
buttercado 7 months ago
Great and very inspiring video, my friend.
HypersonicWave 7 months ago
i work in customer service so i put on my game face to stay independent... there are days where i just dont have the energy to maintain in that environment
76nikeblue 8 months ago
Define neurotypical... ''Having a normal (usual, ordinary) ability to process linguistic information and social cues; used especially as an antonym for autistic.''
djtimmy90 11 months ago
i have felt like an outsider too and i have sensitivity to certain noises that is off the charts but i never thought i might have a condition until now so doing my homework.........better one on one too and at times have anxiety about being in social situtions
msmra23 1 year ago
i have felt like an outsider too and i have sensitivity to certain noises that is off the charts but i never thought i might have a condition until now so doing my homework.........
msmra23 1 year ago
Ditto! I've always felt like an outsider even in my own family. The only being I have truely been able to love is my pet lizard.
PinkPunkyKat 1 year ago
Sorry but you are cute ...
1Diaaa 1 year ago
He is quite handsome, just sayin :)
meggydarling 1 year ago
drugs will help its the getting hooked thing pot REALLY HELPS
PhilMyBod41 1 year ago 3
I love what you have to say and how you express yourself; man you are so hot! :)
electronicoffee 1 year ago
ok dude, being social=being a fake person, that's my observation, dont feel bad that ur not into stuff like partying and drinking, it's the right thing to do anyways
Belieff3 1 year ago
Neurotypical is unfortunate phrase as logically speaking, EVERY human is neuro 'individual' or indeed neuro atypical. It must be difficult facing discrimination with Autism due to being in ownership of strong neuro diversity that many people cannot understand due to their brainwashing of believing people are 'average'. School is often a place where kids are filtered through the education system like robots on autopilot. If School taught diversity, Autistic children could be accepted with ease.
thx1138mindlock 1 year ago
ahh...i just relieved myself :)
thedeadgirlXVIII 1 year ago
your living in hopelessness i can some how relate to what you talked about relating to not being social..i used to be shy as a kid at social events and a few years later im a whole other person..you can do, become and feel however you want if you really try, im a living proof and witness..also maybe the envoirment that you live in or the lifestyle you lead has you feeling this way like how your family may treat you like a charity case..start a new life and start over again its all in your head
SerieOrtiz 1 year ago
Cont. from my last comment. Another drawback of "pretending to be normal", in my opinion, is the pretending part. I have all these diff. "personalities that I use in diff. social situations and it has become quite difficult to keep them seperatet from my "real" personality. Anyway my point is this "pretending to be normal" good skill to have but be careful, its stressful and stress will f*ck you up, even kill you...
srand911 1 year ago
yeah "pretending to be normal" is a good skill to have. However I have found that there are a few drawbacks. First of all I find it very stressful and the more I have to do it, the more the stress accumelates to the point where I am very stressed most of the time. Of course this is a very bad thing since, without going into detail here, the stress hormones can damage your long term memory and your ablility to learn new things. I have little to no memory dating further back than 1-2 years.
srand911 1 year ago
I'm just wondering what Neurotypical means? I keep asking what it means, but no one can really explain it to me.
Could you please explain it to me?
inyunaruto365 1 year ago 3
@inyunaruto365 NT, or Neurotypical, means a person of typical neurology, a "normal" person. Vs an autistic person, who is neurological atypical :)
NT= Normal
BumsenDK 1 year ago 4
@BumsenDK whats wrong with normal vs unnormal?
egalmannen 1 year ago
@inyunaruto365 NT means your socially dynamic
malcolm9001 1 year ago
I've tried to act NT for my whole life and I usually fail, because since I don't understand why NTs do the things they do, and I imitate their behaviours anyway, they come out as exaggerations. Like when actors do parodies of people.
darkjumpy 1 year ago 8
Please don't judge yourself so hard. It's not productive as you build up more of a negative connection with yourself, whilst trying to connect with others in a productive way. "A square peg in a round hole will not go"
blinkingblonde 1 year ago
You look a very sincere young man.
But please don't forget these "disorders" are not new.
These things were masked in men by the social doctrine that men were "The strong silent type"
Once you get under the layer of the silence, you will find many new age disorders are age old disorders.
As for not functioning well at gatherings.
Why do you think they invented alcohol?
blinkingblonde 1 year ago
Your description of what you go through was poetic. I identify very much with alot of what you talked about.
TheAliGonzo 1 year ago
i dont have asperger's, i have ADD (which i dont believe i have because i have no problem paying attention for a long period of time when im reading an interesting book!)
butttt i also sometimes feel like im pretending to be normal. so i can totally relate to you!
captainoats112 1 year ago
Just be your Aspie self. I did not realize that I COULD be myself until I was diagnosed. Learning that I was an Aspie allowed me to finally feel happy with myself. I wasn't a freak; I was a special person.
dyingofpoetry 1 year ago
Just yesterday I was talking to a college student with autism. He told me that things changed for him when he started taking acting classes in high school, when he then learned how to act "normal." He's taken that outside the theater and learned how to "act normal" in public. I asked him if by acting normal for so long whether he felt as if he'd become more "normal" and he said to some degree he thought he had. What are your thoughts?
KayLilley 1 year ago
@KayLilley I worked at a Zumiez store at a mall . there were times when i would get good hrs and sell a lot of merchandise from being social. I have aspergers, it was ALL AN ACT! over time, it started to become me. But everytime there was a 1-2 week break where my manager who didn't like me, didnt give me hrs.I would have to re-learn my old strategies all over again, but slightly faster than the time before. its almost like an autopilot mode that would kick on. If thats how NT's feel im jealous.
Twist3dNick 1 year ago
@Twist3dNick to further elaborate, "THE ACT" Was being NT and social, picking up on social ques, and responding in a fast time. It was very very overwhelming and exahausting. my manager even gave me two nonstop weeks of hrs everyday during christmas sesion. i was also sick with a fever... guess what, i still made it, but after finding out i had to work on new yrs, i basically told them to FUCK OFF. just couldn't take it anymore, did everything 110% and still couldn't even be cut a damn break.
Twist3dNick 1 year ago
@Twist3dNick Your feedback gives me good insight to have more discussion with my students who have autism or asperger's. Thank you.
KayLilley 1 year ago
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Thank you for sharing this. My brother has Aspergers, and it helps me better understand some of his experience. What is the name of the video you mention about a man working with his son? Thanks again.
TheRstoddard 1 year ago
Thank you for sharing this. My brother has Aspergers, and it helps me better understand some of his experience. What is the name of the video you mention about a man working with his son? Thanks again.
TheRstoddard 1 year ago
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Thank you for sharing this. My brother has Aspergers, and it helps me better understand some of his experience. What is the name of the video you mention about a man working with his son? Thanks again.
TheRstoddard 1 year ago
Thank you for sharing this. My brother has Aspergers, and it helps me better understand some of his experience. What is the name of the video you mention about a man working with his son? Thanks again.
TheRstoddard 1 year ago
You are so handsome!
muffsan94 1 year ago 9
There are retarded kids and not retarded kis. The really retarded autistic kids, that's good but I want to mention when it is an excuse for people to raise thier kids like fools. Or unknowingly raised to be transgender. Why are more BOYS autistic? Becuase most parents dont want the world to see they put the soul of a girl in a boys body. I hate when these parents use the name of Autism to cover their, you could say, failure as a parent.
Amerifunk85 1 year ago
i find it easier to ber in groups because then nobody can focus on me and realize that im not normal.
AntiVenomFangX 2 years ago
Pretending to be normal is exhausting! Be yourself and embrace your uniqueness. True friends will accept you just as you are.
dare2bdifferent1 2 years ago 2
Do you have an email address I can contact you at? I would love to talk to you more about all of this...
franknmag 2 years ago
Ill answer questions via youtube messages, but i do get a few msgs and may not be able to respond to all
BumsenDK 2 years ago
I'm sorry if you feel like you aren't part of a community. I had a similar, but different, experience. I avoided people for most of my life because I was afraid of being hurt. I felt okay for doing this, but I also felt sad that I had no friends or family. I'm socializing more now because I'm ready to. But, before I did this, I was comforted by the theory (and truth, in my opinion) that no matter whether you know it or not, you are a part of everyone. It's just a matter of seeing this.
anutuk 2 years ago
Pls drop "neurotypical" label. It is inaccurate. Even the circuitry of twin brains is unique through each twin's different experience. The label "HFA/asperger" may be useful for directing ones goals within a social species, but it too is inherently false: a static noun trying to capture infinite dynamism. With the boom in HFA awareness, it's like left-handed people getting to stop writing righty. We have a like-community, some good dietary frameworks, but EVERYONE is atypical. No one is "NT".
nowabisabi 2 years ago
a pretended to be a NT fur years defo no the answer. used to feel as if it was somthing to be ashamed of right through school ppl tryed to change me and a forgot how to be me for a while
MrFrewby 2 years ago
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Nice Glasses i mean spunk deflectors
BlacklistedL33t 2 years ago
you ARE attractive to the world. whyever would you think you aren't?
katycatcm 2 years ago
@katycatcm Because of his disorder. It's a big waste, but not his fault. It's just something that happens. If we were a better society we would screen children from an early age and treat them for such problems. Being autistic you can have certain intellectual advantages but there is a lot of suffering caused by being absent from society.
suckbar69 2 years ago
how is gaving autism a waste? its very well possible to lead a fulfilling life without any friends whatsover, or just a handfull for that matter.
to autistics autism oftenly isnt a problem, seeing they grow up with it, its other people who fail to see them for the great people they can be (people like you amongst others) if they were simply listend too
gamiezion 2 years ago
@gamiezion First of all this guy doesn't have full blown autism just a mild version. I can tell he has some desire for interaction so your statement about living a fulfilling life without friends is just wrong. I'm not saying this guy is a bad person at all. Really the reason it's a waste is because he is a valuable member but unable have the social vehicle for it. Maybe it can change with more practice.
suckbar69 2 years ago
um, first of all i didnt watch the vid, so im sure what you said about him is true
secondly: i said without or just a handfull, sugesting that this guy (and alot of autistics) are outgoing, so really, you are the 1 thats wrong here, not me.
and thirdly, who says you need friends to spread intelligence?
when this guy finishes his degree he can share his views and insights with people who understand him and write a book to boot. if thats what he wants, again i have not watched the vid as its late
gamiezion 2 years ago
christmas depresses me man, i hardly speak, i look forward to the holiday but not really interacting with my extended family
Bighairyfart 2 years ago
by the way im 13 now and i have legions of friends everywhere i go i think its all bullshit and is all in ur head just be careles about everything and youll be fine
TheCoolestKid15 2 years ago
i was diagnosted with ADHD when i was 4 and i think its all bullshit i am hyperactive and inttentive but from i hear is that ppl with ADHD r not social active but that is not my case thats why i think ADHD is bullshit. my psychologist thinks that i am a "narcissist" and so everyone tell me the same thing i dont know about the aspies cuz i never met one in person so maybe all of this is in ur head u need to stop worring 2 much
TheCoolestKid15 2 years ago
Seeing as you dont know me, or know any aspie, then id say your reaching.
Its VERY common to be socially active for people with ADHD, so I dont know how you got that into your head.
ADHD isnt all bad. Great Ideas, energy and perseverance are features of ADHD too.
BumsenDK 2 years ago 4
u´re sexy :)
clautrabajos 2 years ago
Why dont u just be yourself and not worry what the world thinks? Wouldn't you be a happier person? So plz explain do u not wish to socialize? Are there certain kinds of people u do like to hang out with?
kokonutbaby1 2 years ago
Im getting better at that, but is a slow process i think. As well as being a matter of personality.
BumsenDK 2 years ago
Just try that in a job and see how long you last. NTs have the same problem but Aspies have it turned to 11.
AnonGemini 2 years ago
First of all I have not been officially diagnosed with AS. Regardless, nearly every symptom applies to me in some way.
It feels to me like AS does grant a degree of indifference to social constructs of normality. I feel like it is very liberating when perceived this way. However, it is hard to be indifferent to social norms and be a popular/charismatic person.
I agreed with a lot of what Bumsen said. I am able to replicate normal social interaction, but not maintain it.
McBeaver00 2 years ago
I stopped going mainly not getting invited to parties a ong time ago, just don't go lazy man, seriously it fucks up ur academia, as an aspie u need to go into uni degree course work, minimse ur problems decrease the ignorance around u
Bighairyfart 2 years ago
what's up with the disclaimer at the end? I don't think there's anything wrong about this and I think a lot (if not all) of people with autism do this. we have to do this to cope with modern society.
skittb89 2 years ago
I Luv this video:)
luvebug21 2 years ago
great video :)
I've been doing this for years. I hide myself in certain situations as I know I can be someone who is different to fit into the world a little better and for people to like who I am... people used to bully me, and thats why I changed. Autism has many gifts... and this is one of which some of us can use well :) I thought I was alone doing this until I seen this video.
I hope one day to be able to be myself in all situations. Its a work in progress :) 5*'s
chris150389 2 years ago
thnx alot :)
there are alot of us there living like this. I did the opposite if you, I assumed all aspies did this :)
BumsenDK 2 years ago
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UniqueMJPT 2 years ago
Don't bother trying to be normal. I tried and ended up feeling false so I am just me and if ppl dont like it tough!!
lizichell 2 years ago
i suffered at my job at cvs with this. its like i was so unsure of myself. i would be so exausted on certain days where i could not say what i wanted to say
magmatic123 2 years ago
yeah. it's like you invest more energy in wearing that mask of being social like anyone else then actual work. and when you're already exhausted you can't bring up the energy to do that.
skittb89 2 years ago
Never be ashamed for the way your mind works. That alone will make you socially more comfortable (and less exhausting).
Most people are born with a social affinity and didn't have to work hard to acchieve it like we do, so it definately doesn't make them better.
More so, those who think they can pick on us are usually 'not the sharpest tools in the shed' (ie: stupid).
If you can't avoid them, trick them in a way 'they' cannot understand directly.
noxure 2 years ago 8
people rely heavily on alcohol to help oil the social gears at parties, it seems like you were probably sober among a majority that was drinking. while its problematic to rely on alcohol as a tool for being social, it may be worth it to experience this social bonding on occasions. it can take the edge off your sense of alienation.
herneyselan 2 years ago
Hi, wish I could have heard the end of your video - it looks like it was truncated.... anyway I like your last few sentences, and I can relate to what you are saying, even though I am probably somewhere in between NT and Aspie. I often feel like I need to analyze my every move in a social situation, but over the years I have developed some repertoire of small talk and recently working on improving my eye contact. Anyway, thank you for making this video.
rumblestrip66 2 years ago
I wont go in to detail because I dont need to but I feel the same and am finding it hard to be normal....I,m tierd....exhausted and drained and alone. But that is my life and I have to find the energy to carry on some how. I know energy comes from love.... to succeed in social interaction gves me the greatest energy. or is it that I seldom feels its joy ...that when I do it can sometimes feel euphoric.
hd2iou 2 years ago
This is terribly depressing.
sudnaidu 2 years ago
Really? How do you find it to be depressing? Im not sure I understand?
I could also be seen as inspirational, as fighting to achieve something, if that somethings is just confidence is self, and accepting and loving being different. That would be a positive, wouldnt it?
BumsenDK 2 years ago
Your message is perhaps informative.
sudnaidu 2 years ago
See, theres a positive :)
BumsenDK 2 years ago
Yeah, Yeah, I was in a bookstore the other day and talked to someone for 3 minutes in "faux-NT" then was drained, went over to hide in the books and they approached me again not sooner after to talk again and I was a total different person.
CactusRose33 2 years ago
I don't understand what you mean by "normal", you seem pretty average to me.? Lots of people i know dont show expression even when they are excited. Thats just how they are. What makes you feel like you are not normal?
serene528 2 years ago
how can you tell if an autistic child will become highfuctioning when he/she gets older?
serene528 2 years ago
how do we know what high functioning is? Im not sure we even know where the middle of the spectrum is? I think its very hard to say anything about this. Also, there is no official criteria to determine what what abilities need to be present for a person to be considered high functioning
BumsenDK 2 years ago
Hey Stevie, Id like to underline that its not what my life is about, its simply a thought that comes to mind every now and again.
BumsenDK 2 years ago
'morn the loss of something I've never had'
I say that to myself all the time, about the life I don't get to live.
VegetoStevieD 2 years ago
this video is the perfect example, whether or not it's meant to be, of how we over-analyze or over-think everything. How our mind jumps from one aspect to another.
How all factors play apart but we seek out details rather than the 'big' picture. Quite beautifully said.
nancyrellaallegro 2 years ago
I have High Functioning Autism and I feel that whenever I go to school, I have to put on a mental cloak to hide the fact that I'm different. Oddly enough though, I have a lot of control over when I can drop the illusion to make friends with somebody or not. Also it doesn't seem taxing, it feels like relief when I put it on.
booksaregreat24 3 years ago
Interesting. So you could keep it up indefinatly? thats pretty strong.
BumsenDK 3 years ago
Thanks for making this video. i do sort of the same thing in social situations. I pretend to fit in as best i can, but i always feel kind of like an observer, like i'm not as much a part of what's going on as everyone else. I've learned over the years what to do in most situations in a social or work setting but none of it comes naturally .
alancook01 3 years ago
Can't pick up on the vibe...
sudnaidu 2 years ago
My son is a mild autistic and if he was to grow up and think and speak like you I would be very thankful. Trust me, you are better than many people I know. WIshing you best of luck =)
falujaly 3 years ago
ok, this is gonna sound crazy, but here goes, i'm an aspie right, but if people who didn't know that looked me in the face for the first time they would think i was normal. is that weird?
Stephie2007 3 years ago 10
not crazy at all Stephie. I was recently diagnosed with Asperger's (i am 44) and people in my family even had trouble believing it until i pointed out certain things to them and then they said "oh yeah". We look the same as everyone else on the outside, so people think we are "normal" and don't realize that we are kind of living in two different worlds, never completely in one or the other.
alancook01 3 years ago
@Stephie2007 Not at all. I'm Aspie myself, as is my 11 year old son. I went years without being diagnosed because, at first glance, I appear so "normal." But hang around me long enough, and my AS tendencies become quite apparent.
EABeaudry 1 year ago
This is for all your videos...they are helping me as a mother to understand so much of what is going on in my son's head. Thank you for doing the talking he cannot seem to come up with. My heart has broken for him as he strugles to understand how people fit into his life and how to connect, even why he should try to connect. But when he makes it, when a girl talks to him or someone gets his joke!!! That's the best!
gentlehandsdoula 3 years ago
I am neurotypical and I prefer Aspie men. I think you are sexy, my dear.
usecori 3 years ago
You are oneee weird individual.
How many aspie men do you KNOW of to say that?
magicalorangutan 3 years ago
my guess would be this: enough.
BumsenDK 3 years ago
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
oldsouls1 3 years ago
i would hate to be what they call "normal", its only another word for everage. and i think most people would agree that being "normal" (average) wouldnt be to fun. although all the social anxiety and just anxiety in general isnt always fun, i feel its better than being "normal" (normal is boring anyway)
jugarnaut40 3 years ago
Hello! I have asperger's syndrome but i think not many people are normal because normal people wouldent be hyper? Normal people wouldent mess around like fo example, robbing, graffiti but you cant be normal, but i understand what your saying rated 5 + Subscribed!
UkPresents 3 years ago
My mind has been my biggest enemy, things like social anxiety are NT traits that occur for split seconds then they get over it, we would experience it constantly and intensivley. Once we can eliminate the garbage in the mind, and control the mind, then we progress as people. So far most Aspergers "sufferers" have not been able to have clear and attentive minds, once they have clear minds free of the ego then they can really explain and understand things that even the most "intelligent" can not.
sudnaidu 3 years ago 3
Its important to understand that we are different, and when we fail we become abnormal, when we succeed we become extra-normal. NT's need all sorts of social rules which have developed genetically, otherwise they are inherrently selfish beings. Since we have to actually figure out how we communicate to others, we have profound freedome to choose how we interact, something that NT's rarely have control over. We must learn the way that offers least resistance but maintains our integrity as indvual
sudnaidu 3 years ago 2
I completely object to your views on "NT mind". Such generalizations will not do any good to either "side" in the long run. What I find less inspiring about some aspies is their need to redefine neurotypicality as something inherently inferior in pretty much all aspects that are considered noteworthy. Such tendencies to classify people socially are what I would usually consider the less flattering, yet likely idiosyncratic characteristics of these very neurotypicals that you speak of.
CorneliusFractogram 3 years ago
I believe its a counter-reaction to the definition of autism to be something only defined by lack of skills and abilities.
BumsenDK 3 years ago
You're right, but one shouldn't allow an obviously incompetent party to define the rules of the game and then comply with them instead of taking a wider and more insightful perspective than that which the other party evidently holds. You don't educate people by echoing close-minded gibberish.
CorneliusFractogram 3 years ago
I respect your difference in opinion.
BumsenDK 3 years ago
I don't think I understand. What exactly is the difference in opinion here? That I would object to forming a habit of being voluntarily narrow-minded and isolationist as a response to the unrefined opinions of a select few that unfortunately do the same towards you? What will that achieve? Will it get the point across to the rest of them (who don't necessarily exhibit same behavior)?
CorneliusFractogram 3 years ago
I am an NT who was once in a relationship with an Aspie. Neither of us knew it until close to it's end, but we knew something was really off. What I want to emphasize is that it's not easy being NT, either. We all struggle. There are isolated NTs, scared, inhibited NTs, NTs who feel on top of it. Those of us who care about others also have to actually figure out how to communication to others. Kindness is important. At least it is to me.
charlottemina 3 years ago
I have figured out that sometimes I have this "urge to talk" and simply if I always ignore every single urge to talk, and then only talk instantaneously (i.e. "it just comes out naturally without thinking") then things are ok. Its sort of like when there is no emotional stimulus for talking, then I speak from my true self, and then I am neither normal or abnormal. I have reached a level of personal awareness where I feel like I know NT's better than they know themselves, simply because im diff.
sudnaidu 3 years ago
i related to absolutely everything in this video (i was very recently diagnosed with AS at 29 yrs of age)...it's very comforting to know that there really are others out there who "get it", and that i am not the freak that i thought i was growing up....and that maybe it is alright to be different, after all.....also, you're a cutey ;) too bad you're on the other side of the planet :(
starvingartist1979 3 years ago 2
Social cues and socially normal behavour is stupid. If you consider normal to be drunken idiots going round swearing about absuing each other. Neurotypicals can keep it - they blow ass i like me the way I am if it were'nt for my aspergers i wouldn't have been unique. Just another Burberry or Nike clad sheep listening to and watching the same bullshit and keeping up the same social facade to impress so called "friends" like all the kids to thse days.
Suck fest! Roger Whittaker rules!
lizichell 3 years ago 4
I will never be normal. Normal blows. Normal today consists of joining a gang, listening to inane two note R n B rap bullshit and playing with mobile phones incessantly. Screw that I got a mind of my own.
lizichell 3 years ago 4
I'm proud to be "unnormal"!
Hjernespreng 3 years ago 2
I have the same experience as described in your clip, and the txt comment below. Very very draining, and only worth putting on the act in situations where you have to smooth things over. I used to do it 24/7 and it was making me break down, now I'm diagnosed my whole personality is adapting to not having to put on the act, and my body is getting healthier, and I cant really bring myself to act any more. Its been so empowering.
bleepersweeper 3 years ago
i agree, its very drainng. i've developed this coping mechanism without knowing i had AS, and know feel severely depressed because of it. it also feels, however, that i'm wasting away, trying to be someone i'm not.
i think i have not learn't that pretending to live like someone your not, may achieve momentary feelings of normalcy (for the briefest of moments) but is dangerous in encouraging further depression, and diverting from your true stimulants, or 'special interests'
dannDP107 3 years ago
I've been diagnosed with Aspergers(Bunch of BS). I don't act a thing like a person with Aspergers! Sadly, in my Freshmen year(Which was last year, I'm gonna be a Sophmore), I had to be in a whole class of Aspergers kids, and because of that class, I was POSITIVE that I don't have Aspergers. None of my friends belive it ethier.
But really, I think that it IS possible for somebody with Aspergers or Autism(Depending on how mild it is), to overcome that disorder.
ilikenintendo2005 3 years ago
Good to hear that, lots of "Aspergers" suffers are becoming spoilt by all the attention in western schooling. When I grew up I was told directly I was not normal and I learnt to become much stronger than most Aspergers "sufferers". The main thing is I have overcome my own delusional sense that I deserve special treatment, because I respect others free choice to treat me however they want to.
sudnaidu 3 years ago
Well stated. There are some who definitely need help, but there are some who should try to learn on their own. Maybe a counselor rather than an aide would be better in some cases.
chessimprov2 3 years ago 2
accommodating the different needs of an autistic/asperger is not special treatment, but equal treatment in that it creates an environment where neither the AS nor the NT is at a disadvantage to perform to their ability... for example, allowing a work environment for the autistic/AS away from social and sensory overload if it helps them concentrate on analytical work... sure we make adaptions over time, but we still are prone to non-NT anxieties in ways that can be positively accommodated
ghodium 3 years ago
Fair enough, but this "bidirectional adaptation" is really much too easy to blow out of proportion. Everyone is unique, everyone has preferences in their ways of learning things. There are not enough resources to fulfill everyone's special needs. What I'm a bit dumbfounded from is how people with Asperger's take care to mention that it's a *spectrum* disorder, yet they often seem to dismiss the fact that neurotypicality as a spectrum encompasses at least the same extent of diversity.
CorneliusFractogram 3 years ago
I know this because I have difficulties learning in class, not least due to the fact that I'm not being taught exclusively. I need much more attention from the teacher, not because I "want special treatment" (I'm well past that), but because I mostly approach things from different than "the standard" angle, so I simply have too many questions at every possible point in the learning progress. When part of a group this frustrates me because I know in order to keep up I'd have to slow others down.
CorneliusFractogram 3 years ago
i have aspergers and i refer to neurotypicality as a spectrum on my profile... aspergers is recognised as a disability because of the particular spectrum on which it belongs and the difficulties it causes in work situations etc designed by the NT majority for the NT majority... i also experience the specific difficulties you refer to in class situations, which is why i learn better from books, and more books if the original books don't answer all my questions
ghodium 3 years ago
Oh, I should have known better and care to take a brief look at your profile before posting. Often I do. However, I think my comment is still called for generally, because I quite frequently encounter feelings of antipathy against NT's as if they were a solid, homogenous group of people filling a stereotypical niche. The educational system and many other structures of the society are designed with this average person in mind, but in a way that is justified given that they represent the majority.
CorneliusFractogram 3 years ago
Other than that, I completely sympathize with your frustration over the fact that the world is sometimes exclusively designed for "the typical". I'm pretty sure that designing the world for this imagined group as the majority is merely based on naïve misconceptions due to general blindness of *any* given person to acknowledge subjective reality other than their own. I'd guess the educational system is effective only for a fair minority, whereas the rest manage to cope with it just sufficiently.
CorneliusFractogram 3 years ago
i agree generally, but it is a matter of degree... providing a more private workspace for somebody with AS is like providing a wheelchair ramp for somebody in a wheelchair... it can make the difference to them being able to continue in a job that they are able to do... in the UK at least, discrimination law recognises AS for the social disability that it is in society as it is, because so many on the autistic spectrum (inc AS) aren't otherwise able to keep work, let alone fulfill their potential
ghodium 3 years ago
I think the applicable word you mentioned is BS. Bro you should relax into yourself and at most not induce panic among the NTs :) NTs will "thin slice" you are different subconsciously at least in seconds. They are just being polite or confused enough not to bring the issue up. Whatever perceived gain you think is in the game, it isn't worth the stress and physical damage to your body of running NT emulation unnecessarily. You carry a heavy load. It is okay to let go.
FocusedClarity 3 years ago
It is ok to let go. Sometimes.
but sometimes its ok to be the version of you, that most NTs are, when at a job interview :)
to me, in most situations, its absolutely worth the stress, but i will admit that im finding a few more scenarios now where i can drop it.
BumsenDK 3 years ago
He's the first guy I've related to. As much as I keep up with fashion, and NT tastes, it's impossible for me to completely interact with other NTs.
megamanxz1 3 years ago
i love you
MelonGroove 3 years ago
thnx, I do too ;P
BumsenDK 3 years ago
Sorry, a little from the subject, but you're cute! What a great accent that you have too -(I am from UK)
I hope this counts for a 'positive' comment!
spacemoo 3 years ago 2
absolutely ;) and thnx!
BumsenDK 3 years ago