Secret astronauts gently tell us about the Holy Trinity

[CONDUIT99PERCENT]

ZECHARIAH SITCHINS FACTS COATED BULLSHIT NOVELS IS BASIC TEXTBOOK FOR ILLUMINATI RECRUITS. TELLS OF ANUNAKI GODS USING NUCLEAR BOMBS: DOES NOT JIVE WITH FACTS. YOU NEED TO KNOW OPTICS TO ARRIVE AT E=MC2. YOU NEED GLASS TECHNOLOGY TO HAVE TELESCOPES TO STUDY OPTICS. ANUNAKI ALIEN GODS ARE BULL!!! THE SUMERIANS WERE ONLY USING ZIGGURAT ASTROLABES & STONEHENGE MEGALITHIC MARKER. IF THEY HAD NUCLEAR TECHNOLOGY THE MAYANS SHOULD HAVE THE WHEEL, AND THE SUMERIANS THEIR OPTICAL TELESCOPES. NO FIT!!??

[MsPlum5]

I grew up around republicans and secret astronauts.  Wait, what was I talking about!

[bloodypimpernel]

the history channel has a lot to answer for.

[effinTRAITOR]

This guy was fucking wrecked...

[amoney1019]

"I never said I believe in aliens dont put words in my mouth, I don't even believe in those aliens between borders, who's to say who was where 1st?" But then he believes in astronauts that will bring jesus in a spaceship down to earth

[fundslender]

They're gonna have to set a criteria for calling into the show. It's downright humorous at times.

[californiarednek]

Well it is an interesting theory...

[dominatorN4]

So how high was this guy?

[tellnet]

@dominatorN4

17 feet 4 inches

[whyiaskyou79]

"I was surrounded by republicans"

Well, that explains it...

[pburto]

@whyiaskyou79 Plenty of republican Atheists exist. I'm an atheist Libertarian who tends to vote republican (although not always) because: "tax less, spend less, do less" is what I like in a government.

[whyiaskyou79]

@pburto

Alright. Well, If you're going to play the 'there's are exceptions to everything' game, that's fine.

Of course there are some republican atheists.

Don't pretend like there aren't relationships between being theistic with being republican, as there are between being conservative and republican.

The vast majority of atheists I know (and know of) are liberal and vote democrat.

[whyiaskyou79]

@pburto

(2)

I also notice that most republicans tend to treat their label of 'republican' with the same sense of loyalty they do to their religious affiliation. Such that they are 'all or nothing republicans' in the same way they are '100% Christians', for example. Good for you for actually considering issues independently, without feeling an obligation to appease 'your team'.

[cr4yv3n]

"Breaking us in" by selling each culture a story that says everyone else must be killed in the name of a religion / story...

[blackacidlizzard]

Simple people look around at the world and come to the conclusion that people couldn't possibly have created something so fucked up; it must be demons, aliens, or some damn thing.

Those cursed with "a greater capacity for unhappiness," as Mencken called it, can see all too clearly that, no, you idiots are fully capable of, perhaps even inevitably driven to, fucking shit up this badly.

[SeedsOfHatred]

@blackacidlizzard Perhaps I'm only saying this aloud because I'm drunk, but that was beautifully put.

*Raises bottle* A drink to you, my good sir.

[ravenheart93]

"Who to say who was here first" "Doctor Who" lol

[yatter1]

"Breaking us in gently" for 2000 fucking years???

[audiotrax2000]

Dragonsnack73: Hey, you just described me! LOL

[ChipArgyle]

This caller doesn't sound particularly dangerous. Crazy, yes. Dangerous, no. As far as Christians go, he's probably benign.

[TheHigherVoltage]

@ChipArgyle crazy is dangerous.

[ChipArgyle]

@TheHigherVoltage Sometimes, not always.

[audiotrax2000]

One thing you have to wonder about: why does it sound like almost every one of the callers to this show are either drunk, or mildly retarded?

[Dragonsnack73]

@audiotrax2000 My girlfriend (not the smartest person in world, proven by the fact that she's dating me for 6 years) had an interesting theory about that: Most people that buy into all that nonsense (religious and otherwise televised nonsense like "secret astronauts" are deadbeats that don't have anything better to do at the time those shows air. "Normal" people are either at work or sleeping those hours, so only dimwits with no job and life are watching while they drown their sorrows ...

[bgiv2010]

DO NOT take the word "theory" lightly!

[SKELTER1SKELTER]

If dogs could talk they would sound just like this guy.

[Chinomareno]

Matt would have hung up straight away, this guy has to be fake.

[red666111]

ok, this guy has been sucked into the twilight zone...

[chicarbiomed]

WTF?! This guy is blowing my mind. Like, seriously listen to him and try to comprehend what he's talking about. I felt like my brain was oozing out of my ears from the sheer stupidity I was hearing.

[zcallen]

5:02 onward was hysterical

[TheDigitalStone]

5:30 I almost cry-laughed :p

[TheMogulmonster]

Where do they find these people.

[TheRipcity22]

This guy's right! I have tested this theory through a subjective like process and it works!

[Kailoa36]

This caller has no clue what a theory is.

[alienlifeform11]

Love Jen.

[Nabiki73]

People shouldn't call while smoking salvia.

[MyOldName]

I believe these astronauts came from other planets to-

So, aliens?

I don't believe in aliens! Don't put words in my mouth!

[MrApostleLee]

You don’t have a “Theory”. What you have is a piss poor hypothesis.

[greyeyed123]

Did anyone watch the "Ancient Aliens" episode yesterday? The whole show was about aliens making hybrid human/animal creatures thousands of years ago. How outrageous can these shows get before someone says...this must be a joke, right? It's like a weird sybiosis between audience and myth-maker; the more the audience wants something new and interesting to believe, the farther the myth-maker takes the boundaries of the myth.

[ARAFELI]

@greyeyed123 anytime i see one of this shows abut how aliens were in history i just face palm my self and turn off the tv befor ill break it

the ones that i hate the most are how some peoples say that the wall paintings (4-5k years old) of some weird humans shape thing are aliens (aaaaaaaa the stupidity)

and i think i did saw a show abut what you talk abut (it had the star child skull and how they say its an alien skull)

[Brandt761]

@ARAFELI well, personally, I believe that 50,000 year ago the Galaxy was ruled by an insect race called the Proteans. They had awesome and superior technology, but were wiped out by a group of demi-organic lifeforms called the Reapers who visit this Galaxy at regular intervals to destroy and enslave all civilization. The proteans have left artifacts on Mars, and once we find them, we can join the rest of the Galaxy in fighting the next Reaper invasion. I swear it's true!

[EmilyDNelson]

@ARAFELI Ugh, I know. Archaeology weeps.

[lolraptourz]

@greyeyed123 actually, i'm pretty sure those shows mostly exist due to people like me who watch them to laugh at them

[greyeyed123]

@lolraptourz "i'm pretty sure those shows mostly exist due to people like me who watch them to laugh at them"

And I thought they existed so I could watch them and then comment on how stupid they are on youtube, lol.

I am waiting for the episode in which the Statue of Liberty, the Empire State Building, and the Golden Gate Bridge were built by ancient aliens. What other explanation could there be? I can't imagine how else it could have been done!

[drscratchnsniff2]

@greyeyed123 thats not new....Erich von Däniken wrote several books on that possibility in the late sixties and early seventies....chariots of the gods was turned into a movie/documentary in 1970...

[GenoTheMailler]

@greyeyed123 They do make some good points, and point out so unexplained things. And then they jump off a cliff with some ridiculous claims.

[greyeyed123]

@GenoTheMailler If you mean "Ancient Aliens", then no, they don't point out any unexplained things. They point out things with obvious explanations that aren't terribly interesting to a modern audience, and hurriedly throw out a bunch of outrageous explanations they know an audience would like more all while insinuating the simple explanations are not viable.

[SummerSeale]

I wish I could like it 10 times:

5 for the Doctor Who reference as his last word before he hangs up.

5 for the Black Adder series 2 reference. =)

[ridewave444]

Too bad he probably ISN"T on drugs because it makes him look worse. I like Matt and Jen probably the best on the show. Two sharp cookies.

[whyyySOOOssstupid]

this guys theory sounds like the plot of assassins creed and how ancient civilizations are trying to extend their knowledge to lesser humans in order to help them or something

[whyyySOOOssstupid]

is everybody that calls into this show high? cos it certainly seems that

[greeny202a]

I dont get all the comments here. Whats the diference between this guy and the usual theist that comes on here?????

[theUKatheist]

@greeny202a the normal theist at least makes a little sense lol

[GreyLabyrinthine]

He, well, yeah, well not, uh, yeah, I mean- he lost me at "sacred astronauts breaking the news that they're here to us gently".

That look and nod at 2:54 are priceless.

[littleflags]

The Holy Ghost Flying Saucer

[ShroomFuu86]

the history channel has better sci fi shit than the sci fi channel. please explain this to me.

[HoLOLcaust]

@ShroomFuu86 Truth is stranger than fiction?

[gugeyewalker]

I understand the caller's point about visitor's from else where propagating religion - perhaps appearing as gods to ancient man - only because the caller's point was poorly articulated, the hosts poked fun at the caller in bad taste. The caller made an EXCELLENT point - as any sufficiently advanced civilization would seem as god or gods to us. Listen guys!

[robvlob]

I wonder how hard someone has to be hit in the head to actually think like that.

[Arondeus]

The caller is clearly a crackpot, buuuuut - his rant reminded me of a really good scifi book series by James Hogan. It starts with the book titled: Inherit the Stars.

The premise is that in 2001 (the book was written in the 70s) lunar colonists discover a Human Being, in a spacesuit, and he's like 50,000 years old.

Anyway - just thought it was funny how much the caller's rant sounded like the book. Later in life, the author was disdcredited as a hack .... maybe he was the caller?!?

[FlexibleElf]

1:54 Martin's thinking: "Ohhh here we go."

[moopism]

How come an accent like that talking about spacemen makes me think of anal probes?

[Icculus716]

Best headline ever!

[Squinch24]

What the fuck just transpired?

[noahalmighty77]

The caller sounds like a buzzed Kevin Costner,

[MrDonovanFrost]

So he believes that ancient " secret astronauts" who ARE NOT "aliens"(don't put words in his mouth)have designed morality tales for humanity to live by? Oh well it will all be explained when Jesus steps off his flying saucer.

[angusyoung9323]

the god dang astronuts r gon gitt us boys

[rocketdave]

Wait, he believes in ancient astronauts and even calls them extraterrestrials, yet scoffs at the notion of aliens? How does that work?

[ganados0]

@rocketdave Battlestar Galactica.

[rocketdave]

@ganados0  Oh, yeah.

[ReverendBrownbuttock]

@rocketdave Remember, he's from Texas, they appear to be in a whole different galaxy in Texas.

[rocketdave]

@ReverendBrownbuttock Yeah. Also, watching this again, it sounds like he doesn't even believe in the word "alien."

[uriituw]

I don't get why people would explain things with gods, astronauts, etc. Why couldn't ordinary people just write all the myths of the Earth?

[podoau]

I think this caller is actually a scientologist.

He certainly is quite mad

[BeatleEDs]

I think the caller has a great point.

[richsuga]

I think AE gets a lot of trolls these days, unfortunately.

[beatsdown]

This was a good show apart from the first 20 minutes. The first caller got owned and then culminated in this. I was amazed at how the hosts managed to keep such relatively straight faces throughout this. "I believe in astronauts." AHAHAHA!!

[lhurien]

This is your brain... this is your brain on drugs(listen to John in this video).

[RSVJosephV]

These people are scarier to me than murderers.

[UrbanFury12]

Haha I watched this live!! so hilarious. This guy is a silly goose.